Rainbow Dash was on top of the world. Or rather, flying on top of it, her wings cutting through the air with ease as the wind blasted past her. Her speed increased so rapidly that streaks of tears had appeared in the corners of her eyes. Fast tears, she liked to call them, since she really had to pick up the pace to get them.
There was clear blue skies overhead, with nary a cloud in the sky. Though the sun could be seen slowly falling in the distance, the first signs of day to night appearing. But Dash still wanted to get a few extra hours of flying done before the sun set.
Twisting midair so that her back pointed to the ground below, Dash dived downward. This caused the world to turn upside down and to rush head-on right towards her her. She just smiled at its dangerously fast approach.
She zoomed through a field of clouds, white whips following in her wake as she raced faster to the earth. The g-forces mounted and her rainbow trail streaked behind her in a spectral pathway that cut through the sky.
As the ground neared, Rainbow Dash hugged her wings to her sides, creating the optimal flying conditions for the fastest descent possible. Hooves pointed out straight, eyes squinted so hard she could barely see, Dash counted off the seconds before the ground would meet her in a violent crash.
Luckily, she always counted five seconds early. Right before she could’ve crashed painfully with the ground, her wings snapped open and her descent was reversed as she flew alongside the ground. Dash hoofpumped the air, another close-call stunt done perfectly without a mistake.
Fluttershy, however, was having an opposite reaction to Rainbow Dash’s performance. The mare was practically trembling in fear when she first saw Dash fly downwards at high speeds with no intent at slowing down. And when Dash appeared to be close to hitting the ground, all Fluttershy could manage was a cold sweat as her body stood rigid from terror. It was only when she was sure that Rainbow Dash hadn’t smashed into the ground did Fluttershy breathe a sigh of relief.
Rainbow’s jubilant shouts could be heard even from Fluttershy’s position. Fluttershy was glad to hear them. It was Rainbow’s yells of pain that strained the mare’s heart.
Over the past four months they had been dating, Rainbow Dash had gotten three sprained hooves, six crashes–four of them with a tree no less–two concussions, scrapes and bruises galore, and a nearly broken leg after a particularly bad landing with a boulder. For each injury Fluttershy had treated her the best she could, and Rainbow Dash tried to be the best patient she could be. It was when Fluttershy was treating one of Dash’s numerous run-ins with injury that the two finally admitted each other’s feelings for one another.
In many ways, Dash changed with Fluttershy as well. While Fluttershy slowly broke out of her shell and became more bolder as she cast away her shyness, Rainbow Dash in turn grew to be more sympathetic and considerate of Fluttershy. Instead of racing off whenever the two went somewhere, she stuck close by the slower mare. Dash would share her presence with Fluttershy rather than leaving her in the dust like so many other times.
But as for now, it was just Fluttershy gazing at Dash pull off stunt after life risking stunt. All of Rainbow’s injuries flashed before her eyes, and Fluttershy couldn’t help but shiver.
Completing another loopty-loop, Dash landed before her marefriend. The rily pegasus’ mane was as unruly as ever, rainbow locks tangled together and hair having that custom ‘wind blown’ look Fluttershy was fond of. Wiping off a bead of sweat from her forehead after her rigorous flight, Rainbow flashed Fluttershy a cocky grin and asked, “So, how was that?”
“It was, uh, good,” Fluttershy answered, eyes glancing to and fro everywhere but Rainbow Dash. “It was certainly… exciting.”
“Exciting? It was better than exciting! It was awesome!” Dash shouted, performing a somersault in the in the air while Fluttershy cringed slightly. “The flips, the dives, the adrenaline as you put your life on the line while in mid-flight. Totally freaking awesome!”
“Heh, yeah, awesome,” Fluttershy tried her best to agree, faking a smile the to the best of her abilities. And they seemed to work, for Dash took no consideration of her hesitation.
“And did you see me back there? I was like whoosh, and I missed the ground by only inches!” Dash was buzzing with energy, looking back up at the sky eagerly. “I can go fast and change direction on the spot. How cool is that?”
“Amazing,” Fluttershy said, a faint grin on her face. Rainbow’s liveliness always made Fluttershy’s heart grow fonder for her marefriend, Dash’s vigor contrasting well with Fluttershy’s quiet nature. “You really outdid yourself this time.”
“And I’ll outdo myself again real soon!” Dash said, bending down in preparation for another takeoff as her wings stretched themselves out. “I’m betting I can get another couple of flips done before nightfall.”
Fluttershy gulped, glancing up at the quickly darkening sky. The blue was fading to a mellow red hued by yellow and orange, the sun settling down farther past the horizon. “D-Dash, why don’t you stay here instead?” Fluttershy asked. “That is, i-if you don’t mind.”
“Stay here? Why?” Rainbow replied, standing back up and staring at her marefriend. “I still want to get a few more minutes of flying done.” She shrugged. “Besides, I’m heading back to your place tonight, so we can hang out then.”
Fluttershy nodded her head slightly. “Yes, well, I was just thinking we can watch the sunset together. You and me… alone.”
“Aw, come on, Shy. We can do that anytime we want,” Dash said with a wave of her hoof. “I have to really get to the nitty and gritty of my stunts if I ever want to get on the Wonderbolts.”
“Dashie, I know that you’ve really been training hard to join the Wonderbolts…” Fluttershy started, biting her lower lip. “But we hardly spend time together anymore.”
Rainbow Dash opened her mouth, expression flabbergasted for a moment. “What? We spend time together all the time! What did we do all of yesterday?”
“Watch you fly.”
“Um… oh yeah,” Dash said, kicking the ground sheepishly. “But you liked it, didn’t you?”
“Yeah,” Fluttershy agreed, frowning slightly. “Except for the part where you nearly crashed into a tree.”
“Hey, that wasn’t all my fault!” Rainbow pointed out. “That tree got in my way, not the other way around, so technically it’s the tree’s fault!”
“Dash… I don’t care if it’s the tree’s fault or yours.” Fluttershy took a deep breath, exhaling slowly. “I’m just tired of treating your injuries all the time.”
“You didn’t mind the first week we were a couple,” Rainbow reminded her, arching a brow with a devious smirk. “Remember all those times you had to apply lotion and alloy to my scrapes? Along with those relaxing sponge baths?”
Fluttershy’s yellow face quickly turned a few shades redder, lips puckered as her muzzle scrunched up. Dash was quite happy in the knowledge that she caught sight of Fluttershy’s wings stiffening and flexing out for a brief moment.
“Th-that was… was part of the treatment!” Fluttershy put a hoof to her face, trying in vain to hide her embarrassment.
“Were the kisses as well?” Dash asked, scooting closer to the flustered mare, fluttering her eyelashes in a seductive fashion.
“D-Dash, stop it,” Fluttershy said, looking away from the flirty mare. “You always do this.”
“Do what?” Rainbow Dash nudged her nose against Fluttershy’s cheek, forcing the other mare to look her in the eye. “Act awesome?”
“Act like nothing is wrong,” Fluttershy replied, stepping a few feet away. “Whenever I try to be serious about any aspect of our relationship, you blow it off by acting cute and… distracting me.”
“Me, act cute? Yeah right!” Dash laughed, turning away from Fluttershy with a seductive sashay of her hips. “More like drop dead sexy.”
“See! You did it again!” Fluttershy accused, pointing a hoof at Dash’s provocative flank.
“I don’t see your eyes complaining about getting a private viewing of my flank,” Dash giggled, staring over her shoulder at where Fluttershy’s pupils were focused at. “So why complain at all?”
Fluttershy resisted the tempting sight of one of her marefriend’s most attractive features and tried to get her thoughts in a more coherent order. “I don’t want to talk to your butt, Dashie. I’d rather talk to you face to face.”
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes, taking a quick glance back up to the sky. Her lips drew down into a frown as she gazed upon the first twinkling stars in the night sky, the sun already far gone over the horizon.
“Might as well,” Dash muttered with a pout, “since me flying right now is no longer an option.”
“You say that like it’s a bad thing.”
“Well duh, of course it is!” Dash stamped her hoof in the ground, kicking up dirt. “I’ve been flying all I can in order to prepare for the Wonderbolts. You know this, Shy.”
“Yes, I do,” Fluttershy whispered, casting her gaze downward. “I know from all the times I’ve had to clean your wounds, wrap you in bandages and put an icepack on your bruises.”
“Then what’s your problem with that? Don’t you like taking care of me?”
Fluttershy was silent for a few seconds, unchanging in stance as she didn’t move a muscle. The only change Rainbow Dash did notice was tears dropping to the ground, watering the earth.
“Dash, I do like taking care of you. There’s nothing I’d rather do than be with you and spend every waking second of my life by your side.” Fluttershy took in an unsteady breath, looking back up. Streams of tears fell from the corners of her eyes, Fluttershy’s eyes regarding Dash with despair. “But I don’t like seeing you hurt. That hurts me more than anything. Seeing you go out in the sky to pull off your crazy stunts and training, only to be injured later. It… it’s more than I can bear.”
Rainbow Dash stopped–actually stopped–and looked at her marefriend. For the first time, she noticed the tears falling from her eyes. For the first time, she saw the worry reflected in them. And, for the first time, she didn't know what to say.
“Shy… Shy, why didn’t you say anything before?” Dash asked, not sure whether to take a step closer or give Fluttershy some space. “I never knew…”
“Of course you wouldn’t. All you seem to care about is flying and racing and the Wonderbolts.” Fluttershy sniffled. “Am I not important too?”
“Of course you are, Shy, I love you,” Rainbow assured her, reaching out with a hoof. But Fluttershy just stood there, unmoved.
“It’s just that… that you seem to love the Wonderbolts more,” Fluttershy said, knowing she was venturing into an area of their relationship she never wanted to step in. “More than me, even.”
“I… You know that isn’t true!” Dash’s eyes wavered left and right, a cold sweat falling down the nape of her neck. “You just can’t accuse me of something like that!”
“I only said that because–”
“Why are we even talking about this?” Rainbow interrupted. “We’re both young, dead-sexy mares and in love! What’s there to worry about? Everything is perfect!”
“But Dash, everything isn’t perfect. If you’d only–”
Rainbow Dash waved her hoof, cutting Fluttershy off once again. “Look, there’s nothing else to talk about here. Our relationship doesn’t have any problems, and I intend to keep it that way.”
“Dash, you’re the problem!” Fluttershy shouted. Dash reeled back, mouth agape. This was one of the first times she’d ever seen Fluttershy raise her voice in their entire time together as a couple, much less directed at her in anger. “You care more about being a Wonderbolt than you ever will of me. I try so hard for you to love me more than them. But whatever I do just doesn’t work.”
Fluttershy wiped a hoof across her face, clearing away the tears spilling from her eyes. “I know I don’t fly as well as you, or as fast. I can never race with you or speed away into the sky like you want. I will never compete with your love for flying. I accepted that long ago.”
“Shy, don’t say that…”
“Then what do you want me to say?” Fluttershy asked, voice cold as her face reverted to an emotionless state. “That I’ll never be good enough for you? Fast enough? Awesome enough? That sooner or later you’ll just leave me in the dust for–”
“Just stop it!” Dash snapped. Fluttershy blinked, backing away hesitantly. “Just please… please stop it.” She felt tears starting to form around her eyes as well, but Rainbow Dash squinted so Fluttershy wouldn’t notice. “None of those things are true, and you know that.”
“I wish I could believe that, Dash. I really do.”
The couple stood there, in awkward silence. They desperately wanted to move closer to the other, to hold one another, to cry on one another. They both knew that it was hopeless. Soon the only illumination they had was the light of the rising moon, and the star shining brightly overhead.
At a loss for words, Rainbow Dash decided to simply watch the stars twinkling in Fluttershy's eyes. They looked better that way, she thought. More beautiful. And she really, really hoped she could see them that way again, after today.
Fluttershy, much like her befuddled marefriend, didn't know what to say. That in itself didn't bother her very much. She was used to being Fluttershy, after all; the pony that could barely speak two words without stuttering. But with Rainbow Dash, she didn’t worry about being nervous or wondering what to say right. The rainbow maned pegasus just put her heart at ease.
Except for now, when she could barely breathe for the world resting on her shoulders. She wanted to scream at how complicated it had to be, how difficult and contrived it was when it shouldn’t. Why Dash couldn’t just be with her, instead of chasing after something else.
She knew she was selfish, wanting Rainbow Dash to stay with her. Fluttershy only wanted the best for others, and would often time put them before herself. But now, for one of the first times she could remember, Fluttershy wanted what she wanted. And what she wanted was Rainbow Dash.
“Dashie…” Fluttershy spoke, breaking the stalemate. “You know I love you, right?”
“Yeah, Shy, you tell me that every day,” Dash replied, a glimmer of hope shining in her heart as the first sign of a smile appeared on her face.
“Then you must know I want only the best for you.”
“Um… what do you mean by that?”
Fluttershy sighed, the sound filled with more sadness than Rainbow Dash would ever know. “What I mean by that is… well… you should be happy.”
“But Shy, I am happy.” Rainbow took a step closer, reaching out with a wing to brush Fluttershy’s side. “I’m happy with you.”
“No. You're not happy with me. Satisfied, maybe, but not happy,” Fluttershy pointed out, interlocking her wing with Dash’s, their feathers ruffling together. But it was an empty gesture. It was not passionate, nor was it romantic. Rather, it was just a rueful attempt to soothe the pain. "I've seen the way you smile sometimes, when you put your life on the line. You only ever smile like that when you fly."
Rainbow Dash frowned, leaning her face closer to Fluttershy’s until their muzzles were brushing up against one another. “Fluttershy… sure, we aren’t completely happy all the time. I’m sure I can be a complete bonehead sometimes and frustrate you. And you can be… well, Fluttershy. But that doesn’t matter, because I still love you for it. I love you for being timid and shy and quiet. Just as I love you for being brave and strong and very, very loud on a rare occasion. It’s your strengths and flaws that make you the mare I love.”
More tears spilled to the ground. Both mares held onto one another, wings latched together and tears mixing together with their faces pressed, side by side. Rainbow Dash felt Fluttershy leaning into her. She felt her face pressing into her neck, and, above all, she felt her silent sobbing. Rainbow just closed her eyes, hoof wrapped around Fluttershy’s neck as she held her close.
“I-I know,” Fluttershy bawled, her pink mane sticking to her face due to her tears. “I know that you love me, and that I love you. But that isn’t enough, Dash. It just isn’t. I love you too much now. Too much to see you get hurt during your racing, or even… or even worse.” An icy finger trailed down Fluttershy's spine, and Rainbow Dash felt her marefriend shudder in her arms. “I can’t handle it.”
“Shy, you know I’m careful. Sure, I might get banged up a couple of times, but that’s nothing to worry about,” Rainbow assured her, holding her closer and rubbing her back gently. “I always get better later.”
“But what about if you didn’t get better?” Fluttershy whispered into Rainbow’s neck. “What about if you got so hurt you can’t walk or talk or even move? Or what if… what if…” Fluttershy gulped, mouth so dry she could hardly speak. “What if you died?”
“Shy, I’m not gonna die all of the sudden.”
“But you might!” Fluttershy looked up from Dash’s shoulder and right into her marefriend’s rose colored eyes. “If you joined the Wonderbolts, a race could suddenly end up with you crashing into a wall and dying. Then what? What will I do after that, without you?”
Dash had to resist rolling her eyes. “Like I said before, there’s nothing to worry about. I’m not going to die anytime soon, so just relax.”
“You got a concussion last week,” Fluttershy reminded her, her voice no longer shaky from sobs. “Nearly broke your leg the day before. How much longer until you begin getting into worse accidents?”
“You never cared this much about me being hurt before,” Rainbow Dash whispered, brushing her hoof slowly up and down Fluttershy’s back, feathers tickling her coat. “What changed?”
“Me,” Fluttershy answered, tears finally drying on her cheek. “I care for you too much now, Dashie. Every waking second I want to be with you, and even the thought of you getting hurt makes me sick. I love you so much, I can’t stand the thought of ever losing you.”
“Shy, I promise you, I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be right here with you, I swear.”
“What about the Wonderbolts?” Fluttershy asked.
Rainbow Dash’s hoof stopped. A breeze rolled past the pair, causing their manes to be swept in the air, the couple still not moving in one another’s hold.
“Shy… please don’t make me answer that.”
“Because I already know what you’ll say?”
Rainbow gulped, feeling like she was swallowing down her entire heart. “You know if I get into the Wonderbolts, I won’t be with you all the time. I have to go around Equestria, participate in races, so a couple of shows–”
“Fight dragons,” Fluttershy reminded her, the events with the Wonderbolts battling with a greed changed Spike still fresh on her mind. “The Wonderbolts are Equestria’s air force, Dash. That means you can get into dangerous situations at any moment’s notice.”
“Oh, come on, Shy, when is Equestria ever in trouble?” Dash chuckled, stopping short when she noticed Fluttershy’s unamused glare. “Yeah… guess things can get a bit crazy sometimes, right?”
“Dash, I can handle danger when I’m with you. All those times we saved Equestria I could manage because I had you by my side,” Fluttershy said. “But with you out there, and me all alone… I can’t handle that. I’m sorry, but I just can’t. I need you, Dash, but the thought of losing you makes me almost wish…”
“Wish what?” Rainbow asked, laying a hoof on Fluttershy’s cheek and turning her head so she could see her eyes. Such beautiful, breathtaking eyes. Eyes she may never see in the same light, if things continued further.
“Wish we hadn’t fallen in love,” Fluttershy replied, and Dash's stomach sank like a rock in a lake. “If I had known I’d care so about you, and then hurt so much without you…" Fluttershy took a deep breath. It's for our own good, she reminded herself, and wished she could believe it was true. "Dashie, either you can follow your dream, and become a Wonderbolt. Or..." she gulped, "or you can be with me."
Fluttershy closed her eyes and willed herself not to cry. She didn't want to see Dash's look of betrayal. She didn't want to have to force her marefriend to make this decision. But, most of all, she didn't want to lose Dash.
“Shy… you can’t be serious, right?” Rainbow asked, unable to believe the words that just left Fluttershy’s lips.
“I am, Dash. I wish I wasn’t, but this is important to me.” Fluttershy sniffled, staring up at Rainbow Dash. “And hopefully, it’s important to you too.”
This was it, Dash realized. The big fight that either made it or broke it for a relationship. She had always thought it would be filled with yells and incoherent screaming, ending in either a heated breakup or passionate make up. But here, it was neither. Just tears, broken hearts, and a love so strong it threatened to tear both of them apart.
For what seemed like hours but was only minutes, both of the mares sat there in the middle of the road with the night sky twinkling with stars overhead and the moon at its zenith. Their world was just the two of them, dark and alone with only one another for company. Company that was in jeopardy of being split apart by what Rainbow Dash said next.
As the minutes mounted higher and the night grew darker, Dash knew she was stalling for time. Yet her mind just wouldn’t work. Every time the decision came back on mind, her brain would fizzle out and go blank once more. It was like a roadblock had been erected in her subconscious on the topic.
So Dash did the only thing she could. Speak without thinking.
“No.”
For a second Fluttershy hoped that ‘No’ meant she’ll stay with her. No to being a Wonderbolt, no to all the life threatening stunts and nonstop training. A happy, solemn no that meant Dash was her’s forever.
But from Rainbow Dash’s miserable expression, that was the complete opposite of what Fluttershy hoped.
In many ways, Fluttershy already knew the answer, but tried in vain to expect a reaction more in her favor. But it was all for naught.
“I just can’t do that, Shy,” Rainbow Dash continued, releasing her hold on the mare and stepping back a few feet. “I love you… but I love flying as well. And I guess now I realize I love it more than you.”
Fluttershy closed her mouth hard, gritting her teeth together to keep her jaw from trembling or sobs escaping her throat. Breathing in and out in so many short bursts she was practically hyperventilating, Fluttershy tried her best to compose herself and say, “Oh… o-kay.”
“Fluttershy, please understand,” Dash began, staring at the ground rather than her now ex-marefriend. “It’s not you, it’s me. And that line is actually the truth this time. I’ve dreamt of being a Wonderbolt ever since I was a filly. Flying with them and racing against them… that’s been my life goal ever since I could remember.” Rainbow Dash sighed. “But I don’t want to permanently give up on that dream just for my first love for a mare I’ve been in a relationship with for only a couple of months. If I did, I’d resent you for it for years. And I just can’t stand the thought of putting you through that.”
Fluttershy nodded her head. In the end, they’d both be miserable. Rainbow Dash because she would be forced to let her dream die, and Fluttershy for being guilty of having Dash make such a decision just for her.
“I know… and thanks,” Fluttershy said, knees no longer wobbling from dread. “Thanks for being honest.”
“Yeah, and you too,” Rainbow Dash replied, nodding her head slightly. “I guess… I guess it was never meant to be.”
“Yeah… it never was,” Fluttershy agreed.
Both mares stood awkwardly in front of one another, unsure of what to do next. Depart, stay together, keep on talking, each option was a decision that left them with uneasy reactions.
Luckily, Dash made her decision finally, and stretched her wings up. “Well… I guess I’ll be off then,” she said, kicking the road slightly as the awkward tension built up.
“Um… me too,” Fluttershy said, turning away from the mare.
“Do you need help getting home?” Dash asked with a bit more eagerness than she intentioned. She was supposed to be spending the night at Fluttershy’s house only a few minutes ago, but now that plan blew up in smoke.
Fluttershy shook her head. “No, I-I think I’ll manage it by myself.”
“Oh…” Rainbow Dash glanced back up at the sky, then returned her gaze to Fluttershy. “Then I guess I’ll be seeing you later.”
“Yeah… see you later,” Fluttershy agreed, no longer looking over her shoulder as she walked slowly down the road. With nothing else to say, Dash departed as well, soaring into the sky.
While both mares had said their piece and left, they couldn’t help but feel more could have been said. More could have been done to save their developing relationship. That their breakup was merely a copout to something that could’ve worked wonderfully.
But then they’d remember the one thing they agreed upon at the end.
It was never meant to be.
