Chapter 1: No Infinity For The Restless
Discord stared into the abyss. It stared back. Eventually, Discord blinked.
“Haha, told you I’d win,” the abyss said. “Why did you even bother trying to beat me at a blinking contest?”
Discord blinked several more times, then rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. “Okay, okay, fine, Uncle Phil. It was a bad idea.”
The voice of the abyss reverberated through the void beyond space, coming from nowhere and everywhere all at once. "I see someone is still a sore loser."
Faceless, formless, and eternally still, somehow the dark nothingness which constituted Discord's uncle managed to smirk.
“You’re just a sore winner,” Discord replied, grumbling.
“I think the phrase you’re looking for is awesome winner.”
Discord muttered darkly under his breath, slouching further as he wrapped his arms around himself. There was nothing around Discord except his Uncle Phil’s presence. The only source of light was from his own natural colors, which remained untainted by the blackness that was the void.
“Sheesh, I was only messing with ya.”
“Not really in the mood to be messed with, Uncle Phil,” Discord said. He scowled, mismatched features consorting into a gloomy grimace.
“Hey… what’s the problem?” Uncle Phil asked. His expression, while lacking utterly in all forms or ways, seemed to convey worry. “You don’t normally come here to chit-chat.”
Discord was quiet for a few seconds. This was completely unbecoming of his nature, which made a point to saturate itself in noise, smells, sights, and even noisy smells beyond comprehension just to egg on anyone around him. But the only one in the abyss was the abyss itself, and Uncle Phil had no eyes, ears, nose, or even sense of touch to speak of.
“I’ve… I’ve been summoned,” Discord said, nervously tapping his fingers together. For once his mismatched eyes turned to the same-sized dimensions and focused on the tip of his muzzle. “By my… parents.”
“Ouch,” Uncle Phil said. “You think it’s serious?”
“When do they bother calling for me when it isn’t serious?”
If Uncle Phil had an eyebrow or could even raise it, he would’ve. “Damn, that bad, huh?”
Discord rubbed the back of his neck, sighing deeply. “Yeah. Yeah. It is. They haven’t called me for a hundred millennia or so. At least.”
“You have any clue why?”
Discord shrugged. “I’dunno, Uncle Phil, you know them better than me. I got nothing.”
Uncle Phil tsked under his non-existent breath. “I got less on them than you do, kiddo. Your mom and pop haven’t been the most… well, pleasant of people?”
Discord rolled his eyes. “Yeah, big surprise.”
“But hey, they do care about you. Don’t forget that.”
“It’s hard to remember,” Discord said, his nostrils flaring briefly.
Uncle Phil sighed. “Listen, they only want the best for you.”
“You mean the best for themselves.”
“Now, don’t be thinking like that.”
“Then how am I supposed to think?” Discord snapped. “They call me out of the blue after such a long time. They never busted me out of my stone prison. They didn’t even bother to write to me!”
“Well, you know how they are.”
Discord growled. “Exactly, Uncle Phil. I know exactly how they are.”
The abyss grew silent, the void’s emphasis on being, well, a void, quite apparent. Eventually, Uncle Phil coughed, the sound somehow making an echo even without any walls around. “So why’d you come to me?”
“Because… because you’re the only one who’s different.” Discord blinked, rubbing his arm. “The only one like me.”
“You mean I’m not like all the other grumbly shut-ins with sticks up their asses?”
Discord smiled weakly, a glint of his usual self in his eyes. “Well, I’m not too sure about the grumbly and stick up their ass part…”
Uncle Phil chuckled hollowly. “Okay, okay, I got it. What do you want me to tell you?"
“How do I stop myself from being like them?”
“You mean your parents?”
“I mean our entire race.” Discord waved his hand in the lack of air. “Everyone I know is so high and mighty and just distant, ya know? You’re the only one who seems even remotely…”
“Normal?” Uncle Phil said. “Well, at least in terms with those mortals you’re familiar with.”
Discord snorted. “It’s weird. In my own family I’m made out to be the wild card, yet with the ponies I’m considered even crazier. Is my destiny just to be an outcast to everyone I’m with?”
“Join the club,” Uncle Phil said. “We could buy some matching jackets, but you know how difficult it is to find clothing in my size.”
“I think I know someone who could manage it,” Discord said with a wry smile on his lips.
Uncle Phil’s voice turned somber. “Listen, I can understand how confused you are. You’re not even all grown up, and you haven’t taken on your full responsibilities yet. Everything goes too fast, and you just want it to slow down enough to enjoy it. Heck, in only a millennium so much has changed, and you’re afraid the end is coming close.”
“I really don’t want it to,” Discord murmured.
“Soon enough, it’ll happen. After that, it’s your call, kiddo.”
Discord balled his hands into fists and shook his head. “But I don’t want to make the call! I hate decisions! Why do I have to choose?”
“Eventually, you’ll have to,” Uncle Phil said. The abyss started swirling away, the inky blackness spiraling like water down a plughole. “And it looks like your parents are going to make you. Good luck, Discord.” And with those parting words, Uncle Phil was gone.
Discord really prefered the abyss over the presence of his parents.
His mother—to his right—bright and translucent as always. The star cluster which formed her body was almost unimaginably vast, and yet, incredibly compact by their standards, a blazing beacon of a million suns burning and swirling around each other with a combined gravity that was so dense that not one of them could ever possibly escape. It was best not to bring that part up, though; she hated it when people pointed out that her incessant dieting never seemed to reduce her mass.
To the left, his father, whose appearance contrasted with Discord to such a large degree that it was a wonder the two could ever manage to see eye-to-eye. In fact, it was hard to see his father at all, the only hint of his presence being the bent light surrounding him. Uncle Phil was nothing, but his father was even less than that, a hole in the fabric of space and time. He reflected no light, and there was no substance within to grasp or hold. Indeed, he was the least of anything there could possibly be. His gravity was so immense that not even light itself could escape it. However, unlike his mother, Discord's father took pride in his endless hunger and ever-increasing yet invisible mass.
Discord slowly looked from his left to his right. "Mother. Father."
“Son,” both his parents said at the same time.
“You’ve grown,” his father said.
“His proper form is taking shape,” his mother added.
“Though the colors aren’t particularly to my liking.”
“And my, oh my, you’re as thin as a beanstalk.”
“Probably to do with his appearance. He’s cutting back his eating to uphold that silly appearance of his.”
“Oh, please, don’t chide him on appearances. You barely have one to speak of.”
“Um, guys,” Discord interrupted, holding up a hand. His parents focused their collective attention on him. “Can we cut the judging part of this meetup and go to the real reason you called for me?”
“So impatient,” his father muttered.
“He obviously got it from you,” his mother said, her stars swirling momentarily to shift like they were staring right at him in an accusing manner.
“But, it’s time to get to the point, we suppose,” his parents said in tandem. “Your time is nearly up, our son. Your coming of age is nearly upon us.”
Discord frowned. “Yeah, I kinda guessed that already. So, did you finally decide to throw me a birthday party?”
“Don’t be silly,” his mother said. Her stars took on a brief twirl, like a twinkling disco ball in the cosmos.
His father grumbled icily. “Our last gift should have been sufficient enough when you were born.”
“Oh, yes, dropping off an infant on a molten ball drifting in space was definitely the kind of gift every kid loves to get.”
“Deploying one of our race to an undeveloped planet upon their birth is custom for us,” his father reminded him.
“Besides, you love that planet… seeing how you refuse to grow up because of it,” his mother said, attempting to twist a blade of guilt into Discord’s back.
Discord wasn’t having any of it. “Maybe since it’s the only thing I have, I’m kind of leery to chuck it away and put my big boy pants on.”
His father snorted, the hole torn into space appearing to divulge a half-smile. But it didn’t reach his eyes, possibly because he didn't have any. “Keeping sentimental value over it won’t keep you from growing up, Discord. Your mother knows this, I know this, and even you know this at heart. Eventually, you’ll have to move on, and then you’ll know what to do.”
“Yeah, you guys keep on mentioning that…” Discord muttered, turning his back to his folks. The grand expanse of the universe before his eyes suddenly became a much more comforting sight.
“And we will continue to do so until you see reason, Discord. You cannot remain trapped in your room while the rest of existence rolls on without you. Our kind cannot simply be still. We need to move about, spread out, and most of all, continue on,” his mother said. “This world is only holding you back, Discord. Be rid of it and take on your true form, just like the rest of us.”
“What if I don’t want my true form?” Discord asked over his shoulder. “What if I just want to be me?”
“By the stars and quasars, have these ponies really changed you so much?” his father asked.
Discord shrugged. “Maybe they have. Have none of your own worlds changed your opinions on things?”
“Of course not. They’re only mortal creatures, lives fleeting and wisdom mere seeds to the forests of our minds. Listening to them is like believing in the tales of ants,” his mother said.
“More like gnats,” his father added.
“Perhaps even amoeba…”
“Guys, focus!” Discord said, snapping his fingers. On instinct, an explosion of balloons shot out of his ears, then cotton candy clouds sprouted underneath his feet, and finally bubbles exited his nose only to pop and form streamers.
After a few seconds of tense silence, his parents broke out into laughter. His mother’s stars brightened and flared, and a few may have even gone supernova, while his father’s laughs caused ripples in space that toppled a nearby galaxy, thoroughly ruining the day of a few million advanced civilizations.
Eventually, his father was able to say in between chuckles, “Oh, Discord, sometimes I forget how childish you can really be. Parlor tricks? Really?”
“Oh, don’t be too hard on him, dear,” his mother said, still giggling under her breath. “He’s just trying to hold onto his childhood, even after all these eons. It’d be cute if it hadn’t gotten quite so…”
“Pathetic?” Discord guessed. “You guys think I’m pathetic now?”
“Well, sweetie, when you haven’t even gotten rid of your home planet to embrace your true form and purpose… what are we supposed to think?” his mother asked.
“Most of our kind at your age have already swallowed entire galaxies, and look at you. You were trapped for a thousand years in a stone prison that the inhabitants of your world made because you wanted to have fun. You’ve turned the entire world into your own personal playpen, and you refuse to come out,” his father said. “How much longer do we have to wait, Discord? Do you know how much of an embarrassment this is to us?”
“Oh, so on top of being pathetic, I’m an embarrassment?” Discord snarled, his golden eyes burning like embers. “Is that all you guys think of me? Huh? Just that never-mentioned son you don’t talk about to your friends?”
“Discord, the solution is simple,” his mother said, her tone perfectly pleasant. “Just destroy your world. Equestria, the ponies, everything is just superficial. You are infinite. You are entropy incarnate. The greatest chaos in the cosmos, wasted on such a tiny world that barely affects the fabric of space-time. Do you really want your potential squandered on these ponies?”
“Furthermore, what about your loyalties to your own race? Do you have no kinship with them. Are you just that selfish?” Discord winced at his father’s words. “Our job since the start of the universe was to spread chaos in its purest form. Entropy. When the universe finally ends, it will be because of us, and that is all our kind wants. How could it be possible that’s not what you want?”
“What about if I’m not like the rest of our family?” Discord asked, so quietly that it was almost lost in the vacuum of space.
“Your existence depends on chaos,” his father said, almost demanding in tone.
“It runs through your body and has molded your life since you were first born,” his mother added.
“To deny chaos is to deny life.”
“You cannot exist in this world without it.”
“You are not Discord without it.”
“You are not our son without it.”
“Then what am I?” Discord screamed, cutting his parents off. He stared down at his hands, one a lion’s paw and the other a gryphon’s talon. His entire body was nothing more than mismatched parts, stolen from a variety of animals to cover his true form underneath, a dark well which burned and twisted inside his body, yearning to take on its true form, a metamorphosis meant to sunder worlds and spread entropy across the cosmos. No matter how much he tried to cover it up, he knew who he was—what he was.
He just didn't want any part of it.
“You are Discord, and you must decide,” his parents said in unison.
“Decide what?”
“Decide what you are to become,” they said. “Our son, or something else.”
And with that, his parents disappeared. His summons was officially over. Now, out in the middle of space, the universe, existence, Discord was truly alone.
He sighed. Then, with a snap of his fingers, he returned to Equestria, the eternal blackness replaced with sunny fields and bright blue skies. He walked down a path, butterflies flying overhead with birds soon following, the sounds of nature enveloping him like a comforting blanket after the cold impersonalness of space.
Arriving at Fluttershy’s cottage, he knocked on the door, and it soon opened with the small yellow pegasus greeting him with a bright and cheery smile.
“Discord! I thought you wouldn’t arrive in time for tea,” Fluttershy said, gesturing him to come in.
“Sorry. I’ve just been… held up by some complications,” Discord replied. He made his way to the small table already set up with a tea set and plate piled high with biscuits and scones. Taking a seat, he poured some tea for himself, and lightly dipped his scone into the lukewarm liquid.
“I hope it wasn’t too much trouble,” Fluttershy said, joining him. She seated herself on the opposite side of the table, filling up her cup and adding some milk. She smiled at Discord.
“Oh, no, nothing like that,” Discord assured her.
The two remained silent, the only sounds the clink of cup against saucer and crunch of the scones. Warm sunlight poured through the windows, distant bird chirping reaching their ears.
Eventually, Discord coughed slightly into his paw. His eyes flittered back and forth, finally resting on Fluttershy. “Fluttershy… can I ask you something?”
Fluttershy set her cup down and nodded. “Of course.”
Licking his lips, Discord asked, “What am I?”
Fluttershy tilted her head, one of her ears flicking the air. “Sorry, but I’m not exactly sure what you mean.”
“When you think of me, what do you think?”
Fluttershy grinned, resting a hoof on Discord’s talon. “I think of Discord, my friend.”
Discord frowned.
Fluttershy’s eyes widened. “Did I say something wrong?”
After a few seconds, Discord shook his head, a small smile on his face. “No… no, I think you said just the right thing. I expected you to say it, but I’m glad you did all the same.”
“Well, that’s what friends are for,” Fluttershy said, the two sharing a grin.
Discord nodded, taking another sip of his tea. "I suppose that's true."
As he looked up from his tea, he caught Fluttershy's smile. His parents would likely think it was a disease, but Discord knew better; it was not infection, but affection. As the corners of his mouth turned up in a grin, he chuckled.
"I guess I just needed to hear it."
Author's Note
