Mother Mare's Foal Tales

Once upon a time, in the town of Ponyville, a young mare lived above a bakery shop.  Although she had everything her heart desired, the mare secretly felt a sadness eating away at her.  One winter's night, she looked in the mirror and saw her reflection, which spoke to her.  The reflection offered her solace from her loneliness in return for telling the truth to her friends about how she felt.

Repulsed by the idea of being unhappy when she had so many great friends, she turned away from her reflection, but it warned her that she could not deceive her friends for long, for true happiness is found within.  And when she dismissed it again, the reflection melted away to reveal a darker, more depressed version of herself.

The mare tried to ignore what she saw, but it was too late, for she had seen and knew no love for herself could grow in her barren heart.  Ashamed, the mare concealed her feelings even deeper with a bigger smile, scared to let any of her friends know the truth.

However, the seed of despair had already sprouted.  If she could let love for herself blossom within, then the dark feelings would be uprooted and she could, for once, be truly happy.  If not, she would be doomed to have to lie to her friends and suffer alone forever.

As the years passed, she lost all hope, for who could ever learn to love a beast?

Pinkie rose from her bed one morning.  Across from her, a mirror hung on the wall, and she stared at her bedraggled reflection.  She hurried down the stairs and stepped out of Sugarcube Corner to greet the rising sun with a song to banish the dark feelings that had begun to stir.

"Ponyville, it's a quiet village,

Every day, great like the one before!

Ponyville, full of awesome ponies,

Waking up to say..."

"Hi Pinkie!"  a yellow mare called as she passed by.

"Morning Pinkie!"  a blue stallion chimed in.

"Hello!"  Pinkie exclaimed, waving both of her forelegs before she dropped back onto all fours and began to trot down the main street.

"There goes the ponies with their work like always

The same old stuff and things to sell

Ev'ry morning just as same

Since the morning I came

To this awesome little town!"

"Good morning, Pinkie!"  The owner of Quills & Sofas smiled at her.

"Good morning, Davenport!"  Pinkie bounced over to him.

"Where are you off to this morning?"

"The library to see Twilight!  I just thought of the most amazing party I could throw there, with streamers and balloons and-"

"That's nice.  Marie!  The quills!  Hurry up!"

Pinkie smiled, shrugged her shoulders, and continued down the road.

A group of gossiping mares watched as Pinkie bounced by them.

"Look, there she goes," one whispered.

Another nodded.  "That mare is sweet, no question."

"Always thinking of others, can't you see?"

"Never wearing a sad frown,"

"'Cause she's always being a clown,"

All of them nodded in agreement and said in unison, "No denying she's a funny mare, that Pinkie."

Pinkie poked her head into the circle from below, grinning up at them.  "Hello!"

They smiled.  "Good day!"

"How is your gossip?"  She winked as they giggled.  She trotted over to a merchant at a stall.  "Hello!"

"Good day!"

Pinkie glanced over his wares with wide, gleaming eyes.  "How is your profit?"

She returned to the main street to make her way toward the library.  The door burst open with her entrance and she threw streamers in all directions.  "Good morning!"

Twilight turned to look at her with a frown.  Her expression caused the music in Pinkie's head to screech to a halt.

"Pinkie!  Really?  Do you always have to make a mess?"

A broom and dustpan floated over and began to clean up the party streamers and confetti.

"But it's not a mess!"  Pinkie gave her biggest smile.  "It's a celebration!"

Twilight sighed.  She turned back away to face her book again while the broom finished the job cleaning.  Pinkie watched the dustpan toss the brightly colored streamers into a trash bin.  Her ears started to droop.

"I don't have time for this right now, Pinkie.  I have a lot of studying to do."

Her ears perked back up.  "Really?!  That's great!  Because I had the best idea for a studying par-"

"No, Pinkie.  No parties.  I need peace and quiet."

She bounced on the tips of her hooves over and whispered loudly, "Whatchya studyin'?"

A groan rumbled in Twilight's throat and she pushed her face closer to the book.  "Something very important.  Why don't you go bother somepony else?  I insist!"

"Oh..."  Her bouncing ceased.  "Right."  She backed out through the door and shut it behind her.

For a moment, she remained where she was, staring at the door.  She turned her head to look at the ponies on the streets, still in little gossipping groups, but somehow their faces were different.  Their smiles no longer looked friendly but instead seemed to be mocking.

"Look, there she goes."

"That pony is so peculiar!"

"I wonder if she's going to cry?"

Pinkie's lip trembled as the menacing whispers filled her ears.

"With a strange, sad little look,"

"One rejection was all that it took,"

"What a puzzle to the rest of us is Pinkie!"

She shook her head vigorously and the cheerful expressions returned to their faces.  She walked slowly to the statue near the center of town and leaned against it, her gaze sliding across the sparse crowd.  Nopony was actually mocking her.  She sighed heavily.

Unbeknownst to her, just as she had left the library, Twilight picked up her book and darted outside to hide in the bushes nearby.

"Oh, isn't this amazing?"  Twilight whispered to Spike from her hiding spot, watching Pinkie.  "It's the strangest part because, you see!"

Pinkie closed her eyes.

"Here's where you'll understand what I'm saying, because now she's most unpredictable and crazy."  Twilight lifted her notebook and began to take vigorous notes.

When Pinkie's eyes opened, the wide grin returned to her lips and she sprung forth to embrace the nearest pony.  The pony cried out in surprise, dropping his bag of apples as she squeezed him tight.  She pulled back and offered him a balloon full of all the apples he had dropped.  He looked at her in confusion, accepted the apple-filled balloon, and carefully walked around her.

Twilight flinched back to remain hidden in the bushes, continuing in an even quieter whisper, "But behind that happy facade, I'm afraid there's something wrong.  Very different from the rest of us..."

As Pinkie hopped down the road and away from the town square, all of the ponies whispered to one another, "She's nothing like the rest of us."

Twilight sat on her haunches to examine her notes.  "Yes, different from the rest of us is Pinkie."

"Wow!"  Spike hopped up to look at the notes with her.  "You didn't miss a thing, Twilight!  You're the greatest detective in the whole world!"

Twilight laughed a little haughtily.  "I know!"

"No pony alive stands a chance hiding something from you."

"It's true, Spike."  She leaned forward again to peek out from the bushes.  "And I've got my sights set on Pinkie!  She's the one!  The lucky mare I'm going to fix."

"But she's-"

"The most interesting pony in town."

"I know but-"

"And don't forget she's my friend."  She pulled back and frowned down at him.  "And don't I deserve to help my friends?"

Spike rubbed his claws together.  "Well of course, I mean you do, but-"

Twilight jumped out of the bushes.  Her floating notepad and quill followed behind.

"Right from the moment when I met her, saw her,"  Twilight rolled her eyes, remembering the greeting she had received.  "I said she's crazy and I knew."  She held her head high.  "Here in town there's only she, who is hiding something we can't see, so I'm making plans to help and fix Pinkie."

Twilight looked back at Spike.  "Come on, Spike!  We've got so much to do!"

Pinkie went to visit her other friends, but none of them were home.  Not even Applejack was working on the farm, which struck her as most peculiar.

"Hmm..."  She sat down and tapped her hoof to her forehead.  "Think, Pinkie, think...  Is there a party that you had planned that everypony's at?"  She gasped.  "Did you forget to invite yourself?!"

Pinkie jumped onto all fours and ran as fast as she could back to Sugarcube Corner.  Her eyes lit up when she saw all of her friends standing there.

"It is a party!"  She rushed forward and embraced as many of them as she could squeeze into one big hug.  "I can't believe I forgot!"

Applejack, being the strongest, was able to push herself out of the tight squeeze.  "Now, listen here, sugarcube, this ain't no party."

Pinkie blinked.  She still held on to Rarity, Fluttershy, and Rainbow Dash, all of whom struggled at varying degrees.  Fluttershy, of course, struggled the least.

Twilight had kept herself at a calculatedly safe distance and hadn't been pulled into the hug, so she cleared her throat.  "Pinkie, we're here because we all care about you.  You know that, right?"

"Well, d'uh!"  She snorted as she giggled.  She let go of the others.  "We're all BBFUTEOT!"

They stared at her.  She rolled her eyes.

"Bestest Best Friends Until The End Of Time!"

"Right..."  Twilight cleared her throat again.  "We feel the same way, so that's why we want to help you."

"Well, I could always use another hoof or two with setting up the party decorations."

Rainbow Dash groaned and buried her face in her hooves.  "This is pointless!"

Fluttershy stepped forward.  She lifted her head to look Pinkie right in the eyes.  The serious look on her otherwise gentle face was unnerving.

"Pinkie...  We're worried about you."

Pinkie returned the look with a blank expression.

"Um, that is, Twilight says she's noticed some things...  I mean, not that there's anything wrong with you, of course.  We love you as you are and we'll always love you, but... um..."

Rainbow pushed her out of the way and shoved her face into Pinkie's.  "Look, Pinkie, there's no pony in Equestria that can be as crazy happy as you all the time!"

Pinkie giggled.  "But I'm crazy happy!  So doesn't that mean there is a pony in Equestria that can be as crazy happy as me?"

Rainbow pulled away.  "It's hopeless!"

"What's hopeless?"  The smiling pony tilted her head.  Her smile grew even wider.

Twilight jumped forward, one hoof raised almost accusingly.  "That's what I'm talking about!  Look!"

The others leaned in with serious expressions as they examined her face.

"Pinkie, whenever we try to have a serious conversation with you, you just smile wider."  Twilight's hoof lowered to rest on her shoulder.  "Why can't you be serious with us?"

"But I am serious."  Her eyes darted between all of their faces.  One of her ears began to fold back.

Rarity lowered her head and peered up at her through her long eyelashes.  "Darling, if you have something bothering you, you can tell us..."

Twilight leaned in closer.  "Tell us, Pinkie!  We're your friends!"

Finally, both ears snapped back and her smile fell.  Pinkie waved both forelegs wildly to chase them away as she backed up.  "Stop it!"  Her eyes glossed over with tears.  "I am happy!  Why are you trying to tell me I'm not happy?!"  Feeling the pressure caving in, she turned and ran away.

"Pinkie!"  Rainbow flew after her.  "It's okay to be sad once in a while, but you have to let us help you!"

Pinkie jumped up and turned mid-air to face her for a moment.  She fired a party popper in the pegasus's direction and a burst of confetti, streamers, and flashes of multi-colored light knocked her off-balance.

"You don't understand!"  she cried as she landed back on the ground and resumed running.  "Just... leave me alone!"

When Rainbow Dash fell out of the air, the others ran forward.

"Rainbow!  Are you all right?"  Twilight offered a hoof to help her up.

"Yeah, I'm fine.  I just don't get it."  She turned her head to watch the fleeing pink pony.  "What does she mean, leave her alone?  Doesn't that mean something is wrong, then?"

"I-"  Twilight's notebook floated in front of her face and she skimmed her notes.  "I don't know.  I knew something was wrong, but..."  She dropped her head low.  "I've failed her as a friend..."

Spike gently punched her shoulder.  "Who, you?  Never!  Twilight, you've got to pull yourself together!"  He cleared his throat and drummed his fist against his chest.  "Gosh it disturbs me to see you, Twilight, looking so-"

"Spike, this isn't really the time for a song!"

Spike blinked a few times.  "Huh?  But-"

"We've got to figure out what's wrong with Pinkie!"  She got up and galloped in the direction Pinkie had left.  "Come on, girls!  We have to stop her!"

At that point, Pinkie had already made her way deep into the Everfree Forest.  She slowed her running and gasped for air, looking all around her.  "A-are they gone?"  She dropped down and covered her face with both forelegs.  "Oh, Pinkie, you almost blew it!"

Her sniffles and hiccups echoed throughout the dark forest.

She jumped when she felt something brush against her and looked around.  "Wh-who's there?"  She frowned.  "Twilight?"

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a flash of pink disappear around a tree.  It was the same pink as her own tail, which intrigued her, since things in the Everfree Forest were rarely such a bright color.

"Hello?"  She tentatively walked forward, but found nothing on either side of the tree.  "Hmm..."

The pink reappeared and disappeared behind another tree further ahead.  Without giving the possible danger too much thought, Pinkie started to trot after it, then ran as it got further and further away.  Soon, the game of cat and mouse started to bring a smile to her face again until she suddenly found herself standing outside an abandoned castle.

"Oh."  She tilted her head this way and that and scrunched up her nose as she stared at the open doors.  "This seems like a total trap..."  Her smile returned.  "But what could really go wrong?"

Happily, she bounced through the doors, which slammed shut behind her.  She squeaked and whirled around to look at them.

"Now it super-duper seems like a trap..."  She hummed thoughtfully for a moment.  "But, I'm already trapped, so here we go!"

She continued on her way into the derelict castle.  She felt that she was being watched, but everywhere she looked she saw only mundane items leaning against the crumbling walls.  There was a sack of flour and a pile of rocks to her right, and a bucket of turnips and a ball of lint to her left.

As she stepped into the main hall, she looked up to see a figure standing at the top of the stairs.

"Oh!  Hello!"  She waved both forelegs at the figure.  "I found you, that means I win!"

"No, I'm afraid you don't."  The figure stepped down the stairs and into the light.

Pinkie gasped.  Her forelegs dropped back down to her sides.

There stood her reflection, but no longer trapped in the recesses of her mind.  No, the sad, downtrodden face was there in the real world.

Pinkie nearly fell over herself as she scrambled backwards.  "No, no, no!"  She folded her forelegs over her face.  "Go away, before anypony sees you!"

Pinkamena started toward her.  "You were so scared of letting me out that you never let anypony in...  And now you're trapped here."

Pinkie turned her head to glance at the shut doors at the end of the hall out of the corner of one eye.  She gulped.  "You've trapped me here?"

Pinkamena raised a hoof and pulled one of Pinkie's forelegs away to force the other to look at her.  "Just like you did to me."  She leaned in.  "Why?"  Her eyes - their eyes - were swimming with pain.  "Why did you lock me away?"

Pinkie's lower lip trembled.  "Because-  oh, because!"  She pushed her away and ran for the stairs.  "Nopony would ever understand!"

"How do you know?!"  Pinkamena called after her, hugging herself.  "You never gave me a chance!"

Pinkie ran into the dark corridors, trying to escape the sound of the other's lonely voice.  Her head spun with panic as she skidded into each room and looked for a way out.  All the windows were barred and none of the boards were loose enough when she tried to push and pull them.

Finally, she found a room with a dusty bed and collapsed on it in defeat.  She gazed up at the ceiling with wide, fearful eyes that slowly began to close and she drifted into a restless sleep from exhaustion.

Time passed, simply because it had to, but there was no way to tell whether it was day or not when she awoke.  Had she slept only a minute?  An hour?  Was it a new day?

Pinkie sat up and blinked a few times when a blanket fell to her lap.  She looked at the doorway and frowned to see Pinkamena standing there.

"You looked cold, so I-"

"Go away!"  Pinkie threw the tattered blanket at her.

Pinkamena flinched, but didn't dodge the throw.  She lowered her gaze to the floor.  "Why?"

"Because...  You can't be real."  Pinkie's chest rose and fell with ragged breaths.  "Ponies aren't sad, not like you are."

"But I'm you."

"No, you're not!"  She clasped her hooves over her ears.  "You can't be me!  I'm happy!"

"But-"

"Just go!"

Pinkamena sighed and stepped backwards, shutting the door behind her.  Pinkie listened to the hoofsteps as they moved further away before she collapsed back onto the bed.

"Yes, I made the choice.  For them, I kept her at bay..."  She gritted her teeth.  "But I don't deserve to lose my freedom in this way, you monster!"

Out in the main corridor, Pinkamena crumpled to the ground and closed her eyes.  "If you think that what you've done is right, well then... you're a fool.  Think again!"

Pinkie slid out of the bed and walked carefully to the door, then hesitated.  She looked around the dusty, dimly lit room.  "Is this home?  Is this where I should learn to be happy?"

Pinkamena lifted her head to look up at the cracked stones that made up the ceiling.  "Never dreamed that a home could be dark and cold."  She sighed and lifted back to her hooves.  She continued down the corridor and turned the corner.

Pinkie pulled the door open and looked around.  She saw nothing, so she stepped out of the room.  "Am I here for a day or forever?  Shut away from the world until who knows when?"

Before she could get too far from the room, a flour sack hopped out to greet her.

"Bonjour!"

Pinkie gasped with surprised joy when the flour sack spoke and she hopped toward it.  "Hello!"

"Oui, zat is what I said."  The flour tilted some in the middle.  "So, you are madame Pinkie?"

"Yeppers!"

"I see!"  The sack hopped forward.  Puffs of white flew out every time it hit the ground.  "I am Madame le Flour.  It is good to meet you, oui oui."

Pinkie smiled wide.  She reached out and hugged the flour sack.  "It's super-duper great to meet you!"

Madame le Flour went completely limp when she hugged it.  Pinkie pulled back, stared at it for a moment, then gave it a small shake.

"Uh, Madame-"

The sack straightened back up and seemed to be staring at her, assuming they were facing each other.  "If you are going to pretend to be happy, zen I am going to pretend to be a flour sack."

"But you are a flour sack, silly willy!"  Pinkie snorted as she giggled.

The sack did not seem to enjoy the same humor.  "Non, madame.  I look like a flour sack, but I am, in fact, not a flour sack.  I am Madame le Flour."  One of its floppy corners pointed up at her almost accusingly.  "And you, madame, look like a happy mare, but you are not.  You cannot lie in this place."

Pinkie's mouth twitched.  "Who says I'm lying?"

"We do."  The bucket of turnips hopped forward with a loud clunk, clank.  "We are friends with the real you, Pinkie."

Pinkie pushed the flour sack away, causing it to stumble into the bucket and knock the turnips over.  She watched in slight dismay as the sack helped the turnips back into their bucket.

She shook her head and said softly, "That... that monster isn't me.  I'm me!"  She pressed her hoof against her chest.  "I'm the real Pinkie!"

Pinkamena walked around the corner at that moment.  "We're both you, Pinkie."  She frowned.  "I'm you."  She stepped closer to the other.

Pinkie took a step back.  "How can you be me when you're so sad?  No pony is sad.  So you're not real!"  Her lips twitched into a broken smile.  "None of this is real, is it?  This is just a bad dream and I'm going to wake up and then I'll throw a 'I'm not a crazy pony who feels sad' party to celebrate getting rid of you!"

Pinkamena stopped where she was.  The hurt was plain on her face.  "Dinner... will be served soon."  She turned away and walked back down the hall.

Pinkie let out a slow, jagged sigh and slumped against the wall.  She looked at the animated objects.  A bouncing lint ball had been added to the group.

"Forget having a party later!  Let's have a party now!"  She pulled out a bunch of streamers and threw them in the air.  "It'll be a-  Hey, where are you going?"

The others kept hopping away, but Madame le Flour paused to respond.  "We are leaving.  We have no eenterest in a fraud."

"Oh..."  Pinkie watched the colorful streamers fall to the ground.  She slumped down to the ground and poked at them with one hoof.  "I see."  She forced her lips into a smile.  "That's okay!  I can have a party by myself.  I'm not..."

When she looked up, the animate objects were gone.

"... lonely..."  Her ears fell.

She sighed and pushed herself back to her hooves.  She walked down a hall that had stained glass scenes in place of windows.  Having nothing better to do, she paused to examine the first one.

It was instantly recognizable: it showed five snapshots in time, each being when she met each of her friends.  She smiled at the fond memories of all those meetings.

"Hello, I am- oh!  Darling!  What ever happened to your hair?  It's so... wild!  Do you need to borrow a brush?  Perhaps two?"

"H-hi...  my... n-name... is, um, Fluttershy."

"Well howdy!  I guess yer here to pick up the apples fer the Cakes?""

"Hey, I'm looking for a pegasus named Fluttershy.  Do you know her?  I'm Rainbow Dash, in case she's mentioned me, which I'm sure she has.  We're friends."

"Come on Twilight, just try!"  "Um... hello?"

Pinkie giggled.  The sound echoed down the halls after she had stopped when she noticed something else.  At the side of each scene was Pinkamena.

"Well that's not right!"  She frowned.  "She wasn't there."

Somewhat annoyed, she walked over to the next window.

"Hey!  She wasn't there, either!"  Even more annoyed, she stomped to the next and growled.  "Now I'm not even in them anymore!  What in the name of party poopers is going on?"

She dropped her plot down to sit with her forelegs crossed over her chest.

"Who does she think she is, putting herself in my memories where she doesn't belong?"

"Dinner is ready."  Pinkamena kept her gaze on the ground as she turned back away to where she had come.

"Hey, wait!"  Pinkie ran over to catch up with her.  "You have some explaining to do, missy!"

Pinkamena didn't look at her.  "They're our memories."  She sighed.  "You try to pretend I wasn't there, but..."  She stopped suddenly, causing Pinkie to skid to a halt.  She reached out a hoof and put it to Pinkie's chest.  "You know you could feel me here."

Pinkie's eyes darted to look anywhere but at her.  "I-I don't know what you're talking about.  The only thing I can feel there is the joy of being alive and having friends!"  She paused, then giggled.  "And your hoof."

"How can you call them your friends?"  She withdrew her hoof and continued toward the dining hall.  "You don't trust them."

"Of course I do!  I trust them with my life."  Pinkie puffed out her chest with pride.

"But you don't trust them with your feelings?"

This caused Pinkie's pride to deflate some.  "O-of course I do."

Pinkamena looked at her with a furrowed brow.  "You don't even trust yourself with your feelings!"

Pinkie grumbled the rest of the way to the dining hall.  The meal was ordinary and had in silence, both of them sitting on opposite ends of the unnecessarily long table.

Once finished, Pinkie returned to her room.  She laid on the bed for a while, then bounced off and climbed underneath it.  Surrounded by dust and darkness, she allowed herself to cry.

"Wh-why is she right?"  she whimpered softly and buried her face against her folded forelegs.

Over the next few days, Pinkie grew less angry toward Pinkamena and even started to befriend the animate objects.

"You know," she commented, lying on her back and staring at Madame le Flour upside-down.  "You kind of remind me of Rarity."  She rolled over to sit right-side up.  "I mean, you act like her, anyway."  She giggled.  "I don't think she'd like being called a sack of flour!"

Madame le Flour puffed white smoke.  "I do not like being called a sack of flour!"

"That's exactly what she'd say!"  She turned her head to look at Mr. Turnip.  "And you're a guy, but you're, well, I mean, apples and turnips..."  She threw her hooves in the air.  "Are they really that different?  You're totally Applejack!"  Excited, she whirled around to face the pile of rocks.  "And you're-"  She stopped.

"I'm what?"

"Oh, well, I just realized there's only four of you and five of my friends, so these comparisons really don't work out."

Pinkamena stepped around a corner and commented, "I could stand in for one of them, if you want."

"Now that's crazy talk!"  Pinkie waved a hoof absently, still examining Rocky.  "You're me, of course!"

Both Pinkie and Pinkamena straightened up and stared at one another, the former in horror and the latter in surprise.

Pinkie scrunched up her face and stood up.  She started to walk in a wide circle around Pinkamena, who held perfectly still.

"There's something familiar, and almost mine,"  Pinkie thought to herself.  "I wonder why I didn't see it there before."

Pinkamena tried not to move as Pinkie examined her.  "No- it can't be.  I'll just ignore..."  She looked at the other when the examination stopped and Pinkie stood in front of her.  "But then she's never looked at me that way before."

Pinkamena cleared her throat.  "Pinkie, I have something I want to show you.  But you have to close your eyes.  It's a surprise!"

"Ooh!  I love surprises!"  Pinkie clamped her eyes shut and allowed herself to be led by the other.  "What is it?  Can I open them?  Are we there yet?"

Pinkamena smiled and finally said, "All right, all right.  Now!"

Pinkie opened one eye, then the other as she gasped.  "Oh!  Wow!  Oh my gosh!"  She bounced in circles.

A room she had never seen before in the castle was brightly lit, unlike any of the other rooms.  There were pink streamers and balloons everywhere and a large cake on a table decorated with pink flowers.

"I've never seen a party like it in my whole life!"

"You like it?"

"It's wonderful!"  Pinkie spun in a circle.

"It's ours."

This caused Pinkie to stop.  Slowly, she turned to look at Pinkamena, who was looking down at the ground.

"It's... the party I imagined you would throw when you finally told your friends about me."  She sighed.  "I've been saving it for so long."

Pinkie's brow furrowed.  Her lips twitched.  Her ears flicked back and forth.  As her eyes started to gloss over, she pushed Pinkamena aside and ran out of the room.

Pinkamena stumbled into a chair, which she collapsed into.  She sighed.  "Oh, Pinkamena, you blew it..."

Tears fell down Pinkie's cheeks as she fled to the furthest room she could find.  It was dark and grew even darker when she shut the door behind her.

For years, she had been drowning her loneliness in party after party.  Never once had she considered what that was doing to the feelings she was suffocating, how they - how Pinkamena - truly suffered as she ignored them.

Across the room stood a tall mirror leaning against the wall.  Pinkie slowly walked toward it and stopped in front of it.

Pinkie raised a hoof to gently touch her reflection in the mirror.  It was a sad face, and yet, she recognized it as both Pinkamena's and her own.  In that moment, they were one and the same.

Who was she?  Was she Pinkie, or was she Pinkamena?  Was she happy or sad?

She fell to her knees and cried freely.

The next day, Pinkamena came to her room.  She refused to make eye contact with Pinkie, who refused the same.

"Pinkie, I..."  She hesitated.  "I can't keep you here any longer."

Pinkie lifted her head.

"You win."  She rubbed her hoof against her other leg.  "I don't belong in your world, and you don't belong in mine.  So... go."

"I can just... leave?"

"Yes."

Pinkie sat there for a few moments.  Slowly, she climbed off the bed.  "Just like that, you're letting me leave."

Pinkamena finally looked at her with a scowl.  "Yes, now leave before I change my mind!"

Pinkie dragged her hooves as she walked toward the door.  She paused in front of the other.  "I...  I'm sorry."  She shook her head.  "I'm sorry!"  She broke out into a run and hurried as fast as she could to the castle doors.

As she neared them, the doors opened of their own accord.  She ran through them and...

... fell off the bed.  She blinked when she landed, shook her head from the pain and the sudden bright light, and looked around.

"Huh?"

She was on the floor of her room with all of her friends standing around her.  She blinked up at them.

"Oh, Pinkie!"  Twilight was the first to embrace her.  "Thank Celestia you're all right!"

Pinkie just blinked again.  "What?"

"We found ya in the forest."  Applejack lowered her head.  "Pinkie, we're so sorry we tried to corner ya..."

"Can you forgive us?"  Rarity's lower lip trembled.

Pinkie just blinked yet again.  "... What?"

Twilight pulled back.  "After you ran off, we tried to catch up to you.  You were passed out in the Everfree Forest.  We..."  She teared up.  "We were so worried!"

Finally, Pinkie leaned back against the side of her bed and looked up at the ceiling.  "Oh.  So it was a dream."

The others talked all at once, apologizing and questioning and babbling in general.

"I'm sad sometimes,"  Pinkie said softly, but her words silenced the others.  "No..."  She looked at them.  "Like, a lot of the time."  She grinned lopsidedly.  "Is that weird?"

"What's weird is that instead of telling us, you just act crazy," Rainbow Dash said, rolling her eyes.

"But everypony is happy, especially in Ponyville..."  Her grin fell.

"That's not true."  Applejack sat down.  "Why do y'all think I work so hard?"  She looked around at all of them.  "It's a distraction, like Pinkie's partyin'.  I mean, don't get me wrong, I love my family and the farm, an' I wouldn't change it fer nothin'.  But sometimes I feel like I'm missin' something.  Don't know what it is, so I just work to not think 'bout it."

Rarity nodded.  "Oh, well, I suppose if we're being honest, I don't always have a client or a deadline.  Actually..."  She covered her face with a hoof.  "I rarely do!  I just try to make myself seem more popular by making dresses constantly!"  She sniffed.  "But other than around the gala, no one seems to want to buy my things..."

As Pinkie listened to all of them, a warmth began to spread through her chest, though she began to cry.  "So...  I'm not alone..."

"Of course not!"  they all exclaimed at once.

"You just took it a little far with all of your partying."  Fluttershy blushed.  "I mean, well, I think that's what we're saying..."

Pinkie wrapped her forelegs around herself and hugged herself tight.  "I'm not weird!"  She laughed.  "Do you hear that, Pinkamena?  You're not alone anymore!"

Rainbow Dash raised one brow.  "Well, that might be a little weird..."

Somewhere deep in Pinkie's heart, Pinkamena sat alone in the darkness.  She sighed.  "So, she really left..."

"I knew it, I knew it!"  Rocky grumbled.  "I knew it was foolish to get our hopes up!"

Madame le Flour nodded.  "Maybe it would have been better eef she had never come at all!"

There was a loud knock on the castle doors.

"Could it be?"  Mr. Turnip hopped forward.

"Is it she?"  Sir Lintsalot rolled over to a window and gasped.

The others joined him both in looking out the window and gasping.  Madame le Flour, despite her heft, was able to move the fastest, so she bounced all the way to the room Pinkamena was in.  "Pardonnez-moi, madame, but we have visitors."

Pinkamena lifted her head and stared at the sack with confusion.  "Visitors?  But that's impossible."

She started to hop away.  "Come see for yourself, madame!"

Pinkamena hesitated before she followed behind her.  The doors burst open just as she reached the main hall and she froze in mid-step.

Twilight stepped into the room with a bright smile.  Light followed with her, spreading from the open door and running all along the walls and floor.  The disrepair began to lift, the cracks disappearing and the dust vanishing.  As the light reached the animate objects, they transformed one by one.  Madame le Flour became Rarity; Mr. Turnip, Applejack; Sir Lintsalot, Fluttershy; Rocky, Rainbow Dash.

"You're not alone anymore," Twilight said in Pinkie's voice before it returned to her normal one.  "We're here."

Pinkamena's jaw hung open before her mouth lifted into a smile and she hugged herself, eyes clenched shut to try to stave off tears.  When she opened them, she was not hugging herself, but Pinkie was before her, hugging her instead.

"I'm here, too!"  Pinkie hugged her even tighter.  "So you don't have to cry alone."

A tear fell down both of their cheeks.  The tears fell at the same time and landed on the ground near each other.  Pinkie looked down at the fallen tears and gasped loudly.

"Look!  Ohmigosh!"  She crouched down.

Pinkamena crouched with her and they both exclaimed, "It's a heart!"

Back in her bedroom, her friends came forward for a big group hug.

Pinkie returned all the hugs as tightly as she could.  "I'm the luckiest pony ever!"

"Why is that?"  Twilight asked.

Pinkie smiled earnestly big and wide.  "Because now I have, like, twelve BBFUTEOT!  Or do I count myself three times?  Hmm..."  She tapped on her chin.  "This will need some serious thought..."

Rainbow Dash slapped her hoof against her forehead.  "I thought we were done with the crazy talk!"

Pinkie laughed.  "No way, silly!"  She waved a hoof dismissively.  "This is who I am when I'm not sad!"

"Oh, great, so you're saying you're going to be even crazier now?"

"Isn't it great?!"  Pinkie threw her hooves in the air.  "We should have a crazy party!"

And so they did have a party, but not a crazy party.  Instead, they had a slumber party, where each of them shared their insecurities all through the night.  Each one of them grew stronger from the unwavering support of their friends and, more importantly, learning to love themselves for who they were.