Loving The Dark Side

Shining Armor fussled with the new medal attached to his uniform. Unfortunately his new armor was still being made to the specifications of his body type. Lucky him that he had to be born with wider shoulders than horns on a bull. But still, once he’d don it, it’d all be worth it.

Well, maybe not all of it, but it’d definitely make the job more bearable.

“Guarding Princess Luna of all people. Huh.” Shining chuckled. He held a palm to his forehead and shook his head, sighing deeply. “Not a problem. Not one bit. I’ve done worse. I… just have to be optimistic about this.”

Shining rounded a corner, his destination up ahead. The door to the Canterlot outdoors training facility, where supposedly that was where Luna was to meet him. And then would begin his illustrious career as Captain of the Guards to a woman that filled him with dread just at the mention of her name.

“Sure, sure, optimistic. Great. Yeah. I can manage that. Manage it easy.” Shining opened the door and stepped out in the blazing Equestrian sun. “Definitely easy.”

The facility was spacious enough, with a basketball court, track, and outdoors workout station set up right in the middle. Typically guards would be here to perform basic training in regards to general upkeep for performance. Rookies and recruits didn’t get to see the facility much, since it was mostly stomping grounds for veterans or senior guard personal, but currently there was no one there. No one but Luna, of course.

Shining wiped some sweat from his forehead, observing the fabled Princess of the Night. Well, she wasn’t as ‘dark’ as he first thought. She had light-brown skin, almost like coffee with too much milk added. She sat on one of the station’s benches, her knees brought up to rest next to her chin, and her hands wrapped around her legs. Her face quirked into a small frown as she sat, her turquoise eyes offering small flickers and glances, as if wordlessly letting an observer know that while she was with her thoughts, she was far from distracted from the goings-on around her.

Shining didn’t know whether to approach her or wait for her to indicate for him to go before her. Celestia was sketchy on the details of how Luna would direct him, just that he was to do what she said and guarantee her safety at all times. So, for the time being, he just stood by the courtyard entrance and waited for… some type of indication she noticed him. In the mean time, he sweated up a storm due to the bulk of his armor and uniform, but at that point in his career it was something he had grown used to.

Finally, she sighed, looking directly towards him. “Are thou waiting for a blessing to approach, mayhaps?” she flatly asked.

Shining nodded. “That’s, uh, usually how it goes, your majesty.” The awkward stretch of silence continued onward, until Shining coughed and asked, “So, um… do I have it?”

“I have no objections, Ser…” her frown deepened for a moment, “I cry thine pardon, what is thine name again?”

“Shining Armor. Captain Shining Armor, in fact.” He approached her, walking with a confident stride with a straight back and squared shoulders. Always professional and prepped was Shining’s motto, and whether it be with Princess Luna or an empty hallway in the castle, that was how he performed. “Recently promoted, actually.”

“I see,” she simply stated. “I suppose a congratulation is in order, Ser Armor. From combat, I am to assume?”

“Um… well, in terms, I… suppose.” Shining wanted to scratch an inch on the tip of his nose, where a bead of sweat was currently threatening to fall, but resisted the urge.

“I see,” Luna once more repeated. She rose to a stand and brushed back one of her lengthy starry bangs, exposing both her eyes to the man. “It has been quite a length since I’ve had a guard thrust upon me, truly. Not since I was a babe, fresh from the cradle’s embrace.”

“Well… it’s not that bad. It’s mostly for tradition, but we guards still go into the line of duty to protect Equestria’s princesses no matter the cost. Just think of me as your shadow, basically. You won’t even know I’m here.” Shining smiled, though it pretty much died and was sent to the deepest pit of Tartarus telling from Luna’s expression. “I, uh, hope you don’t mind my presence here, your majesty, but like I said, you won’t even notice me after a time.”

“Mine shadow is not the best thing to be, Shining Armor. ‘Tis indeed why thou hath to be mine guardsman, is it not?” she asked. The fact that her tone was neutral, rather than heated, unnerved him more than it should.

Shining’s smile further faltered. “Well, not exactly. I was given the choice. I chose to be your guard because, well… keep it from me not to accept a challenge, eh?” His chuckles died in his throat before they could even crawl out of his mouth from the way Luna was looking at him: completely expressionless, as deadpan a look he’s ever seen one.

“Are thou insinuating I am difficult, Ser Knight?”

“Wh-what? No, no, no, of course not! What I meant is that… erm.” Shining was sweating even more now, though he felt no heat from the sun. Luna’s icy expression was enough to freeze him still. “This assignment, um, to guard you was given to me as a choice from Celestia. I still would have get my promotion without it. It was more of a… a… preliminary test, so to speak.”

“...I was merly jesting, Shining Armor.”

Shining blinked several times. “Um… pardon, your majesty?”

“When I asked if I was vexing to thee. ‘Twas a simple jest upon my end.” Luna cocked her head. “Or is humor approached different within these days?”

“Well… typically it’s remained the same. Minus a heart-attack or two on my end.” Shining wiped a considerable amount of sweat from his forehead. “Dear Celestia, you really had me going there.”

“Going where?” Luna asked. “I thought we were going to use the area here. Unless you have a better location, mayhaps?”

“No… I meant that you had me fooled. As in, your joke really worked on me.”

“Ah. I understand thine… lingo?” she offered, squinting her eyes in thought.

“Do you have any other experiences with metaphors before?” Shining asked.

“From my own time, naturally,” Luna countered. “The speech this generation imbines in is vexing.”

“Well, I can help you with that, if you want.” This time Shining’s smile was much more acceptable to Luna’s gaze. “Just because I’m your shadow doesn’t mean we can’t chat from time to time, if you’re willing.”

“I… would not mind talking,” she said, giving a small adjustment to the belt at her waist. “Though I am, admittedly, rusty at the art compared to mine sister.”

“Hey now, doesn’t matter to me. Remember, I’m the guard, you’re the princess.” Shining winked. “It’s in my job description to be attentive at all times.”

“Mmm,” Luna replied. “I’ll keep that in mind, I suppose.”

Shining glanced side to side, at the empty space of the courtyard. Not a guard to be seen, and at a time and type of weather he’d expect at least a dozen of them to be here.

“So… Princess Luna, any plans for this afternoon? I noticed that the it’s pretty… empty here.”

“Quite empty. I wonder if I am to blame for that,” she said, a wry, pencil-thin smile on her face.

Shining shared her smile. “Well, that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy yourself. Ever worked out before? It might be different, since the guards use a more modern exercise equipment.”

“I grew accustomed to chores as a child, and swinging a blade as an adult. As for modern equipment, I fear I know very little.”

“Well then, allow me to teach you the ropes then.” Shining walked over to the first set of dumbbells he could find, next to a squat rack and bench. Hefting up a seventy-five pound dumbbell, Shining grunted. “See, these are dumbbells. You can them for a floor press or bicep curl and even a shoulder press. If you want some pointers, I can teach you the basics. I think we can start you off on a, uh—” Shining turned his head to Luna and blinked. “Wow.”

She hoisted a two-hundred pound weight in her hand, rolling her forearm and positioning it as if it were the handle of a blade. Giving an experimental swing of it, she looked towards the Captain. “Is there one more cumbersome? I’d prefer something with more heft if we are to train.”

“Uh… how about we skip on the weight training for now, eh?” Shining gulped. “At least until I can catch up. How about… some cardio?”

“If thou wills it, let it be,” Luna nodded, tossing the weight to the side and letting it crash to the floor. “By ‘cardio,’ I am to assume thou means matters of the heart, yes? I recall a teacher mentioning the word a long time ago.” She gave an adjustment to the jerkin she wore, rolling up the sleeves to her armpits. “Then let us do cardio.”

“I actually meant more in terms of running around the track, but yes, cardio.” Shining began to pull his armor off piece by piece, breathing a sigh of relief to be freed from its suffocating embrace. “You just keep on running around in circles at a steady pace. Think you can manage that?”

“I’ve traveled more than my fare share in plate mail, Ser Shining. In what amounts to undergarments, I have no fear of keeping up.”

“Excellent.” Shining was finally free from his armor, and after rolling up the pants of his uniform and discarding his long-sleeved shirt for the plain white t-shirt underneath, he was ready to go. “Just try and keep up, huh?”

Shining raced towards the track in long strides, as fluid and fast as water that rushed down a river into a booming waterfall. Each footfall was like a piston going on and off, his muscles burning with pleasure from the effort. He smiled, adrenaline pumping through his veins in a torrent of energy. He was already halfway around the track and still no sign from Luna, but at that moment all he could concern himself with was speed: go faster, run quicker, be as swift as the wind.

Of course, it was at this moment that Luna finally caught up to him, running at a brisk pace… backwards.

“I implore you. Go at a quicker pace. Don’t hold back because I’m a woman, Ser Shining,” Luna encouraged, easily twisting to face forward and jog alongside him.

“Oh, don’t worry. My drill instructor during my recruit days was a woman.” Shining increased his pace, breathing steadily in through his nose and out his mouth. “Toughest bitch under the sun, and that was her congratulating herself.”

Luna gave a laugh, not even breaking a sweat. “Indeed? The times have changed. It was always considered queer that I walked a warrior’s path in my day.”

“Well, seeing how Equestria has lived in peace for centuries, it looks queer to most everyone these days. But hey, someone’s got to do it,” Shining said. “In fact, the last big disaster that had to have the Royal Guards involved was the Night—uh… the incident a few weeks ago.”

“Don’t hide the truth away from me, Shining,” Luna rebuked. “Hiding the word away in a coat of sweetness will not change what happened.” She looked toward the sky. “How many lives were lost? If I may ask.”

“Well, luckily enough, none. The rest of the guards got quite a scare in the Everfree. Let me tell you, the stories about all the monsters in there don’t even tell you half the freaky things you’ll see.” Shining glanced to Luna, who was looking off indifferently in the distance, not even breaking out in a sweat. “I managed to take the initiative and lead the rest of my men to safety. One of the reasons I got the promotion in the first place.”

“I’m thankful for that, at least,” Luna answered. “Thou must have performed well to prevent casualties. Your rise to Captain was well deserved, Shining Armor.”

“I thank you, Princess. I was just doing my duty.”

The two continued to run in silence. Luna’s pace remained as even as ever, her face expressionless and her eyes focused at the task at hand. While Shining Armor was certainly fit due to his guard position, even he began to tire, and on a sweltering hot day like that one, his pace weakened and ebbed until he was fit to fall over. Only reason he hadn’t stopped or slowed down was because he struggled to keep up with Luna, which now looked to be more like a death sentence than challenge.

“I am not quite as magically inclined as my sister,” Luna spoke suddenly. “But even I can sense you’re pushing yourself quite far, Shining.”

He shook his head. “N-nah, it’s fine, really.” Shining pointed forward, his path wavering sporadically on the track. “Just keep it moving forward, I got this.”

“As you wish.” She increased her tempo, swinging her arms out farther and actually taking deeper breaths as she made her way around the track.

After a few more laps, Shining could barely stand up straight, now moving at a pace that would make a sloth seem like a speedster. As Luna rounded up close to him, Shining grunted, “No problem. I’ll… I’ll catch up just… just fine. Princess… yeah.”

It was then that Shining finally collapsed, and on his face at that.