A Look Into Witchcraft

by Masterweaver

Rating: teen
Tags: Princess Celestia, Crossover, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Random
Length: 8357

Twilight Sparkle creates a spell that lets her go into other worlds. Too bad the first world isn't as pretty as it seems...

((Cover Art generously provided by Already-Bee-Nclaimed of Deviant Art. She may not have many works, but they're all top notch. Go check out her gallery at http://already-bee-nclaimed.deviantart.com/ RIGHT NOW.))

Published 2012-06-01 00:34:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-06-26 16:47:45 UTC

A Look Into Witchcraft

Twilight Sparkle trotted down the road of Ponyville, completely invisible.

Well, all right, that wasn’t exactly true. For one thing, a small cone near the front of the invisibility spell allowed light to get through, allowing her to see and, from certain angles, providing a glimpse of her violet eyes. For another, this wasn’t exactly her Ponyville. Princess Celestia had been surprised when her faithful student managed to develop a harmonic transfer spell, allowing her to teleport to another universe; still, she allowed her to test it with some precautions, such as being invisible and avoiding her alternate. For the most part, this Ponyville seemed identical, although the ponies had a habit of simply stating what they were doing.

“Toss!”

“Cloud!”

“Catch!”

“Cloud!”

“Kick!”

“Walking!” Twilight giggled to herself as she joined in. It was fun, in a nonsensical kind of way. So far this world seemed... well, fairly nice. She grinned as she saw the cutie mark crusaders walk by; those three were adorable in whatever reality they--

“I Am Just SayIng That The RaTiO Of SucCess In This VenTure Is OnLy 15 Out Of One HunDred.”

--bawha?

Twilight stared at Sweetie Belle. She had sounded... completely different. Even weirder was that the other two crusaders didn’t seem to notice.

“Oh come on, Sweetie Belle, don’t be a wuss!” Scootaloo gave the unicorn a friendly punch (and Twilight noted the odd clang) and looked around. “We’re bound to get our cutie marks in robot hunting!”

“Yeah! Mah sister has told me thay jus blow up in tha most awesome way!” Apple Bloom grinned like a maniac. “Well, she didn’t say like that, o course, but that’s what she meant.”

“But IDentIFyIng A RoBot Is ExTremeLy DiffICult,” Sweetie Belle pointed out as she whirred along. “WithOut CutTing Off Their Skin They Look And Act ExActLy Like Us.”

Twilight found herself following the fillies in a daze. Robots? Robots that looked and acted... was this Sweetie Belle a robot? How would Applejack know about robots exploding? Her thoughts were interrupted by the arrival of a cyan pegasus, skidding to a halt in front of the fillies.

“Hey you!” She pointed at the white filly that Twilight was absolutely sure was not Sweetie Belle. “I was just dashing round rainbows and I had this Rainbow idea that your sister could make me a dashing big hat so my dashes could be more rainbow but I can’t dashing find her! Where the rainbow is she?!”

“It’s VetErAn's Day,” the not-unicorn replied with a roll of her eyes. “She’s On The KitchEn Floor SobBing And UnABle To Do ANyThing.”

What?! What?!

“Yeah, Ah know how that is,” Apple Bloom sighed. “Applejack always heads over to the destroyed schoolhouse and starts reciting her apologies tah the foals.”

WHAT?!

“Hey, I’m lucky, I lost my parents in the war.” Scootaloo shrugged. “I don’t have to deal with that shit.”

WHAAAAT?!?!?! And where did Scootaloo learn such bad words?!

Rainbow shrugged. “Well, I guess I’ll have to wait then. Rainbow Launch!” She took to the skies, leaving three fillies and a flummoxed invisible purple unicorn to their fates.

So there was a war?! Did this have something to do with the robots, or, or, and Rarity and Applejack--? Twilight shook her head. No, she was an observer. She could read up on the world’s history later. No need to panic, a historical deviation was to be expected. Still, she couldn’t shake a horrible sense of dread. If she were home, she’d just talk to her friends... but here, she was alone, at least until she pulled the thread leading back to her world.

Still, checking up on her friends seemed like a good idea. And Fluttershy’s place was around here. It’d be nice to see the kind pegasus. With a confident smile on her invisible features, the unicorn set down the trail to Fluttershy’s cottage.

Huh. That was odd. None of the animals seemed that active. They were happy, obviously, but... not roaming, in the sense that most animals did, but instead with slow, deliberate and sluggish motions. And Fluttershy’s windows seemed rather... dark.

Hairs pricked up on Twilight’s neck.

Without thinking, she teleported to the other side of the door.... and stood, horrified, watching Pinkie and Fluttershy battle a horrible THING, all arms and tentacles and teeth and eyes. The most disquieting detail, though, was that the battle was completely silent. Even when the beast shattered through a table, or Pinkie cried out in pain at a gash, no noise reached her ears.

Observational integrity be damned, she needed to help these girls! Dropping her invisibility spell, Twilight built up a magical charge in her horn, formulating a banishment spell and aiming it at the abomination. The light shot forward, smacking the mass dead center; every part of the creature began to shimmer, before shifting into sparkling dust and imploding.

Every noise hidden by the battle burst into the air, fifteen minutes of sound packed into ten seconds. The ponies all winced at the screams and growls and splintering noises assaulting their ears. When it finally ended, they stood up, breathing heavily.

Fluttershy was the first to speak. “That.... was not lord Smooze.”

Twilight gave her a befuddled look. Lord who?

“Well, I told you gypsy magic didn’t work like that!” Pinkie shook her mane as though nothing had happened. “But noooooo, you had to try and summon your apocalyptic god with some ceremony that wasn’t even designed for it!”

“Gypsy magic?” Twilight asked, rocking on her hooves.

Fluttershy was beside her in an instant. “Oh Tw--I mean, Princess Twilight. Um, could you not report us to the magic police?” She smiled gently.

“Wha--” Twilight shook her head. “Oh, um, no! I won’t do that, Fluttershy.” We’re friends, right? she almost added, before remembering it might be bad to make assumptions about this world.

“Besides, it was all Fluttershy’s idea anyway,” Pinkie explained. She gave the pegasus a miffed glare. “I’ve already got my parents back, so I don’t need to do any more gypsy magic, but she just INSISTED. Oh that reminds me, I need to go change their diapers!” With a beatific smile, Pinkie hopped out the door.

“Are we just going to let her go like that?” Twilight asked, looking at the various scratches on her pink frie--on the alternate of her pink friend. She needed to go change her parent’s diapers...?

“There will be other sacrifices,” Fluttershy replied comfortingly. “Besides, we have an open hellmouth now. I’m going to try to find some lesser demons to feed to our fellow servants of Lord Smooze... well, um, unless you need me for something.”

The pegasus caught the absolutely terrified expression on the unicorn’s face.

“Oh don’t worry, Twilight! If you prepare them properly, demons can actually be quite tasty!” She giggled. “They’re even better when they’re still alive, but I wouldn’t ask that of anypony who didn’t want to take the risk.”

“Oh! Oh, ha, yes. Thanks, but... I need to go now, and check up on Spike.”

Fluttershy nodded in understanding. “You poor dear. Remember, not a word to the magic police! I’d hate to have to break your horn off.” With a happy hum, she trotted into the kitchen.

Twilight flicked her invisibility spell on and darted out of the building. The stormclouds above poured rain as her mind reeled. Pinkie and Fluttershy were opening portals to summon some... THING? Rarity and Applejack had PTSD from a war?! Secret robot spies were everywhere?!?! She needed to make sense of this world! And Fluttershy had called her a princess... maybe, maybe all the Elements were princesses, but then why were they not in their own palaces?!

She caught a glimpse of Applejack herding the CMC out of the rain. Sweetie Belle was spasming occasionally. “Now come on, girls, ya’ll can get into Rarity’s magical contact collection tomorrow, when she snaps out of her episode.”

Magical contacts...?

Twilight shook her head, running toward the library. The same statements she’d regarded as amusing and nonsensical now seemed mocking and insane.

“Running!”

“Soaking!”

“Splashing!”

“Shelter!”

“I’m amareican!”

Finally she managed to reach the familiar yet strange treehouse that was her home. She paused briefly, using a spell to dry herself--an invisible unicorn dripping everywhere would cause questions--and darted in, her eyes scanning the shelves. History, history, history, history--AH! With a quick glance around she grabbed the book and dove into the basement.

A light appeared on the end of her horn as she opened it with caution. Her eyes scanned the first passage... then the next.... words merged into terrible images

...discovery of the robot valley was both a blessing and a curse to ponykind. While the robots had many powerful devices and magics in their possession, their insistence on trade as opposed to surrender was too blasphemous for the ponies to bear. Obviously, creatures without flesh could not have souls; with that in mind, princesses Celestia and Molestia ordered that the technology be taken by force. Thus began the great war...

“We... struck first?” Who was Molestia? The book associated her with the moon, but surely that was princess Luna’s domain?

...lesser races joined the robots in an attempt to overthrow their pony overlords. Obviously such action was foolhardy; Equestria allied themselves with the dragons, enchanting them into our service, and the opposing forces were eventually forced to surrender. However, the robots were discovered to have found a way to blend into pony society...

Enslaving dragons...?

...to this day, sympathizers continue to hide robots in their own homes; the robots themselves do not realize their soulessness, which prevents them from going on a vengeful rampage. All dragons are carefully monitored by the royal draconic bondage service, in order to ensure their continued and unbreaking servitude to Equestria. Our former enemies now happily serve us in probation corrals, some of them even achieving working-class status. Truly, it is an age of prosperity.

Twilight shut the book, unable to take any more. Without a word, she tugged at the spell thread keeping her connected to her home....

***

“Ah, Twilight, my faithful student. How was your sojourn into the unknown?”

Twilight Sparkle managed to raise her gaze to Celestia’s face.

Then she broke down into tears, wrapping herself around the princess’s leg. “It... it was... it was horrible...”

A Ride through the Witchcraft

“...we have to save them.”

Spike glanced up from the comic book he was reading, raising an eyebrow. “Save who?”

“The robots! And, and the dragons, and all the other creatures that...” Twilight shuddered. “...that are enslaved in that other reality.”

The young dragon rolled his eyes. “So, let me get this straight. You want to go to back to that universe you found four weeks ago, somehow rescue a good portion of the population, and integrate them into a society comprised of individuals that look exactly identical to their former oppressors.”

“YES!”

With a sigh, Spike picked himself up and walked toward the librarian. She was in one of her moods again, the kind that tended to lead to epic mistakes and adventures. And while he had nothing against adventures, on the whole... sometimes she let her plans get in the way of her critical thinking skills. “Look, Twilight. It’s a horrible place. But just plucking them out of it won’t solve the problem.”

“...You’re right, Spike.” The unicorn hung her head. “A mass relocation wouldn’t change anything.”

“There, you see?” Number One Assistant Spike patted his lifelong companion on the shoulder. “You’ve just got to think these things through.”

“...but if we opened diplomatic relations with the other world--” Twilight ran to the bookshelves, pulling out as many titles on negotiation as she could. “--of course that would mean I’d have to find out how their government worked--oh, and factor in culture shock, can’t forget that--”

Spike sighed. Well, he had tried... “I’ll go get the girls.”

“What? Nononono, you can’t!” The librarian shut the door quickly. “This place is terrible enough WITHOUT showing them how their alternates are! I know Fluttershy would be terrified of herself, and we can’t risk them meeting.”

“So, just cast that invisibility spell.” Spike shrugged. “It’s not like anypony over there will be looking for them, and they might find out things you wouldn’t notice. And quite frankly, I’m not willing to let you go back alone.”

“But... but...” Twilight tried to come up with a good counter, before resigning herself. “Fine. I’ll prepare a few invisibility spells and run up the harmonic runes. Just make sure they understand this isn’t going to be pretty.”

Spike smiled. “You got it.”

***

The five mares stood in the middle of the chalk circle, eyeing the runes around them while Twilight flicked her horn through the air.

“Darling,” Rarity hazarded, “I may not be up to speed on my magical studies, but... why are there two concentric circles? I always assumed that only one was necessary for most spells.”

“Inner circle will transfer us there, outer circle will pull us back.” Twilight nudged a totem into place. “The fact is, both spells have to be cast at the same time for proper harmonization. Otherwise the tunnel collapses.”

“And what happens if tha tunnel collapses?” Applejack asked, looking upward instinctively. “Do we get crushed?”

“Oh no. Nononono.” Twilight smiled and waved a hoof reassuringly.

“Oh good.”

“It’s more of a stretching. Like taffy!” She tapped her hoof on the ground. “And I think you’d survive the process, although maybe you’d be half trapped in another world...”

Twilight noticed all the horrified looks she was receiving.

“...buuuuut that would only happen if I didn’t cast the spells at the same time! And, you know, I can do that.” The unicorn laughed awkwardly. “So, no danger. OH! Also, I need to make you all invisible.”

“Invisible?” Fluttershy tremored, glancing around. “I... I wouldn’t mind that, but how would we know where everypony else is?”

“I...” Twilight paused, bringing a hoof up to her chin. “I hadn’t thought about that.”

“I did.” Spike pulled out six gems, each a different type. “You girls all carry one of these. Twilight and Rarity will be able to find you even if you’re invisible, and if you need to see if anypony here is around you just say ‘Gem Sandwich.’”

“Thank you Spike!” Twilight took the gems and floated them to the mares, giving the dragon a warm grin. “I’d suggest we pair off. Rarity, you take Fluttershy, and I’ll go with AJ.”

“Whoa whoa whoa!” Rainbow clapped her hooves together. “I’m with Pinkie? Why am I with Pinkie? Uh, no offense.”

“Isn’t it obvious silly?” The pink blur bounced up and down happily. “My Pinkie sense will let me know where the other girls are!”

Twilight blinked. She hadn’t actually considered that. “...Yes! That’s why.”

“Oh, okay.” The cyan pegasus took her gem and descended to the ground. “I guess that makes sense.”

“Oh here, let me make some modifications...” Rarity walked out of the circle, opening her saddlebags and pulling out a few scraps of cloth. “Let’s see... hmmm... yes, yes, no, yes, no no no, yes, yes, no, yes...”

“Um... what are ya’ll doing?”

The ivory unicorn glanced over her shoulder at the cowpony. “I’m making necklaces out of scraps and those gems! That way we won’t ever lose them.” She telekinetically wrapped the selected patterns around the precious stones, and with six flashes they transformed into makeshift pieces of jewelry wrapped around the pony’s necks.

The fashionista eyed them critically. “...not the best, but then, we’ll be invisible. So it doesn’t really matter.”

Pinkie Pie bounced up and down with excitement as she bounded over to her. “Come on back into the circle! Let’s go, let’s go!” She pushed Rarity into the enclosure of runes.

“Alright!” Twilight stamped a hoof for attention. “This will be a three part spell. First: I make you invisible; that will last for three days or UNTIL I dispell it. Then I’m going to be casting the two harmonics spells. Stay in the circle, no matter what happens, until I say you can move. This is a reconnaissance mission, which means exploring and observing but NOT interfering. Let’s all try to be back at the spell entrance in five hours, okay?”

“Um, Twilight?” Fluttershy gathered her confidence. “What is this other world like?”

“...it looks the same, but under the surface it’s just... horrible.” The unicorn began casting. “No more questions, I need to focus...”

====

They arrived, without incident, in the Ponyville town square. Twilight nodded to herself, reaching a hoof out and managing to find Applejack’s... flank.

“Ahem.”

“Oh! Sorry, just...” Twilight blushed under her spell, retracting her hoof. “Just making sure you were there.” She glanced around, keeping her voice low. “All right, remember your pairings and try not to be heard. AJ and I will head to Sweet Apple Acres and find out how the farming profession operates, Fluttershy and Rarity should go to Carousel Boutique to learn about the war. Pinkie and Rainbow--”

“I think we should go to Sugarcube Corner,” Pinkie interrupted. “Something feels off in there.”

The unicorn blinked. “Uh... I was thinking you should, you know, find some textbooks on governmental policy.”

“No, sorry, definitely Sugarcube Corner. I feel it in my bones.” Pinkie began humming to herself, her voice fading as she apparently trotted away.

“Pinkie wait--!” Twilight sighed. “Fine. Rainbow, stay with her, and try to get some textbooks at some point.”

“You got it.” There was a whoosh of air as the invisible pegasus flew off, trailing the humming sound.

“Are ya’ll telling Rainbow to steal textbooks?” Even as quiet as the voice was, Applejack’s disapproval was felt by the invisible scholar.

“It’s not like we wouldn’t return them, you know! It’s just for research!”

“As dismayed as I am to admit it, Twilight has a point.” Rarity managed to convey resignation. “Fluttershy, if you would be so kind as to extend a wing and put it on my back, we can head off without losing each other.”

“Okay...” There was a moment of silence, and then a quiet “eep” as the pegasus felt her friend take up residence under the limb. Then the sound of hoofsteps walking away.

“Right.” Twilight steeled herself. “You ready for this AJ? You’re going to see yourself, and you might not like it.”

There was a snort and the sound of hoofsteps. “It can’t be all that bad, Twi. Ya’ll survived meeting yerself.”

“Um, actually, I avoided myself.”

Twilight seriously wished she could see her friend’s expression in the moment of silence that followed.

“...Well then.” Applejack sighed. “Looks like we’ll be having ourselves some adventure.”

***

Pinkie slipped into Sugarcube Corner, heading for the kitchen immediately. She didn’t bother glancing at the sweets on display, her mind focused only on the sense of wrongness she had felt in the area.

She could feel the twists in the timespace continuum, all centered on the cauldron that her alternate was currently monitoring. Strange strands of magic were spiralling around the room, which really made her mane frizzle. More worrisome, though, was the intense expression her alternate had. One which spoke of years of tragedy, reformed into a drive for power.

“Boil, bubble, toil and trouble...”

Her alternate raised her head suddenly. Then without warning she shoved the entire cauldron into a pantry, hiding it quickly and returning to the oven.

Moments later, Twilight Sparkle entered. A brief wind also signaled the presence of the invisible Rainbow Dash; Pinkie smacked a cabinet, getting the attention of everypony, but she was already hopping toward the pegasus with a grin.

“‘Gem Sandwich.’”

“Oh there you are...”

“What was that, Pinkie?” Twilight asked brightly, walking toward the cabinet. She opened it and peered inside, unaware of her invisible watchers.

“Well, I don’t know! Maybe the sink’s broken, or one of Fluttershy’s creatures got in.” The alternate Pinkie--Pinkie decided to call her Bubbles in her head--wandered over to the cabinet and looked inside as well. “Huh. Weird, all I see are baking supplies.”

“Do you think they’ve developed life?”

“Nnnno, they’re definitely dead. See?” Bubbles poked them. “No heartbeat, no motion.”

“Well, better safe than sorry!” With a flare of her horn, the baking goods burst into flame. Ignoring Bubbles’ sudden attempts to put the blaze out, she wandered over to the fridge. “Hey, I came to see if you could bake me a really big cake.”

“YOU JUST SET THE FLOUR ON FIRE!”

“Big deal, get some more!” Pulling out a soda, Twilight turned around to see that Bubbles had managed to contain the inferno and was even now quelling it. “See, the thing is I need to bribe Celestia into officially recognizing me as princess, and she really likes cake. Like, REALLY likes it. So I want you to make the best cake ever for me, kay?”

Bubbles glared at her. “And what do I get out of it?”

Twilight grinned. “My continued friendship, of course! Oh wow, those are some AWESOME knives you have on the wall!” She grabbed one with her magic, popping open her soda and flicking the lid into the trash. “So shiny. I bet you could cut through anything with them!”

Pinkie watched her alternate breathe in, then deflate. “All right. Okay, I’ll... make you the cake. But it’s going to take a couple of months to get all the special ingredients.”

“Aw, thanks Pinkie!” Twilight replaced the knife. “I knew I could count on you!” She hummed to herself as she left the bakery, sipping the soda without a care in the world.

Bubbles sighed, shutting the cabinet and pulling out a paper. “Let’s see, I have a hundred bits to spare, which should be enough to restock but won’t pay for repairs. I guess I could work the poledance circuit again, but I’ve put on a few pounds...”

Pinkie recoiled silently, trying not to break out in tears at how casually her other self took this setback. Didn’t she have insurance? And why did Twilight just....

“Psst.” Rainbow’s voice emerged from thin air. “Let’s follow that Twilight. Our Twilight wants us to get some textbooks, and she lives in the library, right?”

“...Yeah. Yeah, let’s get out of here.”

***

If they weren’t invisible, Rarity would have just opened the door. But she seriously doubted her alternate wouldn’t notice such an intrusion, given that she was right on the other side. She tilted an ear to listen to herself, trying to take as much information as she could from the talkative unicorn in the boutique.

“...but I don’t think Rainbow Dash is a robot, dearie.”

“Why Not? She Is So Flat She Has To Be ArtIFicIAl.”

“Wow,” Fluttershy murmured. “Sweetie Belle really does sound different.”

Boutique Rarity sighed. “Dash has astigma, dear, do you really think a robot would have problems with their vision? Now be a dear and help me organize these dragon scales.”

“OKay!” There was the sound of whirring as Sweetie Belle presumably assisted her sister in her task.

“This is ridiculous. How can we spy on ponies we can’t even see?” Rarity glowered at the door, trying to will it to slip open. “And why do I have dragon scales? Those aren’t easy to come by, unless they’re ripping them off dragons and that’s quite frankly barbaric.”

“I don’t know, Rarity.” Fluttershy’s wing rose from her back briefly in what the unicorn assumed to be a shrug. “Twilight did say this world wasn’t as nice as ours...”

There was a sigh from Boutique Rarity. “Nonono, the thicker scales go in this box, and the thinner ones in here.”

“What ABout The Ones With Skin Still AtTached?”

“Oh just tear off the skin and throw it in a bag, Fluttershy will feed it to her pets later.”

“HooRay For EfFiCient ReSource ManAgeMent!”

On the other side of the door, two invisible ponies would have had very pale faces if they were visible.

“Oh would you look at the time! I’m sorry, Sweetie Belle, I have to go appease Lord Smooze. Why don’t you go find those friends of yours you hang out with?”

“You Mean The SnooTy Snark InVadErs? The ApPle Bloom And ScootALoo UnIts Do ProVide High LeVels Of FriendShip And Fun.”

“Just don’t burn down town hall again!” Boutique Rarity opened the door, oblivious to the two invisible ponies suddenly jumping aside to let her walk down the path. “I’ll just take this bag of dragon scraps to the spa.”

“That Was OnLy One Time, And It Was The Fault Of The Wall-Eyed PegASus!” Sweetie Belle protested as she walked after her sister.

“Now now, Sweetie, we all agreed that the Wall Eyed One doesn’t exist as such a creature would be a curse upon the community.”

“VeRy Well. InItIAte LoCaTion ProToCol: TarGets ApPle Bloom And ScootALoo.”

Their voices faded into the distance.

Eventually, Rarity crawled out of the bushes. “Fluttershy? Are you still there?”

“...yes.”

“We need to go inside and find anything we can about the war.” She took a deep breath. “Are you... ready for what we might find?”

“I, I think so.”

The unicorn nodded to herself, cautiously opening the door. With some trepidation, she and the pegasus stepped in, looking around the shop in ever increasing horror. Neither of them need to inform the other of what they had noticed; flesh was as much a material in the clothing as fabric. Almost simultaneously, they rushed out the door and lost their lunch in nearby bushes.

***

“...No. That ain’t me at all.”

Twilight sighed. “I warned you that you might not like it.”

“Look, just look at what she’s doing! She’s treating all tha cowfolk like animals!”

“Yes, Applejack, I see it.”

The two of them were watching the native apple matron gathering up cattle. With a whip. Applejack noted one of the cows trying to sneak away, but winced when her alternate flat out bucked the beast back into place. “She just broke that poor girl’s ribs! Did ya see that?!”

“Yes. I warned you that these ponies aren't like us. Did you know this version of Fluttershy is trying to summon some sort of demon to destroy the world?”

“That’s it, Ah can’t stand aside and let this happen.” With a growl, she galloped down the hill, ignoring her friend’s cries for her to stop. Without even thinking about it, she body checked her alternate and punted her into the air.

“Whoa nelly!” The other Applejack stood up, coughing and looking around. “What in the hay was that, an invisible rattlesnake?”

“How bout an invisible pony, ya sad excuse fer an Apple?!” She swung with her right hoof, connecting with her alternate’s cheek. “Why tha hay are ya’ll treating these cows like that?!”

“It was a war, Ah did what Ah had to do ta keep mah family safe! Now git ya damn guilt complex!” The other Applejack shook her head, eyes whirling.

Applejack backed away, unsure where that outburst had come from, and ran into an invisible unicorn. Said invisible unicorn proceeded to feel around her face until she had a hoof over her mouth; the earth pony didn’t need to see Twilight to know she was being glared at.

“Hey sis, why are ya’ll wrassling the ground like that?” A huge red stallion walked up to the other Applejack, helping her up. “Yer supposed ta be handling tha cows, not wrestling tha mud!”

“Sorry, bro, it was another conscience induced seizure.” The mare shook her head and dusted herself off. “Ah thought Ah got over that years ago.”

“Ah, but who can fathom tha dark depths of tha soul.” The stallion shook his head sadly.

“Don’t ya’ll muddy things with yer fancy philosophikies! Ya’ll could bring tha Inquisition on us!”

“Inquisition?” Twilight murmured. “I never heard of an inquisition in this world...”

Applejack shrugged silently, watching the two apple farmers finish their round up. No use denying what they were doing. Still, it disgusted her, seeing them treated like that...

Finishing up the job, the two farmponies triple locked their prisoners in, casually strolling toward the barn. “Ya know Apple Bloom went off ta play with those friends of hers.”

“Really?” The other Applejack snorted. “Well Ah’ll be a durned rattlesnake. She at least finish her chores?”

“Eeeeyup.”

“Welp, ah won’t have ta git out tha hickory wand then. How bout ya, Mac, ya got yer work finished?”

“What work can be redeemed by tha hooves of ponies? Ever there is something ta be done, and always we toil--”

He caught his sister’s glare.

“Er, Ah mean, Eeeeyup.”

“Good. Why don’t ya’ll go back ta yer attic then, do whatevar it is Ah hear ya doing all the time. Ah’m gonna head ta town and see if there are any shenanigans needing mah intervention.” The mare flicked her head, walking off toward ponyville.

After the two had gone, Applejack pulled Twilight’s hoof off her mouth. “Ya know, Ah don’t think we learned anything from that.”

“Because you went and punched out yourself!” The invisible unicorn swiped at her, managing to connect with a shoulder. “There’s a reason we can’t get involved yet!”

“Did ya not see what she was doing to them cowfolk?!”

“I did! I want to save them too, believe me! But I don’t know HOW yet!” Twilight sighed. “Look, let’s just... go back and regroup with the girls, all right?”

“...Fine.”

The two of them left the farm, worry in their hearts....

***

“You know my entire world revolves around you two right?” Scootaloo glanced back with a smile. “When you’re not with me, I hide in a cave under the bridge and just write drafts for fanfics. I used to think I was a troll!”

“Wow, yer almost as pathetic as Spike.” Apple Bloom grinned widely. “He writes fantasy epics, which Twilight Sparkle says are obviously a inferior form o’ literature. He’s even writing this one about invisible ponies!”

“That Makes No Sense. SixTy To EighTy PerCent Of ComMunICaTion Is NonVerbAl. AtTempTing To Write A StoRy With InVisIBle PoNies Is An ErRor, But Then So Is Spike. Ha Ha Ha Ha,” Sweetie Belle laughed.

The three of them trotted down the road, plans buzzing around them like they often did. Around them, various cries of “Cake!” “Walking!” “I just wanted to be loved!” “Headbanging!” and other such statements pontificated on the activities that the ponies of Ponyville were engaged in. As for the Snooty Snark Invaders, they had a BRILLIANT idea to try for a bioengineering cutie mark. All they’d need to do is convince the mayor to let a bull mount her and then they’d have a combination mayor and cow, the perfect politician!

Right? It made sense on paper, anyway, seeing as mayors were always being called cows. Although maybe they should try the dog first.

“There’s town hall!” Scootaloo pointed at it. “Now all we have to do is convince the mayor to have sex with a member of an inherently inferior species and/or an animal!”

“Hey, maybe we could just slip her a love potion or something,” Apple Bloom suggested. “Then we’d shove her in a room with tha sperm donor!”

“Um.” Sweetie Belle pawed the ground. “No. A Love PoTion Is ABout As LikLy To ExIst As Us SudDenLy GetTing Pulled InTo AnoTher World.”

There was an abrupt wooshing sound, and all three girls felt themselves suddenly stretch throughout spacetime as they accidentally got caught up in the spell of an invisible unicorn. With a sudden SNAP they found themselves in Twilight’s library, six very shocked ponies looking down at them.

“Um, Twi?” Applejack nudged Apple Bloom, cautiously. “Where’d they all come from?”

“I’m sorry, AJ, they got caught up in the return spell. I couldn’t stop it in time...”

Sweetie Belle looked up at Rarity. “Big Sis, What Is HapPenIng?”

The pearly unicorn sat down, trying to avoid her gaze. “Well... you see, how can I put this...”

“We’re so sorry, girls! We’ll get you back to your world in no time!” Pinkie Pie smiled. “Twilight is super duper smart and Rainbow and I got her new books so she’ll get extra smarter and even be able to--”

“PINKIE!” Rainbow Dash clapped the baker’s mouth shut, but by then it was too late.

Apple Bloom’s eyes widened. “We’re in another world?”

Fluttershy nodded. “Yes... well, sorry.” She lowered herself to the ground, clearly ashamed of the whole situation.

For a moment there was silence.

Then, with complete seriousness, Scootaloo fixed her gaze on one particular pony. “Sweetie Belle, I want you to say it’s impossible for us to spontaneously become super rich. Right now.”

Hiding the Witchcraft

“...not to return to the other world until I give you leave. Your loving mentor, princess Celestia.” Spike raised an eyebrow. “Well, that was nice and cryptic. And how are we going to deal with three extra Cutie Mark Crusaders if--”

“Snooty Snark Invaders,” Scootaloo corrected him. She was sulking over her lack of bits falling from the sky, sitting on the library couch.

“Well, here they’re called Cutie Mark Crusaders.” The dragon rolled his eyes, putting the scroll away. “You can’t expect everything to be identical.”

“Ah’ll take care of Apple Bloom,” Applejack announced without a second thought, wrapping a hoof around the yellow filly. “An Apple’s an Apple, no matter what universe they come from.”

“I don’t think that’s such a good idea. Can you imagine what would happen if she met our Apple Bloom?” Twilight shook her head. “No, I think that I should watch her. I have a spare room in the library.”

“Don’t Ah get a say in this?” Apple Bloom asked.

The purple unicorn sighed. “You’re right. Even if we have to hide you from everypony, you should have some input on where you reside.”

“I Want To Live With RarITy.” Sweetie Belle walked up to the fashionista with a smile. “EVen If She’s Not My RarITy, She ReMinds Me Of Home.”

“Oh, that’s so nice of you...” Rarity smiled gently.

“And you do live alone,” Twilight conceded, “which works out well.”

“You Live ALone?” The unicorn filly looked up at her sister’s alternate in alarm. “What About Your SisTer?”

“Oh, she still lives with mother and father.”

“But I Thought They Died!”

Rarity winced. “Well... apparently not in this world...”

“Hey wait!” Scootaloo jumped up. “If your parents didn’t die here, maybe mine didn’t either! I could go find them and--”

Rainbow Dash coughed awkwardly. “Er... You’re an orphan here too kid. Sorry...”

“...oh.”

“But you can stay with me!” she added quickly. “I don’t have anypony else at my place, and I got plenty of room so it should be cool.”

“Wow really? A real house!”

There was an awkward pause as all the adult ponies rewired their thought process.

“Oh you poor thing.” Fluttershy hugged Scootaloo tightly. “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure you’ll never go homeless again.”

“WHOA HEY I’m perfectly fine being homeless don’t kill me!” The orange filly struggled in the yellow pegasus’s grasp.

“What? I--I would never--”

Pinkie jumped between them. “Hey! So Scootaloo I was thinking maybe you and the other Cutie oh sorry Snooty Snark Invaders should get new names while you’re here so we don’t confuse you with our versions of you! So I’m thinking maybe we should call you Skateboard Screech and then Apple Bloom can be I don’t know Malus Domestica no that doesn’t work how about Orchard Seeds and we can call Sweetie Belle Chime Wonders!”

“That’s... actually a good idea, Pinkie!” Twilight stared at her friend. “How do you do that?”

“Do what?”

The unicorn held up a hoof, paused, then shook her head. “Never mind. Anyway, we still need to find a place for Apple --Orchard Seeds.”

The little filly rolled her eyes. “So long as it’s not with tha dragon, Ah’m okay with anything. OW!” She rubbed the back of her head, looking at her elder sister...’s alternate. “What the hay was that for?”

“We don’t insult people cause they’re different.” Applejack snorted. “Ah don’t know what ya’ll learned at yer place, but here it’s wrong. Got it?”

Orchard Seeds stared at her in disbelief. “...Wow. This place really IS different.”

Fluttershy had managed to recover from Skateboard Screech’s random accusation. “Um, well, if you’d like to stay with me, I could--”

“Nothanksyouhavealottadoalready!” Orchard backed up, giving Fluttershy a very wide grin. “Allhaillordsmooze!”

“Lord who?”

There was a moment when all the foals in the room had to rewire their thoughts.

“You Have Not Heard Of Lord Smooze?” Chime Wonders stared in amazement.

“No...?” Fluttershy curled up, uncomfortable at the attention. “Should I have?”

The three otherworlders exchanged glances.

“...Invaders huddle!” Orchard commanded. The adults jumped back as the fillies gathered in a group some distance away, whispering rapidly to each other.

Scootaloo popped her head up briefly. “Is Fluttershy half dragon?”

“What? No!” Rainbow scoffed. “Both her parents are ponies!”

“How would that even work?” Rarity added. “Er... no offense Spike, I mean if it could work I might--”

“Don’t worry, I get it.” Spike fidgeted uncomfortably. “It’s not like I haven’t wondered a bit.”

As the two of them stared at the ceiling, more mysterious whispering emanated from the huddle. Eventually, they broke apart and Orchard Seeds cleared her throat. “In order ta keep a low profile, Ah have decided ta reside in tha Apple Family cellar. Thar is an Apple Family Cellar, ain’t thar?”

“Well, yes.” Applejack gave Orchard Seeds an odd look. “Is that yer only reason fer choosing tha cellar?”

“Kinda sorta maybe.”

“Well, that’s all sorted out.” Twilight looked around. “Now we just have to figure out how to get them to their new homes without anypony noticing. I can teleport Swe--Chime Wonders to her room, but the other two--”

“Fastest Flyer in Equestria,” Rainbow reminded her. “Blink and you’ll miss it.”

“I can take care of Orchard!” Pinkie added, bouncing. “I know a lot of super-secret ways--”

“No breaking tha laws of time and space!” Orchard interjected.

“Okay then, I know a few super secret ways around Ponyville!”

Everypony older than ten stared at her in surprise.

“...You can break the laws of time and space?”

“Nope!” Pinkie giggled, placing a hoof on Twilight’s nose. “It’s illegal, silly filly! That’s why they’re LAAAAAAAAAWS.”

“Well At Least Some Things Are ConSisTent,” Chime Wonders observed.

“Wait, what do you...?” Twilight sighed. “You know what, forget it. I’ll ask later. Chime, get over here. I’ll drop you and Rarity off at Carousel Boutique.” The unicorns clustered together obediently, and in a flash they were gone.

Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Hey, Scoots--Skates, ride me.”

“Hey, I like you but I’m not legal.”

“Wha--?” The blue pegasus blushed furiously. “No! I mean get on my back, I’m taking you to my home! How do you even know about that stuff?!”

The filly shrugged. “With Twilight around, you learn fast.” She hopped onto the blushing Pegasus’s back, wrapping her hooves round the chest. “I could tell you about some things that--”

“Nope, not hearing this.” The two of them darted out the door at sonic speeds; a few of the ponies outside glanced up, before shrugging and returning to their lives.

Applejack rolled her eyes, turning to Orchard Seeds--and yelped in surprise as a pink visage entered her view. “Pinkie!”

“Jackie!”

“What tha hay?!”

“Are you ready for an adventure, AJ?” The party pony seemed deathly serious.

“...aren’t we supposed ta take Orchard ta tha barn cellar?”

“That’s what I was asking about,” Pinkie explained casually.

“What.”

Pinkie opened her mouth, then paused. “You know what, never mind. Better to just show you.” She grabbed the farmpony and filly, darting down into Twilight’s basement. There were some strange noises, and then silence.

Spike glanced at Fluttershy, who was still on the couch, staring at nothing. “...You okay?”

“...They thought I would kill them...”

“Hey, they think I’m a worthless freak of nature.” The dragon shrugged. “Obviously our alternates aren’t anything like us.”

The pegasus smiled at him, wrapping him in a hug. “They aren’t, are they? Thanks...”

***

“...and your room is upstairs, darling, although I suggest that you try your best to keep it as is.” The fashionista tossed her mane gently. “My parents have an unfortunate habit of dropping Sweetie Belle off at rather random intervals, and I wouldn’t want to upset her by having a random doll out of place.”

“I Will Try My Best.”

The unicorn gently mussed up the little filly’s mane and absently noted how like silk it was. “Do you need anything special? I mean, do you have any issues with water, or--?”

“Rarity!” Twilight snapped. “We shouldn’t--” Her eyes darted furtively at Chime Wonders, trying to find a way to communicate what she had to say without saying it.

“How Did You Know The WaTer Made Me FeEl FunNy?”

“Well, you are a r--”

With a flash of her horn, the scholar zipped up her friend’s lips quite literally. Ignoring the extremely offended glare from her friend, she gave the filly a smile. “Rarity and I need to have a little chitchat. Big girl talk.”

“Oh, So You Two Are Friends With BenIFits?” Chime Wonders tilted her head. “I Guess It Worked Out In This UnIVerse.”

The two adults stared at her.

“What? What Did I Say?”

“....okay, never mind, that’s Rarity’s conversation. But no, we are not. I just need to chat with her for a little bit, kay?” Twilight pushed the other unicorn into the kitchen. “You just stay there and don’t eavesdrop!” She shut the door, leaving Chime Wonders in the middle of a boutique all by herself.

This was not a unique experience.

Chime Wonders let her gaze drift around the room, idly noting the angles of the walls and measuring out various distances. Interesting... this room was exactly three point seven three two square feet larger in floorspace then its alternate in her reality. Small details like that... she didn’t know if they were comforting, knowing she’d never forget home, or if they were just a tad creepy. Maybe they could be both...

Huh. Apparently her alternate had used gemstones shaped like dragon’s scales instead of raccoon blood. That made sense, seeing as Lord Smooze had not yet touched this world. Or maybe he had and somehow...? Chime Wonders resolved to hit the history books as soon as she had an hour spare.

“Bored Now. EnGage Stealth InForMaTion GaTherIng ProToCol.” She trotted over to the door, pressing an ear against it.

“...wouldn’t understand! They have these ‘soul detecting’ machines that quote unquote prove robots don’t have souls!”

“Twilight, that makes no sense. How can a machine--?”

“I haven’t dissected one, but I’m pretty sure it just checks for organic matter. Made by the government to support their propaganda. The point is, every filly and colt has it drilled in that robots are soulless monsters that go on existential rampages. Whether or not it’s true doesn’t matter, it’s just what they believe.”

“But that hardly seems fair! Chime Wonders is a sweet little filly even if she has wires under her skin. I for one wouldn’t treat anypony, no, anybody any different no matter what they were.”

Wires? The young unicorn looked at her hooves. Did they really think she was...?

“Yes, but they would. That’s the point. That’s why we have to change them, but we can’t do that yet! Argh... you know what, remember the love poison thing?”

“Yes darling, and--”

“Shortcut to love. Didn’t work out. You want a shortcut to tolerance, and I don’t think that would end well... All I’m saying is don’t tell Chime she’s a robot yet. She’s not mature enough to handle it.”

The filly backed away from the door, staring at it in horror. No. No, that...

...that...

...explained a lot.

She stood on the model stage, looking at the mannequins. Hmm. Well. Part of her realized she was in shock, distracting herself with idle observations, but most of her was examining them for stitchwork. Maybe if she learned how they worked, she could fix her skin if the issue ever came up.

Whether or not it’s true doesn’t matter, it’s just what they believe.

I for one wouldn’t treat anypony, no, anybody any different no matter what they were.

“One Lives One’s Death, One Dies One’s Life...”

Maybe this world was better than the other one.

How did they realize I was a robot anyway? I mean in retrospect it was obvious but they had to have some sort of hint...

The two elder unicorns suddenly emerged from the kitchen. Rarity gave Twilight a somewhat reluctant glower as she left, but managed to brighten up when her eyes fell on her little sister’s alternate. “Now then! Where were we?”

“....We Were TalkIng ABout BedRooms And The AcTions TaKen By Close Friends ThereIn.” Chime Wonders smiled innocently.

The fashionista blushed slightly, but held her ground. “I must inquire as to the form of education that brought such subjects to your interest.”

“When You Do Go Back To The OTher WorLd, Read ApPleSack And CharITy.”

***

“Hey, I just realized. There’s more to you then Rainbows and Dashing.”

“Oh just now?”

“Yeah, you’re also a decent cook. My Dash can’t cook. Astigmatism.”

“Oh. Well thanks. Kid, what’s astigmatism?”

“Vision problems.”

“Oh.”

“Say, you want to have a long and dramatically revealing conversation?”

“...Not really?”

“Heh. Some things never change.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

***

“Ah still can’t believe all that’s under Ponyville,” Orchard Seeds muttered as she took a few webs out of her bow. “Ah mean them fancy electronics and all seem way outta place.”

“Well to be fair, I didn’t expect the dachshunds.” Pinkie Pie removed the big rubber shoes from her hooves, settling once more onto four legs. “If it hadn’t been for that contingent of spider kittens I might have had to pull out the big stoppers. And believe me you don’t want to do that, not without two pounds of sunscreen.” She shot a grin at the orange mare. “Still I like that somepony found a new friend out of all this.”

Applejack snorted, kicking the noodles off her flank. “Look, tha prince was a chivalrous stallion and all, and Ah’ll admit it’d have been nice but he’s really not mah type.” She took off her hat, scanning it for slime, before glancing around the Apple family cellar. “Are ya’ll sure thar wasn’t any breaking of time and space?”

“Trust me, Ah’ve seen it done. Thar wasn’t.” Orchard glanced back as Pinkie shut the hidden door; if she hadn’t known it was there, she would never have noticed it. “Er... thanks fer tha help Pinkie.”

“No problem!” The party pony bounded up the stairs. “Remember, though, this is all hush hush!”

“Ah don’t think anypony would believe it anyway,” the cowpony muttered, sliding some fermenting barrels in front of the entryway. “Strangest fourty three minutes of mah life... Maybe it’s a Discordian remnant.”

“A what now?” The filly tilted her head.

“Ya’ll don’t know what Discord is?”

“Er, an abstract concept relating ta tha utter disunion of musical notes?”

Applejack stared at her... before breaking into a smile and rustling her mane. “Don’t ya worry none about it. If it didn’t happen in yer world, yer extremely lucky.”

“Ooooookay.” Orchard Seeds raised an eyebrow. “That’s not creepy at all.”

“Ha! Trust me sugarcube, it was very creepy.” The cowpony guided her along the shelves of apples and apple accessories, grabbing a lamp and lighting it. “Now yer gonna be staying here, so try ta avoid anypony who don’t know bout ya. Ah’m gonna say you can eat some of the food down here, and Ah’ll get you some blankets and a sleep roll, but try not ta take too much. Wouldn’t do much fer the founding line of Ponyville ta be losing stock, would it?”

“Founding line?!”

“Why sure! Us apples started in Ponyville, and started up Ponyville too! Ah don’t know how it happened in yer world but--”

Orchard Seeds held up a hoof. “Right. Okay. Sure....”

Applejack peered down at her. Something seemed to be troubling the filly, and even though she wasn’t exactly her little sister she was pretty dang close. “Hey. What’s going on?”

“It’s just...” Orchard Seeds sighed. “Which of us is more real?”

“What?”

“Ah mean, is mah universe an offshoot of yers or is it tha other way round?” The little filly looked up at her. “Did Ah fall through the looking glass or did Ah crawl out tha rabbit hole?”

The orange mare wrapped her hooves around her. “Sugarcube, Ah don’ t think it’s like that at all. It’s... it’s like--”

“Like a rattlesnake?”

“What? No! It’s like an apple tree.”

“Huh?”

Applejack waved a hoof at the air. “Both our homes are apples, hanging off tha same tree. Yes, we’re a lot alike, but we’re also a lot different. And even if them differences ain’t always something Ah agree with, fact is we have the same roots. What’s happening in tha here and now, us meeting each other? That’s just, ya know, like... taking a bit of one apple and another apple and using it to make something like... a strudel.”

“So, Twilight Sparkle is making an interuniversal strudel?”

“...Yes.”

The filly snorted. “That’s a hay of a lot more comforting. But... Ah think Ah get what yer trying ta say. Thanks.”

“Yer welcome, Apple Bloom. Orchard Seeds.” Applejack shook her head. “Apple Bloom. Ah’m only gonna call ya Orchard Seeds ta mah friends, Apple Bloom is yer name and that’s what I’ll call ya to ya.”

Apple Bloom smiled, nuzzling her. “Thanks. And fer tha record, Ah wasn’t ever really sure if it was right ta be destroying those different then us.”

The two of them sat there for a moment, basking in interdimensional sisterhood.

“...So, ya got any paper?”

“Er, why?”

“Well I’m kinda hungry, but Ah’m sort of not in tha mood fer apples.”