Boast Busted: the Lost Tales

by Emeral Bookwise

Rating: everyone
Tags: Alternate Universe, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Twilight Sparkle, Random
Length: 3022

Lunaverse: Twilight lectures a group of so called "sirens".

No story is ever truly whole unto only itself, there are always details and events that go untold. This is one such tale. While searching through the Everfree forest, Twilight Sparkle encounters a musical aquatic trio, but are they really what the claim to be? Not if this unicorn has anything to say on the matter.

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-- This story is set in RainbowDoubleDash's Lunaverse, and details an off-screen encounter that took place during the events of Boast Busted.
-- Art elements modified from source material by DeviantTy and my own shoddy screen cap work.

Published 2012-06-12 19:44:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-06-12 19:44:02 UTC

3.4: Crazy Little Things Called 'Sirens'

The early night was dark, and beneath the shadows and the twisted gnarled trees of the Everfree Forest, where the stars and moon could not reach, it was even darker. It was through this darkness that crept a single beacon, a vibrant magenta glow projected by a unicorn's horn as its lavender coated owner made a slow but deliberate pace through the foliage and underbrush.

Every so often the mare would stop, point her horn forward, and then swing her head from left to right and back again as though searching out which direction triggered a greater response before resuming her march.

Twilight Sparkle was a unicorn on a mission, a quest, a crusade and somewhere in this forest laid the answer that would solve all of her problems. Soon she would be able to prove her worth, face down this trial, and pass the test. Yes, the test, Twilight was good at tests; she never failed, and tonight would be no different. She just had to find the…

It was then that she heard, something, and paused briefly, as her ears twitched about attempting to discern the sound. It wasn't any sound she would have expected from her intended mark or any other beasts of the forest. No, this was something different, musical, song-like, hauntingly beautiful even. Twilight didn't care. She had only a singular goal on this night. Nothing would distract her and so she resumed her steady trudge.

Yet as she made her way over the muddy and moss carpeted ground, weaving between trees and ducking branches that tore at her increasingly disheveled blue and purple striped mane, the sound only grew louder and more insistent. She paused, once again lowering her horn and turning her head to check the path, "Well it's along the same route," she said to herself, "No harm in sparing a few moments to investigate while I'm here."

As she made her way further along she could start to make out words, lyrics rather. Something was definitely singing.

…please oh please, don’t decline … come and dance on the river’s bed…

Well it wasn't quite singing. Twilight was no musical expert, but she tried to keep herself well read on a wide variety of subject matters. Magic was her talent, her passion, her life, but any good scholar needed to maintain a well-rounded foundation of more general knowledge, to suitably converse with others of high education if nothing else. No, this wasn't proper song, not as defined by modern standards at least, more like the steady rhythmic beating of a pre-classical Cavallian chant.

She actually preferred such as compared to more contemporary works. Not only was its value to the arts backed by centuries of academic study and acknowledgement, but its evenly measured rhythmic pace was decidedly sensible, not at all like the blaring cacophonic gyrations of modern so-called musical artists. Ha! This was proper art, precise and categorical. Twilight made a mental note that she would have to try her hoof at writing a Cavallian chant one day. It would be a good meditative excise to practice between her other studies.

…come on in, the water’s fine … please oh please, don’t decline…

As she drew closer to the chant's source, the lyrics became ever clearer and Twilght could now also make out the sound of running water, a river of some kind. Now that she heard it clearly she wasn't sure how she had missed it before, until she also noticed the chant was timed evenly with the water's steady flow, the two distinct sounds blending into a unified whole.

Twilight was actually becoming quite eager to meet whatever talent was behind this masterpiece, and so picked up her pace. She even allowed her original purpose in coming to the forest to slip to the back of her mind, not forgotten, but less insistent.

…come and dance on the river’s bed … come on in and join the dead…

Okay, that last part was a little morbid, she thought to herself as she slowed to a stop. Then again, wasn't good art supposed to be moody? Were not so many of the classic epic tales tragedies? Of course, that's all it was. Even in a place as unnatural as the Everfree, full of so many monsters, a thing of such refinement couldn't possibly bear any real malice. Besides, even if it did, no mere beast of the night was a match for Twilight Sparkle and her mastery of the arcane arts.

Taking a deep breath she stepped out and into the clearing that the river had cut through the forest, calling out hesitantly, "H… Hello?"

All was still and silent for a moment. Before her, Twilight saw a trio of aquatic equines basking in the river's cool waters beneath the moon light. Instead of furry coats they had scales, and where a pony would have a mane these creatures instead had fins, with similar fins attached to their fore-hooves, while their hindquarters seemed to taper off into a fish-like tail beneath the water. Although they were each a slightly different shade of green, and other than the fact that one had a stallion-like build while the other two were more mare-like, their most individually distinguishing characteristic was their brightly colored-eyes; teal for the first, yellow and red for the other two.

The trio made no immediate reply, instead only staring back and forth amongst each other before resuming their chant.

Come on in, the water’s fine … please oh please, don’t decline
Come and dance on the river’s bed … come on in and join the dead

Twilight smiled gently "My, that really is a nice chant. A bit dreary maybe, but poetically insightful."

Again silence was her only response, then the one with red-eyes turned to her compatriots, "It's not my fault this time. My harmony has been spot on for weeks. Even if this is another musical pony our song should work perfectly."

"Well if it's not you than what is it?" spoke the yellow-eyed creature in a critical tone.

Red-eyes snapped a harshly defensive reply, "How should I know! Maybe you're the one who's screwing up this time?"

"As if!" blared yellow-eyes, "You're just trying to make excuses to cover your own shoddy voice work."

"Pipe down both of you." The teal-eyed creature interjected as it swam between the two, "I've got a much simpler way to figure this out." Then turning to Twilight gave a shout, "Hey, you! Unicorn. So why exactly is our siren song not working on you?"

Twilight wasn't sure she liked the implications of what the three were discussing, but couldn't resist the urge to show off a bit, "Oh, that's easy. I'd have to be pretty stupid to go hiking in someplace as dangerous as the Everfree Forest without casting a few basic protective wards.

Teal-eyes gave a satisfied nod then turned back to his compatriots, "See you two, it's no one's fault. This unicorn is just using magic to protect herself."

Getting a bit frustrated with having twice now been referred to dismissively as unicorn, Twilight coughed to catch the trio's attention "Ahem, I have a name. It's Twilight Sparkle, and—"

"Like we care what our dinner's name is," interrupted red-eyes, but then paused before continuing, "Though I guess with whatever those spells you cast, you're off the menu. Now why don't you just run along so we can get back to our siren song before we starve," and finished with a dismissive wave of a finned hoof.

Twilight was definitely getting uncomfortable with being treated as a literal hunk of meat, but with her wards in place and the trio water-bound she knew she was safe enough. Besides, there was something nagging at her that she had to assert, "Yeah about that actually. If you'll beg my pardon, it's not really accurate to call it a siren song, now is it?"

"What do you mean?" said yellow-eyes with a raised eyebrow and mild irritation at the edge of her voice, "Of course it's a siren song. We're sirens and that's our song, simple as that."

Now Twilight grinned as she straightened her posture and took a properly informative tone, "Well first off it was more of a chant, not quite Cavallian, but similar enough."

"Great," drawled red-eyes sarcastically, "it is another music pony."

"Who me?" came Twilight's somewhat sheepish reply, "No, I dabble in a bit of everything, but my real talent is magic," and as if to prove it, she turned slightly to show off her starburst cutie mark.

"What, you mean that freaky tattoo fetish you ponies have is actually supposed to mean something?"

"Well it's not a tattoo. They're called cutie marks and—"

"Sorry," red-eyes interrupted again in a tone that conveyed very much the opposite, "Don't care. Now then, since you clearly don't know what you're talking about, why don't you leave it to us professionals to decide whether what we do is chanting or singing," then gave another dismissive wave.

"Well, I kind of doubt that any of you have an actual degree in the musical arts," Twilight groused, "But fine, whatever. Call it singing if that makes you happy. The real problem is that you aren't sirens."

Teal-eyes' head cocked sideways a bit, "Come again?"

"You. Are not. Sirens," she repeated with extra emphasis.

"Oh great, now she's a zoologist," red droned as she rolled her eyes.

"Probably another ignoramus that thinks we're seaponies," added yellow-eyes now very obviously annoyed and agitated, "I'll tell you what we told the last nutter who tried telling us that. This here is fresh water and we're certainly no herbivores."

Ignoramus, nutter, Twilight would show them. She had a point to prove after all, "No, of course not," then she proceeded in an escalating lecturous tone, "You are most certainly not seaponies, or more accurately, you aren't any variety of hippocampus which would also include merponies as well. Notably, while aquatic, hippocampus still have mammalian qualities. Also, while hippocamps do prefer saltwater, they have been known to form freshwater colonies in larger lakes."

"Don't know where you get your info lady," quipped yellow-eyes, "but we've seen Hippos before, they live down south in zebra territory."

"Oh yeah, during our summer vacation two years back?" added red-eyes while licking her lips, "Those were some good eats; felt stuffed for weeks after that," then she rolled back to stroke her belly.

"That's not what she said," teal-eyes interjected, "She means those pony-griffin half-breeds."

"Mmm… some griffin would taste good about now too," red declared with a toothy grin and hunger in her eyes.

"Wow, no. You're all wrong," proclaimed Twilight, then glancing at red-eyes, "Except you. You're just creepy." This conversation was getting decidedly more awkward by the minute, but she couldn't just leave without first enlightening these poor deluded creatures.

"First of all," she said looking at yellow-eyes, "What you were trying to refer to is the hippopotamus. Second," she turned to teal-eyes, "You were talking about hippogriffs. What I said was hippocampus, the technical term for the tribes of aquatic ponies. They all sound the same because hippo is an archaic term meaning horse-like, though it's something of a misnomer in regards to hippopotamus. Actually, it's kind of funny, seeing as their name means river horse, which would have otherwise been better name for what the three of you—"

"Alright fine." said the yellow-eyed creature as she cut Twilight off bluntly, "So what if seaponies have a fancier name? We all seem to agree that's not what we are anyway; so if you already know we aren't seaponies, what makes you so certain we aren't sirens?"

"Well, according to historical records the Sirens were three beautiful, but dangerous creatures, who had the power to charm ponies with their music."

"Three of them, three of us, and they charm through song too; not seeing the problem," said the teal-eyed creature with bored disinterest.

Twilight fixed her gaze firmly on him as she further appended, "Yes, but that wouldn't account for you being male."

"Right," drolled yellow-eyes sarcastically, "The all sirens are girls crud," then with dull exasperation, "Like we haven't heard that one before. How would breeding even work that way?"

"They didn't need to breed; they were immortals… well, sort of. It was said that to maintain their power, the Sirens had to feed on the negativity and distrust of others. The more of this negative energy they consumed, the stronger their voices became, and the farther they could spread their dark magic."

"Alright then," sneered red-eyes, "But if these supposed sirens of yours were so powerful, how come we ain't never heard of them?"

"That was just a double negative," Twilight corrected. "Anyway, it's not really surprising you've never heard of them though. Their existence largely faded into myth and legend after they were defeated and banished by Starswirl the Bearded over a thousand years ago."

"Hmph… Seems to me that if all these real sirens you keep blathering about aren't around anymore, then there's no reason we can't be the new sirens," teal-eyes grinned then pressed, "Besides, if you've never seen them with your own eyes, exactly how can you know they ever even existed in the first place?"

Twilight simply beamed with pride as she answered, "Books!"

"Books can be wrong," yellow-eyes jeered in a cheeky tone.

Twilight stared in wide-eyed shock, gave a single twitch of her right ear, and then grit her teeth as she issued a deadly rasp, "Not my books!" She could feel it, an inferno welling up deep inside her, an emotion that threatened to transcend and make itself physically manifest. How easy it would be to just give into that sensation, to watch these creatures burn, but… no.

These were just poor ignorant souls living in the untamed wilds of the Everfree. They understood not the wretched blasphemy they spoke, and she… she was Twilight Sparkle. She would not incinerate, no; she would educate, and with that the storm past as quickly as it had begun allowing her to regain her composure as though she had never lost it. A single hoof reached absently to snuff out a small flame at one of the frayed tips of her mane. She then proceeded in a chipper tone, "I've made sure to double and triple check the citation sources for every last book in my collection to ensure authorial accuracy."

"Alright then miss smarty pants," sneered the yellow-eyed creature, "If we aren't sirens or seaponies than what exactly is it you think we are?"

"That's easy," came Twilight's matter of fact reply, "Kelpies."

"What?" red-eyes barked out with a laugh, "Okay, now I know this unicorn's daft. She thinks we're seaweeds."

"That's kelp moron," chided yellow-eyes as she mimed slapping her compatriot upside the head, "But she's still a loon."

"Whatever," red-eyes griped, "As fun as this little chat has been, it's done nothing for my appetite. Now why don't you just go back to wherever you came from and leave us to our thing."

"Actually I have something to find on the other side of this river."

With that all three sets of eyes lit up with wicked glee as they each flashed a sharp toothy grin.

"Well why didn't you say so in the first place," stated yellow-eyes eagerly.

"Yeah," red-eyes agreed with obvious exuberance, "Would have saved us all so much time and effort."

Finally teal-eyes declared, "Guess the only thing left is for you to give it a swim."

"Right," came Twilight's protracted response, "What kind of fool do you take me for?"

Red-eyes licked her chops, "The tasty kind, I hope."

Twilight narrowed her gaze as she gave a harsh, but mostly deadpan retort, "I don't think so."

"So what then?" quizzed teal-eyes, "Think you can fight your way past us?"

"Might want to reconsider," yellow-eyes cautioned with obviously false concern, "We've kinda got you outnumbered."

"But please don't let us talk you out of it," concluded red-eyes.

"Oh, I think I'll manage," and with that the unicorn began to charge her horn, its glow increasing from a dull magenta to an almost fiery white.

At the same time the trio begin to hum in harmony, as they prepared their own musical magic to counter the unicorn's attack. Both the whites and blacks of their eyes faded away, leaving the sockets filled only with solid colored orbs that began to faintly glow. The very water about them began to bubble, churn and rise about them, lifting them upwards with it.

Tension mounted in the air as both sides seemed to prepare for the inevitable clash, until

*POP*

With a sudden flash of light the unicorn vanished, gone from sight as though she had never been there to begin with. The trio blinked, their eyes quickly returning to normal, as they ceased their harmony. While the water around them settled back into the river, they looked confusedly between each other.

"What, where'd she go!?" demanded red-eyes.

"Well, it's been fun," came the unicorn's voice, but now from behind. The trio turned and to their combined utterly disappointed astonishment they saw their prey, now safely on the opposite bank, "But I really do have to get moving."

As the pony disappeared past the treeline and into darkness, the sirens turned to look at each other.

"Well that went swimmingly," groused yellow-eyes.

"So, what now?" intoned red-eyes with more than a bit of a grumble, "I'm still hungry."

"Let's go upstream," teal-eyes suggested, "See if Steven's got any good scraps."

Red-eyes looked a bit disappointed but conceded, "Well it's better than starving."

As they swam off, teal-eyes asked, "So either of you actually buy any of what that unicorn was saying?"

"Heck no!" yellow-eyes trumpeted, "What do ponies know anyway?"

"Yeah, they'd be useless," started red-eyes who then flashed a razor edged smile as she finished, "If it weren't for how tasty they are."

With that, all three enjoyed a round of shared laughter before swimming in earnest off and into the night.