Where There is Smoke

Chapters

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6

Chapter 1

Corona was walking.

She could hardly believe it herself. To be reduced to this! Sadly there was no other way as she was still too weak from her recent defeat to teleport her minions around, and she didn’t dare leave behind the only support she had in this world to be devoured by roaming beasts. As feeble as the zebra was, she still knew her way around this dastardly Everfree Forest, and her humble hidden home had been covered with enough wards that even Luna had failed to find her in her moment of weakness. The baby dragon wasn’t much, and he certainly could use a lesson in loyalty from his striped friend, but he made for a decent beatstick should the need arise.

Now Celestia felt much better than in the direct aftermath of her defeat, and yet too weak to risk any major confrontation. Still, the zebra’s hut was too small for a Queen such as herself, as such she required new lodging, and that is what they intended to claim with this little walk. Up ahead, visible through the thick foliage and undergrowth, was a large cave on the side of a rocky peak, large enough that she could set herself a worthy throne as she waited for her power to recover. Maybe even carve the entire stone formation into a grand palace celebrating her glory.

“I really don’t think this is a good idea Z,” whispered Spike, unaware that the alicorn walking ahead of them could hear him.

“Do not fear little scaly one, our Queen’s power you mustn’t question,” replied Zecora in her usual rhyming style.

“But that guy is huge!” said the baby dragon, spreading his arm as wide as possible.

“Size will not matter, if the Sun he does anger.”

“Quiet!” ordered Corona, turning to face her two minions with anger etched on her regal face. “Minions should not be heard, unless your Queen requires it!”

Zecora and Spike jumped in fright and they both bowed silently. The rest of the walk toward the cave was done in a blissful silence. Finally they entered the large cave, a strong aroma of sulfur assailing their noses as they made their way further inside. They soon came in front of a ridiculously large hoard of riches. Gold, silver, jewels of all kinds, all piled up into a mound taller than Corona herself.

The ponies had shunned her favorite metal, gold, in favor of Luna’s silver, but there were still plenty of species in the world that appreciated gold. Dragons were in general big fans of it. A dragon needs to eat gems, and the magic contained within, to feed themselves, but gold and silver were amassed mostly out of sheer greed, altough in a pinch a dragon could eat any mineral to survive. Greed was a powerful impulse with dragons, and when it went unchecked it causes them to become horrible greedy beasts that grow in size alongside their hoard.

Corona looked upon the pile of loot with a smile. The gold would be used to fashion her a worthy throne, while the gems and silver could be used to bribe those pathetic mortal nobles so she could pester Luna from the shadows during her recovery. All she needed to do was take care of the owner of that hoard. An owner who was slowly waking up from his nap on top of said hoard.

The large red dragon’s nostrils twitched as he took in the strange scents of the alicorn, zebra, and baby dragon. His eyes snapped open and he sat on his haunches, staring angrily at the intruders.

“This is my cave! My hoard! Get out!” he bellowed, in a loud rumbling voice.

Corona’s wings flared dramatically and she floated up, holding her head at an height that allowed her to look down upon the giant beast.

“We are Celestia! We are the Sun! We are thy Queen! Bow!” she declared stoically.

The dragon glared back at her defiantly, obviously annoyed at the goddess. He snorted once, shooting a plume of dark smoke right into Corona’s face and she began coughing loudly. Her coughing was halted when a large, red, clawed hand swatted her out of the air, ramming her with the force of twenty charging buffalos. The alicorn was sent flying into the nearby cave wall, her loud impact causing the stone to crack. She landed flat on the ground, to twin gasps from her two minions. The alicorn laid motionless for five agonizing seconds before her eyes snapped open again, full of fury and scorn.

“We were ready to show thee mercy, to welcome thee to our employ,” she said, standing up slowly. “Thou darest lay thy filthy mortal hands upon thy goddess? Then mortal hands shall be thy downfall!”

Corona’s horn began to shine brightly, illuminating every dark corner of the cave. The display was somewhat impressive, but not the brightest Zecora had seen from her Queen. The Zebra could guess that she was preparing a spell of great power, but that she was also struggling. Beads of sweat were beginning of roll down Corona’s face when Zecora realized what that spell was. Spike also realized what it was.

“Oh no! Please no no no no! Anything but that! No!”

Zecora ducked out of the way quickly as the spell flew from Corona’s horn. Her quick movement sent the baby dragon flying off her back. He comically did a few spins in the air before he was hit by the beam and engulfed in light. The red dragon, who, so far, had only watched the display with mild curiosity, was suddenly taken by surprise when a fist, much bigger than his own, seem to grow from the light and deliver a powerful uppercut to his face. The red dragon was spent sprawling backward into his pile of loot. Disoriented he looked up and his eyes grew twice their size, terror appearing on his face.

Before him stood the artificially aged baby dragon from earlier. Fully powered by the greed Corona would constantly deny having, the purple dragon now stood at least two head taller than the red one. Furthermore, his eyes, devoid of any spark of intelligence, spoke of nothing but violence and anger. With a roar, Spike threw himself at the other dragon.

Zecora watched the fight with a strange mix of awe, fascination, and horror. With each powerful hit from Spike she winced, and with each of the red dragon’s cries of pain she flinched.

“Ooh that is a most brutal spectacle, it makes my blood curdle!” she said, as her Queen walked up to her.

A loud cracking noise echoed through the chamber, and both Corona and Zecora quickly stepped aside just before a large piece of the red dragon’s horn landed between them.

“Impressive,” conceded Corona, appreciation in her voice.

Another series of impact and roars brought Zecora’s attention back to the fight. Corona brought up a shield of radiant light just in time to block a stray splatter of draconic blood. Zecora, however, was left defenseless and found hersely sprayed in red. She stood stock still, shocked and surprised.

After a second she finally spoke. “I can taste it in my mouth.”

Corona eyed her servant with curiosity. The lack of rhyming was rather surprising and she was waiting to see how the zebra would follow through. Much to the alicorn’s surprise the zebra just turned around and began to vomit behind a rock.

Meanwhile the red dragon’s howls of pain had turn to whimper as he begged his assailant to stop. Finally, tired of this game, the giant Spike grabbed hold of his bloodied opponent and with a mighty heave threw him out the cave entrance. The unmistakable sound of cracking wood filled the air as the red dragon crashed through the trees outside. That was soon followed by the sound of a fleeting dragon. The purple dragon roared in triumph just as light engulfed him, leaving behind a baby dragon sleeping in a pool of his victim’s blood.

“Thou shall clean this cave and your companion, once thou have finished relieving thyself of thy lunch” Corona ordered, looking back at Zecora. “And go bathe thyself too, thou reek!”

The alicorn began to pace around the cave, admiring the various pieces of her new treasure, and already planning where her throne would be. The cave wasn't bad for a temporary lair, and it would be better once there was a few more holes to let light from the sun flood in, and a few drapes wouldn't hurt either.

As she did so she began to think out loud. “Our draconic minion was most impressive, however he is not a dependable asset, merely the best tool in an empty tool box. I need someone else to go and hassle those accursed corrupted Element wielders! Someone I can count on,” she said, before stopping in front of a gold plate being used to hold bright red rubies.

The colors reflected in her eyes and a malevolent smile spread across the mad alicorn’s face.

“Yes! She must still be alive… Luna sealed her off somewhere and I must free her. I need her. I need Philomena!”

Zecora let out a squeal of surprise as she slipped on a puddle of blood and ended up falling backward into the different puddle she had left behind that rock.

Corona flinched at the scene. “Ew!”

My little pony, My little pony
Ahh ahh ahh ahhh...
My little pony
Friendship never meant that much to me
My little pony
But you're all here and now I can see
Stormy weather; Lots to share
A musical bond; With love and care
Teaching laughter; It's an easy feat,
And magic makes it all complete!
You have my little ponies
How'd I ever make so many true friends?

The humid air of the jungle was alive with the sound of critters, birds, and the thunderous roar of the nearby waterfall. Life was simply everywhere in this sea of green, regardless of the oppressive humidity and harsh heat. However all that life seem to suddenly scurry away in fear, leaving nothing but the sound of the waterfall to breach the silence.

Corona, the Tyrant Sun, landed on the rock outcropping overlooking the pool at the bottom of the waterfall. The mad alicorn’s eyes were back to being blank but her mane had yet to recover its flaming quality just yet. She surveyed the scene, noting that it was exactly as the information she had obtained said it was. Those had been well-spent silver coins, and it had given her something to do during these last few months.

An isolated southern valley, a rocky cliff, and a waterfall falling into a moon crescent shaped pond surrounded by trees adorned with strange blue fruits. Were those supposed to be bananas? And of course the air was as humid as she had been led to believe. Nothing could catch on fire under normal circumstances. The presence of Celestia, the Sun herself, was not a normal circumstance. She began walking toward the waterfall following a rocky path. When she was close enough that she could step behind it, the water seemed to recoil at her very presence and allowed the self-proclaimed Queen to walk into the hidden cave beyond without getting her mane wet.

At the end of a dark, gloomy and wet tunnel, laying in a shallow recess of the rock filled with water, stood a bronze box with symbols dating back to the time Luna and Celestia ruled together. This box was yet another reminder of Celestia’s past, and the profound betrayal of her misguided little sister.

“Thou hast rest long enough. Awaken, our servant! Wreck havoc in our name! Burn away our enemies in thy flames! Rise from your ashes once more, Philomena!” said Corona, her horn shining like the sun.

In a flash all humidity in the dreary cave was eliminated, the walls and floor turning as dry as they would be in the desert. The powerful hoof of Corona shattered the bronze box, and it erupted into flames almost immediately. Corona let out a hearty laugh as the whole cave was engulfed in bright flames.

“Make haste, faithful servant! May thy flames deliver burning vengeance upon the fools who defied us! Hear our will Philomena: may Ponyville be consumed by thy ravenous fire!” she declared, between two bouts of maniacal laughter.

This was going to be glorious. Of this Corona held no doubt.

Trixie exited town hall with a beaming smile on her face, an expression not shared by Pokey Pierce - her assistant - who was following her. The administrative assistant to the Representative of the Night Court of Luna was carrying a pair of saddlebags decorated in the same pattern as Trixie’s cape and hat, and sported an expression of pure boredom.

Trixie trotted ahead happily before turning toward her assistant. “I can’t believe they finally asked for my help breaking a tie on a city council vote!”

“Yeah, you have to wonder how they could manage before the Great and Powerful Trixie came to town,” replied the unicorn stallion.

Trixie frowned and resumed walking, her smile slowly returning. “Hush you! It’s the first time I got to exercise that particular executive power! It feels…exhilarating to have an impact on everypony’s life! It feels like I’m truly part of Ponyville’s political landscape now!”

“Yes! I’m sure that your decisive vote on the question of whether the next official flyer would be blue or green will be celebrated for years to come. Should I frame our copy of the city council reunion transcript?” he asked with so much simulated genuine enthusiasm that it took Trixie a second or two to realize he was being sarcastic.

“No,” said Trixie, frowning again, “however I want you to make me two hoof written copy and put it in a special folder so I can keep a record of all the times I’ll have an impact on the city council.”

“You’re just saying that to give me more work,” said Pokey, before snickering a little, “I must have poked a sore spot if you feel the need to point out your relevance to me.”

Trixie brought a hoof to her face. “That was just terrible! Sometimes I wonder why I even put up with you.”

“Maybe because you know you’d have to hire someone else if you fired me? Maybe because you know you’re a terribly demanding boss and only somepony as perseverant as me would stay longer than a week? Maybe because you had my background checked and you are one hundred percent certain I’m not currently plotting your demise alongside some shady Night Court noble. Currently,” said Pokey, with a genuine smile, snickering as he added that last part.

Trixie rolled her eyes “Maybe we should take this act on the road, we could make a killing at vaudeville.”

Pokey’s eyebrows jumped high in surprise and he stopped walking. “And share the spotlight with little old me? Who are you, and what have you done with the Representative?” he asked, pointing an accusing hoof at Trixie.

“Of course I’d still get top billing,” said Trixie, putting her hoof to her chest in mock offense. “Now enough fooling around. Let’s head back to the office and finish up for the day.”

The two unicorns continued to head toward the residency, Trixie falling into silence as Pokey began to tell a long and convoluted story. Thankfully for Trixie, something was about to come up that would afford her some freedom from all that rambling.

“…And then I said ‘I’m not, and don’t call me Oatmeal’! It was hilarious,” said Pokey before breaking into a hearty laugh.

Trixie was about to thank Luna the story was over before a voice resounded over Ponyville.

“The horror! The horror!” cried out a familiar voice.

“This is horrible! Horrible!” came a second voice

“Everything is burning away! Somepony help!” continued the third voice.

The two unicorns turned into the direction of the cries, a small puff of cloud was escaping from behind a nearby building. Trixie looked at Pokey Pierce and the stallion nodded, much to Trixie’s confusion.

“This looks serious, for a change. Let’s go boss!” said Pokey, galloping toward the smoke.

Trixie blinked multiple times, looking between the cloud and the spot her assistant used to occupy. “Oh! You mean we should… Hey! wait for me!”

And with that she took off after the stallion.

Chapter 2

Raindrops was smiling.

Trixie could hardly believe it. Not a smirk, or a sneer, but a smile. Not ironic, or sarcastic, but a genuine grin. It was the kind of grin that would make Pinkie Pie break out into song, and then parade down the street so you would only catch half of what she sang. The jasmine-coated pegasus was currently bouncing up and down on a dark rain cloud a few feet off the ground, sending a torrent of water flooding the little garden space below her.

That little front yard garden space also served as a display area for Daisy’s flower shop. Right now, though, it wasn’t a very good marketing tool. Not only was it now flooded, but there was a large circle of carbonized flower remains.

“Huh…I think you can stop now, Raindrops.” Said Trixie, feeling a bit apprehensive about interrupting Raindrops’ fun.

The pegasus’ stopped bouncing, shutting off the rain, and almost immediately her grin dissolved away. She then slumped down on the cloud and looked at the scene below her with a neutral expression. Raindrops the stoic was back, and Trixie allowed herself a small sigh of relief. Seeing her friend getting emotional like that was somehow unnerving, but she had been even more worried about how it would end. Happy she wasn’t going to get hit by the pegasus again, the unicorn then turned to the Flower Trio.

Daisy, Rose, and Lilly spent so much time together that many in Ponyville wondered if they were sister, and as such everypony referred to the three of them as the ‘Flower Trio’. Daisy operated a flower shop, mostly decorative flowers but a few comestible ones as well, and she had her associated with her old friend Lilly, who ran a flower farm, to sell her product. Lilly’s specialty was being a fantastic flower breeder; capable of obtaining the right mixes of characteristics in a flower. Problem was she wasn’t that good at taking care of fragile and finicky flowers, and she tended to over-water her crop. That’s where Rose came in, with her talent to nurture flowers, to help shore up Lilly’s weaknesses. Finally Daisy created the best flower arrangements this side of Canterlot. The three had a decent amount of success and were well regarded in Ponyville for their beautiful products.

They were also infamous for their melodramatic tendencies. Right now Rose was fanning Lilly who had fainted mere moments before Trixie and Pokey had reached the scene.

“So, let me get this straight,” began Trixie, quoting the police chief from one of the mystery novels she enjoyed, “you came back from lunch and found that your front garden was now on fire?”

“Oh by the sweet glare of the moon, yes! Our beautiful flowers, engulfed in an inferno! It was like Corona was back to reduce us all to cinders!” said Daisy, tears forming at the edge of her eyes.

“The world is burning! Burning!” shouted Lilly, suddenly waking up.

“It’s okay Lilly, it’s over now,” said Rose, soothing her friend.

This, somehow, didn’t calm the excited mare “Oh no! It’s all over! Over!”

“She means the fire’s taken care of,” said Raindrops from her cloud, a bored expression on her face.

“Oh,” simply said Lilly, getting up and smiling at the pegasus. “That’s good then. Thank you Miss Raindrops.”

The pegasus waved it off “No problem.”

“What do you think caused this fire?” asked Pokey, who was studying the perfect round shape of burnt flowers in the soaked garden. “Did you girls hear or see anything?”

Daisy replied in the negative while Lilly and Rose looked at each other before simply shaking their heads. The unicorn stallion’s brow furrowed as he rubbed his chin with a hoof.

“It better not be Rainbow Dash up to her old tricks again,” said Raindrops, an edge to her voice.

“Well if they didn’t hear anything it can’t be a lightning strike that caused it,” commented Trixie.

“There’s no way you can set fire to fresh plants with a simple match,” added Pokey, pointing a hoof at the garden. “You would need a dry plant for it to catch on fire like that. Or use some sort of fuel, like cooking oil. I don’t see any sign of that.”

His boss nodded in agreement, “The only explanation left I can think of is a fire spell. That is, unless Corona did come back, except she was now one apple tall.”

“The miniature Tyrant Sun is stalking us!” declared Lilly, almost fainting again.

Even Rose and Daisy rolled their eyes at her over dramatic display.

“I’m pretty sure she was joking,” said Rose.

“And even there, the Great and Powerful Trixie would protect you from the Tyrant Sun.” declared the unicorn.

The lone stallion at the scene turned to Trixie. “Why don’t you cast your magic detection spell on the garden and see if there’s any residual energy left! That is if you can see anything with your giant ego in the way.”

Trixie closed her eyes and concentrated. The blue glow of her magic started to coalesce around her horn before it suddenly flashed, momentarily blinding the ponies around her. When she opened her eyes they were pools of blue light rather than her usual violet orbs. This was the first spell Princess Luna had thought to her student. This spell allowed Trixie to see magic. All kinds of magic, not just unicorn magic like a mundane detect magic spell would. Princess Luna had explained to Trixie that the world was filled with all sorts of magic, and limiting one self to only one kind was a waste of efforts.

“The garden is flooded with magic… but not unicorn magic,” began Trixie “There is earth pony magic in the flowers left untouched and the water is literally bursting with residual pegasus magic… seriously Raindrops, you impress me! Sadly it’s overtaking any residual magic that might be left.”

Pokey looked even more confused and in concentration than before as he spoke up, “What a mystery.”

Raindrops chuckled a little, attracting the attention of the pair of unicorns. “You two are enjoying this aren’t you? You’re acting like a couple of detectives!”

“It’s his fault,” said the blushing Representative, pointing an accusing hoof at her assistant “He was reading on his break and he got me hooked on a new detective novel series!”

“Which reminds me, the library should have the new Ace of Clover in!” said Pokey with a smile that turned into a smirk. “But I already reserved it so you’ll have to wait until I’m done with it to get a stab at it yourself!”

Trixie glared at her assistant and was about to say something when another chuckle from Raindrops broke her out of it. She coughed a little to regain her composure and leveled a friendly gaze at the Flower Trio.

“Raindrops has a point though: it’s not really our job to investigate this. In the meantime I’ll fill a form you can use if you want to file an insurance claim.”

“No you won’t,” stated the stallion, earning himself a scornful look that he pointedly ignored. “Mostly because I’ve already done so.”

A piece of paper flew over to Daisy, carried in the silvery glimmer of Pokey’s telekinesis. He gave her a smile. She thanked him and grabbed hold of the form.

Trixie blinked in surprise “Where did you get that form?”

The stallion shrugged “Saddlebags. When we go out I make it a point to carry a copy of every form from the red book.”

“You mean the book about disaster relief? Every form?” asked an incredulous Trixie.

“I’m working for you. In Ponyville. I wouldn’t be very sharp if I didn’t carry forms to deal with sudden floods, fires and twenty six flavors of magical mayhems.”

Trixie groaned.

When Trixie and Pokey got back to the Residency they found a beige unicorn stallion with a green mane and a bowler hat waiting for them on the front porch. The unicorn was wearing a very formal business shirt and had a small briefcase set down beside him, one that matched the one found on each of his flank. His expression was a careful mix of boredom, exasperation and professional calm, the kind that screamed of a Canterlot bureaucrat. Trixie felt a bit apprehensive as she walked up to him, assistant in tow.

The unicorn took in her garish hat and cape with a slight twitch of his eyebrow “Representative Lulamoon I presume?”

“Yes… and you are?”

“I am inspector Serious Audit.” Explained the unicorn, flashing a piece of ID with his telekinesis. “I am here on behalf of the Royal Equestrian Public Safety Commission.”

To say Trixie was surprised by the visit was an understatement.

She gestured to Pokey behind her as she went to unlock her door. “Well Inspector Audit, this is my administrative assistant, Pokey Pierce. We just returned from a meeting at town hall where I was needed to break a tie. I’m sorry we left you waiting, I’m normally in at such time of the day.”

Serious Audit did a polite nod as greeting to Pokey before he followed Trixie into the residency “Well if you were held up by official duties there is no reason to apologize Representative Lulamoon.”

“Trixie please,” she said, cringing slightly.

“We got mail while we were away,” pointed out Pokey, dropping a pair of sealed scrolls on Trixie’s desk while they all settled down.

Trixie glanced at them and noticed the blue sealing wax and seal on the first of the two, inwardly groaning when she realized who had sent it. The second one had the more common red wax and a very generic seal she had never seen before, indicating that whoever had sent it might wish to remain anonymous. She decided to worry about it after she was done with her visitor.

“So what brings you all the way out to Ponyville Inspector Audit?” she asked with a smile, trying to sound as friendly as possible.

Serious Audit took in the décor of Trixie’s office without saying a word or cracking a smile before he turned toward her. “The commission is concerned with the number of requests coming from Ponyville since you’ve taken this post. We understand that Ponyville was the epicenter of the Tyrant Sun’s releases so extra relief was to be expect… but then after the events of the Longest Night celebration you have done quite a lot of requests. Flooding during Winter Wrap Up, Parasprite infestation, an Ursa Minor attack and a lot of nebulous ‘everfree weather’ incidents regarding wild weather patterns. I’m here to inspect your own file as well as the paperwork of City Hall for any irregularities, and if I find them, to solve the problem.”

“We’ve had our shares of incident it’s true but it’s not that enormous. A lot of those requests were for small time damage and a lot of those were already partially covered by private insurance.” Said Trixie, feeling a bit small before the stoic gaze of the inspector.

“Let’s cut the tap dance, Inspector. Basically you’re accusing Trixie here, or Mayor Mare, or both, of cheating the system and putting the money to fraudulent use,” said Pokey. “Frankly I’m surprised you guys didn’t show up sooner.”

Trixie gasped “Pokey!”

Once again the only thing betraying emotions on Audit’s stern face was a slight twitch of his eyebrow “Suspect, yes, accuse, not yet. This would hardly be a new caper and so that possibility must be considered. Your assistant likes to get to the heart of the matter, Representative Lulamoon. It’s a quality that is certainly worth excusing his rather obvious insubordinate streak.”

“I make it a point of honor to always pierce through to the core of a matter,” the stallion replied, returning to making that copy of the meeting transcript for Trixie.

“In any case, I will be staying in town for a few days and I hope to have your full cooperation in resolving this embarrassing matter,” said the beige stallion, standing up. “Now if you’ll excuse me I still need to speak to Mayor Ivory Scroll and secure some lodging.”

“Of course Inspector! I’ll do everything to make your job quick and effective! As for lodging, they’re working on building Ponyville’s first motel and I believe the finished half of the building is open for business. Otherwise the city hall has a room set aside just for such official visits,” explained Trixie, escorting the inspector out.

When the door closed she let out a sigh. She wasn’t all that happy about that turn of event, and Pokey was right that the commission would eventually take notice of Ponyville. Especially since that was where the Elements of Harmony lived. Pokey’s insolence was refreshing at time but when official visit was in town it turned out to be a tad embarrassing. She decided not to worry too much, as none of the money requested for disaster relief had been used for anything but relief and so the town had nothing to hide from the inspection. In the meantime she had some letters to get to.

“Try to hold your tongue next time the inspector is around, needle brain,” she scolded, as she walked back into her office.

“I make no promises.”

With a roll of her eyes she went to open the first scroll. The blue wax and seal clearly indicated this was a letter from the Blueblood family, and as she expected she found it to be a letter from her old acquaintance, Prince Blueblood, Viscount of the Night Court. She had an inkling of an idea of what that letter might be and when she saw the ridiculously polished hoofwriting in the letter, something he had obviously dictated to some secretary, she had no need to actually read the words to know what it was. This was his usual invitation to be his date at the Grand Galloping Gala. This was the fifth time he had sent her such an invitation, and every time before she had turned him down. This year was not going to be any different. Prince might be the most eligible bachelor in Canterlot, according to the media, but in person he was a brash, blustering, and blunt buffoon.

Trixie crumpled the invitation and threw it at Pokey’s head from her place at her desk. Much to her amusement the ball of paper went and got itself impaled on the stallion’s sharp horn. He went crosseye, staring at the offending ball.

“Send a negative response to that letter on my behalf, would you?” Said Trixie, before moving on to the next scroll.

This one had a much more simple hoofwriting. It was steady like that of a unicorn but lacked any of the flourishes and sophistication of a trained secretary’s style. As she read over the missive, Trixie’s face became more and more livid, while her pupils shrank.

“Fils de pute!” she loudly let out, angrily slamming both her front hooves on her desk.

Pokey fell backward at the sudden outburst. “What?”

“That jerk!” said Trixie, pointing to the letter “He’s blackmailing me!”

Pokey got back to standing correctly and looked at Trixie with confusion “Who? What? Why?”

“Viscount Blueblood!” she said.

At his continued confusion she decided to go on. “You know how Rainbow Dash’s pranks got added to the lists of natural disasters by the previous Night Court Representative?”

“I remember. He got her a section under the Everfree weather phenomenon header, as an 'untamable force of nature'.”

“Well his nephew, Prince, is threatening to reveal the whole scam to Inspector Audit and make it look like it was me and the mayor’s fault if I don’t accept his invitation to the Grand Galloping Gala!” said Trixie, anger filling her voice. “If I don’t sent a positive RSVP before the Inspector leaves town, the documents will reach him.”

“He’s going to frame you for something his uncle did? What an eel! Can’t you just report his blackmailing? You’ve go his letter and everything,” asked Pokey, pointing at the letter she had just read.

A letter that suddenly burst into flames, crumbling into ashes on Trixie’s desk. Trixie looked at Pokey with a deadpanned expression.

“Oh,” he intoned. “Well at least we know he’s not a complete idiot.”

“Well, excuse me if I don't find that notion comforting,” replied Trixie.

Pokey shrugged and gave her a smirk “It would kinda look bad on your resume if you got trounced by a moron, wouldn’t it? So what do you intend to do?”

Trixie sighed as she slumped down on her cushion.“I don’t know yet. Let’s get work done and maybe I’ll go and ask one of my friend for counsel.”

“Who? Cheerilee? She’s good with legal matters,” said Pokey, setting Blueblood’s invitation aside, in case Trixie had no other choices.

“No, Monsieur Bourbon.”

“Shaker! My usual please, I need it,” said Trixie, addressing the stallion behind the bar.

The grey-coated unicorn smiled at her and walked up to her place at the bar. Shaker was the night-time barpony at Berry’s, the soda parlor and bar operated by Berry Punch. He came in to work when the alcohol was unlocked and the parlor turned from family establishment to Trixie’s favorite spot for sociable drinking in Ponyville. Not that Ponyville had much choice when it came to bars, but it was an amiable enough place to visit.

“Actually Miss Trixie, if you don’t mind, Berry’s got a new cocktail she wants you to try. She wants to make it the Night Time Trixie Special,” he said, referring to the original soda mixes Berry Punch had designed and named after each of the Elements of Harmony.

The Trixie Special was normally a mix of birch beer, cream soda and a quick shot of bluegrass juice for a little zing. It wasn’t very popular but Trixie liked it and that's what was the most important.

“There’s bourbon in it?” asked the unicorn with a raised eyebrow.

Shaker grinned broadly “Of course there is. It’s a boulvardier: bourbon, campari and sweet vermouth. The little twist here is that instead of ice cubes we’re using frozen blueberries.”

Trixie pondered it for a second and then nodded, “Fetch thy elixir, my good poison peddler!”

The stallion curtsied with a smile. "With all due haste, my lady."

Shaker went to work just as the door to the establishment opened. Trixie turned and broke into a smile when she saw it was Raindrops walking in. The pegasus waved to the unicorn and made her way to the bar.

"Hey Trixie," she said.

"Hey Rainsy! What brings you here?" asked Trixie, happy to see her friend.

"I was on my way home when I saw you coming in, thought I'd come and say hello since we didn't have much time to talk earlier today."

Trixie nodded in agreement. "Yeah, we were both on duty at the time after all. So where were you coming from?"

"I went to see Fire Chief Splasher after work, about the fire earlier," she said.

"Does Ponyville even have a fire inspector in its fire department?" asked Trixie.

Raindrops shook her head. "No. The fire department is only Chief Splasher and volunteers like me, but he said he would go on site to take a look, in case we missed anything."

Shaker came back with a ruby red drink in a glass and put it down in front of Trixie. Raindrops took the chance to order some ginger ale with citrus while Trixie took a sip of her cocktail.

Trixie closed her eyes and smiled happily "Oooh... rich blend of flavors! I love it! Tell Berry she can put it on the menu with my name on it. This is officially approved by the Element of Magic!"

Shaker went off to get Raindrops' order with a satisfied smile on his face. Trixie took another sip and let out a sigh.

"This should make me forget that nasty surprise," she said.

"Nasty surprise?"

The unicorn then told her pegasus friend what happened when she returned to her Residency earlier in the day, as well as the two letters from Blueblood. After explaining that, yes, his name was Prince and that he was actually Viscount, Trixie then went on to tell of the previous invitations.

"Why does that scumbag care so much about that invitation anyway?" asked Raindrops, sipping her ginger ale.

Trixie sighed and looked into the red pool of her drink "I don't know... I think the first time he just wanted to get on Luna's good side by being nice to me, but then when I refused he took it as a personal affront... and now... I guess he wants to impress the other nobles by how close to the Element of Magic he is?"

Raindrops rubbed her chin with her hoof. "Think that Inspector guy is in on it?"

Trixie shook her head. "If he was crooked he would be the one doing the blackmailing instead of Blueblood risking a letter to me. I think Audit is a straight guy, he's just a pawn in Blueblood's game here."

"So, what are you going to do then?"

Trixie didn't have the time to respond. Cries for help were suddenly heard outside the bar, and when Trixie and Raindrops turned to look through the front window they caught sight of a yellow-orange glow. Quickly the two of them dashed to the door, followed by Shaker and some of the patrons. They burst outside and found a parked cart engulfed in flames.

"My cart!" wailed one of the other patrons, a green unicorn stallion.

Shaker quickly turned back inside and came back holding a bucket of water in his telekinetic field. In the meantime Raindrops had taken off, to find the nearest cloud. Together the two of them took care of the fire before it could spread to anything else. Trixie took this opportunity to ask some of the bystanders, including the one who had called for help when she had noticed the burning cart.

"I'm sorry, I didn't hear or see anything. I just turned the corner and saw the cart on fire," answered the earth pony mare.

Raindrops landed next to Trixie and looked at her friend with confusion on her face. "You think this is related to what happened with Daisy's garden?"

"I hope it isn't Raindrops," replied the unicorn with a grim expression on her face. "Otherwise, Ponyville's in trouble."

Chapter 3

Trixie was singing.

Pokey could hardly believe it! Not the singing part itself as that was par for the course when Trixie was in her shower. In fact, he was pleasantly relieved that she didn’t conjure up an illusionary cheering audience this time. No, the real problem was with the timing. He was already running late by the time he had entered the Residency, meaning that Trixie must have woken up quite later than usual to not be done with her morning ritual yet. On the other hoof the singing was a good sign that Trixie wasn’t nursing a hangover. Then again she was friends with Carrot Top, so she usually had the farmer’s hangover cure on hoof.

The fact Trixie was still in her shower was a problem because Pokey had done a very good dramatic entrance, only to find nopony to witness it. He decided to wait for his boss by getting ahead in his paperwork. Something told him they wouldn’t be doing much office work today. From his desk he could fully appreciate Trixie’s singing, the tune of the day being something from her native Neigh-Orleans that Pokey didn’t understand.

J'suis né dans un bar au bord d'un marécage
Par une nuit de lune fine
J'ai appris à marcher dans le fond d'une barque
Contre les crosses des carabines

J'suis né dans le Bayou

Je peux lire le futur dans les entrailles des tatous
Après j'essuie le sang sûr mes jeans
J'étais dans les meilleurs à l'école de vodou
Des sorciers zebres de New Orléans

J'suis né dans le Bayou
J'suis né dans le Bayou

J'ai le cuir dur comme de l'alligator
Celui qui sèche dans la court
J'en mange un peu
Je danse autour
On dit que c'est bon pour l'amour

J'suis né dans le Bayou

En parlant de ça, j'suis pas un phénomène
Mais je me débrouille pour plaire
J'ai mon beau costard pou les fins de semaine
Quand Peggy met sa robe légère

J'suis né dans le Bayou
J'suis né dans le Bayou

Et je danse je danse sur la terre que j'aime
Celle que si gagne sur la boue
Et je marche je marche dans la belle lumière
Verte du Bayou

Et je danse je danse sur la terre que j'aime
Celle que si gagne sur la boue
Et j'avance j'avance dans la belle lumière
Verte du Bayou

J'suis né dans un bar au bord d'un marécage
Par une nuit de lune fine
J'ai appris à marcher dans le fond d'une barque
Contre les crosses des carabine

J'suis né dans le Bayou
J'suis né dans le Bayou

Trixie came down, mane wrapped in a purple towel, to find Pokey seated at his desk and engaged in paper work.

“Oh! You’re already here!” she said, surprised.

Her assistant looked up at her, sent a glance toward the clock on the wall, and lifted his eyebrows in an inquisitive fashion.

Trixie rolled her eyes in a huff. “Yeah I know I got up late. Want to make something of it? Bite me!”

Pokey sighed and got up, heading toward Trixie.

She gasped in shock, backing away with a look of panic on her face. “Wait! I didn’t mean literally!”

Much to her relief, the stallion just walked past her and headed for the front door without saying a word. Trixie stood there, blinking, staring at the door in complete confusion. Did her assistant just quit?

Just as she was asking herself that question, Pokey Pierce’s silvery magic opened the door in a dramatic slam, sending a gust of wind that threw Trixie’s towel off her still wet mane. The stallion leapt into the residency and struck a dramatic pose.

“Trixie!” he yelled loudly, looking positively frantic. “There’s been another mysterious fire! I was on my way to work when I noticed a commotion at the market place. Someone torched Mister Cabbage’s stand!” he quickly explained, pointing a hoof in the direction of the market.

Trixie was taken aback by this sudden change in the mood. She wasn’t fully convinced this wasn’t some sort of performance actually. Pokey could be a pretty good actor if he wanted to. In fact he showed more of his talent as he dragged his hooves into the office, a look of dramatic dismay etched over his features. He put a hoof to his forehead as he began recounting how distraught Mister Cabbage had been at the loss of his cabbages. Trixie, who had yet to eat breakfast, took a second to think that a cabbage muffin would be pretty good right about now. She was, however, broken out of her culinary daydream by five simple words uttered by her assistance.

“We have to do something!”

Trixie shook her head in confusion. “Wait…What? Why?” she said, moving a strand of her wet hair out of the way.

“It’s obvious we have an arsonist in Ponyville, Trixie,” Pokey said, “and it’s not like Ponyville has any investigator. You’re the Night Court representative, you’re supposed to be there for Equestria and I think Ponyville needs you right now.”

Trixie had recovered her towel using her magic, and was busy rubbing her mane to dry it out.

“What’s in it for me?” she asked, her mane exploding into a fluffy mess.

Pokey was courteous enough to not giggle at the sight. The two of them got back into the office proper just as a Trixie summoned a brush in a flash of blue magic. This was a spell she had learned watching Lyra summon her lyre. She had since then adapted it to her hat, cape and hairbrush, among other random items in her house.

“Well, you would be considered a hero for finding the culprit,” said the stallion.

“I saved the world from the Tyrant Sun!” replied the mare, somewhat offended.

“And some ponies in town still think you were about to sell them out to her to save your own hide,” said Pokey, shrugging as if those accusations were none of his concerns. “Besides, it would let you play Ace of Clover instead of doing paperwork.”

Trixie perked up at the mention of her newest literary heroine. She grabbed her hat off the coat rack and landed it on her head. With a flash of her magic her wizard hat turned into a purple star-studded fedora.

“Get your hat! We got a case to solve,” she declared.

Pokey smirked. “I don’t have a hat with me right now.”

“Where’d you get the magnifying glass?” asked Raindrops.

“The same place I got his hat,” said Trixie, pointing to Pokey’s new black bowler hat. “There’s a ton of old stuff in the residency basement.”

The male unicorn was currently interviewing witnesses around the market place. The way he was blushing while talking to Doctor Minuette seemed to suggest his interrogation had already moved past the subject of the incident.

“My cabbages! My cabbages!” wailed Mister Cabbage.

It had been about half an hour since Pokey had originally chanced upon the scene of the fire, and yet the poor Earth Pony stallion was still crying over his lost stand. Raindrops had been on the scene when they arrived, but this time it had been a unicorn, the aforementioned Doctor Minuette, with a bucket of water that had saved the day. The pegasus was still worried about all those fires and had stuck around. At the very least she could keep the owner company while he recovered. Trixie wondered if the overtly dramatic farmer was related to one of the Flower Trio.

Trixie had quickly used her magic to scan the spot. Without Raindrops’ magic flooding the site she did manage to make out a faint aura of wild magic. This was clearly not the work of well-molded magic, like a unicorn would do, and more a natural expression akin to that of a pegasus or earth pony. There was a quality about it that was hard to put into words for anyone without the same magic sight as her. The closest analogue Trixie could find was the word ‘spicy’, but she elected not to volunteer that description and kept it for herself.

It didn’t look quite like pegasus magic but she was no expert on them so she wasn’t ready to just outright ignore the possibility. After that summary examination she had pulled out a magnifying glass out of nowhere and had went about examining every square inch of charred cabbages laid out before her. That’s when Pokey trotted back to her side, a certain far off look in his eye that told Trixie he had other things on his mind besides helping the pursuit of law and order.

“Done flirting for today, Romeo? Finally realized you had no chance with her, huh?” Trixie asked, barely giving her assistant an annoyed glance.

“I was not flirting, I was interviewing witnesses. And for your information she thinks my new hat gives me an air of class,” he said, closing his eyes and turning his chin upward.

“Not flirting huh… classy is just a nice way of saying ‘stuffy’,” said Trixie, shaking her hoof as if to physically dismiss his claim.

“She said it makes my eyes look a warmer shade of green. You’re just jealous because everyone thinks your hat looks goofy,” he added with a smirk.

That comment got a rise out of Trixie who whipped her head around “What?! I’ll have you know my hat is perfectly fine! All my friends love my hat! Ask Raindrops!”

“Well your wizard hat is kind of goofy,” said Raindrops, shrugging. “But I can’t imagine you without it.”

Trixie grumbled something about the Element of Honesty and just went back to her examination while Pokey smile victoriously.

“Why don’t you just make with the skinny, Casanova, and tell us what you’ve learned between two fits of flirtatious giggling with the good Doctor,” she finally said.

“Not much to tell. She saw something orange flash by at the corner of her eyes and she turned in that direction only to see the cabbage stand was already in flames. She grabbed a bucket and took it out,” answered the stallion.

“Mister Cabbage told me he was still setting up. He went back to his wagon over there to get a tarp and when he returned it was already on fire. A few seconds later Doctor Minuette came back with her bucket,” added Raindrops.

Trixie nodded “No other witnesses?”

“As far as I know Doctor Minuette is the only pony to have seen the fire start. Everypony else only noticed when she called for water,” said Pokey.

“Guess we have a proper mystery on our hooves,” said Trixie, now on the opposite side of the stand from her friend.

She finally spotted something that wasn’t burnt vegetable. It was small and orange in color. With some precise application of telekinesis she plucked the clue out of the mess.

“Hah hah! Now we’re getting somewhere!” She declared.

“Found a clue, Boss?”

“Yes and don’t call me that. Here, take a look at this,” said Trixie, bringing her discovery about.

Raindrops gave Mister Cabbage a final pat on the back and went closer to her friend. Floating in a field of sparkling blue energy was a tiny feather of a bright orange color.

“You think our anonymous fiend left it behind?” asked Pokey.

Trixie rolled her eyes. “No your mother left it behind… of course it’s his! Do you see any orange pegasi around? Raindrops, I’m no expert on pegasus anatomy, do you know what kind of feather this is?”

Raindrops gazed at the feather, rubbing her chin with a hoof. “It’s assymetrical so it’s obviously a flight feather, but even by auxiliary covert standard it’s pretty small. If it didn’t have a vane and barbs I would think it was a downy feather.”

“Know anypony this could belong to?” asked Pokey.

Raindrops shrugged “By color and size I can only think of little Scootaloo, but I kinda doubt it’s her.”

Trixie blinked “Any particularly compelling reason those fires couldn’t be chalked up to some childish mischief?”

“Putting aside Cheerilee’s ranting about her behavior, I don’t think the kid has it in her,” began Pokey. “But more importantly, yesterday’s first fire occurred during class hours and I doubt Cheerilee would let one of her charges out of her sight long enough for one of them to cause the Flower Trio a panic attack.”

“Not that it would take that long to do that,” pointed out Trixie.

“There is that,” said Pokey, nodding.

“Plus Scootaloo can’t fly yet, so I doubt she could pull this off without someone seeing her run away,” added Rainrops.

“Well that sure got us nowhere fast,” said Trixie, turning her gaze back to the mess that used to be Mister Cabbage’s stand.

Trixie cursed herself for not examining hoof prints around the stand when she first got on site Then again she doubted there was anything left behind to find, considering how dry the weather had been recently and that about a dozen ponies had come to gawk or offer words of encouragement to Mister Cabbage. The farmer had begun slowly making his way back to his cart by now and was probably going to go somewhere else to wallow in overblown despair some more. Trixie considered moving this little brainstorming party elsewhere; the smell of burnt cabbages was starting to bother her.

“Wait a second!” she suddenly exclaimed, pointing a hoof at the charred mass, “If I found the feather in that mess then…”

Pokey’s eyes widened as he realized where Trixie was going. “Then why isn’t it burnt like the rest of it?”

“Exactly!” said Trixie, nodding.

“Guess there’s more to our mystery firebug that we thought at first glance,” added Pokey.

Trixie quickly turned to Raindrops “There isn’t a pony named Firebug in town is there?”

Raindrops rolled her eyes “We’re not that lucky, Trixie.”

Trixie gave a little pout and rubbed her chin with a hoof. Finally she had an idea and her eyes seemed to glimmer for a second.

“Allright then… my dear Pierceson I believe it is time to divide and conquer!” she said, closing her eyes and waving her hoof in a wide arc dramatically.

“Divide and conquer? Pierceson?” said the confused stallion.

“Well maybe not conquer, but divide anyway. You will go see your underworld contacts while I speak with certain officials to see if any new pegasus arrived in town recently or if any pegasus is acting in a suspicious manner,” she added.

Pokey stared at her, his eyebrow knitted in confusion.

Trixie sighed before explaining herself. “I mean you go see Pinkie Pie and I’ll go talk to Ditzy at the post office. Meet me at Berry’s afterward. That is if you don’t spend half the morning fluttering your eyelashes at each other.”

Pokey was about to object when Raindrops spoke up first, interrupting him. “Anything you want me to do to help? I can’t let some arsonist jerk mess with Ponyville like this," she said, pounding the ground with her hoof.

“Well if you can keep an eye out from the sky, do a little reconnaissance over the village, that would be helpful. Do a loop around town and then meet with us, if you’re not too busy with work that is.” said the unicorn.

The pegasus shook her head. “Nah, I’m on cloud patrol duty today, I just need to make sure clouds don’t clump together and that’s all. I can do that and keep an eye out for our pyromaniac at the same time.”

“Sounds good to me! Now let’s go! I want to score a muffin off of Ditzy before she eats them all!”

Chapter 4

Trixie was already sitting at a table outside Berry’s when Pokey Pierce arrived. She had a glass of a blue soda mix sitting on the table next to her and she was enjoying a muffin, the spoils of her expedition to Ponyville’s post office. Pokey, for his part, had only streamers and confetti decorating his bowler hat to show for his trouble. He also got to eat a cupcake but he wasn’t about to let Trixie know that. He sat down across from the mare, under the shade of the table’s parasol. Using his shimmering silver magic he took off his hat and shook it free of party paraphernalia.

“So, how’s Pinkie Pie?” asked Trixie, before taking a bite of her muffin.

“Ridiculously energetic,” the stallion answered with a sigh.

“Only ridiculously? She must be under the weather,” mused Trixie. “Did you manage to get something from her or did you just stammer while being lost in her sparkling green eyes?”

“That joke’s getting a little thin, Trixie. Besides, I cantered down that road in the past and all I’ve got out of it was a face full of pink taco,” said Pokey, shaking his head.

“Okay, I did not need to know that!” said Trixie, turning away in disgust.

Pokey’s forelegs went up in indignation. “I meant that literally! Our only date at Mexicolt Delight ended with a food fight!”

Trixie sighed in relief, but then she blinked in confusion. “Wait… since when are tacos pink?”

“Since Pinkie likes frosting on her tacos. Pink frosting.”

“Pink frosting? That pony is nuts,” said Trixie, earning a nod from Pokey. “Everypony knows you put chocolate frosting on tacos,” she added, this time only getting Pokey to recoil in disgust.

“Anyway, I don’t want to know anything about anything you do in private. You or anypony else!” she finished, sticking out her tongue in disgust.

The stallion rolled his eyes at his boss’ antic before he continued the conversation. “Anyway, Pinkie didn’t know of anypony new in town, or any other orange pegasus. And for your information her eyes are blue, not green. Was your little trip to the post office anymore successful than my journey to Sugarcube Corner?”

“I solved the case of the missing breakfeast,” said Trixie, pointing to the muffin floating in a shimmer of blue light by her head. “It’s a new recipe I suggested to Ditzy a while back. I call it the word chain muffin. It has bell pepper, peppercorn, and cornflower in it!”

“Okay, I did not need to know that!” said Pokey, turning green around the gills. “How can you eat that?”

“Simple: Like this,” said the mare, taking a bite and taking her time to slowly chew in plain view of her assistant.

“You two comedians should take your act on tour, you’d make a fortune,” said Raindrops, landing beside the table with an amused smirk on her face.

“That’s what I said yesterday!” replied Trixie in mocked outrage.

Pokey chuckled “Well, maybe next time. We’re already playing detective today. How much have you heard Rain?”

Raindrops sat down next to the two unicorns. “Enough to deduce neither of you jokers got anywhere with your little errands.”

“You have sharp wit my friend. Trixie should take lessons from you,” the male unicorn replied with a chuckle.

The female unicorn for her part ignored him. “Yeah, Ditzy did not know any pegasus in Ponyville matching the color of that feather. Or had seen anypony new in town either.”

“Speaking of feather… The more I think about your pegasus theory, the more I think it doesn’t add up,” began Raindrops, furrowing her brow. “None of the witnesses heard anything remotely like thunder, and the skies were pretty clear. How could a pegasus start a fire using magic without a lightning bolt?”

Trixie put a hoof to her chin “Can’t some pegasi actually create electricity out of thin air?”

“Some masters can use friction between their body and the surrounding air to cause static build up, similar to how ion charges build up in clouds but those masters are pretty rare. I’m not sure there are more than five of those alive today. Plus that discharge would still cause a peel of thunder to be heard.”

“Seems to me like Raindrops just rained on your parade, Trixie.”

Trixie glared. “I didn’t see you come up with anything better, chuckle colt.”

At that point a voice came from behind Trixie, making her jump in surprise.

“Good morning Representative Lulamoon.” Said Serious Audit.

Trixie turned to the inspector and gave him an uneasy and awkward smile. “Mister Audit! What a surprise! What brings you out here?”

“I found a damaged file at town hall and I needed to double check the date from the copy in the Residency archive. I was surprised to find your office locked and empty,” said the stallion in a dry tone, casting Trixie a disapproving glare.

“Well, you see…” began Trixie, a bead of sweat forming on her forehead.

“We’re on important business for the sake of the people of Equestria. We are investigating the recent string of arsons,” explained Pokey. “Ponyville is too small to have a dedicated investigator so we have to fill in. Mister Audit, this is our friend Raindrops, she is one of Ponyville’s volunteer firefighter.”

“Charmed,” said the inspector, giving Raindrops a courteous nod. “Isn’t this sort of work usually outsourced to licensed private investigators?”

“I have a license,” said the male unicorn.

“Since when?” asked Trixie and Raindrops at the same time.

Pokey shrugged. “I found the form for it while cleaning up, I figured it would be fun to have a P.I. license so I sent it in.”

“I heard of those arsons, so far nothing very valuable was targeted,” said Serious Audit, looking at the still flustered Trixie. “I certainly hope this is not some kind of scheme you cooked up to make Ponyville appear more dangerous than it really is. It would be insulting for both of us.”

Trixie was taken aback by this sudden accusation and stammered, before being cut once again by her assistant.

“Please, Trixie isn’t clever enough for that kind of scheme. Besides it would be a fairly stupid one because arsons, and compensations thereof, don’t fall under the jurisdiction of the Royal Equestrian Public Safety Commission anyway.”

Raindrops chuckled. “Are you saying she’s too dumb for it or not dumb enough?”

Pokey shrugged. “A little of column A and a little of column B,” he said, earning himself a killer glare from the mare in question.

Serious Audit coughed politely in his hoof, interrupting Raindrops’ second bout of chuckling, and spoke up as he turned toward his briefcase “Yes quite… let’s put that matter aside for now. I have the papers I need doubled-checked here with me in my…”

It took a second for everypony present to realize that Serious Audit had stopped talking mid sentence. All three ponies turned to look in the same direction as him.

“What’s wrong inspect…” began Trixie, only to stop as well.

Perched on Inspector Audit’s briefcase was a peculiar bird. It was small, not much bigger than a sparrow, bright orange with a red tail and crest, and sported a ridiculously oversized beak that would have looked more at home on an adult parrot than the chick this appeared to be. The bird sat there, staring with eyes that looked like two golden orbs. The ponies and bird seemed to stare at each other for quite a while, but in reality it was only about four or five seconds. Suddenly, with a loud squawk, the bird seemed to explode in a wave of fire that ignited the briefcase. At once the ponies reacted and spoke up.

“My briefcase!” cried Serious Audit.

“Our arsonist!” shouted Pokey.

“It’s a phoenix!” gasped Trixie.

“Grab it!” called Raindrops.

Pokey was the first to react to that order, pouncing toward the little phoenix chick still perched on the burning briefcase. Sadly the bird was too fast and it flew off, leaving Pokey to leap on top of the fire. With a yelp of pain he started to roll on the ground to put out the flames. Raindrops took off as fast as she could after the little bird, Trixie in full gallop behind her.

“My briefcase!” said Serious Audit again.

Pokey left him the singed item and he took up the chase as well.

Carrot Top was whistling a merry tune as she exited Blossomforth’s shop and headed across the street to Bon Bon’s candy shop for a little hello. Her bags were heavy with her supply of her favorite shampoo and nothing could spoil her day. That’s when a small orange bird, tiny wings beating faster than a hummingbird’s, flew like a bullet right past her. She recoiled and yelped in surprise.

“Out of the way CT!” shouted Raindrops, apparently chasing the bird down the street.

Raindrops flew past Carrot Top at a speed that the farmer had rarely seen her pegasus friend achieve. It was nothing compared to the likes of Rainbow Dash, or even Cloud Kicker and Thunderlane, but it was much faster than her usual speed. Carrot Top stumbled out of the way, following Raindrops with her eyes. A few seconds later Trixie, closely followed by Pokey Pierce, barreled past the earth pony at full gallop, both apologizing to her while they did so.

Carrot Top was thrown off balance and landed on her haunches. She sighed and looked in the direction of the chasing trio.

“Something tells me I don’t want to get involved,” she said, to nopony in particular.

Despite her head start Pokey had managed to catch up to Trixie and was actually in the process of passing her by. He didn’t seem very bothered by the full gallop while Trixie herself was already panting. Trixie was never much of an active pony, preferring to spend her free time sitting down. Pokey on the other hand had the habit of running laps around town every morning, and he was quite fit compared to most unicorn stallions. He had made fun of her sedentary life style more than once, but she hadn’t really given it much thought. After all Pokey mocked her pretty much all the time, at some point it just turned into background noise.

The phoenix swerved into a side street, but Raindrops was hot on its trail and didn’t get distracted. Trixie and Pokey easily kept up with her as they weaved between buildings. Trixie suddenly became aware of a piece of music coming from behind her. She chanced a glance behind her and found Pinkie Pie, phonograph strapped to her back, smiling at her.

“Pinkie! What are you doing?” asked the unicorn, making sure she wasn’t running into anything.

“Helping!” simply answered Pinkie.

Trixie decided the best course of action was to ignore the pink pony. The trio of pursuing pony, and their pink tagalong, emerged back into the Ponyville market place where they had started the day’s investigation. The market was a lot busier by this time of the day and the phoenix flew right above the head of the various ponies. It started to release blasts of flame, setting fire to hats, tarps and other knick-knacks. Raindrops kept up with the pyromaniac bird easy enough, but Trixie and Pokey found themselves faced with a panicked and confused crowd.

“We’ll never…get…through!” said Trixie, panting.

“I can get through anything,” replied Pokey, as his horn began to glow with silvery light.

A beam of light flew into the crowd from his horn. Surprised ponies jumped out of the way, creating a clear path for the two unicorns and Pinkie Pie. Pokey offered apologies as they galloped through the crowd.

Meanwhile Raindrops spotted one of her fellow volunteers in the crowd of onlookers, just as the phoenix flew above him and nearly sent his blonde mane of fire. Lucky for the tan stallion he managed to duck in time.

“Coconut, warn the fire chief!” she said, flying by at full speed.

“You got it dudette!” replied the surfer pony, saluting with a hoof.

Once again the chase took the bird and ponies in the back alleys between the colorful buildings of Ponyville. The bird tried once again to lose Raindrops by quickly swerving between buildings but the pegasus would have nothing of it, often threatening the bird with bodily harm for trying to burn down her town. The distance between the two was being reduced by the minute. While Raindrops wasn’t very fast, nopony could deny she had stamina.

“We’re gaining! It’s getting tired!” said Pokey.

Trixie wanted to reply that it wasn’t the only one getting tired, but she needed all her oxygen to keep up with her friends so she didn’t bother. Soon the merry chase ended up in a dead end. The phoenix was surprised and looked around, considering its options. That moment of hesitation was enough for Raindrops to finally catch up and grab the unruly avian in her forehoofs.

“You’re not going anywhere, you little twerp!” she said.

Her victory smirk was short-lived as the phoenix in her hooves exploded into flames and she let go, yelping in pain. The fur on her forelegs was immediately singed black where she had held on to the winged arsonist. The phoenix let loose a cry that sounded awfully like laughter and flew toward Raindrops’ backside, letting another burst of flame roast her rumps. The pegasus quickly turned around and swung at the phoenix, but the little bird flew under her hoof and shot by her flank, adding another burnt mark right under her wing. This pattern repeated a few more times, each miss resulting in another black mark appearing somewhere on Raindrops’ jasmine colored coat. Trixie and Pokey stopped a few feet away, confused about how to process.

“Enough!” shouted Raindrops, running out of patience.

This time she didn’t held anything back and her foreleg swung true. Her hoof connected with the phoenix’ little body and sent it shooting through the air like a bullet. The orange body impacted loudly against a nearby wall, cracking the wall and slumping to the ground.

Raindrops gasped in shocke and dropped immediately to the ground, holding a hoof to her face. Panic, guilt and fear all flashed across her face. Her ears were flattened against her head and tears were forming on the edge of her eyes.

“Oh no! No no no! I… I didn’t mean to! No no no I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to!” she said, looking back and forth between the two unicorns and the bird.

She took a few tentative steps toward the fallen phoenix, wishing the little bird were all right. Before she could reach it though, flames suddenly consumed its body! In a matter of a second or two, all that was left was a pile of ashes. This development put a stop to Raindrops’ guilt and fear, and replaced them with sheer confusion. Things only got worse when the ashes started to move of their own accord, flying up and turning into a twister. In a flash the ashes were replaced by a phoenix.

It looked like the previous bird Raindrops had been chasing, but it was bigger, older, and with more red over its wings and belly. Its beak still looked somewhat oversized but not quite as much.

It also had a fairly angry sounding call.

“Oh horseapples…” simply said Raindrops, reeling backward.

Chapter 5

The bird was laughing.

Raindrops could hardly believe it. The bird she thought she had killed in her rage was not only alive, not only bigger than before, but it was apparently mocking her! At first it had sounded like the angry cry of a hunting falcon, but then it broke into a series of sharp sounds. It was basically cackling. Mocking her even! She had felt terrible about what she had done, and the thing she was concerned for now seemed to think the whole situation was a joke! The bird looked at her and the gleam in the solid orbs that were its eyes sent shivers down the pegasus’ spine.

The Element of Honesty backed away from the bird, still feeling heat radiating from it. She ended up bumping into Trixie and Pokey.

“What is that thing?” she asked.

“It’s a phoenix, a flame spouting bird that can rejuvenate itself by bursting into flames. It’s practically immortal!” answered Trixie.

“I think I hate this,” said Pokey.

The phoenix began to flap its wings and gain altitude.

Raindrops gasped. “Trixie! Use your magic to grab it!”

The phoenix was still in range of Trixie’s telekinesis. She reached out with her magic and suddenly a blue shimmer halted the phoenix’s ascension. It struggled in Trixie’s telekinetic grasp, making the unicorn groan. Suddenly it stopped struggling and instead sent a burst of flames outward. Trixie immediately howled in pain, feeling as if she had put her hoof on a stove!

“It’s burning my magic!” she gasped, retracting her telekinetic hold. “How is that even possible?”

Trixie’s shocked expression seemed to greatly amuse the bird, which resumed cackling. The phoenix finished laughing and suddenly shot into the sky, leaving a small trail of embers in its wake. It had gotten much faster and Raindrops doubted she could catch up to it again, especially since she was still winded from the previous chase while it seemed fresh as a daisy now. Still that didn’t mean she was going to let it go without trying. For now she would have to keep to her hooves if she wanted to rest her wings.

“Don’t let it out of your sight!” she declared, galloping out the alley.

Raindrops emerged from the alley and scanned the main street. She could see the phoenix flying down toward the center of town. She could already spot two balconies and a flowerbed that had been set on fire! She was about to give chase when a voice called out to her.

“Raindrops dude!” came the unmistakable voice of Coconut.

She turned to see the earth pony galloping along side an older bright red pegasus stallion. The pegasus had a soft light green mane that was starting to turn grey on the sides, a big bushy mustache and was wearing the unmistakable helmet and long sleeved vest of a fire chief. His cutie mark showed two hose muzzle crossed over a flame.

“Chief Splasher! You’re here!”

“So that’s Ponyville’s fire chief?” commented Trixie, as she came out of the alley right behind Pokey Pierce.

“Yup, that’s Red Splasher,” said her assistant, nodding.

The fire chief landed in front of the trio and took a survey of the street ahead. “What in tarnation is going on Raindrops? We got fires all over town!”

“It’s a phoenix sir,” explained Raindrops. “I think it’s burning stuff in town just for fun. At first it was just a tiny bird but when I… I attacked it... it burst into flame and reappeared stronger than before!” Raindrops looked down at the ground. “I couldn’t stop it.”

The chief put a hoof on her shoulder. “Well, no use crying over spilled milk girl. I’m gonna need ya for what’s to come. Now, I already sent Cloud Kicker to ring the bell and call in everypony…”

Just as he finished, a bell began to ring loud and clear. The sound was coming from the top of city hall, and Trixie could see, if she squinted enough, the form of Cloud Kicker using a hammer to bang away at a bronze belt. The sound was frantic and Trixie guessed this was the signal for all volunteers to get to work. Red Splasher turned back to Coconut, a serious expression on his wizened face.

“Son, meet up with Marching Order, I want you boys to get out the bucket wagon, get as many civilians as you can and start some bucket lines. Tell Noteworthy and Grapes that I want them with the pump wagon near city hall five minutes ago!” he ordered.

“Right on, Chief dude!” declared the surfer pony before rushing away.

The firepony shook his head. “That boy ain’t right…” he said, as he surveyed the small fires near his current position.

Already ponies were taking care of them, but he could see smoke rising from other areas in town.

“Let’s go meet the rest of the volunteers by city hall, and quickly!”

Raindrops nodded. "Right! See you two later, duty calls!"

Trixie and Pokey watched as the pair of pegasi flew off. Trixie took off her hat and, with a quick flick, reverted it back to its normal form.

"This is bad, I have no idea how to deal with a phoenix," she said.

"Let's go help out," said Pokey. "We can at least help with the bucket chain."

Trixie put her hat back on, looking deep in thought. Finally she nodded, mostly to herself, and turned to Pokey.

"You go ahead, I need to find a quill and some parchment! I'll be there afterward!"

Pokey looked confused as his boss galloped away. “Quill and parchment? What?"

He shrugged it off and went in the direction of town hall.

Trixie in the meantime was running down the street when a familiar yellow and orange shape appeared before her. She stopped a few inches short of running into the Element of Generosity; skidding to a halt until we she was almost muzzle-to-muzzle with her. She stared into Carrot Top’s eye for a second, panting from exhaustion, before blinking and stepping back. Trixie was blushing slightly in embarrassment, but the earth pony only looked perplexed.

“Trixie, what’s going on? I heard the firepony bell,” asked the confused carrot farmer, raising an eyebrow.

“There’s a phoenix loose on the town and it’s burning stuff left and right!” explained Trixie, waving a hoof in the general direction the phoenix had flown toward.

Carrot Top gasped, putting a hoof to her mouth. “That’s terrible!”

“You should go see the other farmers and warn them! So far it’s only attacked the town but we don’t know if it won’t attack the farms next,” said Trixie, sidestepping her friend so she could continue on her quest for a quill and parchment. “I got to grab some supplies and then rush back to help with the bucket line.”

Trixie sighed, this was getting to be a really tiring day, and it was barely half done.

“I’ll do that. If the phoenix heads for the farmland, try to force it toward Sweet Apple Acres,” replied Carrot Top with a nod.

Trixie gasped and her eyes seemed to grow in size. “I can’t believe you just said that C! You’re making progress, I’m impressed!” she said with a wink.

Carrot Top furrowed her brow in confusion and seemed to ponder what Trixie had just said. Finally the meaning dawned on her and she too let out a gasp.

“No, no, no! You got it all wrong!” she said in a panic, waving a hoof in front of her face. “Sweet Apple Acres is the only farm in town who can afford fire wards! The whole place is protected from fire by magical enchantments!”

Trixie seemed to sag. “Well that’s disappointing. I’ll keep it in mind anyway, for now I got to run! See you later!”

And with that, she took off again.

When Pokey arrived near town hall, he found the fire chief hovering over the crowd massed in the circular plaza surrounding it, bright red blow horn in hoof, and barking orders left and right. The chief was no slouch when it came to organizing this chaos. Smoke could be seen at various points in town by now and targets had to be organized according to their importance, the chance of the fire spreading and in relation to the various sources of water in town.

“Pegasi! Get me some cloud cover and rain! I want this town as wet as possible!” the chief barked.

Pokey could see Cloud Kicker, Lightning Bolt and Raindrops being dispatched with some other pegasi to gather clouds.

“Lemony, Twinkleshine, catch up to the boys and take care of the hoses while they pump water! Everypony else get to the bucket lines!”

Pokey could see a pair of earth ponies pull Ponyville’s only pumping wagon away toward another part of town. The two mares ordered by the chief galloping in their direction. Already, volunteers and civilians working the bucket lines had extinguished two or three of the smaller fires around city hall. Pokey spotted the nearest one and cantered toward them. The cry of the phoenix could be heard in the distance.

“By Luna’s star spangled mane! Why is that giant fire hazard still opened?” asked Chief Red Splasher to no one in particular.

Pokey glanced to see the pegasus pointing a hoof toward the Hay Bale. The Hay Bale was a restaurant that served nothing but hay based food and drinks. Even the glasses of water had a few strands of hay instead of a lemon wedge to decorate them. The restaurant’s owners had taken the theme to its extreme: seats were piles of hay, tables were wagon wheels perched atop hay bales and the roof and walls were covered in hay to give the impression of a building made of hay (Pokey knew the shop that used to stand there, and thus he knew there was brick walls underneath it all). Red Splasher went to talk with the prim and proper wait staff of the establishment. Pokey couldn't hear but it was clear the conversation was getting heated.

“I don’t care ya pompous oaf! Evacuate that restaurant! Now!” bellowed the Chief, as one of the Hay Bale’s waiters shook an angry hoof in his direction.

Pokey was about to join the bucket line when the phoenix’ cry came from much closer. He heard somepony shout a cry of warning, and another claim the Hay Bale was doomed. The phoenix was visible in the sky above. It was making a wide turn and apparently aiming to hug the curvature of the city hall plaza. Its wings and tail were trailing flames, embers falling like a burning shooting star trail or a deadlier kind of firework.

By virtue of throwing himself horn first at random things, Pokey Pierce had developed a decent sense of trajectory and ballistic. Maybe not as much as a pegasus would, but a quick glance at Chief Splasher confirmed his suspicions: the phoenix’ flight path was going to take it around the town hall and swing it right into the Hay Bale! It was coming in into a dive at quite a speed.

“Oh no you don’t! You flying varmint!” growled the fire chief, as he placed himself right in the path of the flaming bird.

Pokey wondered briefly where the older stallion had gotten the axe he was presently wielding, but decided not to bother too long. The unicorn stallion turned back toward the line of pony he was going to join and, using his silvery telekinesis, grabbed hold of the bucket of water a slacked jawed earth pony mare had left on the ground at her hoof.

With a grunt of effort he threw the bucket of water with everything he could, right into the path of the incoming phoenix. The metal bucket flew, bottom first, and in a comical noise hit the phoenix right in its head! The creature was flung off course, losing control of its momentum. It bounced off the ground a few times, completely missing the Hay Bale and sliding down the nearby street. For a second Pokey hoped the creature had been knocked out. It had been lying down on the ground for at least ten seconds before the first onlookers began to tentatively approach it. The fire chief barked some more, ordering everypony to get back to work and he too headed for the fallen avian.

And then it opened its eyes. Its eyes were glowing with fury and flames alike and it rose into the sky in a mighty screech. This time, thought Pokey, this time it wasn’t in the mood to laugh. Its burning glare turned to the nearest house and it let loose a jet of flame that put any of its previous sparks to shame.

“Horseapples!” muttered Pokey.

When Trixie, horribly sweaty and out of breath, finally reached the plaza after her errand, she was met with a frightening sight.

Just on the other side of the plaza a building was engulfed in flames. Not just the balcony or the flowerpots burning, but the entire building was being devoured by the blaze. She heard a familiar screech and saw the phoenix circling the column of dark smoke rising from the building. Lines of ponies were stretched between the stream that cut through Ponyville all the way to the building, and were passing down buckets. A blaze that size couldn’t be stopped with simple buckets, but the ponies were doing their best to prevent it from spreading any further than that specific building. Pegasi, Raindrops included, were pushing clouds in the direction of the inferno. Trixie spotted the bright red coat of Red Splasher and a familiar blue stallion near him.

As the Element of Magic got closer to the building, she realized that situation was more complicated than it looked. First was the wall of flames that seem to ring the burning house, preventing anypony from getting closer to the building. But more importantly was that as soon as a pegasus had brought a cloud close enough, the phoenix would just chase them off with a few blasts of flames. The cloud Raindrops was pushing was actually annihilated by such an attack. Trixie reached Pokey just as her pegasus friend landed next to him. The unicorn was throwing water at the lawn between the two houses to prevent it from catching on fire before passing his empty bucket back down the line.

“It’s useless, even if we try all at once that thing can destroy clouds so we’d barely get a few drops down,” she said, barely reined in anger in her voice. “I want to buck that thing’s beak into next week but...”

“You’re afraid it’ll just come back stronger?” suggested Trixie.

“Trixie! There you are!” said Pokey. “Where were you?”

Trixie was about to answer when Chief Splasher interrupted her.

“Raindrops!” he called, making the mare stand at attention.

“Standard methods ain’t working, I need ya to go get Cloud Kicker and Lightning Bolt and pull off that maneuver y’all have been working on.”

Raindrops gasped “But you said it was too risky!”

Red Splasher shook his head. “Ain’t no time for caution girl, just go!” he said, pointing a hoof skyward.

“Right!”

And with that she flew off.

“Chief, did you recall the pumping wagon?” asked Pokey, while he poured some more water on the ground.

“No,” said the firepony. “This house is already a lost cause. All we can do is make sure it doesn’t hurt anypony.”

Trixie felt bad for the firepony. A posting in this small town was probably meant as a sort of retirement for the older stallion, and yet here he was, making tough calls. She wanted to say something or to offer some help when there was a commotion not far from them. She looked over and recognized Coconut and Marching Order, two ponies who she had at one point interviewed for the post of assistant before she hired Pokey Pierce. The two of them were holding back a hysterical green earth pony mare with a pink mane. The poor thing was sobbing and crying, trying to get past the two volunteer firepony.

A chill went down Trixie’s spine when she realized what the mare was saying. Red Splasher’s day had been made even worse.

“My son! He’s still inside!”

The fire chief galloped toward the situation. “Stay back Lady! You can’t go in there; nopony could make it through those flames!”

“By Luna’s stars! There has to be something we can do!” said Trixie, turning to her assistant.

She found the stallion staring at the sobbing mother with a steely resolve in his green eyes. Trixie had always known Pokey Pierce had a propensity toward grandiose gesture, but she had never grasped the full extent of his special brand of madness until he uttered the next phrase.

“I can get through anything.”

Much to her confusion he then used his telekinesis and dumped a bucket full of water over his own head.

“Wait…what are you…” began Trixie, reaching a hoof toward her assistant.

But it was too late to stop him. With a burst of speed he leaped over the wall of flame and galloped toward the front door of the burning house, the sound of the roaring inferno doing little to cover the collective gasp that went through the crowd of onlooker.

“Pokey you idiot! Get back here!” cried out the unicorn mare."We'll think of something else!"

“Don’t be a fool!” added the fire chief.

Pokey’s horn began to glow, the aura around his horn flowing outward over his body into a loose spiral. He threw himself head first at the wooden door of the building and broke right through it like it was made of cardboard. Just as he disappeared into the blaze there was a loud crack and debris blocked the doorway.

“Pokey!” howled Trixie.

Author's Note

How do you like this little holiday cliffhanger? This was a difficult chapter to write, it felt like I couldn't ever think of a transition from scene to scene! It was really laborious and I kept getting distracted by stuff, like reading updates to other fics.

Yes, the Hay Bale is a shoutout to the Xenophilia-verse ;)

As always, feel free to point out any errors that might have slipped through!

Chapter 6

Trixie was panicking.

She could hardly believe it: that idiot had jumped right into the inferno! Pokey Pierce, her loyal but irreverent assistant, was suddenly grasped by a bout of hero syndrome and decided to endanger his life foolishly. She wanted to save the foal as much as he did, but they could have come up with a much saner plan in ten seconds. Trixie herself could have her used her force field spell to enter safely, but now, after his ridiculous display, the entryway had collapsed.

She looked frantically around - purposely ignoring the brisk and loud orders of the fire chief beside her - desperately trying to find something, anything, to help her in rescuing the foal and her grandstanding assistant. Maybe if she gathered the other unicorns nearby they could levitate a water tower together and dump it on the house? The cries of the phoenix made her realize the bird would probably attack before that could happen. She briefly considered calling in the Elements of Harmony but Pokey had the time to die three times before she could reach the schoolhouse and come back with Cheerilee. She also remembered she had sent Carrot Top to the various farms to warn them, how long would it take to track her down?

Seconds felt like hours to Trixie as she kept inventing and dismissing plans. Meanwhile the volunteers had managed to extinguish a portion of the ring of flames, but that darn bird was way too aggressive to let them come much closer to the house itself. It was as if the phoenix was mocking the futility of their actions.

That’s when the wall of the house exploded.

The wall of the second floor just blew outward as a shape, surrounded by spiraling silver magic, propelled itself out of the house. Everypony in attendance stared in utter surprise as Pokey Pierce, with a little blue colt holding from dear life on his back, jumped out of the house. Just like he had done with the door, his magic extended from his horn to protect the rest of his body, but this time it seemed to spiral out in a much more impressive radius, giving him plenty of room to escape in style.

Trixie quickly realized that Pokey would get hurt if he landed on his hooves from that height. She reached out with her telekinesis and grabbed his hooves at best she could. A bead of sweat rolled down her forehead as she put everything she had into slowing the pair’s descent. Finally Pokey landed relatively softly and she could let her hold go. The stallion quickly rushed to the pleading mother. The two male’s mane and tail were darkened by soot and they had burned patches of fur all over, but on the whole they seemed in good condition.

“Mommy!” said the little colt, jumping into his mother’s arms.

“Shady!” replied the earth pony mare, hugging her son for all he was worth, giving Pokey a tearful smile. “Oh thank you thank you thank you! I don’t know how I could ever repay you!”

“It was nothing,” he replied, before coughing.

The little colt followed suit and began to cough. Nurse Redheart was beside the mother and colt in an instant, and to her urging, the pair headed to the hospital.

“You should go too, mister Pierce,” she insisted.

He shook his head. “I’ll go later, they might still need me.”

The nurse rolled her eyes but let it go. Trixie walked up to her assistant and gave him a slap behind the head.

He looked at her in confusion. “Ow! What was that for?”

“That was for being an idiot! If you had held off for a few seconds we could have come up with a better idea than to stab things!” she said angrily.

“You were worried about me,” said Pokey, somewhat amused. “That’s so sweet!”

Trixie’s blushing face turned into a pout as she looked back to the burning house. “Of course I was: who would do my paperwork?”

Trixie was saved from further embarrassment when Coconut and Marching Order came over. The tan earth pony stallion congratulated the unicorn on his ‘tubular rescue’, whatever that meant, while the military green pegasus simply gave him a salute.

Once again Red Splasher decided to interrupt the moment be cantering up to Trixie.

“You do illusions right?” he asked her, without actually letting her answer. “I need ya to distract that darn bird with some flashy stuff, the girls are ready to go!”

Trixie raised an eyebrow. “Sure I can but…what do you mean by ready?”

Red Splasher pointed a hoof to a part of the sky behind her. She turned to look and saw Lightning Bolt, Cloud Kicker and Raindrops adding a few more tuft of cloud to a giant formation. That thing was about the size of a house.

“Can they even move that thing?” The unicorn asked.

Trixie almost missed the small smirk that flashed over the fire chief’s feature, so obscured it was by his bushy mustache. “Trust me, they can. Just dazzle that thing!”

Trixie pushed up the brim of her hat to better display her horn, and then she replied with a confident grin of her own. “Dazzle? My dear fire chief, the Great and Powerful Trixie doesn’t merely dazzle, she mesmerizes!”

Trixie missed Red Splasher and Pokey rolling their eyes because she then stood on her hind legs, cape flaring out, and pointed her sparkling horn toward the flying creature now hovering above the blaze. Sparks of white, blue and purple loudly erupted in rapid succession around the phoenix, constantly turning up in its path wherever it tried to flee. The fire chief gave a signal to his pegasi team and Trixie risked turning to get a glance at the action. She was very curious to see thing supposedly risky thing Raindrops was about to perform.

To her surprise she saw her pegasus friend shot upward at an angle, away from the cloudbank and toward the burning house. When she looked back at the cloudbank she saw Cloud Kicker turn around and buck the cloud with both hind legs. At that moment Trixie understood why she got that name, and why her cutie mark was a cloud moving to hide the glaring sun, because the entire cloudbank flew forward at a surprising speed! Before the phoenix could recover from her firework assault, the massive cloud ended up right above it. That’s when Raindrops gave herself a wing powered push and dived down hooves first toward it, at a speed exceeding terminal velocity.

“Take this, bird brain!” shouted the jasmine pegasus just as she dissapeared into the cloud.

In the space of a second or less the entire cloud, which had been white and calm so far, turned completely grey with a subtle rumbling sound. Raindrops emerged from its underside and drove both her hooves into the phoenix; just as she flared her wings open with expert timing. The impact caused all of her momentum to transmit into her target. Like a bullet the creature crashed through what remained of the thatched roof of the house below and disappeared into the inferno. A second later the dark cloud seems to crack open and pour all of its water content, drenching the house and almost instantly dousing the flames. Raindrops stood under the rain with a disturbingly big grin on her face. The torrential downpour didn’t last that long, but it was enough to turn the dirt beneath Trixie’s hooves into mud.

With a series of creaking sound the battered house finally gave up. Damaged by the fire, Pokey’s assault on its walls, and finally the intense downpour, it just couldn’t stand up anymore. The blackened wood cracked and the building collapsed on itself. Luckily no debris landed much more than a few paces from the former house.

“That…was impressive,” said Trixie.

“No fooling,” added Pokey.

A smirking Raindrops landed in front of the unicorns and Red Splasher. “Fire has been explosively suppressed.”

“That was a pretty darn good field test girl. But ya shouldn’t have attacked that bird, you could have fallen down with it,” said the fire chief with a paternal tone.

“Don’t worry chief, that was an technique I learned studying Iron Hoof. I wasn’t going to follow it,” explained Raindrops.

“And you ever actually tried that move before?” asked Trixie, raising an eyebrow.

Raindrops looked away and bit her lower lip. “Well we were field testing something in the first place…”

“Not that this wasn’t a very cool display of rain making techniques,” began Pokey Pierce, “but what about the phoenix? If you killed it with that crash it’s just going to revive again!”

Raindrops waved her hoof in dismissal. “It can resurrect all it wants, I’d like to see it try to dig its way out of that pile!”

That’s when a beam of golden light erupted from the remain of the building, sending splinters of burnt wood and other miscellaneous debris rain down on the area and causing everypony present to take a step back. Trixie put a hoof to her face.

“You had to tempt fate!”

With a loud screech the phoenix flew up from the hole and hovered above the ruined building. It was once again bigger than before, and now almost all completely red save for some of its primary feathers, its tail and most of its face. It flapped its wings once and became engulf in a orb of light. It was like a miniature sun had just risen above Ponyville. Beams of the golden light began to shot outward at random, and everything those beams touched suddenly caught on fire.

“This is bad, this is really bad! Please tell me someone has a plan!” said Pokey, looking terrified.

“I don’t know!” replied Raindrops, as terrified but being somewhat more stoical about it.

“We need a miracle at this point,” added chief Splasher, in awe at the power of the creature.

Trixie was about to say something when a familiar dark mist flew through the air toward the golden orb of flaming death.

“Philomena Equestris! Stop right now!” said Princess Luna as she materialized.

Almost instantly the ball of golden light vanished and the phoenix hung its head down like a truant foal that had been caught doing something bad. Princess Luna hovered there, looking at it with an angry scowl on her regal face.

“Bad bird Philomena! How many times do I have to tell you ponies aren’t fireproof? Your pranks are not funny!” continued the Princess.

Trixie and the others could only watch in awe and confusion, as the phoenix that had terrified them seems to shrink before the withering gaze of their ruler. Trixie couldn’t hear but she guessed the phoenix had given the princess some sort of answer because Luna continued her dressing down.

“That’s no excuse missy! I know you Philomena. You probably started it! Besides you’re supposed to be grounded for two more centuries because of last time! Who let you out?”

Once again the phoenix meekly answered.

“Well Tia isn’t in charge anymore, I am, and I say you still have two more centuries. Now you’re going to go back to that cave and if I see you out before those centuries are done you’ll be in big trouble!”

The phoenix nodded and just… began to fly away.

The Princess flew to intercept it. “Now hold on just a minute! I want you to apologize to these nice ponies first! And be glad I’m not giving you extra time off for all the trouble you’ve caused!”

Princess Luna and the phoenix, Philomena, landed in front of Trixie’s little group. They all stared at the creature, not sure what to expect.

The bird let out a few squawks that, when strung together, sounded vaguely like it was trying to say ‘I’m sorry’.

The ponies stood in silence, staring at the bird, for what felt like a minute or two.

“Apologies… accepted…?”finally said Red Splasher, unsure of how to respond.

“Now you can go,” said Luna, apparently placated, as she teleported Philomena away.

“What…what just happened?” asked Trixie.

Princess Luna closed her eyes and sighed. “Philomena used to be, and I guess she still is, the royal pet. Well she was always more so my sister’s, but I stepped in to take care of her after, well… after banishing Corona into the sun. She has a very bad habit of playing pranks involving fire. It’s all fun and games until Trottingham is burnt to the ground. So I had to punish her by sealing her away to teach her a lesson.”

Raindrops blinked a few times. “Those were pranks?”

“Not at the end. Philomena also tends to burn things when she’s angry,” said the Princess, shaking her head.

Princess Luna surveyed the damage caused by the wayward pet, and saw all the fires still burning all over. Her horn glowed and a wave of dark blue light washed over the entire town, extinguishing every leftover blaze in an instant.

“I’ll personally make sure the family who lost their house will get a new home. Trixie, please forward any other damage claims directly to my office, I will take full responsibility,” she said.

“I will Princess,” said Trixie, smiling at her mentor. “It’s nice to see you again, regardless of circumstances. I didn’t expect you to come personally.”

Princess Luna bent down to give her student a subtle nuzzle. “It’s nice to see you as well, Trixie. I wouldn’t normally have come, however, when I found your note asking about how to deal with a rogue phoenix I quickly checked Philomena’s prison. I was surprised to find it breached. Philomena is no regular phoenix you see, she is much older than any other and is, in a fashion, related to regular phoenix in the same way I am related to regular ponies. There was no choice but to intervene personally.”

Red Splasher walked up to his ruler and bowed before speaking up. “It’s an honor to meet you in person, your majesty. This here stallion,” he said, motioning to Pokey, “did something really brave today. It was foolish and dangerous, but still brave. He jumped right into that burning house to go save a foal. I think he deserves a medal.”

Pokey blushed and looked away. “You don’t have to your majesty, I was just doing what I felt was right.”

“It is my experience, and my experience is quite long, that that is what all heroes say. I think your heroism does deserve some recognition. Be sure to keep an eye on your mailbox.”

Trixie nudged her assistant with her elbow. “Don’t get too excited, I bet it won’t be anywhere near as cool as mine.”

“You mean the one you sleep with?” replied Pokey with a smirk.

Trixie blushed and stammered. “Ho-how do you even know that?!”

“I didn’t. I just figured it was the only reason you didn’t display it in your office,” said Pokey, a satisfied grin on his face. “You totally fell for my bluff.”

Even Princess Luna had trouble holding back her laughter at Trixie’s annoyed expression.

Corona stared dagger at the Diamond Dog. “What art thou doing sitting there?”

The canine creature looked surprise. “Me am on break. Contract say we get ten minutes after two hours of work.”

Corona closed her eyes and gritted her teeth. “We…that is, I know the contract I have passed with your union by heart, the question is what art thou doing sitting on our… on my throne!”

The Diamond Dog suddenly realized he was sitting on the golden throne he had been ordered to polish and quickly jumped off, sitting down on the stairs leading up to it instead.

Corona rolled her eyes at the pathetic creature. She had hired these Diamond Dogs to carve her a new palace out of a sheer rock cliff. After a month or so in the dragon’s cave she had yearned for something bigger, grander, and more fitting of a Queen, and her minions had found her a wonderful volcano crater to inhabit. It had been a tad annoying to find that Diamond Dogs had unionized since she had last dealt with them, but she had gems to spare and they were excellent rock carvers and so she had endured their quirky notions of ‘working conditions’ and ‘task descriptions’. They also had an almost obsessive need to hide where they got their gems from, thus ensuring Corona a secretive work force that wouldn’t blab about her location.

Corona went to inspect the two large circular pits that had been dug into the floor of her throne room. About a few stories below the two shafts opened into the main magma chamber of the volcano. The two pits had been adorned with mirrors to better reflect the glow of the hot lava bellow, bathing the entire throne room in hues of red and orange. They also made for some nifty trash disposal. Expertly carved stones adorned with a sunray pattern circled each pit, turning them into the center of two large sun emblems. Corona was running a hoof along the surprisingly delicate work when Zecora entered the throne room and bowed low to the ground. Her dragon companion quickly followed and he gave his nominal master a quick, but insincere, curtsy.

“From your spy news I bring, I’m afraid Ponyville has stopped burning,” she said, producing a scroll.

“What? How is that possible?” asked the mad alicorn, grabbing hold of the scroll with her white telekinesis.

She unfurled the scroll and scanned over the message with her blank eyes. Once she was done she incinerated the scroll while growling in frustration.

Corona stomped her hoof on the floor, cracking the tile below. “How dare my sister order around my pet? It is not fair! Philomena is my pet! Mine!”

Corona closed her eye and took a deep breath, schooling her feature before her tantrum could get the best of her.

Spike smirked. “Guess that’s what happens when you send a pet to do your own work.”

Corona glared his way, and in a glow of white telekinesis she unceremoniously threw him down one of her lava pit. She had discovered not too long ago that the little dragon was lava proof, and she found throwing him down into the magma a most satisfying stress relief. There was a strange impact noise and the Diamond Dog hobbled over the edge of the pit. He seemed to wince in pain.

“Oooh...belly flop. Not good. Him must hurt.”

Exceedingly satisfying stress relief.

It was a few hours later, and the sun was already setting over Ponyville, when Trixie finally sprawled down on her sofa. Raindrops and Pokey were likewise lazily laying on their back on the thick plush carpet and couch. All three of them sported traces of soot and mud, and Pokey and Raindrops also had multiple burnt patches of fur. After Princess Luna’s return to Canterlot, the trio had helped clear out what was left of the burnt house, as well as help out all over town with some temporary repair. They were all terribly exhausted after their crazy day.

“My everything aches,” complained Trixie. “I feel pain in muscles I didn’t even know I had.”

“You just need to workout more,” said Pokey.

“You two don’t look so hot either,” replied Trixie, barely pointing a hoof at him.

“We’re just tired, it’s not the same,” said Raindrops, looking at Trixie with half lidded eyes.

Trixie couldn’t think of anything smarter to reply than “Oh yeah?”

That’s when a knock came at the door. Trixie shot a pleading look at Pokey and Raindrops. The stallion rolled his eyes and with a sigh rolled back to his hooves. He went to open the door.

“Inspector Audit! Did you come to see those files we talked about earlier?” she heard Pokey say. “Of course she’s in, she’s resting in the living room.”

The two stallions arrived in the living room and Trixie managed to at least sit down to greet the bureaucrat. Though it still pained her to do so.

“Hello Inspector,” she managed to say.

“Representative Lulamoon,” he replied in greeting. “I was impressed by the heroism I’ve witness today, and your dedication to your town. Not many representatives would dirty their hooves like I’ve seen you do today after the incident. And you, mister Pierce, were quite impressive. I understand why your employer endures your somewhat…unconventional behavior.”

Trixie was a bit confused by his change of opinion of her. “Thanks.”

“I haven’t lived such a terrifying day since the event of the last Longest Night! All that fire and confusion, it was terribly frightening. Tell me, is life in Ponyville always this…exciting?” asked the inspector.

Trixie sighed. “You don’t know the half of it.”

“Oh my!” replied Serious Audit, his ears flattening. “If you are constantly attacked by minions of the Tyrant Sun, it is no wonder you are constantly in need of repairs!”

Trixie was about to tell him that this was actually the first real attack since the escape of the Tyrant Sun, when another idea popped in her head. It was time for the Great and Powerful Trixie to take the stage. She glanced over to Raindrops and was happy to see the pegasus had apparently dozed off, and then she shot Pokey a wink.

“Oh yes it is so terrible,” she said, making an effort to get off the sofa and stand up. “We’ve had to deal with griffons attack, fend off a pack of ursa minors, contend with an insane pied piper pony leading that Parasprite swarm, and even an evil magical clone of our own weather captain!”

Audit raised an eyebrow. “A clone?”

Trixie put a hoof to her forehead and sighed as if the weight of the world was on her shoulder. “Ah yeah, poor miss Rainbow Dash, so nice and friendly, has an evil clone who was sent by Corona to do nothing but pester and harass us with her mean-spirited pranks. Miss Rainbow Dash is the fastest pony in town, and thus no one can catch up to her evil clone. It constantly returns and we can very little to stop it since it never challenges us directly. It is the source of all those ‘rainbow related incidents’ you might find under ‘wild weather pattern’.”

The stallion gasped in shock. “That sounds mighty serious! I understand why you and Princess Luna are keeping those events a secret from the public. Should word get out that the Tyrant Sun is applying such methods…why, it would be widespread panic!”

Trixie nodded a little too energetically for her aching neck. “Indeed my dear inspector. Everypony in Ponyville is bravely putting up with all those attacks for the sake of the peace of all of Equestria. Sadly, while we can’t let even a single clerk in Canterlot know of those events, but we still require fund for the victims.”

Serious Audit put a hoof to his mouth and looked deep in thought. “I can’t conduct a full investigation under these circumstances, and I fear I might get in the way of dealing with the recent crisis.”

Trixie wrapped a hoof around his shoulder and slowly led him toward the door. “Why don’t you just head back to Canterlot then? I’ll have Pokey send you copies of those files you were talking about earlier today, and then you’ll be able to tell the officials that everything is fine in Ponyville. Tell them that the Everfree Forest is acting more chaotic than usual, due to the return of the Tyrant Sun obviously, and take a day off or two afterward,” she continued, opening the door with her telekinesis. “After all, you just had such a terrifying day, you truly deserve some calm and quiet.”

Audit seemed to consider it before nodding in agreement. “That does sound like a good idea, Representative Lulamoon, but Viscount Blueblood sent me a note telling me he might be sending some more relevant files addressed to my temporary office at the town hall.”

“Don’t worry about it, if those documents come I’ll be sending them along with the copies of our files! Just make sure you don’t mention Ponyville’s secret.”

“Of course I won’t. I would not dare render useless all the brave sacrifices the folks of this town had to do for the sake of everypony else. Have a nice evening Representative Lulamon, and I hope we meet again in a more pleasant situation.”

And with that, he was gone, and Trixie closed the door. With this little farce Ponyville wouldn’t be suspected of fraud, at least for the moment, and Blueblood’s incriminating document would never reach Serious Audit. Blueblood would never raise any fuss about it because it would mean admitting to those in the know that Trixie had bested him. Of course there was the possibility of him releasing those documents again, but after the report Audit was about to submit those files would be thoroughly checked and any sign of tampering would be noticed, meaning that only the originals could work. Blueblood couldn’t release the originals, as they would incriminate his own family in the Rainbow Dash scam. She let out a sigh of relief. She was surprised to hear a slow hoof stomp from behind her. Her assistant, who had stood silent during her little act, was giving her a genuine smile.

“That was an impressive display of fast talk. Didn’t think you could keep it up until the end!”

Trixie gave him a little pout. “It was nothing, it’s not like I’m a complete idiot you know!”

Pokey chuckled. “So does that mean you admit to being a partial idiot?”

Trixie groaned in frustration.

“I’ll just take the fact you’re not denying it as admittance,” simply said Pokey, walking back into the living room.

“What? Get back here!” shouted Trixie, cantering after him.

“Shut up! I’m trying to nap here!” complained Raindrops.

Cue end credits

Author's Note

There you have it! A revised chapter 6. I hope that, for those few of you who saw the original, it is much more satisfying. I know that Trixie's plan isn't fool proof, but Blueblood's bluff was pretty thin to begin with and it's not like he's a chessmaster or anything. I hope that little added scene with Corona was suitably quirky!