Dressed to Steal

by Tatsurou

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Other, Slice of Life, Crossover, Coco Pommel, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 173885

Coco Pommel balances being the daughter of Sly Cooper and a member of the Cooper Gang with not disappointing her Law Enforcement mother, Inspector Carmelita Fox.

The Cooper Gang has faced many hurdles since they left the orphanage together. Each heist held its own hazards, its own problems, and its own consequences if anything went wrong. However, by working together, Sly, Bentley, and Murray have handled everything thrown their way.

However, their next mission saddles the raccoon leader of this little band of thieves with two hurdles he never anticipated, ones he'll have to handle himself: romance and fatherhood. After all, how could he resist the allure of the lovely Carmelita Fox, even if she is on the side of law enforcement? And an orphan himself, he could never turn his back on the lost, alone, and scared Coco Pommel, a tiny pony filly small enough to fit in his hand...and threatened by the worst of the worst of the criminal world.

Little did he know just how much these decisions would change all their lives.

----
Part of the PWNY-verse.

Edit: New cover art by Technopathic
Edit 2: New fan art by The Emerald Nightingale

Published 2016-08-21 01:20:02 UTC
Last updated 2018-05-21 19:30:40 UTC

How it Began

It all started out like just about any other story of the Cooper Gang you've probably heard. Dad and his friends seeking to steal from a particular criminal mastermind, and crossing metaphorical swords with Mom. Of course, they didn't have any relationship of that sort yet. Dad would flirt, Mom would shoot, he'd get away...that sort of thing.

The big difference came with the particular criminal they were after this time, about two years earlier. A scorpion named Seft, an Egyptian warlord who had been ravaging the countryside of Africa taking whatever he wanted and pissing off several world governments in the process. There wasn't much known about him beyond the fact that his troops were locusts and frogs...and that he was cold, calculating, and cruel.

My first experience of him was terrifyingly unpleasant...and yet, I have to thank him. If not for him, I'd have never met Dad...and I personally feel that made my life orders of magnitude better...

Sly breathed a sigh of relief as he managed to slip into the main laboratory building of Seft's base. It had been harrowing getting through all the temporary buildings that were too flimsy to walk across the top of, maneuvering through narrow passages between the buildings unable to see where guards might be coming from, in order to even get to the one mobile structure that was sturdy enough to walk along the top of. Apparently, Seft believed firmly in being able to cut and run at any time while leaving a minimum of resources behind.

Sly had even almost encountered Seft walking around his base while trying to get there. Seft himself wasn't as big as some crime bosses Sly had encountered, not much taller from head to toe than Sly himself after all. Most of Seft's goons were bigger than he was. But his entire body was covered with black chitinous armor and rippled with muscle, and his tail dripped venom as it arched over his back. Sly had managed to hide, but as he'd waited, Seft had looked right at his hiding place...then smirked and moved on. Sly had almost called the whole operation right there, but he'd already spotted Carmelita making her move. Whatever Seft was capable of, the last thing Sly wanted was to leave Inspector Fox to face it alone.

He was rather surprised to discover that the building was more lab than base of operations. However, he was easily able to cross the rafters to get close enough to hear what Seft was saying to the scientists.

"So...will it work?" Seft asked calmly, no emotion in his voice.

"Y-yes sir," the frog scientist responded nervously. "The portal device has enough energy to seize a lifeform from the other side. Once we've done so-"

"Yes, yes, we all know the plan already," Seft interrupted. "Are you really going to start monologuing the entire plan so any spy can hear the whole thing so they know how to thwart us?"

"Y-you think there are s-s-spies here, sir?" the frog gasped out worriedly, his eyes darting every which way.

"I always assume I'm being spied on," Seft growled out. "It's how I've managed to not get beaten and dragged off to some international prison yet. Now just get it running already."

"Understood sir," the frog agreed readily. Turning, he started manipulating tech next to a large metal circle.

Sly lifted his commoculars to his eyes, letting Bentley see the portal as well and opening communications. "Any idea what they're up to Bentley?" he whispered, almost quiet enough that he didn't hear his own words.

"It's obviously a portal of some sort," Bentley replied, stroking his chin in the mini-view screen. "But to where, no idea. Whatever it is, it's taking a lot of power. Whatever they're trying to pull through...well, you'll have to wait until they do it to find out."

"That's not very reassuring," Sly replied. "I'm pretty sure Carmelita's down there too, Bentley. If that portal spits out some sort of demonic flesh-eating hellspawn..."

"Maybe you should worry less about the Interpol agent that wants to arrest you and more on what we need to do here?" Bentley chided gently.

"I'm 16," Sly countered dryly. "What do you expect?"

Bentley groaned, burying his face in his hands. "Well, I do have some good news. As badly made as that frog disguise was, Murray was able to gather some pretty good intel. Unfortunately, the documents are in code, and without any idea what they're supposed to be about, it could take a while to find out what they're about."

"Well, I think we're about to," Sly murmured as the portal activated, flaring with light as electrical energy arced between the metal of the ring.

"Be careful, Sly," Bentley warned as Sly put the goggles away.

The lightning flashed for a time, and then discharged something before shutting down.

"That's all we've got," the frog spoke up. "If the plan doesn't work out, we can't open the portal again for-"

"It will work," Seft interrupted bluntly, bending down and scooping up the tiny creature.

Sly's eyes widened as he caught sight of the figure. It was a tiny four-legged equine, smaller than Bentley's backpack, with a pale cream coat, two-tone blue mane and tail, pale blue eyes, and a mark of a purple fedora on her rump. She stared up at Seft in absolute terror. Sly couldn't help but think she was absolutely-

"Adorable," Seft muttered before tossing her at the frog. "Get her plugged in."

The frog turned as the pony began to cry. "Y-yes sir-" His words were cut off as a blast of energy hit him, knocking him prone.

Carmelita leapt forward, scooping up the filly in one arm as she leveled her stun cannon with the other. "Seft, you are under arrest for acts of terrorism, grand theft, kidnapping, and..." She gestured at the portal. "I don't know what that is, but I'm pretty sure I can find a crime in it somewhere!"

Up above, Sly buried his face in one hand. He couldn't believe Carmelita thought that would work.

Seft, for his part, brought his pincers together in a slow clap, the hollow sound echoing through the room. "Well done, Inspector. I must say, I didn't expect you to have the guts to take me on alone and without backup. But then again, what should I expect from someone who made Chief Inspector so young? Only 19 and so much responsibility already? You have quite a lot to prove, don't you?"

Sly was torn. On the one hand, he didn't really like how Seft was talking to her, and wanted to rush in and help her even if it was suicidal at this point. On the other... She's only three years older than me? Nice. He couldn't help but look Carmelita over again, noticing just how kind puberty had been to her-

"Sly!" Bentley snapped in his ear, bringing him back to the present and the fact that Carmelita and the filly she was holding were in immediate danger.

Carmelita, for her part, looked angry. "Okay, just for that I'm kicking your ass," she growled at Seft.

"I'd just love to see how you intend to manage that from there," Seft pointed out dryly. "After all, you're way over there, and your stun cannon's rounds travel incredibly slowly. I could dodge them easily. Bullets, on the other hand..."

Carmelita flinched as the sound of several guns being cocked caught her attention, and an entire wall of frog soldiers stepped out of the shadows, leveling their weapons at her. She glanced around, looking for an exit.

"Don't bother," Seft warned. "They guard the only exit on this floor, you're not agile enough to leap to the rafters while carrying that filly, and the guards are only aiming in one direction...though above, below, and to either side of you. Ducking and letting them shoot each other isn't going to work."

Yikes! Sly thought to himself as he heard all that. This guy's actually competent! I may be in over my head here... Noticing Carmelita's expression tensing as she tried to hide her fear, he silently added, And so might she.

"Well?" Seft asked. "What's it going to be? Go down shooting? Or surrender peacefully?" His tone was almost bored.

Sly carefully raced over the rafters, gripping his cane at the base while wrapping feet and tail around the rafter. He was only going to get one shot at this.

To his surprise, Carmelita smirked. "You want her, right?" she asked, lifting up the filly, before throwing her straight up. The troops all started forward to catch her as Carmelita spun and fired several stun rounds.

Sly, for his part, acted. Leaning out precariously, he caught the filly in one arm even as the curved hook of his cane caught the back of Carmelita's belt. In the confusion, he pulled them both upward to get out by the roof.

Behind them, Seft smirked. "Cooper? Well now, this will be interesting after all..."

As he raced away with them in tow, Sly did his best not to be distracted by Carmelita's curves pressing against his back as he leapt around the temporary buildings, heading out of the base towards the Gang's temporary hideout. "Seems you were in a bit of a sticky situation, Inspector," he offered teasingly. "In over your head?"

"If you're expecting a thank you, don't hold your breath," Carmelita scolded irritably. "How's the girl?"

Realizing that was a valid question, Sly looked down at the filly in his arms. She seemed to be unhurt, and was looking up at him nervously. "What's your name little one?" he asked softly.

"Coco," the filly offered softly, her voice high pitched and showing just how young she was. "Coco Pommel." Sly estimated her being maybe four years old, maturity wise. Her next words confirmed that suspicion. "Are...are you my Mommy and Daddy?"

Carmelita started to open her mouth, but Sly quickly responded, "Yes."

"What?" Carmelita demanded angrily.

"Do you want her screaming about strangers?" Sly hissed back.

"Mommy! Daddy!" Coco called out happily, doing her best to hug both of them. Sly looked startled. Carmelita looked torn between pissed and consoling. As angry as she was with Sly, she obviously couldn't bring herself to upset a child so young.

Yeah...probably not the best beginnings to a 'happy family', but it did what it was supposed to. Of course, it wasn't over then. Seft was not one who took being thwarted lightly...and when his plans were revealed...well, I'll save that for next time.

Author's Note

Looked it up, and yes, apparently Sly was only 18 in Thievius Raccoonus...and 21 in "Honor Among Thieves".

Carmelita, as it happens, was 21 in Thievius Raccoonus, making her only three years older than Sly. Interesting, huh?

Teamwork

Now, if you know of my Mom and Dad at all, you know how Mom reacts to the idea of them working together. Even if she isn't actively hunting Dad at any given time, the idea of working with 'criminals' is anathema to her. So while she was fine with getting out of the situation with Seft's men, she still wasn't too keen on working with Dad, or even leaving me with Dad...

"You expect me to work with a pack of criminals?" Carmelita snapped out as she faced Sly down at the entrance to the Gang's temporary hideout, a cliffside cave near Seft's camp. "Don't be absurd! I would never stoop as low as to take orders from you."

"I'm not asking you to take orders from me," Sly insisted calmly, trying to calm things down. "All I'm saying is that we both want to take Seft down, and you've already seen where trying to take him on without backup is going to get you. And since there's no telling when he might pull up and leave, you don't have time to get more officers as backup."

"And you think that means I should accept your help?" Carmelita demanded acidly.

"We're going after him anyway," Sly pointed out. "I see no reason why we shouldn't coordinate."

"If you think for a moment-"

"Would you both keep it down?" Murray demanded as he gently rocked Coco back and forth in one arm, feeding her from a bowl of porridge with his free hand. "I just got Coco calm enough to eat something, and 'Mommy and Daddy' fighting is upsetting her!"

Carmelita growled in her throat as she heard that. While she did want to make sure the youngling was alright, the idea of sharing parenting with 'the ringtail' was unpleasant. This wasn't helped by the fact that Coco had bonded with 'Uncle Murray' and 'Uncle Bentley' on sight, proving just how lonely and desperate for familial companionship the little one was. But Carmelita was a Chief Inspector. She wasn't about to let a gang of thieves see just how much Coco's desperate need for love and belonging tugged on her heart strings. "Fine!" she snapped out finally. "It's not like we even know what we're doing yet, anyway, let alone what Seft is up to. I'll at least stick around for the intel."

"Fair enough," Sly agreed quickly, glad for anything to keep the peace...and keeping the peacekeeper near and relaxed. "Would you care for a drink? Maybe some snacks? Pretty sure we've got something around here Murray hasn't devoured yet."

"Hey!" Murray complained, though in a good natured tone of voice that set Bentley and Sly to laughing, and even got Coco giggling.

Carmelita rolled her eyes as she took a seat, letting Sly courteously bring her a drink and some snacks. If nothing else, he's a gentleman, she mused silently as she watched Bentley working away on his computer to decipher the documents they'd obtained. She decided not to think about whatever it was they had done to obtain those documents.

After a time, Bentley finally finished deciphering the material, though he took the time to read through it before speaking about it. Sly and Carmelita both kept their eyes on Bentley's face as he did so, and concern became mirrored on their faces as Bentley's grew paler and paler as he read. When he finally reached the end, he swallowed convulsively, licking his lips as he struggled to calm himself. "Murray," he began carefully, "why don't you take Coco to the back of the cave and put her down for a nap? You could read her a bedtime story or something."

"Story?" Coco gasped happily, looking excited even as she fought a yawn.

"Oh boy!" Murray bellowed softly as he stood up. "And I know just the one to tell you! Hansel and Gretel! It's my favorite! ...at least the way I tell it..."

Carmelita glanced towards Sly with a raised eyebrow. "The way he tells it?"

"Hansel and Gretel take the gingerbread house with them as snacks after finishing off the witch," Sly explained with a smirk.

Carmelita rolled her eyes again as Bentley cleared his throat. "I've managed to finish decoding the documents," he explained morosely. "It's not pretty."

"Go on then," Carmelita insisted. "I'm certain we can take it."

"This first use of the portal device is a proof of concept," Bentley explained. "The overall concept is straight forward. Gather enough energy to bridge dimensions however briefly and snatch an individual from the other side. Next, plug the individual into the portal device, and their life energies and any other energies unique to the other side of the portal is used to stabilize the link, so Seft and his troops can go in and conquer. If a world's to his liking, he uses it as his base of operations using it to go after other worlds. If not..." He swallowed convulsively. "If not, he intends to strip mine it of all available resources, including all residents and any unique energy sources, leaving behind a 'useless dead husk'. And the latter is what he intends for Coco's world."

Carmelita looked stricken at the very idea of it. At worst, she'd dealt with criminals dealing in grand theft or illegal activities in a conquered area, and the occasional bit of organized crime. She had difficulty even conceptualizing the idea of someone who would willingly condemn an entire world just to take all it had to offer...especially when she visualized a world full of creatures like Coco as the target.

Sly, on the other hand, was very familiar with just how vile the criminal world could get, and how little those that thrived in the depths of the abyss cared for the suffering of those it swallowed up. "Why is he intent on consuming Coco's world?" Sly asked firmly. "He hasn't even been there yet."

"Apparently, Coco's world is rich in an unusual energy resource he refers to as 'magic'," Bentley explained. "There aren't many details here in the papers we've got, but apparently even the individual living creatures of the world are rich in this resource." He didn't notice Carmelita's cheeks starting to turn green. "So he wants to strip it of resources...because this 'magic' will make it far easier both to open portals to other worlds, and to achieve dominance - of whichever source - in this one."

"By the heavens..." Carmelita moaned out. "That's..."

"Can the portal be opened again without plugging Coco into it?" Sly asked calmly, managing to keep his own disgust hidden.

"No, Sly," Bentley replied readily. "There's simply not enough energy available. Not only that, the act of opening the portal destabilized the boundary between the dimensions. Coco being plugged in would stabilize it...but otherwise, it won't stabilize enough to open another portal for a decade, give or take."

"Then we can't use it to send her home," Sly concluded simply. "Then our goal should be destroying the portal device, and any documents regarding its construction."

"And we'll also need to take Seft," Carmelita added. "I'm not sure how the interdimensional aspect fits into this, but his plans around it are definitely war crimes and Sapients Rights(1) violations. With this level of crimes confirmed now..." She cleared her throat carefully. "At this point, orders from headquarters would be to take him in...dead or alive."

"That we can certainly agree on," Sly confirmed grimly, shifting his cane from one hand to the other as he limbered up for what was to come.

Nodding, Carmelita stood up. "I'm going to get some air," she murmured as she turned towards the mouth of the cave. "Let me know when you have a plan." With that, she exited the cave, plainly disturbed.

"Sly," Bentley whispered worriedly, "there's more."

"How much worse can it get?" Sly groaned out.

"From what I've been able to determine...the design for the portal is Seft's own," Bentley explained. "Not only that, there's only a piece of the data for portal construction in these documents...specifically, the piece the group Murray was disguised as needed to do their part of the job, which tells me that Seft either keeps the only complete plan on him...or has it memorized."

Sly shuddered. "Which means that as long as he's alive, he can rebuild it...and there's no guarantee everyone dealing with him in the law enforcement side of things would be above brokering a deal between him and whoever might want to use that tech for a bit of profit."

"You...know what that means, Sly," Bentley offered nervously.

"I do," Sly offered, his voice sounding somewhat sick. "Carmelita said take him dead or alive. But for the sake of Coco, her world, and ours...the former is preferred..."

(1) A world where anthropomorphic animals of various sorts are the dominant life obviously wouldn't have Human Rights.

Death of Legend

I wasn't really aware of most of this, as Mom and Dad were both very careful to 'protect' me from the situation at hand. I didn't learn about it until later, from reading about it in Dad's journals. Of course, now I understand both why they did it and what was going on, and it makes sense. Still, learning that they had to make the choice to actively destroy the machine that brought me to them - and thus being my only way home - wasn't exactly pleasant. Still, they took good care of me afterwards, so I can hardly blame them.

The destruction of the portal was comparatively easy as opposed to going after Seft. Uncle Bentley was able to use a slingshot to place the tiny explosives, and a well timed detonation left the portal device so much scrap. Uncle Bentley made sure to gather that scrap after it was all over, to prevent reverse engineering by unsavory elements.

Dad confronted Seft...and found himself in difficulty.

Sly leapt back as Seft once more struck forward with his tail stinger, nearly grazing his arm. This battle was not going well. Seft had chosen a battleground that had nothing hanging from the ceiling or sticking up from the floor, no dangerous hazards to lead him into, and no closing doors to trap anyone with. It was, in fact, the plainest chamber in the entire facility, with only one square platform in the center covered in colored tiles that didn't appear to do anything directly under the skylight. Seft had made his way there in a calm manner the moment the portal device had been destroyed.

And now Sly found himself hard pressed. In order to evade the strikes of tail or pincer, he was forced to leap around, demonstrating his superior agility and evasion. Seft, on the other hand, let his natural armor take the brunt of any blow Sly managed to land with his cane, and his six legs made it exceptionally difficult to trip him up due to how he was able to distribute his weight. Sly was forced to expend a great deal of energy while Seft could take it easy, and wait for him to wear out.

"So you see it now," Seft commented as Sly got some distance and paused, taking a breath. "You understand the purpose of this attrition chamber."

"Attrition chamber?" Sly asked playfully as he got back into a combat stance. "Interesting name."

"Indeed," Seft confirmed. "You saw the design of my base. Brute strength cannot reach this far, nor technology. Only speed, stealth, and cunning would allow someone to get this far, to reach me here. And one who relies on such abilities would not be able to penetrate my natural armor with their weapons, and would be forced to try and wear me down with blunt force trauma." He smiled softly, wickedly. "In truth, Cooper, this room is a trap...originally set for your father."

"What?" Sly gasped out as he barely managed to dodge the next strike of pincer. "How do you know my father?"

"Only by reputation," Seft explained calmly. "The whole criminal underground knows the legend of the Cooper Clan, those who skate on the surface of the abyss, hunting those who thrive in its depths. We all knew that if our criminal enterprises became advanced enough, a member of that Clan would come and lay us low, take the fruits of our dark tree, and cast us out of the abyss to burn in the light of the law." He skittered to the side to avoid another of Sly's strikes. "At least, that was the case before the Fiendish Five decided to change things."

Sly suppressed his need to question eagerly as he flipped out of the way of yet another tail strike. "Fiendish Five?" he asked calmly as he landed on Seft's back, putting his cane in front of the scorpion man's neck in an attempt to strangle him. "Who are-"

Sly felt like his spine was being pulled out at his pelvis as Seft ignored the cane at his throat and caught the tip of Sly's tail in a pincer, yanking him off his back. "I don't intend to give you anymore information than that," Seft stated bluntly as he held Sly upside down. "They are the ones who killed your father, and stole and scattered your family tome. They bragged about it in the underground...and if you survive this day, you will have that to go on." Before Sly could get his balance, Seft proceeded to flip him like a flapjack, slamming him into the floor repeatedly until the bit of tail fur in his grip gave way, sending Sly flying across the room. "Unfortunately, I don't think you'll survive this day. Pity."

Sly groaned as he pushed himself back to his feet, fighting against the pain in his body. "Why...a pity?" he gasped out as he got back upright.

"Because you are a pale shadow of your father, or any ancestor," Seft mused regretfully. "I built this chamber to do battle with a legend. I began my conquest to draw out your line. I wanted to see just what the legend was made of, so I could bring it down or be brought down by it. That is what a legend deserves as an end...not an ambush in his own home before the eyes of his own son."

Sly's hands clenched around his cane, his eyes hardening. "You seem to know a lot about it."

"Of course," Seft agreed. "I wanted to see what your legacy was capable of. It's a pity you came across me now, however. Having never seen the full contents of that book, you possess only natural talent and a few skills, a fraction of what a true Cooper should be capable of. I had hoped to test myself against that." He stalked carefully forward, his stinger raised high. "However, I will still get a chance to see it after you fall."

"Oh?" Sly gasped out, staggering as he lowered his cane, the hook pointed towards the ground.

"Yes," Seft confirmed. "Once I've dealt with you and recovered the alien, I'll devote part of my resources and my personal attention to the destruction of the Fiendish Five and the recovery of the Thievius Raccoonus...and then use it to train the agents that will invade that other world for me. So rejoice, your father will be avenged." As he finished speaking, he struck with his stinger.

Spinning desperately, Sly brought the hook of his cane up and wrapped it around the base of the stinger. Rushing forward, he pulled with all his might against the curve of the tail. Unable to stop it in time, Seft's own stinger became embedded in his chest, punching a hole in his natural armor.

Seft let out a hiss as he backhanded Sly away, carefully extracting his stinger as he staggered back. "Yes!" he crowed excitedly. "This is the legend I wanted to see! Even as untrained as you are, your rage brings out the true Cooper! Show me more of who you are!" Standing upright, he charged in.

Sly once again found himself hard pressed, as Seft now began attacking much more aggressively. He was already weak from the battering he'd taken earlier, and he knew he wouldn't last much longer. When he aimed strikes at the hole Seft's stinger had left in his armor, Seft actively deflected, showing he both knew the weakness and was compensating for it. Sly needed to find a way to take the warlord down, fast and hard.

Several reports caught his attention and gave him a way, as Seft leapt back to dodge blasts from Carmelita's stun cannon. "I told you those rounds are far too slow, Inspector," Seft chided gently.

Noticing the smirk on Carmelita's face, Sly's eyes went to the projectiles fired. The first one seemed too round...too shiny...

Reacting instinctively, he leapt up and hooked his cane around the metal core he hadn't consciously realized was in that projectile, obviously made by Bentley for just this purpose. Letting gravity do his work, he slammed the projectile into the crook of Seft's neck. As the scorpion man staggered back, momentarily stunned, Sly lunged in and got the tip of his cane's hook into the hole. Putting his shoulder behind it, he was able to force the entire hook into Seft's inner flesh before kicking the end of the cane, forcing it in further.

Seft bellowed in pain as he staggered back onto the central platform. As Carmelita rushed to Sly's side to back him up, Seft began to chuckle. "So this is what a legend is capable of..." he growled out. Reaching up, he grabbed hold of the cane embedded in his chest and tore it free, heedless of the damage to himself this caused as he held the cane up in his pincer before grabbing hold of it with the other. "And this is how a legend should end..." His voice trailed off as a thoughtful expression crossed his face. "But if this is but the tip of the true legend...what could you do with your legacy at your disposal?"

A sudden grin crossed Seft's face, and he tossed the cane aside. "I will see you again some day, Cooper...when you have truly come into your own." He slammed the tips of his six legs onto six colored squares of the platform, and it suddenly sprang upward, propelling him into the sky where a high speed glider caught him, flying him off into the distance.

Sly quickly put his hand to his ear. "Tell me you're tracking him, Bentley!"

"Sorry Sly," Bentley replied regretfully. "I couldn't track him. His flight path is too erratic. By the time I was able to get a bead on him, he was out of range..."

So Seft got away, along with the knowledge of how to rebuild the portal. And Dad barely got away alive. Not exactly the best way that could have gone...

Start of Family

With Seft on the run, the situation with me apparently got a great deal more complicated. Even looking back, I don't really see it myself. After all, I stay with Dad or Mom at any given time. What's so complicated about that? Still, I take Mom's word for it on this. Apparently, it was a rather interesting discussion...

Sly and Carmelita once more sat on opposite sides of the table in the Gang's temporary cave hideout, sipping their drinks. Neither was happy with the outcome of the battle with Seft, though for different reasons.

"You were trying to kill him," Carmelita pointed out bluntly.

"I was," Sly admitted, his voice even. "The design of the portal was his. As long as he lives, he puts Coco, her world, and all other worlds in danger."

"He would pose no danger in prison," Carmelita insisted. "And he would certainly have gone there if we'd captured him."

"I know you would never use his knowledge," Sly countered. "But can you personally vouch for every guard, every warden, every judge, and every lawyer that he would be before at any given time once he was captured? Could you guarantee that none of them would be tempted at the idea of infinite wealth and power? Especially if they never saw who suffered for them to achieve it?"

Carmelita fell silent. She glowered at Sly for a time, then eventually lowered her eyes. She wanted to say Sly was wrong, but she knew better. After all, if he was wrong, why did Interpol - her own agency - have an Office of Internal Affairs? "It goes against my grain to set out specifically to kill someone," she offered finally.

"Mine too," Sly agreed. "Knowing I was going in there not as a thief, but as an assassin...it felt dirty. I hate myself for even trying...and hate myself even more for being relieved that he escaped, so I didn't have to find out if I actually had it in me to kill." He leaned back, taking another sip as he thought about it all for a time. "So...what now?"

Carmelita raised an eyebrow. "Now? Seft escaped. I'm going to have to file that report, and direct attention towards tracking him down."

"Not trying to arrest me this time?" Sly teased, a flirtatious grin on his face. "Inspector, I'm hurt."

Carmelita snorted disdainfully. "You saved my life and Coco's when I confronted Seft alone," she pointed out. "I'll overlook your status as a criminal this time."

"I still owe you, then," Sly pointed out, leaning forward. "I'd have been dead against Seft if you hadn't shown up when you did."

Carmelita shrugged, looking away. "You were more useful alive than dead then," she muttered, though Sly noticed her cheeks coloring slightly. She then cleared her throat, getting herself back under control. "Now, about Coco..."

Sly immediately stiffened. He didn't like the distant tone she was using. "What about her?" he inquired judiciously.

"I think I can fudge some paperwork to get her into a good orphanage," Carmelita began, hesitance in her voice at the idea of bending the rules even that much.

"No," Sly stated flat out, catching Carmelita off guard. "Even the best of those places is no place for her. No matter how good the people running them might be, the children take care of themselves their own way. As different as she is? She'll be miserable there...especially since 'Mommy and Daddy' put her there." His eyes narrowed. "And if you can't get her into a good one, and she ends up in a bad one..." He frowned, closing his eyes. "...nevermind..."

Carmelita stared in shock. She'd heard what Seft had said to Sly during the fight. She'd managed to put together that Sly had witnessed his father's death...but hadn't realized that meant he was an orphan. Seeing Murray and Bentley come up to him to rest their hands on his shoulders, she realized that that must have been the case with all three of them...likely where they met and became a Gang-

A family, another part of her mind supplied pointedly, making her lower her eyes.

"There's a more practical reason not to put her into the system," Bentley pointed out. "We don't know what Seft's resources are. Would you really bet Coco's life he wouldn't look there first for her, to try and reclaim her to power a new portal? Or that, if he found her, he wouldn't be able to get ahold of her there?"

"Or from whoever wound up adopting her?" Murray added. "Admittedly, that thought's rather optimistic. No matter how adorable and sweet she is...she's different."

Carmelita found herself wincing yet again. Obviously, all three of them had received a raw deal from 'the system' as far as their early lives went. She found herself feeling guilty about this. Even if she wasn't part of Child Services, she was still part of 'the system', and that made it her job to make sure there weren't so many sad stories. As such, every one she came across felt like a personal failure on her part, however illogical that was in the context. Her father, grandfather, and great-grandfather had all talked about having feelings like that themselves, and had told her it was the sign of a good cop. Her great-grandfather had said flat out that the day she stopped feeling guilty was the day she should hand in her badge.

"I can't take her," Carmelita said finally. "Even if I could come up with an explanation of where she came from, I won't be able to take care of her and do my job and make sure Seft can't get ahold of her. There's no way I'd be able to keep her."

"Then the solution is obvious," Sly offered warmly. "We'll take her. Not only will there always be at least one of us with her, we're completely off the grid. Even if Seft should somehow learn we have her with us, he'll never be able to track us down to get her."

Carmelita frowned. The idea was completely sound, looking at it just from the perspective of 'best for Coco'. But at the same time, something felt off from that perspective. "I'm not sure how I feel about my daughter being raised by a pack of thieves." The words were out of her mouth before she realized she was going to say them, and she bit the inside of her lip to keep herself from saying more as Bentley and Murray both snickered.

"Then how about this?" Sly offered. "Anytime you have a day off, we'll drop Coco off to spend the day with you. After all, the days off are the only time you'd be able to spend with her anyway if you took her yourself, by your own words." He grinned...slyly. "That should give you more than enough time to counter our 'untoward criminal influence' on her."

Carmelita glowered at Sly, knowing he was teasing her...and hating that she didn't have any ammo to fight back with. After all, not only was he right, any skills Coco picked up living with them would help her stay alive should Seft get a bead on her. Finally, however, she found a counter argument. "And if I manage to arrest the three of you?"

"She's a minor," Murray pointed out. "As long as she is one, legally she'll be a witness or 'victim', so you could take her into 'protective custody' personally to 'get her statements' and 'rehabilitate' her."

Carmelita's eyes widened in appreciation. That had been a valid point. And from the way Sly and Bentley were looking at their robust roomie, that was a rarity.

"Bad idea?" Murray asked worriedly when he noticed the stares.

"Very good, actually," Carmelita corrected. "Once Coco wakes up...we should explain the situation to her."

And that's how things began. Now, that's not to say it was all sunshine and rainbows between Mom and Dad. They still had their share of differences. But...learning to put my well being first helped smooth some things over.

Training With Daddy

Being raised primarily by a criminal Gang was certainly an experience. One of the first things I learned from Daddy was what it meant to be a Cooper: only steal from other criminals, with other thieves considered the cream of the crop as far as targets. After all, to steal from another Master Thief was the greatest challenge a Master Thief could ever face. This wasn't just about the challenge of it, however. It was also about an ethical and moral stance.

As Daddy put it, in terms of civilization thieves were predators. Civilians - those who lived their lives by the law and under its protection - were akin to domesticated animals, with the government being the domesticating force, and law enforcement the guard dogs. The Cooper bloodline, however, was a family of civilized predators, in those terms. Their prey was other predators, and in that way were oddly good for civilization. In addition to keeping the criminal element in line, it kept law enforcement on their toes trying to catch them.

Once I understood as much of what could be taught to me about the Family, Daddy started teaching me the skills I'd need to be part of the Gang. He kept things simple, but I soon discovered a unique talent for it...

"There are three basic skills as a thief," Sly explained to Coco as she watched him carefully, memorizing the words rather than taking notes (written records could be used against you, after all). "The agility to evade detection, pickpocketing, and safe cracking. All the skills of the Master Thief derive from these three. If you can do these three, you can accomplish anything with enough preparation and practice. Understand?"

Coco nodded eagerly. For her training, she was dressed in a miniature version of Sly's normal outfit. A blue long sleeved jacket, a blue beret, and a black eye mask. Sly did his best not to be swayed by how adorable that look made her when combined with her shining eyes and enthusiastic grin. "Got it, Daddy!"

Sly grinned as he looked down at her. "Now, pickpocketing requires a bit more agility than you currently have, and you're a bit young to get the full scale training for agility, so we'll start out with safe cracking. After all, quite a few skills derive from knowing how to handle a safe, and it should be the easiest for you to master. Are you ready?"

Coco nodded eagerly. "Yes Daddy, I am."

Sly stepped back, gesturing to two rooms they'd set up. "Behind the door on the left is the practice room. We've set it up so you can practice safe cracking until you're ready to try it for real. Inside each room, one safe and nine clue-bottles are scattered around."

"Clue-bottles?" Coco asked curiously.

Sly nodded. "Anytime there's a combination safe, there will be details scattered around the area that will allow one to determine the combination to the safe. Sometimes these will be documents, sometimes it will be clues embedded in various pieces of art or inscribed on the walls...but there will always be clues. It's in the nature of the mind to follow patterns, and if you can decode the patterns, the combination can be determined." He smirked pleasantly. "It's why Bentley's updated our personal security to bio-match scanners of his own design, concealed behind combination locks that don't actually do anything."

Bentley rubbed the back of his head nervously as Coco turned to look at him with wide-eyed awe. "Aw, Sly...do you have to make it out to be such a big deal?" he complained, flushed with embarrassment.

"Just giving credit where it's due," Sly pointed out easily. He then tapped the floor with the butt of his cane to get Coco's attention again. "The exact number of clues available varies frequently, but for this first attempt at both training and trial run, we've stuck to nine. Once you feel confident in the training room, give the trial room a try." He gestured to the other door. "There you will be timed on how quickly you find the nine clues, find the safe, and open it."

"And don't think you can just pop the safes, either!" Murray spoke up. "Not only do we change the combinations every time, but there's also always two false combinations. If you try to open the safe with a false combination, it'll spring a trap. That's an automatic fail."

Coco nodded in understanding. "Alright. I'll go practice." With that, she made her way to the practice room.

As she'd been told, a bit of an obstacle course was set up, though with no clear finish line. Instead, she had to explore the course, finding the nine clue-bottles and the safe. She took her time in exploring, making sure she didn't trip into the mud puddles or oil slicks, which were set up to make things more difficult to complete the challenge should she fall in. Thankfully, her small size and light weight played to her advantage. While she couldn't leap as high as Sly could, she could walk on surfaces that wouldn't support his weight.

Once she had all nine clues from the bottles, she laid them out in front of the safe. She saw the safe had three tumblers 0-9, and the nine clues were the nine squares of a piece of paper with the combination writ large across them once assembled properly. The combination was 4-0-8. Looking up, she saw that the tumblers were currently set to 5-5-5.

Leaning up, she grabbed the first tumbler. Due to her size, she had to press her ear to the safe to turn it, and accidentally turned it the wrong way, to 6. "That's not-" She stopped as she heard the tumbler turning, and heard a strange click inside that sounded...wrong, somehow. "Hmm..." Turning the dial again, she listened as the tumbler moved, but there was no click. Continuing to turn the dial, she heard another wrong sounding click at 9, and then a somehow satisfying click-thunk on 4. What was odd to her was just how quiet the sounds were, even with her ear practically pressed to the safe. "Interesting..."

She continued turning the dials and listening to the tumblers. As she did, she heard the off sounding clicks and the satisfying click-thunks. Once the right code was input, she pulled the lever, and the safe swung open, revealing a small chocolate. "Is...is this my prize?" she gasped out happily.

"That's right," Sly called out proudly. "Of course, you only get one prize per room each day of training, no matter how many times you go through the training room." He chuckled as he watched her devour the chocolate eagerly. "So, want to train again?"

Coco rubbed her chin thoughtfully. "Umm...could I try the trial?"

Murray chuckled at that. "Eager for her sweets, huh? Just like me."

"Alright, Coco," Sly responded. "We'll be watching from above. Good luck."

Nodding, Coco made her way into the other room. Much to her surprise, as soon as she stepped in, the safe was in plain sight, and a large timer began counting upward. She couldn't see any sign of any clue-bottles, and knew she'd have to search carefully...if she decided to look for them. Instead, she made her way straight to the safe, which currently had 3-3-3 input as a code.

Putting her ear to the safe, she started turning the first dial, listening to the ticks, the clicks, and eventually the click-thumps. After the third one, she pulled back and saw 6-0-9 input as the combination. Reaching up, she pulled the lever.

She heard a ding as the timer stopped, and the safe swung open. As she dove on the chocolate, Sly leapt down and came to her side. "So, was that a lucky guess, or something else?" he asked curiously.

Coco shrugged her shoulders. "I...listened," she explained around the chocolate in her mouth. She gestured to the safe in explanation. Sly sat back, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.

Uncle Bentley was able to figure out what happened there. Apparently, I heard things differently than everyone else did, logical because I was so different as a species. With my ear to the safe, I was able to hear how the tumblers moved as I input the combinations...and now I knew how to recognize both correct and incorrect combinations by doing so. As long as a combination lock was mechanical rather than electronic, I wouldn't need clues to crack it.

This made Daddy very, very proud. I got a milkshake for dinner!

Training With Uncles

Of course, Daddy's not the only one who trained me over the course of the next two years. As Daddy said, agility is a big part of being a Master Thief, and that required getting me physically tougher, as well as training my mind. Uncle Murray and Uncle Bentley worked with me in those areas...

Murray smiled down at Coco as she stared up at him. "Alright, Coco, I'm in charge of building up your physical fitness. That means toning all your muscles to their peak without bulking up at all, so you can jump and flip around the way Sly does." He let out a chuckle as he patted his ample belly. "After all, you're not ever gonna be big enough to punch your way through stuff like I can. Heck, you can fit in the palm of my hand just now."

"Up, Uncle Murray?" Coco asked hopefully, lifting her forelegs towards him.

Murray chuckled, but shook his head. "No, Coco. This is about getting you able to pick things up. Though that tactic right there might be good at getting close enough to pick pockets." Seeing Coco's ears go flat and her lip quiver without lowering her legs, he sighed. "Oh, come here, you!" Bending over, he scooped her up and held her close, enjoying her trying to hug him as best she could, even if she could only reach as far as his breast pockets. Bending over, he set her down. "Now then, as for fitness-" He froze, staring.

Coco grinned up at him eagerly. She clutched no less than seven wrapped snack cakes in her forelegs and was wearing a restaurant menu folded up as a hat, and a bib as a cape. While this was absolutely adorable, all of those things had been in Murray's breast pockets before picking her up.

Murray scratched at his head. He hadn't even noticed her reaching into his pockets. Patting his chest, he found no sign they'd been tampered with. Opening them up, however, he found they were indeed empty when they shouldn't have been. "Yo Sly!" he bellowed out. "I think you can skip non-tool-assisted pick pocketing! She's a natural!"

As Coco giggled happily at the praise, Sly called back, "That's a relief. I couldn't figure out for the life of me how to translate dexterous finger manipulations to hooves. Still gonna test her, though."

"I know you will!" Murray called back. He then held out his hands. "Give 'em back now, Coco." Coco obediently returned the filched items. Once his pockets were stuffed, Murray set his jacket aside. "Alright, first thing I'm going to teach you is push ups. Not gonna do too many of them, though, that'd be too hard on you." Letting himself fall forward, he caught the ground with his palms and proceeded to fire off a good two dozen push ups, back ramrod straight and gut sucked in so it didn't touch the ground. "Now you try!" he instructed.

Grinning, Coco proceeded to bend all four knees repeatedly, mimicking Murray's motions as best she could.

Murray rubbed his chin. "Huh...this will take some thinking..."

Bentley rubbed his gloved hands together as he sat across from the filly. "Alright, Coco. I'm going to be covering some brain exercises with you. Critical thinking and logic are going to be very important when it comes to making a heist, and you need to be able to plot the best path to take when it comes to infiltrating a facility, whatever sort of facility it, uh, happens to be." He shook his head as he tried to regain his confidence. Something about the way she just stared up at him with that soft smile, those adoring eyes, the way her forehooves rested on the table as her tail wiggled back and forth in her chair...

Shivering, Bentley got control of himself. "Now, first things first is some basic logic puzzles. I'll be laying out a few clues regarding a few points of information. From those clues, I want you to fill in the blanks." He laid out a standard book of logic puzzles. "Work through a few of these until you feel confident in the concept, and then I'll make a few more for you."

Bentley sat back, confident that this would work quite well...until he noticed Coco not even reaching for the pencil. "Umm...Uncle Bentley?" she asked worriedly.

"Yeah?"

"What does this say?" She pointed to the text. "I...can't read it."

Bentley's palm promptly met his face. "No shoes, Sherlock," he grumbled to himself, managing to censor himself before teaching her a swear word. "She comes from another world! Just because the spoken language is compatible doesn't mean the written ones are!" Standing up, he went to a nearby shelf and pulled out some old books and notepads, setting them out in front of Coco. "Alright, I guess first up instead is teaching you to read and write...just as soon as I come up with a way for you to hold the pencil. I mean, you have hooves after all, no fingers..." His voice trailed off as he saw her holding the pencil in her mouth and manipulating it with teeth and tongue, drawing a rather good likeness of Sly from memory. "Huh. That's a...rather talented tongue..." he mumbled, stunned.

"Bentley!" Sly snapped, sticking his head in, having only heard those last words. "Just what are you teaching her?"

"Look at how she's holding that pencil!" Bentley proclaimed, pointing to Coco as she continued to draw.

Sly stared for a time. "Huh, you're right," he admitted, rubbing his chin. He then grinned slyly. "Wonder if she gets that from her mot-"

"SLY!"

I still don't get Daddy's sense of humor. What's really weird is that the first time I stayed with Mommy, she said the same thing about my tongue when I showed her how I could draw. For some reason, she turned bright red when I said I thought I got it from Daddy, and started stammering. She also took a cold shower the moment Daddy got me back out the door when he came to pick me up that day. I decided not to tell Daddy about it, but Uncle Murray found it hilarious.

Training With Mommy

Of course, I learned just as much from Mommy as I did from Daddy and my Uncles. She seemed bound and determined to 'counteract' their influence as much as possible, to raise me up as skilled law enforcement. At first, she'd thought about strict lessons...but she quickly saw I was simply not emotionally equipped to handle that. Instead, she took a different approach, figuring out what my skills were, and turning that into a way to teach me crime fighting skills. Course, most of those could easily be adapted to crime skills...

Carmelita smiled down at Coco as they sat together in her apartment, going over some pictures she'd prepared to teach Coco some investigative skills. "Do you think you have it?" she asked softly.

Coco nodded. "I think I'm ready!" she agreed. She loved this game.

Smiling, Carmelita put the picture away and pulled out one that seemed identical at first glance. "Alright. What's different?"

Coco took the picture in her hooves and examined it carefully. "Hmm...wasn't this green before?" she asked, pointing to a small logo on a shirt one of the people in the picture was wearing.

"Was it?" Carmelita asked carefully, holding up a scorepad and pencil.

Coco thought about it for a time. "...yes, yes it was," Coco stated firmly. "And...this light was yellow before. And this sign was in English before, now it's in Irish." She looked at the picture for a time, pointing out several other remembered differences.

Carmelita smiled as she marked them down, seeing that she was getting all of them. However, as she reached the last one on her list, she asked, "Anything else?" After all, the mind could easily trick an observer if they thought there were more differences.

Coco examined the picture for a time. "Hmm...I don't think..." She hesitated, then turned the paper over. "Was this printed on a different printer than the original? The paper feels different, and there's a different smell to the ink."

Carmelita felt her jaw drop. She had fully expected Coco's senses to be a bit more acute than those of herself and others from this world. It was only natural, considering her body structure marked her as being closer to nature, more 'feral' in a way, like the wild animals she'd encountered before. Civilization brought a trade off of slightly deadened senses and weaker instincts, though it seemed Coco's race had a better trade if she was able to distinguish that much. The picture had in fact been printed on a different machine, as the first one had run out of colored ink and it had been easier to send the job to a different machine than futz with replacing the cartridge. She hadn't planned on testing that, however. "Indeed it was," she confirmed, deciding to mark it down as a bonus point. "Very good, Coco."

Coco grinned widely as she examined the sheet a bit more. "Umm...I don't think there are any others..." Hesitantly, she handed the sheet back. "I think I'm done. H-how'd I do?"

Carmelita smiled widely as she pulled Coco into a tight hug. "You did flawlessly, Coco. I'm very proud of you." Coco's grin at the praise split her face, and she nuzzled into the embrace. "So, what would you like to do next?"

Coco fidgeted a bit. "Umm...can we sew?" she asked hopefully.

Carmelita blinked in surprise. She'd introduced Coco to sewing mostly because she'd been altering some of her own clothes to fit her so that Coco could wear something other than Sly's usual colors. Much to her surprise, the little pony had discovered an absolute passion for it, especially when it came to making outfits. "You really like sewing, don't you?" she asked warmly.

"More than target practice..." Coco whimpered softly. "I can't hold it right..."

Carmelita couldn't stop her sigh. She'd tried to teach Coco marksmanship, but without fingers she had trouble manipulating traditional gun grips. Even toy guns weren't viable, as their grips were all standardized. Carmelita had since been debating whether to shell out the cash to make customized grips for hooves of both live weapons and toy guns, or asking Coco to get Bentley to do it. Doing it herself meant there was no chance of illegality about it, but getting Bentley to do it meant there would be no record of it, which was better for Coco. Beyond that, she didn't actually have that much ready cash, which was why she'd been altering her old clothes rather than buying new ones. "Alright," she responded warmly finally. "Let's see what you make today."

Coco squealed happily, reaching into the bags hanging off her sides - Carmelita disliked referring to them as saddlebags, even if that's exactly what they were - and pulled out her sewing kit, eager to see what project Carmelita had for her. Carmelita, for her part, pulled out several old clothes of hers that needed repairs or modifications.

While Carmelita had been somewhat hesitant to spend so much of her own time sitting around sewing, Coco's enthusiasm had swept her up. She wasn't as good as Coco at it, but she found a sort of relaxing domesticity in it. Sitting there with her little girl in her lap as they sewed together, she found herself shifting idly back and forth in her chair, imitating the motion of a rocking chair. It was...peaceful. There were very few things in her life that were peaceful.

After a time, Coco set down the project she'd been working on. "There!" she said happily, putting thread and needles away and reaching for scissors.

"What have you got there?" Carmelita asked curiously.

"I tried needlepoint!" Coco proclaimed happily. "Like it Mommy?"

Carmelita looked over the needlepoint design. It was a warm scene of the inside of a cabin, with a fire burning beneath a chimney. Details were vague, as Coco had only so much material to work with in terms of space, but certain shapes were readily recognizable. An orange shape in the rocking chair was obviously Carmelita herself, with a cream Coco in her lap. What caught Carmelita off guard was the grey and blue shape beside the chair could only be Sly from the shape of the cane he was resting on, and the pink and green shapes at the table were thus readily recognizable as Murray and Bentley, respectively.

Carmelita struggled to find a way to respond to this, only to be distracted as she heard a familiar buzzing. Looking up, she spotted a mosquito buzzing around the apartment. "Damn," she muttered under her breath, reaching for a rolled up newspaper. The last thing she wanted to find out was if Coco had the proper immunities for the world by letting her get bit.

She heard a swish in the air, and before her very eyes the mosquito became pinned to the ceiling by a sewing needle. Turning, she saw Coco lowering her hoof. "Don't like bugs," she murmured softly.

Carmelita brought her hand up to her chin. "Hmm..."

After that, Mommy started off training me with thrown weapons. Worked much better for me than trying to adapt a gun to my hooves, and just as effective as a stun cannon when using short needles dipped in a knock out agent. She was so proud of me...

Family Outing

Of course, not everything I did at that age with my family was training. Both my parents and both Uncles were determined to give me a healthy childhood, if not a normal one, and that meant plenty of interaction with other children and activities that were just for fun. Of course, that wasn't exactly easy for any of them to arrange for me. Mostly, this was done when Daddy and my Uncles arranged to 'drop by' and join whatever outings Mommy was taking me on, showing up in disguise that we immediately saw through, but was good enough to fool anyone else. I still remember my favorite outing, though...

Coco's eyes were wide as she stared out from under her motorcycle helmet, strapped in tight to the sidecar of Carmelita's motorcycle. It had been a year since she'd been adopted by Sly and Carmelita, and they considered that to be her birthday now, making her five years old. As such, they had decided on a special celebration, and Carmelita had arranged to get that day and the two on either side of it off, so she'd have a full three days to spend with Coco. The first day had been spent just the two of them enjoying themselves together as mother and daughter, playing games, watching movies, and sewing together. Today, however...today they were going to the carnival.

Carmelita had provided a good amount of change for the various attractions, intending to let her fully enjoy herself. At the end of the carnival, they'd be meeting up with Sly and the others, as Murray had apparently spent all of the previous day baking her the perfect cake. Carmelita supposed that, as fond as Murray was of sweets, he probably knew quite a bit about baking by now. If not, they could always buy a cake after watching whatever chaos would ensue with the one Murray made. But for now, the carnival.

Carmelita had gone for more relaxed attire for this trip, with tight fitting black pants and a black jacket over a tight fitting white shirt for riding the motorcycle, comfortable in it for walking around in. Of course, the outfit was bound to get her hit on at some point by any single teenagers at the carnival, but she figured the nightstick hanging from her belt would tell them she would hit back.

She smiled softly to herself as she watched Coco rush from one booth to the next, eager to try anything and everything to win prizes. She didn't do too well at the shooting gallery as she still struggled with holding a gun, but Carmelita was happy to win her a plushy there, taking it from the hippo running the stand when it was handed over. Of course, then Coco wanted to win her a plushy, and went straight to the dart booth.

...Carmelita would never figure out how Coco was able to pop 25 balloons with three darts, and neither would the poor booth turtle...

After that, Coco clutched her pony plushy tightly as she scampered around the carnival. It was of approximately the right size and color for her to use as a body double, and Carmelita was certain it would be used that way at some point. Carmelita, meanwhile, stared oddly at the raccoon plushy that Coco had won for her. She had a hard time believing it was coincidence that it was wearing a blue vest.

She was just putting that out of her mind as Coco ran up to her, tugging on the nightstick to get her attention. "Mommy! Mommy! I got you something!"

Carmelita chuckled softly. "Oh?"

"This way!" Coco promptly began tugging Carmelita along behind her.

Carmelita rolled her eyes and allowed herself to be led, only to pause as she saw Coco was tugging her towards a kissing booth. "Seriously?" she demanded irritably.

"Bought you a kiss!" Coco squealed happily.

Carmelita stared at Coco for a time, then smirked. While she wouldn't normally go for something like this, getting to watch Sly squirm when they met up later by telling him Coco had arranged for her to kiss someone else would be worth it. Smirking, she walked up to the booth and leaned towards the raccoon there-

Her eyes narrowed as she remembered other details she'd seen. "...really, Sly?" she growled out. "A kissing booth? That's your idea of good cover at a carnival?"

Sly chuckled, his brown jacket and pants hiding much of his physique. "What gave me away?" he asked softly.

"Murray running the shooting gallery and Bentley running the dart booth," Carmelita responded. "The first three booths we stop at just happen to have you three running them?"

Sly smirked as Coco burst into giggles. "Our shift ends in a few minutes. We'll be joining you."

"You mean you actually got a job here for the day?" Carmelita asked, shocked.

"Anything for our little girl," Sly replied sincerely. He then lifted his hand, trailing one finger through the air in the direction of her face, miming stroking her cheek. "And you, Miss Fox. Now you wouldn't want to disappoint her, would you? She did pay a full dollar for the kiss."

Carmelita stared at the incorrigible thief for a time, thinking about their past interactions. For the past year, she'd spent more time in the ringtail's company than she'd ever thought she would, and nearly all of it had been amicable, rather than hostile as it was the few times they'd crossed swords on cases. During that time, she'd gotten to know Sly and his Gang far more than she would have cared to if not for Coco. And she'd come to an odd conclusion.

She absolutely hated Sly Cooper the Master Thief, since he represented both her own failures in trying to fix the crime problem of the world and a world that law could not completely control. But Mr. Cooper, the father of Coco, was someone she could respect and even admire to a certain extent. And as much as she hated to admit it, Sly Cooper the civilian was someone she'd grown to like, and have certain thoughts about she felt she really shouldn't. Then again, getting as far in her career at 20 had meant sacrificing socialization when she was younger, meaning she'd never really dated...and now she technically had a kid with him. Certain thoughts were inevitable, and as much as she fought admitting it, he was easy on the eyes.

Her eyes lit up as she suddenly realized the opportunity Coco had given her, both to indulge her own desires and make Sly lose some of his confident swagger, all without actually giving anything away. As such, she reached past Sly's jacket, grabbed him by the tie he'd chosen to wear for some reason, and yanked him forward, locking lips with him, her tongue lunging past his lips as he gasped in shock.

She held the kiss for a full minute as she felt him start to run out of breath, before finally pulling back. "Think she's disappointed?" she breathed softly.

"Uh...I...uh..." Sly stammered out, completely poleaxed.

"Nope!" Coco proclaimed as she lowered a camera Carmelita hadn't noticed she was holding.

"You give me that camera, Coco!" Carmelita gasped out, her cheeks reddening as she took off after her.

Sly, for his part, slumped back in the booth with a goofy grin on his face. "...what a woman..."

When Mommy finally calmed down, all five of us gathered together to ride rides and enjoy other activities. The high point for the others was when I fell into Uncle Murray's pink cotton candy. For some reason, when I popped out of it I had the urge to call myself Pinkie Pie. I didn't act on it, though.

After that, we stayed for the fireworks...and then went out to dinner before enjoying the cake Murray had made. Best birthday ever.

Author's Note

No, Sly and Carmelita aren't "already an item" because of this scene. They're just both aware of their feelings for the other...and Carmelita is now able to catch Sly off guard with spontaneous romantic action as well, just like he does to her in the games.

Genin

Before the events I started this story on, my family gave me...a test. To see if I could handle myself and learned all the skills they'd passed onto me. Until I was able to successfully pass this test, I wasn't allowed to go with on the various heists Daddy went on with Uncle Murray and Uncle Bentley. Instead, I would stay in the van, usually in the lap of one of my Uncles. As such, I was really eager for when I was finally ready to take this test. Of course, it came in many stages...

Sly smiled down at Coco as she bounced eagerly back and forth, plainly looking forward to these tests. "Alright, Coco, pay attention now." He was pleased to see her immediately sit still and look straight up at him. "Before we can let you do anything regarding these heists, we need to make sure your skills are top notch. From everything we've all been able to determine, your skills naturally flow towards ninjitsu, and as such we've begun giving you a modified form of kunoichi training. Today, we'll test how much you've managed to absorb, and how well you've mastered your skills. I will be testing your stealth. Murray will test your speed and agility. Bentley will test your cunning. And Carmelita - when we drop you off with her - will test your...accuracy and diplomacy." He shook his head, uncertain how she intended to combine those two tests. Instead, he focused on the now, beckoning Murray.

Murray came in, carrying a training dummy that jingled with every step. He carefully set it down in front of Coco as Sly leaned against the wall.

"Here is your test on stealth," Sly explained. "This dummy has several gold coins and one other item of value in its pockets. However, its entire structure is laced with bells that will ring if they are jostled even slightly. Your goal is to get as many valuables out of the pockets as you can in five seconds, without making a sound." He reached over to the light switch. "And since you've been trained as a ninja, this must also be done...in total darkness. The test begins when I turn the light off, and ends when I turn the lights on, or if a single sound is heard." With that, he switched off the lights.

He barely - just barely - heard the sound of fabric shuffling, but chose to let that go, as it was so quiet he wasn't entirely sure it wasn't just his imagination. At the end of five seconds, he turned the switch back on, and heard loud jingling from his arm.

Turning, he saw that his arm was now festooned with every bell from the dummy sewn to his sleeve, and bits of fabric on a string falling away showed Sly both the fabric sounds he'd heard and how Coco had kept them quiet while she worked. Every coin from the dummy's pockets was arranged by size and value before Coco, and she herself was wearing the pendant that had been the extra treasure.

Murray's jaw dropped in shock. Sly smirked softly. "I think we can call that a pass."

For the test on speed and agility, Murray had set up a massive obstacle course with numerous paths, twists, turns, and obstacles of various sorts, the kind that would make the 'Ninja Warrior' shows he liked to watch whimper in envy. Straight down the middle of it was a path with only solid walls blocking it.

"Here's how it goes," Murray explained calmly. "You see that winner's circle at the other side?" Coco looked over to the large red button on the ground surrounded by a green circle, and nodded. "Your goal is to get there before I do. I will be taking the middle path, smashing through the walls. You can take any path you can maneuver except that one. When one of us depresses the button, the rest of the course will retract. Ready?"

Coco looked over the course for a while, determining the best path. Finally, she nodded. "Ready."

"Then go!" Murray yelled out, rushing down the central path. As he smashed through the first of ten walls, he reminded himself that he intended to grade her based on which course she took and how far along she was when he got there. Despite her progress, he didn't think she'd be able to make it to the end on any of the courses before he did. He'd designed it intentionally to prevent that, so as to also test how she dealt with defeat.

As such, he was quite surprised when the fourth wall lowered before him rather than stand up for him to smash through. As a result, he stumbled a bit, coming to a halt as he saw Coco sitting pretty in the winner's circle. "Wha?" he gasped out, stunned. "How-?" He paused as he noticed a twined thread rope hanging beside Coco.

Following it up, he saw it hooked to the rafters by sewing needles, like a makeshift grappling hook. Glancing back towards the start of the course, he saw a bit of thread caught on the rafters, obviously where Coco had climbed up before taking the upper route.

"You did say I could take any route I wanted, right?" Coco asked nervously, plainly worried she'd broken a rule.

Murray couldn't help but chuckle. "I sure did," he admitted. "Next time we test you, I'm making an outdoor course."

Bentley stared across the table at Coco. "Do you see the safe behind me?" he asked calmly.

"Uh huh," Coco muttered, sounding a bit distracted.

"It has a digital lock," Bentley explained calmly. "Inside is a small statuette. Your goal in this test is to somehow gain access to the statuette from me via trickery and cunning. If you can do that, you'll pass. If you attempt to input an incorrect code at any time, or open the safe by any means other than the code, you fail. Do you understand?" Coco didn't respond immediately. "Coco?"

Coco blinked. "Oh, sorry Uncle Bentley," she apologized. She pointed to where his computer was on. "I was distracted by that program you have running. What is it?"

"Oh, that?" Bentley asked, glancing over. "That's a hacking program I've been working on. With computers becoming more and more commonplace, I figured we'd encounter computer-based security systems before too much longer, and I wanted a special program to hack past any firewalls."

"Really?" Coco gasped eagerly. "That's fascinating! Can you tell me more?"

Bentley grinned eagerly, always happy to share this side of his work with Coco, who was always an appreciative audience. He immediately began explaining every detail of the program's workings, both in technical terms and - when he saw those went over her head - in more layman terms. He soon became so enveloped in explaining that he forgot what it was they were doing there.

After a time, Coco stood up. "Keep talking, Uncle Bentley," she encouraged. "I'm just gonna get you a drink."

Smiling, he nodded. "Thanks, I am getting a bit parched." He continued his explanation, pitching his voice so she could hear him.

"Say, what's the code for this fridge?" she called out, tapping the safe.

"37452," Bentely responded absentmindedly. It was only as he heard her typing as he jerked back. "Wait, that's not a-"

The safe beeped and swung open, and Coco removed the statuette. "So I pass?"

Bentley chuckled softly, rubbing the back of his head. "Clever girl..."

Carmelita walked calmly over to the shooting range at the local Interpol office. She'd encountered enough of her more honorable coworkers while on outings with Coco that her having a secretly adopted daughter was now an open secret amongst those working at that office, and they also knew it was worth their jobs to inquire any further into the matter. However, Coco had managed to be charming enough with those she'd met that they wouldn't dream of doing anything to upset her, let alone her mother. A few jokes had been made, but nothing beyond that...and all jokes had come to an end when Carmelita made it clear that anyone who made a joke where Coco could hear that needed to be explained to her would have to do so themselves with all their coworkers watching.

Coco walked behind her, flinching slightly each time a gunshot rang out. Her much stronger sense of hearing was doing a number on her here, and she knew she'd need to learn to deal with that eventually. Noticing her discomfort, however, Carmelita quickly slipped one of the range's shooting earmuffs over her head, protecting her sensitive ears.

She walked up to a group of rookies, watching them shoot for a while. When they finished, she looked over their performance and tsked. "My daughter can shoot better than that, and she can't even hold a gun," she chided irritably.

Most knew better than to take bait like that, but one of the newest recruits apparently had something to prove. "Oh yeah?" he demanded angrily, snorting defiance. "Prove it."

Carmelita nodded. "Four called shots on the metal target board with the weapon of your choice, against the same for Coco. You win, you get to skip the next week of lectures. She wins, you're scrubbing toilets for a week."

"Deal!" the rookie proclaimed, picking up his gun. "Two head, two center mass!" He let off four shots in quick succession.

When the metal sheet was drawn back to the front, it could be seen that his two head shots landed in each eye of the target, and one had landed in the center mass. The fourth had hit the hand of the drawn target, however. He tsked in irritation. "You're up, little girl!" he teased Coco.

Coco hopped up onto the gun bench in front of the next target over. She then beckoned one of the other rookies over. He came readily. "Blue," she said, pointing to the exact center of his chest. "Green," she added, pointing to right over his heart. "Yellow," she continued, pointing to the bridge of his nose between his eyes. "And Red," she concluded, pointing to just below his pelvis, making him back up and wince.

"What's that mean?" the challenged rookie demanded irritably.

Smiling, Coco reached into her mane and pulled out four sewing needles, each with a loop of thread tied through the eye, one each in the four colors she named. Turning, she hurled the needles at her target. With a loud sound of bent metal, the target came off its hook to fall to the floor. "Umm...could someone bring that back for me please?" she asked softly.

Carmelita glared at the rookie who'd taken the challenge. He walked out onto the range to pick up the target...and swallowed. Not only were the needles embedded in the sheet of metal so far that half the needle stuck out the back, and the needles were in exactly the position Coco had proclaimed, colors matched. Turning to see Carmelita's smug smirk, he sighed. "I'll get the toilet brush..."

"This was fun," Coco offered warmly. "Can we do it again sometime? Without anything on the line?"

The rookie managed a smile. "...sure."

Carmelita smiled proudly as she led Coco back out.

Two years of training, study, and enriching play had paid off well. I'd passed what my family considered the 'beginner' level of being a Master Thief. I still wasn't anywhere near Daddy's level, but I was good enough I could be trusted to handle myself on heists with supervision. It was a moment of great pride for me...and only the first of many.

What We Will Sea

And that catches up to where you joined our story, with us going after the ones who killed Grandpa and stole the book. Our mission was three fold. Recover the book, bring them to justice, and steal anything that won't make too much noise when we pry it up while making sure to leave enough evidence for Mom to put the bad guys away for a long time.

The first one we were going after was Sir Raleigh, a Frogman who started life as a spoiled noble and turned to piracy on a whim. I found even the idea of such a being severely distasteful. Born with everything he could ever want, and turning to a life of crime for the thrill of it? It made me sick, especially when I think about Dad's lot in life...and my own.

One thing was sure as we made our way to the Isle O'Wrath, his pirate base in Europe...I was going to enjoy watching him taken down. His machine skills wouldn't save him, and I looked forward to helping Uncle Bentley tear his creations apart.

The Isle O'Wrath was situated in the center of an area known as the Welsh Triangle, a part of the sea off the European Coast that was almost constantly barraged with bad storms. Once arriving, Sly leapt out of the van, Coco clinging to his back as they made their way onto the island itself, ready to explore and gather anything to assist them. Coco was only going to cling to Sly at first, until they reached a point where it made sense for them to split up. At that point, she'd be going her own way.

Her armaments were considered more than adequate. In addition to her own, smaller version of Sly's cane, she also had her sewing kit stocked with plenty of thread, needles, and fabric patches. In addition, there were bottles of dye for spot designs...as well as bottles that only looked like dye, which were actually filled with liquid to dip the needles in to give them various effects when thrown like darts. The largest contained a knock-out agent, which she considered the most useful.

As Sly walked, Coco took in her surroundings. The dark grey stone of the island was covered here and there with patches of green grass, showing where they'd need to be careful to keep from making noise or leaving traces. Her eyes moved to where most of the island was blocked off by a gate. "Think we can pick the lock?" she whispered.

"No," Sly countered as he stared through his binoculars. "I recognize the lock. It's hooked to an alarm. If anything that's not the right shape or material is put in - such as lock picks - it'll set off an alarm. We're going to have to go over."

"You mean you're going to throw me over the gate to open it for you from the other side?" Coco asked eagerly, her soft voice excited.

"We'll call that Plan B," Sly answered with a soft chuckle. "I was thinking we could climb up over there." He gestured to a structure near the gate, where a broken ladder hung carelessly. "That should give us a way up and over. Hold on tight."

Nodding, Coco clung tighter to Sly's back as he made his way across the open ground. Once up and over, they split to go to either side of a spotlight that swept over the path. As they approached a guard, Coco hurled one of her knockout needles before he caught sight of them. It penetrated his clothes and stuck in his back, sending him to la-la land. Coco retrieved the needle as they went by.

Not far beyond, they caught sight of a large boat with a strange device floating over it. "Gonna get a scan of that for Bentley?" Coco asked curiously.

"Already on it," Sly confirmed as he opened communications.

Bentley's voice came over the comm loud and clear. "Based on what I've been able to determine, that blimp is Raleigh's base of operations. But there's something off about it..."

"Looks more machiney than most blimps," Coco offered. "Almost looks like some sort of cloud sub, if that makes any sense-"

"No way!" Bentley interrupted, stunned. "Those are only theoretical!"

"What, cloud subs?" Sly asked jokingly.

"No!" Bentley corrected irritably. "That's a storm machine! It's what's generating the storms throughout the triangle, and those same storms are what's keeping it in the air!"

"Those storms explain all the wrecked ships," Sly murmured softly.

"But why would Raleigh want bad weather at his own hideout?" Bentley inquired.

"Probably because his pirate ships are designed for it," Coco suggested. "I mean, most ships are designed for peak function in normal weather but able to handle bad weather. Ships designed to function at their peak in bad weather, however, would be at a disadvantage - and possibly not even function - in good weather. That plus a machine that gives constant bad weather would be a huge advantage for a pirate."

Sly and Bentley were both silent for a time. Finally, Sly spoke up. "So which of us gets to wrench our shoulders over that one?" he asked teasingly.

"I think she gets to pick where we go for dinner once we take down Raleigh," Bentley offered warmly. "She's learned well."

"I can agree with both those points," Sly agreed, making Coco grin widely and clap her forehooves together.

"He's got the Book itself," Bentley mused. "Likely on that storm maker."

"Then we'll take it down...and down hard," Sly stated firmly.

Terrible Tides

With their final destination determined, Sly and Coco continued their way forward. So far, they had yet to find a good place to split up, or a need to as the path continued straight forward. Coco's hurled knock-out needles continued to keep their presence completely unknown, and Sly's superior agility allowed them to clear past the obstacles they encountered.

Towards the end of the path, a large vault with three tumblers - exactly like the ones Coco had trained on - sat at the side of the path. "I got this," she whispered, hopping off Sly's back and putting her ear to the vault. Before long, she had the code input and the vault open.

To Sly's surprise, it contained a page of the Thievius Raccoonus, covering a technique developed by Old Drake Cooper. "Good job, Coco," he whispered happily after they'd both finished dedicating the 'Fast Attack Dive' maneuver to memory. "This is the first step to recovering our legacy." Pocketing the page, he left the Gang's calling card - the blue raccoon mask - in the vault where the page had been.

Beyond the vault, a key in a cage sat directly in front of a locked gate. "This seems almost too easy..." Coco murmured worriedly.

"...the key's genuine," Sly whispered after examining it for a time. "And there aren't any traps on it or the gate."

"Then...why is it like this?" Coco demanded irritably. "It's just...a stupid way to do things!"

"I don't mind a stupid enemy," Sly replied readily, smashing the cage and taking the key, using it to open the gate. "It just makes this that much easier for us."

"...puts me on edge, is all," Coco offered petulantly. "Feels like a trap."

"And that's why we're careful," Sly reminded her. "We expect traps."

At the end of a tunnel, they were able to get a clearer view of the path to the blimp...which led through a veritable fortress. "With how secure that blimp is, it's becoming more and more obvious that it's Raleigh's base of operations."

"It's going to be next to impossible to get there," Bentley pointed out through the comms. "To get there, you'd need to sneak through that high voltage power tube over there." As he spoke, the viewer zoomed in on the tube in question, where arcs of electricity lashed back and forth through the tube.

"That's no problem," Coco offered. "We can just destroy the power generator right next to the tube's entrance."

"If you did that without unlocking the gate protecting it, the entire place will go up with alarms," Bentley warned. "You'll need three of those treasure keys to do that, and you only have one."

"Can you use a scan of the key to locate two more?" Sly asked curiously.

"Does Murray have portion control issues?" Bentley joked.

"Hey!" Murray's voice complained, causing Coco to giggle.

After a time, Bentley spoke up. "I've located the keys," he explained as the viewer shifted to lock onto two tunnels that appeared to be glowing. "The holo-circuitry in your masks are now programmed to illuminate the direction of those objectives as we locate them. Good luck, and make sure Coco doesn't get hurt, Sly."

"I can take care of myself," Coco complained dryly. "I passed those tests..."

"That only makes you Genin," Sly chided gently. "I won't be letting you take your own objectives without me until you're at least Chuunin."

"But you said I couldn't take that until I was at least eight!" Coco whined.

"Exactly," Sly confirmed. "I want to be sure you're physically up to the extended trials a solo objective would put on you."

As they made their way to their first objective, a speech from Raleigh over the intercom explained his real methods. "So that's it," Sly murmured softly. "He uses the terrible weather to sink ships, then just goes in and 'salvages' the loot."

"So he's lazy as well?" Coco grumbled. "I'd have been able to respect his methods if my theory about storm powered ships had been right...but this? Dad, do we have to let Mom get him in one piece?"

Sly glanced down sharply at Coco. "Coco, that's enough," he chided firmly. "I understand why you'd have no good feelings towards this guy, as he's one of the ones that killed my Dad, your Grandfather. But we are thieves, not assassins. We use no more force than absolutely necessary to achieve our objectives, and we go out of our way to not cause physical harm in the process. That's what makes the Cooper Clan master thieves. If you stray from that, you take the first step on the slippery slope to become the monsters we hunt."

Coco flinched back from the intense scolding. "O-okay, Daddy," she whimpered. "I...I'm sorry..."

Sly shifted Coco into his arms, gently stroking her head. "It's alright, Coco. You're still so young, so your emotions are a lot more volatile and intense for you, and it's harder to remember the reasons behind the rules you have to follow. It's why discipline is so important. You've been doing wonderfully...just don't lose yourself."

Nodding, Coco clambered out of the embrace and back to Sly's back. "I'll remember. L-let's go."

Sly stared at her for a time, then nodded. Turning, he headed for the second key.

Treasure Hunt

The first Treasure Key was hidden inside an area of heavy machinery. As Sly stepped in, he saw that the narrow path was lined with furnaces, their doors open with flames spewing out. Thankfully, they weren't held open, and a quick strike of his cane snapped them closed. A quick thrown needle from Coco also knocked out the guard that would have otherwise spotted them. Beyond, a looping path over water spiraled upward.

"Eureka!" Bentley proclaimed through the comms. "You're in the engine room. Calculations indicate the Treasure Key is at the source of that spinning crankshaft. While you're there, you can also sabotage Raleigh's machine while you're at it. But be careful not to fall, Sly. Coco still doesn't know how to swim!"

"And that wasn't something you felt I should know before we brought her on a major operation on an island?" Sly demanded coldly.

"Sorry, Sly," Murray offered apologetically. "It slipped my mind..."

Rolling his eyes, Sly sighed ruefully. "Never mind. I just won't fall. Don't let go of me, Coco."

"I won't, Daddy," Coco promised, clutching tightly to him.

Sly continued to move carefully past each part of the machinery they encountered, avoiding flames, collapsing platforms, and electrified spinning blades, keeping his focus on maneuvering while letting Coco focus on keeping them from being discovered. The only minor problem that occurred was when Sly had to cling upside down to a pipe and shimmy his way along it over an electrified turbine. Before he'd made it even a foot, he quickly discovered Coco couldn't cling to his shoulders upside down.

"Any ideas, Bentley?" Sly asked worriedly.

"I'm thinking, I'm thinking!"

Coco looked at the situation for a time, glancing from her hooked cane to her sewing kit to the pipe. As her eyes trailed to Sly's hooked cane, she smiled. "I think I have an idea," she spoke up. "Daddy, can I borrow the Treasure Key we've already acquired?"

Blinking, Sly nodded. "Alright," he agreed, handing it over. "But what are you going to do?"

Smiling, Coco hooked her cane through the key, shifting it down to where it could spin freely but wouldn't fly off. Pulling out her thread, she quickly sewed a great deal onto the key, before using even more to make a net between two parts of the thin pipe. She then hopped into the net. "Pull the net down, Daddy," she instructed.

Confused, Sly grabbed the net and pulled down, causing the thread to stretch. He grinned as he understood. "You want me to catapult you over to the other side, and you turned the key into a propeller so you can hover down slowly so I'll have time to get over there to catch you. Clever."

"Aww!" Coco pouted. "I wanted to surprise you!"

"Where do you think you get the brain for these ideas from, Coco?" Sly asked teasingly as he set her to the proper angle.

"From Mommy!" Coco proclaimed happily, giggling wickedly.

"Ooooh!" Bentley and Murray called out from the comms.

Chuckling, Sly launched Coco into the air, slipped the net off the pipes, stuffed it under his hat, and raced across the pipes as quickly and safely as he could go. The propeller part of the plan worked, and Coco slowly floated down right into Sly's arms as he reached the other side.

"Nicely done," Sly praised, giving the net back to Coco so she could stuff it back into her sewing kit. She smiled widely, blushing at the praise.

Deeper into the engine room, near the core, the pair came across a safe. Coco quickly opened it, revealing yet another page of the Thievius Raccoonus, this one covering a technique of 'Old Sally Cooper's, the Fast Getaway Raccoon Roll. Once Sly and Coco had dedicated the technique to memory, Sly pocketed the page, leaving behind the mask calling card.

With the page in hand, the pair entered the core of the engine, making their way through to the center where the Key was stored. With Treasure Key in hoof (Sly decided to let Coco hang onto this one), the pair made their way out of the engine room, to tackle the next objective.

As it turned out, the third Treasure Key was stored inside what looked very much like a Treasure Room. "Well, well, well...jackpot," Sly mused. "Coco, ready to tackle the next part of being a Master Thief?"

"Stealing everything that won't make too much noise when we pry out the nails?" Coco asked eagerly.

"Exactly," Sly confirmed. "You've been trained to recognize things of value, so snatch anything you can carry, balanced to maximize value of your heist. While we're at it, I'll also see if I can spot the Treasure Key."

Coco nodded, her mane bouncing behind her with her excitement. "And keep an eye out for traps, right?"

"Very good," Sly praised, leading the way forward.

As they made their way down the corridor, they came across several laser traps, with lasers moving up and down the walls to zap anyone passing through without clearance. Coco actually had an easier time getting past these obstacles than Sly did, as she was small and fast enough to dodge between the lasers. This let her reach the safe long before Sly did, and she immediately went to work opening it, finding a sheet of blueprints inside.

"Coco, those are blueprints for Raleigh's entire operation!" Bentley proclaimed through her Mask-Viewer. "And...yes! I can wire this information directly to the both of you! It should help you find anything useful for taking him down!"

Coco eagerly pocketed the page, putting the raccoon mask calling card in the safe just as Sly showed up, getting pet between the ears as praise for her work. This left her quite eager to continue, but unfortunately, the path forward led across another large pool of water with small platforms crossing it, forcing Coco to once more cling to Sly and let him carry her across, dodging lasers as they went.

Once across the water, the pair made their way across a bridge to a raised platform in the center, collecting the third Treasure Key. "Time to make use of these Keys," Sly mused, turning to lead the way back out to the Grounds.

The Frog Prince

With all the keys and pages they could gather from the grounds collected, the pair made their way to the high voltage tube, opening the gate and shutting off the generator. With the electricity shut off, Sly was able to walk through the tube easily with Coco clinging to his back. As they made their way through, Bentley called them on the Binoc-u-com.

"I've found a way up to Raleigh's hide-out, but..." he began slowly.

"But?" Coco coached cautiously.

"The only way to manage it is...well..."

"Shooting ourselves out of that cannon that's locked down?" Sly prompted, shifting to examine it.

"Yeah, pretty much," Bentley confirmed. "You're going to need all seven of Raleigh's Treasure Keys to access it."

"That's two more to go," Coco spoke up happily. "Good thing we grabbed everything we came across on our way in."

"That's the way of the Master Thief," Sly agreed.

"I'll mark the area where you can find the last two keys," Bentley concluded. "Be careful, you two."

"Says the guy who suggested we shoot ourselves out of a cannon," Sly teased as they broke communications, making Coco giggle.

The first objective marked to collect a Treasure Key was actually inside a submersible at the edge of a dock. Once inside, the sub carried the pair into the depths, where the Treasure Key floated in the center.

"Sly, Coco!" Bentley called out through the Binoc-u-com. "You've found where Raleigh's crab soldiers keep his treasure...but you'll have to fight them off before you can take the Key. The sub is armed, so use its guns to take them down."

"Let me, Daddy," Coco offered. "I'm better at ranged combat than you are."

"Be my guest," Sly allowed as the crabs started to come out. "You take the guns, I'll take the sub."

The division of tasks worked wonderfully as Sly piloted the sub to evade the crabs' assaults while Coco spun the turrets to fire on them. In order to access the Treasure Key, they also needed to break open 40 chests and collect their contents without letting the crabs get any into a tube...which they did so flawlessly.

With Treasure Key acquired, they returned to the surface.

The last mission objective led through an entrance at the top of the main building, to a sea level area filled with crashed ships. Based on what could be heard from Raleigh over the loudspeakers, they were quickly able to determine that this was where Raleigh's men dragged sunken ships so their cargo could be unloaded at their leisure. It also revealed that Raleigh knew that someone was after the Treasure Keys, and wanted them stopped.

"Well it's about time," Sly chuckled in mild amusement as he heard that. "We've only got one key left. Wonder what tipped him off?"

"Probably shutting off the generator," Coco suggested. "Even if alarms didn't go off, he works with machines. He had to have noticed the drop in power."

"Good thing we waited on that until we'd grabbed everything we could on the other side, then," Sly agreed, making his way forward.

As the pair explored the enclosed area, they discovered it wasn't just boats that had been dragged in there. Crashed planes hung from the rafters, their propellers idly spinning in every breeze. Thankfully, the area was relatively small, and it was easy enough for the pair to make their way to the Treasure Key, which was positioned right in front of the safe.

Cracking it open, Coco discovered another page of the Thievius Raccoonus, this one covering Karin Coopergiwa's Coin Magnet Technique, which involved applying a special coat to the metal of the Cooper Hook - or any metal in a thief's possession - to draw the coins used as currency to the Master Thief, making it much easier to gather funds for more complex heists. With the technique memorized, the calling card was left in the page's place, and the Treasure Key was acquired.

With all seven Keys gathered, Sly unlocked the cannon and aimed it straight at the blimp. "Ready Coco?" he asked softly.

"Ready," Coco confirmed confidently.

Smiling, Sly hopped into the cannon, closing them both in just before it went off, propelling them both into the air and safely through the glass window wall of the blimp. As they landed, they found themselves in a wide open chamber filled with machinery. On the opposite side of the room, Raleigh the frog sat upon a red velvet throne, wearing a much patched pirate hat that was taller than his entire body. "How delightful," he proclaimed warmly. "We have a guest. The only thing is..." His voice changed to have a great deal of anger behind it. "I hate unexpected guests!" he proclaimed angrily.

"Listen Raleigh," Sly countered coldly, "wipe out my family and take what's mine, and you'd better expect company."

"Oh, I'm ever so-" Raleigh began.

"Could we skip the pleasantries?" Coco asked hopefully. "Even by Thief hours, it's getting close to my bedtime. I'd like it if we could resolve this - one way or the other - before then. I get really cranky when I miss my bedtime."

Sly couldn't stop himself from chuckling, both at Coco's words and at Raleigh's expression. "Trust me, you wouldn't like her when she's cranky."

"You think I'm just a joke?" Raleigh demanded angrily. "I will crush you both like the insignificant pests you are!"

"How are you going to do that?" Coco asked curiously. "Do you have a mechanical apparatus hooked into the blimp connected to a wand to let you shoot us with lightning, blasts of wind, or frigid rain? Or maybe you've built yourself a robo-exo-suit that's going to fold out of your throne there so you can crush us with hands of steel? Or maybe your throne will drop out of the blimp before sealing the place off with us in it and exploding, letting you use the backup storm-blimp to continue your reign of terror across the tides?"

Raleigh blinked for a time. "...actually, I was just going to bloat myself up to immense size and try to jump on you to squash you, but those sound much better, and I think I could manage the first one. Do you think you could step into the next room for an hour or so and let me get that set up?"

"Unfortunately, Coco's bedtime is in half an hour," Sly teased somewhat playfully. "So it looks like you're out of luck."

"You think I can't handle you with only my own strength?" Raleigh roared in fury. "I can still bloat to massive size and flatten-"

An audible shing sound heralded Coco drawing some of her drugged needles. "So, he doesn't have any body armor...how strong a knock-out dose for something his size, Daddy? A 1, a 2, or a 3?"

"Probably a 1," Sly suggested. "Even if he bloats up, that's mostly air. A 2 would probably be lethal."

"1 it is," Coco agreed as she put the two longer needles away. "And bloated up, he's almost too easy a target. Bet I can get him right between the eyes without damaging either one, even if he moves."

"You're on!" Sly praised. "Once he's out cold, I'll shut off the storm machine and rewire his communicators so Carmelita can find this place."

Even though he hadn't bloated himself up yet, Raleigh seemed to deflate on himself. "...well that's not fair at all..." he whined.

Coco smiled as she took a proper stance to throw the needle. "I'd give a better response to that, but I'm only six. I'm not allowed to use those words." Her needle flew true, embedding right between Raleigh's eyes and knocking him out instantly.

As Sly went to the communicators, Coco went to Raleigh's unconscious form, carefully extracting her needle so as to leave no evidence, while also searching his body. She eventually found a key, allowing her to unlock Raleigh's safe. "Daddy, look!"

Inside the safe, several pages of the Thievius Raccoonus resided, containing detailed instructions on performing Ryoichi Cooper's Spire Jump technique, along with documentation covering the business and base of Muggshot - another of the Fiendish Five - in Utah. "Good find, Coco," Sly praised. "One down, four to go."

Sunset Scenario

Because of the broadcasts Dad set up, Mom was able to swoop in with her men to bust Raleigh and his crew for all his crimes, and we made a clean getaway without problems as we'd already made it back to the van by the time Mom arrived. Mom got credit for the bust, and we got the pages we needed, and the name and location of the next member of the Fiendish Five. Muggshot was based specifically in Mesa City in Utah.

It was a long trip there, during which Dad put a lot of thought into that conveniently placed page of the Thievius Raccoonus. He definitely felt there was something fishy about it, but for the life of him, he couldn't put together what. No matter how he tried to make sense of it, nothing beyond 'coincidence' fit in any known realm of physics we understood. Uncle Murray's suggestion - that this just meant that whatever explained it wasn't necessarily bound by the physics we knew - was far too disquieting to give serious consideration to as of yet, so we eventually accepted it as a lucky coincidence. That sometimes happened for Master Thieves, after all.

Instead, we turned our focus to researching Muggshot himself. I won't say much about what we learned of his past, but it did make me glad that there was no chance I'd ever end up in the public school system. Even so, it passed the time well until we arrived in Mesa City...

The van pulled to a halt at the end of the stable road winding around the stone pillar that led to Mesa City. Beyond there, a stone bridge stretched over the deep chasm below, not strong enough to support the van and everyone in it driving across it. While not the only entrance to the city, careful study showed it was the least guarded by patrols as nature did a good job keeping anyone from using this route. While an effective deterrent to law enforcement, a momentary obstacle at best for Coopers.

Climbing up to the top of the gate barring the path, Sly and Coco gazed out over the city as Bentley gave them information through the Binoc-u-com. "Sly...didn't you say Mesa City was going to be loud and boisterous?" he asked worriedly.

"That's what the papers said," Sly confirmed. "It was going to make it easier to sneak through the place."

Coco took in the damaged buildings, the dead signs, and the tumbleweeds. "It looks like a ghost town. ...are there such things as ghosts?"

"Normally I'd say no," Bentley began, "but since it's the pony from a world of 'magic' asking, I can only say that no one has ever reported a viable sighting."

"My thief training says that just means no one's reported one," Coco whimpered, clinging tightly to Sly.

"Don't worry, Coco," Sly offered comfortingly. "Look at all the poles sticking up out the top of the roofs. We won't even have to go into the streets to make our way in. We can take the high road with the Ninja Spire Jump."

"That's a relief," Coco breathed out, relaxing. "And I think I just spotted a thug, so it's not a complete ghost town." She reached for her needles.

"Don't knock him out unless we need to to get past him," Sly cautioned. "The longer we go without doing that, the longer it'll take before Muggshot learns we're here."

Sighing, Coco nodded and lowered her hoof. "Let's go, Daddy."

Hopping from strung light to strung light, Sly was able to make his way part way in. At one point, he had to hop down to ground level, which drew the attention of a large guard dog who sat up from his bone to growl threateningly. Sly got ready to act, but felt Coco leaping off his back, kicking off a stone wall near the dog to land at its side, scratching it behind one ear as she stuffed a plushy into its mouth. The dog began to pant happily, its tail wagging and its leg jerking as it worried at the plushy. After a time, its eyes slipped closed and it slumped to the ground, snoring. "Good puppy," Coco whispered softly, stroking its head before rushing back to Sly's back, slipping the plushy out of the dog's mouth in the process.

"What's in that plushy?" Sly asked curiously.

"Chemically enhanced turkey flavoring," Coco explained. "Makes the systems sluggish and encourages sleep. Between that and the relaxing caresses, it'll be out for an hour at least."

"Clever," Sly praised. "Just keep it away from Murray." Coco burst into giggles at that.

It wasn't the only guard dog the pair encountered on the way into the city, but each was dealt with the same way, and the scent of the other guard dogs' saliva on the plushy made each successive guard dog that much more trusting, as they all apparently came from the same kennel.

Before long, they caught sight of a passage lined with blinking lights on the floor. Coco immediately recognized it from Bentley's lessons. "Electronic floor sensors," she whispered. "They'll fry us if we step on them while they're lit up."

"Then we won't do that," Sly offered teasingly, moving swiftly past the obstacle.

At that point, the only path forward led past guards, forcing Coco to make use of her knock-out needles. "At least this way they won't know for sure where we entered from, since we left conscious guards behind us, right?" she asked hopefully.

"Very good, Coco," Sly praised, stroking her mane. "That's exactly right."

A brief detour from the main path to a distant pinnacle led the pair to the Vault, which Coco was able to easily open. This revealed yet another page of the Thievius Raccoonus, this one covering Rob McCooper's 'Explosive Hat' technique, which involved infusing inner energy into copies of one's hat to turn it into a mine that could be lobbed out where guards might stumble across it, knocking themselves out from the release of energy.

As the pair made their way to the end of the path where - once again - the first Treasure Key was right in front of the locked gate into the rest of the city, Coco voiced a curious question. "How come they leave these things out like this? The vaults with the pages, I mean."

Sly stroked his chin thoughtfully. "Not sure. But it's helpful for us, isn't it?"

Turf Wars

With the gate open, the pair made their way through a short tunnel to the rest of the city. Once on an overlook, they moved along until they were able to get a view of the central building, with a neon sign reading 'Muggshot' at the top of it, along with a giant inflatable character of himself - a large gray bulldog, tall and muscular - floating over the roof. "Well, he's certainly not shy..." Coco muttered dryly.

"How are we supposed to find him, though?" Bentley asked through the Binoc-u-comm. "Mesa City's a big place."

"Maybe the big building with his name on it?" Coco asked speculatively. "Don't dogs like to mark their territory?"

"And that would explain the giant fire hydrant on the roof," Sly added, focusing in on the named structure.

"Logical," Bentley admitted. "You still need to find a way to break into the base of the building."

Sly shifted the lock on, noticing a crimson convertible held in place with three Treasure Locks. "I think I've got something..." he purred softly.

"So more hunting Treasure Keys?" Coco asked quietly. "This should be fun."

The first Treasure Key was at an old building on the edge of town, out of reach for any attempts Sly or Coco would make to retrieve it. Fortunately, that wasn't the plan. "Here's the deal," Sly explained to Coco. "Murray's going to be making a run for that key, and there are going to be guards and the like along the path. We're going to cover him from here-"

"I can't throw my needles that far!" Coco squeaked out in shock. "Well...not with any accuracy, anyway..."

"That's why you're going to use this blasting station we've commandeered," Sly continued, pointing to the terminal in front of the mounted gun turret. "You're the better shot, so you're going to be scanning ahead of Murray and clearing his path. "Can you do that?"

Coco nodded slowly. "I...think so..." Walking up, she checked the controls and smiled. "Yeah. I don't need thumbs for the buttons. I'm ready."

Nodding, Sly lifted his Binoc-u-com. "We're ready to go, Murray."

"Got it Sly!" Murray replied. Shortly thereafter, he became visible on the trail.

Coco focused on and through the turret before her, taking out locked gates and charging thugs with equal alacrity. Once she saw that thugs came out of garages, she focused on each garage as Murray approached them, taking a shot as soon as the door started to open and taking out the thug inside before they could even start rushing. She also made sure to take out the explosive barrels that lined part of the path well before Murray got in reach, so that the explosion didn't injure him.

Within a few minutes, Murray had reached the Treasure Key, taking it back to the van to be transferred to Sly.

As Sly and Coco began to explore again, they got a brief message from Bentley informing them that Murray had gone to grab a snack and somehow come back with a second Treasure Key from winning a race. After chuckling together a bit about that, the pair made their way into one of the larger buildings, a casino by appearances. As they approached, they knew defenses would be high as Muggshot announced over loudspeakers that 'a cop was sniffing around', and ordering a high alert.

"Mommy must be coming," Coco whispered happily, her eyes beaming.

"Hope not too soon," Sly whispered back. "We still need to get the Thievius Raccoonus pages and take out Muggshot before she gets here. Otherwise things get dicey."

Once inside the casino, Sly cut the power both to open the front gate and to give them shadows to hide in as they made their way inside. They made their way over the top of the slot machines, carefully avoiding the machine gun wielding guards. Coco couldn't carelessly knock them out with her needles, as seeing one of their fellows drop would put the others on high alert.

Once the last of the guards were down, Coco hopped off Sly's back. "I'm gonna take a look forward-whoops!" Slipping off the slot machine, she caught hold of the arm, tugging it down as she slowly slipped to the floor. "I'm okay!" she whispered as the tumblers spun. When they stopped, the bells started ringing as coins started spilling out, burying Coco. "...still okay," she mumbled from under the massive pile. "Bentley provided a super tough fabric for me to make my thief suit out of."

"That's...different," Sly mused, hopping down. Picking up a handful of the coins, he tried a few other slot machines...only for them to constantly come up with mismatched symbols that gave nothing back. "And this is why I don't gamble-"

Another series of bells and whistles called Sly's attention to another slot machine, where Coco was once more being buried under a jackpot. "I was just curious," she offered contritely.

Rolling his eyes, Sly pocketed the coins. He'd have to trade them on the black market for a major discount before taking Muggshot down to get any value out of them, but it would still be a profit. "In that case, we won't go to any casino until you're of legal gambling age," he concluded firmly, scooping her back to his shoulders.

Continued exploration of the casino proved exceptionally frustrating, as the lower levels seemed to be flooded, with the craps tables and roulette wheels turned into floating platforms Sly had to jump across carefully with Coco clinging to his back. On top of that, the vault was on one of those floating platforms, making Coco nervous as she rolled the tumblers, and she gave them an extra spin just to make sure she'd heard them click right.

Inside was another page of the Raccoonus, this one covering B.F. Cooper's meditation technique that allowed one to maintain absolute focus in times of inactivity, making it seem as though the world around the user was moving faster than normal. With the page memorized and pocketed, they went on to the giant floating roulette wheel where the Treasure Key was protected. The security was disabled by leaping onto the green space three times, letting the pair grab the Treasure Key.

"Four down," Coco murmured softly. "Think it's going to be seven keys total like last time?"

"We'll find out," Sly replied as he took them back out.

Dance at Dusk

With the Treasure Keys in hand, Sly and Coco made their way back to the area in front of Muggshot's building. Seeing nowhere else they could explore from there, they unlocked the revving car Sly had spotted when they first arrived, setting it loose to crash into the wall around the hotel entrance. With the wall smashed, they made their way inside, knocking out the guards until they came to a wall with Muggshot's face jutting out from it larger than life, jutting teeth, cigar, and all. Bentley managed to find something interesting about it, however.

"Sly, my X-Ray detection reveals a secret elevator behind that massive face," Bentley revealed over the Binoc-u-com. "It goes straight to the penthouse, which is where we should find Muggshot."

"So how do we get in?" Sly demanded quickly.

"I'm guessing that wall locked with seven Treasure Locks," Coco offered, pointing off to the corner where she'd spotted said wall.

"That's right, Coco!" Bentley confirmed. "There's a lever behind it that summons the elevator."

"Meaning Muggshot will know it's us before we even get to the top," Sly muttered worriedly. "Still, it's our only option..."

"Key hunting time!" Coco whispered happily.

The first area they went to in search of Treasure Keys was the roof access, where a key was plainly visible in a trapped skylight. Sly made his way to the neon signs along the roof, climbing across them in search of the way to disable the security system. The roof was sparsely patrolled, with only a couple guards and some guard dogs. All were dealt with readily and silently.

Coco clung tightly to Sly's back as they explored the roof, knowing that if she moved too much she could upset his balance, and one or both of them might go tumbling off the roof and to the ground far below, barring sturdy flagpoles to catch with their canes. As they made their way to the top of the building, Muggshot started threatening 'the thieves making off with all his Treasure Keys', but neither of them really paid much attention to it, leaving it to Bentley and Murray to analyze the broadcast for any clues to help them with their heist.

At the very top, they found the vault, which Coco quickly cracked. Inside were the blueprints for Muggshot's alterations to Mesa City, which were quickly pocketed as they filled in everything Bentley didn't know about the place. There weren't any controls for the security system as they'd hoped, but there was a crane with a heavy weight hanging out directly above the Treasure Key skylight. Riding the weight down, the pair grabbed the Treasure Key with no problems.

The next area the pair explored was the rooftops of the back alley behind the hotel, clambering up and down the outside of the buildings as they made their way in the direction Bentley's scanners indicated the Treasure Key waited in. As they moved, the greatest threat to them proved to be spotlights - backed up by machine guns - that swept across the sides and roofs of the buildings in regular patterns. What few guards there were patrolling the area were easy enough to deal with.

At the very edge of the rooftops, they found both the vault and the Treasure Key. Inside the Vault was a technique developed by Suzanne Cooper to kick off the surface of the water - whether flat or turbulent - to regain dry land without getting wet or leaving a trace of passage. "This is going to be very useful," Coco murmured happily as they memorized the technique. Taking it and the Treasure Key, the pair made their way back inside.

The final Treasure Key was in another area of the rooftops, specifically in a jewel case near Muggshot's penthouse. This forced the pair to detour over another section of rooftops, which at first seemed relatively clear. However, this proved a mistaken impression as Carmelita dropped in on the rooftops across the road.

"Sly, you aren't really carrying Coco around across rooftops like this, are you?" she demanded coldly. "Do you have any idea how dangerous that is?"

"Come now, Miss Fox," Sly offered teasingly. "You should know by now I don't misstep when it counts. What took you so long? I was afraid you took a wrong turn on your way here. I thought we'd left plenty of clues."

"How did you even know where to go?" Carmelita demanded coldly. "You weren't in long enough to copy the pages in the file."

"I'm afraid that was Coco's doing," Sly apologized. "Her plan A was to keep you distracted with reading her a story while I swiped the file. Her plan B was to photograph the file using the camera hidden in her storybook. I was rather disappointed she'd pull tricks like that on you, and for punishment she's not getting any dessert until the whole Thievius Raccoonus is recovered."

Carmelita chuckled softly. "Classic sting there. She learned too well from both of us."

"That she did," Sly agreed. "You aren't mad?"

"It's sapient nature for children to try and trick their parents," Carmelita responded readily. "It's part of growing up and testing limits. With how accommodating and obedient she'd been otherwise, I was worried she wouldn't develop a spine when she needed it. I'm honestly relieved to know she will take independent action when she thinks it's warranted. And at least her motives were noble."

"I'm glad to hear that didn't upset you," Sly offered warmly. "I'll do my best to keep her on a shorter leash in the future, though."

"I think it's you who needs to be kept chained, ringtail," Carmelita taunted as she leveled her shock pistol. "Take one step forward, and you'll be in range for me to start shooting. Once I have you stunned, I'll drag you straight off to jail."

"Then it's a good thing it's time to take a step back, huh?" Coco asked softly, climbing back up to Sly's shoulders.

"Coco?" Sly gasped, shocked. "Where did you go? When did you go?"

"Once you and Mom started flirting, I went off after the vault and Treasure Key," Coco explained gently, holding out a page of the Thievius Raccoonus. "I was light enough I could cross the weaker paths without collapsing them, so I made it safely back."

Sly grinned as he took the page - covering Sir Andrew Cooper's Thief Replica Technique, which allowed the user to make convincing inanimate body doubles to confuse pursuers - and quickly memorized it before pocketing it and the Key. "Good girl, Coco. Very impressive. You didn't take any risks, did you? Or leave any evidence?"

"Nope!" Coco offered proudly. "I even closed up the jewelry case and vault behind me! No one will even know I was there for a while."

Chuckling, Sly waved to Carmelita. "Guess we'll be doing this some other time," he offered, leaping back off the roof.

"Bye Mommy!" Coco called out as they disappeared out of sight.

Sighing, Carmelita holstered her shock pistol and shook her head ruefully. "That girl..." she whispered affectionately.

Bad Dog, No Biscuit

With the seven keys in hand, Sly and Coco returned to the floor of the massive hotel complex. Once all seven locks were unlocked, the wall spun around, revealing the lever they knew was hidden there. "You ready, Coco?" Sly asked softly. "This guy we're going up against is going to be pretty big. I don't think your knock out needles are going to be effective."

"I didn't think they would," Coco responded softly. "But I've prepared something else that I think will work somewhat. Do you have a gas mask?"

Sly blinked in surprise. "Well, yeah, but why?"

"For Plan B," Coco replied, nestling into Sly's back. "Pull the lever."

Reaching out, Sly grabbed hold of the lever, only to accidentally press a button on his cane, triggering the 'eject seat' on the back of his coat, meant to give Coco a quick exit if they were in trouble.

"Wrong lever..." Coco whispered into the comms as she was propelled towards the ceiling. Thinking quickly, she caught hold of a light cord with her cane hook and slid back down to more reasonable height, plopping back down onto Sly's back. "...why do you even have that lever?" she asked petulantly.

"Your Mom insisted," Sly replied contritely, hoping to ameliorate his daughter's antipathy. He pulled the lever he meant to pull.

The giant Muggshot face opened its mouth, extending a tongue-like set of stairs leading to an elevator door.Nodding to each other, the pair boarded the elevator, riding it up into the fire hydrant shaped penthouse.

As they arrived, they found themselves in a large single chamber, a wide open floor between themselves and a large throne-like chair, upon which sat the biggest bull dog they'd ever seen. He easily stood twice Sly's height, with a pale purple coat over his heavily muscled limbs, with a dark blue mustache and eyebrows. "What?" he demanded as he caught sight of Sly and Coco. "My boys have been yapping about some big mysterious dude running around cracking skulls and...and this is it?" He burst into laughter. "Daddy-Daughter Duo with sticks? I didn't know it was take your kid to work day!" He paused, his eyes narrowing. "Wait a second...I've seen that stick before..."

"When my father knocked your block off with it, perhaps?" Sly suggested tauntingly.

"Your father?" Muggshot gasped in surprise. "You lot are Coopers? Wow." He smirked impudently. "You know, that Thingumus Raccoonus had a lot of nice pictures, but way too many big words."

Coco blinked. "Wow. That's...sad."

Muggshot frowned. "What is?"

"I'm six and I have no trouble with the language in the Thievius Raccoonus," Coco pointed out. "And yet you do. That's...just sad."

"So, if it's no good to you, can we have it back?" Sly asked hopefully.

Muggshot shot to his feet. "You break into my place, steal my stuff, trash the joint, insult me to my face, and have the gall to ask for handouts? I feel transgressed and violated-"

"Get the ball!" Coco called out, hurling a ball at Muggshot.

Muggshot backhanded it out the window. "Just cause I don't get big words doesn't mean I'm stupid! I saw what you did to my guard dogs! That ball was laced with something to knock me out, wasn't it? And it'd release either when I bit it or by blowing up in a cloud!"

Coco blinked. "Uh...Plan C, Daddy?" she asked hopefully.

"C stands for Cane," Sly agreed, readying himself for battle.

Muggshot shifted into a fighting stance, then paused. "Listen...could ya maybe set your little girl aside? I got no qualms with smashing you into paste in front of her, but actually pasting a minor would leave a bad taste in my mouth."

Sly hesitated, but Coco hopped off his back. "I'll wait in the upper floors," she promised, heading over to an elevator and riding it up.

Muggshot smirked. "Nice kid. Reminds me o' me before I started bulking up." He glanced over at Sly. "If I end up winning this, I'll keep an eye out for her, make sure that Seft fellow doesn't get ahold of her."

"You heard about that?" Sly asked in surprise.

"The whole criminal underworld knows about that bastid'," Muggshot confirmed. "And offin' yer old man weren't nothin' personal. It's all business, but I don't let that get in the way of looking out for youngins."

"I appreciate the gesture," Sly offered gratefully, sincerely, "but I seriously doubt you'll be the one walking away from this."

"That's the spirit!" Muggshot proclaimed happily, lumbering over on his oversized arms like a gorilla before pulling out his twin tommy guns and firing them off.

Grates fell down around the outside fo the room, sealing it off. At the same time, large glass crystals and rotating mirrors fell to the floor. Quickly seeing a solution, Sly raced ahead of Muggshot, rotating the mirrors to shine light into the crystals. As they all illuminated, the focused light burned Muggshot and overheated his guns.

"Dammit!" he snapped out angrily. "Ah well, I've got another set upstairs." Racing over, he rode an elevator up to the second floor of the penthouse...at which point Coco rotated the last mirror on that floor into place. "GYAH! Why you little-" Retreating to the elevator, he rode up to the chandelier...where he saw too late all but one of the mirror's already in place. "Aww, hell naw-"

Coco, having hitched a ride up on the elevator, flipped over his back to strike the last mirror, spinning it into place before bracing herself on a lamp on one of the cables holding it up using the Spire Jump technique. As Muggshot collapsed back onto the chandelier, Sly rode the other elevator up to that level.

To their surprise, Muggshot started to chuckle. "I thought the only way I could beat the bigger and stronger guys...was ta get bigger and stronger than them. But you two! Ya beat me fair and square by tag teaming me, and using my own place against me. I think youse two can look out for yourselves. ...the rest of the pictures I got are in my safe behind my throne, but if you want the rest, you're gonna need to head to Haiti and cross paths with Mz. Ruby. But don't think you'll have as easy a time with her as you did with me. She won't pull the punches I did. Dark that lady is..." With that, he lost consciousness.

Muggshot wasn't all that bad, really. The idealistic little pup that just didn't want to be picked on anymore was still in there. I let Mom know about that when the opportunity presented itself, in hopes he could actually find a way to be a good dog again.

The pages in Muggshot's vault contained an entry from 'Tennessee Kid' Cooper, a gun-slinging Cooper from the Olde West times. The techniques the pages covered were the Rail Walk and Rail Slide, techniques that were especially useful to me as I could adapt them to walk along the ropes that Daddy had to climb across before.

Getting out of town was a bit complex. After all, Mom was already there, both after Daddy and to take Muggshot down. After that, we went back to Paris to recuperate and let me sleep in my own bed. I miss that on our longer trips.

In the Jungle

Mz. Ruby was apparently some sort of voodoo priestess, according to the paperwork. I didn't know what that meant, and no one in my family seemed comfortable explaining what it meant at the time. I was able to put together that it involved some sort of magic, and thus might have something to do with my abilities, since I had magic according to Seft. This added another concern, as she might decide to try and capture me for her own uses, and that made me nervous. After all, who can enjoy exploring a Haitian Jungle with the knowledge that a crocodile might spring out of any corner to snatch you up?

I did manage to sneak a peek at her file while we were driving, though. Oddly enough, she was much in the same boat as Muggshot had been, but coming from the opposite direction. Where Muggshot was a victim of bullying until he grew strong enough to be the bully, Ruby was feared for her abilities until she mastered them and embraced the fear. From the sound of it, they were both just...lonely.

If it turns out I'm right, I'm going to ask Mom if she can put them in the same prison. I think they'd be good friends once they stopped trying to be evil.

(Doodled beneath this entry in Coco's journal is a picture of a bulldog with crocodile teeth and tail, scales under the fur, and big red eyes shining under a little bow in its hair, a voodoo doll of Raleigh clutched in its teeth like a chew toy.)

The Cooper van pulled to a halt at the edge of the swamp, leaving Sly and Coco to make their way towards Mz. Ruby's base of operations. "We need to be careful here," Sly spoke up softly. "If Mz. Ruby really will try to snatch you up, you can't risk anything over the pools of water. She - or her goons - might be waiting in every pool and puddle."

"I know, Daddy," Coco responded as she clung tightly to his back. "I'll stick real close."

Nodding, Sly made his way inward, leaping from lily pad to lily pad. As he approached a large root, however, Bentley sent them an urgent message. "Sly, Coco, I don't think we'll have to worry too much about living minions of Mz. Ruby. I'm picking up verifiable paranormal activity, including but not limited to focused concentrations of ectoplasmic energy and non-living bio signatures. Ghosts and zombies to the layman...or mare, as the case may be, Coco."

"Ghosts...and zombies?" Coco asked breathlessly, shivering against Sly's back.

Sly frowned in concern. "Maybe you should-"

"That's so cool!" Coco gasped out quietly, eyes alight with eagerness. "Bentley, do you think you could build ghost tech?"

"Some sort of...ectoplasmic detonation device to interfere with Mz. Ruby's ability to control the dead she's raised?" Bentley clarified carefully. "Well...maybe. Energy is energy after all. With enough samples..."

"Let's put a pin - or needle - in that for now," Sly mused, hopping onto a long root to rail walk across to the next floating platform. "We'll figure out what we need to do specifically. For now, we need to get out of the open."

Sly continued to walk, jump, and slide his way through the swamp with Coco on his back, fighting off gigantic black spiders and purple mosquitoes that patrolled that section of the swamp. "Is this normal?" Coco asked as Sly squashed another with a swat of his cane. "Spiders and mosquitoes this size, I mean? I read that they're bigger in swamps and deep jungles like this, but..."

"Pretty sure these have been enhanced by Mz. Ruby's magic," Sly explained firmly. "This could prove dangerous..."

"We can handle it!" Coco offered confidently. "We can handle anything together, Daddy."

Sly smiled warmly. "That's the spirit, sweetie."

As Sly and Coco looped around the tunnels and vines, it seemed like that would be the limit of what they encountered. At first, it seemed the faces on some of the trees were natural formations that only added to the atmosphere. However, this assumption proved mistaken when a creature that seemed to be made of wood separated itself from the roof of the wooden tunnel they were running through, revealing four legs and a glowing, angry face. As shocking as it was, it proved to be no sturdier than any other dead wood, falling apart after enough strikes.

For some reason, Coco had a vision of such a creature in the shape of a wolf, and found that image much more terrifying. She privately hoped Mz. Ruby hadn't made any of those.

Finally, the pair reached a large gate guarded by a genuine sapient, a skinny rat in a voodoo mask as best Coco could tell. She was grateful to finally be useful again as she put him under with a knock-out needle, allowing Sly to climb the gate with ease. As they made their way further forward, they received another alert from Bentley.

"It seems Mz. Ruby's a bit more clever with her Treasure Keys than Raleigh or Muggshot were," he explained. "The one you need to open the gate into her fortress ahead is protected by a bad mojo force field. Thankfully, those aren't easy to make at range, so the purple candles that provide the magical energy will be close by. From the strength of that field, you'll need to destroy five. But you need to be extra careful. From the looks of things, Mz. Ruby's guards are also voodoo practitioners, and likely won't hesitate to turn their powers against you-"

"We'll take them out from range then," Coco suggested. "I see a way Dad can hop around the tops of the tents, and I can take out both guards and candles from above. That should be safe enough, right?"

"And once we have a clear path, we can swoop in, snatch the Key, and be out of here before anyone's the wiser," Sly confirmed.

"Just as soon as we find the vault," Coco corrected.

Coco's suggested strategy proved effective, and it wasn't long before Sly was snatching up the Treasure Key. While Sly was grabbing the Key, Coco hopped across a narrow gap to the Vault, popping it open easily to get the Thievius Raccoonus page inside. It contained Kelle Cooper's notes on the Getaway Roll technique developed by Sally Cooper. The notes contained a technique to focus a powerful electromagnetic field into the roll, surrounding the roller with the field and zapping anyone rolled into with enough volts to render them out cold.

With page and Key in hand, the pair made their way into Mz. Ruby's fortress.

Ghosts and Goblins

As they entered the fortified center of the swamp, the first thing that caught their attention was a massive structure of twisted living wood in the distance, like several trees that had been forced to grow rapidly together until they became a tower of wood and darkness, looming over all beneath it without a hint of leaf or blossom. They didn't need Bentley's confirmation of paranormal energy in the structure to know it was unnatural.

"Based on the amount of energy I'm picking up, Mz. Ruby herself is inside there," Bentley explained firmly. "But the only way in is through that Skull Temple, and it isn't clear how to make that happen."

"Bet it involves Treasure Keys," Coco murmured softly.

"Already scanning for them," Bentley confirmed as Sly slowly made his way forward.

As Sly made his way towards the first area a Treasure Key was detected in, they heard Mz. Ruby proclaiming part of her plan through what sounded like a megaphone, instructing her followers to toss 'shiny bones' into the soup to create an army of ghosts with which to conquer Mexico. "Talk about a real Day of the Dead party," Sly joked as he entered the new area.

At the end of a short tunnel, the area with the Treasure Key was sealed with an industrial strength iron gate enhanced with voodoo enchantments. An effigy of some sort of creature surmounted the bars. "Think that's to keep us out?" Sly quizzed Coco.

"No," Coco countered firmly. "The magic's directed inward. This is a cage."

"Then we'd best watch out for whatever's locked inside while we explore," Sly confirmed as he leapt upward to the top of the wall before making his way in.

The pair made their way carefully in, smashing through spiders and mosquitoes as they hopped from vine to branch and back again as they sought out the deeper portions of the area. When they were close to the swamp water below, however, the waters shifted near them, seeming to follow their progress. "There's...something in there..." Coco murmured worriedly.

"Probably whatever's locked in here," Sly observed as he picked up his pace, trying to outrun whatever was in the water.

They moved more slowly and with relief as they moved back up into the trees, and became cautious as they approached the waters again. The caution proved viable as a massive serpent burst out of the water behind them, its mouth big enough to swallow them both whole as it exhaled a stinky cloud.

"Any chance you could knock it out?" Sly asked as he raced along a root to get away.

"Even if I could penetrate its scales with a needle, there's no way I could make a dose big enough!" Coco insisted in fear as the giant snake ate the roots and vines behind them. "Just run!"

Thankfully, it didn't pursue them for long, rapidly losing interest and returning to the waters as they reached the Treasure Key and the vault nearby. While Sly grabbed the key, Coco popped open the vault and found a more modern page of the Thievius Raccoonus, covering Bruce O'Coop's Computer Hacking Technique. While not useful for Sly or Coco, Bentley was overjoyed, as it would let him hack the duty rosters at each hideout so as to provide real time locations of all guards patrolling via the Binoc-u-Coms.

With that collected, the pair took a few moments to catch their breath before returning to the center of the swamp to seek another path.

A careful maneuvering within the main area led to yet another path, this one leading into an old cemetery scattered around both swamp and jungle. "I don't like this place," Coco whispered, seeming afraid to raise her voice any higher than that. "It...it feels like I'm surrounded by ill will...and grasping hands..."

Sly frowned thoughtfully. "Sounds like your magical nature is making you more sensitive to the voodoo magic being used here. Since it involves raising the dead, you're probably feeling the presence of the disturbed specters."

"How do I make it stop?" Coco whimpered, her eyes huge. "It's uncomfortable...watch out!" Reaching into her bag, she hurled a toothpick forward.

A ghost panther took shape in front of them, only to disperse as the toothpick passed through it, several similar phantoms dissolving behind it as the needle flew before embedding itself in a gravestone, banishing the dark aura within it.

"Good shot and reaction time," Sly whispered. "What was on that pick?"

"Umm..." Coco fidgeted nervously. "That was from your sandwich. So...salted fish?"

"Well, salt is supposed to keep ghosts away, though I thought that was only rock salt," Sly mused.

"I thought it was sea salt," Murray offered through the Binoc-u-com. "At least, that's what I heard. And I do use sea salt in making our food, since it's healthier since I can use less."

"I thought only blessed salt worked," Bentley countered.

"Maybe it's Coco's magic that makes it work," Sly concluded logically, ending the conversation. He retrieved the toothpick and handed it back to his daughter, the gravestone crumbling. "Hang onto it...and dip a few clean needles in my sandwich for the salt."

Nodding, Coco did so, preparing herself to deal with ghosts manifesting. The strategy proved useful as they made their way into a mausoleum filled with gravestones that generated the ghosts at great speed in an attempt to overwhelm them. As each gravestone was disabled, Coco became more and more relaxed as the oppressive aura of death became less pronounced.

The last such gravestone guarded both vault and Treasure Key. While Sly grabbed the Key, Coco cracked the vault, finding Mz. Ruby's blueprints inside. With those in hand, the pair made their way back to the center of the swamp.

Beasts and Burdens

Once back in the center of the swamp, Sly and Coco looked around for the next Treasure Key. Signals led them to a large stagnant lake with torches scattered around it, with a locked gate at the opposite end, sealed with voodoo and protecting the Treasure Key.

"If this were one of Uncle Bentley's video games, we'd have to light all the torches to open the gate," Coco observed thoughtfully. "Of course, there'd only be four..."

"You're actually on the right track," Bentley responded over the Binoc-u-com. "I've managed to cobble together a swamp skiff with a flamethrower to light the torches. But I wasn't able to get a proper fuel source installed. You'll have to collect it."

"How are we supposed to manage that?" Sly asked curiously.

"There are piranha swimming around the lake," Bentley explained, illuminating one of the fish through the Binocs. "Run them down, and you'll get enough oil for one shot of the flame thrower, and the container can only hold enough for five shots at a time. But once you start, the noise from the skiff will draw larger predators, since this area is actually within that giant snake's enclosure. You'll have at most two minutes before it arrives and starts hunting you down. Given previous behavior, I doubt it likes fire and will likely be much more determined to get you this time."

"Then we'll get it done faster than that," Sly murmured, racing to the skiff.

Even with the pair working together in their planning, they cut things pretty close. Coco's needles did manage to stun the fish for a time, and she also spotted a few places where the torches were close enough together that a pair could be lit with a single shot if the flame thrower was activated as the skiff drifted past at high speed on a half spin, but even before a minute was up they could hear the serpent's approach. Thankfully, they managed to light all the torches, grab the Treasure Key, and get out before the serpent got there.

The pair attempted to find more paths to Treasure Keys in the central swamp area, but found none they could readily access. However, there was a gate sealed with three Treasure Locks. As they possessed four Keys, Sly popped it open...only for the massive snake to immediately swim out with a roar. It swam around the swamp for a bit, smashed through a bone gate, and then swam back into its enclosure, closing the gate Sly had opened behind itself.

"...guess it wanted to stretch out before taking a nap?" Coco suggested nervously.

"Maybe," Sly allowed, tugging at his collar briefly. "Either way, we have a new part of the swamp to explore for keys."

Beyond the bone gate was a massive cauldron, the top just above the surface of the swamp with a massive device slowly stirring it as Mz. Ruby's henchmen tossed bones into it. Bentley spoke up as Sly and Coco examined it through their Binoc-u-coms. "This looks to be the focus of the paranormal energies...and that's some sort of voodoo egg beater. Seems to run on steam."

"Look!" Coco whispered. "Treasure Locks on the beater."

"If we unlock it, it might thrash their production," Sly mused thoughtfully, "and that could build up enough steam pressure to launch us up into the Skull Temple."

"You're going to need to be careful," Bentley warned. "There are guards all over that thing."

"The giant voodoo masks doing the mixing cast shadows," Coco observed. "Could we...hide in them?"

"That should work," Bentley confirmed. "Be careful."

The strategy worked well, and the pair made their way into a deeper part of the swamp in pursuit of the remaining Keys.

The first area they went into seemed like an overflowing swampy catacombs, with flowing green waterfalls carrying bones into a river of sludge. "This probably feeds straight into that soup Mz. Ruby is making," Sly murmured softly as they raced along narrow bone bridges, Sly climbing underneath while Coco used a modified Rail Walk and her lighter frame to cross on top.

"Then let's cut off the flow," Coco murmured as she made sure to evade the spotlights of the voodoo rats patrolling the platforms above them.

The pair carefully made their way deeper across rotted wooden bridges and web platforms, fighting their way past spiders and constructs that threw flaming skulls. Their path led them upward towards the top of the waterfall, past more of the same obstacles.

As they climbed, Mz. Ruby's voice echoed out to them. "Sly Cooper! I know you're there. I've seen you in the stars, and you're all over my tea leaves! But there's something about you...a power not of this world. It's not your power, either, but something riding on your shoulder like a guardian angel! Whatever it is, I intend to find out. I'll be waiting for you...and you will tell me what power this is!"

"Well, she's definitely after you, after all," Sly murmured softly. "But she's not getting you." He expected an affirmative response, but received only silence. "Coco?"

Coco remained silent, but nudged Sly's cheek with one hoof to show she was okay. Inside, she was steeling herself. If Mz. Ruby could sense her power but not read her, logic suggested Ruby's voodoo and Coco's magic used similar energies. If that was the case, Coco might be the only one who could meet the priestess on her own level. She was determined to be ready.

Just past the top of the waterfall, they came across the Vault. Coco quickly popped it open, revealing another page of the family tome. This one covered Matthew de la Coopeur's improvements to Dev Cooperinda's techniques, allowing the altered perception of time at any time, not just while jumping.

A long vine rail led them into a cavern behind the waterfall, where the Treasure Key was hidden. After that, it was only a quick jaunt back out to the main part of the swamp, leaving only two Treasure Keys to be found.

Voodoo Hoodoo

Following around the outside of the cauldron, the next area Sly and Coco came to had a strange vehicle in front of it. Hopping on, Sly guided it into the area as Bentley gave him a rundown. "That vehicle seems to be outfitted with some sort of high energy cannon. Use it to blast your way through to the Treasure Key. I'm not picking up any Vault in this area, though."

"Then we'll just blast our way to the key," Sly stated firmly, steering along the narrow wooden bridge and blasting their way forward.

Before long, they ended up on a moving wooden platform that floated slowly forward through the swamp. As it floated, more panther ghosts attacked them from gravestones until both ghosts and gravestones were blasted apart by the energy cannon. Once off the platform and moving over solid ground, they split the controls between them with Coco controlling the gun orientation and Sly steering. Between that and Coco's salted needles, they were able to make their way through without problems, and acquire the sixth Treasure Key.

The last Treasure Key was hidden in a granary of some sort, and Bentley had found a way to get it. "A panther ghost has the last Treasure Key, and he's willing to trade it for 50 dead chickens. He wants to make a big pot of gumbo, but he's scared of the bomb toting roosters."

"That seems...oddly convoluted," Coco murmured softly.

"Well, we have to play his rules," Bentley explained. "With the Key in his possession, if you hit him with a salt needle, the Key will vanish along with him."

"Well, we'll just have to start a big cookout, then," Sly concluded, leaping into the granary area.

"We'll go faster if we split up," Coco added, leaping off his shoulders.

The team up worked incredibly well, allowing them to whack and gather the chickens twice as fast, and Coco's stun needles left the roosters out cold until their own bombs destroyed them. Once they'd gathered the 50 chickens, the ghost dropped the final Key for them, allowing them to leave the area.

With all seven Keys in their possession, Sly and Coco unlocked the controls on the cauldron mechanism, allowing them to get to the center. Dropping onto the cap, they pressed it down until the pressure built up enough pressure to launch them into the skull temple. As they arrived, Mz. Ruby stared out at them as she swayed back and forth, her mystic energy gathered around her body. "Ah, so that's the power not of this world, Cooper. I have to say, I never expected her to be so small and adorable. Wonder just how much power she has?"

Coco narrowed her eyes as she drew her cane. "Why don't you try me and find out."

"Oh I intend to little chile," Mz. Ruby responded readily. "Let's see what the pair of you are made of."

Sly quickly made his way forward across tooth-shaped platforms, leaping from molar to incisor to molar, making sure to be off the incisor-shaped spires before the roof slammed down and the matching points directly above crushed the pair. Once they were across, Mz. Ruby slammed her tail into the ground, trying to take the pair out with shockwaves, only for Sly to strike said tail with his cane, forcing her to teleport away across a swampy area.

"You can't run away forever!" Sly shouted out angrily.

"Oh, I don't intend to," Mz. Ruby responded. She gestured to a small turtle at the edge of the swamp. "My servant Chumley will carry you across. Course, while that's happening...we're gonna play a little memory game. Let's see if you've got what it takes to handle a little magic. Repeat my movements exactly, and you won't die."

Frowning, Sly hopped onto the turtle's back, letting it carry him slowly forward. As it moved, Mz. Ruby threw off several blasts of magic, each one a different color and in a different position. As they approached however, Coco's eyes narrowed.

She could see the spheres flying towards her, focused to a single point. Something inside her mind clicked as ideas came together. The Water Bounce technique...Spire Jump...Magic... Putting them together, she leapt.

Before Sly and Mz. Ruby's startled eyes, Coco landed on the first sphere of magic before kicking off, sending the blast spiraling into the wall. She then landed on the second blast, kicking off it almost immediately before landing on the third, kicking it into the water as she finished the leap sequence to land at Mz. Ruby's feet, her hooves glowing from the magic technique she had instinctively crafted from the Cooper skills she'd memorized. Mz. Ruby could only stare as Coco whipped out her cane and struck, impacting the croc's belly and triggering her evac teleport to the next platform.

"How...?" Mz. Ruby started to say, only for a ripping sound in the air to cut her off as one of Coco's needles parted Mz. Ruby's hair, thunking into the wall behind her.

"You were part of the group that killed my grandfather, right in front of Dad's eyes," Coco stated bluntly. "You can surrender now, or the next one goes between your eyes."

Mz. Ruby's eyes widened, her hands going to her mouth. "He...he was there? Oh good lord..." To the surprise of both Sly and Coco...Mz. Ruby burst into tears.

"Uh..." Sly began, unsure what to say now.

"I had no hand in his death, Cooper," Mz. Ruby quickly offered. "None of us did. Not Raleigh, not Muggshot, not me, and not the Panda King. That...that beast that gathered us told us we were just going to take him out of the game. But then we busted in and he...he..." Mz. Ruby shuddered. "Cooper, I hope you didn't see what that beast did to your old man...or to his body."

"I didn't see details," Sly responded softly.

"Be glad you did not," Mz. Ruby continued. "And little lady, I...I wish I'd known ya when I was younger. I'd never have turned my magic to crime...if I hadn't been so alone. My folks...they could use magic, but they didn't have the gift, not like I do...but even my gift is nothing compared ta yours. I'm...I'm not alone no more..."

Sly and Coco exchanged glances, unsure what to say now.

"I know the weight on my juju is bad," Mz. Ruby continued. "But seeing you, chile..." Her eyes locked on Coco. "I can see the shining light of you if you reach your full potential. I can see what it'll do to the world..." She shook her head. "If I can give just a little help to get you closer to that...I can face what's coming to me with a smile. My vault's over there...and my spellbook's in it, too. You take it, little lady."

Sly glanced towards Coco, deciding to leave it to her whether or not to trust Mz. Ruby.

Coco stroked her chin. "My Mom, Inspector Carmelita Fox, should be here before long. Once she arrives, surrender to her and confess everything. Don't ask for any deals. Do that...and I know I'll be able to trust any magic instruction I might come to you for once you're out."

"Will do, chile," Mz. Ruby promised.

"Swear an oath," Sly spoke up. "One we can be sure you won't break."

Mz. Ruby smiled. "In my scrying of magic, I came across an oath none would dare break." Lifting one claw, she began to make motions over her chest and face. "Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye."

Sly frowned. "I don't-"

"Alright," Coco responded immediately. At Sly's confused glance, she shrugged. "I don't know why...but we can trust that oath."

Mz. Ruby smiled. "I'll just head for the entrance to make things easier for your Mama, shall I?" With that, she dove into the swamp and began to swim towards the edge.

Mz. Ruby kept her word. She swam straight to the edge of the swamp and turned herself in when Mom arrived. Her vault not only contained her spellbook, but the pages of the Thievius Raccoonus that covered Slytunkahmen Cooper's invisibility technique, which could allow us to fade from sight completely just by standing still.

It would be a while before I could master everything in the spellbook, so I put it away for after we recovered the Thievius Raccoonus. I'd have plenty of time to peruse it later. In the meantime, we were off to the Kumlun Mountains in western China, to confront the Panda King.

Frozen Peaks

The information we had on Panda King was...limited. All we knew for sure was that he specialized in fireworks, and seemed to think talent should be valued above origin. While I could certainly agree with those points, laying siege to those who'd snubbed you seemed an over the top way to deal with it...

Still, we were going to be amongst snow covered mountain peaks, and if not for the technique I'd learned to manipulate my body temperature, Dad would likely have bundled me up to the point I couldn't move, if he even let me leave the van. Even so, he still insisted I switch to my fleece-lined thief vest, just in case.

As the van pulled to a halt at the end of a paved road up into the mountaintops, Sly leapt out, Coco once more clinging to his back. As they made their way up the slope, they saw that 'Panda King' wasn't an empty title, as the first minion they encountered was a panda wielding kung fu against them, though it went down from a single tranq needle. They continued up the slope, evading bomb filled snow boulders that some of the guarding minions rolled towards them, until they caught sight of a giant statue on a mountaintop. A firework was launched from the top of it into a nearby mountaintop, causing an avalanche to fall on a village below, burying it in freezing snow.

"Coco, don't look-" Sly started to say.

"I already saw, Daddy," Coco replied softly.

Sly winced, unsure how he could explain this to her.

"I saw a bunch of empty buildings get buried in snow," Coco stated bluntly. "I also saw the tracks of heavily loaded carriages that left the place not long ago. Burying a village in snow is pretty bad, but whatever the reason, everyone was out with all their things before it happened."

Sly said nothing. He supposed it was just Coco's nature at this point to try and see the best in those they were facing after what Mz. Ruby had said. Still, he wasn't so certain he could do the same.

The pair continued to make their way up the mountain path towards the statue, trying to sneak around. However, there were times where they had to set off fireworks in order to blast open new paths. "Somehow, I doubt if we'll be able to catch Panda King off guard," Sly grumbled as that happened.

"Since when have we caught anyone off guard save with my presence?" Coco asked pointedly.

"...fair enough."

Careful maneuvering was required to make the way around a building at the edge of the cliff at one point in the path, as Coco still had difficulty managing a narrow embrasure on two legs with her back to a wall. Thankfully, they found a solution by hooking their canes together and letting Coco hang from hers while Sly held his upside down as he sidled along. This then allowed them to clear out the building and open a new path.

Inside the building was the vault, which Coco quickly popped open. It contained the page from the Thievius Raccoonus covering Huckleberry Cooper's further development of Slytunkhamen's invisibility technique, allowing the invisibility to be maintained while moving once it was activated, as long as movement was slow and careful. The pair memorized the technique before pocketing the page, then following the opened paths to reach the security gate.

For the first time, the first Treasure Key was not parked right in front of the gate it opened. Instead, it lay at the end of a heavily guarded maze of paths around several pine trees. Sly frowned as he plotted the paths of the guards to find a safe path through, but Coco tapped his shoulder. "Throw me," she instructed, pointing towards the nearest pine tree.

Getting the idea, Sly grinned, lifted Coco into his hands, and threw her above the nearest tree. Coco's Spire Jump allowed her to brace herself at the top of the tree, and her light weight meant the tree barely swayed in response, allowing her to silently leap from treetop to treetop to the Treasure Key. Once she'd collected it, she reversed the movement to make her way back to Sly. "Good job," Sly praised her as he took the Key, letting her climb back onto his back.

The security gate opened the path to the main stronghold, a massive fortress built atop a mountain peak and stretching out around it on all sides, precariously balanced to maintain equilibrium. The pair were forced to hide frequently as they made their way forward, scouting out the initial terrain. Once in, Bentley gave a run down of what he'd discovered.

"I think I've found a way to the top of that giant statue...but it's obstructed by that reinforced ceiling hatch," Bentley explained, remotely manipulating the direction of the Binoc-U-Coms to highlight the features he was talking about.

"Which we can destroy with those fireworks held in place with three Treasure Locks?" Coco asked, shifting to highlight them.

"That will probably work," Bentley observed.

"I don't think it will be that simple," Sly murmured softly. "We've needed seven Keys every other time. I doubt the pattern's going to be broken at this point."

"Then there's probably going to be something else we'll need once the ceiling hatch has been destroyed," Bentley concluded. "For now, you should find any Treasure Keys you can."

"Just like we always do," Coco confirmed as they broke connection.

With that decided, the pair searched their surroundings, determining which way was the best to go first. They had to be careful, but swift. If they drew too much attention to their actions or took too long, there was every possibility the Panda King would turn his fireworks upon them, and bury them alive in snow.

Fire on the Mountaintop

The search for Treasure Keys began at a temple structure to one side of Panda King's main compound. As Sly and Coco approached, however, they saw that it was patrolled by creatures of various sort garbed in martial arts gi and bearing weapons, making it plainly more a dojo than a temple. Even so, it proved relatively easy for the pair to infiltrate, as the entire path through was basically an obstacle course designed to be just barely possible to maneuver, much like what both Sly and Coco had trained on to build their skills. In point of fact, while the course would prove challenging for any ordinary individual trying to get through, it almost seemed designed specifically to test Cooper family skills.

As such, they were able to breeze through most of the Temple, the only real obstacle being a moving laser grid on a large floor inside a building where the Vault was. Once the laser grid was disabled, Coco opened the safe, revealing another page out of the Thievius Raccoonus. This one covered a technique developed by Sir Augustine of Cooper, along the same lines as the technique that allowed one to kick off water. Much like Coco had developed one that allowed her to use magic charges as points to leap off of, this allowed the user to kick off empty air...although doing so was quite draining, and was recommended only to be used as a way to evade a death-defying fall caused by a misstep, and only if a safe landing point was within range.

Just outside that building was the Treasure Key, which the pair collected eagerly before returning to the central area.

The next area the pair explored also contained a temple-like structure, though lacking the obstacle course-like hazards of the previous one. Instead, there were a great many guards with lights watching the paths. Rather than draw attention by knocking the guards out, Sly and Coco made use of their Invisibility technique. By focusing their inner energy and inverting it, light and sound passed around them as though they weren't there. The technique had three major drawbacks. First, it took a great deal of concentration to maintain, forcing them to move slowly, and they couldn't jump while it was active. Second, striking out at a living being would immediately dispel the technique as the violent contact with another energy source would disrupt the inverted energy flows. Finally, anyone who saw the energy inversion being activated - such as a guard who was already pursuing them when they turned invisible - would be able to see an afterimage of the pair as they moved, until they escaped sight. Still, it proved useful as they moved past waves of guards.

This made the journey for this Vault and Treasure Key easy but time consuming. The Vault contained the blueprints to the Panda King's lair, and was positioned at the top of the structure they had to leap into - past numerous security laser grids - to reach the Treasure Key.

The fourth Key proved to be in yet another area where Murray had to race uphill to collect, as there was no way to reach it from within the compound. Once again, Coco used a turret mounted firework launcher to cover his run, ensuring he didn't take harm as he sought out the Key. After that, Sly and Coco collected the Key from Murray, and used three of them to activate the fireworks in the main compound.

The shattered roof panel allowed the pair to drop to a lower level of the structure, where another group of fireworks in another open air segment was locked with seven locks. "Let me guess," Coco murmured softly. "Those will take us straight to the top of the statue, where the Panda King is waiting."

"That's right," Bentley observed through the Binoc-u-com. "It's...actually marked that way on the blueprints. Which I have to admit, is really strange. In fact, the entire blueprint is, as it gives the general areas of each of the Keys as well, almost as though it was written to give you just enough information to figure the rest out for yourselves."

"Hmm," Sly mused thoughtfully. "Almost sounds like he wants us to meet him in battle." He smirked softly. "I'd hate to disappoint."

"Then let's go get the next Key," Coco murmured, glancing off to the next area.

The next path to a Treasure Key took them across the rooftops of another area of buildings. As soon as Coco caught sight of this, she hopped off Sly's back. "What's up, Coco?" Sly asked curiously.

"Pretty sure Mom's gonna show up," Coco observed calmly. "Figured I'd let you two flirt while I went and fetched the contents of the Vault and the Treasure Key, like I did back in Mesa City."

"Somehow I doubt that'll happen," Sly countered playfully.

"Betcha fifty bucks!" Coco challenged eagerly.

Sly smirked. "You're on-"

"F-freeze, raccoon!" Carmelita called out from a nearby rooftop, aiming her stun cannon towards him.

Coco giggled softly as she raced ahead along the rooftops. "I'll collect later!" she called back.

"W-where's she going?" Carmelita demanded, shivering slightly.

"Off to play in the snow and set off some of the fireworks, I imagine," Sly observed. "But speaking of freezing, you're the one who looks to be catching cold." He took a step forward.

"D-don't move!" Carmelita stammered as her teeth began to chatter.

Sly smiled. "Look, I'm not doing anything criminal at the moment. As long as I don't disobey your directives here, you've got nothing to put me in cuffs over. So how about instead we step into one of these empty huts, I start a fire to warm you up, and you can question me as a 'person of interest'. How's that sound?"

Carmelita tried to clench her teeth, but they were chattering too much. "F-f-fine!" she finally grumbled petulantly. "But don't you try anything. I'll be watching you!"

Sly grinned slyly, quirking his eyebrow suggestively. "Then I'll be sure to give you plenty to watch."

Coco giggled to herself as the sounds of their voices faded as she raced across the rooftops. As she ran, she set off a few fireworks...to clear paths, and to give her parents a show and a talking point. She was certain her Dad would explain to her Mom about how the entire facility was a cover for an illegal weapons manufacture plant, with the explosives disguised as fireworks. The Vault she eventually discovered contained a page of the Thievius Raccoonus, covering Colonel Reid Cooper's Time Stop Technique...which didn't actually stop time. Instead, it released a surge of psychic energy that stunned everyone within a specific range, as determined by the strength of the mind of the one using the technique, and only worked on those with minds significantly weaker than the user. This made the technique rather situational and somewhat limited in usefulness. Still, it meant there was very little of the book left to recover.

Once Coco recovered the Treasure Key, she made her way back to where she saw her parents duck in out of the cold. It was her intention to just leave with her Dad back to the central area to seek the last two Treasure Keys...but when she got there, things changed.

Glancing in the window of the structure, she saw her Dad's cane and her Mom's shock pistol on a table, a fire in the fireplace, and a pile of clothes next to something very lumpy under a blanket. She wasn't certain what she was looking at, but she was pretty certain she didn't want to interrupt.

Turning, she headed back for the main area. "Uncle Bentley, when Daddy checks in, let him know I went after the two remaining Keys...but not before, alright?"

"Are you sure you're up to handling it alone?" Bentley offered worriedly.

"I'm sure," she observed. "Besides, I'm pretty sure Daddy's busy helping Mommy warm up."

"What are-oh!" Bentley's voice suddenly became very embarrassed. "Right, we'll just leave him to it, then..."

Final Gather

While Murray wound up in yet another race for a Treasure Key, Coco followed the path to the last one, which Bentley's directions showed was at the end of another path she could follow via a mobile gun turret. Hopping on, she blasted the doors apart and rode into the path. She then proceeded to blast her way past several conveyor belts and martial arts monkeys that blocked the path, and across snowy fields and gorillas launching exploding snowballs. It didn't take long for her to retrieve the Treasure Key and return. By then, Murray had won the race, and Coco detoured back to the van to retrieve it before moving to wait for Sly by the fireworks.

Sly never knew he could feel so happy and awkward at the same time. The entire encounter had started so innocently. He'd convinced Carmelita to come into one of the huts to warm up...which turned out to be a combination sentry post/storage shed. There were blankets, some crates, and a fireplace. He'd quickly lit the fire and arranged the blankets to help her warm up, but she continued to shiver. Without even thinking about it, he'd wrapped her in his arms, using his own internally regulated body temperature to try and warm her up, but she was still chilled...mostly because her clothes were wet from melted snow.

Then she'd started undressing.

He'd tried to be a gentleman, keeping his back turned as she laid her clothes out in front of the fireplace to dry. But then she'd told him flat out to shed his clothes and spoon up behind her before she froze. With a direct order like that, he hadn't hesitated...and did his best to remain suave while being very careful where his hands - or other things - wound up. For the sake of his dignity, he found himself very grateful for how thick and fluffy a fox tail was.

To get both their minds off what was happening, Sly had started talking about the members of the Fiendish Five they'd dealt with, and what they'd learned so far about Panda King's operation. As they talked, Carmelita wound up getting excited about the prospect of the huge bust she'd be able to make by taking down the entire gang, turned...

Sly wasn't sure about the exact order of events after that, but he found himself very glad Coco hadn't walked in on them. That would have been even more awkward than it was already. He still faced resolutely away from Carmelita, clutching his cane as she pulled her now dry clothes back on.

"You've done this sort of thing before?" she asked carefully.

"No," Sly offered quickly. "That was...the first time..."

She hesitated for a few moments. "...really," she replied finally, her voice having a hint of surprise mixed with amazement. She pulled on her jacket. "Sly...if..."

When she didn't say more, Sly turned towards her and saw her hand on her abdomen. He quickly realized her concern, and smiled as he realized he could reassure her. "You don't need to worry about that," he said softly. "My Dad managed to teach me one family technique before..." He glanced away, not wanting to mar this moment with talk of what had happened. "Anyway, it was one developed by one of my mystic ancestors, a focusing of internal energy that prevents anything 'left behind' from having any mystical trace of the one who 'shed' it."

Carmelita raised an eyebrow. "And this has relevance how?" she asked coldly.

"Well, in more recent eras of science, this was discovered to mean that, with this technique active, we don't leave behind fingerprints...or DNA." He grinned cheekily. "It didn't take long for one of my male ancestors to discover a...recreational use for this technique." Reaching over, he put his hand over hers on her belly. "Which means this won't happen unless and until we both decide we're ready."

Carmelita's eyebrow raised further, plainly trying to maintain a composed expression. However, the rapid coloring of her cheeks plainly showed that she wasn't succeeding. "A useful thing to know." Her expression then grew thoughtful.

Reaching his other hand up, Sly pulled a penny from her ear. "Penny for your thoughts?"

"Just that if you continue to evade capture as effectively as you have, the first time I put you in cuffs might not be to take you to jail," Carmelita replied, her smirk turning a trifle wicked. A similar chuckle followed as Sly's cheeks colored. "For now, I need to gather the squads. I'll catch you later raccoon...one way or the other." With that she sauntered out of the hut, her hips swaying enticingly as her tail swished, showing off how tightly her pants hugged her figure.

Sly promptly fell flat on his back. "...what a woman..." he murmured, desperately struggling to get himself under control. "I'm not so sure I can handle her..." A massive grin plastered itself on his face. "But it's going to be fun trying."

"Are you about finished 'warming up' the Inspector, Sly?" Bentley's voice demanded a bit snippily from the Binoc-U-Com.

Gulping, Sly picked up the communicator. "Uh...how much did you hear?" he asked nervously.

"I didn't," Bentley responded flatly. "Once Coco said I should give you time with Miss Fox and I realized what was happening, I set your Binoc-U-com to buzz me when you were alone."

Sly groaned, putting his face in his hand. "So I'm going to have to explain what that was to Coco later. That's not going to be awkward at all..." His head shot up. "Wait, where is she? She didn't go after Panda King on her own, did she?"

"Relax," Bentley reassured him. "You still have four of the Treasure Keys. Coco's got the other three now, though, and she's waiting for you by the fireworks."

"On my way," Sly muttered as he grabbed his clothes.

Honor and Villainy

It wasn't long before Sly caught up to Coco at the second set of fireworks. He focused on the fireworks, as the grin Coco directed his way was far too knowing for a six year old. He prayed she hadn't seen too much when he was...helping Carmelita warm up. Still, she didn't have anything to say as they combined their Treasure Keys and unlocked the fireworks. Using their canes, they hooked themselves to the fireworks as they launched, carrying them straight to the top of the statue.

(1)

The Panda King looked up from his meditation when he felt, more than heard, the Coopers come in. Seeing Sly standing there with confidence and readiness to do what he needed to do, The Panda King smiled inside. At the same time, he found himself lost in sorrow. He was the same age as Jing, after all. This would never be easy...but it was the fate he had to live with. He also noticed the little pony that he had adopted. She must have been the same age as Sly was when... He shook his head. There was a time and place for regrets. "Greetings, Sly Cooper, Coco Cooper." He stood and stretched slightly.

"Panda King," Sly responded, making no move beyond that.

"You are here for the pages, and revenge, I presume," The King grunted. He glanced to the side, where a vault rested in a far wall. "They are there."

Sly glanced at the vault, and blinked at the fact that it wasn't even shut, open and revealing the pages in their glory. He looked back at the Panda King in confusion. "Oddly convenient," he offered carefully, suspecting a trap.

Coco watched the Panda King curiously. After having seen nearly every other member of this 'cutthroat crew' turn out to be a lot softer than expected - and Mz. Ruby's assertion that only the leader had been a true monster - she was no longer certain what to think of The Panda King.

Noticing the suspicion and curiosity on his guests' faces, The Panda King took a neutral stance. "They are yours to take when you leave, no matter how our encounter goes. I have not read them." He smirked as he noticed Sly's confusion grow even further. "You have questions." He settled into the first stance of Flame Fu, flames gathering around all four paws. He saw Sly tense in surprise, and Coco's eyes widen, her mouth widen in eagerness. "I have answers, if you can prove you can handle them. Fight me, Coopers! Show me how you have grown! Show me your strength, your heart! The child hiding in the closet, he cannot face him. Show me that child has become a man! Then I will answer your questions!" Without further stalling, he tossed a flame up off his hand before spinning to kick it towards the pair.

Coco and Sly immediately split, each of them running in a different direction. The Panda King focused his attention on Sly, discounting Coco as a threat. After all, she was too small to actually do physical harm to him, and he'd built up a tranquilizer immunity from the many, many times he'd tried to sell his fireworks to the spoiled rich only to be shot with a tranq and tossed out with the trash for being 'a penniless nobody daring to think he was worth a noble's time'. Besides, Sly was the one he wanted to test.

Both of them proved faster than he'd anticipated, however, as Sly was able to easily outrun the flung flames as he circled, quickly moving to the center platform of the pagoda. The Panda King shifted his combat stance to close range. "Fiery Wheel!" he cried out, charging flame into one paw before flipping on his head, spinning like a wheel in an attempt to knock Sly off his feet. Sly, however, leapt over the strike, using his cane to propel himself off Panda King's own leg as he shot for the ceiling, only to come down on The Panda King's head before leaping off.

"Booming Chop!" The Panda King cried out angrily, spinning to try and chop Sly down, only for Sly to dodge...and Coco to catch the blazing strike with her forelegs.

The Panda King's eyes went wide and he cringed inwardly, expecting to see Coco Cooper crumple and cry out in agony, whether from the impact or the agony. His eyes widened further as neither happened. Coco clutched the paw in both forelegs, pushing back as her eyes glowed. She then smiled softly. "...that's how it works..." she whispered.

Spinning, she planted her fore hooves, lifted her hindquarters, pulled her hind legs close to her barrel...and kicked out with the sound of a cannon firing as twin bursts of flame shot from her hind hooves, straight into The Panda King's belly.

The Panda King flew back, clutching his belly as the mother of all heartburn ran through him, making him cough as he slammed into one of the pagoda's support pillars. As he landed, he was somewhat relieved to see Sly Cooper showing as much shock at this twist as he was. He looked Coco in the eye as he got to his feet. "To understand Flame Fu...just from encountering it..."

"Energy is energy," Coco replied softly. "If I can stand on water, midair, and magic...why not fire?"

The Panda King chuckled, the soft sound slowly growing louder. "Then let us see what you both are really capable of!" Channeling flame into all four paws at once, he launched himself forward, intent on unleashing a shockwave of flame on impact, and possibly crushing one of them beneath him as he landed.

Sly dashed forward to meet the charge...and Coco leapt off his head, catching The Panda King around the neck with the hook of her cane. As the momentum jerked his upper body back, Sly caught one of his ankles in the hook of his cane, making him flip onto his back before the pair kicked off the ground to deliver a twin kick into his belly.

As they both moved back, The Panda King got to his feet...only to see Sly spinning his cane with the hook up, Coco's cane hooked onto his as she clung to it, spinning faster and faster before releasing. As she spun towards him curled in a ball, her entire body burst into flame as she struck him once more in the belly, sending him slamming back into the floor and onto his side.

He coughed, gasping and choking through the burn and the blows he'd taken. "Alright, I yield," he gasped out finally. "Plainly, the two of you have grown strong together...strong enough to face him."

"Who is...he?" Sly asked carefully. "Mz. Ruby wouldn't say anything about him either."

"Nor will I so long as Coco is within earshot," The Panda King stated firmly. "If you want to know, have her take the pages back to your compatriots, Murray and Bentley. I will tell you nothing until she is on her way."

"...you seem to know a lot about us," Sly observed calmly.

"There is reason for that," The Panda King replied.

Since he wasn't going to bend on that, I grabbed the pages from the Vault. Since these contained the blueprints crafted by Otto Von Cooper - who specialized in vehicle modifications - they would only really be useful to Bentley, so I took them back to him. Sly stayed with The Panda King for quite some time...

(1) Scene heavily inspired by this comment by SvenBjorn.

Monsters and Men

Once Coco was out of hearing range, Sly looked Panda King right in the eye. "You said you'd give me answers?" he asked calmly. "Here's my first one. What did you think would happen when you went after my father that night?"

The Panda King shrugged. "Clockwerk told us the plan was to break both legs and his dominant arm as a message to stay out of our business. It seemed logical at the time. The five of us would be able to overpower him, a Master Thief would never go to the police, and no matter how well the limbs healed he would be out of action for years, if not forever. The Cooper Techniques only work if you have full command of your body, after all. Badly healed old injuries - or fresh ones - would make most of them quite difficult...or so Clockwerk told us."

"Clockwerk?" Sly asked intently.

"The one who gathered us to do it," The Panda King explained. "It was only when we arrived that we discovered his true plan. When he went for Conner with beak and talons rather than other weapons...we knew we had been used." He lifted his head. "And then I made the only choice I could accept...when I saw Conner shove the son we didn't know he had into a closet, a son the same age as my own daughter, Jing. I moved to the closet...and closed it all the way, standing in front of it as I watched what Clockwerk did..."

Sly blinked in shock. He remembered being pushed into the closet, staring out at the shadowy figures that had attacked his father until the door slammed shut on him. He had long thought the shifting of furniture had saved and protected him...

"He did not come to wound, or even to kill," The Panda King continued, his voice sounding ill. "He came to raven..."

Sly's eyes went wide as his face took on a greenish cast. "You mean..."

"Clockwerk is an ancient owl, who has replaced nearly his entire body with metal, keeping himself alive on pure hate," The Panda King continued. "Hate...for the Cooper Clan. Your father was not his enemy...but his prey. And that is how he will see you when he learns of your existence."

"He'll find this prey isn't so helpless," Sly growled, clutching his father's cane tightly.

"Which is why I fought you," The Panda King pointed out. "To be sure that, now that you've entered this world, you will be strong enough to face him." He put one hand over his face wearily. "When I took you to that orphanage, I had hoped I could protect you from this world, as I protected Jing by keeping her out of it."

"You took me to the orphanage?" Sly gasped in shock. He could just barely remember the shadowy figure that had picked him up and packed his things when he'd been found crying in the closet, carried to the orphanage in silence.

"Yes," The Panda King continued. "Chosen carefully. Prosperous enough you'd get three squares each day, but isolated enough that it never entered any news...and close enough to your father's destroyed home that it would be the last place Clockwerk would look for you if he suspected a Cooper Heir had been hidden from him. When I reached there, I saw two other children being dropped off there in your age group...a turtle and a hippo. I placed you with them in the hopes you would also find friends, and in that way seek normality, and then faded into the shadows." He chuckled softly. "Imagine my surprise when years later I learned that not only had you instead brought them into this world...but that you were able to meet Seft in battle without the skills of your legacy. Truly, you have grown strong."

"I owe that to my friends and family," Sly stated firmly, thinking on Coco, Bentley, Murray, memories of his father, and...

"And the Inspector?" The Panda King asked teasingly. "That hut is in direct line from my telescope. Quite an...energetic warm up." He gave a paternally evil chuckle as Sly's cheeks turned red. "Oh, to be young and in love again. I remember what it was like when I first met Jing's mother...oh what a whirlwind..."

"So that's everything then?" Sly asked quickly, trying to get past the embarrassing situation.

"Yes, that is everything," The Panda King concluded. "You will find Clockwerk in the Krack-Karov Volcano in Russia. Now that I know how strong you have become, I can give you this knowledge freely. Good luck. You will need it to purge this monster from the world."

"You've seen my daughter," Sly responded readily. "You've seen my Gang. And you've seen Coco's mother." He smirked cheekily. "A good deal of her, at that, from what you've said. I think good luck is something I have in great supply."

"Pray it hasn't run out," The Panda King concluded as Sly left, sitting back to wait for the Inspector to come arrest him.

Dad never told me what happened during that conversation with The Panda King - or TPK, as I came to think of him - but he seemed more pleasantly disposed towards him after that. He also knew exactly where to go next, but he felt a trip home to plan and collect our thoughts and recover our energy would be a good idea first.

It was just after we got home that I asked Dad about what he and Mommy were doing in that little hut on the snowy mountain that they had to take their clothes off. That led to a different side trip...

(1)

Carmelita groaned as she dropped her jacket over her chair and flopped into it. Processing The Panda King had been exhausting, physically and mentally. Not only had there been more legal loopholes to jump through than she'd thought even to get him locked up - in the same wing Muggshot and Mz. Ruby were locked up in, since Coco had recommended all three of them as redeemable - just dealing with those involved had been frustrating. On top of that, The Panda King had kept shooting her knowing, paternal smirks. When she'd finally demanded to know what he found so funny as he was leaving her custody, all he'd said was, "Telescopes on mountaintops spy many windows."

She was very, very glad her shift had ended immediately after. She was going to kill Sly for not closing those curtains...

A knock at her door drew her attention. Groaning, she got to her feet and went. Opening the door, she was surprised as Sly shoved Coco into her arms.

"You need to give her the birds and the bees talk!" he said quickly before leaping off the building and swinging away.

Coco looked up at Caremlita with a warm, loving, confused smile. "What does he mean by that, Mommy? I didn't see any birds or bees in the hut back on the mountain..."

Carmelita felt her cheeks color yet again. God damn you, ringtail... she growled silently.

(1) This scene inspired by Kenshinryuu

Night On Bald Mountain

Almost as soon as Sly, Carmelita, and Coco exited the structure to a ledge over a pit of magma, one of Clockwerk's owl drones swooped down, seizing his and Coco's canes and flying off. Carmelita quickly shot them both down, but the canes fell off in the distance.

"No!" Sly called out angrily. "That cane's been in my family for generations! And Coco needs hers-"

"Then go get them," Carmelita instructed them both. "I'll cover you from here!"

Coco chuckled softly. "Like Uncle Murray's runs, but faster," she murmured softly. "Course, then I'm the one doing the shooting."

Carmelita smiled, then turned to Sly. "You know, with everything that happened, I will have to make an attempt to arrest you once Clockwerk is dealt with. Otherwise, there will be questions back at HQ."

"I kind of expected that," Sly allowed. "I won't hold it against you."

Carmelita smirked. "I will, however, give you a ten second head start."

Sly chuckled. "All I need," he offered teasingly before scooping Coco up and leaping to the nearest spire to make his way forward.

"Keep an eye out for my jetpack!" Carmelita called out as she offered covering fire, shooting the Fire Slugs that got too close to the pair, making sure they stayed safe. After all, this was her family, and she would protect it.

That thought left her with a conundrum as she let it settle in her mind. Family...this was complicated now.

As she saw Sly and Coco reach the top of the death ray and reclaim their canes, she made a mental note to get them all some therapy. There was a lot for them to work through.

Sly and Coco saw the jetpack at the top of the owl-shaped death ray structure, right where they'd thought it would be. As they looked, Bentley contacted them both. "Hurry!" he called out. "The magnetronic support field for the death ray broke while you were racing for your canes from the obstacles Carmelita had to shoot out for you! The entire structure is going to sink into the magma before too long!"

"Got it!" Sly shouted out, leaping for the nearest rail as Coco clutched his back. He slid down rapidly, leaping to the next one before climbing back up when down ceased to be a viable option. He continued to leap through broken chunks of machinery as the structure fell apart, desperately making his way towards the top. He paused only while climbing when electrical fields blocked his path, and he still got as close to them as he dared so he could rush past when the field dropped. It was a relief to both of them when they reached the jetpack.

To Sly's surprise, the jetpack had a spot for Coco to sit and control the guns, though the main controls at Sly's hands could override if no input from Coco's controls was incoming. Once Coco was strapped in, Sly took to the air, trusting to their bond and cooperative efforts to maneuver around and shoot at whatever arose...and arise it did.

Clockwerk proved to be a massive owl, his entire body seeming to have been replaced with sturdy metal parts as he lifted into the air, flapping as he rode the thermals of the magma pit. "Sly Cooper," he growled out, his voice echoing through his metal frame as his golden eyes glowed with hate. "You escaped my gas chamber and destroyed my death ray. Remarkable. You Coopers always find a way to beat me."

"So that was you in the background of those photos," Sly concluded as he shot for height. "How old are you, anyway?"

"Perfection has no age," Clockwerk responded immediately. "My hatred for your clan has allowed me to transcend the ravages of time. So long as my hate fuels me, I am forever beyond death's grasp." His eyes flashed red and gold. "Revenge is the primary ingredient in the fountain of youth. I have kept myself alive for centuries with jealousy and hate, until the day I would finally eclipse your family's thieving reputation."

"And then what?" Coco asked curiously.

"Then upon this world I shall raven as I choose until I die," Clockwerk growled out. "The legacy I leave behind shall never be forgotten, my mark upon the land forever scarred."

"Sly!" Carmelita called into the communicators. "His armor's too strong for damage from the jetpack's weaponry, and my own weapon fire can't damage his insides...but can put holes in his armor!"

"Got it!" Coco responded immediately. "I'll aim for the holes."

Sly kept control of the jetpack, flying around to evade the purple blasts of hate-fueled energy that Clockwerk fired off. Every so often, one of Carmelita's stun rockets would impact part of Clockwerk's body, and Coco would immediately fire on that part as much as she could before the charge faded or the plate shattered. After shattering the plates on his face, his talons, his tail, and one wing, he was no longer able to maintain flight and crashed into the magma.

"Did we get him?" Coco asked worriedly.

Sly frowned as Clockwerk flapped out of the magma. "Not yet," he mumbled. He then called out to Clockwerk. "If you've been following my family for so long, how did you miss me when you killed my father?"

"You mean when The Panda King blocked the closet?" Clockwerk chuckled wickedly. "I knew you were there. I left you alive intentionally, to show the world that without your precious book, your line was nothing."

"Seft thought that, too," Sly growled angrily. "He's probably still got the scar in his chest to prove his mistake. It's not the book that makes the Cooper, but the Cooper that makes the book."

"Enough!" Clockwerk snarled out as he struggled for height. "It ends here! I will finish you like I finished your father, and your line will end!"

"Not on my watch," Coco growled silently, putting her hooves to the guns and focusing her magic...and her skills in Flame Fu.

"And then the only Master Thief will be-"

Clockwerk's rant was interrupted as Coco let out a cry of, "Meteor Shot!" Massive blasts of flame focused to the point of being solid spheres shot at high speeds from the rockets of the jetpack, shorting out the launchers as they flew. They slammed into Clockwerk's wings, punching huge holes in each and sending him crashing to the lava anew.

"Sly!" Bentley shouted out. "I've located the focus of Clockwerk's auto repair! You need to get to his head and smash it before he gets back in the air!"

Sly rushed across the obstacles Clockwerk scattered to prevent him from getting close, landing on Clockwerk's back. Sly and Coco wailed away with their canes, ripping apart his structure even as he gave his last words.

"You will never be rid of me, Coopers! Never!" With that, his head collapsed, and the body stopped moving.

Family

As Clockwerk collapsed, Sly was able to snag the last bit of the Thievius Raccoonus from him, finally having collected the entire tome and restoring the family legacy. He and Coco settled on the edge of a metal bridge jutting out over the caldera of the volcano, watching as the pieces of his body fell into the magma. It wasn't long before Bentley, Murray, and Carmelita caught up to them there.

"That's him dealt with," Carmelita observed calmly as Coco hopped off Sly's shoulder, heading to join Bentley and Murray in the van.

"Indeed it is," Sly agreed. "And...my father avenged. And his legacy recovered." He lifted the completed tome with a soft smile, caressing the leather cover, his fingertips running over the gold engravings.

Carmelita sighed softly, then lifted her stun cannon. "And now I have to pursue you again," she stated firmly, handcuffs held in her free hand. "If I let you go without trying to catch you..."

"I know, I know," Sly agreed. "Besides, being chased my whole life by a lady as pretty as you? I'm hardly one to complain."

Carmelita chuckled softly. "Really not an appropriate time for flirting," she chided gently.

Sly found himself smirking. He'd noticed Carmelita tended to shift her mindset completely for whatever she was doing. She was either all business, all motherly, or...well, that was a pleasant memory for another time. "How about that ten second head start you promised?"

Carmelita smirked. "Starts now. 10..."

As the countdown went down, Sly slowly sauntered up to Carmelita, a flirtatious grin on his face. Carmelita grew more confused as he approached, her count becoming less firm and more concerned, her stun cannon lifted slightly. And then at "one", Sly lunged in, locking lips with Carmelita for a deep, passionate kiss. Her entire body relaxed as she stared in stupefaction as he pulled away. He'd never taken the lead in showing affection before. "S-Sly..." she stammered out.

Sly grinned widely. "Zero," he whispered as he leapt over her, bouncing from a nearby rock pinnacle straight into the van before it drove off.

Carmelita blinked in surprise, then turned to go, only to find her gun hand pulled up short. Turning, she saw she was now cuffed to the bridge. She knew, even with the keys in her pocket, Sly and the others would be long gone by the time she could get on the trail. "I'll get you for that, Ringtail..." she growled irritably under her breath. To her relief, the key actually was still in her pocket...

While I was glad we'd successfully restored the family tome - not the least of which because it meant I finally got to have dessert again - I didn't really like Dad doing that to Mom on the way out. Mom didn't like it much either. As such, when she did catch up with us unofficially, she told Dad in no uncertain terms that he was to find a qualified therapist for us all to see for 'family counseling'. This was not to say we were a broken or damaged family, just that we had our problems, and Mom wanted them dealt with before we became broken or damaged because of them.

As it turned out, Dad happened to know of one, a therapist who made his services available specifically to the criminal element and those connected to it, so their mental issues couldn't be used against them. The only requirement to see him was to respect his rules...and share no specifics.

(1)

The short, stocky, white weasel straightened his glasses on his nose as he stared at those gathered in his office...well, his office for this particular line of work, anyway. He had others, but that was neither here nor there. "Hello everyone," he stated softly. "I can't say I'm entirely pleased that this session includes a suit, however good she looks in it." He stared at Carmelita flatly.

"That's my Mommy!" Coco piped up happily. "I'm Coco! What's your name?"

"I have many," the weasel responded bluntly. "But for this, you can call me Mozzie(2). Now, I've done family counseling before, and I've found in these situations, the truest answers come from the children. So, Coco, tell me about your father."

"He steals things!" Coco explained happily.

Recognizing this was a little too close to the line of specifics, Sly spoke up to make it more vague. "What she means is that I'm a...recovery specialist. When people have things they shouldn't, I...relieve them of those things, whether valuables or information."

"I see," Mozzie allowed, pushing his glasses up his nose again as he took notes. Not that he was unaware of the Cooper reputation, but how his patients presented themselves often revealed new insights. "And your mother, Coco?" he continued.

"She yells and shoots at Daddy when he works!" she responded immediately with a wide grin.

Carmelita frowned, not really liking that painting of her relationship with Sly. She decided to try and put a positive spin on it. "What she means is...I'm his handler," she offered finally. "He has a tendency to...do his own thing on mission, and it takes a mix of positive and negative reinforcement to make him behave. He...rather enjoys being chased, so that works for both."

Mozzie hid his amusement. As suits went, this one didn't seem to be so bad...and not just because she was very easy on the eyes and dressed to enhance that. "And your Uncles?" he asked Coco, gesturing to Bentley and Murray.

"Uncle Bentley hacks, and Uncle Murray beats people up and drives really fast!" Coco replied happily, beginning to enjoy watching her family squirm to cover her bluntness.

"She means I'm a data recovery specialist," Bentley explained quickly.

"And I'm a bouncer, and I drive our van," Murray added.

Mozzie nodded. "Coco, I can't help but notice your family is...rather mixed. Now, there's nothing wrong with this, but given your own differences I must ask...are you adopted?"

Coco sighed sadly, not liking these particular memories. "Mommy and Daddy picked me up when an evil overlord tried using me to power a gate to my homeworld."

Mozzie blinked, and turned to stare at Sly and Carmelita. This particular explanation was just so far outside his concept of reality he didn't know how to react.

Sly sighed softly. "She was kidnapped..."

"And her home was...gone," Carmelita concluded, gently pulling Coco into a motherly hug.

"Oh. I'm...sorry," Mozzie apologized. Noticing Sly immediately going to Carmelita's side to join in hugging Coco, he idly rubbed his chin. They do seem to make a good couple, and I have seen these sorts of things work... "I have to ask...are you two married?"

Carmelita's head jerked up. "What? No!" she snapped out emphatically.

"No!" Sly confirmed, sounding very intense.

Mozzie blinked in surprise. Equal intensity refusal on both, but different emotional drives. Curious. Well, I do need to see why... "Children do grow best in single unit households. For Coco's sake, I would suggest-"

"I can't be held responsible if you finish that sentence, and I didn't come equipped for capture," Carmelita interrupted.

"-we put a pin in this topic for now," Mozzie concluded nervously. This was going to take a while...

(1) Thanks to Philosophysics for this scene idea and dialogue base. Comment found here.
(2) Bonus points for anyone who recognizes the TV show I drew inspiration for this character from.

Professional Opinion

We met with Mozzie several times over the course of the next few weeks, and he asked lots and lots of questions. He seemed to know what he was doing, so I answered all his questions to the best of my ability...and at the end of it, he called Mom and Dad to meet with him alone. Neither of them ever talked about the outcome of the session, but it left them both a little disturbed...

Mozzie leaned back in his chair as he stared at Sly and Carmelita. "Well, I've thoroughly analyzed all of you, and I can say that most of your family is surprisingly healthy - mentally speaking - all things considered. With everything you've all been through, I fully expected a great deal more to have to deal with, especially where Coco is concerned. I think that's mostly due to you two. As parents, you're to be commended."

"We...we did our best," Sly offered modestly, rubbing the back of his head in embarrassment. "Neither of us were exactly ready for parenthood..."

"But we couldn't exactly turn our back on her, either," Carmelita concluded, clutching her left elbow in her right hand nervously.

"Yes, but that brings me to the actual issue that I feel might threaten your family's well being...and it comes down to the two of you," Mozzie continued. "Specifically, in how you see each other."

"Eh?" Carmelita asked curiously.

"How so?" Sly inquired guardedly.

"Simply put, in the eyes of each other, you each have three distinct identities," Mozzie explained. "Sly, in our talks you sometimes referred to the suit here as Carmelita, sometimes as Miss Fox, and sometimes as Inspector. As I've been able to determine, you see her as three different people: Carmelita is the girl you have strong feelings for, and want to romance; Miss Fox is Coco's mother, working with you as a parent to raise and protect her; Inspector...well, I believe that's self explanatory."

"That's who she is when we're 'on the job' and she's chasing me," Sly deduced. "I hadn't really thought about it...but yeah, I see your point...but not the problem."

"I'm getting there," Mozzie explained. "I prefer to lay out all the pieces before showing how they should fit together. The suit here sees you similarly." He turned to Carmelita. "In our one on one sessions, you referred to him as Sly, Mr. Cooper, and That Ringtail. While I don't normally like such derogatory terms, I can tell there's nothing specist about it. I'm sure you're clever enough to put together what each name refers to without me explaining it."

Carmelita grunted, turning away to hide the red tinge in her cheeks from Sly. "Mr. Cooper's Coco's Dad, and Ringtail is him as the Master Thief," she explained.

"And Sly?" Mozzie coached. "It's important that you face and admit to your feelings."

Carmelita grumbled under her breath, then sighed. "Sly the person, who - if he weren't also the thief - is someone I'd consider romancing without hesitation or regrets," she concluded, causing Sly's eyes to pop open in surprise.

"And there we see the problem," Mozzie explained softly. "As you've worked together to raise Coco, you've both seen sides of yourselves - and each other - you never expected, and it is causing problems in how you see yourselves and each other. This boundary you've erected in your own minds - the triple identity of the other - it isn't healthy. At the moment, it helps you both deal with the situation - you more than Sly, Carmelita - but in the long term it can be a major problem...especially if you allow the other's perspective of you to start to define your interactions. That could lead to a self imposed SPD. Not pretty."

"And...what do you recommend?" Sly asked worriedly.

"Simply put, you both need to think about how you stand with each other," Mozzie detailed carefully. "You need to find a way to rationalize this triple view of each other, and find a way to see past that so you only interact with each other's true selves. And that's where the difficulty lies...as it comes with a very difficult choice for both of you. And I don't know if there is an answer that solves things for all of you."

"Choice?" Carmelita asked, homing in on what she felt was the important point. "What choice?"

"Simply put...family or duty," Mozzie explained. "You can each either go by duty - Carmelita as an Inspector catching criminals including Sly, and Sly as a Master Thief - or go by family, raising Coco. As things stand right now, I cannot find a way the two can be rationalized healthily. I hope the two of you do, as it's the only way I can see you all finding peace with yourselves and each other...for Coco's sake." He slowly stood up. "Besides, if you do...maybe that original suggested solution I offered would actually be possible."

He glanced back and forth between the pair, who were plainly lost in thought. He then shrugged his shoulders. "I'll leave you two to talk things out, or not. But for right now, I promised Coco I'd take her to get some bubblegum ice cream."

The ice cream was surprisingly delicious. I'm not sure what I thought it would taste like, but I enjoyed it...at least once I was able to get high enough with it that Uncle Murray couldn't swipe it.

Desperate Measures

The next few months were...unpleasant overall. I get that whatever Mozzie said was important, but whatever it was really upset Mom and Dad. They were still the same with me when it was just one of them, and Dad was the same with Uncle Bentley and Uncle Murray...but with each other, it was like they were just going through the motions. Dad flirted, Mom sniped back. Dad went in for a theft, Mom chased him. Dad passed something at the dinner table when we had dinner as a family, Mom accepted in silence. It was driving me up the wall to the point I thought I was going to scream.

I tried to confront Mom about it once, since I had a hard time getting Dad alone. Getting Mom alone was easy, though. After all, she had to escort me for magic lessons...

Coco sat with her hind legs as crossed as she could get them, doing her best to meditate as Ms. Ruby was instructing her to. "Now breathe deep, child," Ms. Ruby instructed. "Feel the flows of magic as they come to you. Feel the power in the world around you. Feel the power inside you. Feel it spread, feel it contract...feel it claim the world around you. Now...take hold of it."

Coco furrowed her brow as she concentrated, trying to grasp all the power she could feel.

"Naw, naw, you're tryin' too hard, child," Ms. Ruby chided gently. "Relax and let it come to you. Bring it in with your breath, let it settle as you exhale."

Coco relaxed her body, taking the deep breath as she focused on gaining control of her magic. She smiled as she felt it slowly collapsing into her body.

"Now, picture something small in your mind," Ms. Ruby instructed softly. "Try and fit all that magic you can feel into that small thing." As she saw Coco's brow start to furrow, she chuckled. "You can start with a larger version, and then work it smaller."

Nodding, Coco selected the image of one of her sewing needles, deciding to start by fitting all her magic into the shaft of the needle, and for later stages fitting it into the shape of the eye, and then the eye itself. By the end of the hour, she'd managed to fit the magic into the overall shape of the needle, though had not yet gotten it fully contained.

"Times up," one of the guards spoke up.

Ms. Ruby smiled softly. "You're doing fine, child. It's only your fifth hour long session. It took me weeks of continuous training to get as far as you have."

Coco blushed in embarrassment. "I had a good teacher, Mz. Ruby-"

"Ah ah, it's Ms. now," Ms. Ruby corrected.

"...why is that?" Coco asked curiously.

Ms. Ruby smiled, blushing slightly. "Well, I been talking with Muggshot at mealtimes," she explained softly. "He's such a sweet pup once you get past his tough exterior. I...felt Ms. might be better for a while than Mz. ..."

Coco grinned widely. "At least until once you're both out, it's Mrs?" she asked impishly.

Ms. Ruby blushed brightly, grabbing a fan from her wall and waving it at Coco, playfully shooing her out. Coco giggled as she playfully fled, the bars of the - admittedly comfortable - cell closing behind her.

It wasn't long after that before Coco was in the sidecar of Carmelita's motorcycle, heading for her apartment to wait till Sly could pick her up. As they rode, Coco decided to take her opportunity to try and get answers out of her mother. "Mom?"

"What is it, Coco?" Carmelita asked distractedly.

"Why are you cold to Dad recently?" she asked worriedly. "I thought therapy was supposed to fix things."

Carmelita was silent for a time. "Therapy isn't about fixing problems," she replied finally. "Especially not family or couples therapy. It's about determining what the problems are, and whether they can - or should - be fixed."

Coco blinked for a time. "Okay. And...?"

"Your father and I have a problem that needs fixing," she stated flatly. "And we don't want you caught up in it, so we've agreed not to discuss it with or in front of you."

"But-"

"And we're sticking with that," Carmelita insisted. "And don't think you're going to get more out of me than that. I'm the one that taught you interrogation."

Coco crossed her forelegs and pouted.

"That won't work either."

Yeah, trying to press for answers didn't go well. Still, from what I could tell, one particular theft somehow made things somewhat better. We were there to steal the Venus De Whalo from a forger by the name of Dimitri Lousteau, at a party that Mom was running security for. My job was 'exit strategy', making sure we had at least three different getaway plans and that whichever one we wound up using was the only one that would show any sign we'd actually used it, and even that not enough to follow us. We wound up taking a boat...and I think something happened between Mom and Dad before Dad jumped onto the boat...

Sly and Carmelita stared at each other across the bridge, Carmelita with her stun pistol leveled, Sly with his cane in his hand. Both knew they were at yet another point where things could go either way, where Coco's future - and their own relationship - hung in the balance, and one wrong decision from either of them could doom both. Seconds ticked by as they locked eyes.

Carmelita lowered her stun pistol. "I...I can't keep doing this," she murmured softly. "I can't..."

"Carmelita," Sly whispered softly, starting to step forward.

"Don't," Carmelita insisted, lifting the pistol again. "I...I have to do my job. I...I have to take you in. But...I can't do that to Coco..."

Sly stepped back, lowering his head. "But...what other option is there?"

Carmelita thought frantically. "You could become a CI!" she offered hopefully. "A criminal informant. You're practically that already, since when I chase you I catch bigger crooks."

"But if I were an official CI, I'd have to have registered contact information," Sly countered sadly. "Which Seft might find."

Carmelita's gaze lowered. "But...I...I can't stop being a cop."

"And I can't stop being a criminal," Sly confirmed. A thoughtful look crossed his face, and he suddenly snapped his fingers. "Anonymous tips!"

"Hmm?" Carmelita responded, confused.

"Any time we're going after a big criminal, Bentley will see to it you get an anonymous electronic tip about that criminal's activities,and make sure you know it's from us while hiding any trail Seft could follow," Sly explained. "That will be enough to justify you looking around there, and seeing me there will let you chase me and uncover the evidence you need to take that criminal down, and our own actions will be limited because you'll be there waiting for us to start something."

Carmelita turned that over in her mind for a time...then smiled. "That could work," she allowed with relief as she steadied her grip on her stun pistol. "Of course, that assumes you can get away from me each time."

Sly grinned as he leaned back against the edge of the bridge. "Admit it, Carmelita. The chase is half the fun." With that, he tipped over the edge.

Pretty sure I'm not the only one who let out a yelp of surprise when Sly pulled that. He was literally inches away from missing the boat, and the Cooper Water Safety techniques only work if you land feet first. Still, whatever they talked about up on the bridge did them both some good. Both Mom and Dad had huge grins on their faces as we sailed away.

Chunin

Whatever Mom and Dad talked about on the bridge, it seemed to work well. They were able to talk together normally and even laugh together when we were being family. On the other end of things, Mom was always there whenever we went after a big criminal mastermind, dogging us every step of the way, and Mom and Dad were enjoying the chases again. Things between them on the romantic side were a little awkward, but they were working through it and that was enough for me. This gave me two very happy birthdays.

Of greater importance on my eighth birthday was the revelation that Dad thought I might be ready to have my own objectives on heists, meaning I'd no longer be relegated to either riding on his back or staying in the van except for when he was distracting Mom. ...for some reason, 'distracting' became some sort of joke to Uncle Murray and Uncle Bentley when Dad was explaining this all to me. It was apparently even funnier that I didn't get it.

Still, much like when it was being determined if I could leave the van during heists, I had to take a sequence of tests to determine whether or not I was ready...to be a Chunin.

The first was, surprisingly enough, a written exam...

Sly sat back behind a 'teacher's desk' as Coco, Bentley, and Murray sat in chairs. "Here's how this test is going to go," he explained simply. "I will be giving you each a written test of ten questions. You will each start with ten points, lose one point for each incorrect answer, and two points for each cheat I catch you using. Whoever has the most points at the end of half an hour wins. Coco, for you to pass this segment, you must have the highest score." He flipped over an hourglass timed to half an hour. "Begin."

Coco glanced down at the test as she flipped it over and blanched. None of the questions looked even remotely familiar, and she only vaguely recalled some of what they might be covering. She quickly glanced around the room to find a clue on what to do.

Bentley had quickly begun filling out answers, hiding his sheet so no one could cheat off him. No help there. Scattered around the room were various textbooks covering the subjects the questions addressed. Murray had walked straight to a folder labeled 'Test Answers' and taken it back to his desk. "Eight out of ten sounds pretty good to me," he mumbled to himself as Sly put a hand to his forehead and chuckled.

Coco frowned. Something about this whole situation felt achingly familiar...

Realization clicked in her mind. With a wide grin, she pushed the test forward, not writing anything on it.

At the end of the half hour, Sly collected the tests. "Murray, you got all the answers correct, but you didn't even bother to conceal your cheating, so you've got eight points." Murray rubbed the back of his head self-consciously. "Bentley, you got one answer wrong, so you have nine points."

"Drat!" Bentley snapped. "I knew number seven was a trick question..."

Sly glanced at Coco's test. "Coco...you didn't answer any of them."

"No incorrect answers!" she pointed out in a sing-song tone.

Sly chuckled and grinned. "And no cheating. Perfect score." Stepping forward, he ruffled her mane.

...and Mom said I'd never learn anything watching her anime collection.

The next test was another obstacle course...this one designed with my abilities in mind. The challenge was to get through the door at the other side of the warehouse within the time limit. Of course, Dad and I both knew that none of the obstacles actually proved a challenge to me - there was only so much that could be done to test me when I could shoot flame jets from my hooves (a new application of Flame Fu I'd developed after Ms. Ruby's magic lessons) - so to prove a point I walked out the entry door, around to the exit door, and stepped back inside.

The final test, however...was the last thing I ever expected. I was told that it would be a combat test, and I thought I was ready for anything, despite the opponent being a surprise...

Coco stepped into the outdoor arena, glancing around to find her opponent. "I'm here!" she called out nervously. "I'm ready for-" Feeling an odd tingle in her spine, she rolled to the side just as a quarterstaff whiffed past her shoulder, smacking hard into the ground.

That would have caught me in the head if I hadn't moved! Coco thought in surprise as she took in the figure of her assailant. He had a lithe, acrobatic figure, but his entire body was wrapped in a dark bodysuit. She couldn't even see the shape of ears or tail...or even if he had them. Even he was a guess, as she saw no mammaries. He lunged forward with the quarterstaff again, and Coco danced back out of the way as she unslung her cane.

She traded blows of staff to cane for a while, trying to get a sense of her opponent. However, she rapidly found she was quite outmatched. Whoever was attacking her knew every move she was throwing at them, and had a counter for every one. Even when she tried to use her flame techniques, her assailant countered by breaking open a nearby fire hydrant and soaking her and the surrounding area.

Dammit! Coco growled under her breath. Looks like I need to try out these new techniques if I'm going to have a chance...don't even know if I can get them to work... Her eyes widened as she saw the figure leaping upwards, only to land on a streetlamp and leave her temporarily blinded as she stared straight into it as it blinked on.

Covering her eyes, she leapt to one side...as her shadow took shape as a duplicate of herself leaping to the other, managing to conceal which of them was the shadow and which was the original as each moved independently. Coco grinned as she saw the figure pull back in shock as her vision returned. It had taken some effort to figure out how to apply her magic to the Thief Replica technique, but once again Mom's anime had helped by giving her the idea to apply it to her shadow. This was the first successful test, so it wouldn't last long...but it didn't need to.

Dashing forward, both of herselves kicked the lamppost near the base, causing it to tilt and drop the one riding it towards the water. Leaping off her copy, she dispelled it as her shadow returned and she leapt into the air. Focusing her magic into her hoof, she remembered how the technique had been described in both anime and manga, and what it had looked like in the game...

A sphere of electricity took shape on her hoof, and as she thrust forward it lashed forward in a ray, striking the water and electrifying it.

To her surprise, her foe leapt off the water before making contact with it, landing atop the fire hydrant. She quickly realized who she was facing and charged in, gathering the wind on her other hoof. She slammed the concentrated ball of wind and magic toward her foe, only to be redirected at the last moment into the hydrant by the quarterstaff.

The explosion of water sent them both flying.

Dad said I was a Chunin, ready to take my own objectives in the heists...just as soon as we both stopped sneezing.

Unfortunately, it wasn't long after that when we learned something horrible. Mom sent a message that someone had gathered surviving parts of Clockwerk's metal body, and they were on display in a museum in Cairo. She went on to say that she was assigned as additional security, specifically on the off chance that we might go after the parts given our history with Clockwerk.

We went in hoping things would be quick. Boy were we wrong...

Club Crashing

The first task to infiltrate The Black Chateau involved crossing the rooftops to realign Dimitri's satellite dishes to stream his information into Bentley's control antennae atop the Gang's temporary hideout. Sly took care of that task while Coco took on the next one, actually breaking into part of Dimitri's facility. As she was likely to encounter guards, she armed herself with extra knock out needles from Thief-net, and was accompanied by Murray.

The path selected turned out to be the wine cellar...and patrolled by rat guards, as expected. "Are you sure you've got enough needles, Coco?" Murray asked cautiously as he looked down at his diminutive niece.

Coco smiled softly. "Plenty," she whispered back. "Can you throw me up to the rafters? I'll have an easier time getting them all at once from above."

Nodding, Murray gently tossed her up, letting her catch the rafter above with her cane before scrambling up in silence. It didn't take her long to find the perfect position to throw. Drawing two needles with both front hooves, she hurled them in a single motion. All four guards clutched at their necks before dropping. Hopping down, Coco collected her needles, leaving the guards down for the count.

"Good job, Coco!" Murray complimented as he rushed forward, working a mechanism to open a path for Coco to advance. "Did you master that new skill Sly taught you? The one that lets you jump off air for normal maneuvering?"

"The 'double jump'?" Coco clarified. "Yeah. Works just like the safety techniques, but more efficiently. Easier than hopping off magic." She promptly leapt into the air before kicking off empty air, flipping over the partially open door to the other side.

"Good luck, Coco!" Murray called after her as she rushed forward.

The path forward had swinging laser security, but Coco's small size worked to her advantage as she raced between the beams unsinged, racing under the tables that crossed the faster grids without even having to duck. The bulkier guards with their flashlights were a momentary concern, but Coco had prepared for just such an obstacle with sharper, narrower needles coated in a more potent knock-out drug. One dropped the guard before they'd noticed her, letting her keep going.

Before long, she reached a vent leading into the nightclub proper, crawling through it and into a carpeted room with flashing lights in the corners. Another guard monitored a yellow laser grid that blocked her path, but the grid dropped with the guard after a properly placed thrown needle. Coco continued past a few coatrooms - glad to see this part of the club was actually closed for once - and reached an open foyer. Four rat guards patrolled across the way, making Coco curse under her breath. Due to positions, she couldn't take out more than two before she was spotted...so she had to take a different approach.

Ducking back into a coat closet, she stashed her thief outfit and pulled on a Buttercup Scout uniform. She then pulled out a box of cookies, and donned a Scout hat three sizes too large for her, positioning it so it would slip over her eyes at the slightest tilt of her head. With the disguise complete, she clip-clopped her way into the foyer.

One of the rat guards immediately caught sight of her. "Oy!" he barked out. "Who's dere?"

Coco let out a startled yelp, flopping over and dropping the cookie box as her hat dropped over her eyes. "I'll be good! I'll be good!" she cried out, making her voice as fearful as possible. "Just please turn the lights back on! I don't like the da~a~a~ark!" She then proceeded to sob.

Much to her surprise, the ploy worked flawlessly as all four guards were immediately at her side, helping her to her hooves and straightening her hat so she could see. "Now, no need ta weep, lass," one of the guard's spoke up. "Whatcha doin' down here? This ain't no place fer kiddos."

"I...I'm losted..." Coco whimpered, pulling out a map of Paris so badly drawn it resembled Uijeongbu. "I...I was supposed to meet with my troop to sell cookies, but I must have read the map wrong..." She sniffled, her expression obviously not far from absolute despair, and possibly crying again.

"We'll help ya, lass," one of the guards promised. "How about we each buy a cookie, then you tell us where you're meeting your troop, and we'll walk you there?"

Coco gasped hopefully. "Oh, would you?" she whispered breathlessly. "Oh, you guys are the nicest, sweetest guys I ever met!"

A quick transaction, and each guard was enjoying their cookie. "These 're delish!" one of them crowed happily.

"Now, where were you...meeting..." The talkative guard was the first to slump over as the knock out drug in the cookies did its work, and the other three soon followed.

Coco grinned widely as she silently slipped back to the coat room. "Works even better than I'd hoped," she whispered as she changed back into her thief outfit. Once changed, she made her way through another air vent, making her way to an observation deck through which she could see the very heart of Dimitri's operation. "Jackpot," she whispered as she started taking pictures of everything.

She made sure to get clear shots of every object in the chamber beyond, including Dimitri himself. She could hold plenty of photos, and she figured her Uncle Bentley could sort out which were important and which could be deleted. She did make sure to get good pictures of Dimitri, a generator, and what appeared to be a money printer built with Clockwerk's tail feathers, using them as printing plates.

With pictures taken, she made her way back to the safehouse to meet up with the others.

I was told I did an excellent job all around, and Daddy and my Uncles made much of me. As enjoyable as that was, the thrill of the op was exciting, and I was eager to get out there again, so I gently nudged Uncle Bentley into going over the pictures and coming up with the plan.

However, what he came up with was a great big 'insufficient information'. All we knew was that a direct assault - which we wouldn't have done anyway - would be suicide. However, he did have a few possible ways of getting new info.

First involved swapping a bugged painting for one in Dimitri's office. The other involved tailing him on the street. It was quickly decided I would take the first task, while Dad took the second...

Cucumber Cool

Getting the painting placed in Dimitri's office proved to be a cakewalk. With a good portion of the guards patrolling with Dimitri to watch his back while Dad tailed him, I barely even needed to sneak. The only problem I had was the painting was as heavy as me. However, I hit on an unexpected stroke of luck as I made my way to the office with it...specifically, not far outside it.

The heavy duty guard stared down at Coco as she practically hid behind the painting. "And just wut are ya doing with that paintin?" he demanded fiercely.

Coco shrank in on herself, doing her best to make herself as adorable and non-threatening as possible. "I-It's a Dimitri original..." she stammered out. "I...I was hoping he'd s-s-s-sign it..." She made her eyes water fearfully.

A huge grin split the guard's face. "Aww...I think he will." Bending over, he picked Coco and the painting up in separate hands. "But ya could use some help with that paintin. Wouldn't wanna damage it tryin' ta carry it when it's too big for ya."

Coco smiled softly. "T-thank you..."

"The boss is out o' the office raight now, but if'n ya wait there, he'll find ya!" With that said, the guard dropped Coco and the painting off in Dimitri's office. "Now don't touch nothin, ya hear?" With that, he turned and left.

With a smile, Coco swapped the paintings, and then slipped out the window with the original. Bentley'd told her that if she successfully retrieved it, he could sell it on Thief-Net for a good amount to finance further operations.

Dad's luck was as good as mine. He was able to follow Dimitri to a door that led to the club's aquifer, and saw him enter the secret code to open it. That information - and what we picked up later from the painting bug - gave Uncle Bentley what he needed to come up with a plan.

The first stage of the plan was executed simply. Uncle Murray went through the door to the aquifer and smashed the pump room to bits while Dad and I kept an eye out for interference and results. As expected, this resulted in water being piped into the club from the old water tower. This set the plan in motion.

Dad and I were to sneak into the theater to pick the guard's pockets for control keys for the spotlight control center to shut off security lights when the time was right. With the two of us in the shadows together, it would be a true cakewalk. While we were doing that, Uncle Murray would tackle the exterior alarm horns...literally. While that was going on, Uncle Bentley would be dropping the ball...the disco ball, specifically.

The only thing I found concerning at this point was that Mom still hadn't shown up. Of course, who we encountered instead...

As Sly and Coco crossed the rooftops, Constable Neyla dropped down in front of them, her whip clutched in her hand. "Hold it Coopers!" she snapped out, standing ready.

"Constable Neyla," Sly observed softly. "Another police woman hot on my tail."

Coco shot him a glare that promised 'I'm telling Mom!' if he didn't keep the flirting to an operation-minimum.

"Oh please, I led you here," Neyla countered playfully. "The only reason I was so open about the details of the documents when Carmelita asked was because I smelled your little pony in the rafters. Predator senses don't lie."

Coco winced, and made a mental note to develop a technique to keep her from giving off any scent or pheromones. "So why help us out?" she demanded quickly to cover the slip.

"You think I don't know why Carmelita asked in the first place?" Neyla countered. "She doesn't want those Clockwerk parts in the hands of the Klaww Gang anymore than I do, and for some reason she seems to think they'd be safe in yours. I personally think they'd be safer in police hands, but I'll follow her lead as far as it goes. After all, you can go places that - officially - Carmelita and I can't."

"So it's a race, then?" Sly asked slyly. "I'm all for a moonlit romp across the rooftops. Winner take all?"

Neyla chuckled softly. "Oh, I do love a man who catches on fast," she purred before leaping off into the night, Sly and Coco in hot pursuit.

Neyla proved to be nearly as maneuverable across the rooftops as Dad or I...which concerned me. While I'm all for the police having agents who can act like thieves, some of the techniques she utilized bore an unsettling resemblance to Cooper Clan techniques from out of the Thievius Raccoonus. While I would have liked to shrug it off as coincidence, the book was divided and scattered for a long time in the hands of criminals, especially Clockwerk. Between that and the Clockwerk parts being the focus of this investigation...

At the time, I thought I was looking too deep into it, so I didn't say anything about my suspicions. I'd come to regret that later.

After chasing her through Paris, she gave us a key to the nightclub's back door once we proved we could outrun her. This let Uncle Bentley take care of his part of the plan, while Dad, Uncle Murray, and I took care of ours. Once we'd pickpocketed the four keys, we were able to hop across the fans in the room to splice into the spotlight security guns, destroying the power boxes for the printing press room. ...I'm still amazed that nobody heard that.

After that, we all met back up at the hideout to plot out the last stage of the plan.

Operation: Thunder Beak

Uncle Bentley's plan took details from everything we'd done and put it together for the final big score. First, Uncle Murray helped Uncle Bentley break into the old water tower to shut down the plaza fountain. When a thug was sent with the keys for the repair truck to fix it, I pickpocketed them to hand them off to Uncle Murray, so they could take the truck while Dad climbed to the top of the Peacock Sign, which had lost many of the rivets holding it in place from the shock of Uncle Bentley dropping the disco ball inside the club. Of course, once the repair truck's winch was hooked to the sign, the guards came to investigate...which was where I came in. Taking a spot atop the truck, I threw my knock-out needles at each guard as they rounded the bends into the plaza, rendering them unconscious. At the same time, Dad hopped down to take them out further back.

By the time the guards stopped coming, the peacock sign had come crashing down beak first into the fountain, smashing through the roof of the counterfeiting operation. Dad and I immediately leapt down to get the Clockwerk tail feathers...and, as it turned out, confront Dimitri. He was...not happy to see us...

Once in the tunnel, it only took a few leaps for Sly and Coco to reach the center of the counterfeiting operation, shut down due to destroying the power supply. Dimitri was waiting for them, his pink-purple skin clashing violently with his puke green suit. He took one look at the pair as they approached and nearly spat. "Ack! So it's true that being a parent harshes all vibes, however old. You're totally crashing my house and bringing me down. Why can't you let birds and bees be free?"

"Because a certain bird needed to stay in the ground where we left him!" Coco snapped out, glaring at where the tail feathers were still hooked into the machine.

"You don't know what you're playing with, Dimitri," Sly warned. "Clockwerk was pure evil, and fed on hate and suffering. We may have killed him...but having already seen the dead walk, I'm not so sure it's permanent, and I'm not about to let you use parts of him in further criminal activities 'for the lulz' if there's a chance they might collect that energy to bring him back."

Dimitri rolled his eyes, a rather overstated facial expression for a lizard. "And if these tail feathers be so evil and dangerous, why do you not come and try and talk me into giving them up mapahce a lagarto, instead of trashing my club and beating up my employees?"

Sly and Coco exchanged a surprised glance. Truthfully, neither of them had thought about trying that even for a moment. "Truth to tell, Dimitri, I didn't think it was worth the attempt. I mean, after our last encounter, I probably wasn't high on your list of guests to give face time, right? If I'd come in as a customer, I'd have probably been shown the door."

Dimitri sighed. "I suppose I can give you that one. A reasonable conclusion, even if until your interruptions my operation had left me feeling quite magnanimous. You probably weren't aware of that, though."

"And even if you did hear me out, would you have listened?" Sly continued.

"Well, we'll never know now," Dimitri pointed out acidly.

"So...is this where we fight, or can we settle this diplomatically?" Coco asked hopefully.

"Ah, so the little one can see the big picture," Dimitri purred. "Look at all this money-"

"You do remember we're only here for the tail feathers, right?" Coco interrupted. "My question was more do we have to beat you up to get them, pay you for them, or are you going to just hand them over?"

"Well I'm not about to give them up with you coppin' that attitude!" Dimitri snapped disdainfully. "And what could you possibly give me that would be worth more than the money I'm printing?"

"Respect?" Coco suggested teasingly.

"You...you would actually respect me?" Dimitri asked hopefully, his eyes almost pleading.

"...honestly, no," Coco admitted apologetically. "Your fashion sense is eye-wateringly terrible, your brush technique on your forged paintings are subpar, your behavior is off-putting, and your 'kinetic aesthetic' is an insult to the nature of painting. It's all about control, patience, and vision. Swinging on ropes and brushing as you go by is little better than throwing paint at the canvas and calling it art-"

"And yet those paintings are accepted!" Dimitri roared in frustration. "At least with my kinetic aesthetic, I'm struggling to create a genuine image as the world itself fights against me! And yet 'paintings' of color flung carelessly at canvas and given clever names sell for thousands, while mine are ignored or derided!"

"If the point is the struggle against the world to create the masterpiece, why not revamp your 'kinetic aesthetic' as performance art?" Sly suggested as he leaned back against the counterfeiting machine. "Make the struggle to create part of the piece?"

"...performance art?" Dimitri asked thoughtfully, the gears almost visibly turning in his mind as he thought that over. "Do...do you think that could work?"

"Certainly!" Coco spoke up eagerly. "There are all sorts of new styles of performance art, and that reaches a much wider audience than just paintings. Beyond that, you could tape the performance, make copies, and sell good quality tapes of the performances with proper special effects for more than the painting would sell for, and it's easy - and legal - to make dozens of copies of the same tape to sell."

"Yes!" Dimitri crowed happily. "Dimitri's art will rise again! And fall, and rise, and swing on a trapeze with wings made of breeze!"

"We'll leave you to it, then," Sly offered as he turned to leave with Coco. "We should give you privacy to work here."

"Thank you friends, thank you!" Dimitri offered exuberantly. "I shall have a true masterpiece before the day was out!"

As Sly and Coco left, they shared a chuckle as Sly pulled out the tail feathers he'd swiped from the counterfeiting machine while they'd distracted Dimitri with talk of his art.

Because of the quiet nature of the confrontation, we made it out of there with the feathers in more than enough time to miss Mom and Neyla busting in to 'investigate the commotion' from our break in. They found Dimitri there surrounded by functional counterfeiting equipment (minus the print plates he was using the tail feathers in place of) with everything covered with his personal logo...while he was recording his attempts at making a true performance piece of his kinetic aesthetic. Would you believe he actually tried to claim it was storage space he was renting to someone else?

With Dimitri safely in jail and one Clockwerk part recovered, Dad decided we deserved a week off, so we drove down to Monaco to relax. I suspect this decision might have had something to do with overhearing Carmelita discussing her own plans for 'time off' with Neyla while taking Dimitri in...though I didn't say anything. Mom and Dad deserve to spend some time together too, after all.

India Interest

After our break in Monaco, we pursued the lead we had regarding the next Clockwerk part. This led us to India, in pursuit of the Tiger Rajan. He was apparently producing illegal spice of some sort, I wasn't clear on the details. However, our first attempt at getting parts from him apparently had nothing to do with that. He apparently went to great lengths to convince those around him - and himself - of being 'royalty', up to and including the purchase of an 'ancestral palace', where he would be holding a grand ball to show off his acquisition of the Clockwerk wings. Once we reached the area, we began to scout things out to see how we could best approach things.

Of course, for me that meant hunting down the safe for anything useful. Surprisingly enough, it was incredibly useful: blueprints for a melee weapon that induced a confused berserker state in anyone struck, causing them to ignore enemies and attack allies for as long as the effect lasted. Once I brought them back, Uncle Bentley had a surprisingly easy time adapting the design to our canes, giving us an impressive new weapon in our arsenal.

While I was doing that, Dad scoped out the area and found a way into the palace ballroom to take pictures for recon. What he discovered in those pictures caught us off guard, however...

"Mom's at the party?" Coco gasped in shock as the group gathered to go over the research photos.

"Yup," Sly confirmed. "Along with her partner Neyla. And as good as Neyla looked in that gold two piece...that little black dress of Carmelita's..." His tail swished idly as he looked dreamily up at the ceiling. "Oh, what I'd give to spin her around the dance floor tonight..."

"Could we also focus on the two other Klaww Gang members there, Arpeggio and Jean Bison?" Bentley spoke up insistently, gesturing to those pictures. "That's rather significant...not to mention the Contessa, who in the case of this ongoing operation is Carmelita's boss!"

Coco looked at the pictures carefully. Rajan was orange with purple stripes, and about Murray's size. Jean Bison was the same size, though red and bulkier, a buffalo by appearance. Arpeggio was a civilized feral parrot, being the size and shape of wild animals but with the civilized stance of a sophont, riding around inside a motorized cage. The Contessa had pale blue skin on her mamallian upper body, and dark purple chitin over her spider lower body. Coco shivered at the sight, as the figure reminded her far too much of her nightmares of Seft for comfort. Still, as a high ranking Interpol prison warden, she had a great deal of authority here.

The picture of Carmelita showed where Sly's mind had been at when he snapped it, as the angle of the picture highlighted how the fox lady's little black dress molded to her figure, and the way her dark blue hair was done up atop her head before framing her face. To contrast, despite Neyla's outfit being all the more stimulating (according to Murray), the picture was purely professional.

"So what's the plan?" Murray asked curiously. "I mean, we gotta get into the ballroom, get the wings, and get out without getting arrested, right?"

"Why would they arrest us when there are so many other criminals there?" Coco asked curiously. "If we could expose some of that in the ballroom..."

"Such as making Rajan freak out over reports of our antics, leading to him giving orders that get him and his goons arrested?" Sly asked curiously. "We'd need to keep him distracted long enough that he gets all the reports at once..."

Bentley looked over other details he'd found. "If we could get Murray into the palace grounds, he could do the heavy lifting while I activated the electronic winch to get the Wings out of the ballroom...and before that, he could use the armaments already in the grounds to take out the security chopper."

"In that case, I'll go get the drawbridge open," Sly stated, standing up to go.

"Hold on a moment, Daddy!" Coco called out, pulling out a roll of measuring tape. "There's something else I need to do first. Hold still."

Sly froze as Coco started measuring him all over. "Umm...what are you doing?"

"Making you a suit!" Coco explained. "You can swipe an invitation if need be while we're getting inside...and with that and a suit made for you, you can walk right in the front door and put on an impressive dance to capture Rajan's attention. Any wanna-be royal is going to be paying close attention to anything like that."

"You mean I get to dance with Carmelita after all?" Sly asked eagerly, causing Bentley to facepalm. "You're the best, Coco!" Leaning over to ruffle her mane, he leapt out to do his part.

While Dad went to unlock the winch and lower the drawbridge, I worked on his suit. It was the first time I'd made a complete outfit from scratch, but I was confident I knew what I was doing. Having Uncle Murray help me make a raccoonequin that matched Dad's measurements helped me to visualize, and by the time Dad had the drawbridge lowered, the suit was complete and ready for him to wear.

As it turned out, swiping an invitation wasn't necessary. Dad had checked with the door guard, and they would apparently let anyone in...as long as they met the dress code. Thankfully, the suit I'd made him met that dress code, so he'd have no problems getting in once we were ready to set the last part of the plan in motion.

Dirty Dancing

Once Dad had his suit, he made his way to go dance with Mom. While he was doing that for a 'distraction', Uncle Bentley, Uncle Murray, and I dealt with clearing the path for the rest of the job. My first task involved setting Rajan's elephants loose, which started inside their enclosure...or more specifically, under it.

Coco crawled carefully under the steps leading up to the enclosure entrance, startling a couple rats into running up into the enclosure. Doing so caused the elephants to startle in fear and escape their confines. This left Coco chasing the elephants down so she could snatch the headdress jewels off of them for a gem-sawblade Bentley intended to make. Getting onto the elephants' backs from the roofs proved easy. Getting the gems free of the headdresses would have been difficult normally, but Coco decided it was more efficient to unlace the headdress from the elephant's garb and pocket it whole. Once she had both, she headed back to the hideout for the next phase of the plan.

...well, they can't all be amazing! Anyway, after that I had to unlock the vault room for Uncle Murray and Uncle Bentley from the inside. This was easy enough, as I'd already been in there to unlock the vault. Uncle Bentley hacked the computers to gain control of the electronic winch, while Uncle Murray and I guarded him. Between Murray's brute strength and my diverse skills, we were able to do so readily. Uncle Murray had a moment of hesitation when some of the guards started using torches to spit fire at us...but my Flame Fu made short work of them.

After that, Uncle Bentley took out the surface-to-air defenses with an RC chopper. Not entirely his area of expertise, but he managed well. After that, he took out the bridge between palace and guest house to clear the area so Uncle Murray could use the electronic winch and gemsaw to swipe the Clockwerk wings through the skylight.

Of course, while all this was going on...Dad was enjoying playing 'distraction'...

As Sly strolled into the ballroom in his suit, he glanced around. While the ballroom was quite large, the dance floor could easily be seen from every point. He could see that Coco and the others were working fast, as Rajan had already sent most of his guards out to investigate the various disturbances, leaving very few left to distract. All that was left was finding the way to do it.

Much to his surprise, he saw Constable Neyla eyeing him, turning to move towards him. He figured a dance with her might get Carmelita's attention...but to his surprise, Carmelita moved to his side before Neyla could get there. "You seem light on your feet stranger," she murmured softly. "I find few of the men here can keep up with me on the floor. Care to give it a try?"

Chuckling, Sly gave a playful bow. "I'd be honored to try, Miss...?" He let the sentence hang to play into the fiction they were strangers meeting by chance.

"Fox," Carmelita responded as she let him lead her into a dance as the music began. Once they were dancing, she whispered to him, "What are you up to here, Sly?"

"Do I have to be 'up to' something?" Sly asked teasingly, his voice just as quiet. "Can't I just have heard you were here, and come hoping for a dance?"

Carmelita thought about that. "Alright, what are Coco and her Uncles up to?" she jibed.

Sly hid his laughter. "How'd you know it was me?" he asked carefully.

"A few ways," Carmelita countered. "First, by scent."

"And I was wearing a cologne to hide my natural scent," Sly countered playfully.

"The one I bought for you in Monaco," Carmelita pointed out. "Not exactly hiding well from me."

"Says the lovely lady wearing the perfume I made for her there in that beautiful city," Sly teased right back. "How else did you know me?"

"I recognized the stitching in your suit," Carmelita pointed out warmly. "Hoof-stitching is rather distinct."

"Much as it was in the swimsuit you were wearing when we met at the beach in Monaco Bay," Sly allowed, doing his best to keep his physical responses under control as Carmelita playfully pressed up against him for part of the dance. "Did you give her that design?"

"No," Carmelita chided. "I just told her what parts a swimsuit was supposed to conceal. She did the rest." She grinned from ear to ear. "It certainly got a reaction out of you."

"Did you have to tease me like that for it?" Sly complained playfully. "Are you hiding your cane in your trunks, or are you just happy to see me?" he quoted.

Carmelita let out a throaty chuckle. "Says the one who honestly responded 'both'." She smiled up at him. "But what really made it clear, once I saw those things..." She stared into his eyes. "Chocolate brown. I'll always know that shade."

Sly smiled down at her. "I'm glad we managed to work things out," he offered softly, lovingly. "I've missed this."

"This is the first time we've danced," Carmelita pointed out. "Though you dance quite well."

"As do you," Sly added. "But why'd you move to cut Neyla off so fast?"

Carmelita rolled her eyes. "Ever since she joined the force, she's read everything about you. Between that and knowing some techniques like your family ones...I think you might have a fan there." Her hands tightened their grip on Sly. "And I'm not about to let some fangirl get her claws on you. In love or war, Cooper...you are mine."

Sly grinned widely as he brought her into a dip, Murray and the wings already long gone. "Wouldn't have it any other way," he whispered softly, mightily resisting the urge to kiss her on the lips to seal the promise. Instead, he brought her back to her feet, kissed her hand, and left as a gentleman.

By the time Rajan got over being amazed by the dance, he reacted vocally to the missing Clockwerk Wings. Once they were named aloud, Mom and Constable Neyla could pull out their weapons and arrest everyone there. Rajan and the other Klaww Gang members got away, leaving their troops to be dragged off...

...which left us pursuing Rajan deeper into the jungle.

Author's Note

Part of Sly and Carmelita's interchange inspired by this picture.

Secret Spice

As it turned out, Rajan had withdrawn to a long forgotten temple deep in the jungle, which he'd transformed into the center of his spice production operation, running off the Clockwerk Heart. I still didn't understand what was so special about this spice that it was illegal, and neither Dad nor Uncle Bentley seemed willing to enlighten me at the time, assuming they knew themselves.

The jungle was too thick to drive through, so we had to walk. Well, Dad, Uncle Bentley, and Uncle Murray had to walk. I was still small enough to ride, and Dad insisted I conserve my energy, since we wouldn't have many opportunities to rehydrate. Just because I could keep myself from sweating didn't keep long walks in stifling heat from being dehydrating, and as the smallest mammal of the group, I had the hardest time staying hydrated.

By the time we reached the temple, it had actually started to rain. This made my initial hunt for the vault rather miserable, but still doable. At least the rain water was clean and drinkable. Once I opened the vault, I found more weapon schematics Uncle Bentley could adapt to our canes, these to release an electrical discharge when attacking.

After I got back from retrieving that, Dad decided I should see to the elephant driven scanners, since I had a better way with animals than anyone else, mostly because Ferals saw me as an infant rather than an interloper. Personally, I think the decision was more driven by the fact it was dry, warm, and toasty in the hideout while I was still wet from hunting the vault...

"So, what's the plan, Uncle Bentley?" Coco asked as she glanced through her Binoc-U-com from the elephant to the spice plants Bentley had holo-tagged.

"The spice plants around here are illegal because if you eat too many, you go into an uncontrollable rage," Bentley explained.

"Then why the heck would anyone want to buy them?" Coco demanded in confusion.

"Criminals who want to drive their victims into said rage?" Bentley suggested.

"...carry on..."

"If you slip some of the spice plants into the elephant's feed bag, the surge of rage should override its domestication training, and it'll break free," Bentley clarified. "Destroying the satellite array in the process. However, they only grow high up in the jungle canopy. Are you sure you're up to the climbing?"

"Certainly," Coco stated firmly. "Besides...with all the other techniques I've done and developed specifically for my magic...there's another one I want to try."

Frowning in concentration, Coco made her way to the tree nearest the elephant that had a spice plant at the top. Rising up on her hind legs, she placed her forehooves against the bark. She then lifted her left hind hoof and placed it there as well.

Closing her eyes and focusing her magic, she lifted her right hind hoof.

A slow smile crossed her face as she felt her magic interacting with the living earth magic in the tree, letting her scale right up the side as long as she kept three hooves against the bark at a time. As she walked up the side of the tree, however, a very close call came.

"Hey!" One of the guards asked his fellow. "Did you just see a tiny pony walking up the side of a tree?"

Coco mightily resisted the urge to freeze in fear, continuing her climb slowly and steadily.

"No, and neither did you," the second guard replied.

"But-"

"If you're seeing things, you're in trouble for nipping at the boss's wine," the second guard detailed. "If'n ya ain't, do you really think we can handle a pony that can - among other things - walk up trees?"

"...right, I didn't see nothin'." The two guards continued their patrol.

With a sigh of relief, Coco took her hoof out of her mane and placed it back against the bark to continue her climb, the needles left where they were. It didn't take long to retrieve all six spice plants and deposit them into the elephant's feed bag. Once it snacked, it went on a rampage, smashing the satellite array to bits as it broke free.

After that, I unilaterally decided it was Dad's turn to handle a few jobs while I stayed snug and warm with some cocoa and blankets after drying off. Dad was more than willing to take the next job, involving bugging Rajan's office...with a unique species of water beetle, of all things. While this was going on, Uncle Bentley - who wasn't bothered by the rain at all - managed to get a hold of the blueprints to the entire operation, letting us plan out a way to get the Heart right out from under Rajan's nose...which apparently involved flooding as much of the place as necessary to make Rajan pull a runner with the Heart before bum rushing him. On Dad's instruction, I was left out of that entirely.

I suppose I couldn't blame him for that decision, since I...hadn't reacted well after the fact to the spice plants I'd harvested for the elephant, so keeping me away from the spice making operation was a good idea. Beyond that, if Rajan had been exposed to too much of his spice, he'd probably be close to Feral, and see me less as person and more as prey. This left it to Dad to blow up the spice production operation.

It also left him to deal with Constable Neyla's arrival without me. I don't know what she and Dad talked about, but she led Dad to a secret entrance to steal half the Clockwerk Heart, leaving Rajan keeping the other half on his person - or more specifically, his staff - at all times.

...I don't know how many times everyone's told me I can't blame myself for what happened next. Doesn't stop me from doing it anyway...

Combat Costs

While I did stay inside the hideout for most of the remaining missions there...I did sneak out when Dad, Uncle Murray, and Uncle Bentley all went out to set the last stage in place. Now I didn't get anywhere near the action, or where the water would go...but I was worried, and I wanted to see what was going to happen.

It's a good thing I stayed back. The plan wound up turning the dense jungle into a swampy quagmire! The only dry place I could hide in was the turret Uncle Bentley had used to keep Uncle Murray from getting bombed. He scolded me for coming out, of course, but our focus quickly turned to the fight that unfolded, since Rajan came out of the temple to flee the water.

Rajan stared down at the water pouring out of his temple to flood the land, and angrily thrust his staff - with half the Clockwerk Heart on the top - towards the heavens. "Black Clouds and Thunderbolts!" he proclaimed dramatically. "My Spice Temple...ruined!" He pointed out towards the scenery before him. "I will no longer hide while you villains destroy my hard won empire! This place is mine! Here I am king! Come, face me Cooper! With Clockwerk's black heart, I will show you true power! You are nothing! Come face the mighty Rajan, Lord of these Hills!"

"Did he eat Shakespeare or something?" Coco whispered to Bentley.

"Not enough thees and thous for that," Bentley pointed out. "But yeah, way too dramatic."

To Coco's surprise, Constable Neyla joined Sly in trying to seize the Clockwerk Heart from Rajan, who used it to try and drive them back with bolts of lightning. "What's she doing here?" Coco demanded worriedly. "And...why hasn't Mom shown up?"

"She did help Sly get in to get the other half," Bentley pointed out. "I...think we can trust her."

"I hope you're right," Coco observed worriedly as she watched Sly and Neyla leap from fence top to fence top in Spire Jumps. "I just don't like how many Cooper techniques she seems to know..." Her eyes widened as the pair reached Rajan, only for Neyla to leap away. "What the-?" A blast of lightning knocked Sly from his perch. "Daddy!"

"Quiet, Coco!" Bentley hissed instantly, covering Coco's mouth. "I don't know what's going on now...but we definitely don't want Neyla to know we're here."

As they watched, Murray leapt down to where Sly had been blasted to, only for Rajan to leap after him, trapping them both in a ring of lightning. They talked for a while, then began trading blows.

"Why can't we hear them?" Coco demanded quietly.

"We're a little far away," Bentley explained. "Hold on, while I tune into Sly's Binoc-U-com. We should be able to hear somewhat..."

Before long, the signal was activated, just in time to hear Rajan order several of his guards, "Dispatch this fool!" The guards leapt down to attack Murray, only for him to grab hold of them and use them as bludgeons against Rajan.

"I didn't know Uncle Murray took levels in 'Improvised Weapon: Enemy'," Coco marveled.

"We really need to get everyone together for a family campaign one of these days," Bentley murmured to himself.

It wasn't long before Rajan's best efforts proved ineffective against Murray's strength, leaving Rajan unconscious and the Clockwerk Heart half in Murray's possession...just as Neyla arrived, shortly followed by Carmelita and the Contessa. Sly's Binoc-U-com was in range to pick up what Neyla said.

"There they are, Contessa," Neyla purred. "Just as I promised. The Cooper Gang and Rajan all incapacitated."

Pulling out her own Binoc-U-com, Coco could see Carmelita's eyes take on a worried look, though the rest of her expression remained stoic. The Contessa spoke up. "Excellent work, Constable Neyla. Carmelita's never been able to catch the Cooper Gang, yet you capture them in just a few short weeks."

Carmelita tensed up, but said nothing. However, as it turned out, Neyla was far from finished. "Actually, Contessa, there's a good reason Carmelita's never captured the Cooper Gang...because she's been in league with them the whole time!"

Carmelita visibly tensed from the accusation. "That's a pretty bold claim," she growled out fiercely. "I hope you have some proof."

"Indeed," Contessa agreed calmly. "What proof do you have, Constable Neyla?"

Smirking, Neyla pulled out a large folder. "Quite a bit." She pulled out a picture. "First, here is a picture of Inspector Carmelita dancing with Sly Cooper the night the Clockwerk Wings were stolen." Before Carmelita could respond, she pulled out another picture. "And here they are together at Monaco Beach Bay a week before."

Carmelita's eyes widened in shock.

Grinning widely, Neyla laid out her coup de grace. "And here are a sequence of emails Inspector Carmelita has received from the Cooper Gang, informing her ahead of time where they would be striking and what they'd be after...several of her biggest 'busts', if I'm not mistaken. She was in league with the Cooper Gang and using their exploits to bust lesser criminals to make herself look good!"

Carmelita's stun cannon dropped from her suddenly nerveless grasp, staggering back as she saw her whole life being so expertly unraveled, and presented in the worst possible way.

"That is certainly incontrovertible proof," the Contessa concluded. "Men! Arrest former Inspector Fox, and take her and the Cooper Gang away!" As Carmelita was dragged off, the Contessa shook her head. "Such a shame, when a good officer falls from the light."

"Yes...indeed," Neyla purred softly.

Bentley stared in shock. He wanted to curse, to shake his fists at the sky, to swear vengeance on Constable Neyla...but he had to be there for Coco. Turning to look at her, however, he saw an expression on her face that left him staggering back in terror. After all...he'd seen what her magic could do.

That...that BITCH! She took my Dad...she took my Mom...she took my Uncle Murray...she stole my family!

Well, I wasn't going to stand for that. If looks could kill, she'd have been dead where she stood, along with a swath of grass behind her. One thing was certain. I would get my family back. And I would make her pay.

...and I was going to do it my way.

Wrath of the Earth

By the time Uncle Bentley got me back to the hideout, we found it already overrun by the Contessa's goons. Apparently, Neyla had tracked the active Binoc-U-Com signal there, and they were already making off with the Clockwerk parts we'd collected. We did manage to get to the van undetected, though it took an entire week for Uncle Bentley to track down Mom, Dad, and Uncle Murray...a week where my rage continued to grow.

It turned out they were locked up in a new prison in Prague run by the Contessa. Though apparently it was some sort of 'criminal rehabilitation center', using 'hypnotherapy' to turn criminals into upstanding citizens. Word from within the center - from Ms. Ruby herself - was that she used hypnosis to get the ill-gotten fortunes of her inmates for her own, brainwashing them into being 'good people'. Ms. Ruby and Muggshot hadn't been slated for it as of yet, but it was only a matter of time. And Mom, Dad, and Uncle Murray were at the top of the Contessa's list.

I was not going to let that happen. And with the message from Ms. Ruby...I knew just how to do it. I hoped I lived up to her faith in my abilities...

Bentley watched nervously as Coco stepped out of the back of the van and onto the grass of park, plainly ready to act...whatever she was intending. She had traded out her normal thief attire for a very different look. Her entire body was covered in painted designs, with necklaces of beads, stones, and teeth around her neck. A loincloth hung under her tail, and her cane was decorated with skulls of birds, ferrets, and weasels filled with mummified bones that rattled in the skulls with every movement. Feathers were woven into her mane and tail, and paint covered her face in runic designs. As she stood there, ready to act, Bentley had to consciously remind himself that she was eight. "Sly and Carmelita are not going to be happy to see you done up like that," he grumbled, averting his gaze.

"If it means I've gotten them out safely, they can scold me all they want," Coco stated as she walked up to a clear spot on the ground. Digging the butt of her cane into the ground, she drew out a circle and runic designs around herself. Swinging the hook of her cane, she pulled out several vials of potion she'd prepared and scattered their contents over the ground around her. The air shimmered with the feeling of magic. "You might want to step back...and be quiet."

Swallowing convulsively, Bentley took several strides back. He didn't know what Coco was planning, but it was giving him the heebie-jeebies already.

Coco lifted her cane and shook it, making the bones rattle around. "Shtey erd folgn..." she chanted, her voice suddenly much deeper than it was normally. She repeated her chant as she proceeded to dance, an odd hopping skip that planted her hind hooves in each of the gaps the runic design she had shaped around her left. As she chanted and danced, the design began to glow as her golden magic poured off her body, mingling with the green magic all around her and seeping into the Earth. As her voice rose to a fever pitch, the ground began to shake.

Bentley staggered back against the van, his eyes popping open as he saw something he never would have believed. Stone hands erupted out of the ground all around Coco as men of stone slowly clawed their way out of the Earth, seeking the air above. One after the other they dragged themselves from the dirt as red magic began to flow out of Coco's chest to infuse the fifty - yes, fifty - stone men that stood arrayed before her, facing the prison. As the magic flared brightly, Coco shouted out three more words.

זריחת

Upon the back of each stone man, a symbol engraved itself...one Bentley recognized from math calculations as 'Aleph'.

ארץ

A second symbol was driven into the stone...and by pattern, Bentley realized it could only be 'Mem'.

צייה

A final symbol etched deep in the rock...and Bentley recognized it as 'Tav', completing the golems Coco had raised to do her bidding.

Coco slumped over her cane, struggling for breath. She'd poured all her rage, all her pain, and all her sorrow from being separated from her family into her creations...and the lion's share of her available magic to make them work. However, she knew she had done enough. Once she had her breath, she lifted her cane...and pointed at the prison.

The eyes of the golems glowed, and they began their march, five rows of ten. They tromped down the street straight for the prison. When patrol guards attempted to stop them, they were tossed off the road. If they persisted, they were backhanded away into unconsciousness. If encountered on a bridge, they were tossed into the water. If vehicles blocked the path, they were either picked up to be thrown or walked over...or through.

Unimpeded by anything they encountered, the golems continued their mindless, soulless march to carry out their objective. As the walls of the prison approached, the golems spread out and charged. Each one drove through the stone walls, leaving behind a cartoonish silhouette hole that changed shape as each one followed after. Those that charged the steel doors knocked them from their hinges before stomping right over them. As the alarms sounded, the guard towers turned their machine guns on the golems.

As some of the golems broke down from the machine gun fire, others charged the towers, taking out the foundation and causing the gunners to tumble to the ground. They were caught before they hit the ground and buried up to the neck in the solid stone of the prison grounds, while the broken golems reassembled themselves with the stone of the collapsed towers. Soon the alarms were accompanied by screams of terror...but the golems continued their march heedless of those screams, smashing their way into the prison itself.

Bentley stared in awe, and more than a touch of fear. "Uh...Coco?" he asked worriedly.

"Yes?"

"How...how are you going to erase the Aleph to make them stop?" he asked worriedly. "It's...it's driven pretty deep into the stone."

"...I'll worry about that after Mom, Dad, and Unlce Murray are safe," Coco stated bluntly. "In the meantime...there's someone I have to find..." Clutching her cane, she rushed forward in the wake of the destruction. Groaning, Bentley rushed to follow.

The Tangled Web

My golems were making a mess of the prison, though some had gone off in a different direction for some reason. I didn't find out why until later, though I'm glad they brought back what they found. But that's for later.

While I was searching the prison for signs of Mom, Dad, and Uncle Murray, I did come across someone else...and that was an interesting meeting.

As Coco raced through the halls of the prison with chaos - and her golems - raging all around her, she was caught off guard as she heard a familiar voice calling out to her. "Chile? Little Coco, is that you?"

Turning, Coco's eyes widened in surprise. "Ms. Ruby!" she called out, rushing over to the open cell. "You're alright!"

Ms. Ruby chuckled as she leaned back in her cell. "And look at you, lil' lady! Done up proper for callin' the spirits. This mess your doing?"

Coco nodded slowly. "Yeah. I...I used earth magic and my anger to animate some golems to trash the prison to get Mom, Dad, and Uncle Murray out."

"Yeah, ah heard they were locked up here," Ms. Ruby murmured softly. "Wouldn'a believed it if I hadn't seen 'em dragging Miss Fox off. But...whadda ya mean 'some golems'?" Her eyes narrowed suspiciously.

Coco wilted under that gaze. "I...I only managed to raise 50. I...hope that's not too disappointing..."

Ms. Ruby stared at Coco, her eyes wide...and then burst into laughter. "First time...makin' constructs...and she..." Ms. Ruby gasped for breath amongst her laughter. "And the lil' lady...thinks only 50 is disappointing!" By the time she got her laughter under control, she saw how Coco had wilted in on herself and shook her head. "Coco, I been working my magics for decades...and I'd still hesitate ta work with golems. Even if I did, I'd have a hard time getting one ta do what I wanted. Ya got 50 at your age on yer first try, and they ain't killed no one! Golems powered by rage...historically, they always end in massacres. But yours...they self repair, they don't kill..." She shook her head in amazement. "Knew ya were natural born ta this magic...but I'm stunned."

Coco let out a sigh of relief. "I was worried I hadn't lived up to your expectations."

"I'ma stop expectin' things from ya, cause I'll never be able to judge 'em accurately," Ms. Ruby stated firmly.

"So...where's Muggshot?" Coco asked curiously. "And The Panda King?"

Ms. Ruby grinned. "Soon as they tried ta feed Panda King that spice, he refused ta eat. When they tried ta force him, he shouted 'Blazing Soul' and got covered in flames hot enough to melt metal. Then he just walked out. I knew the spice ta be devil's work, but my blood's too cold for it ta work on me. Muggshot's still in his cell, and he cuts the outside of his meat - where the spice is - off before eatin'."

"How come you're both still here?" Coco asked curiously.

"Just cause the warden's corrupt don't mean our sentence is over," Ms. Ruby explained logically. "We want out by the law, so we can be there for ya." Smiling, she brought her hand down to her somewhat swollen abdomen. "Sides...after that last blackout a few months ago...well, I ain't in no condition to go runnin' nowhere, and Muggshot ain't about ta go off without me. Just keep the golems away from the foundations over here, kay?"

Coco grinned with a happy squeal, nodding eagerly. Steeling herself, she dashed off to complete her mission.

My talk with Ms. Ruby helped me feel a little bit better, but my work wasn't done yet. I...I could feel what my golems discovered, and knew that Neyla was nowhere in range. But the Contessa still was, and I'd learned enough to discover she was working for the Klaaw Gang all along. Which meant I had to confront her.

And I knew just how to do it...

The Contessa leapt up onto the walkway on the prison's outer wall, being careful where she stepped. The holes in the walls were already making footing precarious, and the golems had ripped her giant water tower battle robot to pieces as soon as it activated. Now she had to get to her escape blimp as fast as she could before one of those golems got hold of her and tore her apart.

"Going somewhere?"

That voice, coming from her blimp of all places, stopped her in her tracks. Stepping off the blimp was the pony that Neyla had privately warned her about, the one that Cooper and Carmelita were raising together. "This...this is all your doing, isn't it?" she hissed out as she backed up a few steps as she reached to her sides. She'd left some of her thread along the walltops for emergencies, making a web she could use. All she needed to do was keep Coco distracted long enough to not notice what she was doing.

"Yes," Coco confirmed calmly. "Those are my golems...filled with the rage, pain, and sorrow of having my family torn apart and taken away from me. And they have two targets they're searching for specifically to unleash that rage upon. Neyla's one of them. And you're the other."

"Is...is that supposed to frighten me, child?" the Contessa countered, managing to recover her usual urbane tone somewhat. "You really expect me to believe you're going to kill me?"

"I don't want you dead...not yet," Coco responded coldly. "First, I need to get my Mom off the hook...which means I need to get you to talk."

The Contessa laughed as she found a strand of her web. "I'm done talking!" she snapped as she yanked on it, only for a sewing needle to get stuck in the chitin of her lower body. "What the-?"

Smirking, Coco gave her cane a sharp tug. The altered web collapsed around the Contessa, wrapping her up until she couldn't move, leaving her hanging off the inner edge of the wall by a thick rope attached to Coco's cane hook. "Really? Thread, against a combat seamstress? I expected better."

The Contessa started to struggle, but stopped as she looked down and saw several golems gathering, their featureless faces turning glowing red eyes up towards her, hands of stone reaching up to grasp her. "W-what do you think you're doing? Pull me up!"

"Not just yet," Coco murmured softly. "First, I need you to talk." She held up a tape recorder. "You're going to confess your every crime, of your own free will. Then we'll talk about pulling you up."

The Contessa suppressed a smirk. The child was such a fool, if she thought any Interpol precinct would accept evidence provided by a criminal. Still, if playing along got her away from those...things, then it was worth it. Here in Prague, fear of the golem was simply too ingrained to brush away. "Alright, I'll talk."

Smiling, Coco pushed the record switch, and the tape began to turn. "Now, this confession is given freely and of your own will, without coercion of any sort?" Coco asked carefully.

The spider woman rolled her eyes, but played along. "Yes, this truth is told of my own will."

"Start at the beginning, then," Coco stated calmly.

"It starts with my late husband the admiral," the Contessa explained. "His death wasn't intentional, whatever the rumors declare, but it was my fault." She chuckled softly. "He was old, I was young...and his heart wasn't as up to it as the rest of him was. Need I go on?"

"Not in that area," Coco replied, her tone showing she wasn't quite following but was certain others would.

"However, his death was my awakening to the less legal side of the world," the Contessa continued. "Using his fortune, I built the prison, seeing what I could do with criminals when I had free reign. I used my hypnotic abilities to brainwash former criminals into becoming productive citizens...and part of their 'rehabilitation' process was telling me where they'd hidden all the loot that Interpol wasn't aware they'd stolen, giving me what I needed to acquire it for myself, and then forgetting all about it. It was surprisingly easy. It was no surprise when I was scouted for the Klaaw Gang."

"So you're a member?" Coco asked carefully. "What other members do you know about?"

"Just three that haven't been arrested yet," she replied. "Arpeggio, Jean Bison, and Neyla."

"Constable Neyla is in the Klaaw Gang?" Coco asked in surprise.

The Contessa chuckled darkly. "She's the one who recruited me. She's also the one gathering the Clockwerk parts that were stolen and scattered, why I don't know. Just as I don't know who's actually in charge of the Gang." Seeing Coco turn off the recorder, she smirked. "So that's enough for you?"

"Yup, that should be more than enough to put you away for life and put Neyla on the run," Coco confirmed.

"Good luck getting any Interpol agent to listen to that recording," the Contessa snapped, then winced. She hadn't meant to say that until after she was pulled up.

"Oh, they already were," Coco explained. "There's a transmitter in this recorder, and I have a friend in Mom's old precinct who was listening to - and recording - every word. And it's perfectly admissible, just as if I was wearing a wire." She grinned widely as she saw the Contessa's eyes widen. "And that just leaves us with one thing."

"...pulling me up to face my sentence?" the Contessa asked morosely.

"Not quite," Coco replied, laying across her cane and pulling out her sewing shears. "You see...those golems down there? Powered by my rage, pain, and sorrow...the darkest parts of my soul, without any conscience to guide them. I have to wonder...when I'm like that, at my absolute darkest...am I capable of cold blooded murder?" She smiled down at the Contessa. "What do you think?" When the Contessa only stared up at her in fear, Coco chuckled. "It's important to know that about yourself, wouldn't you say?" She brought the shears down to the rope holding the Contessa up. "Let's find out."

She cut the rope.

The Contessa screamed in absolute terror as she fell into the grasp of the murderous golems...who reshaped themselves around her into a solid block of stone that encased her entire body and covered her eyes and ears, leaving her enough room to breathe and scream but nothing else.

"Hmm..." Coco murmured as the spider continued to scream in terror. "Even at my darkest...I can be childishly cruel, but I don't have it in me to kill in cold blood. Even golems powered only of my hate won't kill the object of that hatred. ...I can't tell if that should be comforting or disconcerting."

Of course, setting things up so the Contessa would get arrested didn't magically clear Mom's name, much as I would have wanted it to. Still, my golems had found Mom - and the Clockwerk Eyes - at the Contessa's Castle, and brought both back along with Dad and Uncle Murray...who still had the half of the Clockwerk Heart he got from Rajan. I didn't ask how he'd kept it hidden from the Contessa.

Besides, a more important conversation was taking place back at the van...

"Coco!" Carmelita gasped in shock as she caught sight of her equine daughter. "What is that thing you're...not wearing?"

Coco groaned, rolling her eyes. "Mom! This is a traditional priestess garb for using dark powers to channel the spirits of the earth!"

"Well channel them in something respectable!" Carmelita snapped out angrily. "No daughter of mine is going to run around a prison looking like a back alley whore!"

"That's culturally insensitive!" Coco complained.

"There's a difference between being a good parent and being PC," Carmelita countered sharply. "Guess which I'm trying to be?"

"I'm in full agreement with your mother there, Coco," Sly spoke up. "That outfit just draws attention to how little you're wearing. It's practically begging to be picked up by someone unscrupulous."

"But I need it to keep the golems under control!" Coco whined.

"Uh...not so sure about that," Bentley pointed out, beckoning everyone over to his Binoc-U-com.

At the prison, Interpol agents had arrived to clean up and arrest the Contessa. As soon as they were in position, the golems released the Contessa and the other guards they'd been holding and marched to the center of the courtyard. Once there, they began to march in a circle until all were in a perfect circle. Raising their hands, each golem drove one stony finger into the back of the golem in front of them, obliterating the Aleph that was engrave deep in. All their eyes went dark at once.

"There you have it, golems are under control," Sly concluded. "Now go get changed!"

Coco grumbled petulantly as she climbed into the van.

Carmelita slumped against the side of the van. "And now this on top of everything else? I thought the rebellious phase didn't kick in until puberty..."

The Frozen North

With the family all back together, I was much more at peace with myself...for the moment. Still, Uncle Murray was acting a little off, not that we could blame him after what had happened. We were all a little off. Still, for some reason Uncle Murray's behavior stuck in my mind...

Dad thought the first thing we should do was to get Mom reinstated on the force and get her record cleared...but Mom vetoed that immediately. With both Neyla and the Contessa exposed as members of the Klaaw Gang, scrutiny would be high everywhere as Interpol hunted Neyla and the other Klaaw members down. She said our priority would have to be on the Clockwerk Parts. Not only would that lead us to the remaining Klaaw Gang members - and Neyla - the parts had to be destroyed. They were simply too dangerous.

Thankfully, we knew where to find one member of the Gang. The trail of spice shipments led to Nunavut Bay, Canada, the secret hub of Jean Bison's shipping empire. On our way there, I learned a bit about the man. Apparently, he wound up frozen for 120 years, leading to him being a bit out of his time. Behaviors and attitudes that were perfectly acceptable in his day had him an outsider in the present. Kind of a pity. It made me wonder if there was any way to save him...

That would have to sit on the back burner, though. He had quite a few of the Clockwerk Parts - both lungs, the stomach, and the talons - which was rather concerning considering what the other Klaaw Gang members had been using theirs for. That much of Clockwerk's body in the hands of one man who was using it...we had to act fast.

Once we had a base of operations set up, I went looking for the Vault while Dad did some scouting. I actually crossed paths with Dad while hunting the vault, since we both had to go into that cabin for our respective missions. Once I'd raided its contents, though - designs for a music box that played on a specific harmonic that forcefully induced sleep - Dad insisted I go back to the hideout so Mom didn't worry. I went, wishing Dad as much luck on his run as I had on mine.

Of course, Dad had much better to report from his excursion. Not only did he get the blueprints for all three Iron Horses - the trains Jean Bison used to deliver his spice, powered by the Clockwerk Lungs and Stomach - he also brought back pictures of their routes and information about a 'Northern Lights Battery'. On top of that, he connected Uncle Bentley to a satellite dish that would let him track all three trains all the time.

...no, I wasn't jealous. Why would you even think that? To be perfectly frank, I was glad to get to sit on the sidelines for a bit. My magical reserves still weren't fully recovered from Prague, and we didn't exactly have time to let me take a week's siesta...so taking it easy was the next best thing.

Then came the plan for how to get into the trains...and Mom caught all of us off guard.

Bentley laid out the information he'd put together from what Sly had gathered. "Alright, we know where in the trains the Clockwerk parts are. Unfortunately, the Parts let the trains run day and night, so we can't just wait for them to shut down for the night. We'll have to get the parts while they're running...which is going to be tricky. The only entrance is a hatch on the roof of the caboose of each train, and it's locked shut. There's no way we'll be able to get the keys, so we'll need to blow the locks open."

He shifted the visual to a picture of the sky. "Thankfully, Jean Bison's operation is actually helpful to us here. There are balloons of ultra-unstable denatured spice gas floating all over the place. If you're able to gather enough of it, Sly, you can attach the canister to the hatch and blow it open...but you'll have to land on the caboose, or the gas will explode before you can detach the canister." He rubbed the back of his head nervously. "The gas is highly unstable at lower altitudes, after all."

"That sounds needlessly reckless, not to mention dangerous," Carmelita observed. "One mistake and Coco loses her father."

"Not all that different from most of what we've done," Sly pointed out.

"Yeah...that's about standard for what Dad goes through," Coco agreed, much to Carmelita's displeasure.

"It just seems foolish to not use a much simpler, safer option when it's available," Carmelita countered irritably.

"And what would you suggest, Carmelita?" Bentley asked curiously.

"I switch my cannon from 'stun' to 'armor pierce' setting, and use the focused electrical discharge to blow the lock off," Carmelita explained simply. "No risk of any of us getting injured, and the 'armor pierce' setting is a lot quieter than an unstable gas exploding."

"That's...not a bad idea," Bentley allowed. "I didn't know your stun cannon had an 'armor pierce' setting."

"That's because none of you wear armor," Carmelita shot back teasingly.

"But...won't it look bad for you to be actively helping us with a heist?" Murray asked worriedly.

"That's not a concern right now," Carmelita responded flatly.

The room fell completely silent. Eventually, it was Sly who spoke up. "What do you mean?"

"Despite Coco's efforts getting my name cleared, it's highly unlikely I'll ever be able to wipe this whole incident from my record," she responded softly. "The investigation will go deep...and likely will uncover our relationship, Sly. Even if Neyla's interpretation is completely disproved...that emotional connection will mark me as being compromised where the Cooper Gang is concerned. If that's the case...I'm finished at Interpol." She managed a smile as Sly's hand found hers. "I accepted that from the moment the Contessa locked me up. I just had to look at my priorities...and taking care of Coco is the highest priority for me.

"And if I'm no longer a member of Interpol...then the most efficient - and most pleasant - way to do that is to become an official and permanent member of your Gang."

Bentley's eyes looked like they were going to pop out of his sockets. Murray actually fell over in shock. Coco didn't know whether to cheer or commiserate.

Sly put his arm around Carmelita, pulling her into a hug. He made sure to position himself so the others couldn't see her tears.

The Iron Pony

It took a while after that statement of Mom's before any of us were ready to initiate the plan. Once we were all more stable emotionally, Mom made her move.

With a little help from Dad, she made her way up to a point where she could see all three trains as they followed their tracks, Dad went down to get ready to do his part, while Uncle Bentley and I went to do ours. From what the schematics showed, none of the Clockwerk Parts were firmly affixed to the engines, and could easily be removed with limited technical skills. As such, we would be moving fast and hard, with the three of us each raiding one train.

"Is everybody in position?" Murray asked through the Binoc-U-coms.

"I'm ready to fire," Carmelita spoke calmly through hers, the click of her weapon carrying over the signal.

"I'm in position for Iron Horse One," Bentley called out. "Coco, you sure you can handle the RC chopper for the defenses on Iron Horse 2?"

"I'm no slouch at video games, Uncle Bentley," Coco responded confidently. "I may not be as good as you, but I can handle it."

"And I'm already on Iron Horse 3," Sly chimed in. "Security's rather lax since we haven't done anything yet, and I was able to get aboard rather easily starting from out of town. The train will be coming into town soon."

"Then it's time to begin," Carmelita spoke up. "I have the trains in my sights...now!"

Three shots rang out. Three roof hatches popped open as their locks were destroyed.

"Damn!" Sly murmured in amazement. "Nice shoo-"

"Language!" Carmelita snapped out. "Coco's on the line!"

"Sorry!" Sly responded quickly as Coco giggled and Bentley and Murray chuckled. "Though one question. How come you were able to shoot those so accurately, yet could never manage to hit me?"

"For one, you didn't move in a predictable pattern," Carmelita sniped back. "For another...I never actually wanted to hit you for real. ...guess Neyla was-"

"Mom, don't!" Coco snapped out. "Don't let her get inside your head."

"You did what you did for Coco," Murray added. "There was never anything wrong in that."

"And despite what Neyla made it look like, you never violated any regulations or ethics codes," Bentley added. "Believe me, I checked."

"...thanks, all of you," Carmelita offered softly. "I'll...I'll just have to try and believe that..."

Coco looked up as she heard explosions along the train. "Gotta go! The anti-air security kicked in!" Breaking the connection, she activated the RC chopper.

The two screens on the controller were linked to the front and bottom cameras of the RC chopper, allowing Coco to maneuver carefully as long as she maintained altitude. She moved the chopper slowly along the length of the train, using the destructive bombs to break the rocket launchers, sleep bombs to knock the guards out, and the cannon on the front to take out the drones the train released.

Once the defenses were all destroyed, she climbed up to the top of the caboose and dropped down the open hatch. The interior of the first car was a straight path with only a few moose guards Coco was able to put to sleep with her needles. The second car had some fast moving security lasers and spotlights that she evaded with carefully timed jumps. The third car was sealed, and she had to climb up to the roof to cross. The guards were still asleep from the sleep bombs, so she crossed carefully to avoid waking them.

The fifth car was a flatbed open to the air, with two moose guards patrolling it. Coco used a carefully thrown needle to embed some twined threads in the far car and the one she was on, then crossed the makeshift tightrope before pulling it back in at the other end. The strong winds of passage kept it from trailing down to the car in the middle, so the guards didn't even notice. She then dropped into the sixth car, using quick hops to evade the fast moving security lasers on the floor.

The seventh and eighth cars each had three moose guards patrolling, with various bottles scattered around as sound traps. Coco decided to avoid both cars, using her cane to pull herself onto the roof and race across to the engine block. There, she retrieved one of the Clockwerk lungs. "Got it!" she called out through the Binoc-U-coms. "One lung retrieved! And the train's starting to slow down!"

"Then get off!" Sly responded immediately. "I've got the stomach."

"And I've got the other lung!" Bentley called out. "We'll meet back at the hideout to plan our next move!"

Smiling, Coco waited until the terrain outside the train was moving slowly enough before leaping out the window and into a snowdrift. Shaking herself off, she made her way back to the hideout.

Jean Bison threw such a fit when he found all three parts missing and all three trains down at once. It was so funny! I'm glad it got Mom to laugh, too. She seemed...really down about her decision to join the Gang permanently.

When I asked her about it, she tried to say I was wrong, that she couldn't be happier...but we all saw right through that. And I didn't blame her. Interpol had been Mom's entire life, her career, her family legacy, her dream, before meeting me and Dad and Uncle Murray and Uncle Bentley. Things had changed, but law enforcement was still a big part of her. She hated that she was 'abandoning' all that, but she couldn't admit to being upset with her decision for fear of making me think she resented me. I knew better than that, of course, but grown ups always seem to think kids don't really 'get' grown up thinking. Maybe most kids wouldn't, but thief training had given me a bit of insight into that.

...besides, Mozzie covered any of that in my sessions with him back when we first beat Clockwerk.

The Northern Lights

When Jean Bison withdrew to the north, we followed him. While we lost the trail at first, it wasn't long before we saw a couple clues to his whereabouts. First, the Northern Lights were acting very strange. One night they'd be bright as day, the next they'd be gone completely...which is really odd since they'd been a steady glow until we'd chased Bison further north. Considering the talk about a 'Northern Lights Battery', we were pretty certain that had something to do with it.

The second clue we found was surprisingly unsettling to me. An entire forest had been harvested, from the looks of things practically overnight, to make room for a logging camp churning out massive amounts of lumber. The sight of so much natural beauty destroyed so callously...it made me physically nauseous. I was able to push past it long enough to find the Vault, though. Inside, there was an upgrade for the electrified strike of our canes that would let us sustain the electric field longer for a spin attack.

Dad told me Bison was able to cause so much damage because of the Clockwerk Talons. We had to get them away from him. However, we couldn't go too fast. Arpeggio was on the way to pick up the Battery, and he had the Clockwerk Brain. The only way we'd be able to get access to the Brain was if we could get onto the blimp.

While I was hitting the Vault, Dad took some recon photos, and came back with a great deal of interesting news. Not only was the Battery we were interested in already gone from the charging station, but Jean Bison was posting the Clockwerk Talons as the prize for the Lumberjack Games as a way of bringing in more competition. If we won the competition, we'd get the Talons! ...well, as long as we were able to give Bison reason to play by his word.

And between what I saw of the charging station and what we know of Bison, I had a couple ideas...

The prep work for the games didn't take long. I was sent to retrieve a frozen tome on log cutting for research, since I was able to use my Flame Fu to melt the ice without damaging the book. Dad took care of bugging Bison's office, and Uncle Murray infiltrated a guard barracks competition to gather information.

With that, we were ready for the games.

Bentley laid out the plan he'd come up with. "Alright, after reading that log chopping guide, I've come up with a plan to win...that hinges on Coco's magic."

"Eh?" everyone gasped in shock.

"I analyzed the way Coco's magic allows her to climb up trees," Bentley explained. "It syncs her magic with that of the tree, allowing a magical interchange. However, in the case of a dead tree - or a log - doing so would drain magic out of the dead wood and into her, rendering the log brittle and easily broken. If she takes the drained energy and puts it into a strike, she should be able to split a thick log in a single strike."

"That ought to put her faster than Bison," Carmelita observed. "Since they're a prize, he can't use the Talons in the games...right?"

"We can assume so," Bentley agreed. "Of course, if that's not the case, he'll probably go easy not expecting much from someone so young."

"And that will give me a chance to talk with him," Coco added. "What are the other games?"

"Ice wall climbing and log rolling," Bentley continued. "For the former, I've managed to modify your cane so you can split it into four climbing hooks you can grip in each of your hooves...somehow. I'm still not sure how you're able to hold things in your hooves."

"...magic?" Murray suggested helpfully.

"I prefer to understand the mechanics of it," Bentley pointed out firmly. "I can't really improve on what I don't understand. Anyway, with the four hooks, you should be able to run right up the ice wall. As for log rolling...well, there's only so much that can be done there..."

"Actually, she should be naturally advantaged there," Carmelita pointed out. "For a log to be big enough for Jean Bison to balance on, Coco could stand on it with all four legs spread. That means she'll be able to run normally while it spins...and with her incredibly low center of gravity, she has excellent balance."

"So it's all on me, then?" Coco asked curiously. "I...I think I can do it..."

"I don't like the idea of leaving it all to her alone," Sly pointed out worriedly. "What if Bison is a sore loser? Or he has someone try to sabotage her?"

"Unfortunately, any attempts on our part to cheat will just anger Bison, even if he can't prove it," Bentley pointed out. "Coco seems to think she can get through to Bison, get him to help us. Only chance we'll have to do that is if he keeps his temper."

"Meaning have him be confronted by a little kid trying to be a grown up, only to show immense natural talent?" Murray asked.

"I guess that's something I'm good at," Coco murmured softly. "Be absolutely adorable right up until I steal everything that isn't nailed down."

Carmelita took a slow breath, then let it out. "Yes...you are," she muttered. "You are very good at that...especially when what you're stealing is a march."

"Can't I steal an April instead?" Coco asked with a playful pout. Reaching into her bags, she pulled out a metal helm with a face mask, both covered with downward curving spines. "I'll even look the part!"

Everyone but Bentley found that hilarious.

The Lumberjack Games

While I didn't like the idea of games that glorified the destruction of nature, I did understand the necessity of going through with the mission. I also knew I needed to get through to Jean Bison, which meant finding a way to appeal to him on his own ground. As such, I made sure to dress the part...

Coco had chosen her outfit carefully. A red flannel shirt and blue coveralls gave the basis to the appearance, but a jaunty cap was an absolute necessity. She'd also placed a fake ax head over the top of her cane to finish off the look. With a smile, she marched straight down to where Jean Bison was holding the Lumberjack Games. She knew exactly how she wanted to approach this. "Excuse me, mister Bison!" she called out happily as she approached him, immediately catching his attention. "I heard there were games here! Can I play, too?"

As she expected, Jean Bison took one look at her and burst into laughter. "These are no games fer little kids, squirt! Go home before ya get yerself hurt, or catch a chill! These are man's games, only for real lumberjacks!"

Coco gave her most adorable pout. "Aww...come on! I'm as tough as any boy, and I can jack lumber with the best of them!" As he laughed, she decided to throw in another tease. "Besides, the cold never bothered me anyway."

"Huh?" Jean Bison asked as several of the birds acting as judges chuckled. "Well, normally I wouldn't let a girl young as you even try these games...but I like yer spunk. Tell ya what, show me what you can do with that ax in the Power Log Chop, and if it's any good ya can play in the other games. How's that sound?"

Coco grinned widely. "Thank you, Mr. Bison!"

It didn't take long to get set up for the Power Log Chop. Coco was presented with a massive log segment that was even bigger than she was. "Whenever you're ready!" Jean chuckled as he stepped back to watch.

Closing her eyes, Coco placed her hoof against the segment of log. As Bentley had predicted, she could feel the magic left in the wood that gave it its strength. With careful focus, she was able to draw that magic out of the log right along the center ring, weakening the log right in the middle. Feeling all that magic in her, she pushed it into her cane. With a loud cry, she brought the cane down, hitting just the right spot.

Jean's lower jaw dropped as the log was split in a single swing. "...how?" he gasped out in shock as the duck judges showed perfect 10 scores.

Coco grinned widely. "Told you I was good!" she offered cheekily.

Jean managed a chuckle as he stepped up to his own log. "Well, we'll see how I stack up against you." Lifting his ax, he focused his energy and sent several powerful blows to the log, splitting it perfectly without damaging it at all. "I may not be as fast as you, but speed isn't part of this game," he explained as the ducks held up perfect 10s. "But you've shown talent and spunk, so let's see how you do on the ice wall."

The ice wall had hooks scattered along it to climb up by, though a few had metal panels under them that were occasionally electrified. Splitting her cane into the four hooks, Coco leapt onto the wall as soon as the timer was started, running straight up to the top in a surprisingly short amount of time. "Up here, Mr. Bison!" she called out eagerly. "Betcha can't beat my time!"

Grinning from ear to ear, Jean Bison leapt onto the wall, dragging himself up it by sheer brute force until he pulled himself over the top after Coco. "Kid, you've got spunk. I like it! Reminds me of me when I was your age! In fact, I wasn't much older than you when I cut down my first tree. Pa was so proud o' me..." He sighed nostalgically. "...course, he was less proud when he saw what the attempt had done to his best ax. I couldn't sit down for a week."

Coco immediately covered her rump with a whimper.

Jean burst into laughter. "No fear of that here, kid! Now let's see how you do on the log roll. Now, normally we'd be rather far apart to avoid interfering with each other...but I'm gonna put 'em closer together, so I can pull you out of the water when you fall off. Wouldn't want you catching a chill, no matter how tough you are."

Coco grinned cheekily. "I'll be sure to pull you out when you fall in!" Coco challenged.

"That's the spirit!" Jean burst out eagerly. "But just so ya know...I ain't never lost this event either before or after my time in the deep freeze!"

As Bentley had stated, the logs being rolled in the water were large enough that Coco could stand on one completely, so as long as she kept running in the right direction it was next to impossible for her to fall off. The only real obstacle was the logs occasionally dropping into the water from under her. As the pair maintained balance on the logs, Coco decided it was time to try and get through to Bison, hoping she'd earned enough good will to get answers without sparking his temper. "You know...I didn't originally come down here for the games," she spoke up.

"Oh?" Jean asked curiously. "For an afterthought, ya done real good in 'em."

"Mommy and Daddy were worried about the Lights," Coco explained. "They were going bright, then vanishing, then bright...they aren't supposed to do that."

"Yeah, that's the Northern Light collector," Jean explained. "When I have it set to normal draw, the Lights only dim slightly without detracting from their show. But Arpeggio wanted that extra battery now, so I had to turn it up to max. That's why the Lights went wonky from drawing too much energy all at once from them. Ya gotta be careful usin' that Injun magic these days."

"So...it doesn't hurt the Lights to draw power from them?" Coco clarified.

"Nope!" Jean proclaimed proudly. "I always loved those Lights in the sky, and it was a real treat for me to build a way to use those old Injun tricks I picked up, good ol' Settler know-how, and these newfangled machines to find a way to turn 'em into power. At the low setting it gets...the bird said something like 13 billion megawatt/hours a day, whatever that means."

Coco nearly fell off her log in shock. "That...that's more electricity than the entire continent uses in a day!"

"Yeah, that's what Arpeggio said," Jean confirmed. "No idea what that means, though. Is this eckltricity really all that important?"

"Jean...the biggest crisis facing the world right now is the energy crisis," she explained. "The world is running out of natural resources that can be used to power everything the world needs to make it all function. Billions of dollars are funneled into a desperate search for new - for renewable sources of energy. If you made your Northern Lights collector public and patented it, you'd have more money than you could dream of!"

Jean stared in amazement. "Really that important?" he asked in surprise. "But...but all I really care about is keeping my trains running-"

"Switch them to electric!" Coco called out. "You could run the power from the collector straight along the rails, and the trains wouldn't even need an engine to run endlessly, never needing to stop except to load and unload!"

Jean promptly fell off his log and into the water. Coco quickly leapt to shore and pulled him out of the water. He hardly seemed to notice. "Run my trains...off the Lights? Eternally?" He stared up at the lighthouse where the power was collected in wonder. "But...but why wouldn't Arpeggio tell me I could do that?"

"You mean, why wouldn't he tell you how you could achieve your dreams without being dependent on him?" Coco asked carefully. "Why wouldn't he give you the only information that would let you break free of him instead of doing all his spice shipments for free?"

Jean's eyes widened in realization, then narrowed in fury. "Why that low down, no good, dirty rotten crook!" he roared out, slamming his staff - Talons and all - into the ice and snow. "What I wouldn't give right now for a way to really stick it to him!"

Coco grinned softly. "I might just be able to help you with that..." she offered carefully.

The Hidden Trap

As I headed back to meet everyone at the hideout with the Clockwerk Talons, I thought we had it all in the bag. The plan I'd set in motion with Jean Bison would get us aboard Arpeggio's blimp with none the wiser, and we'd be able to put a stop to the assembling of Clockwerk without any further trouble. I couldn't have been more wrong.

When I reached the hideout, I found everyone else facing someone we'd have much preferred to have never heard from again...

As Coco reached the hideout with the Clockwerk Talons in her bag, what she saw froze her to her spot and put her in a battle stance. Sly, Carmelita, Bentley, and Murray were facing off against Neyla, who stood a good distance away with a smug look on her face. "You..." Coco growled as she moved to stand with the others.

"Oh, and now the family of criminals is all together," Neyla cooed playfully.

"You're one to talk!" Carmelita growled out as she gripped her pistol tight.

"Oh I know," Neyla countered in an almost seductive purr. Her predatory gaze locked on Coco. "And if not for your actions, everyone would still be ignorant of it, and I'd be right where I'm supposed to be at the head of Interpol's criminal investigation division. But no, you couldn't just play to the script, could you? Everything would have been so much easier if you'd just been a good girl and let the grownups take care of things, but your little stunt with the golems and the Contessa's confession put me on the run!"

"Good!" Coco snapped back angrily. "If anyone deserves to suffer, it's you. After what you've done-"

"Oh shut up!" Neyla interrupted derisively. "You're just a little girl playing in a game much too big for you. Actions like yours have consequences, little pony, and yours are about to come home to roost." Without warning, she lashed out with her whip.

Before anyone could blink, Murray was between her and Coco, the lashing end of the whip clutched in one closed fist. "You don't get to hurt Coco," he growled out, his deep voice booming with rage. "Not on my watch."

"And just what do you think you can do?" Neyla taunted, twirling her end of the whip. "You don't have the turtle's brains, to outsmart me. You don't have the fox's weapons to take me down. You don't have the raccoon's skills to keep up with me. And you don't have your little pony's magic to change the rules of the game. You're just the dumb muscle. Why don't you get back behind the wheel until the ones with the brains tell you who to punch."

"I don't need to be told who to punch!" Murray roared out, lunging forward. Neyla's eyes widened in shock as she leapt back, barely avoiding the first punch which powdered the stone outcropping she'd been standing on, only to be jerked back by her grip on her whip towards a second devastating punch she barely dodged by pulling herself over it. Releasing her whip, she bounced off Murray's head as she leapt to a safe distance.

"What did I tell you?" Neyla taunted, putting her hand on her hips in an almost seductive pose. "Just...dumb...muscle."

"I'll fucking kill you, bitch!" Murray roared out, his eyes almost glowing red as he lunged for Neyla, only for her to leap away again. "I'll rip you apart! I'll..." As he almost managed to grab her, his breathing started to get heavy. "I'll...I'll..." He suddenly let out a pained groan as he clutched at his belly.

"Murray!" Bentley and Sly both gasped out in fear as they rushed to his side.

"He's burning up!" Bentley gasped out as he checked his vitals. "And his heart rate's skyrocketed. It's nearly three times the healthy maximum."

"What did you do to him?" Carmelita roared out as she leveled her pistol at Neyla.

Neyla simply smirked. "What I said about consequences. Everyone at the prison was fed specially altered spice with their food, to make them more susceptible to Contessa's hypnosis. It also enhanced aggression, as I'm sure you know. However, there's something rather unique about that side of the spice. It stays in the system until activated, one way or the other. If it's activated - by hypnosis or rage - soon enough after consumption, it washes out of the system harmlessly. But if it builds up too long, as long as it has for Murray...it puts the systems into overdrive. If the counteragent isn't introduced over the next few hours...he'll burn himself out." Coco's eyes widened in fear, and she rushed to Murray's side, desperate to try and help him.

"You wouldn't have goaded him into this if you didn't have the counteragent," Carmelita stated flatly. "You're too motivated by self interest to be that suicidal."

"Quite correct," Neyla purred. "And I'm willing to provide it...in exchange for all your Clockwerk parts. Both lungs, the stomach, the half of the heart, and the talons."

Sly, Bentley, and Carmelita exchanged worried glances.

"Sly..." Murray gasped out. "D-don't...it's too dangerous..."

"...we can always steal them back," Sly stated firmly. "But you can't be replaced." Receiving confirming nods from the others, he turned to Neyla. "Deal."

Smirking, Neyla handed over an IV bag. "Hook him up to this. It's already set up to give it to him at exactly the right rate, and you'll see effect in the first ten minutes. Of course, interrupting the treatment is instantly lethal...and Carmelita's not the only one with a pistol. If I don't have the parts - and I mean all of them - in fifteen minutes, I'll splatter the bag, and you'll never find or produce another sample in time."

We had no choice. We stuck to the deal, and Neyla got away with the remaining parts. Admittedly it wasn't as bad as it could have been, since we were heading to Arpeggio's base next where the parts were going in the first place...but the blow to morale was enormous. Murray remained in a deep funk as we waited for Jean to come tell us everything was ready, blaming himself for Arpeggio even having a chance to assemble Clockwerk.

My focus, however, was on Neyla. She'd taken my family, and then she'd used my Uncle as a bargaining chip. I would never forgive her...

The Cruel Fate

Coco clung tightly to her cane, unsure if it was because she thought it could protect her somehow or because she feared to lose it. Then again, even if the cane couldn't protect her from Clock-La, she refused to be helpless before Seft like the last time. She had been trained, taught, groomed into a worthy heir to the Cooper line, and an effective cop to boot, not to mention her skill with her magic. She would not wilt like some helpless damsel or terrified infant!

"You don't seem to be screaming anymore," Clock-La spoke up cruelly as she flapped her way around the floating station. "Out of breath?"

"Not giving you the satisfaction!" Coco snapped back.

Clock-La laughed pitilessly. "You actually think you'll come out of this somehow? That you'll somehow beat Seft? You are foolish, a child playing grown up games. I look forward to your screams when Seft hooks you up to his machine."

"You won't get that far," Coco insisted firmly.

"You think your family can save you?" Clock-La taunted. "It won't be long before we're over Paris. While two batteries would have accelerated the effects of the hypnotic light show, one will suffice! And once I've absorbed that, I will truly be unstoppable!"

"Clockwerk thought he was unstoppable, too," Coco pointed out flatly. "Look what that got him."

"And what do you think your family can do to save you from there?" Clock-La demanded cruelly. "The blimps are too slow to catch me, and the station too cumbersome. How do you expect them to reach me, build a giant catapult and launch themselves at me-"

The sound of creaking timbers, a woosh of metal through the air, and Bentley's terrified screams caused both of them to turn their attention towards the station just as Bentley slammed into the center of Clock-La's back and Sly floated down lightly with his glider. "Sly, you try and free Coco! I'll hack the Clockwerk parts and see if I can steer Clock-La close enough to the station to pick up Murray and Carmelita!"

"You think you can take control of my body from me?" Clock-La demanded angrily as Sly raced down to the talons to try and free Coco. "And how do you expect to do that?"

"A crazy gamble!" Bentely countered as he plugged his computer into the parts, surprised to actually find an outlet for data uplink there. Once plugged in, he rapidly typed a message before sending. The message was simple.

If you do nothing, Seft bests the Cooper's in your place.

"And what is that supposed to-WHA?" Clock-La's voice changed from disdainful to shocked as her body suddenly swerved towards the station, flying under it slowly enough for Murray and Carmelita to leap onto it.

"Got her!" Sly called out as the talons jerked open, catching Coco's cane by the loop in his own and swinging her up to the other talon so she could grasp the leg. "You steady, Coco?" he asked worriedly.

"I'm good!" Coco called out. She proceeded to climb up onto Clock-La's back. "Let's ground this bird!"

The group went to work. Between Murray's fists, Carmelita's gunshots, Bentley's bombs, Coco's Flame Fu strikes, and Sly's cane strikes, it wasn't long before Clock-La could no longer maintain altitude, and she fell towards the ground at the edge of the sea, her metal body absorbing most of the impact for the Gang as they jumped off just before impact. Clock-La, however, plainly wasn't about to give up. "I may not have pure hate to make me immortal, but I will not fail here! Already my body repairs itself! Already I climb for the skies again, the reaper seeking her quarry!" Lasers erupted from the fallen metal body, creating an ever shifting deadly net.

"What does it take to make this thing stay down?" Sly demanded angrily as the group hid behind a rocky outcrop.

"Jean Bison mentioned Arpeggio talking about a 'Hate Chip' when he took the Clockwerk Brain!" Bentley spoke up quickly. "If we can pry the beak open, I should be able to locate the Hate Chip and remove it. That should stop Clock-La from attacking!"

"Leave that to me!" Murray proclaimed as he leapt over the outcrop.

Despite her objections, Sly and Carmelita held Coco down behind the outcrop so she couldn't see what was happening. All she could hear was Clock-La's enraged cries, Murray's shout for Bentley to come get the Chip...and then Bentley's sudden pained cry.

"Bentley!" all three shouted out as they leapt to rush to the turtle's aid, the lasers having shut off...and the beak slammed shut.

As they managed to manhandle the beak open, Bentley looked up weakly, the large chip clutched in his hands. "I...I can't feel my legs..." he whimpered out softly.

Tears in his eyes, Murray scooped Bentley up and carried him back. Sly moved to do the same to Coco...only to pull back as a dark aura suddenly surrounded her as she turned towards Clock-La. "Coco..." he called out warningly.

Coco didn't hear. All she could hear were the voices of her own rage. Clock-La had torn her family apart, sought to steal her very essence...and now had broken her Uncle. Mercy was no longer an option. "So you want to be immortal?" she growled out, her voice barely above a whisper and yet shockingly loud in the suddenly silent world.

"I will get the Chip back..." Clock-La growled out. "I will be immortal...indestructible..."

"Yes...you will," Coco responded, her voice dead. Lunging in, she slammed her hooves against the metal bird skull, and all the death magic gathered in her aura discharged into it, separating it from the rest of the body as the parts fell every which way. "I have taken from you the capacity to die," she stated flatly. "No matter how time weathers you, how the world tears at you, how great your pains...you will never shuffle off this mortal coil."

Clock-La's eyes glowed for a moment eagerly, but that light soon turned to fear as the skull started to roll towards the edge of the bluff they had been fighting on. "Wait! Why would you do that for me?"

"To you," Coco said softly. "Enjoy your immortality in your watery tomb." Spinning, she delivered a double hind leg kick, sending the head flying off. "Your immortal life force will weigh the skull down, and drag you into the depths!"

Bentley stared, stunned, as he mentally calculated where the skull splashed down as he took in their surroundings. "That's...that's in the middle of an ocean trench..." he murmured softly. "I...I'm not sure which one..."

"One of the deepest parts of the ocean," Coco stated softly, "where she will stay for eternity in darkness and cold and crushing pressure that will never allow her to sleep, in a body that will never die no matter how rotten or decayed or crushed it becomes."

"Don't...don't you think that's a little harsh?" Carmelita asked softly.

Coco glanced from Carmelita to Sly, to Murray, and finally to Bentley. "No," she replied finally. "I just gave her what she wanted..." Saying nothing more, she curled up to Bentley with tears pouring down her cheeks.

Miss Ruby taught me those spells of necromatic power, of darkest magic, so I would know them and could protect myself from them, on the assumption that someone like Clockwerk might rise again to fight us. The shame of having used them like that...I will carry that with me for the rest of my life.

And yet...I can't bring myself to regret it. That will keep me awake nights forever...

The Cleanup

Sly, Carmelita, and Murray stood there, staring as Coco slipped into unconsciousness, plainly spent. Carmelita was the first one to speak. "So...what now?" she asked Sly calmly.

Sly frowned as he stared off into the distance as he mulled it over in his mind. After a time, he came to a decision. "Now you arrest me," he stated simply.

"What?" Carmelita, Murray, and Bentley all shouted out in shock.

"Look at us," he continued sharply. "Murray, you're still recovering from the spice overdose. Bentley, you can't walk anymore. We have no escape vehicle. We have no allies to help us anywhere near here. Interpol will likely be here any minute now, and there's no way we can make a getaway. The only way we can protect Coco now - especially with Seft active again - is if I end up in jail in one piece." He turned to Carmelita. "So I'll surrender to you, you'll arrest me, and take me all the way back to jail. That will wipe away any suspicion that you might have been working with me from the start, and get you reinstated. You'll then be able to keep an eye out for Seft's exploits on that side of the law, while our friends on the other side can keep their ears to the ground."

Carmelita frowned, her eyes conflicted. "I...I don't like this," she murmured softly. "I...don't like the idea of throwing you in jail." Now confronted with the real fact of having to lock Sly up...she found she no longer wanted to. It betrayed everything she'd stood for as an Interpol Inspector...and yet here was Sly, willing to give up his freedom for the sake of their daughter, and to give Carmelita back her life. "I..."

Stepping forward, Sly gently pressed his lips to Carmelita's, silencing her. "We have to do this," he said softly as he stepped back. "For Coco." Handing his cane off to Murray, he held out his hands.

Knowing she could do nothing else, Carmelita regretfully pulled out her handcuffs and clapped them around Sly's wrists. "...Murray, Muggshot and Miss Ruby's sentences should be up soon," she spoke up. "With everything that happened with Coco's golems and the Contessa, they'll probably be released on their own cognizance, completely rehabilitated. When that happens, you should consider dropping Coco off with them, if a more permanent option hasn't arisen."

Murray nodded as he scooped Bentley and Coco up, shifting all their gear into a bag. "I'll...I'll see you," he offered softly, turning to walk slowly away with his double burden.

As Sly and Carmelita were left alone on the bluff for a time, they turned back to each other. "You're...you're sure there's no other way?" she asked worriedly.

Sly nodded sadly. "It has to be this way. Don't worry, we'll make things work somehow." He offered a soft smile. "Maybe I can cut a deal to get out early as a CI?" he suggested comfortingly.

Carmelita managed a chuckle, but the sound of wings put them on alert. Carmelita spun, her expression professional...only for her eyes to widen in shock. "...Megraw..." she whispered worriedly.

The golden eagle that flapped down to land near the pair wore the uniform of an Interpol officer, but his decorations plainly showed him to be of incredibly high rank. He landed on point, his talons digging into the ground as his wings folded, feathers curling in as he freed his hands to stare down at the pair. "Ach, lass!" he greeted coldly. "Ah knew this'd be where ya'd come down from that sky fight, so ah come ahead o' the rest ta see if'n that metal burd be tough enough ta still be kickin'. Now what's all this then?" His fierce, golden gaze swept between Carmelita and Sly.

Carmelita saluted almost instinctively. "Secretary Megraw, the suspected Master Thief Sly Cooper has surrendered into my custody, sir!"

Sly blanched as he heard the title. While he didn't know the name, this was a member of Interpol's General Secretariat, the governing body. This was one of the people who made the decisions about how Interpol policy was shaped and carried out.

"Ach, ah ain't no Secretary just now!" Megraw countered. "Never lahked that title. Makes me sund lahk some busybody in a skirt fetchin' coffee! When the kerfuffle 'boot that Contessa reached us, we decided someone had ta come in and clean house! That be me." He glanced back and forth between the pair. "So...that's yer story, then? The supposed Master Thief surrendered to ya...just like that?"

"In exchange for letting my injured friends leave unmolested to seek treatment," Sly spoke up quickly, wincing internally as he saw how stiff Carmelita got at his statement.

Megraw glanced between the pair again for a time, before a smirk crossed his wickedly curved beak. "Ach, if that's yer story, then ya better stick to it, ya ken? That'll get ya back on the force wit yer name cleared, Miss Fox, no matter how the trial goes!"

Trial? Sly thought in surprise. But aren't I-

"Ya just me be makin' sure this idjit keeps his mouth shut till he gets a lawyer," Megraw insisted. "Dun want no legal loophole 'bout 'rights violations' gettin' anythang he says thrown out!"

"Yes sir!" Carmelita confirmed, saluting again.

As a chopper flew in, followed by several police cars, Megraw nodded firmly. "Escort tha prisoner...Inspector Fox!"

The Trial

As Sly sat in the courtroom waiting for the judge to arrive, he glanced over to where the lawyer he'd been assigned was sitting. He almost couldn't believe his luck. Sitting next to him was a defense attorney who was famous world wide for having never failed a case, despite having been a lawyer for several centuries...a phoenix by the name of Porcupine. When asked why he went by such a name, he would only ever say it was an obscure joke before changing the subject.

As the judge arrived, Sly straightened, ready to face justice. Even with this lawyer on his side...he knew he'd done the crimes. He knew that everyone knew it. And he knew that Carmelita - who knew intimate details of the Gang's workings - would be called as the star witness, the one who'd captured him. It was bound to be a lock up of a case.

Elsewhere in the courtroom, Carmelita was also waiting to be called, looking rather sick to her stomach. To keep her daughter safe, she would have to do everything in her power to throw Sly in jail...despite the fact that she wanted more than anything to fail. Still, she would do her duty. She was a cop. She would just have to find a way to learn to live with it...

At long last, Carmelita took the stand, answering questions for the prosecution as she delineated every time she'd seen Sly at the scenes of crimes, every theft laid at his doorstep, and every calling card she'd ever found. She could see in the judge's face that this was going to be more than enough evidence to throw Sly in jail, possibly for life given how many grand thefts it totaled. Unless that Porcupine had a masterful strategy, Sly was doomed.

"Cross examination?" the judge asked, turning towards Porcupine...who up until now hadn't asked a single question of any witness.

Smiling, Porcupine stood up and walked up to in front of the witness stand, his ancient gaze taking Carmelita in in her entirety, seeming to gaze right into her soul. "Inspector Carmelita Fox," he asked calmly, "how much do you know of Sly Cooper outside of your hunting of him?"

Carmelita blinked in surprise. She hadn't expected this sort of questioning. "A...good amount," she allowed. "I'm not sure how to quantify it."

"Do you know the events that led him to become an orphan?" Porcupine asked flatly.

There was a stir throughout the courtroom. That tidbit of information hadn't been brought up as of yet. "I do," Carmelita confirmed.

"Elucidate," Porcupine instructed.

"The criminal known as Clockwerk had long hated Sly's family," Carmelita explained. "Somewhere in excess of several centuries. He finally tracked down Sly's father...and killed and devoured him." Carmelita heard someone in the vast chamber struggling not to vomit. "It is my understanding that Sly was hiding in a nearby closet as this was happening...and witnessed it through the door crack and keyhole."

"Then, it would be understandable that Sly might dedicate himself in taking down this Clockwerk, who was wanted dead or alive with a bounty in excess of twenty million American dollars on his head," Porcupine observed to no one in particular. "This would explain his fierce battle against Clockwerk himself, which you were both a witness and participant in, and his pursuit of recovering his still functional parts from the Klaww Gang, another gang of criminals...another sequence of events you were witness to and, in the later stages, a participant of."

Carmelita lowered her gaze, afraid this was going to get her indicted right alongside Sly. That wouldn't be good for Coco.

"Aside from the thefts of the Clockwerk parts - which evidence indicates you encouraged as part of an Interpol operation to prevent his resurrection and - failing that - take him down permanently, did you actually witness Sly or anyone in his gang perform any actual thefts?" Porcupine asked sharply.

Carmelita jerked her head up in surprise, as did the judge. She hadn't thought her involvement in the Klaww Gang incidents could be classified as a long running undercover op utilizing criminal resources. That placed all Sly's 'crimes' during the hunt for the parts firmly in the grey area of 'legal if not strictly ethical'. Returning to the actual question, Carmelita responded, "...no sir, I never actually saw him or any associate of his steal anything but the Clockwerk parts."

"Has any security camera ever captured Sly or any member of his gang in the act of theft?" Porcupine continued.

"...no, they have not," Carmelita confirmed.

"Has any eye witness come forth to finger Sly or his 'gang' for a theft?"

"...no, they have not," Carmelita murmured, her voice awed as she suddenly saw where this was going.

"Then on what evidence was Sly and his associates fingered as responsible for so many thefts?" Porcupine inquired diffidently.

"The...raccoon mask calling cards," Carmelita explained. "Many of which were found in Sly's possession."

"This is true," Porcupine allowed. "However, I submit defense exhibits A through G, being a supply of such masks in my possession, your possession, and the possession of the Honorable Judges five children respectively." He smirked softly. "The furor around the so-called 'Cooper heists' made for much interest across the world, and duplicates of said 'calling cards' are available in any collector's shop. Surely you wouldn't accuse the Judge's children of these crimes for owning the masks?"

"N-no sir," Carmelita insisted firmly. "However, I also saw Sly and his associates at the various locations the thefts occurred in."

"You were there," Porcupine pointed out. "Should we accuse you?"

Carmelita said nothing in response.

"Let us instead turn to one area of evidence considered above reproach," Porcupine continued. "Inspector Fox...is there any forensic evidence at any of the crime scenes connected to the so called 'Cooper Gang' that connects them to the thefts?"

"...no," Carmelita finally allowed. Of course there wouldn't be, she thought silently. Sly told me himself the first Cooper family technique he learned was one to ensure he never left any of his 'essence' - that very forensic evidence - behind, and he probably taught Murray and Bentley.

Porcupine turned to look the judge in the eye. "While I in no way impugn Inspector Fox's skills as an Interpol Officer nor imply that her arrest of my client was in any way a bad arrest, the fact of the matter is that there is not enough evidence to implicate my client's guilt in any of the cases being addressed this day, save those where he was working alongside Interpol to take down a creature far worse than even what he was made out to be. As such, I hereby move for a summary dismissal of all charges."

The judge stared at Porcupine for a time, then turned to where the prosecuting attorney was hanging his head, plainly at a complete loss. "...motion granted," the judge allowed, banging his gavel. "Next case."

Sly stared in shock as Porcupine walked back to his side. "And now you know why I told you not to enter a plea," he whispered before making his way out of the court.

What Came After

To say that I was relieved to learn that Dad wasn't going to jail was to say Genghis Khan dabbled in real estate. It was the best news I'd ever heard. Uncle Murray and Uncle Bentley were also relieved...but they had their own news.

The events of Clock-La had...wounded us all. Uncle Murray intended to travel the world, trying to find some peace with himself. Bentley intended to further his technical research until his paralysis was no longer an issue...whether because it was fixed or it no longer hindered him. Our family was...going its separate ways for now.

I was okay with this. Really, I was. I saw them off with a smile and a wish of good luck. ...okay, I bawled my eyes out like a baby begging them not to go and clinging to them desperately while Dad acted mature about it. Get off my back, I was eight! Eventually I ran out of tears, gave them a last farewell hug...and pouted like a spoiled brat as soon as they were out of sight. I admit it was selfish of me, but like I said, eight!

A couple of interesting things came out of everything that happened, though. My recommendations to Dimitri actually led him to branching out into all sorts of arts, including music. He actually wrote a song dedicated to me. At first, I was flattered...but then I actually heard the lyrics. It was about what happened with Clock-La...

Dimitri carefully tuned his lute - he had a preference for older instruments in his performances - as he sat before a crowd of his usual clientele. Even though he'd gone straight, he still drew quite a few criminal elements to his businesses, like this club which was still running now that he'd stopped dealing in spice and counterfeit currency. Once he had everyone's attention, he began to strum...and then to sing.

Now we all know
The legend of that Clan
The Coopers who keep us in line
But let me tell you
Of one you should know true
Whose fierceness is like wrath divine

Of all the Gang there is to know
There's one whom we all see
And I shall tell you why you should
Fear the Cooper Pony

I'll tell you the tale of one who in folly
Tampered with forces unknown
By will of her master, awoke a disaster
And left that poor child alone

Through deception and games she divided the team
Trapped three of the five in the web
And don't you see, it caused fate to be
Turned by the wrath not to ebb

The fool, she declared, You have gone too far
I will show you the cruelty of fate
The power I wield, of love that's been scarred
Is far greater than that of hate

With that declaration, her magic was loosed
And the earth itself rose to her wrath
Mere walls of stone, doors of wood and steel
All fell that stood in her path

The spider that hunted, in her own web was bound
Truth cut right through all her lies
And when she was shown for what she'd become
She was shown to be what all despised

When one who had loosed this rose on steel wings
Stolen from evil so old
She claimed that poor pony for master uncaring
Only to find she'd been too bold

The battle was long and terribly fierce
From limb to limb that beast was torn
But with last despite, she broke turtle's back
And then faced that pony's scorn

She loosed all her magic, of this world and beyond
And reached deep into that twisted soul
And took from within it that seed of death
That makes a mortal whole

Now deep in the abyss, that monster does lie
Far neath cold ocean's flow
Where dark seals the eyes, and deep close the ears
And where death itself cannot go

Endlessly rotting, pain all she knows
Her screams unheard you see
Now she knows well, what we live to tell
Why you fear the Cooper Pony

With his song finished, he took a bow as the crowd snapped fingers in applause. "Thank you."

...while not exactly how I'd want to be remembered in song...I guess we can be pretty sure nobody's going to be trying to split up my family on my watch anymore.

I admit, I was...feeling really down after Uncle Murray and Uncle Bentley went away, so I'd taken to wandering to clear my head. Dad didn't entirely approve, but he didn't forbid either. Instead, he took to following me at a distance to keep track of me. I couldn't blame him for that, and I decided not to call him on it.

However, on one such wandering I found something that...well, it complicated things, but it left me feeling much better about everything...

Coco hopped from rooftop to rooftop, simply reveling in the cold air of the moonless night. It helped clear her head, helped her not think about the damages that her family had experienced. Leaping about, she pushed herself physically as she raced around the barely lit city, going wherever the path led her until she decided it would be time to make her way home.

A strange metallic grinding caught her attention. Turning, she followed the sound into a dark alley before making her way towards the back. Pulling some sacking aside, she found a tiny creature of pure metal that seemed to resemble a golden-eyed crab, struggling with its limbs. "What are you...?" she murmured thoughtfully as she leaned in close.

"Deik-Beck!" the tiny creature responded immediately.

Coco jerked her head back in surprise. "Really? You can talk?"

"Yes!" Deik-Beck confirmed, shifting about as it struggled to get free of the garbage it was caught in. "Help?"

Chuckling, Coco untangled the tiny creature. "Where did you come from?" she asked curiously.

"Clockwerk!"

"What?" Coco demanded in shock, leaping back and into a combat stance. "Clockwerk made you?"

"Yes!" Deik-Beck responded energetically.

"And what are you doing here?" she demanded coldly, swinging her cane and ready to smash the creature if it became hostile.

"Deik-Beck garbage!" Deik-Beck proclaimed, it's high pitched voice dipping in sadness.

"...why?" Coco asked carefully, inching forward again.

"Clockwerk make Deik-Beck," Deik-Beck explained. "Clockwerk want army. Clockwerk have only one Hate Chip. Clockwerk make Deik-Beck without Hate Chip. Deik-Beck work...but Deik-Beck have no hate. So Clockwerk decide Deik-Beck garbage..."

Coco felt her heart wilt at such a declaration. She knew she couldn't turn her back at this point. Maybe it was lying, maybe it was telling the truth...maybe she just desperately needed something to take care of to fill the hole her Uncles' departure had left in her life. Putting her cane away, she gently scooped up the little robo-crab. "Don't worry, Deik-Beck," she offered comfortingly. "You aren't garbage anymore, Deik-Beck," she promised. "I'll take care of you."

Deik-Beck let out a happy chime, snuggling in.

As Coco carried Deik-Beck back towards the hideout, she failed to notice its eyes ever so briefly flash red.

The Deal

This wasn't the end of surprises for us, though. As it turned out, now Commissioner Megraw had a surprise for us as well, yet another pleasant one. Seemed he had a rather different idea of how to handle crime and criminals...

Carmelita stood ramrod straight as she stared across the desk at the golden eagle that was glancing through paperwork, the one who had called her in. Finally, she dared to say, "You wanted to see me sir?"

"Ach, nah lass!" Megraw responded. "Ah can see ya frim here. Ah called ye in cause ah wanna talk to ya, ye ken?" He set the papers aside. "Ah understund ye gots somethin' of a connection to the Coopers? Those files may have been thrown out as evidence, but ah still got 'em."

Carmelita swallowed convulsively. "Y-yes sir," she stammered out. "I understand why this may be seen as a conflict of interest-"

Megraw cut her off with a wave of a few feathers. "Ach lass, yer on th' wrong track altogehtah! Ah ain't got no prahblem with what ya do after hours, or with who. But ah wan' every advantage we kin get over the villains!" He stood up, marching around the desk. "Walk with me," he instructed firmly as he made his way out of the office.

Confused, Carmelita followed along, doing her best to remain at attention even as they moved further and further away from the office. "...sir?" she finally asked, hoping to get some answers.

"A moment," Megraw instructed. "Wait here." With no more than that, he leapt into the sky.

Confused, Carmelita glanced around, wondering what had got his attention. Turning, she saw a young street tough racing down the street clutching a fancy purse. Frowning, she reached for her shock pistol.

Before her hand was even halfway there, Megraw came down out of the air like a bolt of lightning, pinning the tough to the nearest wall with one talon wrapped around the toughs head, the lethal points close to his eyes. "Now...what have we here, laddiebuck?" he growled out. "This bag dun look yer color, no sahree..."

The tough whimpered, struggling not to look at the claw millimeters from blinding him. "N-n-no sir..." he gasped out.

"Hmm...now if'n it ain't yers, what could ya be doin' with it?" Megraw asked carefully, tilting his head as he moved his beak toward the tough's ear. "Oh...ah getcha. Ye found it lost, and ye were runnin' ta the station ta hand it in so the poor lady who lost it could get it back. Ain't that raight?"

"Y-y-yes sir!" the tough responded immediately.

"Good," Megraw purred. "And why, thar's the station raight over there," he indicated with a jerk of his head. "Shouldn'a take ye more than a nonce, and ah'll see the report before the day's oot." His eyes hardened. "Course, if'n ah don't, ah know yer face and scent boy. Ah'll find ya, drag ya kickin' and screamin' back, and find out why ah ain't seen the report, ya ken?"

"Yes sir!" the tough wailed, no longer looking so tough.

"Mah apologies fer pinnin' ya lahk this," Megraw stated coldly. "Everyone...makes mistakes. Th' important thang...is we learn. Ye can learn, can't ya?"

As soon as he released the tough, the young man made a beeline for the station. Carmelita glanced at Megraw, confused. "Why'd you let him go?" she asked. "He plainly stole the purse."

"Und now he's returnin' it, and he's gonna go home and rethink his life," Megraw pointed out. "One less thief on th' street, one more productive citizen, and no need ta bring in th' courts." He shrugged his wings. "That's oor goal when we wear this badge." He tapped the badge pinned to his vest. "Und that's wut ah wanted ta talk te ya aboot. Ye can do th' same with the Coopers."

"I...I'm not sure I understand, sir," Carmelita responded nervously.

"Th' Coopers steal from criminals worse than 'em," Megraw explained. "Ye know this. Ye were using that ta bust those baddies. Ah want ye ta keep doin' that, as an official op on the off books ta keep yer tail oota th' soup. Ah want ye ta tell Cooper that if'n he agrees ta let us know which baddies he's goin' after and how bad they are ahead o tahm, we'll be there ta lock 'em up at day's end. Ah wanna make use o' his talents, and yer the key ta that."

"You want to turn him into a CI?" she asked in surprise.

"Ah want him as an ally," Megraw corrected. "Ye can hash out th' details however ya want. Just know this is now official Interpol policy. Coopers ain't baddies, just criminals. Let local law worry aboot criminals...we're here ta hunt baddies. Ya ken?"

Carmelita nodded. "I...I think I understand." I'm not entirely sure I believe it, though, she thought silently as she realized that exactly the arrangement they'd been trying to set up secretly to protect Coco just got handed to them on a silver platter.

"Thar's just one condition," Megraw pointed out. "Mahn, not policy."

"...what's that?" Carmelita asked worriedly.

Megraw grinned widely. "Ah get an invit' to tha weddin."

Carmelita blushed brightly. "We...we aren't really...I mean-"

Megraw burst into laughter that Carmelita could only classify as 'wicked old man cackle'. "No rush, no rush...just keep it in mahnd. Ah noo it's cumin..." Turning, he sauntered happily back towards the station, whistling a jaunty tune.

Carmelita stared after her superior, her mind a whirl. ...how am I going to explain this to Sly? she thought to herself.

The Test

I wasn't there when Mom passed on the news to Dad about the change in situation, but Deik-Beck was. He told me that they were 'kid-unfriendly happy' with the news, so I was glad to have been elsewhere. However, afterwards Dad had a surprise for me. It seemed he wasn't quite done testing me...

Sly smiled down at Coco as they hid in a lone tree atop a grassy hillock, overlooking a massive mansion and a distant vault, both marked with large golden dollar signs. "This is it, Coco," Sly whispered softly. "You're eight years old now, which means it's time for a particular trial each and every Cooper has gone through on their eighth birthday for the past century. The mansion below and the vault beyond...they belong to a particular wealthy industrialist. Scattered throughout both manor house and vault are items of particular value, as seen here." He handed Coco a list of items, ranging from a golden Ark to a Grail, from a coin collection to a particularly ancient ship in a bottle. Each item on the list had a 'score' listed beside it. "Both manor house and vault have heavy security, from the things we've encountered in previous heists to things you couldn't even conceive of. Your task is to get in, get one of these valuables, leave behind a calling card, and get out...all without being caught by security or by the owner of manor or vault. You are allowed to use any means at your disposal save lethal to accomplish this, but any collateral damage will be counted against you, deducted from the score you bring back. The higher the score, the better you'll be rated as a Cooper Thief...and if you're unable to get to the edge of the property without raising an alarm or being captured, you get a zero. The only other rule...is no questions."

Nodding, Coco climbed down from the tree, Deik-Beck moving silently behind her. She had quickly bonded with the tiny mechanical creature, and the pair now went everywhere together, Deik-Beck trailing happily along behind Coco no matter what she was doing. The fact that it could make the same leaps Sly and Coco could had been concerning to Sly at first, but the little creature was so good natured he eventually eased off on his suspicions. Coco now led Deik-Beck into the manor house, operating on the assumption that a place that was lived in would primarily have automated security, as guards tromping up and down the halls would wake the residents. Seeing the interior of the house was made entirely of wood, she smiled as she climbed up to make her way across the roof, Deik-Beck quickly following.

She carefully explored what she could of the manor, noting many of the items on the list on display...and the security guarding each that would set off alarms if she tried to lift one without preparations. She decided not to take any action there yet until she'd plotted out the entire manor. She was pleased to see that all security cameras were pointed to get the widest view of the halls...meaning that none were pointed at the ceilings of the halls.

She continued her explorations until she found her way to the library. While the books fascinated her, she soon found there was very little in the way of security on much of what she saw here. As far as she could tell, this was a chamber that saw such frequent use that automated security wasn't viable...which also meant there weren't any valuables on her list on display here. However, the window would make a good exit point. Slipping over, she examined the security there and carefully disabled it, making sure it wouldn't send a signal announcing that it had been disabled.

Once that was done, she turned back towards the rest of the room...only to catch sight of a fancy display case on a shelf, positioned so that anyone seated in the most comfortable chair would always be able to see it without bending too much. Moving closer, she saw that inside it was...a dime. A perfectly ordinary American dime, as best she could tell...though polished to a shine that diamonds would envy.

Confused, she checked her list...only to find the dime was marked on the list, with a score that made her jaw drop. As far as she could tell from the rules of this challenge, she could have crashed through the wall with a bulldozer to snatch the dime and still have more than double the points the next item down would give her.

Moving swiftly, she scaled down the shelves until she could reach the display case. Finding no security on it, she carefully lifted the glass and reached for the displayed dime...only to pause. She'd learned how to spot intrinsic value in anything she saw as part of her training...and this dime had no intrinsic value beyond the metal. It wasn't a rare coin, or a special one, or a collectible. Admittedly it was old - nearly a century and a half old - but there were plenty of dimes from that era floating around in collections. The only reason it would be on display like this was if it was of particular sentimental value. And if it were of enough sentimental value to be that valued by the owner...then she wasn't going to steal it.

As she reached for the case to put it back, a thought occurred to her. If every Cooper for the past century had tested themselves here at age eight...how had Sly known about it? The only way he could was if-

Coco's eyes widened, and a grin crossed her face. This wasn't about performing a theft. This was about proving she could. Reaching into her sleeve, she pulled out a calling card mask and set it behind the dime in the display case before replacing the glass. That ought to give the owner a shock when-

"Well well," a voice with a thick Scottish brogue suddenly spoke up, breaking the silence and nearly making Coco fall off the bookcase. "Chutzpah, consideration, and smarts...an interesting combination. I am impressed."

Turning slowly, Coco caught sight of an elderly duck in a blue waistcoat and black top hat holding a curiously configured gun negligently in one hand and a lit candelabra in the other. She said nothing as she stared at him, not sure what was going to happen now.

"Ye really aren't what ah expected," the elderly gent continued. "Course, after six generations, ah expected another raccoon. Who did Sly wed ta have you? Conner would have loved ta meet 'em, that's fer sure."

Coco smiled softly. Her suspicions had been confirmed. "Adopted," she responded softly.

"Ah, that explains it," the old duck confirmed. "Don't go reaching for any of yer needles, mind. Wouldn't work on me - ah'm much too tough - and then ah'd have ta pull this trigger. New weapon Gearloose made fer me. Emits a stunning field on a wide spread. Won't even need to have it pointed at ye ta get ya, just have ya be in the room ah'm facing...and ah'll be pullin' the trigger if ya so much as twitch."

Coco shifted her smile to wicked as she renewed her grip on the display case. "Then I need to be in the room, right?" Focusing, she activated her invisibility technique. While it normally didn't work on someone looking right at her, if she'd given him reason to doubt his senses...

The sudden banging of the window drew the old duck's attention, and when he turned back it looked like Coco and the case with the dime had vanished, leaving a Cooper mask behind. "Goat-buggering son of a whore-monkey!" the old duck swore sulfurously before rushing towards the front of the manor, moving far faster than Coco thought he'd be able to.

Smiling, she dropped her invisibility and put away the second calling card. Leaving the case with its card behind, she slipped over to the window, renewed her invisibility technique, and slowly made her way back towards the front gate. She heard a few electrical discharges, and knew Deik-Beck was leading the old duck a merry chase. Once she reached the opposite side of the front gate - and thus outside the property - she gave a sharp whistle.

Diek-Beck promptly raced over to her, the duck hot on his mechanical heels. As he caught sight of Coco outside the property, the old duck slowed, catching his breath as he leaned on his knees. "Well, looks like ye won after all," he gasped out. "Now, could ya please return me number one dime?" he begged plaintively.

"I don't have it," Coco responded. "I left it in the library. I'm not about to take something so important to you personally. But then again, this was never about taking something from you...just proving I could."

The old duck chuckled. "Aye, that it was lass." Reaching into his waistcoat, he pulled out a tablet and swiped across it a few times. Smiling, he tapped a key and printed out a picture of said dime leaning against the calling card. Taking out a pen, he signed it. "Ye can take this back ta yer father, and tell him ye done good. And ah'll be makin' sure ta put sensors on the ceilings in the future!"

"So that's why you do it," Coco observed. "Each generation of Cooper finds a new hole in your security for you to patch."

"Aye," the elder confirmed. "So...have ye got a mother? Sly don't deserve ta be aloon."

Coco smiled softly. "Carmelita Fox," she informed him.

"Th' Interpol Inspector?" the gent gasped out in shock. He then grinned widely. "In that case, I expect the lot of ya at dinner within the month. Ya deserve a few friends yer own age as well...and while they're a little older than ya, me nephews'll make ya welcome." Smiling, he turned and marched back to the manor whistling a jaunty tune.

Smiling, Coco made her way back towards the hillock, looking down at the picture and the message there.

Yer tougher than the toughies, smarter than the smarties, and tricky as can be.
Scrooge McDuck

The Dinner

It wasn't long before Dad managed to arrange to make that dinner appointment Scrooge insisted on. The three of us dressed our best, at Mom's insistence. Dad tried to point out that Scrooge was a family friend and as such it was okay to dress casual, but Mom wouldn't hear of it. Then again, when you work in international law enforcement, I suppose it makes sense to want to make a good first impression on one of the most famous businessmen in the world...especially when they own approximately 20% of the entire world's wealth (conservatively speaking) and that's just the assets that can be measured in money...not to mention that being around for a century and a half means he's got political pull in every country in the world. Still, he seemed to like my first impression, even if Mom looked like she nearly had a heart attack when I told her about it and showed her the signed picture...

Coco glanced around the table, trying not to stare at the lavish feast laid out and instead focus on those attending. Scrooge McDuck was at the head of the table, of course, with Sly and Carmelita nearby. Scrooge had originally come down in a blue doublet and the same top hat he'd worn when he'd confronted Coco...but then he'd caught sight of the guests.

Carmelita wore a shimmering black dress that hugged her figure, hanging from one shoulder and going straight down to her ankles with a slit up one side. Sly was wearing a suit and tie. Coco had an adorable cornflower blue dress that flared slightly at the hem. Even Deik-Beck had been dressed up with a bow tie, top hat, and monocle.

Scrooge had promptly stated that he wasn't going to be underdressed to his own event, and then marched back upstairs. He'd come back down in an understated black doublet and foot wraps - webbed feet didn't really work with shoes - though retaining the same top hat. His nephews - Huey, Dewey, and Louie - were dressed similarly, though each wearing a tie in red, blue, and green respectively...the only way Coco was able to tell them apart, she hated to admit. The only other member of the household present was a canid by the name of Duckworth, who happily brought drinks, fresh plates, and whatever else anyone required. He showed a surprising level of efficiency, as Coco barely had time to register distress at the meat course - what to the others was a rather succulent beef stew - before her bowl had been swapped for a tofu stew that looked just as delectable and didn't make Coco uncomfortable to eat meat. Coco could eat meat easily, but it always made her uncomfortable to do so, for some reason.

Coco and Deik-Beck had been seated with the triplets, and the five of them were already thick as thieves, as oddly appropriate as it was to say. Upon learning that the Coopers were a family of thieves, they'd immediately started badgering Coco with questions about her 'heists' and other similar adventures. Coco had answered, though with some embarrassment and trying to be as modest about it as possible, and had countered with questions about living with Scrooge McDuck. This had led to tale after tale of one adventure or another that left her breathless to conceive of it all. The trio also seemed fascinated with Deik-Beck, especially upon discovering he actually could eat. They continuously gave him small morsels, constantly trying to figure out where the bits went.

Scrooge was engaging in conversation with Carmelita as this happened. "So you're with Interpol, ay?" he asked carefully.

"Y-yes sir," Carmelita responded nervously. "An Inspector, based primarily out of Paris."

"Fox...Fox...ah, I know the name!" Scrooge proclaimed suddenly. "Conrad, Seiver, and Robin, yes?"

Carmelita's eyes widened in surprise. "My father, grandfather, and great-grandfather," she murmured in awe. "You...know them?"

"Ha!" Scrooge barked proudly. "Knew them? Been on cases with all three o' them! Good to see that tree's still growing strong. You've got the same hunter's eye they did when last I met them." He glanced slyly at Sly. "Ah take it ya ain't told them about all this yet?"

Carmelita glanced down nervously. "I..."

"No worries, lass! I ain't about ta spill the beans!" Scrooge hastened to reassure her. "Still, ya ain't got nothin' ta worry about. A good cop goes after the baddies and protects the good guys...no matter what side o' the law they're on! That's one thing Megraw and I agree on! And yer family, too." He leaned in conspiratorially. "Ya shoulda seen the trouble me, Conrad, and Conner got up ta huntin' the worst o' the worst tagether."

Sly nearly chocked on his drink. "M-My father?" he gasped out in surprise. "And Carmelita's?"

"Aye! Adventure makes strange bedfellows and all that, not that those tales ever made it inta any official report!" Scrooge confirmed. "Course, their friendship was surprisinly strong. E'en after Conner went back ta his crew, he never forgot his friend, and neither did Conrad. They used aliases...but they were each other's best man."

Carmelita did her best to regain what composure she could. "Well...at least I don't need to worry about too much fatherly disapproval..." she murmured under breath. And maybe Coco could meet her grandfather, she thought to herself silently.

Sly decided it was time to change the subject. "There's something I've been wondering, ever since...well, since you wrote me about the tradition of trying to rob you after Bentley, Murray and I left the orphanage." His face fell slightly at the mention of his friends, his family, but he quickly pressed on. "How are you still so spry at 150 years old?"

"That's mah secret, lad," Scrooge countered with a sly smirk. "And that's one area tis best not ta pry."

"I only ask because the only other experience I have with someone living so long-"

"Ah, Clockwerk," Scrooge interrupted understandingly. "Yes, ah can see why ye'd be concerned. No worries, though, ah don't use anything like that devil, praise be the last trace o' him rests at the bottom of the sea fer all eternity!"

"Beep!" Deik-Beck peeped up worriedly. Coco glanced away from the table.

"Could you not speak so callously of that?" Carmelita hissed firmly. "Coco's still coming to terms with what she did."

Scrooge's face fell. "Mah apologies, lasses," he offered, both to Carmelita and to Coco. "As long as ah've been around, ah've come ta terms with there bein' some people the world is simply better off without...and that there should'na be no regrets fer what ye have ta do ta deal with those when fate forces yer hand." He placed his hand against his chest. "Ah may not be hate fueled like that monster, but ah guess mah soul isn't as clean as I'd like ta think. I've...forgotten what it was like...ta be so innocent."

Coco looked up at him. "It's okay, sir-"

"Ah!" Scrooge interrupted. "Not sir! The Coopers have been mah friends fer five generations! Far as I'm concerned, that makes us family. So ta you, like the boys here...ah'm Uncle Scrooge." He smiled warmly at the little filly.

Coco found herself returning the smile as the coldness that had settled in her chest from the mention of Bentley and Murray faded. "Okay, Uncle Scrooge!" she replied happily.

"That'a girl!" Scrooge praised, reaching over to ruffle her mane affectionately. Sly and Carmelita both managed a warm smile, feeling much more relaxed now.

The Discussion

After dinner, Huey, Dewey, and Louie invited me to explore the manor with them. While on the surface that was a perfectly reasonable thing for children to do after dinner while the grownups talked, it was plain to me they were hoping I would teach them a few thieving tricks I knew so they could get up to even more mischief. After hearing some of their tales, I'd decided I would - though nothing secret from the Thievius Raccoonus, just the basic stuff - in exchange for a glimpse at the things in that 'Junior Woodchuck Guidebook' they'd talked so much about. Seriously, with all the things they said they'd pulled off based on what it taught them, I half expected it to have been written by Macgyver! Seriously, what kind of scout handbook teaches you how to melt gold down into plates to repair a ship and make it seaworthy, among other things? Heck, what kind of book could possibly say 'among other things' after boasting that?

While we were indulging in our mischief, Uncle Scrooge - how did he know it would make me so happy to call him that? - invited Mom and Dad to the study to talk. The fact that it was the very room I 'didn't' steal the dime from made me a little embarrassed...especially after the boys started making a fuss over it...

Scrooge smiled to himself as he stared at the Cooper calling card inside the display case holding his Number One Dime. He'd decided to leave it there, much as he'd left the calling cards alongside every other item past Coopers had stolen only to return, as reminders of good friends now gone. He looked forward to many confused glances and knowing chuckles regarding this one, followed by an absence of explanations. With that smile, he turned back to his guests.

Sly and Carmelita were sitting together on the loveseat, the first use it had gotten since Scrooge himself was young enough to be interested in courting. Normally when he had guests in here, they sat on the sofa. When it was the boys, they generally clambered over his seat as he read them stories of his past. Mrs. Beakley and Webby preferred the rocking chair near the fireplace. But now, Sly and Carmelita were snuggled up on the loveseat nursing glasses of Scrooge's best brandy, both looking torn between comfortable and awkward...leading to a knowing chuckle from Scrooge. "Ah knew ye were mother and father ta the lass, but ah'm glad ta see somethin' more between ya. The Coopers, the Foxes...both lines deserve bein' continued. And yer fathers would be happy ta see ya together." He lifted his own glass of brandy as though toasting them.

Carmelita turned her glass over in her hand, staring into her drink as though the contents could provide answers. "You're...you're sure Dad would be...happy about this?" she asked worriedly.

Scrooge frowned as he sat down. "Somethin' tells me things aren't completely as they seem. Tell me."

As Carmelita continued to stare into her glass, Sly looked Scrooge in the eye. "It was Coco who brought us together," he explained. "Specifically, her asking if we were her Mommy and Daddy...and me saying yes because at the time keeping her from screaming about 'strangers' was paramount."

"I'm definitely in agreement with you about Seft now," Carmelita spoke up softly, her hands clenching around the glass. "I'll pull the trigger myself if I get him in my sights."

"Ah, that howlin' jobby," Scrooge muttered, startling a chuckle out of Sly. "The only reason it's still up fer debate whether he or Clockwerk was worse is because he hasn't been around as long!" He spat his contempt into the fireplace. "Aye, he's on me 'better dead' list too. World'd be a much better place if boobs like that did'na exist."

Sly nodded. "Anyway...trying to balance being her parents, being ourselves, and being 'cops and robbers'...has been awkward at times."

"Necessary, because having one of us on each side of the law meant Coco was that much safer...but awkward," Carmelita confirmed. "We're past the worst of it, and Megraw's instructions have made things a lot smoother, but..." She returned to staring into her glass.

Scrooge scooted forward, resting his chin on his cane. "Go on, lass. Ah won't judge."

Carmelita took a deep breath. "When Neyla's actions discredited me as an Interpol Agent, I thought that the best way to continue to protect Coco...was to join the Cooper Gang completely, since my career as a cop was over. As much as I hated losing that career...I didn't regret the decision. And being a full fledged member of the Gang...it was fun. And while we were racing around, I was...content for the first time in a long time. As much as I'm glad to have my job back...part of me wonders if I still want it. And...I'm terrified of what Father will say if I tell him that."

"He'll say he's been there," Scrooge stated bluntly. "He saw the appeal o' Conner's lifestyle, and how much easier it was ta deal with the baddies when he did'na have ta be law abidin...but he made the choice ta stay a cop, cause without good cops, no amount o' good criminals can protect civilians." He shook his head with a chuckle. "He won't judge ya fer bein' tempted...and ye've got a lot more than he did encouragin' ya ta sway. Yer gonna stay a cop, ain't ya?"

"Of course," Carmelita confirmed insistently. "Not only has Coco's situation - and our reasons for the original arrangement - unchanged...I still love being a cop." Smiling shyly, she slipped her hand into Sly's. "As long as I'm never forced to arrest this one again..."

As Scrooge grinned, a figure in the shadows slowly stood up. "Glad to hear it," the shadowed figure said, his voice so soft it was almost a purr.

Sly started to leap out of the seat at the sight of the massive silhouette he somehow missed...and nearly leapt out of his fur when Carmelita gasped out, "D-Dad?"

Conrad Fox slowly stepped out of the shadows, his massive musculature easily dwarfing Carmelita's own size, silver only just beginning to tinge his copper-bronze fur, his old uniform still fitting tightly to his frame. "Scrooge was right, Lita," he said softly. "Conner would be so happy to see you two together." He blinked away a few tears. "But I am here...and I can be happy for both of us." Reaching forward, he pulled Sly and Carmelita to their feet and into a tight bear hug.

As he watched the family reunion, Scrooge opened an old photo album. Inside were several pictures of varying ages, each containing three figures. Though the figures differed greatly in each image, in each picture they were a raccoon, himself, and a fox. Chuckling to himself, he raised a toast, both to the happy faces in the pictures and those before him before downing his shot, feeling mighty pleased with himself.

The Quest

Meeting Grandpa was wonderfully fun, especially since he was so happy about Mom and Dad. He was all too happy to spoil me, and an extension to the family was always welcome.

Mom being able to connect with her family over all of this got Dad thinking about his own family. To his surprise, Grandpa and Uncle Scrooge were able to inform him of a few of his Dad's old friends...specifically, his old Gang. One he was able to get in contact with immediately was McSweeney...who was actually in jail...

With a little pull from Carmelita and approval from Megraw, it was easy enough for Sly to arrange a meeting with his Dad's old partner from the 'law-abiding' side of the 'bars'...though it wasn't actually bars that McSweeney was behind. The overweight pink walrus was locked behind a reinforced Plexiglas wall with ventilation holes at the top, tested to be virtually indestructible. "McSweeney?" Sly asked carefully as he approached.

"Call me Jim," the elderly thief replied immediately as he reached into the folds of his flesh, extracting an old Cooper Gang Calling Card before slipping it back into hiding. "Yer Conner's boy, aren't you?"

"I am," Sly confirmed. "You knew my father?"

"Quite well, quite well," Jim responded readily. "We were old friends, went on many heists together. I was his muscleman, you know. Did the heavy lifting when it was called for, and was the power behind many escapes."

"...Murray..." Sly murmured thoughtfully as his mind went to his missing friend.

"So you have someone like that in your own gang?" Jim asked curiously. "Good, good...I suppose you have someone who handles all the tech, too?"

"Bentley," Sly confirmed. "The three of us have been close friends since we were kids. But..." He glanced away, not wanting to think or talk about it.

"So you've got a good relationship, then," Jim confirmed. "That's good. Value it. But keep an eye out for a mandrill by the name of Dr. M. He was our tech, and our parting with him was not on good terms. Somethin' about the division of loot, tradition, and the Vault when Conner quit thieving because his wife was pregnant."

Sly was surprised that the reason his Dad stopped thieving was because of him, but another detail caught his mind. "The Vault?" he asked insistently.

"Yeah," Jim confirmed, fishing around in his pockets and pulling out an old map. "The Cooper Vault. Yer family's been hiding all its loot there for generations, each one adding the lion's share of their heists to it to leave for future generations. Only a Cooper can open it." He stared at the map for a time. "When he retired, your Dad left this with me. Told me to keep it safe, and make sure it never fell into the wrong hands." He shrugged his shoulders. "Well, I'm big and tough, never really fit with polite society, and couldn't really cut it as a thief on my own...so I figured the best way to keep it safe was to get myself arrested and thrown in jail for a long time." Shifting it back into his pocket, he leaned back and stretched. "Got a rep in here that makes other inmates - and guards - leave me alone, get three squares a day, exercise yard to stay in shape, the sheets are clean, and I get free cable! Seems a pretty sweet deal for me."

"You got yourself thrown in jail...to protect the map Dad gave you?" Sly asked in surprise.

Jim shrugged again. "Only place I ever really felt I belonged was in the Gang. When it broke up, I didn't really have a place of my own. Sides, long as he knew where to find me, figured I'd see Conner again when he needed to give you the map. You look a lot like him, actually." He blinked, looking around. "Say, how come he ain't here?"

Sly winced. "Dad...he's dead. Mom too..."

Jim blinked owlishly. "Oh...oh wow. I'm sorry. He...he was a good friend to me, a good person. And yer Mom was real lovely. Sorry fer your loss."

Sly sank back into a chair. "...they were avenged," he offered softly.

Jim's face briefly hardened, and he then turned away. "Oh...are you okay now?"

"...yeah," Sly spoke up after a time. "I have my friends. And I've got Carmelita and Coco..."

"Who are they?" Jim asked curiously.

"My girlfriend, and our daughter," Sly explained warmly, a wide smile on his face.

Jim managed a smile in response. "...here." He pushed the map through the ventilation grill. "Pretty sure Conner left it with me to give to you."

Sly caught the map with a smile. "Thanks, Jim. I'm going to go take a look. I've got things to add to the Vault myself...and I want to look at my family's legacy."

"Not alone I hope!"

Sly jerked as he heard that voice. "Bentley?" Turning, he found the turtle grinning at him, a mechanized wheelchair whirring as it carried him over. "Bentley, I've missed you! Where have you been?" Running forward, he pulled his old friend into a hug that was warmly returned.

"Medicine didn't give me positive results for treatment, so I turned to machines," Bentley explained. "Once I had this chair built to do everything for me that I could do when I could walk, I came to find you. Of course, it would have been easier if you hadn't moved around so much. Seriously, what are you doing in Duckberg?"

Sly chuckled softly as Jim watched on with a soft smile. "Bentley, have I got a story for you..."

Gathering: Take 1

The map led straight to Kaine Island(1), the location of the Cooper Vault. However, Dr. M had somehow acquired the deed to the island, and between the island's own hazards and Dr. M's security, we would need more force than we could normally bring to bear to get in. Dad, Mom, Uncle Bentley and I just wouldn't be enough. We'd need more help. We'd need...a Gang.

We needed a ballistics expert. We needed an aquatic expert. With Bentley having to focus his control on his wheelchair, we needed a RC expert. And we needed someone to bring the extra muscle. While the others would take some figuring out, there was only one answer for that last part: we needed Uncle Murray back. We didn't want to intrude if he still needed time to heal from what happened with the Clock-La incident, but we didn't want anyone else taking his place either.

This led us to Venice, Italy, the territory of the Vincenetti Gang, led by the former lion opera singer Don Octavio. It was dangerous, but we had to find Murray...

Coco stared around at the floating city of Venice. Its beauty shone in the lights playing over the endless canals...though it would have been more picturesque without the Ferris Wheel, and if the waters didn't have black stains within them. Still, the relaxing sail in the covered boat made it easy for them to reach Rialto Bridge, a rather prominent landmark.

When Carmelita had been informed they would be at work here, she had brought a task force here specifically to investigate the tainting of the waters and a possible connection to the Vincenetti Gang. She'd also carefully placed a Cooper Calling Card at the Rialto Bridge with a specific time marked on it. With luck, Murray would have found it and known to meet there...assuming he was willing to.

As they reached the bridge, Murray was waiting for them. "Uncle Murray!" Coco called out happily, rushing forward to embrace him.

Murray leaned down to return the embrace, seeming entirely at peace with himself now. "It's good to see you again, Coco," he assured her happily.

Coco stepped back for a clearer look at him. "You look...different."

Murray did look quite different. White body paint drew designs over his belly and face, and a yellow cape and rope necklace of teeth hung over his usual blue shirt. A grass crown rested atop his head. "A different walk of life calls for different garb," he explained readily. His expression then turned nervous. "Is...is Bentley here?"

"He's back at our temporary hideout," Sly explained as he hopped lightly out of the boat. "He didn't want to risk the meeting getting too emotional if you weren't ready to face him yet."

Murray sighed in relief. "I'm grateful. I...I think I'm ready, but..." He glanced away. "I have to complete my journey..."

"Then let us help you with that," Sly offered. "What is it you need to do here?"

"I cannot return to my Guru until the black waters run pure," Murray declared, gesturing to the river where black sludge of some sort was pouring out of a grate and into the water.

Looking closer, Coco frowned. "Looks like tar. Wonder where it's coming from?"

"We'll be looking into that," Sly confirmed. "You'll be here when we have information, right?"

"My ears are as wide as a whale neath the waves," Murray confirmed.

Coco blinked in surprise. "You're...really into that 'Dream Time' stuff you wrote us about, huh?"

"My mind is as clear as the woods after a forest fire," he declared profoundly.

It was a good thing we were already intending to help Mom deal with the tar in the water before leaving Venice. When we communicated with her that it was now our prime goal to help Uncle Murray complete his spiritual journey, she promised us complete cooperation of her entire task force under Megraw's authorization. Apparently, he hadn't been kidding about using us to flush out the real bad guys, and as long as no police officer actually saw us steal anything, all our actions would be marked in the official report as 'aid from civilian agents'.

...as if anyone would ever see us steal something, anyway...

Since we were targeting Don Octavio's operation, our first two missions involved tailing him to take pictures of his criminal activities, and breaking into the Opera House to learn of his plans. Dad took the former since he could still leap much higher than I to get up onto the rooftops to evade detection, while I took the break in where my smaller body would prove an advantage...as would Deik-Beck's aid. The little crab was an excellent multi-tool...

Coco and Deik-Beck made their way into the Opera House via a wooden hatch in the side yard. Several security measures within required activating two different switches simultaneously, which the pair were more than able to do together. The watery canal beneath the House proved more frustrating to navigate, as Deik-Beck had to cling to Coco's back to get across and she wasn't used to leaping about with cargo. However, they were able to manage it, only to come to a halt at a reinforced door. "Wish I had one of Uncle Bentley's bombs right about now..." Coco murmured thoughtfully.

"Have bomb!" Deik-Beck piped up, leveling one claw at the door and opening it to reveal a gun. "Here I go!"

Coco ducked back as the gun went off, the explosive charge rocking Deik-Beck back on his many legs and destroying the reinforced door. "...you're just full of surprises," she murmured, petting Deik-Beck on the head.

After a bit of vent crawling, the pair had to deal with a few guards...but Coco's needles had lost none of their effectiveness, rendering said guards momentary distractions at best. Finally, they reached the computer at the center of the base. "...wish I knew the first thing about hacking," Coco murmured softly. "I never could grasp Uncle Bentley's explanations."

"Plug me in!" Deik-Beck offered.

Smiling, Coco lifted the little robot onto the keyboard, where it promptly jammed its legs into the circuitry. He hummed for a time, then hopped back out. "Download complete!"

"Then let's go!" Coco directed, scooping up the little bot and rushing for the exit. Getting out proved far easier than getting in.

Getting back, I was unsurprised to learn that Don Octavio was indeed behind the tar in the waters...though a little upset Dad and Uncle Bentley destroyed the Ferris Wheel before I got a chance to ride it.

(1) I know the map was supposed to be in the museum, but I noticed an incongruity. Sly, Bentley, and Murray are together when the museum scene happens, but Sly and Bentley are going to recruit Murray again when they already know the Vault is on Kaine Island. One of those must be flawed, and as the museum scene isn't in the game, I'm going by the game.

Gathering: Take 3

Once Dad finished placing the explosives Uncle Bentley had prepared to deal with all the advertisements, Octavio tried to kidnap Uncle Bentley. Had I heard about this before they got back, I would have definitely done something. Unfortunately, their operation went down at the same time as I was working with Uncle Murray on the oil drums, so I wasn't able to. Dad was able to save him, though, and Uncle Bentley made a mental note to add weapons to his wheelchair that could be used to prevent such a snatching in the future.

Once we were all gathered, all that was left was planning how to handle Octavio's recital, and stopping his plan for good to clear the canals. The first step was Dad using the disguise to get Bentley into the pump room, so he could destroy the main pump. Once that was done, we were to take out Octavio himself...and make sure Mom found him with the detonation switch, giving her more than enough to throw him in the clink for a long time.

My job in all of this was to make sure Mom got there at the right time, and then to make sure Murray saw the clear waters. The first part of that was rather easy. I just went right up to the door of the police precinct and asked to see my Mommy...

Coco smiled up at Carmelita as she was shown into her office. "Hi Mommy!"

Carmelita shook her head as the door closed, leaving her alone with her incorrigible equine child. "What are you and your father up to this time?" she asked dryly.

"We're going to bust Octavio!" Coco declared happily. "And set it up so you can snatch him for attempting to hold the entire city of Venice hostage to force the citizens to listen to his opera."

Carmelita raised an eyebrow in surprise. "Really? How are you going to manage that?"

"Dropping a chandelier on him before he can attack Bentley for showing him up at his recital," Coco replied easily.

"...you realize if we actually see that happen, we'd have to arrest you, right?" Carmelita pointed out dryly.

"But if you happen upon the scene when the chandelier's on top of him, it'd be your duty to dig him out and see to it he got medical attention," Coco countered. She then grinned mischievously. "Which includes documenting all his personal effects to make sure he gets everything back once he's better, right?"

Carmelita's eyes widened, and she returned the grin. "So we're going to get into position, and you send us a signal for when we should charge in and 'assist' him?"

"The signal will be a loud crash!" Coco confirmed eagerly, giggling a little wickedly.

Getting Uncle Murray into position was a little harder...mostly because it involved searching the entire city to locate him. Once I did...

"There you are!" Coco called out happily as she finally found Murray, rushing up to his side.

"You were looking for me?" the large hippo asked in surprise. "Did you need my help with something else?"

"Actually, I need you to come watch something," Coco pointed out. "We're about to trap the guy who was doing the tar pumping, and not long after that the waters will turn clear. Don't you want to see him taken down?"

Murray hesitated. "Well...I do like seeing - or being in - a good fight..." He shook his head. "But no. I'm supposed to be peaceful. I really shouldn't take pleasure in things like that anymore..."

Coco blinked in surprise. She had been certain the idea of seeing another bad guy taken down would have grabbed Murray, but apparently it took more than that. She decided to try a different tack. "Well...you can't get much more peaceful than an opera recital, right?"

"Opera?" Murray gasped in shock. "Gag me! I hate that stuff! I wouldn't listen to that for a triple chocolate fudge sundae!"

"But Uncle Bentley's going to be performing!" Coco complained. "It can't be that bad!"

Murray blinked in surprise. "Bentley...can sing opera? I never knew he had that kind of talent."

Coco's eyes widened as she saw a strategy that might work. "Honestly, I don't know if he can. He seems confident...but I'm sure knowing you're there to give him emotional support would do wonders for him."

Murray hesitated, then sighed. "I...I owe him all the support I can give him," he stated finally. "I'll be there."

I'd wanted to reassure Uncle Murray, tell him he didn't really owe Uncle Bentley anything and that Uncle Bentley felt the same way...but I was pretty sure he wouldn't listen. It would either be because I was 'just a kid', or because they needed to work it out between themselves. Either way, I got him there.

The plan worked flawlessly. Murray's old destructive thrills came back as he watched the chandelier fall, trapping Octavio beneath it and destroying the stage he was standing on at the same time, sending pieces flying up into the air in flaming pinwheels as the chandelier sparked the tar that was underneath the stage. Dad and Uncle Bentley vacated immediately as Mom came with her squad and carted Octavio off...officially for medical attention, but shortly to arrest him. After that, it was just waiting for the waters to turn clear with no more tar pumping out of them.

Thankfully, we were all able to do that together as a family. Mom was even able to join us now that Octavio was behind bars. Uncle Murray and Uncle Bentley were a little awkward with each other...but things smoothed over as Jean Bison drove up in the van, complete with all the repairs and upgrades Uncle Bentley had designed just for Uncle Murray. Seeing his beloved van so lovingly cared for really made Uncle Murray happy.

Gathering: Take 4

Despite Uncle Murray rejoining us, it quickly became plain that his heart was still conflicted. He felt he'd abandoned his Dreamtime training, and disappointed his Guru. Of course, we weren't going to let this stand. If a talk with his Guru is what he needed to be at peace, then that's what we would make happen. We set course for the Australian Outback, where his Guru resided.

As we were heading off, however, I had a bit of a surprise meeting at the airport of all places...

As the group - dressed in disguises of Coco's design - made their way through the airport, Coco briefly fell back towards an air vent so she could collect Diek-Beck, who had no chance of making his way through airport security in the standard way. Disguised as a stuffed animal, he could make it through easily once past the metal detectors, but getting through them would be an exercise in futility, especially considering his in-built weaponry that couldn't be removed.

As Coco balanced Diek-Beck on her back, a familiar voice startled her.

"So where ya off to in such a hurry, little chile?"

Coco yelped in surprise and spun, startled to see who was watching her. "Ms. Ruby!" she gasped in surprise. "You're out of jail?"

The lady alligator chuckled from her place in a kiosk nearby, selling various knickknacks. "Mrs. now, little filly. And yes, my sentence got commuted after the Contessa mess, thanks ta you lot and Megraw stickin' his nose in. Now Muggsy and I are goin' legit, makin' a place for the three of us."

Coco gasped happily. "Three?" she squealed eagerly.

At that moment, a tiny creature crawled its way up Mrs. Ruby's back. She had an elongated crocodile snout, a bulldog face, fur over scales, short, well-muscled legs ending in webbed talons, and a long, whip-like tail covered in scales. Her large brown eyes stared out in wide-eyed fascination, a pink bow in her thick, bushy green hair. Mrs. Ruby chuckled as she held her arm forward so the critter could crawl towards Coco. "This be our lil' Felicia."

Coco squealed happily as she got up on her hind legs to get nose to nose with the little tyke. "She's adorable!"

Mrs. Ruby chuckled indulgently as she pulled Felicia back before she could try and bite Coco. "And a right spitfire, just like her Mama!" she confirmed. "Now, 'bout what ah asked ya before?"

"Oh!" Coco gasped out in realization. "We're going to the Australian Outback so Uncle Murray can have a face to face with his Dreamtime Teacher."

Mrs. Ruby went pale. "Child...maybe ya better sit this trip out..."

"What?" Coco gasped out in shock. "But...but I just got my whole family back together-"

"Ah taught you what I know about magic," Mrs. Ruby interrupted, "and ya took to it like a duck ta water. Now, there are some who would call voodoo like I taught you dark, and I'll admit there are dark aspects to it...but the magic Down Under, it make what I do look stage!"

Coco's eyes widened. "It's...that potent? And that...dark?"

Mrs. Ruby tilted one hand side to side. "Say instead it's that primal," she corrected. "The magic we use? Mostly passive, and long as you stick to the rules you got no problems. The magic Outback? Got a will of its own, chile, and it only works for ya if it chooses to...and if it decides it don't like you, your only chance is gettin' out o' the Outback fast as ya can. The Light there is blindin', and the Dark all consumin..." She shivered dramatically. "I won't stop ya from goin' - not that ah could - but be very careful how ya use yer magic down there."

Coco paled, and nodded. "I'll...I'll be careful..."

"Ah know ya will," Mrs. Ruby confirmed. "Course, with how long your missions take, I'll probably be in the States by the time you get done. When ya do, look me up, okay?"

"Promise!" Coco confirmed as she raced off to catch up with her family before they started to worry for her.

I decided to keep my silence on the warning until we actually landed in Australia. The last thing I wanted to do was upset Uncle Murray when he was looking so happy. As we settled in for the long flight, he regaled us with tale after tale of the Guru's abilities, and I became more and more excited. While I remembered Mrs. Ruby's warning, I couldn't help but think I could benefit from the Guru's teachings as well. Even if I didn't try to tap the magics of the Outback, his techniques might help me to better utilize my own magic.

Of course, Dad's thoughts went to possibly recruiting the Guru into the Gang to help get into the Vault. I wasn't about to argue with that, especially not when I was hoping to learn from him.

When we got to the Outback, though, I began to wonder if there would even be any magic for me to tap. The entire area the Guru was supposed to be was overrun with industrial machinery and mining operations, and there was no sign of the Guru. A quick overview revealed it was an Opal mining operation, and not entirely legal. Mom immediately moved out to connect with local law enforcement to crack down on the operation, while the rest of us gathered to make our plans.

At first, Uncle Bentley thought I could track the Guru down using my magic to scan for another magic user, but I then had to pass on Mrs. Ruby's warning. Dad immediately agreed that I shouldn't try to use my magic until we were able to make contact with the Guru, making that our number one priority...

Gathering: Take 5

Given the danger of the local magic to me - especially with how torn up the environment was - I was under firm instructions to stay in the hideout until we found the Guru. Given the first time I placed my hoof on bare dirt outside I felt such a strong surge of rage and pain from the land I nearly blacked out, I was more than happy to listen.

Thankfully, that was Dad's priority, with Uncle Murray guiding him around to the various locations where the Guru might be. Dad managed to find him in an area of the miner's camp set up as a makeshift stockade. The conversation there had been...interesting, from what Dad said...

As Sly dropped down in front of the fenced off area, he saw the short purple koala come running up to him. Between the red headcloth, the facial markings, the beads in his beard, and the brown loincloth, Sly immediately recognized him as the Guru Murray had described. "You must be the Guru," Sly greeted warmly. "I'm a good friend of Murray's. He's come asking to be released from his training."

The Guru responded in a rapid-fire rendition of his own native dialect...and yet the meaning somehow inserted itself directly into Sly's mind, though not in words. He got the sense that the Guru couldn't make a decision regarding Murray's training without a face-to-face meeting.

"Sure," Sly agreed. "I'll just bust you out of here, and we'll go talk to him-"

The Guru interrupted. This time, the message carried the images of a staff and a moonstone, along with a refusal to move without them.

"You...seriously won't leave without your gear?" Sly asked in shock.

The message that came back caught Sly off guard. It carried with it the sense of the damage and corruption of the land, the danger it possessed, and the need to purify it. The last images were of the Guru using his staff and moonstone to walk a clean path through a lake of poison across the land, Coco walking safely behind him.

"You...you already know about Coco?" Sly gasped out, surprised.

The Guru waved his hand dismissively at that, the message that came through with his rapid-fire words suggesting that such a feat was the equivalent for the Guru as drinking water. He followed up with an image of protections he could cast to let Coco endure the corruption of the Earth to which she was bound.

Sly nodded. "Right. I'll get you that staff and moonstone, and be right back."

The Guru expressed a lack of a need to hurry, as another day or two would not make that much of a difference in the level of corruption, though an insistence that the area be cleared of miners, as he would be unable to use his powers so long as the Spirits of Dreamtime were enraged by the continued desecration.

"Still going to hurry," Sly pointed out. "Coco doesn't like sitting still." With that, he turned and headed back to the hideout.

The Guru sent one last message, insisting on meeting with Murray and Bentley individually before he decided if he would aid the group. Along with this message was a warning, an image of a mask filled with evil. The Mask of Dark Earth.

It's pretty amazing just how much information the Guru can pass so quickly. This Dreamtime stuff sure sounds potent. After hearing about it, I definitely was looking forward to learning from him if he'd consent to teach me.

Unfortunately, this still left me stuck in the hideout until the mission was all but concluded. Dad had to go fetch the Moonstone and walking stick, though I did get a chance to feel the power in them once he'd retrieved them. It was quite potent, and got me all the more eager to meet the Guru.

Uncle Murray and Uncle Bentley both went to meet with the Guru, but they refused to talk about their actual conversations with him. I get the feeling that the discussions were intensely private, especially considering how thoughtful they both were when they returned. They also took care of quite a few things in the meantime, towards helping the Guru purify the land.

...I'm really disappointed I didn't get to ride around in the giant super-truck. Uncle Murray made it sound so much fun... Then again, I'm kinda glad I didn't see the scorpions. I still have nightmares about my brief glimpses of Seft...

Thankfully, Uncle Bentley's meeting with the Guru was the end of that, and the Guru was happy to escape then and come meet with me...after taking out a few drills and mining machines to appease the Dreamtime Spirits on the way back...

Coco had been prepared to stare up at the Guru in awe. Much to her surprise, however, he wasn't that much taller than her at this point, and she could get to eye level with him when he was hunched over by raising up on her hind legs. Still, she could feel the aura of magic around him, and knew to show the proper respect. "Mr. Guru, sir-"

He interrupted by laying one hand on her head. Guru will suffice, young mystic, he offered, his voice sounding clearly in her mind. I neither require nor desire appellation beyond that.

Coco nodded slowly. Focusing her thought, she attempted to communicate back the same way. CocO. pLeaSE meet... She quickly stopped herself.

It is impressive you are able to send your thought even that clearly through the Dreamtime without training, Guru responded, a wide smile on his face. Even more so that you are so receptive. Patience young mystic. I will work enchantments upon you to protect you from the rage of the Earth, and when the land is calmed and purified I will teach you what you can learn. My other student spoke of you often during his training, and now I see why. You are truly as gifted as he suggested. When your training is done, you need not fear the primal magic of this land.

Coco's grin split her face. Thank...you... she managed to send clearly, which only made Guru's grin widen even further.

Gathering: Take 6

The first thing Guru decided was necessary was teaching me how to handle the energies of both the Outback and the Dreamtime Spirits. This was both incredibly simple and unbelievably complex at the same time. However, if I was to be able to accompany everyone on further missions here, it was vital...

First, enter deep meditation, Guru instructed silently as the pair sat together just outside the hideout. He had already created a circle of his own energy upon the earth that protected Coco from the swirling energies of the land that threatened to overwhelm her with every step. I sense you have already received instruction in this.

Coco nodded. Rather than try to force words through the connection, she simply shaped her memories of her instruction under Mrs. Ruby.

Ah, a voodoo priestess, Guru mused calmly. The skills she taught you will serve you well in understanding the magic of this land, and of the Dreamtime Spirits. I am aware of how voodoo teaches, and can build from there. Your lessons were to feel the power of your environment, follow its paths until you understood the forces that shaped them, and then leach from them what you needed without damaging those forces or the environment. My teachings begin the same way, but there is a fundamental difference.

Her teachings only work in an environment where the energies are quiescent. However, this land's magic and the Dreamtime Spirits are mischievous at the best of times, outright hostile at the worst. The first steps - of feeling the power and following the paths - will apply here. However, you will then need to understand the will behind the forces, and the emotions that drive them...and above all else, earn their trust. This is an experience that is different for every practitioner, but is always physically and emotionally intense. Thus, before you make the attempt, you need to find absolute peace within yourself, or as close to it as you can manage.

Coco nodded, taking slow, deep breaths as she gathered all her magic within herself, focusing it down until it was a single point within her body, bound up in the eye of the needle in her mind. To push herself further, she heightened her focus and brought it all into the single point of thread currently passing through the eye of the needle.

Hold that, Guru instructed gently. It will help you endure. I wouldn't normally recommend attempting this while the Earth was wounded, or while the Mask of Dark Earth were active...but we don't have a choice here. The Mask of Dark Earth must be pacified and laid back to rest, and it will not rest as long as it senses your power. The Mask of Dark Earth is Darkness, Destruction, and Death, and it is filled with ancient rage. You have used your magic to destroy, to cast someone into darkness, have wielded the power of Death...and done so in rage. The Mask will actively seek you out, no matter how you try to hide. The surge of feeling you experienced when you first put hoof to Earth here...the Mask felt that. You must be ready for when - not if - it finds you.

Coco nodded slowly, nervously. "I...I understand," she murmured worriedly.

Fear not, I have taken precautions, Guru offered gently. I have enchanted small totems that I have given to your family members, which will be powered by the familial love they share with you. They have positioned themselves a certain distance away in a triangle at different heights, leaving my position here in the circle as a fourth point. Once I dispel this protective circle, it will create an enclosed space, limiting how much of the Earth's magic and the power of Dreamtime you are exposed to. Once you have adjusted to this much, you will be able to move about to help hunt down the Mask and cleanse, appease, and inter it anew.

Coco nodded, focusing her mind. "I...I'm ready..."

Guru sighed sadly. No...you are not.

The circle faded.

Coco vaguely felt her head rock back and her body convulse, but the sensation almost didn't register in her mind. The rage, pain, and corruption of the Earth lashed her body, blazing through her blood and soul in overwhelming waves. She thought she screamed, but she couldn't be certain. She felt the Spirits tearing at her mind, as though trying to devour her. She struggled, desperately trying to hold onto herself as she was swamped by sensation, but the harder she fought the more agonizing it became. Some part of her tried to call out to Guru to make it stop, but she wasn't sure it was even heard.

As she felt herself starting to sink into the morass of sensations, she realized there was no way she could overcome this. She couldn't even feel her body anymore, and she was rapidly losing her sense of her mind. Lost, alone, and desperately afraid, she did the only thing she could think to do.

She let go.

She stopped pushing against the waves of rage and pain and instead let herself go spiritually limp before it, let it carry her where it would. She felt her mind swirl around, smashing against walls of something before swirling back. As she swirled around, the voice of the Earth, of the Spirits, became clearer. They were angry at the desecration, the violation...but the rage went deeper. Something long ago had gone wrong, and everything that had happened since was a direct result of that wrongness. The balance was off, and the land desired correction, but no guru or sage who had arisen in the lands had possessed the knowledge or skill to achieve it...and with every failure the rage had grown.

Sinking into the morass, she began to understand the currents. How it lashed, how it swirled, how it eddied...she moved with it, following it around until she found her way back to herself. As she did, she slipped back inside, and felt her body as the voices of Earth and Spirits subsided. She was not the focus of their rage, and thus they had no reason to harm her. As all before her...she had one chance.

She opened her eyes, blinking away something wet and red before her entire body convulsed. She barely managed to roll on her side before she began to evacuate her stomach.

I did not expect it to be that intense, Guru offered worriedly as he gently stabilized her. Though you definitely should not have eaten before attempting it. That I did expect.

Coco barely managed to get to her hooves, trying to reach up to wipe her muzzle. Before she could, Guru had held a cloth to her face...wiping away a distressing amount of her own blood.

Even as she felt the protective separation fade and the power that had accepted her - however temporarily - shielded her as it acclimated to that which it had been separated from, she decided firmly, Not doing that again anytime soon.

I certainly wouldn't recommend it, Guru agreed.

Yeah. Not fun.

Gathering: Take 7

Once I'd fully recovered from adapting to Australia's magic, we could begin the rest of our plan. Uncle Bentley had a few ideas for driving out the miners and dealing with the Mask of Dark Earth...but I could already tell that attempts regarding the latter would only work for cornering the Mask. I would need to deal with it directly.

The first task was to address the miner's lemonade bar, their favorite - and only - hangout. Uncle Bentley's plan was to take over it and drive the miners out. But I had a better idea...

"So we want to make the miners unwilling to mine here, right?" Coco asked curiously as Bentley brought up the plan to take over the lemonade bar.

"That's the idea," Bentley confirmed.

"Would you say the miners are the superstitious sort?" Coco inquired thoughtfully.

Considering how eagerly they imprisoned me, I would say so, Guru observed, though only Coco heard the clear message.

"So what if we played on that?" Coco pushed. "Instead of making them upset, make them scared. How would they handle it if the Earth itself seemed to turn against them? Say...an earthquake destroying their lemonade bar when there aren't any fault lines in Australia?"

Everyone grew thoughtful at that. "Can you manage that?" Sly asked worriedly. "You only just managed to adapt to the local powers so they didn't overwhelm you. That level of control-"

"Not control," Coco corrected. "Gentle guidance. The earth is angry that the miners are corrupting it. If I lay the right charms down so the earth knows where to take out its anger on the right sources..."

Coco smiled softly as she finished shaping the charms in the ground around the lemonade bar. Finding a quiet spot, she slipped into meditation and pushed her power into the charms, calling the earth's anger, gently beckoning it to those who had angered it.

The ground shook. A crack raced along the solid stone under the bar, ripping the building in half. The shakes grew worse as those inside fled in fear. The earth yawned open, and the bar collapsed inward into the gaping chasm, only to be crushed as it snapped shut. The rumbling slowed and ceased. The former patrons fled, screaming in terror that the earth had eaten their bar.

Worked like a charm. Guru was impressed!

Between Guru being inexplicably freed and his gear not where the miners left it, fear was at an all time high. One more point of the environment turning against them would send them running...and Uncle Murray accomplished that by enlisting some local gators and crocodiles to actively hunt the miners. I wasn't told what method he accomplished this by, as he did it while I was sinking the lemonade bar.

Dad and Uncle Murray retrieved some uranium rich oil from the oil fields as a means of dealing with the Mask. I'm not sure what Uncle Bentley expected it to do, as we never got the chance to use it. Before we managed to enact the plan to destroy the Mask of Dark Earth, Mom showed up with her backup to round up the terrified miners...and something really bad happened.

As the Cooper Gang moved to reunite with Carmelita upon her arrival, they heard a sudden frenzied roar. Before their very eyes, Carmelita seemed to swell into immensity, the Mask of Dark Earth affixed to her face and glowing brightly.

The Mask is filled with and feeds on rage, Guru observed worriedly as the group backed up. Somewhere inside her must be an intense fury unlike any other-

"Seft!" Carmelita roared out, punching a nearby mesa and collapsing the pillar of stone. "I won't let you hurt my little girl! Where are you Seft?"

...that'd do it, Guru observed.

"She must have seen some scorpions around," Sly murmured worriedly. "How do we get it off her?"

"The Mask is only held on by two hooks!" Murray called out, pointing up at Carmelita's head. "Maybe you could climb up her and unhook them?"

You must hurry! Guru insisted. With how much rage it has brought out, the longer the Mask remains on her, the harder it will be for her soul to recover-wait!

Coco had heard enough, and raced straight at Carmelita. Sly matched her pace for pace, each of them climbing up either side of Carmelita's boots by the laces before continuing up the seams of her pants, now wide enough to grip like a pole. They then hopped up the buttons of her jacket like climbing hooks before latching onto the hooks at either side of the Mask. As expected, Carmelita lifted her arms to try and knock them off, causing the Mask to come free and letting Carmelita shrink back to normal, slipping into unconsciousness. However, before anyone could react, the Mask shrank down and affixed itself to Coco's face.

"Coco!" Sly screamed out worriedly as they fell.

Coco barely heard him. The fierceness of the Mask's wrath made the initial adjustment to Outback magic feel tame by comparison. As she landed hard on the ground, the agony became excruciating...but she steeled herself in her mind and dove through the eddies, trying to get past the wrath to the source of it. Death, Darkness, Destruction...why was there so much wrath bound up in it? What did it want?

Brother!

That agonized mental cry struck her like a blow, knocking her through the eddies of wrath. Shaking herself mentally and husbanding her strength, she pushed inward. Once she reached the point she'd heard the cry, she approached slowly.

Brother!

The cry came again, just as forcefully...but because she was ready for it, she received more than just the word in the impression. Two sages, a mask, a girl, a staff...

The staff. Something about that locked on her attention. Mrs. Ruby had taught her everything in magic desired balance...

Managing to claw her way back to awareness of her surroundings, she drew on as much magic as she could manage. She'd only get one chance at this, and if she was wrong it would probably kill her...and everyone around her. I just have to hope I'm right... she thought silently as she took her cane and slammed it into the ground.

The ground split, and a plume of magma erupted from the deep hole she'd driven in that single, magic-enhanced blow. Wrapping her foreleg in her magic, she plunged it into the magma. The heat was still excruciating, but she wasn't burned. Reaching through the magma, she called on long dead trees to rise from their graves, to make their blood her armor.

The magma was joined by a spear of amber that shot out of the ground, wrapping around each other as the magma partially melted the amber and the amber cooled the magma. Seizing the mix, Coco pulled a solid staff from the swirling mystic power, a staff of amber and obsidian.

It wasn't complete. There was something missing. She vaguely heard Guru calling, the Moon appearing in her mind...

Desperately, she held the staff upward as the clouds parted to reveal the full moon. Lifting her hoof to the moon, she visualized the light coalescing there, and was surprised to see it happen. Touching the top of the staff, she drew the Cooper hook in moonlight, seeing it crystallize into metal. As her strength started to fail her, she touched the hook to the Mask.

...the rage slowed...

...brother...

...brother...

...and stilled.

Coco stared up through the mask at the staff. "...I dun wanna be a mage no more, Daddy..." she murmured before slumping into unconsciousness.

Gathering: Take 8

Coco stirred slowly, feeling herself floating somewhere. She couldn't get her eyes open, but had the sense that she was somewhere between darkness and moonlight. Part of her mind said that wasn't logical, but she had a real hard time getting that part of her mind to work right just now. In point of fact, she was having a real hard time getting any part of her mind to work right. She started to struggle to make mind and body work...then gave up. Dreamtime magic worked better when she didn't fight, right? So she wouldn't fight. She'd just float...

There you are, Guru's voice echoed gently around her. I've been looking for you.

You have? Coco thought back curiously. I didn't know I was lost...

You were, Guru confirmed. Lost between physicality and Dreamtime. What you did was very dangerous, very reckless, and bordering on the clinically insane for you to attempt, you realize that right?

But...it was the right thing to do, wasn't it? Coco asked hopefully.

Guru sighed softly. Very much so. As angry as I am with how reckless it was of you to attempt...I'm very proud of you for succeeding.

That's good, Coco agreed happily, if somewhat listlessly. Umm...do you think you could tell me what, exactly, I did?

Silence greeted her. You...you don't recall? Guru asked worriedly.

I remember making something magical, to balance the Mask, Coco responded uncertainly. I...have no idea what that was about, or why I did it exactly. There was...a lot going on I was only barely following...

Guru chuckled softly. I admit, before you succeeded I had no idea what you were doing. Once the artifact was completed, however, the true history of the Mask of Dark Earth was given to me by the Dreamtime Spirits through my Moonstone. I take it that is the story you were hoping for?

If it's not too much trouble... Coco agreed, making a conscious effort to keep her thoughts from slurring.

Guru laughed for a time, and then his voice changed. It echoed through the...wherever Coco was right now, becoming sound. "In the ancient times, the magic of this land was in perfect balance. The Shining Light was balanced by the Suffocating Dark. Life was balanced by Death. Creation was balanced by Destruction. And this balance was maintained by two artifacts. The Mask of Dark Earth embodied and guided the powers of Darkness, Destruction, and Death. The Staff of Moonfire embodied and guided the powers of Light, Creation, and Life.

"The peoples who lived here in those times lived in harmony with nature, and with those magics. As they came to understand and use the magics, they revered the two artifacts and the powers they represented. To ensure such powers were never misused or fell into the wrong hands, twin shamans of each generation were selected to bear the artifacts, marked from birth with an affinity for one or the other. This went on for many turnings of the seasons, and all was well.

"But then came the Time of Sundering. The Twin Shamans of Earth and Moon had come of age to court, and a woman had caught the eyes of both brothers. In times past when this had happened, the woman would choose one or the other, and that would be the end of it. But this time, the woman claimed she could not choose. So equal were the two, she declared, that she knew not which she would desire to have as a mate. In truth, she merely enjoyed having men fight over her, and she had been banished from several clans for the chaos she sowed from this predilection. However, the brothers were unaware of this, and began to compete for her affections.

"However, the woman's words had a seed of truth to them. The twins were as alike as could be, and were true equals to each other. This had made the balance between the artifacts as perfect as they had ever been...and made it impossible to prove one brother superior to the other through physical expression. Bitterness was planted between the brothers, and it bloomed and grew into a bitter crop as it finally boiled over into a Shaman Duel over the woman.

"The duel caused a great deal of damage to the land. Green plains became arid, forests became swamps, and plateaus erupted out of flat lands. Still, the people hoped for a peaceful outcome, for once the Duel was over the two Shamans could easily restore the land. But then the unthinkable happened. In order to overset his brother, the Earth Shaman turned the Mask's power of Destruction...against the Staff of Moonfire.

"The Staff shattered.

"The eruption of magical energies permanently scarred the land...and slew the Moon Shaman. Realizing he had slain his brother over the woman, the Earth Shaman's grief turned into rage, rage which imbued itself into the Mask and tore at the very fabric of the land's magic...dividing it between Living World and Dreamtime. Unable to wield the Mask anymore, the Shaman cast it aside.

"The people made a decision. The Shaman was stripped of his rank, and cursed so that he and all his descendants could not leave this land until the Mask was balanced...whether through finding a way to recreate the Staff, or through destroying the Mask and ending the land's magic for good. To ensure he would have descendants, the former Shaman was cursed with that which he had fought for, and was bound to the woman, who proved to be as ugly inside as she was beautiful on the outside.

"Generation followed generation...and the tale was lost. All that was known was that the Mask must be contained. After a time, the legends of the battle between the Shamans turned into a tale of the Mask battling the Moon Spirit...and the descendants of the Earth Shaman took up the Moonstone in an attempt to keep the Mask's power contained...which only increased its wrath.

"The wrath of the Mask shaped the magic of the land, and its creatures. Thus does Death walk in everything in this land, seeking vengeance for its brother."

As the tale ended, Guru's voice returned to normal. I am the last descendant of the Earth Shaman. I can never repay the debt my ancestors owe to you, for restoring our brother.

Does this mean...you're going to take the Mask back? Coco asked hopefully.

No, neither Mask nor Staff will bow to me, Guru replied. But worry not. Most of the magic of both infuses the land directly, restoring the balance and repairing the damage people have inflicted. What remains in them will - when used together - act as amplifiers for your existing magic, and allow you to perceive the flow of magic around you. They have chosen you, and will go with you wherever you do.

...oh joy... Coco observed acerbically, startling laughter from Guru.

Gathering: Take 9

It should be pretty obvious that it took me a while to recover from creating the staff. During that time, Uncle Murray and Guru kept me isolated to prevent anything from 'disturbing my spirit's link to my body'. Even once I was able to move about and tap my magic again, I was under strict orders to limit my activities for at least a week. Thankfully, I was given more than enough time to recover enough to go with everyone once we determined where we were going next.

While I was recovering, Dad and Mom did little but worry frenetically over me, especially since they weren't allowed near me until I was moving under my own power...after which they both had to be reminded that moving was part of my recovery and to put me down already. That's also when I learned that Uncle Bentley had spent the entire time figuring out what skill set we needed to complete our assault on the Cooper Vault. He'd determined we needed a RC specialist, and he had a candidate in mind. When I learned who...okay, I admit I got a little overly-giddy. Uncle Bentley had an online girlfriend!

Okay, maybe 'girlfriend' was a bit strong...but he was obviously sweet on her the way he talked about his chats with her, and the logs seemed to indicate she was at least friendly towards him. Of course, much like with Guru, we needed to prove ourselves before she'd work for us...and Dad concluded that meant beating her current boss - an aerial dogfight champ known only as the Black Baron - at his own game...specifically, the ACES dogfight competition.

Which left me curious. Why would someone specializing in piloting skills and RC vehicles work for someone who apparently flew and had RC backup? Did she control his backup? Or... I discarded that particular suspicion for the moment, deciding to see what would happen. In the meantime, once a plane was ready - and I was fully recovered by then - we made our way to Holland, both to get better contact with this Penelope and to see what the Black Baron was like, and up to...

As the group arrived in Kinderdijk, Holland, the rain was pouring down in fierce torrents. Sly immediately tucked Coco into his flight jacket to keep her from getting wet or catching a chill, while Deik-Beck sprouted a rain shield of his own with a beep before racing along behind everyone as the group made their way to the hideout they'd prepared, separate from the hangar their plane was stored in. Once they were all settled in and dry, Sly and Coco went out in matching flight jackets to see if they could locate the flight roster to find out who they were up against. Since Sly needed to keep his Flight Jacket on - which limited his maneuverability somewhat - it was decided having the pair go together would make things easier, as Coco could act as an adorable distraction while Sly got hold of the roster...or Sly could act as a 'worried father' distraction while Coco 'took a wrong turn' to get the roster, whichever method proved successful.

"So...the roster is kept a secret to prevent any attempts at sabotage," Coco reminded herself aloud. "Which is...exactly what we plan to do?"

"More or less," Sly murmured back softly as they walked. "We've only got the one plane, so we can't take any chances."

"Don't know how well that'll do impressing Penelope," Coco murmured thoughtfully. "Maybe we'd be better off trying to befriend one of the other competitors with spare planes and borrow a few."

"And what are the odds that could happen?" Sly asked dismissively.

At that moment, the Black Baron himself entered the foyer to make an announcement to the gathered pilots. To Sly and Coco's surprise, he was...surprisingly short for his reputation, shorter than Sly even, and lacking any distinguishing characteristics beyond an oversized mustache. Coco felt a suspicion niggle at her mind, only for it to be banished as she focused on the speech now that it had begun.

"I bid you all a most flamboyant welcome, my esteemed comrades of the skies," he declared in a deep, sonorous voice. "Welcome, welcome, to another year of the ACES competition. We've got teams here from across the globe: Canada, Belgium, Ecuador, Iceland, Korea and many, many more! Not the least of which is last year's deadly runner-up, Team Muggshot!"

To Sly's shock and Coco's delighted surprise, Muggshot himself leaned over the railing of the upper floor in a brown flight jacket and cap to give his own two cents. "This time I'm gonna drill you jokers fulla holes! I got too much ridin' on this year ta fail!"

"Now," the Black Baron continued, "we all know that in years past, some teams have engaged in a little good-natured late night hi-jinx."

"Like when Team Ecuador stole Team Canada's parachutes!" one of the listeners shouted out.

"Or when Team Iceland sawed the landing gear off Korea's planes!" another added.

"Or when Portugal put rat poison in Team Muggshot's coffee machine!" a third declared.

"Yes, yes," the Baron allowed jovially, "that was all so very funny. But no more! You know the rules, no one, absolutely no one is to leave the hotel after sunset. If my guards catch you outside, you will be beaten to within an inch of your life. No exceptions! This will be a fair competition!"

"Same as last year and the year before!" someone called out to amused laughter. "I've got the scars to prove it!"

"I bid you all an exuberant and exaggerated farewell pilots," the Baron concluded. "Tonight, sleep like geese, and tomorrow, soar like eagles...high!"

As the Baron left, Coco looked up at Muggshot, then turned back to Sly with a wide grin. Sly groaned, burying his face in one hand. "Fine," he allowed grumpily. "Go ahead and see if you can sweet talk a few planes out of him."

Grinning, Coco quickly raced up the stairs towards where she'd seen Muggshot, only for his massive hands to yank her off the floor and into an alcove. "You really think some disguise can hide your features, little lady?" he teased, rubbing her under her chin affectionately.

Coco got out a few giggles before struggling free. "Hey Muggshot!" she greeted warmly. "What are you doing here? I thought you'd be in the states with Mrs. Ruby and Felicia?"

To Coco's surprise, Muggshot visibly flinched at the mention of his daughter, though he played it off quickly. "Ah, Ruby's startin' Feli's magic trainin'," he offered unconvincingly. "I'd just be in the way. Sides, the prize money here will pay - legitimately - for her college fund."

Coco felt her ears go flat against her skull. "Oh...well...uh..."

"Go on then, spit it out," Muggshot insisted. "The worst I can say is no."

"Well, we need to beat the Black Baron so Penelope - a pilot and RC specialist that works for him - will help us break into the Cooper Vault," Coco explained. "Beyond that...I'm trying to set Uncle Bentley up with her. They seem sweet on each other online. I...was hoping I could borrow a few planes from you. We've only got the one, and otherwise we'll need to...well, use other means to be sure of victory."

Muggshot frowned, stroking his chin thoughtfully and murmuring under his breath. Even with her stronger hearing, Coco only just barely caught "...surer thing than hoping on an unknown..." before finally nodding. "Alright. I'll give ya a spare plane and help ya win however I can...but you and yer Gang gotta do somethin' for me."

"Of course!" Coco agreed. "What do you need?"

"As soon as the contest ends - and I do mean immediately - ya head over ta St. Canard," he explained. "Ruby's got...a little somethin' she could use some help with there. Ah help ya here, you help her there. Deal?"

"Deal!" Coco agreed immediately. "Is there anything-"

"Ruby'll tell ya when ya get there," Muggshot interrupted. "Just...don't tell her I threw the contest ta help ya, okay?"

"Promise," Coco offered eagerly. "I need to get back to Dad now."

"I'll get the spare plane over to your hangar," Muggshot agreed, setting her down as they went their separate ways.

While I was 'sweet talking' Muggshot, Deik-Beck was able to hack the Baron's security and learn where the flight roster was kept - since it wasn't kept anywhere online - and Dad and Uncle Bentley went and retrieved it. While I didn't like that we would still be relying on sabotage, two planes wasn't that much an improvement on one. Muggshot's help would probably do more for us than the extra plane.

Gathering: Take 10

Even with two planes, the odds were simply too much against us. Our first match had us against Teams Iceland and Belgium, who had 15 planes a piece, plus spares they wouldn't be allowed to field. Apparently, there were limits on how many planes teams could field in each match, to keep richer teams form simply overwhelming everyone else by fielding more planes, thus keeping it a match of skill. Still, 30 to 2 was not good odds, even if the other two teams were unlikely to team up.

Instead, our plan was to make it seem as though the two teams had, in essence, pranked each other. Vandalizing - not sabotaging, but vandalizing - one of Team Belgium's planes while leaving a Team Iceland viking helmet behind, and stealing Team Iceland's ice sculpture while leaving behind a monogrammed Team Belgium handkerchief...simple enough tactics and in no way harmful to the other teams' performance...but enough to get them gunning specifically for each other, leaving us free to gain a lead in the match.

Daddy was taking care of putting Belgium at Iceland's throat. Uncle Murray and Uncle Bentley were handling the other side of it. In the meantime, Deik-Beck and I were guarding the hangar in case anyone tried anything on us, since I still wasn't 100% after Australia and this task let me stay put and conserve my strength. Uncle Bentley had designed some defense systems...and as it turned out though, I didn't need them...

Coco paced back and forth worriedly as she watched the doors, Deik-Beck plugged into security as he remotely controlled all of the traps. She'd heard through Bentley from Penelope that someone was planning mischief to the Cooper planes while they were mostly unguarded. She could only hope that the defenses would be up to the task of whatever trouble came to call.

Her worries were interrupted by the sound of a huge commotion just outside the hangar, including the sound of a heavy body being thrown against a building. Shortly after, Muggshot pushed the door open before ducking inside. "Okay if I hide out here until the guards go elsewhere?" he asked quickly.

"What happened out there?" Coco demanded worriedly.

"Some punks wanted ta make trouble," Muggshot explained. "Was over here making sure ya had a pilot for the plane I'm lending ya, saw the punks, decided ta trounce 'em. But the Baron doesn't like that sorta thing, so..."

Coco smiled happily. "Feel free to stay until things cool down," she offered warmly. "Think you could watch the sewer entrances? There might be more coming up that way, and as good as Deik-Beck is at the controls of the traps Uncle Bentley set up, they might still get past through sheer numbers."

"Leave it to me!" Muggshot declared proudly, moving to a spot between the pipes. Coco joined him there as Deik-Beck monitored the sewer passages.

As it turned out, my concerns were unfounded. Deik-Beck was more than capable of timing the defenses in both passages to ensure none even made it as far as the hangar. At the same time, he sent a distress signal to Uncle Bentley...who managed to get a face-chat with Penelope to get her help. She was happy to deal with Black Baron guards who'd accepted payoffs to break his rules, and demonstrated her mastery of the RC chopper, which impressed Uncle Bentley greatly.

An odd thought crossed my mind as I listened to the radio communications, though...especially when she talked of how 'no one sells out the Black Baron and walks off scot free. If Penelope could confirm the attacking guards were paid off, why wouldn't she inform the Baron? The way she talked, the Baron would want to deal with such betrayal personally, not delegate it. Otherwise, the Baron's rep would fail. So...why was she dealing with it and not the Baron?

Still, that line of speculation would have to be delayed. Once we knew we were safe for the night, I was put to bed immediately to sleep through till morning. Then came the time for the dogfight...

With Dad in our plane, and Mom - in disguise - flying the one Muggshot lent us.

As Sly flew through the air in his own plane, he couldn't help but marvel at Carmelita's skill in the air. The rules of the dogfight were...unique. A pilot was eliminated if they were forced to bail out of their plane or if another pilot managed to hit a bullseye on the targets painted on wings and tail. Carmelita was able to fly circles around the other pilots, conserving her ammunition and delivering those pinpoint strikes she'd first demonstrated back in Canada, forcing the pilots to land as her bullseyes were scored. Between the two of them, it almost seemed like they could have taken the two opposing teams even without siccing them on each other.

Now if only Sly could get his mind off how good Carmelita looked in that flight suit...

With that victory, we were set for the finals. This would be us against Team Muggshot and Team Black Baron. Even with Muggshot promised to help us, things were complicated. First off, the rules of the final match were that whoever took the Black Baron out of the sky was the winner. Second, any sign of collusion between our teams - of Muggshot trying to throw the match in our favor - would get both teams disqualified. Not only that, the Baron had a massive team of pilots under his command, and wasn't above using other dirty tricks such as calling in attacks from support blimps if it looked like he'd be taken out. It seemed it would be tricky...

Surprisingly enough, it was Muggshot himself who came up with a solution. He threw down a special challenge that caught everyone off guard. As he put it, the ACES competition was about determining the Captain of the Skies...so he issued a challenge between the Team Captains to determine the true Captain of the Skies. If the Black Baron accepted, it would mean the final match would be the Baron, Muggshot, Dad...and no one else.

...the Black Baron agreed.

Gathering: Take 11

Although it was agreed to be a fair fight between three planes and pilots determined solely by skill, there was still a rather large difference in terms of planes themselves. Muggshot's plane was much larger, mostly due to the fact that it had to carry his weight. The Baron's plane also had stronger engines, and RC guns that could shoot in more directions than just straight forward. Dad's plane was the standard model, though. This was going to be a tough fight for him, especially since - by the rules - Muggshot would have to be shooting for him as well...

Sly jerked the controls as he sent his plane into a dive. The Black Baron was fiendishly clever in the air. Rather than focus on one of them or the other to take them down, he kept his distance and waited until Sly or Muggshot started shooting at each other before focusing on whoever was in pursuit, and using a strafing sweep to hit both of them. As a result, both Sly and Muggshot's planes had taken some significant damage, while the Baron's plane had barely taken any.

"Give up you fools!" the Baron declared proudly as he swooped in, ready for another strafe to take them down as Muggshot brought his heavier plane down and Sly climbed into the air to try and get some distance. "I am supreme in the air! It was your mistake to give me no targets but yourselves in the air! In a faceoff, I am unstoppable! You will never take me out of the sky!"

"I wouldn't be so sure of that," Sly growled as he flipped his plane over before going into a dive. "I'm not trying to win. I just have to take you out of the air."

"And how do you intend to do that," the Baron began as his guns went off, taking out Sly's own as well as his engine, "when you have no weapons left?"

"That's where you're wrong," Sly argued as he shifted the course of his plane. "I have one weapon left." With that said, he leapt out of the crashing plane, using his para-glider to coast slowly for a landing.

Chuckling, the Black Baron turned towards Muggshot below...only for his motion sensors to go off, leading to him bailing out of his plane just before Sly's crashed into it, taking both planes out of the air. The Baron landed heavily on Muggshot's plane wing as Sly landed lightly on the other one. "You haven't won yet, raccoon!" the Baron declared angrily. "You may have destroyed my plane with your own - a clever strategy, I must admit - but as you can see, we are all still airborne! There is still no victor, and you have placed yourself at your opponent's mercy!" He clicked his heels together, causing his boots to affix to the metal wing magnetically. "All he need do is roll the plane, and you will go flying to your doom!"

"And leave you here to toss me out and take my plane?" Muggshot groused. "Even if the flaps weren't locked from your heavy landing meaning all I can do is glide slowly down in a circle, I wouldn't do that!"

"I guess we can consider Muggshot out of the running, if he can't do anything but keep us level," Sly deduced as he leveled his cane. "So if it's between us, let's settle it."

"Beware, m'boy," the Baron warned. "I've trained ten years at pugilism. Fisticuffs is my passion!"

"In that case, this should actually be fun," Sly quipped back, spinning his cane aggressively.

As the Baron charged forward to punch, Sly ducked under the strike, jabbing forward with the base of his cane into his opponent's belly even as he spun it to catch the Baron's lead foot in the hook, pulling him off his feet. The Baron rolled away from the trip, coming back to his feet as he ducked under a sweeping strike to deliver a quick flurry of punches aimed at Sly's ribs. Sly backed away, spinning his cane in front of him to deflect the blows that hadn't already connected. Growling, he stuck the base of the cane into the wing before flinging himself forward in a flying kick, striking the Baron in the head.

To Sly's surprise, the strike of foot to helmet made a hollow 'clonk', as though there were empty space beneath the helmet before it reached the head inside. As the Baron staggered and righted himself, Sly raced around him to strike lightly with the base of his cane at the helmet, sounding out the interior. As the Baron turned to charge, Sly leapt over him, his hook coming down to catch under the helmet before jerking it off, sending it flying.

Smoke and sparks poured out of the Baron's neck as Penelope coughed, the Baron's hands coming up to wipe her glasses. "Okay, okay, I give!" she gasped out before coughing a few more times. "Geeze, I should have known better than to think this thing was up to hand-to-hand with a Cooper, even in midair..."

Sly's eyes widened as he recognized the voice, having not actually seen Penelope before. "Penelope? I thought you were the Baron's mechanic!"

"Can we talk on the ground where it's safer?" Penelope pleaded. "The suit's starting to fall apart as it is."

"I'll take us down," Muggshot offered, immediately turning the plane to a landing vector.

"You said you couldn't do anything but fly in circles!" Penelope complained angrily.

"And I couldn't!" Muggshot countered. "If I did anything else, Sly couldn't beat the Baron."

"You colluded!" Penelope snapped angrily.

"Can't prove it from anything inside the match," Sly pointed out teasingly.

Penelope ground her teeth for a time, then sighed. "I guess you did win, anyway..."

Once everyone was on the ground, Penelope caused her Baron Suit to unfold, stepping out as everyone got a good look at the real her...which was much different from the picture she'd used as her online photo. She was actually a slim figured mouse girl with pink fur, brown eyes, and blonde hair, somewhat shorter than Sly. She wore an orange shirt, blue work coveralls, grey gloves, a red kerchief to hold her hair out of range of machinery, a tight band to keep the rest of the long hair in a ponytail, and thick glasses. "Sorry about all that," she explained, her rather cute voice showing she was younger than she'd seemed before. "The ACES competition was about to start when you first sent me the message, and The Black Baron couldn't exactly bow out. But now that you're the champion Sly, I can put this suit to rest. I only made it because five years ago when I wanted in on aerial dogfighting, I was too young for the age requirements. You have to be 18 minimum to compete, and I only just turned 20 this year. Of course, once I was champion, I couldn't exactly stop...and it was honestly kind of fun, having all that respect and admiration." She sighed as she leaned back, glancing around at those around the table. "I'm glad to be out of it, but...well, look at me!" She gestured to her - at least in her eyes - rather understated figure. "Who's going to be looking at this with almost worshipful admiration?" She glanced enviously towards Carmelita.

"Perhaps the one right across from you?" Carmelita suggested, pointing to where Bentley quickly jerked his face away, blushing brightly and twiddling his thumbs. Penelope's ears - which had been falling flat against the side of her head to the point her glasses started to slip as she talked herself down - perked up in surprised interest. "I know he may not look like much himself, but he's certainly carrying a torch for you...and he'll literally move heaven and earth for those he cares for." She chuckled softly as Penelope's cheeks colored. When did I become Den Mother to these overgrown teenagers? she thought silently to herself.

Coco giggled as she nuzzled her mother's hand, making the officer smile down at her.

"So you'll be joining us for this job, then?" Sly asked Penelope curiously.

"Once I know a bit more about it," Penelope countered aggressively. "I'm not going in blind."

"Once we've finished recruiting everyone we'll need, we'll be breaking into the Cooper Vault," Coco explained, "where all the treasures the Cooper Clan has ever stolen are stored."

Penelope's eyes lit up. "Now that sounds like the job of all time!" she purred happily. "I'm in."

"Next stop, St. Canard!" Coco declared eagerly. As all eyes turned to her, she smiled. "I promised Muggshot we'd go there next to help Mrs. Ruby with something in exchange for his help winning here."

"I can give you all a lift!" Penelope offered. "I've got just the plane for it."

Gathering: Take 12

Penelope's plane proved to be perfect to transport us all to St. Canard. Not only was it roomy enough for us all to sit comfortably, its pitch black aerodynamic design let us slip across borders and into the 'Capital of Crime' with no one the wiser. Once we found a safe place to land and take off from, we used the plane itself as our hideout - properly concealed beneath a large circus tent just outside an actual (if closed) circus - before we began our investigations into what was going on.

Despite all the descriptions of St. Canard as being such a dangerous city and home to so many villains, it's surprisingly mundane at first glance. The buildings are like buildings in any city, with houses and office buildings with restaurants and grocery stores interspersed, and various other city staples...and all the banks and other 'find loot here' locations all the criminals hit. To be perfectly honest, I had to keep reminding myself where I was to keep from getting sloppy while giving the place a cursory look over before we began our full investigation.

Our first step was to find Mrs. Ruby, so we could learn what she needed help with. That proved to be difficult, not only because we didn't know where to begin looking, but the one idea we had to find her for certain...simply didn't work.

Coco sat in meditation, Mask of Dark Earth on her face and Staff of Moonfire in her hooves. She glowed with the power of the Dreamtime as she slipped out of her body, sending passive pulses of her own magical energy across the city like sonar. No one would notice the energy hitting them unless they were powerful mages in their own right and were actively looking, had a natural affinity for Earth magic, or knew her magical wavelength. So Mrs. Ruby might notice, but hopefully no one else would. If she did notice, she could get in contact with them. If she didn't notice, then Coco would locate her.

At least, that had been the plan. Unfortunately, when the waves came back, Coco was surprised to see in her mind's eye lights all over the city representing those with power that could be defined as magical. As the imagery began to overload her senses, she slipped out of the Dreamtime to focus her mind back into reality, and move back into her body.

"So how did it go?" Sly asked hopefully as Coco opened her eyes.

"Not well," Coco answered apologetically. "I got too many signals. I count...at least four powerful natural magi, more Gifted, dozens of Talents, and far too many Touched."

"...come again?" Carmelita asked in confusion.

Coco flushed in embarrassment. "Sorry. Terminology Mrs. Ruby and Guru taught me. Magi are those who are naturally attuned to command a wide variety of magic. Gifted are those who aren't naturally magical, but have become attuned to magic through training. Talents are those who are naturally magical but can only do one or two certain things with their magic. Touched are like Talents, but didn't get that way naturally."

"Considering how many superheros and supervillains are known to be based in St. Canard, I suppose we should have expected that," Bentley allowed. "That sounds exactly like origin stories for all sorts of supers."

"But wasn't the other side of the plan Mrs. Ruby noticing you sounding?" Murray asked hopefully.

With so many other signals, it is unlikely she received a clear signal, Guru offered, only Coco getting the clear, undiluted message while the others got the sense of it. Unless she was actively hoping to feel Coco's magic, she likely assumed it was one of the other Magi in the city.

"So what do we do, then?" Carmelita asked worriedly. "I can't assist here. St. Canard is S.H.U.S.H. territory. If they caught an Interpol agent running around, there'd be hell to pay with inter-agency politics."

"I guess that means it's time to do more footwork," Sly offered ruefully, getting to his feet. "Coco, you stay here with everyone else. If there's that much magic power here, we don't want to draw attention like what happened in Prague."

"Da~ad!" Coco whined. "I only made an army of rage-fueled dark magic golems once!"

Wait, you did what? Guru asked in shock.

"That was you?" Penelope gasped in amazement.

"Once was enough, Coco," Sly insisted. "Those things were terrifying."

"You were all in prison," Coco complained. "What was I supposed to do? I had to get you out of there fast."

"Why was speed so important?" Murray asked curiously. "I get that you missed us-"

"It was a co-ed prison, and I'd already heard from Mrs. Ruby that the Contessa dabbled in hypnosis officially," Coco explained. "I'd seen enough of Uncle Bentley's Hentai to know what was going to happen if you stayed in there too long."

"BENTLEY!" Sly, Murray, and Carmelita all roared out angrily. Penelope glanced at him with a raised eyebrow.

"...god dammit, Coco..." Bentley whimpered as he pulled his head into his shell.

After Dad finished yelling at Uncle Bentley, he went off to investigate the city. Uncle Murray cooled down pretty quick - he's been careful about his anger ever since he recovered from the spice overdose, something Guru's training helped him with - but Mom wasn't disposed to let it go so easily. Thankfully, Penelope managed to convince Mom that letting Uncle Bentley hack local networks was more important than yelling at him about not hiding his porn better. Once Mom had calmed down and Uncle Bentley was hacking...Penelope took me aside and asked if I remembered any specific titles from what I'd seen of Uncle Bentley's files.

Guru said she was kinky. I don't know why. Her tail looked straight to me.

It wasn't long before Dad and Uncle Bentley both had a report. Apparently, the major event happening in St. Canard was some sort of battle for magical dominance between two witches, Morgana Macawber and Magica De Spell. Apparently it wasn't the first time they'd clashed, and Morgana had come out on top the last time. This time, however, Magica had somehow enlisted some heavy duty help to overwhelm Morgana...

...Mrs. Ruby.

Gathering: Take 13

This is where things got complicated. See, we didn't have any actual opinion in who won a magic duel in St. Canard. We had no interests in the city, since it more or less regulated itself. We normally would have no compunction against going and offering our services to whoever Mrs. Ruby was working for so we could help her like we'd promised Muggshot. However, the name Magica De Spell wasn't unknown to us. She was a frequent thorn in the side of Scrooge McDuck...and word of us assisting her in her endeavors making its way back to Duckberg could conceivably skew relations with Uncle Scrooge, and that was the last thing we wanted.

The other issue of importance was that Magica was a known criminal...and more than a criminal, a 'bad guy', as Megraw had so eloquently put it. Given Muggshot and Mrs. Ruby wanting to go straight, it didn't make sense for her to be assisting Magica in this matter...or even being involved at all.

However...

As everyone began planning the next course of action, Sly noticed that Coco was unusually thoughtful. "Something bothering you, Coco?" he asked worriedly.

"Well, I was trying to figure out why Mrs. Ruby would be working for Magica De Spell," Coco explained. "It...it doesn't make sense."

"That's what we're trying to figure out," Bentley pointed out. "Unfortunately, I haven't been able to get anything from the networks. They're too compromised just now with all the magic and other traffic."

"Actually, it's something else I thought of when I was following that line of that," Coco explained. "Muggshot was alone in Holland, and he's still there. So if Mrs. Ruby has been seen in action here...where's Felicia?"

"Who?" Carmelita asked in confusion.

"Their little girl," Coco pointed out. "She's just a little kid, too young to be left on her own. Mrs. Ruby had her when we left for Australia." She turned to Sly. "I mentioned her when I passed on Mrs. Ruby's warning about Australia's magic...didn't I?"

Sly rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. "You did...but in all the excitement and confusion of what happened there and in Holland...it hadn't really come up-"

"Wait!" Penelope suddenly gasped out. "You think Magica De Spell has Mrs. Ruby's daughter, and that's why she's working for her? Is that why Muggshot kept talking about having 'command of the skies' before your team showed up? You think he wanted to beat the Black Baron and enlist his forces to lay siege to St. Canard to rescue his daughter?"

"It's as viable a theory as any," Bentley concluded. "However, we shouldn't act on it until we're certain...so Sly, Coco, your next task is to secretly infiltrate Magica De Spell's base to see if you can find out where Felicia is."

"Do we know where she's based?" Carmelita asked curiously.

"Already got it," Bentley confirmed as he showed a map of the city. "She's raised a magical volcano in the harbor. It's honeycombed with secret passages, though it'll probably be hard to maneuver-"

"Is it actual earth?" Coco asked intently. "Or pure magical construct?"

"Actual earth," Bentley explained. "Even with Mrs. Ruby helping her, Magica doesn't have the power to do that much out of pure magic."

"Then if Dad can get me onto it, I should be able to find my way through it no problem," Coco stated firmly. "Especially if I bring the Mask. Magica uses Dark Magic, after all."

Sly looked over the map. "From the looks of things, that volcano has been causing hot spots in the bay. I should be able to ride the thermals with my paraglider...maybe..."

"I have a better idea," Penelope spoke up. "I've been looking over Deik-Beck, and I think if he interfaced with one of my RC copters, he could boost its performance to the point it could carry Coco back and forth across the bay. That should be much safer."

"I want to fly!" Deik-Beck declared happily.

Coco smiled up at Penelope. "I'm ready to fly when you are."

The plan worked out perfectly. Since roof hopping would actually draw attention in St. Canard, I instead dressed myself up like a civilian and carried Penelope's RC out to the bay on my back with Deik-Beck already installed. Walking through the twisting streets was a bit difficult since I had a hard time keeping track of where I was supposed to be going, but Deik-Beck was able to quietly redirect me whenever I took a wrong turn.

Once at the bay, I donned my thief gear and the Mask of Dark Earth before letting Penelope fly me out to the magical volcano that Magica had constructed for her base. Its magical nature quickly became obvious since the stone of its construction was blood red when there wasn't any red stone anywhere in the area. As my hooves came in contact with the rock, I felt the fresh Dark magic that had shaped it, giving me an instant mental picture - filtered through the Mask - of the entire structure. At that point, the only problem was exploring the smaller tunnels until I found my way through to where I wanted to go...and that was much more difficult. Not only did the tunnels constantly twist, turn, and double back on themselves unlike natural magma tubes, there were dozens of larger chambers that could possibly be what I was looking for, and no way to tell remotely which one I wanted. Still, I pressed on...

Gathering: Take 14

Much as I'd feared when I first started exploring the tunnels, I wound up searching through the entire structure to find what I was looking for...and it wasn't even remotely safe. Not only did each large chamber have built in security, the wider passages between them were regularly patrolled. While the lackeys Magica had hired for he job (the files Uncle Scrooge had shown us identified them as 'The Beagle Boys') were easy enough to evade to the point they could almost be ignored - seriously, I actually walked an entire patrol right behind the biggest one and he never noticed me - the halls also had magical security that was a much greater concern. Not only were the magic constructs far more aware of their surroundings than the Beagle Boys, they followed the weave of the enchantments on the volcano itself. If I broke even one of them, it would set off an alarm throughout the entire structure. Thankfully, they were Dark Magic constructs designed to detect magic anomalies, and I could hide from them if I activated the Mask of Dark Earth and held perfectly still...which would unfortunately make the Beagle Boys notice me if they caught sight of me sitting there. Not. Fun.

While I didn't bother exploring any chamber unless it was the one I was looking for, I did snap numerous pictures as I went through, to get Uncle Bentley as much information as he could. The glowing red stone walls of the various chambers were uniform uneven rock, and otherwise uninteresting. I could only hope the pictures I snapped of the contents would help Uncle Bentley plan some way of assaulting the place if needed.

Finally I found what I was looking for. Magica was too clever for her own good...

The central chamber of the volcano was a straight up-and-down tower-like room that ran from the caldera opening straight down to the magma core of the volcano, where all the magic was anchored. This was the most vulnerable spot of the entire structure, since the shaping of the magic meant the magma core had to be exposed to open air far above. However, it was overlooked at dozens of levels by the paths honeycombing the structure, turning that obvious entrance into a death-trap ambush for anyone trying to get in from the top. The volcano sloped inward towards the top, making each higher overlook vulnerable to the one beneath as a single shot to the right place could send it falling outward and into the magma below. At the same time, all the overlooks on one side were plainly visible to those on the other three, and could just as easily be knocked out from there. There was no safe, direct way to assault the chamber, and trying to lead a rescue force through the tunnels would be just asking for trouble.

And down below, right next to the magma core in a cage of dark magic charged obsidian, was little Felicia...the cage's magic being the only thing protecting her from the punishing heat.

Coco thought quickly as she observed the situation. A cage charged with dark magic could easily be opened with its opposite, and she did have the Staff of Moonfire with her. If she could get Felicia safely out, the whole thing would be over. Despite being tiny for a gator-dog hybrid, she was still big enough to carry Coco on her back if the pony could get her moving. A bit of magic application to the temperature control technique she'd learned early in her career and she could protect Felicia from the heat, and then they could make their way through the smaller tunnels - too small for pursuit - to the outside. Then they could either fly out on the copter, or Felicia could swim them across the bay. Coco could already see the muscle definition in the hybrid's small frame. She could make the distance easily...and even if she couldn't, Coco recognized the shell pendant she wore. It was one Mrs. Ruby had taught Coco to make, an alarm pendant that would send a strong magical signal when exposed to water. Get Felicia in the water, and Mrs. Ruby would make a beeline to them.

It all seemed so easy...until Coco pulled out the Staff of Moonfire. No matter what she did, she couldn't get it to ignite. Damn, she thought to herself. The Dark Magic in the volcano is just too strong. I can't spark the magic within the staff. To use it, I'd have to activate it before entering, and keep it activated as I made my way through...and a Light Magic beacon like that would trigger every alarm system in here.

Putting the staff away, she turned back to Felicia. "Don't worry," she whispered just under her breath. "We'll get you out of here...somehow." Turning, she took several pictures of the area before making her way stealthily back to the outside.

Unfortunately, all the photos got us was a firm realization that as we were we could not assault the volcano or rescue Felicia. Getting into direct contact with Mrs. Ruby was also a bad idea, as she was probably under strict orders about what she was and wasn't supposed to do in order to keep Felicia safe. We were stuck for what to do.

Until Uncle Murray had a stroke of genius...

"...can I ask something?" Murray spoke up as everyone mused over what to do regarding the situation.

"Go ahead," Sly responded. "We're at our wits end."

"Well, this magic battle can't be good for civilians," he pointed out logically. "If the super-crime here is balanced out by vigilantes, how come they haven't gotten involved yet?"

Everyone turned to stare at Murray. "...Murray, you're a genius," Bentley finally stated in amazement.

"...I am?" Murray asked in shock.

"The entire city is crawling with super-powered individuals, or those who know how to deal with them," Bentley elaborated. "If we can't get through the volcano, we just need to look hard enough to find who can!" Turning, he began accessing the net rapidly. "We need someone with a good success record, with a variety of skills, a way to handle just about anything we saw in those pictures, and a willingness to put a lot on the line to save an innocent. And then we need a way to get in contact with them without arousing suspicion, and a way to convince them to help us."

"I don't know about the contacting part," Carmelita spoke up, "but from communications between Interpol and S.H.U.S.H., I know exactly who we need." All eyes turned to her, and she sighed ruefully. "It's going to be three kinds of headaches by the time this is over...but let's get dangerous..."

Gathering: Take 16

After collating all the information they had, Bentley began to lay out the plan. "Alright, here's what we have," he stated as he called up pictures Sly had taken of the city, Coco had taken of Magica's base, and he and Penelope had pulled off the net of the hero they were trying to recruit. "We need the help of this...duck, if we're going to break through Magica's defenses and free Felicia. Once Felicia is free, we just need to get her into the water, and then Mrs. Ruby will turn on Magica. Without her support, Magica will have no chance against Morgana's enchantments. That situation will then resolve itself, though our immediate concern is assisting Mrs. Ruby in rescuing her daughter."

He shifted to the photos of the hero's antics. "This 'hero', however, has a bad habit of assuming the worst of any new situation he encounters, usually thinking with his sidearm first, brain later if he gets his ass kicked or into trouble. As such, we can expect our first encounter with him to involve a fight."

"And how are we going to prevent that?" Carmelita asked hopefully.

"We aren't," Bentley replied. "Since it's inevitable, we're going to plan around it. Sly will move around the city in a specific area where Murray, Coco, and I will be. When he moves to pick a fight with Sly as an 'obvious criminal', we'll back him up. Records show that when he becomes outnumbered, he gets backup from two specific individuals."

The next slide slid into place, this one a picture of a tall, well muscled duck in a brown flight jacket and goggles and a young female duck - about Huey, Dewey, and Louie's age - dressed in a green Robin Hood style outfit complete with mask, bow and quiver. "These two are never far from his side these days, though the young girl's presence appears to be despite his wishes, rather than at his directive...although his objections are never too strenuous."

"As though she was his particularly prodigious daughter who had been tagging along so frequently that he's given up trying to convince her it's 'too dangerous' or 'past her bedtime'?" Sly asked teasingly, glancing Coco's way. Coco responded with a blown raspberry.

"Very much so, actually," Bentley confirmed. "And that's where Coco comes in. Murray and I will guard your back so you can hold yourself against this 'hero', and to force him to try and think his way through the fight. Meanwhile, Coco will attempt to make contact with this Launchpad McQuack and the girl. The girl seems to be the brains of the outfit, while this Launchpad is the main muscle. One of them ought to be receptive...or at least think twice before attacking a little girl."

Carmelita frowned darkly. "...I don't like it. It puts Coco in too much danger."

"Would it help if I didn't reveal myself until after the girl showed up?" Coco offered. "She uses mostly her trick arrows, and I can deal with all of those with my staff and get her talking." She smirked up at Sly. "Maybe we can find some common ground?" she asked teasingly. Sly responded by blowing her a raspberry.

Carmelita groaned, burying her face in her hand. "Would one of you please act like an adult? At this point I don't care which anymore."

Despite Mom's objections, we went along with the plan...mostly because it was the best one. I found a good spot to observe and triggered my invisibility technique. Murray and Bentley found their own hiding places, while Sly moved into the open and prepared to draw attention.

Sly stood in the middle of the street, staring at the jewelry store window across from him. He sighed theatrically as he bent and picked up a rock. "This is so amateurish," he grumbled as he tossed it up and down a few times to check the weight. He then leaned back to throw.

"Indeed it is!" a harsh voice called out. "Which means it's time to take you to school!"

Sly dropped the rock. "Who's there?" he called out as he braced himself for combat. As if I didn't know...

A cloud of purple smoke appeared in front of the alley where Murray and Bentley were hidden, where Sly had had his back to before the voice called out. "I am the terror that flaps in the night!" the voice declared loudly. "I am the dryer that eats your left sock!"

Seriously? Sly mused, struggling not to burst into laughter. Was that supposed to be intimidating?

"I am..." A sudden flap caused the smoke to disperse all at once, revealing an older male duck in a dark purple button down jacket, cape, eyemask, and tando hat. "...Darkwing Duck!"

Sly smiled as he crossed his arms. "I was wondering when you'd show up," he mused softly. "This makes things much easier."

"We'll see who has things easy, sneakthief!" Darkwing called out, pulling a curiously configured launcher from his hip. "Suck gas, evildoer!" With that shout, he pulled the trigger.

Sly easily spun his cane to deflect the gas canister into the distance where it detonated harmlessly. "You know, calling out your attacks before you deliver them just asks for them to be deflected, right?"

"And what do you know about-" Darkwing started to say before something sent him flying forward to slam into the jewelry store facade just next to the window.

Murray unrolled from his ball form as he moved up to stand beside Sly. "I call that one the KataMurray!" he declared proudly. "Or the SpinCrash. Haven't really decided yet."

"Both have a nice ring," Bentley mused as he shifted his combat wheelchair into play, completing the semicircle that surrounded Darkwing.

"Not good," a young female voice suddenly said right beside Coco, much to her surprise. The girl dressed in green revealed herself as she reached over her shoulder for an arrow. "Dad's walked right into an ambush. I told him this was too obvious, but no. Such an obvious ambush must be a double feint to trap those who observe carefully before acting! Geeze, why doesn't he ever listen to me?"

"Yeah, I know that feeling," Coco mused aloud as she dropped her invisibility, making the girl yelp. "You don't want to know the hoops I had to jump through to get my Dad down there to let me come on missions." She held out her hoof. "Coco Cooper."

The girl stared at her suspiciously, but didn't immediately try to shoot her. Coco considered that a plus. "Quiver Wing Quack," she introduced herself. "What do you want with Darkwing?"

"Nothing bad, I promise," Coco responded readily. "But is Launchpad anywhere around?" Glancing down, she saw Darkwing had already leapt into battle, though Sly and the others were holding their own. "I've got a message for him that should stop this comic crossover cliche before it gets any worse."

Quiver Wing's eyes widened. "Wait...you guys are good guys?" she gasped in shock.

Coco grinned widely. "So you read comic books too. That should make things easier-"

"Beep!" Deik-Beck spoke up, revealing himself and looking between the two girls curiously.

Quiver Wing jumped, then glanced between the pair before her eyes widened even further. "You know Scrooge McDuck!" she concluded incisively.

Coco blinked in surprise, and then her grin widened. "Oh, we are going to get along famously. You can tell your Dad that I'll be telling 'Uncle Scrooge' about how this went."

Quiver Wing chuckled wickedly. "Oh, Dad's going to blow his top when he hears about this!" she purred, drawing an arrow with a whistle attached and aiming for the middle of the fight.

Gathering: Take 17

As the arrow hit the ground between the four combatants, it let off a shrill shriek that caused everyone to stop fighting...including Launchpad who had rushed up to help Darkwing. As they all covered their ears, an arrow with rope attached embedded itself in the imprint Darkwing had left when he slammed into the wall. Quiver Wing Quack and Coco slide down the rope - Quiver by her bow, Coco by her hook - to land in the middle of the group. "Dad, stop!" Quiver Wing called out. "These guys are the good guys!"

"Quiver Wing Quack!" Darkwing snapped out angrily. "You are supposed to be home in bed, young lady!"

"Doesn't that sound familiar?" Sly spoke up teasingly, glancing between Murray and Coco.

"Hey, that one worked out for the best Dad!" Coco snapped back defensively.

"As do most of mine, Dad!" Quiver Wing snapped at Darkwing. "Seriously, how many times have I bailed you out of trouble, mask or no mask?"

"And how many of those times would I have been in trouble if I hadn't constantly had to watch out for your safety?" Darkwing growled angrily.

Quiver Wing paused, tapping her chin thoughtfully. "...I count two," she offered finally.

Darkwing's open palm smacked into his face. "Razzle frazzle, grumble mumble..." he growled irritably and indistinctly under his breath.

"What makes you think these are good guys, Go-I mean, Quiver?" Launchpad asked, his voice good natured but confused.

"We have a mutual friend who wonders when you're coming back to Duckberg," Coco offered. "And he can vouch that we, like him, are tougher than the toughies and smarter than the smarties."

Launchpad's eyes popped wide as he gasped in shock. "DW! These guys are friends of Mr. McD!"

"What?" Darkwing gasped in shock. "Scrooge McDuck vouches for them? Then why were they trying to break into a jewelry store?"

"Because our projections said we'd end up in a pointless fight with you before you'd listen to reason no matter how we arranged meeting you, so getting the fight out of the way as fast as possible was determined to be the most efficient method," Bentley offered logically.

Quiver Wing giggled wickedly. "Wow Dad, they sure know you well!"

Darkwing glared daggers at her, but she continued to grin impishly up at him. Rubbing his hand down his face, he sighed. "I suppose I might as well go straight to cooperation, then," he concluded irritably. "Where are you holed up?"

"We found an old abandoned base up at the peak of the suspension bridge when we entered town," Sly explained readily. "It suited our needs perfectly, so we moved in-"

"That's my old base!" Darkwing snapped out angrily.

"Abandoned when you bought a house so you could adopt her?" Coco asked innocently, gesturing to Quiver Wing idly.

All three ducks stared at her in shock. "How...how could you possibly...?" Darkwing began in stunned amazement.

"All three of you have registered civilian identities and places of residence within St. Canard," Coco pointed out simply. "And one of you doesn't wear a mask."

Darkwing and Quiver Wing turned angry glares on Launchpad, who managed to look so sheepish Coco half expected him to sprout wool in place of his feathers. "Heh heh...whoops?"

After that discussion, Darkwing Duck, Launchpad, and Quiver Wing Quack came with us back to our hideout, Darkwing's old base. The irony of it wasn't lost on us. Once we returned, Quiver Wing talked Darkwing into sharing secret identities, under the justification that we already knew.

Darkwing Duck's secret identity was mild mannered Drake Mallard, a simple duck who enjoyed puttering around in his garden and taking care of his adopted daughter, Gosalyn Waddlemeyer-Mallard. The only other resident of the household was one Launchpad McQuack, an old friend of Drake's who helped take care of things around the house and made certain Gosalyn got to school on time. A rather unassuming cover...if Launchpad wore a mask. Seriously, the house wasn't even constructed until just before Drake Mallard adopted Gosalyn...which was just after Darkwing and Launchpad had saved her from those who had killed her grandfather for his weapons tech. How were we the first to put those pieces together?

The only point I found of interest to all of this was the fact that Gosalyn just happened to be very close to my age, and the same age as Uncle Scrooge's triplet nephews. I found that very interesting, and made that observation in an aside to Launchpad while everyone else was focused on planning an assault on Magica's keep. The look on his face was absolutely priceless, and made me certain I absolutely had to arrange that meeting.

Eventually, Darkwing came up with a plan of assault. I was completely gobsmacked. Is this the sort of behavior that makes him the most successful - and most infamous - hero of St. Canard?

...Gosalyn tells me that yes, yes it is.

Darkwing looked over the photos Coco had taken of Magica's volcano base, inside and out. "It seems Magica has planned quite well," he stated simply. "The base is fully fortified against any sort of heroic assault, making any sane attempt at rescue a suicide endeavor with very low chances of success." He then grinned widely. "Thankfully, I have a great deal of experience dealing with those far removed from sanity, and have learned to think like them. Second, I noticed something Coco missed." He pointed to the picture of Felicia Coco'd managed to take, focusing on the charm the little girl was wearing. "Specifically, these two runes powered by Mother's Love, the most potent magical force this world knows. The one on the left protects the wearer from any and all temperature extremes, while the one on the right is general 'protection from harm' enchantment, which means short of falling into the lava or getting shot, that and her tough skin should protect her from anything that might happen to her."

"Should have known a magi mother would go over the top keeping her daughter safe," Carmelita mused softly. "...wonder if Mrs. Ruby would teach me to make one of those for Coco..."

"Now, any normal plan of mine wouldn't work well in this situation," Darkwing continued, "but with these extra details, taking a page out of my nemesis' book should work wonders."

Quiver Wing's eyes lit up in amazement. "Wait, you mean...?"

"Exactly, Quiver," Darkwing confirmed. "We're going to strap all the explosive we can manage to our flier and fly it straight down into the lava pool at the bottom, hopping out at the last moment. You will stay on the back with my cape, while Coco will leap off with her light charged cane to break open the cage. You'll then pull them both back, and the three of you will use my cape to sail straight out the top of the volcano on the shockwave of the explosion. Once Felicia's in the water, Mrs. Ruby will be on the scene in moments. Magica doesn't have the power to build such a place, meaning most of it is being held up by Mrs. Ruby's power. If she removes it..." He let that hang in the air.

"Meanwhile, the rest of us fight our way out until we dodge our way out of a collapsing volcano?" Sly clarified.

"Just those of us combat ready," Darkwing corrected. "You, me, Launchpad, and Murray. The jet's not that big."

"That's your idea of a plan?!" Bentley, Penelope, and Carmelita all cried out, stupefied.

"I like it!" Sly, Murray, and Quiver Wing declared happily.

Guru, Coco, and Launchpad all put one hand, hoof, or paw to their face and groaned. Guru then turned to Darkwing. How do you know so much of magic? he inquired carefully, doing his best to pass as much of the message along as he could.

Quiver Wing giggled wickedly. "You can thank my step-mom for that!"

"Gosalyn!" Darkwing gasped out, blushing. "It's...it's not official, yet..."

"Only because you haven't gotten up the chutzpa to ask Morgana yet, DW," Launchpad teased, leading to Darkwing taking a swipe at him with his hat.

Gathering: Take 18

The plan worked almost disgustingly well, mostly because we were able to time the assault for a moment when Magica De Spell was out of her volcano base leading some conjured goons in seizing resources she had need of. We were able to crash the ship into the magma, and ride the shockwave out with Felicia easily. She seems to be similarly minded as far as adventure to myself, Gosalyn, and the Duckberg triplets.

However, our end of the plan hit an unexpected snag. Apparently, DW's cape wasn't quite as sturdy as he believed it to be...

Gosalyn, Coco, and Felicia held one of the three corners of the cape, with Gosalyn clutching the neck with her hands while Coco and Felicia each clutched one of the bottom corners in their teeth, slowly riding the hot air down towards the water. Everything seemed to be working out perfectly as they slowly floated down.

Then a spiraling ember from the magmatic explosion fluttered down onto the top of the cape, burning a hole through it that set the trio to plummeting far too fast.

"What now?" Gosalyn demanded fearfully. "We're going too fast to hit land or water safely with a toddler!"

"Slight change of plans!" Coco spoke up after shifting her grip on the corner of the cape, hoping one hoof would be enough to maintain the grip. "Here's hoping this works!" Swinging the Staff of Moonfire over, she pressed it against Felicia's charm collar before swinging it down towards the water. As she'd hoped, a sphere of magic shot into the water below. "I hope that did what I wanted it to-"

A sudden plume of water shot up beneath them, gently wrapping around the trio and slowing their descent as Mrs. Ruby rose out of it, catching the trio on her belly as she wrapped little Felicia in her arms. "Ah, my little chile, you're safe now! Mama's got you!" She snuggled the child happily, the picture of motherly joy as she slowly descended with the group back into the water.

Gosalyn managed to surface easily, quickly supporting Coco as she struggled in the water...only for the effort to quickly prove superfluous as Mrs. Ruby's tail lifted them both out of the water.

"Coco! You came and save mah little girl!" She quickly pulled Coco into a tight hug. "What ever were ya doin' here in St. Canard, anyway? Ah see ya made friends with Darkwing's little sidekick."

Coco smiled. "Bumped into Muggshot in Holland," Coco explained. "He mentioned you were here, so we came and looked you up. Didn't really like Magica, though."

"Ah yes, that old hag..." Mrs. Ruby's eyes narrowed darkly. With a quick lash of her tail, a huge lily pad took shape, where she set the trio down. "Excuse me a moment..." Turning to the artificial volcano, she slammed her hands down on the side of it and shouted something in a language Coco didn't know.

The volcano began to shake and crumble...and then explode outward, sending hunks of rock all across the bay, leaving only a solid piece of land with a hole in the middle. Sly, Darkwing, Murray, and Launchpad stood there, staring around in shock. "Well...that's one way for a plan to go all to pieces," Launchpad observed idly, chuckling slightly.

With Magica's base destroyed and Mrs. Ruby's support withdrawn, her chances of overthrowing Morgana were completely wiped out. We were free to leave the city without further activity. Much to our surprise, Mrs. Ruby was bound and determined to pay us back for saving Felicia. While Darkwing refused any such repayment - apparently, he'd be getting all he needed from Morgana later, according to Gosalyn - Uncle Bentley did point out that the mission to the Cooper Vault did call for an underwater specialist...

Mrs. Ruby and Guru quickly began an intense discussion regarding what happened to me in Australia. I quickly decided I wasn't really eager to listen, and instead made my way to a rooftop to think. I had something important on my mind...

...and some unexpected company...

Finding the vantage point she was looking for, Coco settled down with cane in hooves to stare out across the city, looking right at the Mallard residence where it sat innocuously in the residential district. No one would guess it was the home of St. Canard's most infamous, most successful super hero...unless they had half a brain.

"I don't get it," she murmured finally. "I mean...I'm happy they're okay and no one's tried to attack them...but why not? It's so obvious! Are the villains in this city just that stupid? Or...is there something I'm missing?"

"I can fill in the pieces if you want," a dark, menacing voice echoed over the rooftop.

Coco spun around, instinct calling the Mask of Dark Earth and the Staff of Moonfire to her for protection. Standing in the middle of the rooftop was a duck who could easily pass as Darkwing's brother, garbed in a yellow outfit with a red hat. With the way the light shone on him, his outfit took on a slight orange tinge. She shivered in fear, realizing this was the one Scrooge had warned her about...and she'd managed to deduce his name. "...Negaduck..."

Negaduck grinned widely. "Well, well, well...my reputation precedes me, despite all the effort I went to to ensure it didn't. I'm impressed." He slowly walked forward, pausing when Coco lifted her Staff defensively. "Oh, put those away. I'm not here to hurt you...this time." He suddenly pulled a chainsaw out of nowhere. "Not that you could stop me if I wanted to, could you?"

Coco felt true fear grip her heart. She could see the magical aura linking Negaduck and his weapon. While most would only see a chainsaw, and those with some connection to magic could sense it was more than just metal, through the eyes of the Mask of Dark Earth Coco could recognize the weapon for what it was...a Reaper's Scythe. And it was bound to Negaduck.

"I'm so glad we understand each other," Negaduck chuckled darkly. He moved to the edge of the rooftop. "But like I said, I'm not here to hurt you. I'm here to answer questions. You were wondering why Darkwing and his little family have never been attacked in their home, what's been protecting them." He turned and smirked at her. "You're looking at him."

Coco blinked, stunned. "Ex...cuse me?"

"I knew from the moment I faced off against Darkwing the first time that he was Drake Mallard," Negaduck explained. "Knew where he lived, knew who his family was, knew who his friends were. After all...the same all applies to me. In another timeline, I'm what he would have become. And now I intend to take this city, and my cruel legend will eclipse his dark one."

"Then why not go after Drake Mallard?" Coco asked curiously.

"Because killing Drake Mallard would mean nothing," Negaduck responded flatly. "He's a civilian. I can kill hundreds of civilians. No, I intend to kill Darkwing, kill the legend, and thus eclipse it. Which is why I make sure no one ever tries to unmask him...and no one targets that family. All the criminals in town know not to cross me, and attacking that family is - for some reason they don't know - something that will make me very, very cross." He grinned wickedly. "So they're safe in their home, free to run away from me whenever they want...because whenever the masks go on, I will hunt them down. So be careful of masks...they're often worth more to those like me than the one wearing it." With that, he let himself fall backwards off the rooftop.

Coco rushed to the edge, only to see no sign of him. A terrified whimper barely escaped her throat as she dashed madly back to the hideout.

...I had nightmares about that guy for the entire trip to look up The Panda King, who Uncle Bentley picked to be our ballistics expert for the job...

Gathering: Take 19

Our choice of Panda King as our demolitions expert was an easy one, as he was a friend - somewhat - and an expert in all things explosive...not to mention a real powerhouse in his own right. I was happy to learn he'd been spotted in the Kunlun Mountains in China, apparently pursuing a spiritual life of deep meditation. We could only hope he wouldn't be too upset about us disturbing his meditation.

When we arrived at his place of meditation, we found he was in deep trance atop a central pillar, with no obvious way to get up to him and wake him. At first, I thought it would be easy to make a way up, but...

The group stared out at the pristine oasis within the mountains. The icy lake, the peaceful pagodas, the soaring bamboo... Coco breathed deep of the tranquility, letting it push the last of the nightmares Negaduck had left her with away. Sly quickly spoke up. "Okay, we need to get up to that central pillar. Coco, Mrs. Ruby, do you think you two can-"

"Don't even think it, ringtail," Mrs. Ruby interrupted. "Can't ya feel the aura the King's givin' off? My magic won't work here while he's in deep trance, and askin' Coco to reshape the land at her level is askin' fer trouble."

"I guess we'll just need another way," Murray grumbled. "But I hope it doesn't involve more walking. I've got blisters on my feet the size of eggplants."

Perhaps you could use your Ball Form to bounce up the pillars to the higher ground? Guru suggested carefully.

"The bamboo would let Sly and Coco get up there," Bentley added, "if there were more jump points...and they weren't so high..."

"I could use my lightweight RC car to split the bamboo without letting it sink into the ice lake!" Penelope offered quickly, pulling out her controller.

"I could carry the rest of ya up the mountain if Coco leads the way," Mrs. Ruby offered. "She leaves a little magic in stone and wood when she walks up it, and I can grip those points."

Once we are there, I can more closely observe his trance state, Guru offered. Perhaps even guide Sly into entering the trance with him to bring him out of it.

"Alright then, let's do it," Sly stated firmly.

The plan worked out perfectly as far as it went. Once we were all up there, Guru led Dad into the trance with Panda King. He was in there for a while, and refused to discuss what he saw when they both came out of the trance. What they had to tell us, however, was of far greater significance than any idle curiosity regarding what happened in his head.

His daughter, Jing, had been kidnapped by General Tsao, a ruthless Rooster who reigned over a good portion of China through force and fear. He intended to solidify his rule over the entire area by forcing Jing to marry him, and had exiled the Panda King to keep him from interfering. Panda King had entered his deep meditation to try and find why he hadn't been able to bring himself to fight back, why he hadn't been able to protect Jing from Tsao's warriors.

We weren't about to let Tsao get away with this, however. We didn't need Mrs. Ruby's urging to decide that saving Jing from this took precedence over everything else. However, it seemed to catch Panda King off guard...

"...but that is enough of my problems," Panda King concluded as he finished his litany of what had happened. "You did not come all this way here just to listen to an old fool. I saw in your mind, Sly Cooper. You wish my assistance in accessing your ancestors vault. A...worthy endeavor-"

"We can get to that later," Sly interrupted. "First, we need to save Jing."

Panda King blinked, but nodded. "And in return, you desire my help-"

"No," Sly countered. "We're going to save Jing. No 'in return', just statement of action." He rested his hand on Coco's head. "I know your pain, Panda King. I'm not going to let anything happen to your daughter...just as your actions in their own way protected mine, time and time again. After Jing is safe, then we'll discuss whether you want to be involved in this job."

Panda King stared at Sly for a time, then bowed deeply. "You have grown much, young Cooper. I am in your debt for this." He smiled softly. "Though I doubt my Jing would allow me to choose a suitor for her once this is all over and done with, if you were not already spoken for..." He smirked as Coco burst into giggles.

"Whoa there, King!" Sly called out worriedly. "I've got my hands full just trying to keep Carmelita happy. Two women's more than any sane man can handle. What kind of crazy fool would even try?"

The entire group shared an amused chuckle at Sly's expense.

"So what can ya tell us about this General, huh?" Mrs. Ruby asked curiously. "Anything we need to watch out for?"

"Something your group seems well equipped for," Panda King observed. "He is skilled with blade and shield, but hand to hand combat is not his preference. He has an entire tribe of warriors at his beck and call, and he prefers to send them into battle while commanding them as their general. When he is forced to fight for himself...he relies heavily on his mastery of dark magic."

"Well that's not going to be pleasant," Coco murmured worriedly.

Gathering: Take 20

Once we tracked down General Tsao's compound, we began making a plan of attack. Tsao apparently planned on forcing the wedding at the end of the week, so we had to work fast. Uncle Bentley intended to be our inside man by getting hired - in disguise - as Tsao's wedding planner. Meanwhile Dad and I were handling a break in on a security station. Uncle Bentley was at first worried about us handling it without him, but Deik-Beck was more than up to the task of handling the tech.

The two of us working together to get the keys simplified things immensely. The two guards with the keys we needed were in constant radio contact, and the keys had a self destruct feature. If one of the guards learned the other's key had been stolen, they'd destroy their key. I let Dad steal his key first, while I followed the other guard around. As soon as he started reacting to his radio - showing Dad had swiped his key - I hit him with a knock out needle before filching his key. After that, I met up with Dad at the facility.

Once the double padlock was unlocked, Sly, Coco, and Deik-Beck made their way into the building. The first entrance was blocked by a laser security grid. "Looks like it's up to you, Deik-Beck," Coco whispered softly.

"Beep!" Deik-Beck piped up before sending out a cable to drag himself to a pillar. He then spread tiny hummingbird-style wings to buzz around the room, using knock-out needles and hook cables to shift unconscious guards onto pressure plates to open paths forward. Reaching the computer terminal, it was a matter of moments to hack in and copy everything inside. He then buzzed quickly back to Coco. "Job done!" he squeaked out happily.

"Then let's get back to base," Sly stated firmly.

By the time we got back, Uncle Bentley and Uncle Murray had gotten back as well, both with news good and bad. Uncle Bentley had not only managed to be hired on as wedding planner, but possible ways for Dad to get hired on as a photographer. On the bad side, he overheard Jing pleading with Tsao to let her father know she was well, and learned that she was being held as a prisoner, with little to no freedom whatsoever.

However, while we were out, General Tsao found our hideout and made off with Uncle Bentley's computer! That computer had all our plans on it, and would give General Tsao an unbelievable advantage over us. Daddy and I had to get it back.

Uncle Bentley was able to get access to Tsao's personal computer, which gave us a clue as to where he was holding it. It took some time - and a bit of help from Guru - to make it there, and then Dad and I had to confront Tsao directly. The original plan was to just get the computer back...

But I'm sure Mrs. Ruby can forgive me losing my temper...especially as far as why...

As Sly and Coco crawled out the opposite end of the tunnel, Coco shivered. "Dad, be very careful," she whispered breathlessly. "There's an incredible amount of magic focused up ahead, spirit and earth magic. I'm going to drop down to the bottom of the valley to see if I can't manage to get control of some of it...or at least keep from being overwhelmed."

Sly nodded. "Tsao's up in the treetops according to scans, so I can handle it for a while." As they reached the other end, Coco slid down the stone slope while Sly leapt out to the bamboo.

"Ah, the famous Sly Cooper," Tsao murmured seemingly uncaringly as he caught sight of Sly. "It seems you and your little gang were able to follow the trail I left for you. Of course, you'll be helpless without them, as you'll soon discover."

"I'm not ashamed to rely on my friends and family," Sly stated flatly.

"Who needs friends when you can have servants?" Tsao proclaimed dismissively. "Who needs-" Sly suddenly vanished. "Where did you-SQUAWK!"

Sly had appeared behind Tsao and smacked him in the back of the head with his cane, knocking him into the mist. "For example, I already know from one friend that the energies of this battleground sustain and enhance all true warriors. En garde."

Snarling, Tsao tried to fire off spheres of dark magic energy to hit Sly, only for Sly to vanish again. Tsao spun around to deflect the expected back attack, only for Sly to strike up from out of the mist, catching him right on the beak. Tsao tried to dash across the battleground with the blades on his shield spinning, but Sly merely vanished anew to strike him right in the nuggets, sending him back onto the bamboo.

"Fine! We'll fight where the advantage is mine!" Tsao snarled as he leapt down into the fog below.

"Coco!" Sly hissed out worriedly, leaping after him.

Beneath the mist lay a forest glen, with a river flowing through the middle. "Impressive, Cooper," Tsao snarled, doing his best to keep his voice level. "I'm surprised you adapted this well."

"Stop this, Tsao," Sly snapped back. "Release Jing King, and this fight can end."

"No!" Tsao proclaimed fiercely. "Jing King is mine! Once our bloodlines cross it shall be glorious! The Panda King, in his day, was magnificent. With the Tsao name, a new generation of Kings will be unstoppable!"

"But she doesn't want to marry you!" Sly pressed insistently.

"She's a woman!" Tsao countered. "She doesn't know up from down-"

The entire glade suddenly flared with power, and an unearthly howl that issued from no mouth echoed across the entire battleground. The mist parted, the bamboo and trees leaned out of the way, and full moon light shone down upon the field, focusing upon the blazing hook at the end of the Staff of Moonfire. Coco held it up, gathering the power as the Mask of Dark Earth on her face sucked the darkness left by the moonlight not reaching the field into itself, growing endlessly in power.

Tsao staggered back in shock. "The...The Mask of Dark Earth? But that's impossible! It is consumed by wrath-"

The mask suddenly opened, letting loose the howl of fury...a howl echoed by the Staff. Coco leveled the Staff at Tsao, and a blast of Light and Dark magic lashed from Staff and Mask, twisting around each other before it slammed into Tsao. He stared in shock as he was sent flying, only to vanish into the mist as Bentley's computer fell to the ground.

"Well, we got the computer back," Sly murmured as he picked it up. "But Tsao-"

"Has nothing anymore," Coco murmured furiously as she pushed the mask up. "Let's see what he thinks of his philosophy when he's on the receiving end. Uncle Bentley?"

"Yes, Coco?" Bentley asked through the comm.

"Can you send a memo to all of Tsao's men, making it look like it came from Tsao?"

"Easily," Bentley confirmed. "Why?"

"Make the memo tell them that General Tsao's 'sister' who likes to pretend to being a warrior has arrived, and that he's instructed her to help 'boost morale' amongst his troops," Coco responded firmly. "After that, it shouldn't be long before we can walk right into the palace and retrieve Jing...and raid his treasury at the same time."

"I can do that," Bentley agreed, "but...the records here don't suggest Tsao has a sister."

"He doesn't," Coco answered, putting Mask and Staff away. "But he'll realize what my spell did when she tries to wield sword, shield, or magic. Like I said, let him be on the receiving end of his philosophy."

"...I suddenly believe that song Dimitri wrote," Panda King murmured through the comm.

Since he was free, Uncle Murray went straight to the palace to break Jing out once the noise died down. The spell I cast on Tsao would wear off...eventually. It was keyed to his empathy, and would only wear off when his understanding of being female left him with the proper respect. He might eventually learn to use weapons and magic as a woman - the magic works differently for men and women because of how we connect to the magical fields - but he'd need to find a teacher. Good luck with that.

At Panda King's insistence, we dropped Jing off with her Aunt, where he claimed she'd be safe. I may have imagined it, but she seemed reluctant to say goodbye to Uncle Murray...as did he.

Gathering: Take 21

With everyone we needed to complete the job gathered, we made our way to Kaine Island in a boat of living wood Mrs. Ruby was able to provide us with, with a little help from the Staff of Moonfire. Unfortunately, as I gave that boost I learned that drawing the rage out of Mask and Staff like I had came with serious consequences. A massive migraine struck me, and I wound up slipping into a Dreamtime coma. Mom insisted on coming with to look after me, while Dad wanted to call off the mission until I was better.

Unfortunately, Dr. M was still trying to excavate the vault through the rock. We didn’t have time to wait, so Bentley carried out the plan with me staying behind with Mom. It seemed like everything was going according to plan, and Dad found that simply inserting the cane he’d inherited from his Father opened the vault...but Dr. M caught him at it.

Mom wouldn’t tell me the details, but by the time I came to, Dad was laid out beside me with a big bump on his head. I freely admit I was pissed...but I knew letting my anger drive my magic would just be asking for trouble, so I left the Mask and Staff on the boat while going to assist the others. I would have to limit my magic usage, and function as a thief instead of a mage.

Unfortunately, the backup plans Uncle Bentley and Penelope were coming up with didn’t really have a place for me in them. Not that I could blame them, but I wanted to help. Still, their plans were pretty good.

The biggest obstacle to overcome right at first was recovering Dad’s cane, which had gotten lost somehow during the struggle I missed. Guru’s efforts left the cane in the water, leading to Mrs. Ruby going after it. However, while in the water she wound up confronting Dr. M.

Mrs. Ruby swam after the cane as fast as she could, but despite being able to simply punch through the metal obstacles, she wasn’t able to get to it before Dr. M managed to grab it with his giant piranha bot. “Do you think I’ll fail against some washed up former villainous lackey?” he demanded angrily, his voice somewhat distorted by the water. He directed the piranha in an attempt to eat Mrs. Ruby.

“I think you’ll regret underestimating me!” Mrs. Ruby countered, diving straight into the bot’s mouth before discharging her magic straight through its superstructure into the power core.

As the bot fell apart, Dr. M’s exoframe carried him and the cane away. “You may control the water, but I control the skies-”

“No ya don’t, chile!” Mrs. Ruby shouted back. “My hubby’s on his way to see our little girl, and he brought friends!”

By the time Mrs. Ruby returned to the ship, Dad was awake to see Muggshot and his fighter pilots obliterating Dr. M’s aerial defenses through sheer force of numbers. Dr. M tried to counter with more mechanical creatures, but there were just too many. Muggshot himself came to the boat to deliver the recovered cane.

Muggshot grinned from ear to ear as he loped onto the boat, the cane in one hand. “Yo, Cooper!” he called out happily. “Got your cane back!”

“Thanks, Muggshot,” Sly responded warmly. “I’d have hated to lose this thing.”

“You should still take it easy,” Carmelita cautioned. “Both of you,” she added with a look towards Coco.

“Save your energies for getting through the vault,” Bentley offered as Felicia launched herself at Muggshot, crawling eagerly all over him. “Let us get you up there.”

“Alright, alright,” Sly allowed, accepting both admonishments. “I couldn’t have gotten this far without everyone, anyway. Might as well go in as a family.

As a result, the entire group went into the first vault chamber. Unfortunately, we quickly discovered that the only way forward required the use of Cooper family techniques. That’s when Mom really surprised us. She’d managed to get ahold of the Thievius Raccoonus when Dad wasn’t looking, and had been training herself in the family techniques to the point she could keep up with us. Uncle Bentley and Uncle Murray were completely stupefied, but Dad seemed quite pleased. I was just happy that the three of us could go into the vault together.

What we saw in there, though, was simply amazing...

Sly, Carmelita, and Coco gasped as they stared at what was within the Cooper Vault. The entire inside of the mountain of Kaine Island was hollowed out, filled with mountains of gold and ancient relics the likes of which had never been seen before. The path from tiny island in the water to tiny island could only be crossed from spire to spire, swing hook to swing hook. And on each island was a portrait of one of the Cooper ancestors, detailing something about them and the techniques they developed.

“There...there’s so much here...” Carmelita murmured in stunned amazement.

“With how far back my family stretches in history, you’re surprised?” Sly countered, though his own voice quavered somewhat.

“What are we going to do with it all?” Coco asked curiously. “There’s...there’s just so much...”

“We’ll figure that out once we get to the center,” Sly insisted. “For now...I need to see it all.”

Nodding in understanding, Carmelita and Coco followed Sly from island to island, Carmelita using her jetpack in places where Sly and Coco used gliders, pausing every so often to read the information from each Cooper ancestor on display. As they passed, Carmelita paused at one of the later ones. “...no way...” she murmured softly.

“What is it?” Sly asked curiously.

“After reading the Thievius, I looked up some of the lineage,” Carmelita explained. “It took a bit of doing, and some help from Scrooge’s resources...but several of the ancestors in the line had blood ties to some of the most powerful families throughout the world’s history. Slytenkhamen II was part of the Pharaoh's family, Rioichi Cooper’s son married one of the Emperor’s daughters, Sir Galleth Cooper was adopted into the royal family for services to the crown...” She shook her head. “If your ancestry were confirmed and made public knowledge...you’d inherit the entire world! Most of governments of those countries technically still rule in the name of those families, though as far as most know the families have all but vanished.”

“But why would I want to?” Sly asked as they made their way forward. “I’m not suited to ruling the world, nor would I have interest in trying. I’m just a simple thief, seeking adventure and joy with my friends and family. Besides, it was duty that pushed the Cooper Clan so far...a duty to protect the world from its own worst people. I’d say that duty takes precedence.”

The group paused at the last portrait, this one missing the top foot or so and showing a young Sly sitting in someone’s lap. “And I think my Dad would agree,” Sly confirmed before turning to the trail his Father had left him. A grid of lasers was the only thing between them and the vault, stretching far into the distance. “And what do you know...it’s my daughter who taught me how to cross this last obstacle. If she can ride magic...” Leaping forward, he braced himself on the laser beam and slid forward along it.

Carmelita stared in shock. Coco, however, leapt to follow her father.

Gathering: Take 22

It didn't take long for Sly and Coco to make their way through the field of lasers as they slid along the beams. Carmelita lagged behind, forced to rely on carefully controlled bursts from her jetpack to conserve enough lift energy to make her way through, barely managing to find a few landing points where she could slowly recharge. This meant that Sly and Coco reached the center of the Vault long before Carmelita did.

The center of the vault wasn't a place of wealth, however. It was a display of old vehicles constructed by the various Cooper ancestors, used in their heists. This was a hall of memorabilia. "This is...overwhelming..." Sly murmured as he stared around, his eyes going to an ancient airplane. "How did Thadius make a flying machine in the eighteen hundreds?"

"Very well, it seems," Coco marveled as she got a better angle. "Looks like it still works!"

"Oh, it's absolutely operational, I'm certain," a deep, gravelly voice declared, calling their attention.

Dr. M was a bright purple mandrill with large hands, a red face, and on odd helmet that hooked into a spider like carrier mecha that he'd ridden in on, with a well protected power core rising up from the top as the legs spread around him to lift him off the ground. The light of madness was in his eyes as he glowered down at the pair through his glasses. The legs moved as he approached the pair.

"Dr. M," Sly greeted coldly as he approached. "So glad you could make it. I know you were looking forward to seeing all this."

"Looking forward to all this..." Dr. M confirmed. "And your death!" He braced his machine, but paused as he noticed Coco's expression. "What?" he demanded irritably. "Is there something on my face?"

"...I'm just wondering what the M stands for," Coco responded playfully. "Mojo, by any chance?"

Dr. M let out an angry snarl as the spider-like metal legs lifted him up higher. "I am going to crush you!" he roared out.

"And the crushing shall be the most terrible crushing that has ever been crushed, for this is the crushing you most assuredly will bring upon me?" Coco teased wickedly.

The metal legs minced and stomped in response to Dr. M's fury. "Do you think this is a game, that you can get away with such taunts?"

Coco tapped her chin, her eyes glancing to how Sly had used her actions to slip around behind Dr. M. "Upon reflection," she mused idly, "this is most definitely not a game. But I do know what it is."

"Oh?" Dr. M hissed, his eyes narrowed in nearly inarticulate fury. "And just what is it, then?"

"A distraction," she replied brightly as she rolled to the side.

Before Dr. M could react, Sly had used the mirror he'd placed in the hook of his cane to reflect one of the laser beams around the outside of the chamber's central platform to sweep up Dr. M's back and across the machine, managing to damage the power core enough to cause a few errors. Dr. M roared in pain, spinning to face Sly. "So you stab me in the back, just like your father!" he roared out angrily.

"There's another way I'm like my father," Sly pointed out calmly. "I never fight alone."

The mandrill's eyes widened in realization, and he spun around just in time to get a face full of 200 year old flying machine, the engine roaring as he was driven into the side of the chamber. "What do you know?" Coco asked as she hopped out before impact, landing lightly on her hooves. "It does still work." She glanced at the dust cloud from the crash. "Or...did?"

An inarticulate roar of rage heralded Dr. M using his mech to lift the flying machine off of him and throw it to the side. "WHY?" he roared at the top of his lungs. "Why are you so determined? Why are you able to best me so easily? Why does that pony fight as well as you?"

"For the same reason my Dad broke up his Gang," Sly stated firmly. "For my family." He moved to stand beside Coco, both posing with their canes.

Dr. M's eyes narrowed. "Is that so...?" he murmured as he saw Carmelita entering the chamber. "If that is your strength..." A massive energy discharge focused in his mech's power core before launching straight at Carmelita, who lacked the energy in her jetpack to dodge.

"Carmelita!" Sly yelled out, lunging forward. The blast slammed into him, sending him flying at an angle due to his own momentum to slam into another wall. He dropped from there onto a rocky shelf, his cane clattering to the side as he slumped, seemingly lifeless.

"Daddy!" Coco screamed out in despair.

Dr. M started to laugh. "Your strength seems like a weakness, Sly-"

"Shut up!" Carmelita snarled, yanking out her stun blaster and charging towards the mandrill.

Dr. M laughed as he raised up on his mecha's legs. "You think you can-"

Carmelita grabbed hold of an odd extrusion on her gun and yanked, pulling an electric sword out and slashing the legs off the mandrill's mecha before plunging the sword into the power core, which began to spark like crazy.

"What have you done?" Dr. M yelled in fear. "The core's barely stable as is! It's going to explode!"

Carmelita seized him by his lab coat. "You're the genius," she snarled angrily. "You'll figure it out!" With that, she tossed him off the edge of the platform and into the seemingly bottomless pit below.

"Mom!" Coco called out from her place beside Sly's limp form. "Come quick! I think he's still breathing!"

Carmelita quickly leapt up to the shelf, staring down as Sly slowly stirred. As she saw his eyes open, she let out a sigh of relief. "Thank goodness you're okay," she murmured in relief. "How are you feeling?"

"Ugh...my head hurts..." Sly murmured softly, sitting up to rub the back of his head.

"That's not good," Carmelita murmured worriedly. "Bentley said your head's still banged up from fighting Dr. M's first monster, and another hit to the head..." She leaned in close to check Sly's eyes.

Sly stared back at her, a confused expression on his face. "Who's...Bentley?" he asked carefully. "And...Dr. M? And who are you?"

Carmelita's eyes widened. "Sly...if this is some kind of scheme, it's not-"

"Sly?" Sly asked worriedly. "Is...is that my name?"

Coco shivered, tears forming in her eyes.

Deep below the mountain, an explosion was heard.

"We can talk about this later," Carmelita stated firmly, marshaling her emotions as she helped Sly to his feet. "This whole place is about to fall apart..."

Shattered

By the time we got Dad outside, it was plain he wasn't faking...not that I could think of a reason why he would fake it. Dad had...no memory of anything. He didn't even recognize his cane. He seemed to know Mom and me, in the sense he felt he should, but there was nothing in there to connect to it. Any time he tried to think on it, he wound up clutching his head in pain. Mom decided it was best to keep him away from the others for now, in case too much input from that part of his brain overwhelmed him while he was still healing from the double impact to his head. That left me to deliver the news to the others.

...they didn't take it well...

"What?" Bentley asked in shock. "Sly's...lost his memory?"

"He has amnesia?" Murray asked, stunned.

"It sure seems that way," Coco confirmed. "He...he didn't know me or Mom. Not...not the way he should. And when he tried to think, it hurt his head."

It may be just physical injury causing this, Guru observed. However, given how close Sly has come to death recently, there may be spiritual scars as well. If you think he can handle it, I would like to look into his aura through Dreamtime. I might be able to perceive something useful about his condition.

"Please do," Coco agreed readily, struggling to hold back her tears. The sight of her Dad not even knowing her, looking at her like a stranger...it had torn at her heart.

As Guru went to see to Sly, Panda King rested one massive paw on her back. "Do not worry too much, little one," he offered gently. "The bond between parent and child is not so easily severed. You have been a large part of his life for a long time. That bond remains, even if he does not remember it. In all likelihood, short of a miraculous cure that love will return full force before the memories, and likely bring with it the memories in its wake. He is still your father, and you are still his daughter. I have seen into his mind as he saw into mine...and nothing could shatter that."

"Don't ya doubt that for a second, lil' Coco," Mrs. Ruby confirmed. "Trust me when I say Sly'll make a full recovery...eventually. Just be patient and lovin', that's my advice."

"Sly's a tough old coon," Muggshot agreed. "So he's a bit more banged up this time than normal. He'll be leaping from rooftops in no time, you at his side."

"So what should we do?" Penelope asked curiously. "To help Sly, I mean."

Coco thought to herself for a time. She knew what her Dad would do. "The Vault's broken," she said finally. "That explosion damaged the structure of the mountain. It's going to collapse in all likelihood. There are flying machines of all sizes inside. Penelope, get as many of them running as you can. Mrs. Ruby, Muggshot, Uncle Murray, Panda King, get as much of the treasure in the Vault into the flying machines as you can without compromising flight capability or putting yourselves in danger. Everyone take whatever you think is fair payment for this job out of the gold coins and loose gemstones sized for easy disposal in the market. Put any artifacts, paintings, or culturally significant items together. We'll take those to Uncle Scrooge, and he'll find a safe place to store them for us, as well as the rest of the contents of the Vault not divided up to the rest of you."

While most of the group nodded soberly, Penelope looked stunned. "Whatever we think is fair?" she asked in shock. "You trust us that much to not rob you blind?"

Coco shrugged. "I do trust all of you to be our friends. I also trust that even if you all took as much as you could carry on your own blimp from in there, it wouldn't be a drop in the bucket compared to what's in there. Besides, I only care about the stuff that has cultural or family significance, which you wouldn't be able to dispose of on the black market, anyway."

Panda King and Mrs. Ruby both chuckled at that, while Penelope's jaw dropped at that description of just how much there was.

You need not set aside a portion for me, Guru spoke up as he returned. I have no need of worldly possessions, and the experiences of this journey is more than enough payment for my efforts. All I need in life is a quiet land in which to meditate, and the land will provide what I need for survival and comfort.

"Should the Outback ever prove too noisy for you, feel free to come to my lands," Panda King offered. "I have plenty of space, and can easily find a quiet spot for you to be undisturbed."

Guru nodded his thanks for the offer. I have examined Sly's Dreamtime Aura, he continued, his tone more grave. Assuming I am not misinterpreting...it seems his memory is fractured between past and present. He is aware of those he knows in the present, but the connections to his memory of them is damaged. It would be best to limit his contact with those he knew well - beyond yourself and Carmelita - until his memory begins to return. Otherwise, I fear permanent damage to his memory as it tries to force itself.

Coco nodded slowly. "Alright. We'll...we'll stay close to him." She turned to the group. "For the rest of you...I guess this is goodbye."

"Only for now, little one," Panda King offered gently. "We will surely see each other again, when Sly is once more himself. Until then, I bid only adieu."

Coco nodded, watching as the group moved to take action. Mrs. Ruby moved into the vault first, shifting everything of cultural or family value onto the boat she'd grown for their trip here, filling it with valuables once that was complete. After that, she began manipulating the water to send large batches of gold and jewels up to the blimps and larger flying machines Penelope and Bentley were reactivating. She watched that pair talk eagerly about something or other for a time, then turned back to get her Mom and Dad.

It was a long sail to Duckberg...but maybe Uncle Scrooge might know something about amnesia that the others didn't. She would just have to hope there.

Picking up the Pieces

It was a long trip back to Duckburg, and not an entirely pleasant one. Dad had a lot of questions...and we were honestly afraid to answer him. Would the wrong answer do him more harm than good before he was ready? Would not giving him the right answer drive him away? Could we unwittingly make it impossible for him to recover his memory?

Eventually, Mom settled for telling him we were going to see a family friend, hoping he would have some idea how to handle the present situation given his vast wealth of life experiences...not to mention his vast wealth. If he didn't already know a way to fix things, he could certainly hire the world's best experts to find the way to do it. Dad seemed to accept that, but we could both tell he was antsy.

The arrival in Duckburg harbor couldn't come soon enough...and Deik-Beck thought ahead enough to call Uncle Scrooge and let him know to expect us, as well as getting directions as far as which dock we were to weigh anchor at. He was even kind enough to meet us at the dock.

As the boat sailed into the port, Scrooge stood alone at the dock, waiting for the gangplank to lower so he could meet these family members. The message he'd gotten from the little robot had only told of a port arrival requiring delicacy, so he'd guided the ship to his 'night dock', where any shipping operations he didn't particularly want to be public knowledge - though rarely for reasons of illegality - were conducted in the dead of night. The moon shone bright at zenith as the sound of hooffalls told him that his newest niece was desperate for comfort even before he could see her clearly. He held his arms out and caught her mad dash, holding her close. "There now, lass, it's gonna be alright," he promised comfortingly. "Just calm down and tell Uncle Scrooge what's happened."

Coco managed to get her sniffles under control. "Dad has amnesia."

"Eh?" Scrooge demanded, aghast. "How did that happen?"

"Well, we were at the Cooper Family Vault..." Coco began carefully.

"Ya dinnae say?" Scrooge interrupted eagerly. "Ya know, ah've always wondered what it looked like inside there."

"It was really pretty before the whole place collapsed," Coco allowed.

"Drat!" Scrooge snapped. "And all that treasure gone-"

"Actually, we managed to salvage it all," Coco interrupted. "Speaking of, we could use your help with properly storing all the artifacts on the boat, as well as finding a new place to store all the gold and jewels that were our share once we gave the rest of the Gang their cuts." She looked around. "Uh...you're not gonna carry all of it yourself, are you?"

Scrooge chuckled as he made his way up the ramp. "Now lass, ah may look old but ah'm still as spry as the day ah-" He froze as he caught sight of the massive piles of treasure - gold, jewels, and artifacts made of both - that filled the ship from keel to mast. "...well pluck me tail feathers and call me baldy..." he murmured, completely stunned. "This is more than ah've got in me money bin."

Coco's eyes widened in shock. "We're richer than you, Uncle Scrooge?"

"Nah lass, not at all!" Scrooge insisted. "The money bin is just a good portion o' me liquid assets. Most o' me wealth is locked up in makin' more, after all. But it does place ya as the third wealthiest family in th' world, right after me and Glomgold."

"Third, fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh, and eighth," Coco pointed out. "Most of the liquid gold and jewels got divided more or less evenly to the others in the gang as their cuts."

"...well, before ya divided it, the Coopers were the second wealthiest family, then," Scrooge concluded. "Not that ye could have publicized it." He shook his head to dispel those thoughts for the moment. "We'll get the ship into th' harbor, and then we'll see what we can do about Sly, eh?"

"Thanks Uncle Scrooge," Coco responded warmly as the ship tacked as instructed, sailing into the cliff-side as the door to the underground harbor opened up.

Once Coco and Carmelita were settled for a night of fitful sleep, Scrooge led Sly through his mansion to an area he'd prepared just for such an occasion. "Ye doin' okay there, Sly?" he asked calmly as he hopped up onto a rope and began to make his way across.

"I guess so," Sly answered as he hopped up without thought, maintaining his balance as effortlessly as ever. "Where are you taking me?"

"Well, ah need ta see ta yer amnesia," Scrooge explained as he hopped onto another rope before sliding down it. "Ta do that, ah need ta see what ya still remember."

"I've tried to remember," Sly pointed out helpfully as he slid after Scrooge without any trouble. "But whenever I try, it hurts."

"Ah don't mean yer conscious memory," Scrooge countered as he leapt off the end of the rope to sidle around a tower over a pit of slime. "It's everythang else ah wanna know aboot right now." He leapt off the other side, catching a hook with his cane and swinging down a sequence of them.

"So you're taking me somewhere to find out what I don't know I remember?" Sly asked as he continued to follow effortlessly, the Cooper family techniques coming to him as easily as breathing.

"Somethin' lahk that," Scrooge allowed as he began a sequence of flips, rolls, jumps, and crawls through a shifting field of lasers. "Just keep up."

"I'll do my best," Sly promised as he leapt onto a laser through the middle of the room, sliding down it straight to the other side.

Scrooge's jaw dropped as he witnessed that. "Blow me bagpipes, where'd ya learn ta do that?"

"Learn what?" Sly asked in confusion as he hopped off the laser to land beside Scrooge.

Scrooge's face fell. This did not bode well. All of Sly's skills as a master thief were completely intact...but none of it triggered any conscious memory. This was going to be difficult, both to overcome...and to explain to Carmelita and Coco...

Trying to Deal

Scrooge sat sadly in the sitting room with Carmelita and Coco. "Ah'm afraid what ah learned isn't...entirely pleasant," he offered sadly. "Nor is it...hopeful."

Carmelita swallowed convulsively. "Tell me."

"His physical memory is spot on," Scrooge explained. "Every Cooper technique, every skill he ever developed, every trick of the thieving trade...it still comes as naturally to him as breathing, and without even thought. Tested all of them as discreetly as ah could, and he didn'a even realize he was doing it half the time. Even that laser slide move..." He shook his head in amazement. "And he doesn't even remember enough ta tell me how it works."

"That's...good, right?" Coco asked hopefully.

"...unfortunately, no," Scrooge replied sadly. "If he didn'a remember some of it, we could have used teaching it to him again as a way to bring back other memories, like when he learned it th' first time. But it's all there...and didn'a bring back any memories through practice. I...I'm afraid this leads to th' bad news."

"...go on," Carmelita managed to say, steeling herself to keep her voice from breaking.

"Ah have noo idea how ta get his memories back, ta jog his memory ta bring him back," Scrooge explained. "It might come back on his own someday, it might not...but there's nothin' ah can do. Ah seen this before...and all we can do is wait and hope."

Coco's ears fell flat against her skull as her eyes began to water. "Is...isn't there anything we can do?" she asked hopefully.

"Only thing that can be done fer him is ta stay with him," Scrooge offered sadly. "Keep him with those who love and care fer him the most, answer whatever questions ya can, and...be there fer him. But fer now...his past is lost."

Carmelita let out a heavy sigh. "If that's all we can do..." she murmured sadly.

Scrooge stood up and rested a hand on Carmelita's. "Ah know this is gonna be hard for ye. If ye need anything at all, don't hesitate to ask."

It wasn't a pleasant thing to hear. The raccoon I knew as Dad was...gone, and an echo left in his place, an echo that might someday become him again. It seemed especially hard for Mom, though. I admit I'm not entirely sure why. Mom tried to explain it a couple of times, but I didn't really get it.

As Mom went with Uncle Scrooge to make arrangements as far as where we'd live - her apartment back in Paris was simply too small for three, and the hideout wasn't appropriate for a cop - I went to deliver the news to everyone else. It wasn't a pleasant conversation...but one bit of it gave me a bit of hope.

"...and that's how it is," Coco concluded as she finished telling the others through video conference what Sly's state was. "I...I don't know what to do..."

"The old duck's advice is the wisest," Panda King offered gently. "Stay with him, and he will remember. Do not lose faith."

"Yeah!" Murray added from the same screen. "Sly's as tough as they come. He's not gonna let something like this slow him down for long!"

"And maybe it can be a good thing," Muggshot suggested. "If he's lost his memory, he's a new person by law. The two of you can stick with yer Mom, and live as a family."

"His memory will come back in time," Mrs. Ruby agreed. "The stars speak of great fate awaiting you all, and the stars do not lie!"

"I...I just wish there was something more we could do for him," Bentley spoke up morosely. "For...all of you."

"...maybe there is," Penelope murmured thoughtfully, resting her hand on Bentley's shoulder. "If you'll lend us the Thievius Raccoonus."

"Huh?" Coco asked in surprise. "You have an idea?"

"Maybe a crazy one," Penelope admitted. "But crazy ideas seems to be what this Gang does best. Scrooge said Sly's lost his past, right? Well...what if we were to go find it for him and bring it back to him?"

Coco tilted her head in confusion. "I'm not sure I understand-"

"Circuits and surge protectors!" Bentley suddenly yelped out. "Are you suggesting building a time machine to fix Cooper's amnesia?"

"Why not?" Penelope suggested archly. "Is it any crazier than anything you've done before? We could go back and collect a video record of Sly's entire life and play it super fast for him to spark his memories...or bring him through from the past to refresh his future self's memory...or just prevent him from getting that first head injury from Dr. M's frankenstein-ish creature! One of those is bound to work!"

"And what about the causality paradox from not having a reason to build a time machine after fixing Sly's memory?" Murray asked curiously. "And thus not going back to fix it?" He noticed everyone turning to stare at him. "What? Chrono Trigger's an awesome game!"

"Okay, so preventing his amnesia is problematic," Penelope allowed. "Unless I manage to let past me see future me taking action, making her realize she needs a time machine to go back and fix it so it's just a causality loop..."

"...it's worth a shot," Coco allowed hopefully, desperate to cling to any chance that Sly would remember...

Deik-Beck crawled along the ceiling, staring down at where Sly was sleeping peacefully. The robot had made its way here after hearing out Scrooge's conversation with Carmelita and Coco, and had scurried here as soon as it was unobserved. Having disconnected all security systems, the tiny metal crab's eyes glowed red in the darkness. "This is not your end, Sly Cooper," the voice echoed softly in the dark room. "You brought about my downfall. If I can not bring an end to your legend, then I shall see to it that no one else will. I will not let this Dr. M succeed where I failed. Your memory will return, and your legend will be eternal. Clockwerk was conquered by Cooper...and so none shall conquer Cooper.

"Thus says Clockwerk."

Learning to Cope

It didn't take long for us to find a good place, with Uncle Scrooge's help. It just so happened he owned a few homes in Paris that were available to rent, and one that just happened to meet our needs perfectly was currently empty. Between the value of our share of the Cooper treasure and Mom's salary as an Interpol agent, rent was easy enough and it didn't raise as many eyebrows as flat out buying a place would have.

It was a small house. Three bedrooms, two bathrooms, dining room, kitchen, and a sitting room. Ostensibly, the third bedroom was supposed to be a guest room...but Mom insisted on taking it, leaving us each with our own room. It'd be a while before she explained that to me.

While we waited for Dad to try and regain his memories, Mom went back to being a cop full time. I stayed with Dad most of that time, but at least at first it began to feel like Mom was trying to spend as much time away from Dad as she could. She probably was, for the same reason she took a separate bedroom, though why escaped me.

Still, even without his memories, Dad was stubborn...and definitely wanted to spend more time with Mom. Since I took that as a good sign, when Dad started bugging me about where Mom was while she was on the job, I decided we should tag along with her. If thief techniques didn't stir memories, maybe working alongside her would.

Carmelita moved carefully as she made her way into the warehouse. The thief techniques she'd picked up working with Sly all those years had drastically improved her abilities as a cop, allowing her to take on much tougher cases solo. This one in particular was one she definitely wanted to take down hard. The gang in question was especially rough, and evidence suggested they were involved in everything from petty theft to illegal arms trading...to even sophont trafficking. All she wanted to do was get in, get the evidence she needed to take the entire group down, crack a few skulls, and then get home and hug her pony daughter as she tried hard not to think about what she'd already seen sneaking into the various bases this gang had.

Because it wasn't just their crimes that she'd seen evidence of. She'd managed to get ahold of the one document of communication between this gang and their backer that hadn't been completely eradicated until there was nothing useful left. And one name had set her on this quasi-legal takedown. Seft.

Slipping along the cross beams at the roof, she carefully examined her targets. Several larger crooks and nearly two dozen smaller ones, all of them wearing body armor that would render her stun rounds completely useless unless she managed a shot straight to the face, and that ran the risk of frying their brains or sensory organs. She would have to take them down in melee, and she was at a severe disadvantage that way unless she could manage to thin their numbers somehow.

Unfortunately, it seemed luck would not be on her side. As she'd moved to find a way to draw some of them away from where they were counting their loot, her foot came down in a wet spot on the metal beam caused by a very tiny leak in the roof above. She slipped, barely managing to catch herself on the cross beam before she fell to the floor below...as her shock pistol did, shattering as it hit the floor.

Knowing the time for stealth was over, she swung herself to the side, kicking off a wall as she moved to take out some of the smaller thugs with blows to the head even as they turned their heads towards the noise. A few well placed kicks and punches had six of them down before the gang was able to react, and another three before they were able to move to surround her. She braced herself as they gathered.

Much to her frustration, they chose to speak to each other in a language she didn't know, so she wasn't able to take anything they said as evidence she could use against them. However, the way they were gesturing to her and grinning - she'd worn her old uniform that she'd used for when pursuing Sly out of habit - told her plainly what they intended if the rumors of sophont trafficking were at all true.

Turning, she dove for the remains of her weapon. The shock blade would still be functional as long as that part of the weapon was in one piece, and that would give her plenty of advantage as far as making them keep their distance, giving her time to plan. A sudden blow to the back of her head put an end to those plans, sending her careening across the floor towards the wall. As she struggled to get her thoughts in order, she stared up as one of the larger thugs moved towards her with a grin on his face...only for his eyes to roll up into his head as he slumped forward into unconsciousness.

"There's very few things I won't tolerate in criminals," a soft, familiar voice spoke as someone dropped lightly to the floor between Carmelita and the gang, right in a spot of shadow cast by an errant cloud over the moon. "And what do you know...it just so happens you lot have hit on all of them." A flash of light against something gold pierced the eyes. "So I hope you've been keeping up your religious obligations."

As the cloud passed, the light of the moon fell on a swirl of black as something lunged into the gang, striking out in flashes and thuds, laying them low before they could even react. Several of the smaller thugs made a run for the door, only for it to slam open before them. Crimson eyes glowed in the darkness, and an owl's hunting shriek rent the air. Flashes of metal sent the thugs flying around the large chamber, slamming into walls and slumping to the floor.

The last thug backed slowly away from the shadowed figure that stalked towards him. "What...what are you?" he gasped out in terror as he shook, desperately lifting a gun.

A flash of gold and the gun shattered, along with the thug's hand. "...pissed," the figure in shadows growled. The thug fainted.

A familiar hand gently helped Carmelita to her feet. "Are you alright...Carmelita, right?" Sly asked as the light shone down on him, Deik-Beck and Coco moving from the exit to join him.

"You...remember?" Carmelita asked, a desperate hope in her voice.

"Just...a few bits and pieces," Sly allowed. "I remember...that I want to protect you." He blinked, then smiled his familiar rakish smile. "And that you don't like that," he added teasingly.

Carmelita sighed sadly, but smiled. "It's a good start..."

...is it wrong I enjoyed watching Dad scare the living crap out of those thugs like that? I don't think it is, and neither does Deik-Beck.

Coming Back

The bits and pieces coming back were a start, but it was still a long way to go. Still, it was a very good sign. It meant Dad was still in there, and was slowly but surely coming back to us. He still didn't remember me too clearly, but that little bit of Mom he remembered was enough to keep me hopeful. Unfortunately...it just seemed to make things harder on Mom...

Coco gently nudged the door to her Mom's room open. "Mom?" she asked softly. "Are...are you okay?"

Carmelita quickly wiped her face, trying to hide the signs she'd been crying. "I'm just fine," she lied quickly. "What's the matter, sweetie?"

Coco stared up at her softly, her eyes sad. "I...I heard you crying," she offered sadly.

Carmelita couldn't help but wince at that. She'd forgotten just how good Coco's senses were...and the fact the house lacked any soundproofing beyond distance. She also knew trying to deny it would just get Coco pressing harder, and likely lead to something unpleasant in her present mood. Besides...as much as she didn't want to burden Coco with her emotional state, the fundamental issue was the same for both of them. And there wasn't anyone else she could talk with about this. "Yeah...I was crying."

Coco silently walked up to the bed and hopped up beside Carmelita. "It's about Dad, isn't it?" Coco asked quietly.

"Yeah..."

"He's starting to remember," Coco murmured softly. "Isn't that...a good thing?"

"It is...and it isn't," Carmelita explained. "It's very good for us, that he's...he's going to recover. But...it's making other things harder..."

Coco turned to look at her Mom. "How so?"

Carmelita hesitated. "I'm...I'm not sure how I can explain this to you-"

"Is it about the sex stuff?"

Carmelita thanked every star in heaven that she hadn't been drinking right then. "What?"

"That seems to be what makes all grownups uncomfortable when talking to me," Coco explained. "It's not like I don't get it, though." She pulled out the Staff of Moonfire. "Life, Light, and Creation. Two thirds of this things magic is about making babies, not to mention that's pretty much the focus of everything wild in nature. With my studies of shamanistic magic, I get it. I might not get the emotional part of it cause I'm not that mature yet, but you don't have to dance around the subject with me. Besides, you already gave me the talk, remember? After I asked Dad about what I saw in the cabin in the snowy mountains in China?"

Carmelita sighed softly. "Yeah, I suppose I should have seen that coming," she admitted. "Still...this is heavily in the emotional part you don't get yet. That...makes the explanation awkward."

Coco tapped her chin thoughtfully after putting the staff away. Hearing something in the distance, an idea popped into her head. "Then explain it to me as if I would get it," she suggested. "If I do get it, maybe I can help you figure it out. If I don't get it, actually vocalizing it might help you all on its own, and I won't ask uncomfortable questions."

Carmelita smiled softly. "I suppose that could help," she murmured, gently mussing Coco's mane with one hand. She then leaned back, closing her eyes as she looked into her own heart. "When Sly lost his memory...it hurt. It hurt a lot, knowing I was now all but a stranger to him...when before that we were all but wed. Probably the only reason we hadn't gotten married yet was because he hadn't popped the question yet." She shook her head, bringing her mind back to the sad thoughts that plagued her. "But I...accepted that he had lost his memory. And when there was no way to tell if he would remember, I was able to make myself...treat him like we were back at square one. I love him...but I was going to wait for him to learn to love me again, or not. I wasn't going to try and pressure or push him. That would...it would feel like I was taking advantage of him."

Coco nodded slowly. "I...I guess I see why you would think that," she murmured, doing her best to cover the almost silent footsteps she heard slowly approaching without being obvious that she was trying to cover something.

"And now...he's starting to remember," Carmelita continued. "He's in there, and starting to come out. I...I want nothing more right now than to...than to go into his room and show him just how much I love him, how much I need him back, to try and spark his memory...but..." She lowered her head sadly. "But that would still be taking advantage...and what if he never forgives me for it? Or...or if it makes it harder for him to remember? But...I miss him, being with him, so much..." She curled up slightly. "My head knows waiting is the right thing to do...but my body doesn't want to wait, and forcing myself to do so is making my heart hurt, as I'm forced to think 'what if this is as far as it goes?' We...we'd never have gotten this far if not for working together to raise you. What if...what if your need was the kindling that brought out that spark? And...and now that your need is less, the spark won't happen again?"

Coco stared up at Carmelita, wishing she could think of something to say. As she looked up, however, she noticed something that put a little smile on her face. "I guess I can't help you Mom...but maybe someone else can."

"Huh?" Carmelita asked, turning towards Coco in confusion...only to see Sly drop down from the ceiling, a soft smile on his face. "Sly, what are you-"

Her words were cut off as Sly leaned in, putting a finger to her lips. "Sometimes it's hard to remember...to sort through the noise in my head to find what's important..." He leaned forward as Coco silently left the room. "But one thing was certain, as long as I kept trying. How could I ever forget a gorgeous vixen like you...especially one who cares so much for me?" Before Carmelita could do more than gasp, he lunged forward and locked lips with her.

Carmelita's eyes popped wide open. This wasn't the uncertain kiss of someone trying too hard, or a strange kiss from someone new. This was Sly's kiss, and she knew it far too well. Her eyes slowly slipped closed as his arms slipped slowly around her. She moved to put her arms around him, only to feel something pull her left wrist short. Pulling back from the kiss, she saw her right wrist was handcuffed to the bedpost. "Sly!" she demanded crossly.

Sly smirked teasingly. "You act like this is the first time I slipped cuffs on you in the middle of a kiss," he offered playfully, twirling the key around his finger. "At least this time I didn't leave you at the edge of a lava pit."

Carmelita's eyes widened. "You...you remember...?" Her voice held desperate hope.

"Not everything yet," Sly answered softly. "I remember us taking Coco in...the hut in China...a few bits and pieces here and there, like clips from a film real, or highlights for a trailer...but there's one important thing that's come back."

"W-what's that?" Carmelita asked through a blush, seeing the way he was looking at her.

Smiling softly, Sly made a magician's pass with one hand...and made a gold ring with a diamond surrounded by tanzanite and citrine shards, the blue and orange of their own colors, appear. "I remember how much I love you," he whispered softly, "and that I can't live without you...not anymore."

I was at the other end of the house when Dad pulled out the ring, and I still heard Mom's reaction.

I also heard what came after. As soon as they were asleep, I called Uncle Scrooge about soundproofing my room.

Author's Note

Thank you Kenshinryuu.

What Was Broken

While Dad's memory was still slow to come back, the bonds he'd forged were now remembered. As such, we spent the next few years slowly reintroducing him to everyone he used to know, watching as that slowly began to bring back associated memories. The happiest moment had to be when Murray and Bentley joined Sly at Uncle Scrooge's mansion for one of their classic video game sessions. For that moment, as Mom, Penelope, and I watched, it was just like it had always been, as though nothing had ever changed.

Surprisingly enough, it was Uncle Scrooge who brought that to an end...

As yet another game ended without a clear victor, Scrooge cleared his throat to get attention. "Bentley, your appointment."

"Oh, right!" Bentley responded, his expression excited and nervous. Setting his controller down, he took the controls of his wheelchair and turned to leave.

"Appointment?" Sly asked in confusion.

"I really wish I could be there with you, Bentley," Penelope spoke up softly. "I mean..." Her words faded as she rested a hand on Bentley's shoulder.

Bentley smiled as he looked up at her, placing his hand on hers. As their work and time together had progressed over the years, both had grown and changed. While Bentley still went with his usual wardrobe - all he could deal with from the wheelchair - Penelope had traded her overalls for a yellow jumpsuit that fit her quite well to show how she'd grown. She'd also traded glasses for orange safety goggles, and her braids for a long ponytail. "It's alright, Penelope," he said softly, taking her hand to his lips to kiss it. "Mr. McDuck got the best doctors for this, and the treatment's tested out fine. I'll be fine."

"Doctors?" Coco asked in confusion.

"Treatment?" Carmelita added worriedly.

"Bentley...what's going on?" Murray pressed, staring at his old friend nervously. "Are you...sick?"

Bentley chuckled softly. "Spinal reconstruction," he explained softly. "The goal of these treatments is to improve my mobility...and hopefully eventually let me get up out of this chair, permanently." He smiled at the shocked looks. "Well, the time machine Penelope and I have been working on is nearing completion...it'd be fitting if my first steps into this unknown frontier...were actual steps."

Sly and Murray quickly moved to Bentley's sides, the trio sharing a brotherly hug as they saw him off. Coco noticed that Penelope seemed oddly conflicted as she watched. Hopping down, she decided to try and help. After all, all signs suggested she'd be her aunt before too much longer. "Wanna talk about it?" she asked curiously.

Penelope jumped at the approach. Turning, she stared down at Coco for a time...then sighed. "In private, okay?"

Nodding, Coco turned to lead Penelope to another room while Bentley was led to the car to head for his treatment. Once they were both seated, she looked up at the mouse girl. "Something's bothering you, I can tell. And it has something to do with Uncle Bentley. It's...not 'trouble in paradise', is it?"

Penelope shook her head. "No, nothing like that." She leaned back, staring up at the ceiling in thought. "It's just...this is probably going to sound silly, but it feels like Sly's holding Bentley back."

"Huh?" Coco asked in confusion. "How can that be? They haven't even spent time together in a while."

"Well...we've had a lot of sidelines in development while working towards the time machine," Penelope explained. "A lot of it...dangerous. We could make a fortune - both in terms of money and criminal political power - if we were to take those developments into arms manufacture. And there are other things we could get into that would be...amazing and fun, but Bentley won't hear of it." She shook her head. "I love him...but it feels like Sly's moral code is holding him back from his full potential." She looked towards Coco. "Does that make any sense?"

Coco frowned, rubbing her head with one hoof. "Not...really?"

Penelope sighed. "Yeah, I didn't think you-"

"I mean, it always seemed like pulling teeth to get Bentley to break the law in new ways, when Dad would jump right in as long as it wasn't hurting anyone innocent. Seems more like Uncle Bentley is holding Dad back in that way of thinking." Coco shook her head. "But that doesn't really make sense either, you know?"

Penelope blinked in shock. "Wait...you mean Bentley's even more morally centered by nature than Sly?"

"Well, yeah!" Coco confirmed. "Uncle Bentley always told me stories about the early years with Dad. He was super straight laced back then, always toeing the line of the rules cause that was what got kids adopted. But because he was tiny, nerdy, and weak, he was always overlooked and shuffled from orphanage to orphanage when the bullying got too bad. And Uncle Murray had the same problems cause he was too big and not very fit, except he was shuffled around because he got into fights. If Dad hadn't been there, Uncle Murray probably would have wound up bullying Uncle Bentley, and Uncle Bentley would have grown up as some office worker statistic, just pushing whatever buttons he was supposed to on the computer when he was supposed to with his only release being fantasies of crazy adventures starting with his coworkers mysteriously vanishing." She grinned happily. "Dad was just remembering those times, talking about how he and Uncle Murray always had to cajole Uncle Bentley into each new mischief beyond just planning their antics, convincing him how fun it would be." She paused as she noticed Penelope's face go pale. "Penelope?"

"...I'll be right back," Penelope responded as she stood up. "There's...there's something I need to go take care of, and fast." With that, she turned and ran out of the mansion.

I don't know what it was, but Penelope never came back after that. We were all really worried about her, but we figured she'd be back in a few days, or contact us...or at least Bentley. But a few other things quickly leapt to the forefront of our attention.

One thing of great importance, though, was the Thievius Raccoonus. The writing in the book...was vanishing.

Time Out: Preparing

As soon as we got the message from Bentley, Dad moved to go meet up with him. I tagged along, worried about what the message could mean. Mom was out on assignment when we got the message, so she couldn't join us then. For a moment, it felt just like how it had all started out...but I was older and wiser now. And I had opinions to share.

Now if only that meant anyone listened to me...

"The pages are disappearing?" Sly demanded of Bentley as the four of them sat down.

"Not the pages themselves," Bentley corrected, "but the writing on them. From what I've been able to determine, someone is messing with time to specifically erase the Cooper Clan's history. Given how intimately involved in history the Cooper Clan has been behind the scenes with what I saw about the various ancestors while researching the book, the consequences could be disastrous for the entire world! We need to find whoever's making these changes and stop them."

"But wouldn't that mean going through time?" Murray asked curiously.

"That it will," Bentley confirmed, turning to wheel his chair over to a covered pile of equipment he'd brought with him from his lab to the old Paris hideout where they were meeting. While he was able to move with a great deal less pain than before and had more movement with his back, the treatments had not yet fully restored his spine. He couldn't leave his chair yet. "Which is why I've come up with a solution, the very project Penelope and I were working on before she...went missing."

As Bentley reached for the cover, Coco blinked. For a brief moment, it seemed like Bentley wasn't there anymore. It looked like a chicken stood in his place, a tall skinny chicken in overalls and glasses looking somewhat elderly. She'd never met the chicken before...and yet in that moment she felt she knew him, and great sadness. The moment passed as Bentley pulled the cover back, revealing a large clock face with a great deal of technological parts built into it. "Behold the time machine!" Bentley declared proudly. "The original planned model could take us to any date just by inputting it...but as our goal here is to undo changes to the timeline, I tweaked it to instead hunt down alterations in the timeline. To do so, it needs artifacts from the eras where time has been altered, which we'll be able to determine due to the high concentration of chroniton radiation within the artifact due to the temporal disruption. I've also designed a system to scan the Thievius Raccoonus for the source point of changes, so we can know what artifacts to look for."

"That's amazing, Bentley!" Sly praised. "Any idea what artifact we should go after first?"

"There's a priceless 17th century Japanese dagger stored here in a museum owned by a skunk named La Paradox," Bentley explained readily, showing an image of the artifact in question. He paused, noticing that both Sly and Coco had stiffened. "Is there something you both want to say?" he asked curiously.

Sly rubbed the back of his head. "Well...as my memory has started to come back, I've been...getting the urge to pull another heist," he explained. "I'd been trying to keep it in check, but...I guess once a thief, always a thief. I'd gathered enough information to determine that La Paradox was a real crook, and had pinned him as the target of my heist...hitting that museum. I've been secretly casing it the past few weeks..." He cleared his throat carefully. "When Carmelita and I haven't been...otherwise occupied." That got a chuckle from Murray.

"Well that's convenient," Bentley offered with a playful grin.

"More like ironic," Coco grumbled irritably. "Investigating La Paradox - and that museum in particular - is the assignment Mom is on that meant she wasn't with us to get the message to come to this meeting!"

"Definitely not convenient," Sly murmured worriedly. "That means we need to complete the heist tonight, probably dodging Carmelita the entire way-OW!" He winced and rubbed his side as Coco withdrew the butt of her cane. "Coco!"

"Seriously, Dad?" Coco demanded angrily. "I may not know the law as well as you, but I'm pretty sure messing with the time stream like this is a crime. Infringing your civil liberties minimum, probably world terrorism on top of that. And Mom's used to working with you to deal with worse criminals. If you've got the information that La Paradox is that bad, tell her you're doing a job and she'll plan around you, just like when we were going after the Klaaw Gang! The deal from back then is still in effect, even if you are engaged now!"

"And if we go that way, the bond between us will be obvious," Sly replied firmly. "If whoever's doing this is out to erase my family's past, what makes you think they won't work to erase the future? Or work on Carmelita's family history while they're at it just to make things harder?"

Coco frowned irritably. "Dad, that sounds completely nuts. You know that, right?"

"We are dealing with someone trying to attack us through time," Sly countered. "They are nuts."

"And you think Mom will accept you running a heist under her nose without you telling her?" Coco pointed out aggressively.

"Better to beg forgiveness than ask permission this time," Sly insisted firmly.

"While you two sort this out, I'm going to help Murray install the time machine in the van," Bentley spoke up calmly. "To get the time machine as mobile as we need it, I had to design it to work around a moving vehicle, generating the quantum fields when it hits the right speed." He glanced between parent and child as they glowered at each other, then sighed and wheeled after Murray. "And no one's listening to make an 88 miles per hour joke..."

Dad stayed completely firm on not telling Mom, and nothing I could say would sway him on that. He was dead set that he would not tell Mom about the job.

...so I told her anyway myself. Like Dad said, better for me to beg his forgiveness instead of asking permission. After all, Dad still wasn't telling her anything.

Time Out: The Heist

The plan to get into the museum to get the dagger was rather classic. Uncle Murray got into place where he could use his muscle. Uncle Bentley went through the sewers to get an access point to the security networks. Dad and I went via the rooftops, dodging security choppers. While Dad had trouble and needed to duck behind cover, I'd been practicing with both magic and Cooper family techniques for quite some time. I could now activate my invisibility in a split second, as long as I was standing perfectly still. Combining that with the Slow Time technique that enhanced my reflexes to the point time seemed to slow made it next to impossible for the choppers to catch me. Deik-Beck stuck close to Sly, making his own way across the rooftops and dropping in the form of some metal junk if the spotlight swung his way.

As we went, Bentley called out reminders to Dad of his various skills and abilities as a Master Thief via the binocucom, just in case he didn't remember one in particular. Understandable, since Dad admitted himself that there were still holes in his memory. It was rather fun.

Sly continued his careful hops from spire to spire, Coco and Deik-Beck following him. After a time, he took a glance off to the side as they landed on a rope they could walk up to a new rooftop...and saw Murray, riding atop one of La Paradox's trucks up to the entrance of the museum. "That was...not his entrance strategy," Sly pointed out dryly.

"Looks fun, though!" Coco piped up happily, giggling as they watched. "And he is in position now," she added as she leapt over Sly to go further up the rope to the next roof.

Rolling his eyes, Sly followed along before once more taking the lead. As they continued, security started to get tighter, though it remained less than a challenge for the trio. "It feels good to be doing this again," Sly murmured thoughtfully to himself. "Doubt Carmelita would be accepting of it, though."

"You might be surprised," Coco murmured thoughtfully, keeping her voice low. Deik-Beck clicked a few times in a silent giggle. He'd been the one directing Coco's call to Carmelita when she'd told her about the planned heist. He knew what had been said.

After a bit more hopping along spires, the trio was forced to detour as security choppers began actively patrolling areas that would allow a Cooper approach, specifically the ropes that Sly and Coco were actively using. "That was too close," Sly murmured as they dropped down into cover.

"I don't like this," Coco murmured softly. "We've had bad experiences any time someone was specifically prepared for Coopers. Seft and Neyla weren't pushovers, and did us a lot of damage..."

Sly nodded, bracing himself. "...if you say so," he admitted finally.

Coco lowered her eyes. She hadn't realized that was part of his past Sly hadn't recalled yet. Probably something his mind was specifically avoiding, for any number of reasons. She instead silently followed as he made his way to a flagpole...only for it to fall as he shimmied up it, creating a bridge back to the roof Coco was on. "...guess I'm a little out of practice," he murmured apologetically.

"Too much rich food, not enough exercise for anywhere but the hips?" Coco offered teasingly.

Sly frowned irritably. "You are much too young to be making jokes like that," he chided firmly.

"I just turned 13, Dad," Coco pointed out dryly. "Be lucky this heist came up now. Otherwise I might be heading out and bringing home boys instead of loot." At Sly's stunned expression, she smirked and decided to really push his buttons. "Or maybe girls. I haven't really thought about that part of my life yet. Then again, there are some species who are both at the same time, or so I've heard..."

"Nope nope nope nope nope!" Sly repeated to himself as he raced off towards the museum, making Coco burst into giggles again.

Before long, the pair reached the skylight that was their intended entrance. A single guard stood before it with their backs to them, a rat-person dressed in a skin-tight hazmat suit complete with gas mask. Coco frowned as she caught sight of this. "There's nowhere I can slip a needle in..."

"Still prepared for us," Sly murmured darkly. "I'm not liking the looks of this-"

Their words were cut off as Deik-Beck scampered up behind the rat and drove a single pointed leg into the base of the rat's tail, sending him tumbling over as the little bot pulled back the skylight key. "Drive in deeper!" he declared, showing how the leg had reshaped into an extra-long and sharp hypodermic needle.

"Good work, Deik-Beck!" Coco praised happily.

With us in place, we just had to wait for Uncle Bentley to shut down the security lasers so we could rappel down and grab the dagger. It was a longer wait than expected, both because Uncle Bentley himself was out of practice when it came to thieving, and because - much like on our approach - security seemed designed specifically to take our usual tactics into account to catch us unaware.

Uncle Murray ran into a similar trap. It seemed almost as though the security were designed based off reports of us, but by someone who'd never actually seen us in action leading to the designs underestimating us. What was impossible to tell was whether said underestimation was luck...or design.

Still, the security system was successfully disabled, and Dad and I slipped down to swipe the dagger. However, just as Dad was placing the calling card...

"You didn't really think you could get away with it, did you ringtail?" Carmelita called out as she opened the door, her new shock pistol leveled right at Sly.

Sly swallowed as he caught sight of her. She'd chosen a different outfit, possibly specifically after Coco's call. She still wore the same jacket and boots...but in place of her previous top and jeans, she now wore a blue tube top that shaped to her so well it was practically a strapless bikini top, and a blue mini-skirt held up by a black belt with a gold buckle, drawing the eye to her flat stomach and shapely legs. "H-hey Carmelita," he managed to greet as he hid the dagger behind his back. "Fancy meeting you-"

"Coco called and told me everything," Carmelita pointed out flatly.

"Aw, Mom!" Coco complained. "Why'd you snitch on me?"

"So Sly can know why I need you all to escape via the southern exit," Carmelita responded. "That's his private warehouse, which isn't open to public officials."

"...what?" Sly asked in confusion.

"The first thing Mom said when I told her you were planning a heist here was, 'It's about time'," Coco explained with a giggle. "She knew you'd been casing the place, and was counting on chasing you to get her the evidence she needed to act against La Paradox."

"Don't worry, I'll be careful," Carmelita promised. "Time manipulation's no joke. I'm not about to take any chances...even if you are in trouble for trying to pull this without telling me."

Sly crossed his arms defensively. "I'm not going to apologize for trying to protect you," he pointed out flatly.

"In that case, I won't punish you for your 'misdeed'," Carmelita countered teasingly.

"...I am so glad I bugged Uncle Scrooge into soundproofing my room," Coco murmured softly as she and Sly shot back to the roof.

After a rather more intense getaway than usual given Mom's request to open a path into that warehouse, we reached a straightaway where Uncle Murray was able to build up enough speed to trigger the time machine. Thankfully, even if we were travelling through time, Uncle Bentley'd found a way to keep in contact even through time...an offshoot of the Time Travel tech that used linked devices that communicated via two halves of a split chroniton, which resonated in response to influence on the opposite halves.

Of course, we needed someone who was reliable and could track alterations to the time stream without being affected...which meant someone with magic strong enough to resist the influence of the time stream. I always knew my time babysitting Felicia would go to good use. She'd already researched a time displacement circle before we'd even approached her. On top of that, she was the perfect one to track changes to the Thievius Raccoonus, since I'd given her a copy to read through once that she'd kept inside said circle, so it wasn't being changed. Between that and her book on time magic, she'd be the perfect contact.

Now if only the trip through the time stream hadn't been so trippy to me. It did not agree with my magic.

Time Out: The Ninja Way

When we arrived in ancient Japan, we knew we were looking for Rioichi Cooper, one of the biggest names in the Thievius Raccoonus. Not only was he an expert ninja, but also the inventor of sushi. He would certainly be interesting to meet. I just hope he wouldn't hold it against me that I couldn't stomach his creation.

Rioichi was supposed to be in his sushi restaurant that doubled as his base of operations as a ninja, but the shop was closed up tight. On top of that, the 'happy town' was a grimly patrolled base, and Rioichi himself locked up tight in a new 'high security' prison. Like we'd thought, someone here was playing games with time, and we needed to step in and fix it. The first thing we had to do was free Rioichi.

As usual, the first step was getting some photos(1).

Sly and Coco made their way up to and across the rooftops of the small Japanese village, the sloping roofs providing plenty of places to run along and leap from, almost as though they had been designed with Cooper family techniques in mind. Considering the village had become a grand place to live because of Rioichi's sushi restaurant and imitation was common in architecture, it was entirely possible it was.

As they moved, they went over the list of things Bentley had told them they needed pictures of. "I'll take the restaurant and the guard armor," Coco suggested. "You're still out of practice, and I'm better at hiding in plain sight anyway. The other places you'll have an easy time snapping pictures from a distance."

"Fair enough," Sly allowed. "Just be careful."

"That's what I was about to say," Coco complained playfully as they split up.

While Sly moved around the city to take pictures, Coco went straight into the climbing vines at the sides of the river bridges to make her way towards the restaurant. It didn't take her long to get there, snapping a picture of the tall dark building, and the boar samurai standing guard in front of it. On her way back, she hesitated as she spotted a sign for the local Geisha House. Noticing her stare, Deik-Beck turned to her. "Coco want geisha?" Deik-Beck suggested impishly.

"Since when did ancient Japan have neon signs?" Coco asked curiously, holding up her camera to snap a photo. It wasn't on the list, but she was fairly certain Bentley would want a picture of something so odd.

As she lowered her camera, a tall tiger stepped out of the house looking disgruntled. The black gi decorated with gold insignia and swords strapped to his back made him look like a powerful local...but the Cuban cigar he was smoking told Coco he was anything but. Not only that, she recognized him from Carmelita's files. "What is El Jefe doing here?" she asked darkly. El Jefe was a mercenary general who'd overthrown several small countries, and high up on Interpol's wanted list.

Putting her camera away, she raced to rejoin Sly and the others at the hideout.

Uncle Bentley concluded from the photos that our only way into the prison to get Rioichi out was through the front gate, and that meant being disguised as Samurai guards. That meant we had to get a suit of armor for Dad, and I needed to try and sneak in while invisible behind him and hope that didn't trip anything. Dad managed it by filching pieces from the various boar samurai scattered around the town...then bringing them back to me to reshape them to fit him. The last thing we wanted was for Dad to get busted due to an ill-fitting uniform. It would be just our luck if El Jefe was in charge and had read the Overlord List...

While I was at it, I even made him a shield based on what I'd seen, slipping some mechanisms into it. It just might prove useful. I also made sure the armor would completely protect Dad from fire, just in case. Dad thankfully didn't have any trouble getting past the guard at the gate. I just wish he hadn't used Muggshot's name when he did so. I was afraid that would come back and bite us...

Coco carefully followed along behind Sly as he marched through the halls of the prison, following the most guarded path in search of Rioichi while using the samurai armor disguise to avoid the guard's notice. Coco turned away from the sight of a few prisoners bound to mechanized tables, refusing to allow her mind to speculate the purpose. They didn't have time to free everyone. They needed to find Rioichi.

Thankfully, it wasn't long before they spotted Rioichi. The brown furred, blue garbed raccoon was in a cage suspended over a pit of water. "Rioichi!" Sly called out. "Are you okay?"

Rioichi rolled his eyes. "You guards all make very poor jokes," he chided, his voice rough and gravelly. Coco couldn't help but think it sounded like one of her favorite cartoon characters, an old rat that had taught turtles ninjutsu.

"C'mon!" Sly pleaded. "I'm not one of those bozos!"

Seeing what he planned, Coco spoke up. "Dad! Keep your armor on so no one suspects anything. I'll see about getting him free."

Rioichi's eyes widened. "Who is there? I hear voice, but see no one."

"My daughter," Sly explained. "She's around here..." He glanced around, trying to spot her, but seeing nothing. "Somewhere. She's really good at that."

"Ah, I see!" Rioichi declared eagerly. "Fellow ninja! And a kunoichi of such skill is your offspring? I am impressed. Tell me, by chance is she yet betrothed?"

Sly and Coco both choked at that. "She's only 13!" Sly finally managed to say.

"And you haven't betrothed her yet?" Rioichi gasped in shock. "You are a very irresponsible father! Do you care nothing for her reputation and virtue? You won't be able to get a good match for her if you wait too much longer, and then where will she be?"

"...wow, things are different than back home," Coco marveled, doing her best not to laugh.

Rioichi turned to the sound of her voice. "Fair maiden of shadows, if your face and body are even pale shadows of your voice and skills, then you are truly the jewel of your father's house. I myself am still in the prime of my life, and with your father's permission would gladly woo you should you be of the wild persuasion as some kunoichi are, refusing the strict regulations of society on your behavior."

"This is so wrong on so many levels..." Sly groaned with a shudder.

"You are right, this is not the time," Rioichi agreed. "If you wish to release me, you must ascend to the Dragon Bridge."

"Or I could just slide down this chain," Coco spoke up from near the roof of the cavern. A quick slide down, and she was at the cage itself. "Now to get the cage open without alerting anyone." Positioning herself atop the cage, she dropped her invisibility as she took aim with her needles. With one throw, all caught the guards on the dragon bridge in the necks, sending them slumping into unconsciousness.

"The jewel of your house is as beautiful as she is skilled," Rioichi marveled in pleasure as Coco picked the cage lock. "But how did you reach the chain without ascending the bridge?"

"I climbed up the wall," Coco explained. "Strong earth magic, stone walls...it was really easy. I'm Coco Cooper, by the way."

Rioichi paused. "...I have been flirting with my many generations removed granddaughter, haven't I?" he concluded awkwardly. "No wonder your father was distressed."

Coco giggled wickedly. "Not only that, in our time girls are free to find their own relationships, and I'm of the age to start dating. Dad's really freaked out by that."

"What manner of maid did he wed to sire you?" Rioichi asked curiously as they began the climb up, with Sly heading out the front gate again.

"It's a long story," Coco replied warmly. "We'll tell you about it if we have time when we meet back with the others."

(1) While the clue bottle safes return in this game, the four treasures either have no use in story format or cause problems with overall plot, and as such will be ignored.

Time Out: Family Ties

Once we managed to get Rioichi back to the hideout, we began planning our next move. We didn't really have time yet to give him the whole story, as things in the village were especially tense. We were, however, able to get more information about El Jefe. He was apparently even worse than I knew, having conquered or overthrown many countries for the highest bidder...and a true tactical genius. As I listened to his full profile, I couldn't help but think this was someone Seft would love to have under his banner...or possibly see as a rival.

We decided to start by getting a better base of operations if we could...and that meant retaking Rioichi's sushi shop. Rioichi was the only one who knew the inside, so that meant getting him in through the front door. Easy enough, with Dad using the armor to fake out the guards...but we were all in for a surprise at what happened inside...

Once Rioichi was inside, he pulled up his hood before retrieving his cane from under the rug at the front door. He had hated leaving it behind as he didn't feel complete - as a ninja or as a Cooper - without it, but it was better for it to be here waiting for him than in the hands of his enemies, and at the time capture was inevitable. Unlike young Sly's cane, Rioichi's was carved from a single piece of wood, with a secondary, smaller hook at the other end...and was actually two double-ended canes that could be held as one, hiding a second weapon completely.

With his weapon retrieved, he prepared to move forward. A brief message from Bentley showed him that even in the far future, the ancient ways of the Cooper ninjas were impressive. He then practiced his special technique to refresh his skills. By gathering his inner energy from atop a spire, he was able to launch himself great distances swiftly and silently, as long as there was a point where he could land at the opposite side.

Bentley's information revealed to him that the guards had his sushi knives, which were the keys to his ninja hideout within the shop. He would have to retrieve all three in order to gain access to each of the three doors. His pickpocketing skills proved to be more than up to the challenge as he filched the knives from each of the first two guards as he went, the future security devices he'd never encountered before proving confusing but not actually troubling. Much like any other security measure he'd ever encountered, 'not touching' proved the appropriate approach to dealing with it.

The last knife was more difficult to retrieve. The first chamber was patrolled by three guards, none of which carried the knife. Getting past them without alerting them proved a minor challenge for Rioichi, but a true ninja - which he was - was trained to handle challenges far greater than 'minor'. Once past the last security, he moved to pickpocket the last guard...only to find him investigating the door into Rioichi's true base within the restaurant, the kitchen.

As Rioichi approached, his eyes widened. From inside the kitchen, he could hear what sounded like small explosions...and an angry female? Moving quickly, he filched the knife from the guard before dispatching him so he would not interfere. Placing the knife in the door, he stood back as it opened...his jaw dropping at what he saw within.

Standing in his kitchen was the most beautiful, voluptuous vixen he had ever laid eyes on! Her curves were absolutely breathtaking, and the flex of her limbs showed firm muscle, a body that would put the kunoichi he had met in his time to shame. Her long hair accentuated both body and lovely face, and her stance showed she absolutely knew how to fight. Though the weapon she held was unknown to him, it was her outfit that caught and held his attention for how...scandalous it was. Even the kunoichi trained specifically for infiltration and information retrieval - who got information out of lords within the bedchamber - might balk at showing so much skin in public. Rioichi felt his mouth go dry as he tried to find a safe place to rest his eyes.

The woman spun towards him, leveling the weapon at him...only to lower it as she got a better look at him, a loving smile appearing on her face. "Cooper," she murmured warmly, her voice a sensuous purr. "Boy is it a relief to see you. I wasn't sure how I'd get a message to you."

"Though I do not know you yet, beautiful maiden, that is a deficiency I would desire to correct immediately," Rioichi responded quickly. "Perhaps over dinner I can make for you right here?"

The woman's expression suddenly hardened. "Wait a minute...you aren't Sly!" Her weapon once more came up.

Rioichi felt both relieved and awkward. Many things were explained...even if even more questions were raised. "Ah, I had wondered from whom the young maiden had learned her feminine wiles. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Rioichi Cooper. If you will allow me to activate my kitchen, I can reunite you with my descendants, Sly and Coco. I believe it is they whom you are searching for?"

The woman lowered her weapon in relief. "Thank goodness I'm in the right time period, then." She lifted a strange device in her other hand. "Knew it was a risk grabbing this 'Quantum Shift Beacon' to get away when I didn't know how to program or use it."

Nodding even though he didn't follow what she was saying, Rioichi stepped forward and pulled the lever in the center of his kitchen. The ovens blazed, sending heat and light through the massive dragon/fish that adorned the wall of his shop, the noise and light sending the guards working for El Jefe scurrying out of the shop.

As they waited for the noise to die down enough to reunite with the others, Rioichi turned to the vixen. "So tell me, how did young Sly manage to win the affections of such a gorgeous kitsune?" he asked playfully. "And might I know her name?"

The woman rolled her eyes at the flattery. "It's a long story. I'm Carmelita Fox."

Rioichi blinked in surprise. "Not...Cooper?"

"No," Carmelita confirmed. "We aren't married...yet."

"Then...you are not young Coco's mother?"

"Oh, I most definitely am," Carmelita insisted firmly.

"...I am very confused..."

Rioichi didn't know the half of it.

Time Out: Just a Jump

Once things had quieted down, Rioichi led Carmelita back to the hideout. As soon as they caught sight of each other, Sly and Carmelita rushed forward into a very passionate embrace and kiss, plainly overjoyed to see each other again. Rioichi smiled as he saw this. "So...you are not married?" he asked playfully.

"Not yet!" Coco piped up, pointing to the ring on Carmelita's finger. "Hopefully soon, though."

"Then perhaps you could explain how it is that they are both your parents?" Rioichi inquired curiously, kneeling down to Coco's level.

"Oh, I'm adopted," Coco explained.

"Oh?" Rioichi purred. "Was the adoption the result of rescuing you from a villain who sought to use your magical nature to conquer the higher plane from which you hail?"

Everyone turned to stare at Rioichi in shock. "How did you...?" Bentley finally managed to ask.

Rioichi rolled his eyes. "You act like it has never happened before. That's how most of the god-born of our country found their way into the families that became noble as a result of adopting them!" Noticing continued stares, he shook his head. "Your time has forgotten much, it seems..."

"How'd you even get here?" Sly asked Carmelita, trying to change the direction of the conversation to something he hoped would make sense and not make him feel foolish.

Carmelita held up the device in the hand not holding her shock pistol. It was a small sphere that looked like a grenade, but with a screen on one side and a button on top. It showed no sign of response, however. "Turns out you were 100% right about Le Paradox," she explained softly. "Not only was his warehouse chock full of stolen relics and all the evidence I could possibly have needed to take him down, he also has quite a few time travel related gadgets in addition to a blimp equipped with it. I managed to learn that much before I was cornered by his goons. I was outmatched and outgunned...and then I grabbed this thing. It was labeled as a Quantum Shift Beacon, and I activated in desperation when Le Paradox ordered the chamber gassed. Next thing I know, I'm in a kitchen somewhere and the Beacon is fried. I start trying to shoot my way out, and Splinter over here comes in and I almost mistake him for you."

"My name is Rioichi," the elder Cooper corrected with a frown as Coco giggled.

Bentley took hold of the device, cracking it open along a seam to examine the circuitry inside. "Fascinating...it's a time travel device in miniature! It seems to be the same overall tech design as my own machine, but much more portable and far less stable. Looks like it's good for one, maybe two jumps before it fries itself, and works on coordinate inputs. Without inputs, though...it probably set your destination to random. That's probably what fried the device." He looked up at Carmelita. "You could have wound up anywhere in time in space. It's dumb luck you wound up here safe, and not in the middle of the Big Bang!"

"The time energies didn't have enough to get her that far," Felicia suddenly spoke up as the quantum communicator hummed to life, projecting a holographic image of the gatordog appeared over the glowing crystal that was the focus of its circuitry. "I picked up the unexpected surge of time waves and recognized Coco's Mom's life energies bound up in them, so I worked a little spell to send her to Coco. Got the time right, but had to leave a wide margin for error on the space part to avoid tele-fragging."

"Thanks, Felicia!" Coco piped up happily. "It's good to have Mom here with us...as long as Dad remembers our hideouts aren't soundproof!" Sly and Carmelita both blushed brightly as Bentley, Murray, and Rioichi shared a guffaw.

"Glad it worked out," Felicia responded in relief. "Time magic's still pretty new to me. Speaking of, I need to renew my protections..." The signal faded out.

As everyone calmed down, Rioichi spoke up. "We need information before anything else. We must know what this El Jefe plans." Noticing surprised looks turned his way, he raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"We're just...surprised you're taking this all in stride so well," Murray explained. "I'm living through it, and I'm still a little off balance."

Rioichi sniffed disdainfully. "I am ninja. You act like this is the strangest thing to ever happen in my life."

"I...it's not?" Carmelita gasped out as Coco's eyes lit up, eager for the story.

"Of course it is!" Rioichi snapped back. "Still, that is no reason to stand around gawking, is it? I am ninja."

"Well, I actually have a plan as far as learning El Jefe's plans go," Bentley spoke up. "He's been seen visiting the geisha house extremely frequently, and that's the only time he comes out of the safehouse. However, the Madame of the house has just gone on vacation...but El Jefe doesn't know it yet." He turned to the whole group. "If Rioichi can slip in and steal her outfit, one of us can take her place and get information out of El Jefe."

"Then it's a good thing Mom's here, isn't it?" Coco asked impishly. "I mean, who else would wear it?"

"I could pull it off!" Murray spoke up eagerly. "Lemme go undercover, Sly! I won't let you down!"

"Don't you think El Jefe might...notice a male geisha?" Bentley offered delicately.

"I don't see why," Rioichi countered. "Quite a few young men enjoy taking the time to 'live as a woman' for a number of reasons, and working at a geisha house is a safe, controlled way to do so where one's masculinity can easily be concealed." He shrugged his shoulders. "While not my own pleasure, there are others in my clan who enjoy such pursuits...and they are quite popular."

Bentley's jaw hung briefly. "Oh, right. This is ancient Japan," he reminded himself. "Still, I think perhaps Coco is right and that Carmelita might be able to pull off the role better."

"It should be a decision of who can best handle the role," Rioichi pointed out. "Which of them do you think will do a better job being calm, demure, but with an awareness of authority?"

Silence greeted that question. After a time, Deik-Beck spoke up. "Demure? Coco only!"

"Why you!" Murray growled out angrily.

"What did you say you stupid machine?" Carmelita snapped out.

"QED!" Deik-Beck beeped out.

"El Jefe's had his encounters with Interpol before," Sly pointed out. "Would he recognize you, Carmelita?"

Carmelita rubbed her chin thoughtfully. "I'm not sure. We've never crossed paths directly, but he's known for researching his foes thoroughly..."

"I still think Carmelita will pull off being feminine better than Murray," Bentley spoke up. "For...certain obvious reasons."

"Hey!" Coco shouted out as it looked like it was about to come to another argument. "Either way, we need the clothes, right? So how about Grandpa goes and swipes them, and then we decide who goes undercover based on what size they are? Pretty sure he'd notice if the outfit suddenly didn't fit right."

"The young kunoichi speaks sense," Rioichi observed. "I shall retrieve the outfit immediately." With that, he turned and headed for the Geisha house.

Time Out: Duress for Success

After the performance, Mom was firmly placed in her role as 'the new geisha girl', with no one questioning anything about it. The only drawback to that was she couldn't leave the geisha house much, as she was constantly in demand for her shows. Uncle Murray was able to slip away as a result, freeing the rest of us to take care of a few other tasks in preparation for our eventual confrontation with El Jefe.

Uncle Murray and Uncle Bentley's first job involved helping Rioichi get his restaurant back on track...by getting him plenty of fish to make into sushi. I found myself a little envious that it wasn't a Father/Daughter fishing trip for me and Dad, but time was on the line. Maybe some other time.

The only thing that worried me as they left...for just a moment, I saw that old chicken-man instead of Bentley again. This time, I knew his name...Gyro Gearloose. He's a scientist that works for Uncle Scrooge. Why do I keep getting flashes of him in Bentley's place in the gang? And why does it always come with a sharp stab of sorrow? I can only hope I get answers...and that said answers aren't too painful.

Rioichi gathered some special plants with a sleep toxin more potent - and more native - than what I had for my needles. Beyond that, I was running low on my sleep potion, and the plants would help me refresh my supply as well as allowing us to make knock out sushi rolls as was apparently the plan.

This apparently played into some information Bentley got using an RC car to spy on El Jefe talking to himself...but the more important detail came from a conversation between El Jefe and Mom. As expected, her swiftly building reputation got his attention immediately...

Carmelita - in her Geisha disguise - had stepped out momentarily for a breath of fresh air. She was glad she'd kept her disguise, no matter how much she'd wanted to discard it, because she practically walked into El Jefe as she did. "Forgive me, My Lord," she offered quickly, bowing low. Despite what Deik-Beck claimed, she knew how to act the fearful maiden. She'd seen far too many in her line of work.

"Ah, so you are the new geisha I have heard so much about," El Jefe purred softly. "Though no one has yet made mention of your name..."

"I am...Kiyubi, if it pleases My Lord," Carmelita offered graciously. To her surprise, El Jefe bowed gallantly over her hand, kissing it like a gentleman...though not one of this era or region. Spying a scroll on his back, she quickly pilfered it and tossed it to where Bentley was waiting and watching.

"A charming name," El Jefe purred as he rose back up. His eyes seemed suspicious, but that faded as he caught sight of Carmelita's perfectly presented confused/flattered expression, a common born maiden unsure how to feel about the attention of a male so much her better. "Though not one common to the region."

"My family wanders, My Lord," Carmelita allowed delicately. "I have...only recently thought to make a permanent home..."

El Jefe's grin widened, his expression turning somewhat lecherous. "Perhaps you might honor me with a...private dance?" As he spoke, he trailed one finger along the visible edge of her inner kimono suggestively.

Inwardly, Carmelita seethed. She wanted nothing more right then than to knock his hand aside, whip out her shock blaster, and shoot him right in the crotch. However, not only was she unlikely to be successful, it would blow her cover. Besides, she had anticipated something like this and had a way she hoped would get her out of it. "You would not...dishonor a married woman, would you My Lord?" she asked, keeping her voice soft and timid...the exact tone that said she was desperate to escape the situation, but would accept it if she had to.

"A married woman, a geisha?" El Jefe asked in surprise, his striped ears twitching. "Your husband accepts this?"

"My husband is ill," Carmelita allowed sadly. "He cannot work. Without his work, our daughter cannot eat. I...I danced for coin at the tavern in our village, and Madame Geisha found me there before honorless men could take advantage. She brought me here, where it is safer, and I can earn coin for food and a healer..."

The story was artfully crafted, Carmelita thought. There were enough contrasts to her real life that she could put genuine emotion into it, and was plenty sympathetic as well. She doubted it would do more than dissuade a ruthless mercenary like El Jefe from misbehaving-

"Here," El Jefe spoke up suddenly, handing over a small bottle of pills and a bag full of coins, low denomination for the area. "The pills in the bottle will cure most illnesses of the area, and at the least ease your husband's symptoms enough he can take care of your daughter. The coin should be small enough denomination to be accepted anywhere around here."

Carmelita stared up at the man. His entire demeanor had changed, from ruthless mercenary to...something else. He looked...empathic. "M-My Lord, I-"

"Take it," El Jefe insisted. "I am ruthless, not heartless. See to your little one."

Carmelita lowered her eyes bashfully. "I...it is so much..." She looked up shyly through her lashes. "Won't you at least let me dance for you, My Lord? To show my gratitude?"

El Jefe smiled softly. "I would enjoy that." He then followed her into the Geisha House, and to the main stage.

Talk about unexpected. El Jefe has a soft side? Wonder what brought that on?

Still, the scroll was enlightening. Bentley's espionage on El Jefe revealed he was apparently working for someone, someone who wanted a package delivered. The scroll had a picture of Rioichi's cane. Given what Mom had said about how she got here, we could only assume El Jefe was working for Le Paradox, who wanted Rioichi Cooper's cane. We had no idea why, though. More information would be needed.

Time Out: Go Ninja Go

At this point we pulled Mom out of the Geisha House. Not only would it not fit her cover to remain there after El Jefe's 'gift' - which turned out to be exactly what he said it was with no traps or tricks hidden within, we checked - we had more than enough information to make our move now. We were going after the Dragon and Sword Gates. Mom and Dad would be going after the Dragon Gate, where the guards were already unconscious from the sleep-dosed sushi rolls Rioichi had made, clearing the path to the Sword Gate. Rioichi, Uncle Bentley, Uncle Murray and I would be hitting the Sword Gate, with Uncle Murray and Uncle Bentley tackling the guards - literally and figuratively - while Rioichi and I went for the gates themselves. Since Dad wasn't fully recovered from his amnesia, we were keeping him out of direct combat until we actually got to El Jefe in the palace. The last thing we wanted was a relapse in the middle of a time travel adventure. According to Felicia, contiguous memory was probably the only thing keeping us from accidentally unmaking ourselves through incautious action.

Before joining everyone else, I did ask Felicia about what I kept seeing with Bentley. I hoped she could explain it...

Felicia gnawed on her lower lip thoughtfully. "I don't know that much about time travel magic," she began, "but it kind of sounds like you have a Schrodinger situation on your hands."

"Schrodinger?" Coco asked curiously.

"He was a feline scientist who speculated on the nature of observation and phenomena," Felicia explained. "He had a theory that stated if you put a rat in a box with poisoned cheese and sealed the box to the outside world so none could observe, there were two possibilities. Either the rat would eat the poisoned cheese and die, or not and live. Ergo, until the box was opened, the rat was in a superposition of being alive and dead at the same time."

"What about the third possibility that the rat asphyxiates from being in a hermetically sealed environment with limited oxygen?" Coco pointed out.

Felicia shrugged. "No one ever said he was on the right track with that theory. However, it does work when applied to time travel...especially here. Something hasn't already happened yet that, if it does, will make it impossible for Bentley to have made this trip with you. If it happens, then Gyro Gearloose would have made the trip with you in control of the time machine. If not, then it's still Bentley."

"When you say 'impossible for him to go with us'..." Coco began nervously.

"Best not to think about it," Felicia cautioned. "Remember, contiguous memory."

That's all she'd say on the subject. It left me very nervous as we moved to storm El Jefe's palace. Storming the first gate went off without a hitch, but as we moved between the Dragon Gate and the Sword Gate...

As the group moved along the bridge between the gates, the seemingly solid structure began to rumble. As everyone shifted to get their balance, a massive dirigible slowly rose up between the soaring stone structures. It was colored grey and red, with fins to either side for some reason.

"That belongs to Le Paradox!" Carmelita hissed out fiercely. "I found the device that brought me here on it!"

"Then we should try to reach it for answers!" Sly insisted, leading the charge further.

To their surprise, the Sword Gate stood open, and El Jefe himself stood in front of it, laughing smugly. "End of the line, Coopers!" he called out challengingly. "Get them you fools!"

The Sword Gate slammed shut in front of him as several of Le Paradox's minions swarmed the bridge. Other than being confirmation of what Carmelita had said, however, this proved to actually be an easier challenge than it could have been. After all, none of the small troops were going to be able to hit Sly hard enough to risk his memory, and it gave Coco and Rioichi plenty of time to get under the wooden bridge and throw the switches to open the Sword Gate.

Once the gate was open, the group charged in...only for El Jefe to leap down from above the gate, pinning Rioichi to the ground before swiping his cane. "Ha!" he declared dismissively. "It's mine!"

"My cane!" Rioichi called out desperately.

Before anyone could react, El Jefe drew his twin swords and dragged them through the wooden bridge as he raced to the other side, collapsing most of the bridge and leaving the remaining sections on fire. "You lose, Coopers!" El Jefe called out. "I need to deliver this puny stick to a new owner!"

Only Dad and I were able to traverse the gap left behind...though not for lack of trying on Mom's part. It wasn't that she wasn't agile enough to make the jumps, though. It was the fact that the first jump led to her jumping right back to put out her tail.

Of course, even just crossing that gap wasn't enough. El Jefe had retreated to the top of his statue for a fight he felt was on his terms. When we actually got up there, it turned out El Jefe was at least somewhat skilled in magic...skilled enough, at any rate, that he was able to unleash fireballs and lightning from his twin swords. I kept my distance, trying to find a good opportunity to get him with a needle...but Dad charged in for a direct fight.

I was glad to see Dad hadn't lost his combat skills, and gladder still to see he wasn't bothering with trash talking, saving his focus for keeping himself alive. His lack of chatter seemed to confuse El Jefe, though. It wasn't long before he had El Jefe on the ropes...and then he did something that surprised me.

As El Jefe struggled to breathe under Sly's onslaught, he readied his swords for one last attack. It was becoming hard to channel the lightning and fire, and it wouldn't be long before he wouldn't be able to. Still, he had taken this contract, and he would see it through to the end.

Sly suddenly lowered his cane. "You can back off, El Jefe," he stated flatly. "I have no personal quarrel with you. Give me back Rioichi's cane, and you can leave."

"What?" El Jefe demanded angrily. "Why would you let an opponent leave without crushing them?"

"Because I'm ruthless, not heartless," Sly stated flatly. "Just like you."

El Jefe's eyes widened in shock. He then chuckled darkly. "So I was tricked then too, was I? You think you can identify with me after tricking me-"

"That was my fiance in that disguise," Sly interrupted. "The illness she spoke of was my amnesia, which I'm still recovering from. Our daughter lost her appetite worrying over me."

El Jefe stared at him, silenced.

"What motivates you, El Jefe?" Sly asked curiously. "What drives you? What is in the present so important you'd take a job to conquer the past?"

El Jefe lowered his blades. "...some distance south of the Panda King's lands, there is a dojo on a mountaintop," he explained softly. "It is run by an ancient tortoise and a wise red panda. Most of the money I make goes to keeping that dojo and the community built up around it running...because I entrusted my daughter to their care, and I want her to have a future I could not give her."

Sly stared in shock. "What do you mean?"

El Jefe chuckled darkly. "A mercenary who overthrows countries for the highest bidder...what kind of father is that? Especially when the mother was a nameless slave I dallied with after overthrowing such a country while waiting to hand over the country to the bidder? She does not know this of her origins, and as far as I am concerned she never will! Better she have a clean slate and a safe place to grow than what she would have if she knew me!" He lifted his swords once more. "I will not yield here, Cooper! I have too much at stake!"

"You aren't the only one," Sly replied as he readied his cane for the battle. "But you won't win."

"We shall see!" El Jefe began to gather fire and lightning in his swords at once...a dangerous technique that drained his vital energy, but the only one he had left.

"I'll keep an eye on that place if I'm the one who returns safe to the present," Sly promised as he braced himself.

El Jefe blinked in surprise. He had not expected that statement. Then again...ruthless, not heartless. He raised his swords to strike...only to hear a tinkling of a glass container dropping onto the wood. Glancing down, he recognized Le Paradox's label. With a roar, he brought both swords down onto the platform, releasing a discharge that sent Sly flying back off of it.

The capsule erupted, releasing its deadly compound. El Jefe focused, slowing his heartbeat as much as he could. If he could just...keep himself...from breathing too much...it would...disi...pate...

Le Paradox's troops swiped the cane before Dad or I could get close enough to do anything. Thankfully, they dropped something on their way out...a sheriff's star, showing signs of coming from the 1880's, in the Old West. Tennessee Kid Cooper.

That story would wait for another time, though. First we took El Jefe back to the present. He'd managed to survive the toxin just barely...but he seemed to have no memory of who he was, or what he had been. We contacted the Panda King, hoping he could help us.

He was apparently aware of the settlement El Jefe had talked about, and the dojo. With a little help, he found a noodle shop whose owner - a goose - was in need of a new assistant. It seemed a good place for the blank slate El Jefe had become to rebuild.

Time Out: Recruitment

As we made preparations to go to the next era Le Paradox was messing with, Mom raised a point that we were all forced to consider...mostly because she refused to let it go...

"I think we need more backup with this," Carmelita spoke up as Bentley continued to make tweaks to the time machine for the next jump.

"You don't think we can handle this on our own?" Sly asked teasingly.

"I don't think we should risk it," Carmelita pointed out flatly. "We're dealing with someone who's making plans that involve messing with time, and specifically targeting the Cooper family. Do we really want to risk how much he already knows about us, and what he might have set up to counter us in other eras? Not to mention he's in the air, and last I checked we didn't have a plane."

"I could modify the van to fly," Bentley allowed thoughtfully. "It can easily get the speed it would need for that, though getting the energy for that and the time machine might be difficult..."

"Wouldn't it make more sense to get some help that came with a plane?" Carmelita pointed out. "One that has survived time travel before and has a slew of weapons to help us out in other eras? Not to mention some skilled fighters to help us out? Ones who wouldn't blink twice at working with a family of thieves if it meant saving the world?"

"You know where to find something like that?" Coco asked curiously.

"I do," Carmelita confirmed. "We'll just need to make a detour before we make our time jump, and we'll have all the backup we need." She walked over to Murray. "How fast can you get us to Megakat City?"

It didn't take long to get to the City Mom mentioned. While Dad had never pulled a caper there for some reason, I had heard of it. It was almost as infamous as St. Canard as far as crime, but where St. Canard was all but ruled by criminals, Megakat City kept its criminal element firmly in check...along with its regular supply of monsters and kaiju. Once we were there, though, Mom insisted on going in alone to get the recruits she needed. Dad assumed it was an Interpol thing. He was wrong.

Deputy Mayor Callie Briggs glanced up from the paperwork on her desk as she saw the vixen sweep into her office. She recognized her instantly, and could only pray whatever brought her to Megakat City wouldn't mean more headaches for the Mayor's office that she'd have to deal with. "Can I help you?" she asked calmly.

"I hope you can," Carmelita offered softly. "I'm-"

"I know who you are, Inspector Fox," Callie interrupted. "Your 'pursuit' of Sly Cooper has made you rather famous - and infamous - beyond Interpol." She was pleased to see the Interpol agent wince. She always preferred to keep law enforcement from outside the city off-balance until she got the measure of them. "Now I have to wonder what business brings you here to this city...and to this office as opposed to Commander Feral's."

She did not like the smirk she got in response. "I understand you can put me in contact with the SWAT Kats."

Callie blinked, but managed to maintain her stoic expression otherwise. "I don't know what you've heard, but this office has no connection with vigilantes, no matter how honorable they've been or how many times they've saved the city. Official policy is still-"

"I didn't come to ask the Deputy Mayor to put me in contact with them," Carmelita interrupted. "I came to ask you, Callie Briggs, to put me in contact with them. And don't bother trying to deny it. I know you keep the emergency comm line in your purse."

Callie frowned, but changed tactics. "Why do you want to get in contact with them?" she asked carefully. "They've never been active outside of Megakat City-"

"Except when they were active in Megalith City 800 years ago," Carmelita pointed out. "But this isn't Interpol business that brings me here. Now are you going to help me, or do I have to blow up a building to get their attention?"

Callie sighed as she reached into her purse. "If you tell anyone..." she began as she pulled out the small, triangular communicator.

"You aren't the only one who skirts the law to uphold it," Carmelita answered readily as she accepted it. "What are their call signs?"

"Razor and T-Bone," Callie answered ruefully.

Carmelita blinked in shock. "No way..." she murmured softly. Turning, she pressed the button. "Come in, SWAT Kats," she spoke calmly. "Do you read?"

Almost instantly, a gruff voice answered. "Who is this?" the voice demanded. "How did you get this channel?"

Carmelita grinned widely. She knew that voice. "You don't recognize my voice, T-Bone?" she asked playfully as she leaned against the desk. "I'm hurt. And after all the fun times we had together..."

"Look lady," T-Bone interrupted. "You either answer my questions or-"

"And you really resurrected those code names?" Carmelita continued teasingly. "The last time I called you T-Bone, we were breaking into Professor Hackle's lab grounds to play Kat Kommandos with the junked experiments he had set up."

The other end was silent for a time. "...holy shit, VIX?" T-Bone gasped in amazement. "I haven't heard from you since you got tapped for-"

"And I thought you were good at keeping secret identities," Carmelita interrupted. "No wait, that was Razor."

"Did you say Vix?" another voice called out through the comm. "Is she back in town?"

"Well hello to you too, Razor," Carmelita purred happily. "Look, I'd love to chat and reminisce with you both all day, but that's something best done in person...not to mention I'm on a bit of a tight schedule. Long story short, I need your help."

"Interpol wants to recruit us?" T-Bone asked in shock.

"Not Interpol," Carmelita corrected. "Family business."

"...last I checked, your entire family was cops," Razor pointed out dryly.

"Other side of the family, if you catch my drift."

After a few beats of silence, a concerted, "YOU'RE MARRIED?!" echoed from the communicator.

Carmelita chuckled. "Not yet, but it's my fiance's family business I need your help with...before our daughter gets it into her head to try and do things her way. I'm fine with a few ripples, but I don't think the Old West needs an army of golems on the march. Heck, I don't think Prague needed it."

Callie's eyes nearly popped out of her skull. She knew that story...

"So you need some hot shot pilots who aren't afraid of a few quantum butterflies?" Razor deduced.

"We're your guys, Vix!" T-Bone declared firmly. "Just tell us where to meet you, and how you're planning on taking us with you."

"How's the country out behind Hackle's lab work for you two?" she asked curiously.

"We'll be there!" Razor responded eagerly.

Carmelita smiled as she handed the communicator back to Callie. "Thanks. I'll try to have them back before too long."

"As long as the world's still here and recognizable by the time they get back, I'm sure they can pick up whatever pieces need it," Callie concluded. "Good luck."

Sly and the others were shocked as they saw the Turbokat jet descend right in front of the van. They'd known Carmelita was bringing in impressive backup, but this was certainly a shocker. What was even more of one was when she rushed up to hug/tackle the two pilots as they leapt out of the cockpit, the embrace quickly becoming a wrestling match. When it ended - without a clear victor - all three were laughing. "Looks like you two kept in shape," she observed playfully.

"We had to," T-Bone pointed out. "Not all of us were cherry-picked to be part of Interpol's elite straight out of the Academy due to straight A's."

"It's called studying, T-Bone," Carmelita taunted. "You should try it some time." Razor let out a good natured laugh.

"Introductions, Carmelita?" Sly asked curiously.

Carmelita grinned. "Sly, Murray, Bentley, Coco, this is T-Bone and Razor...or at least, that's what they go by now. I knew them by that back when I was seven."

"The three of us were always getting up to trouble," Razor pointed out expansively. He then blinked. "Wait...Sly as in Sly Cooper?"

"In the flesh," Sly chuckled happily.

"Does that mean they're my Uncles too, Mom?" Coco asked eagerly.

T-Bone promptly scooped Coco up and onto his shoulder. "Absolutely! Say, did your Mom ever tell you about the time she swiped her Dad's badge?"

"She did what?" Sly and Coco asked in shock.

"T-Bone, you don't really-" Carmelita began.

"And then we all stood on each other's shoulder under a trenchcoat and pretended to be a single police officer!" T-Bone continued. "We pulled the Mayor over and made him get out of the car, then took it for a joyride!"

Carmelita groaned and buried her face in her hands. "Maybe I shouldn't have brought you two in..." she grumbled morosely.

"You act like that's the worst story we could tell," Razor pointed out with a laugh. Sly's grin only widened.

Time Out: The Old West

With my new Uncles in tow, I was certain we could handle anything. Sadly, Mom managed to convince everyone that fixing the timeline was higher priority than hearing more embarrassing stories of her rambunctious youth...if only just barely. Uncle Bentley and Uncle Razor started going into all sorts of technical discussion of how they could rewire the time machine to take both the van and the Turbokat...only for Uncle T-Bone to render the entire thing moot by lowering the Turbokat's crane to pick up the van. Direct contact meant the time field would extend to cover both vehicles, especially with the Turbokat providing the necessary velocity.

"As if one brainiac over-thinking things wasn't bad enough," T-Bone had joked, only to get punched on the arm by Razor. I like these guys!

With the sheriff star, we made our way back to the 1880's, in the pioneering days of the Old West. We were specifically looking in on what was happening to Tennessee Kid Cooper, who had made his name by pulling off some of the most infamous heists. On arrival, however, we discovered that Tennessee Kid Cooper...was in jail. Some new sherrif - an armadillo named Toothpick - had managed to arrest him somehow, and had celebrated by posting posters of himself all over town.

We knew we were going to have to bust Tennessee out of prison. However, we had...differing ideas on how to best do so...

"Are you crazy?" Carmelita screamed at T-Bone.

"Commander Feral sure seems to think so," Razor joked playfully.

"After hearing your partner's suggestion, I'm beginning to think he's on the right track!" Carmelita snapped back.

"What's so crazy about it?" T-Bone asked defensively. "A couple stinger missiles in the right place would blow that prison wide open. That ought to make fiishing Tennessee Kid out rather easy. Just swoop in, snatch him, and get out before anyone even has a chance to react."

As Carmelita started to yell again, Sly put his hand on her shoulder. "Why don't you let me talk to them?" Sly offered gently. "I speak the same language."

"Insanity?" Carmelita snapped irritably.

"Testosterone," Sly corrected playfully. "They're closely related, though." That managed to get everyone laughing, and quickly defused the tension the discussion had built up. "T-Bone, I'll be the first to admit your plan has...a certain visceral appeal, but it has a few flaws."

"Really?" T-Bone asked in surprise. "Seems pretty straightforward to me."

"Alright," Sly allowed. "Where do you fire the stinger missiles?"

"Like I said, in the right place," T-Bone repeated.

"And what's the right place?" Sly pressed. "Presumably somewhere that Tennessee Kid won't get hurt by the explosion, right?"

"Well of course!" T-Bone agreed. "It'd defeat the purpose otherwise."

"And just where is Tennessee Kid in the prison at any given time, so we can be sure you aren't shooting him?" Sly asked pleasantly.

T-Bone opened his mouth to reply, but no sound came out. He then slumped in on himself. "Okay, so there may be a couple technical issues with my plan."

"Like the possibility of killing a key Cooper ancestor before he has kids?" Bentley pointed out dryly.

"So we find out where he is in the prison first," T-Bone concluded. "Then we use a couple stinger missiles to blast him out. A quick overfly of the prison-"

"We're facing tech-using time travelers," Razor pointed out. "Do we really want to tip our hand of what resources we have available before we have to?"

T-Bone crossed his arms and grumbled irritably under his breath.

"So how do we find out where T.K. Cooper is, then?" Carmelita asked curiously. "Get someone on the inside? It could take weeks to get someone hired as a warden-"

"Or hours to get someone arrested," Sly suggested impishly. "Though I'm not sure how I feel about someone other than you slapping cuffs on me."

Everyone turned to stare at Sly in shock. "So the big plan is to have two of you to rescue?" T-Bone asked in surprise. "And Vix called me crazy."

"It's actually a valid plan," Bentley pointed out. "According to information, they're already rigging a noose for Tennessee Kid Cooper. We need to do something to delay that immediately...and Sly getting arrested is the quickest way to deal with this."

"And why can't we just fly the Turbokat in from above, locate him that way, and blast our way out?" T-Bone demanded.

"Because we don't have time to find out if they've installed steampunk anti-air turrets," Razor countered flatly. "You're not taking the Turbokat into a place like that blind."

Uncle T-Bone grumbled irritably about the plan for a bit - as did I, I didn't like the idea of Dad in jail again after last time - but we eventually accepted the plan. Dad didn't wait for that, not that he could with how close time was snapping at our heels. All we knew for sure was that Tennessee was in the Maximum Security Wing of the prison...but we had no idea which part of the prison that was. So Dad had to go out and make enough mischief on his own - and be seen doing it - so that he'd be named an 'Outlaw' before getting arrested.

The tasks Uncle Bentley deduced to get Dad declared an Outlaw were specifically chosen to piss off Sheriff Toothpick, although they were...somewhat questionable overall. Defacing posters? Stealing candy? Crashing a party? ...then again, I suppose that just made Dad more a political prisoner than a criminal one.

Once Dad was locked up, I went out to scout the area. Once you've seen one Old West town, you've seen them all - seriously, it was indistinguishable from a convincing movie set, except for being dirtier - so it wasn't very memorable. I did have an easy time blending in, though. I just left my outfit back in the hideout and hid my camera in my mane, and I was mistaken at every glance for a wild animal once I'd rolled in the dust a bit. The look on Uncle Razor's face when I pulled it out was priceless.

I managed to get a good picture of the prison tower, a munitions dump, and a hole in the back wall we could take advantage of. All that was left was some signal from Dad in the jail that he'd found Tennessee Kid, and letting him know a way out.

Time Out: Jail House Rock

Of course, Dad wasn't just sitting around twiddling his thumbs while we were working on the outside. He was busy inside the jail, finding Tennessee Kid and finding a way out.

Sly walked along in the black and white striped jailbird suit he'd been forced into, the massive stone ball chained to his ankle carried in his arms for easy walking. He was led through the jail to a cell in a tower before being shoved in. He quickly discovered he wasn't alone in the large cell, and the desert sand colored raccoon in the cell with him could only be one being, even without the almost trademark cowboy hat and yellow scarf he was known to always wear. "Um...howdy," Sly greeted nervously. He wanted to make a good impression.

T.K. smirked up at him from where he sat, feet up on a large barrel. "Howdy yerself," he greeted warmly. "Looks like you must have ticked ol' Toothpick off pretty good. I like that. You got a name?"

Sly decided subtlety wouldn't be the best approach here. Dropping the ball, he decided to be blunt. "The name's Sly. Sly Cooper."

T.K.'s eyes narrowed angrily as he leapt to his feet. "Now son, you should know I don't take kindly to-"

Sly slipped his cane out of his sleeve, spinning it to put the hook at T.K.'s neck. "Are we really going to waste time debating tense here? I got myself thrown in here to bust you out, not to be lectured. I've got two little ladies waiting for us to get out of here, and it's not my Missus' patience we need to worry about growing short."

T.K. grinned eagerly. "So I gots me some relatives ah ain't never heard of? No real surprise. Show me what your branch has got to offer with busting us out-"

Slipping the cane back into his sleeve, Sly heaved the ball at the wall, shattering the stone around the window to create an opening to leap out. "See you at the bottom!" he said as he leapt onto the ball before running backwards on it to roll it out the hole.

T.K. watched as Sly dropped like a rock to the ground, leaping off just before impact before landing back on the ball to keep rolling it. He shook his head wonderingly. "Well, he certainly ain't short o' cajones, that's fer sure." He then raced down the stairs just in time for Sly to blast the main door of the cell open with the ball. "Looks like break time's over! Let's get outta here!"

"We just need to make enough racket that my friends know where not to shoot," Sly stated firmly as he led the way forward, breaking down doors as he went.

"Uh...don't ya mean, know where to shoot?" T.K. asked curiously.

"Sly!" Bentley suddenly yelled in Sly's ear. "T-Bone got impatient! Watch out!"

"Get down!" Sly shouted, tugging T.K. to the ground just before the Turbokat shot overhead, a large sphere dropping from it as it passed, falling in a parabolic arc before hitting the wall of the prison and blasting a huge hole in it, providing an instant getaway for the pair. "...and no, I did not."

"What in all the nine hells kinda plane was that?" T.K. demanded in stupefied amazement, the cigar he'd held in his teeth dropping unnoticed to the ground. "It...it flew by like lightning and dropped thunder! Even the family flying machines can't pull that off!"

"Yet," Sly corrected as he tugged T.K. towards the gap. "I'll fill you in completely once we get back to the hideout, and you get into something other than jail duds."

"Yet?" T.K. asked intently. "Ya mean that crazy theory o' mine about all the crazy doodads Toothpick's got at his disposal being from the future was true? And I thought I'd just finally flipped."

"Can't say one way or the other about your mental state," Sly allowed. "You are a Cooper, after all-"

"Ha!" T.K. barked out. "And so are you, that's fer sure."

"-but yes, the tech is from the future...and so am I."

"How many generations?" T.K. asked curiously.

"Can't say for sure," Sly admitted. "My memory's not the best since my bout with amnesia, and the first sign we had someone was messing with time was pages vanishing from the Thievius Raccoonus."

"How'd you get amnesia?" T.K. inquired in concern.

"I can't remember."

Tennessee burst into laughter as Sly leapt out the side of the jail, towing his ancestor along with him as he pulled out his paraglider to glide away to safety.

It didn't take long for Dad to get back to the hideout with Tennessee in tow. Of course, that first impression...could have gone better.

Tennessee glanced around the hideout, his eyes going from Coco to Bentley to Murray to the SWAT Kats. "So...this yer team?" he asked Sly carefully.

"My family," Sly corrected.

"...ya sure this ain't some crazy death-based hallucination cause they already hanged me? Cause this is the craziest group ah ever seen assembled."

"Seems this ancestor is a bit cruder than the other one," Carmelita mused dryly as she dropped in from the roof.

Tennessee looked her up and down appreciatively. "Well, now ah know ah'm dead, cause ain't no other way I'd be seeing an angel." He took Carmelita's hand and kissed it, leaving a desert rose he'd pulled out of nowhere in her grip as he pulled back.

Carmelita chuckled softly. "Are all Coopers such charmers, Sly?" she asked curiously.

"Only with the exceptionally pretty ladies," Tennessee joked, tipping his hat rakishly.

Sly gripped his cane tightly in both hands. "That's my fiance you're flirting with," he growled out possessively.

"So yer sayin' ya ain't wed yet and ah still got a chance wit her?" Tennessee asked eagerly.

Coco instantly tugged back on Sly's tail. "No Dad! You can't kill him now! He hasn't done the heist he's famous for or had kids yet! We're trying to stop Le Paradox, not create one!"

Tennessee chuckled. "Nice wordplay there, little lady. Now why don't one of ya fill me in on that full story I was promised?"

Time Out: Family Trends

It took a while to give Tennessee the full story he wanted. After all, it was a long story. It took even longer to get him to accept the story, since it was just so far beyond anything he could believe. Eventually, we were able to get him to accept that we were there to help him because we were family, and he ignored the rest of it. By that time, Uncle Bentley and Felicia had identified Toothpick. As we'd expected, he was from our time and likely working for Le Paradox.

Tennessee had quite the story to tell when we got to how he ended up in jail. I get the feeling he told more than he would have normally because Mom was there...

"So yeah, I was gettin' ready ta do that big bank job, steal all the gold, leave no evidence...only for that Toothpick fella to catch me before ah could start, sayin' he was sheriff!" Tennessee snapped angrily. "Well, ah knew somethin' was up with him e'en before the gold went missin'. After all, there's already a sheriff for these parts, and ah made sure ta time the robbery fer a time she'd be outta town. And-"

"She?" Carmelita asked in surprise. "Isn't it rather odd for a female to have such a high law enforcement position in this era?"

Tennessee laughed. "Ya ain't kiddin' there, but ya ain't never seen nobody like Sheriff Valina. She's a right spitfire, kick the ass o' any man three times on Sunday. Can out shoot any man jack around these parts, too. She's been huntin' me for a while, what with all mah capers...but she's a right stickler for proof before arrest. It ain't enough her gut tells her I done all these crimes. If she can't pin it to me in a court o' law, she ain't gonna jail me. Sides, she knows I keep the worse types at bay." An odd smile crossed his face. "The voices...they don't bug me when she's talkin'..."

Sly frowned thoughtfully. It had been part of the Thievius Racconus that Tennessee had 'heard voices' telling him to blow things up, among other things. It wasn't something he liked thinking about. Still, if this Valina made the voices stop...that might explain how Tennessee finally managed to have children...

"How'd she learn to fight so well?" Coco asked curiously.

"Well, she's a hy-breed," Tennessee explained. "They ain't too common round these parts, and folks generally don't like 'em. Some nonsense about 'the purity o' bloodlines'. Ah ain't never had truck wit' that. Sides, them stripes make her look mighty pretty, far as ah'm concerned."

"Stripes?" T-Bone asked curiously. "She part tiger or something?"

"Nah, no tiger in her," Tennessee countered. "Here, lemme show ya..." He started fishing around his person. "Now where'd ah hide it...ah!" Reaching into his tail, he fished around for a time before pulling out a rolled parchment. He carefully unrolled it. "Drew that meself!" he declared proudly.

The image displayed a woman who could almost pass for Carmelita's sister, at least as far as figure and expression were concerned. She had fiery red hair, blazing emerald eyes, and pale golden fur that blended almost exactly with the sand of the desert around them. By the shape of the tail and face, one would think she was a fox...but her tail had darker stripes along it at regular intervals, along with similar marking along her arms, legs, and a raccoon mask marking around her eyes. She was a fox/raccoon hybrid.

Of course, not everyone was able to take in these details, as the full body portrait showed she was naked except for a rough towel clutched in one hand and a loaded pistol brandished in the other. "Uh...?" Sly offered nervously.

"Explain," Carmelita ordered flatly.

"Caught wind o' some thugs plannin' ta ambush her when she weren't ready for 'em," Tennessee explained easily. "There were other things they were plannin' ta do ta her...but ah ain't gonna say them in mixed company." Looking around, he saw he didn't need to explain further. "Well, that weren't nothing ah was gonna tolerate, so ah went in ta stop 'em. Unfortunately, she heard the ruckus and came chargin' out gun blazin'...wit no concern 'bout her state o' dress, or lack there of." He scratched under his nose, blushing brightly. "Ah...added the towel when ah painted this one."

"This one?" Murray asked curiously.

"Gave her the other one," Tennessee explained. "Only saw her for a second before ah ran, but ah wanted ta explain why I was there. She heard me out, accepted mah explanation, and...well, ah gave her the painting."

Razor chuckled softly. "How'd she take that?" he asked impishly.

"Seemed rather flustered at first...then she asked me ta meet her fer drinks later," Tennessee explained. "Over drinks, she told me she was impressed ah got her so accurate with only a second's glance. Said it showed just how focused on her ah was, how good my mind is fer details." He shrugged lamely. "Ah don't remember much else that night. She can also out drink any man around these parts." He sighed longingly. "What a woman...this job was gonna be mah last job, one that made me infamous because it couldn't be proven it was me...and ah was gonna retire from thievin' and be her deputy, help her find out 'who was responsible' and just stay with her till mah sun sets." He sighed again, this one sadly. "No chance o' that happenin' now..."

"Unless we take down Toothpick with proof he took the gold," Coco pointed out. "That would give you an in to become Valina's deputy, since you're working law enforcement."

"And if the gold isn't discovered, you can help her to track down where he hid it..." Bentley added impishly.

A slow grin spread across Tennessee's face. "Well truss me up fer Thanksgivin' like a right turkey, that just might work! And it'd protect her rep as th' best sheriff if we prove Toothpick's corrupt!" He leapt to his feet. "Well, what are ya layin' around for? Let's get to work...startin' with gettin' mah gun back!"

Bentley grinned widely. "And I think I've found just where Toothpick's hiding it..."

Time Out: Guns Blazing

The first task as far as taking Toothpick down was getting Tennessee his gun back. While Uncle T-Bone had wanted to just go in with his guns, Razor reminded him that the goal was repairing history, which meant Tennessee needed to be responsible for taking Toothpick down and revealing his treachery, to get him in good graces with Sheriff Valina for when he 'retired'...once he got the gold from the big heist.

Thankfully, this did include a job for Uncle Razor and Uncle T-Bone. The two of them were going to use their formidable skills to trail Toothpick to the abandoned mine the future felon had converted into his personal warehouse, blow the door, and retrieve the gun...with Tennessee joining them to actually identify it. With their strength, agility, and stealth skills, they were ideal for the job.

Besides, it kept Uncle T-Bone from getting restless.

T-Bone and Razor leapt easily from rooftop to rooftop, clifftop to clifftop, and back and forth between the two as they tailed Toothpick from a distance. Their visors - built for flying in the Turbokat - were designed with a built in zoom viewer, so they didn't need to pull out an extra device to track Toothpick from a distance. Razor kept his eyes on the target, while T-Bone used his greater physical strength to silence any thugs they came across before they could alert Toothpick.

It took barely any time at all to trail Toothpick to the huge metal door sealing the mine, as well as see him input some sort of combination to the control panel nearby to cause the much smaller door in one corner to swing open. Afterwards, he ducked into the mine, declaring he was going to take a look at his gold. Razor and T-Bone leapt down to the control panel.

"Watch my back," Razor instructed as he immediately began to hack the panel.

"Don't I always?" T-Bone teased as he flexed eagerly, punching out the first giant scorpion that approached from behind before it could ready its stinger.

While T-Bone dealt with the scorpions, Razor addressed the console. Rather than going at it by attacking the code, he focused on forensically analyzing the panel and what they knew of Toothpick in order to figure out what the password could be to open the gate, while checking the code to see if there were any security systems that would activate if anyone used the code while Toothpick was in the mine. Discovering there was no such security, he readily punched in the deduced code, G-O-L-D-B-O-O-T-Y.

"Ah got it from here, fellas!" Tennessee called out as he ducked in through the door just before it swung shut.

"So much for us going in together," T-Bone growled angrily.

Razor shrugged. "Let him get his gun alone," he offered easily. "He'll be fine."

And he was fine. The gun he was so worried about turned out to be his model of the Cooper Cane, with the gun part in the shaft and the trigger in the hook. When he got back, he was singing the praises of 'Ol' Blue' to anyone who would listen. Surprisingly, this led to an unexpected question.

"So how come ya ain't got a gun in yer cane?" Tennessee asked Sly curiously. "Ah mean, ranged combat's gotta be safer than up close, and certainly neater."

"As time went on, the two major precepts of Cooper Thieves when dealing with targets became Non-Lethal and Without a Trace," Sly explained easily. "Unfortunately, as technology advanced, that became harder and harder to do effectively at range." He gestured to Coco. "My daughter's preference for thrown needles dipped in various substances that disperse in the blood stream is the first successful application of ranged combat in the Cooper Legacy since...you."

"Much obliged ya brought it back, lil' lady," Tennessee offered happily, tilted his hat at a rakish angle. Coco blushed in pleasure.

The next part of the job involved Dad and Uncle Bentley arranging to listen in on Toothpick's plans in his office...where we learned both his plan and the fact he can apparently expand to immense size. That would make combat...interesting.

Bentley left the RC car in place to keep listening while he continued our work. With what we learned, we were able to make a plan to get Tennessee on the train so he could get the gold back and deal with Toothpick once and for all. The only problem was the train was too fast to catch easily, so we'd need to divert it so it would be more predictable.

Somehow, this meant entering various contests in disguise so we could swipe the keys. Is it just me, or do these jobs get really ridiculous sometimes?

Uncle Murray was in the bare-knuckle boxing tournament. Dad was in the foot race. Mom entered the shooting challenge, since it required using a gun. Stupid hooves...

Of course they all won, and we got the keys we needed. With the train rerouted, we moved in to start taking it down. Murray drove the van behind the train, easily keeping up to pick each of us up where we needed. T-Bone and Razor dropped each of us off at the right points from the Turbokat, making a straight-forward job of taking control of the train from him.

My job was a bit more complicated...mostly because it wasn't officially part of the job. See, the way Tennessee kept talking about that Valina got me thinking. We needed to deal with Toothpick, true enough...but we were also repairing history. That meant Valina needed to stay sheriff of the area so she would partner up with Tennessee once he 'went straight'. And with how easily Toothpick stepped in, it seemed her position wasn't as secure as it should be. If Tennessee were credited with taking Toothpick down in this time, she just might lose the reputation that let her keep the job.

But that was going to be difficult. First I would need to find her, and hope she was close enough to intervene at the right time...

Time Out: History Repeats

Luckily enough, Valina was a lot closer than I thought. It seemed she was already on the way back into town from wherever she'd gone. That actually made things easier and more complicated all at once. Getting her close enough to let her take down Toothpick in time would be easy enough. The hard part would be delaying her long enough that Dad and the others could successfully remove the gold so Tennessee's historic heist was still recorded properly while leaving the evidence to finger Toothpick, but not so long she got there after the fight was over. I was pretty sure that was going to be difficult...

Valina lightly jogged along the clifftop back towards her jurisdiction, easily clearing wide leaps from one promontory to another. She was dressed in a sand colored jacket, a dark blue blouse tied in a knot under her bust line, faded blue jeans, a ten gallon hat, and thick riding boots shaped from years of wear to match her feet and calves. Her twin revolvers were strapped to her hips, along with two derringers in her boot heels, a pistol strapped to the inside of her hat, a bayonet in her jacket along her spine, and seven bolas concealed in the stripes of her tail. She couldn't help but feel naked with so few of her weapons at hand.

Still, she had been told to take it easy, and she would listen...to a certain extent. At least, she'd listen after she tracked Kid down and learned what kind of man he really was...and beat the tar out of him three different ways if he was the wrong kind. Thus why she was moving at a slow jog rather than a dead run like she preferred to. It would be time enough when she finally tracked him down.

"Hi."

Valina blinked as she slowed down. It wasn't every day she was caught off guard...but a talking pony sitting on a metal crab did it. "Ah didn'a think that mushroom looked odd," she murmured worriedly, thinking back to a quick meal she'd made herself. She knew the plantlife around here pretty well, and was sure she knew the ones that were safe to eat. "Or did ah drink from th' wrong kinda cactus? Please say it's the cactus, 'tain't harmful in th' long run..."

The filly giggled. "I'm not a hallucination, I promise," she spoke up readily.

"Forgive me if'n ah don't take th' possible hallucination's word 'bout its reality at face value," Valina responded curtly, resting her hands on her hips.

"Kid showed me the portrait," the filly offered playfully. "You can think of me as the family matchmaker." She giggled softly. "Everyone else does."

Valina raised an eyebrow. "So...friend o' th' family, or actual family?"

"Actual," the filly offered, lifting a cane with a distinctive hook.

Valina instantly recognized the shape from Kid's gun. She glanced again at the metal crab as two circles that were definitely eyes of some sort swiveled towards her. "...so what do ah need ta pretend not ta see ta preserve the timeline?" she demanded curtly.

The filly blinked in surprise. "How did you know I was from the future?" she gasped out in shock.

"A few thangs," Valina allowed. "Ya ain't lookin' at me wit' disdain or anythang like that, but ya ain't got an Eastern accent. 'Round here, that means ya must be from a more enlightened time about mixed breeds...so either ancient past or different future. Trains move on their own, but they ain't got eyes yet, or are that small." She shrugged her shoulders. "But mostly it's th' only explanation fer why Kid wouldn't tell me about some 'family matchmaker' afore she showed up that didn' end in me kickin' his nuts out his nostrils, bein' he didn't know ya existed yet."

The filly giggled wickedly. "Wow, Cooper males really do have a type," she murmured in wonder. She held out her hoof. "Coco Cooper, start of the third millennium."

Valina accepted the offered shake. "Valina Strype," she greeted warmly. "Yer from th' future, ya know what year it is now better'n me."

"Strype?" Coco asked curiously.

Valina shrugged. "When ya grow up at a church orphanage, ya get whatever last name the Mother thinks suits ya. Ah liked Strype better'n Stripe-dog. Ah ain't got no badger in me." She glanced towards her jurisdiction. "So...what do ah need ta not see?"

"Any gold we miss," Coco responded readily. "Tennessee is legendary for his gold heist, but an armadillo from our time caught him off guard and took the gold for himself, painting himself the new sheriff and locking Tennessee up for catching him at the scene before he could do anything. We're taking Toothpick down and taking the gold to wherever Tennessee was going to stash it...but you need to be the one to take down Toothpick if you're to keep your rep, right? That's something the others forgot about."

"Pretty sure breakin' th' timeline is a worse crime than grand theft," Valina decided firmly. "Just show me th' way."

"Why'd you leave town, anyway?" Coco asked as the metal crab she rode turned and raced away, leading Valina on a fast paced chase. "I know he planned the heist specifically for when you were out of town to make his legend while being able to retire without you having to arrest him, but why'd you leave?"

"Had ta see someone who knew what they were doin' and did'na judge hybrids," Valina responded readily. "Know one lady, but she's way outta mah way and don't like towns and cities."

Coco tilted her head thoughtfully...and then her eyes widened in shock. "Missed your time of the month?" she asked curiously.

"None o' yer business!" Valina snapped out angrily.

"Is it Tennessee's business?" Coco pressed impishly.

"Ye ain't born yet in th' now!" Valina growled. "Won't break the timeline now if'n ah shoot ya!"

"Assuming you can hit me!" Coco taunted playfully as she spun her cane.

That proved easier than I thought. And when we actually got to the train...

"My gun!" Tennessee Kid called out in despair as a group of Le Paradox's goons made off with Ol' Blue.

Toothpick cackled wickedly as he watched the Cooper's despair. "You should have known you couldn't best me-HURK!"

In the midst of his taunt, Valina leapt down from the clifftop onto the moving train, bleeding the momentum of her fall in a drop kick into Toothpick's shell, trusting the armor to keep the blow from being lethal. Flipping back off him, she delivered a spinning kick with her other leg to his chin, an elbow into his gut, and a thrusting palm strike to his solar plexus to send him skidding and tumbling back against the front of the train car. "Can't ah take mah eyes off ya fer ten minutes without ya gettin' in trouble, Kid?" she groaned as she slowly stood upright, catching her jacket as the weight of the bayonet and the strength of the wind caused it to fall right into her hands from where she took it off higher up.

"Valina?" Kid gasped in surprise. "What're ya doin' here?"

"'Cordin' ta yer 'family matchmaker', fixin' history," Valina joked as she sauntered towards him.

Kid's eyes widened as he saw Toothpick expanding to a huge size behind Valina, his guns drawn. "Valina! Behind-"

Almost before Valina finished turning around, six shots rang out from her revolvers. Two pierced Toothpick's expanded kneecaps. Two sent his guns flying. The last two pierced his long ears, the shockwave from their passage causing him to scream as he collapsed, clutching at them as he shrank back to normal size. "So what's th' protocol fer arrestin' a Time Criminal?" she asked curiously. "Ah assume there is one?"

"Not yet," Carmelita spoke up as she and Sly leapt onto the scene. "But Interpol will probably have something hashed out once I file the report on this case...assuming they believe me."

Valina glanced from Carmelita to Sly. "...so yer what she meant about Cooper guys havin' a type?" she asked rakishly.

"Am ah in trouble?" Kid asked worriedly.

"Depends how many years ya planned ta 'help me' search uselessly fer 'the real gold thief'," Valina drawled wickedly.

"Th' rest of our lives?" Kid offered hopefully.

Valina smiled warmly. "Good answer, Kid," she purred before grabbing him by the front of his shirt and pulling him into a deep kiss.

"Woof," Murray murmured in amazement from the van. "And I thought Sly and Carmelita lacked inhibitions after China!"

"To be fair, their clothes are still on," Bentley pointed out. "...okay, spoke too soon..."

We gave Valina and Kid some privacy, letting the train keep running while we dealt with Toothpick. We had a momentary issue with the van's breaks - especially since van and train were heading for a broken bridge - but timely intervention by the Turbokat fixed both issues.

...okay, while zooming down to grab the van and take it into the air made perfect sense, why in the world did they bring a 'bridge missile' with them? Why the heck did they even have a missile designed to rapidly repair a broken bridge? What sort of absurd situations do they deal with in Megakat City to even make them think to create such 'weaponry'?

Still, we dealt with Toothpick by dropping him off with Uncle Scrooge to house until we could deal with him more permanently. Since the van's engines - and the time drive - were still going nuts, we sought out the next time shift item as fast as possible...which turned out to be the necklace Uncle Murray had worn since his time with Guru. Apparently, the bone on it dated back to a prehistoric era that was being altered.

...this was going to be interesting...

Time Out: Yabba

It didn't take long to get our saber-toothed ancestor - who I nicknamed 'Bob' - back to the hideout. It took even less time for him to become enamored with the magitek communications device...and he was able to get it working to boot! I guess prehistoric beings had stronger magic instincts. Guess that's how he knew it was a show.

Unfortunately, it would still take a while to reconnect at the other end, but it did result in a translation spell that let us understand Bob's grunting language more clearly...even if his actual name still didn't translate properly. He then told us his story...which was much what we could expect. Grizz shows up, steals all the eggs before Bob can steal them, removing his role in the local history and rendering him obsolete. Bob had gotten depressed and out of shape from this, which is how he got caught...and how he lost his special thief tool, the first Cooper Cane.

Given how dangerous things were out and about - especially in regards to retrieving the missing components of the van and time machine - we needed Bob back in climbing shape. Thankfully, T-Bone and Razor claimed they had the perfect way to snap him back into shape...

T-Bone slammed his fist into his palm as he stared out at the course he and Razor had laid out. Rock rings in place of tires, wooden poles, wandering penguins as random hazards, pterodactyl bait so they'd have to dodge them as well, varied terrain complete with rope swings and wall climbs...the classic military obstacle course recreated in the prehistoric medium. "Ready, Bob?" he asked eagerly.

"" Bob replied, his grunts translating as the pair heard them.

"It's an obstacle course," Razor explained readily. "You need to get through it to get back into shape.

"" Bob asked curiously.

"Not quite," T-Bone pointed out. "See, we've noticed you have a tendency to stuff your face with whatever's available...so we've made sure there's nothing here that's edible."

"Nothing except this!" Razor pointed out, holding up a steaming batch of delicious dumplings. "So you have two choices. Chase me down on the obstacle course to get the dumplings from me..."

"Or try and fight your way past me back to the rest of the region," T-Bone growled eagerly, gesturing to the dead-end cul-de-sac at the edge of the cliff they'd built the course in. "Personally, I'm hoping you pick the second one."

Bob stared at T-Bone's eager grin, flexing muscles, and extended claws and stepped back. ""

"Then come and get them!" Razor declared as he took off down the course, easily clearing every obstacle as it approached. Bob quickly took off in pursuit.

T-Bone watched as Bob attempted to run the course. While he was definitely out of shape for him, the scale on which Prehistoric creatures were built was so much larger than modern that he was still in better shape than the average citizen of Megakat City. Razor had to put forth major effort to keep ahead of Bob, though there were - as planned - several points where he was able to pause just out of reach and tease him with the dumplings, forcing him to push himself harder. Both of them were ready for the point where Bob simply collapsed, unable to push himself further at this point...but it never came. Instead, Bob just got faster and faster, having an easier time keeping up with Razor.

Eventually, Bob was able to catch up to Razor and swipe the dumplings. That's when T-Bone made his move. As Bob lifted the dish to dump them into his mouth, T-Bone leapt to land on the saber-toothed coon's head, leaping away with the dumplings in hand. "" Bob called out angrily. ""

"Still gotta keep 'em!" T-Bone taunted as he raced ahead.

Bob let out an angry bellow and charged after him. T-Bone led him on a back and forth path through the obstacle course, tossing the dish to Razor any time Bob got too close. Bob would then turn to chase Razor, only to have to dodge or block T-Bone's attacks. When T-Bone had the dish, Razor would attack unless Bob got too close.

Eventually, Bob had enough. When T-Bone tossed the dish again, Bob charged T-Bone. The buff cat tried to drive him back with an attack, but Bob let the blow hit him before delivering a devastating blow to T-Bone's chest, sending him flying into the nearest ice wall.

"T-Bone!" Razor called out in shock, only to gasp as Bob closed the distance too fast to track and wrapped his tail around the smaller cat's neck, slamming him into the ground as he caught the dish. He then pinned Razor to the ground with one foot as he prepared to eat, only to hesitate as T-Bone got out of the ice wall.

T-Bone grinned as he crossed his arms, grinning from ear to ear. "Go ahead and eat," he offered. "You've earned it."

Bob grinned as he lifted the dish to eat...only to hesitate. As delicious as the dumplings tasted...victory tasted far sweeter. Shrugging, he tossed the dumplings to a shocked T-Bone. ""

And just like that, Bob was back in shape. If anything, he was in even better shape than before, able to scale an ice wall in seconds with just his claws! And I thought I was fast using my cane split in four to climb.

And if we thought his climbing was impressive, watching him use a springy tree to launch himself to the ice wall like a slingshot was...well, it was something. He retrieved the Temporal Sprocket in a matter of minutes, once we told him what to look for. He was a primal beast!

...for some reason, Mom seemed to like that. She seemed to like Dad's reaction to her liking that even more. I made a point of asking all my Uncles - one at a time - what Dad meant by "showing her his primal beast". Their reactions were priceless! I have to admit, as frustrating as it is to always be seen as adorable by everyone around me, it does have its perks.

Time Out: Dabba Don't

While Bob retrieved the Temporal Sprocket, Uncle Murray had to retrieve the pieces of the Gravity Encabulator - another lost piece of the time machine - back from a group of penguins. After that, Uncle Bentley was going to go tag Grizz with a tracer dart...but when he was assembling the Encabulator, there was a short and for a brief time he...he wasn't. None of us had any idea what that meant, but we knew we couldn't risk him on any field assignments until we did. It felt too much like what had been happening in the other time periods when briefly it would be someone else in Uncle Bentley's place...someone I can't even remember right now.

As such, I went into the ice caves to tag Grizz, with Deik-Beck as back up for computers. I was better suited anyway, what with being able to regulate my temperature on my own accord. I just hope whatever's going on with Uncle Bentley gets resolved soon...

The ice caverns proved to be a series of large chambers connected via narrow tunnels blocked off by artificial rockfalls and ice walls. The thermal visor Bentley had developed allowed Coco to track footprints, in order to follow the paths Grizz had taken to know which paths to break open with a well placed kick. In addition to the 'local' thugs at Grizz' beck and call, there were a few of Le Paradox troops in their hazmat suits and gas masks with their gas sprayers. Coco made sure to take those out before they even caught sight of her, knowing that reports of a sighting would go back to Le Paradox rapidly, and could cause problems for them all. She was quite distinct, after all.

It didn't take long for Coco to find Grizz painting a massive mural on the wall of the cavern. "Oh yeah!" he was rapping eagerly. "They say I'm like DaVinci, a master with the brush! When my art is on the wall, it makes the crowd hush..."

Coco quickly managed to tag Grizz with a tracking dart...but decided to follow after him for a time anyway. The painting had switches for a door, which led her along a narrow path with large Pterodactyl eggs rolling down it like boulders. Coco was able to evade on the way up, eventually finding her way to another large chamber with mammoth guards, in time to see Grizz toss some gems to the guards before passing through another door.

"Gem keys?" Coco asked Deik-Beck thoughtfully.

"Beep!" Deik-Beck piped up in affirmation.

It didn't take long for Coco to filch the keys and open the door, following another long path in time to hear Grizz rap out his plan. "The Grizz gonna put some art on ice! Gonna dig it up later for a big fat price! Le Paradox is a stinky dude, and I'm getting real sick of his attitude!"

"So that's it," Coco murmured thoughtfully. "Planting fake cave paintings to sell in the present..." She shrugged. "Well, at least it's nothing complex." Turning, she returned to the hideout.

After that, Dad tailed Grizz to get the code to enter his Fortress, so we could take him down hard. As much as T-Bone wanted to, the Turbokat wasn't repaired enough to do a bombing run...and besides that, we still needed to try and retrieve Bob's cane.

While that didn't pan out...it turned out Mom had been doing her own reconnaissance without bothering the rest of us. Managed to get security codes and schematics too. When asked how she managed it, all she said was she 'met someone who spoke the same language'.

Carmelita smiled as she finally caught sight of the quarry she'd been looking for. After seeing the pattern with Rioichi and Tennessee, she honestly wasn't surprised to find that Bob fit the bill as well. Right where she'd expected, she spotted the saber-toothed vixen, lean and wiry...and punching holes through ice to get at edibles. Approaching her would have been problematic...except that she apparently smelled Bob on her, and not in a bad way.

No words were actually exchanged. They stared at each other for a time, and the larger vixen had eventually used one claw to draw an image of Grizz in the ice. Carmelita had responded by shooting it. The vixen had grinned widely, and proceeded to sketch out the entire schematics of Grizz' fortress in ice, scraping a layer away each time Carmelita had scanned it into her tablet. She had finished by sketching a keypad - no numbers, since the concept didn't exist yet - and pressed the buttons in order to show the code.

Carmelita had turned to leave with the information...only to be stunned as she realized the vixen's loose garb had been holding two infants - one raccoon, one fox - against her, and they had been actively nursing the entire time. She decided not to mention that to anyone.

...for some reason, that made Bob really happy.

Still, this meant we were now ready to take Grizz down hard. The plan was simple and straightforward. Charge in, smash everything, shut down the security systems, and take Grizz down hard. The only minor issue we had was Uncle Bentley being upset that he was still being sidelined, but everyone was firm on that.

Almost disappointingly, the plan went off practically without a hitch. Not only did shutting down the factory go perfectly between Uncle Razor and my work on the egg vats and Bob's breaking the pressure valves, but even the momentary hitch - when it looked like Uncle Murray and Uncle T-Bone took a wrong turn in an egg lift - worked out as it led them both right to Grizz. Grizz tried to fight by ice skating...but it turned out Uncle T-Bone's equipment included pop-out skate boots he'd been wearing in the ice and snow, letting him match Grizz on the ice while Uncle Murray took pot shots at him whenever he got too close. It was almost painful to see him trounced so bad...

"Stop hitting yourself!" T-Bone declared as he slammed Grizz' left fist into the bear's face.

"Stop hitting yourself!" Murray echoed as he repeated the action with the bear's right fist.

"Stop hitting yourself!"

"Stop hitting yourself!"

...almost. Still, it was nice seeing Uncle Murray and Uncle T-Bone bond like that.

While we were doing that, Uncle Bentley managed to fully repair Turbokat, Time Machine, Van, and Communications device. As a result, we were ready to head to our next destination...Medieval England, and Grizz's crown was the perfect ticket. Hopefully, we'd get some answers about what was going on with Uncle Bentley soon. It looked like he was starting to go stir crazy.

Time Out: We're Knights of the Round Table

We arrived safely in Medieval England, and began searching for Sir Galleth Cooper, the contemporary ancestor. He was supposed to be one of the King's most trusted knights - one of the few Coopers to use their skills under the direction of the legal authority, by breaking into enemy castles and the like to steal important artifacts and information for his King - but we found him performing in a local circus of all things! And as a jester! Between that and what looked like robotic werewolves patrolling the streets, we knew Le Paradox was behind this somehow.

As such, the first mission was getting Sir Galleth out of the circus and finding out what was going on from him. We thought that would be easy enough...until Razor came back from a quick scouting report with something very unexpected...

As soon as Razor returned from a quick scouting mission, he turned to Carmelita. "Have you ever time traveled before?" he asked quickly.

Carmelita blinked in surprise. "No. Why?"

Razor laid out a Wanted poster. "I found this pinned to a tree. Take a close look."

The poster was as expected for things like this. It showed the subject, a name, a reward, and what they were wanted for. What caught eyes immediately, however, was the fact that the vixen in the picture could have passed for Carmelita's twin, as far as they could tell in the greyscale of the poster. Same hairstyle, same build, same musculature, same expression between angry and determined...dressed in a tight fitting outfit of tunic and tights and holding a longbow.

Wanted
Robyn Hood and her Merry Menace
For Treason, Theft, Theft, Theft, Humiliation of Officers of the Law, Theft, and Impersonating a Deceased Noble
Reward: Half what's left in the local treasury when she's brought to justice!

Scrawled under it in rather fancy cursive was, "Nice try, fellows! I emptied that last week! RH."

After a time of everyone staring at the picture, Coco spoke up. "$50 says that's Sir Galleth's girlfriend."

"No bet," everyone responded immediately, setting a round of giggles.

"Well, either way, it looks like I'm sitting this mission out for a while," Carmelita allowed. "At least until we get Sir Galleth here and can get answers out of him about her. Maybe he knows where she and her 'Merry Menace' hang out."

"In that case, let's get him out," Sly concluded firmly.

Of course, getting Galleth out meant getting Dad in, and that meant a disguise. While I could make a great disguise with Bentley's help, I was running low on materials. As a result, I sent Dad and Uncle Razor out to gather a few materials. Dad came back with a report of an underground giant robot foundry - complete with lasers and modern equipment - under the cobbler's shop. Definitely something we'd need to keep in mind.

The outfit we made Dad was based off the outfit worn by 'Robyn Hood' in the picture, turning his cane into a bow he could use to launch arrow ropes to grind across. He then went alone to get Galleth out of the circus, and returned successfully.

One Galleth was back at the hideout, we got more answers than we bargained for...

As Sir Galleth entered the hideout - still in jester's cap atop his armor - he took one look at Carmelita and rushed to her side. "Maid Marian!" he declared in shock. "What brings you into this iniquitous den at the edge of town? Know you not how dangerous it is to be so close to the Black Knight? Your arrows have yet to pierce his armor, and his rain destruction unknowable! And...where did you get such unseemly attire for one of your line?" He eyed Carmelita up and down in concern. "Not that your forest garb has much more in the ways of modesty, but still!"

Carmelita blinked in shock. "You have me confused with someone else," she stated flatly. "I should be used to that by now."

Sir Galleth blinked as he heard her voice. "Verily, you are not Maid Marian...though you are so close in appearance as to pass for her twin. Pray, might you stand in for her? Her double life has become harder and harder to maintain, and it would allay much suspicion should Maid Marian and Robyn Hood be witnessed together."

"...wait, what?" T-Bone managed to voice. "Robin Hood...and Maid Marian...the same person? How did that happen?"

"Ah, a tragic tale," Sir Galleth allowed. "Sir Robin of Loxley was as noble a knight as any might imagine, and a good friend of mine. Maid Marian was ward of the King, and thus an equal to most nobles in terms of marriage prospects. She and Robin were betrothed, and while there was not love between them, they were quite fond of each other. However, Rottingham - a low born knave with high station but who could not be a knight - used the Crusades to conceal cold-blooded murder so he might claim Marian's hand. It could not be proven, but I told her of what I saw...and she fled into the Woods. She gathered the dissatisfied and the oppressed from the lands Rottingham held sway over and makes war against him and his. Originally, she used Sir Robin's name to fight for his memory...but she was unable to conceal her gender as she wished for her raids as it was..." Here Sir Galleth seemed to lose his words, making obscure, arcane hand gestures to try and find a delicate way to phrase things.

"She's got a body that's impossible to hide or mistake for a man's?" T-Bone suggested delicately.

"Oh very much so," Sir Galleth confirmed. "That's when she was given the name Robyn Hood."

"And how are you involved now?" Coco asked curiously.

Sir Galleth cleared his throat awkwardly. "That is a...delicate matter..."

"You're one of the knights who was supposed to arrest her before this 'Black Knight' showed up, but you both have strong feelings for each other but won't act on them because you feel that would be betraying Robin's memory, despite the fact that if he were here he'd probably be pushing you both together and telling you to be happy with each other and is to a certain extent happy he died as the only honorable way he could get out of his engagement to Marian to make way for you?" Razor deduced calmly.

Sir Galleth blinked in shock, then awkwardly tugged at the flesh of his arm. "Have I eaten so poorly this past fortnight, that I am so transparent?" Several of the gathered group chuckled.

"And this Black Knight we have to fight?" Sly asked. "You said arrows didn't penetrate his armor?"

"Verily!" Galleth continued. "We know not from whence he came, but he brings destruction in his wake. All who work under him are constructs of metal and fur, with minds that mimic living beings but with no soul behind them. I attempted to deal with him and his myself, but while I was a match for the troops, the Black Knight seemed to know my every move before I'd even attempted it! He even named each of the maneuvers from the family tome as I prepared to use them! Gratefully he seems incapable of performing them himself, but I fear it means he has great mental prowess, capable of plucking the thoughts from our minds!"

"Or they managed to get a long, uninterrupted look at the complete Thievius Raccoonus," Coco pointed out worriedly. "The Black Knight, whoever he is, is obviously from our time-"

"Oh, time travel!" Sir Galleth declared in relief. "That does explain everything. I shall follow your lead in writing the wrongs upon the fabric of events in this day, that I not unwittingly cast the river of time into a new course while seeking the old one."

"You seem...surprisingly accepting of this," Bentley observed thoughtfully.

"Maid Marian is truly a one of a kind beauty," Sir Galleth explained. He gestured to Carmelita. "A violation of the inherent nature of causality is the only explanation why there could be another so like her."

...we all decided to just let that one go. As long as he was cooperative...

Time Out: We Dance When E'er We're Able

Of course, the first step had to be getting Galleth's cane back. His was built into his lance, and had been taken by the Black Knight when he'd been defeated. In a stroke of luck, the Black Knight was moving from the castle to the Blacksmith's with only two guards, though we didn't know why. He did have the cane with him, though, so Dad went in to take out the two guards and give Uncle Bentley remote access to the case for a hack. This was accomplished without any problems.

However, it did alert the Black Knight to our presence, and security was tightened, with hot air balloons set up weighted down by remote observation equipment. Thankfully, they were set up in such a way to be perfect targets for Galleth to handle with his cane and special techniques...though the last one got shot down by an arrow before he could get to it, though none of us could tell where the arrow came from. Sir Galleth seemed overjoyed, as this apparently meant that 'Robyn Hood' had entered the fray to battle the Black Knight.

While this was going on, Uncle T-Bone investigated Galleth's report of some sort of monster guarding the castle, exploring a cavern to determine if such a thing exists. It's frankly amazing how versatile the 'Swat Kats' can be with just a hookshot. I asked Dad why one isn't part of the Cooper arsenal. The faces he, Uncle Bentley, and Uncle Murray made were priceless.

What Uncle T-Bone reported back was far less amusing. It turned out the cavern housed a massive power generator...hooked up to a mechanical three-headed dragon! Thankfully, he showed he was quite clever at dealing with such things, and utilized skills he claimed he developed working as a mechanic at a junkyard. Since it seemed to be dormant while plugged in, he left it plugged in and dismantled the necks before climbing into the machine and wrecking havoc on its innards. He was quite proud of himself.

With the recon - and a bit of demolition - done, it was time to try and take down the Black Knight's efforts. Uncle Murray went after the oil production facility in the tavern, Dad and I went after the machines manufacturing the giant robot parts at the shoe-maker's shop, and Sir Galleth took down the power generator in the bakery. The whole job went down without a hitch...and immediately put the Black Knight on the move.

Uncle Razor tailed the Black Knight the moment he made an appearance...and what he discovered shocked us all...

Razor listened carefully to every word he could hear from the Black Knight as he followed the figure, hearing the voice plainly distorted in some way as the figure spoke of 'Cooper' involvement in the events that had occurred. What really confused him as he followed was that the Black Knight seemed...reluctant. One sentence in particular stuck out.

"And little Coco's going to be involved, too...ugh, how did I get myself into this? I'm such an idiot...how am I going to fast talk this one?"

Hearing that, he sent a communication back to the hideout. "Guys, the Black Knight apparently knows you all...and it doesn't sound like they're doing this by choice. I'm following them into the Blacksmith shop to get more info."

"Be careful, Razor," Carmelita replied worriedly.

After entering through a roof hatch, Razor froze. There was no security in the rafters, and he could see the Black Knight plainly...and the figure he was talking to. "So the Coopers recovered Galleth's cane," the figure stated flatly as he unfolded out of the shadows.

"What about it, Seft?" the Black Knight countered angrily. "I can get it back easily. Operation Overlord is almost complete. Even with-"

"The Coopers disabling your observation balloons and all operations in town?" Seft interrupted darkly as he walked alongside the Black Knight. "You are aware that Robyn Hood has stepped in."

"I can handle it!" the Black Knight countered, though the distorted voice sounded...desperate.

"I should hope so," Seft responded easily, holding up a small device with two unmarked buttons. "I would hate to think you weren't as...dedicated as you act."

"No!" the Black Knight called out desperately, reaching for the device...only for Seft to pull back.

"You wouldn't want to push the wrong button by accident, would you?" Seft demanded cruelly.

The Black Knight slammed his metal-clad fist into a nearby gate. "I stole Bentley's time machine plans!" he declared. "I took over this time period! I've betrayed everyone I ever cared about!" Without warning, the Black Knight's armor unfolded, revealing a pink mouse-girl in a form fitting yellow jump suit with safety goggles on. "What more do you want from me?" she screamed out despairingly, tears in her eyes.

As Razor watched, Seft smirked at her. "You know what Le Paradox wants...and you know what I want. Satisfy one of us, and you get what you're fighting for." His tail slowly arced forward, and Penelope tensed up as the tip trailed suggestively along her suit between her breasts. "And I am so much easier to satisfy, after all..."

Penelope flinched back, the robotic armor suit pushing the tail away. "N-no!" she gasped out desperately, struggling to regulate her breathing. "I...I won't betray him like that!"

Seft chuckled darkly. "Loyalty is so...amusing. You've already betrayed him else wise. I wonder which betrayal he would consider worse." He turned away. "Sir Galleth's cane delivered to Le Paradox, the Cooper van and time machine destroyed so they cannot pursue, and Cooper himself inactive. That is what Le Paradox wants..." He held up the device. "And what you want, if you want what was promised." With that, he scurried into a dark shadow and seemed to vanish.

Penelope slumped over in her armor, weeping. "Oh Bentley..." she whispered, barely able to raise her voice, but still completely audible to Razor. "I'm so...so sorry..."

Unsure what else to do, Razor slipped silently away to report...unaware of Seft's eyes on him.

Time Out: We Do Routines And Chorus Scenes

When Uncle Bentley heard Uncle Razor's report, he was enraged. It took everything we could all bring to muster to keep him from charging out to hunt down Seft and 'introduce him to industrial strength Raid'. Even as he kept trying to charge past us with his wheelchair he was trying to mix the incredibly toxic spray. Eventually, we managed to get him to slow down and calm down, telling him that trying to confront Seft himself was suicide...at the very least because, given Seft's track record, he probably knew Razor was listening and expected just that tactic and would be ready for him, and what good would that do Penelope?

That managed to snap him out of it and calm him down, or at least that's the way it seemed. We immediately settled down to plan how we'd fix the present situation...and that meant finding a way to draw Seft out so we could attack him directly. Unfortunately, all we knew for sure of his motives was that he was working for Le Paradox, who seemed to want to collect the Cooper Canes for some reason. At least, that's all we knew of his motivations at the moment. We did our best to plan...and in the process took our eyes off Uncle Bentley...

Bentley wheeled himself into the center of town, where he knew he'd be spotted sooner or later by the guards. That was okay. That was exactly his plan. It just needed to happen before the others noticed he was gone and came looking for him, and without making a ruckus that would draw their attention. It was a matter of luck now...especially as far as which guards he encountered-

"Halt!" a robotic voice barked out. One of the robotic wolf-men had caught sight of him. "You are violating curfew, and you will be-"

Bentley spun to face it. "Take me to Penelope," he ordered flatly. "I'm sure she'll want to see me."

The guard hesitated, and Bentley smirked. That confirmed it, Penelope programmed these guards herself. He'd noticed it while they were working together. She always programmed the drones that operated independently with limited free will and specific programmed directives...and always included a few voice commands that would shift them to a different behavior pattern. And apparently, the one coded into these guards was a request to see her in his voice.

"This way," the guard instructed, pointing towards the castle. Bentley turned his chair in that direction, letting the guard harry him along as though he were a prisoner. Other guards ignored the small procession, keeping the entire trip rather quiet. The only noise was the drawbridge lowering to let him in.

It didn't take long to find the Black Knight, and seeing the robotic armor visibly double-take would have been amusing in just about any other situation. "B-Bentley?" Penelope gasped, her voice distorted by the armor. "What are you doing here?"

"Surrendering," Bentley responded immediately.

The Black Knight, having been somewhat off balance by the double-take, slowly teetered over until it crashed to the ground. "What?" Penelope gasped out as the armor unfolded to make her visible.

"I'm surrendering," Bentley explained simply. "I won't fight you. I care too much about you to do that."

Penelope lowered her gaze, unable to meet Bentley's eyes. "Bentley...how can you still? I...I stole the time machine plans for Le Paradox...I created this whole situation...I...I got into it of my own will when I thought I was doing the right thing...and now I can't get out! I just keep going deeper-"

"Sounds like you need a friend to help you out, then," Bentley offered warmly, wheeling himself forward to be closer to her. "We need to-" "-that remote from Seft, right?"

Penelope's eyes widened in terror and sorrow as she saw Bentley briefly flicker in and out of existence. "Yes...yes we do," she agreed firmly. "And...sooner rather than later. But...but the only way to do that-"

"Get Galleth's cane, smash the van, kill Sly," Bentley interrupted. "Yeah, I know. So let me help you."

Penelope's jaw dropped. "You'd...you'd really help me...kill Sly?" she managed to get out. She didn't even want to kill Sly, not really. She just didn't have a choice in the matter, not with what Seft was holding over her.

"I'm going to help you get out from under Seft's tail," Bentley responded readily. "Each of us has our own strengths with tech, and each of us is quite brilliant...so let's see what weapons come out when we put our heads together." His grin turned a trifle wicked. "Whichever way they're pointing. Let's see what the two of us can make of Operation Overlord."

Penelope managed a sad smile. She understood what Bentley was suggesting...but she didn't know if they'd be able to pull it off. "Alright. Let's go." The armor closed up...and wiggled. "Uh...little help?"

Smiling, Bentley extended the claw arms of his wheelchair to right the fallen armor. Claw in gauntlet, the pair moved deeper into the castle.

By the time we realized Bentley was gone, we had no way of tracking him. Since we'd heard no disturbance in the city, we could only assume he'd gone out into the woods for some nature and air, and hope that Robyn Hood found him and looked after him. We were sure he'd turn up at just the right time to help us.

We eventually determined that our only workable plan of action was to get into the castle and confront Penelope. One thing we'd noticed about Seft was that he adored the drama and challenge of a face to face confrontation. Back in our first confrontation with him, he could have easily just turned his 'attrition room' into a death trap specifically designed to be anti-Cooper, but he instead arranged it to let him fight Dad with his own hand-pincers. And when he had the chance to finish him off, he instead chose to withdraw and fight Dad at full strength later. Well, Dad was full strength now. If Seft was going to get that fight, it would need to be now.

We could have blasted our way in with the Turbokat, but the last thing we wanted was to discover when we least expected it that Seft had a counter to it after wasting our ammo. As a result, we made some bombs out of contemporary resources. Sir Galleth collected some fire bulbs, while Dad managed to win a bottle of Merlin's Magic Powder in the carnival at an archery game...from none other than one of Robyn's Merry Mavericks. Looked like we'd be seeing her in the final confrontation, too.

Time Out: With Footwork Impeccable

Of course, additional assistance did not mean we had smooth going the rest of the time. Things got especially intense later on. With the explosives complete, the plan was to blast our way into the castle, with the explosion being the signal to Robyn Hood and her troops to start their assault from whichever direction they intended to come from. We were going right in the front gate.

However, things blew up in our faces just when things were blowing up...

Murray floated along the top of the moat, carefully placing the makeshift explosives on the drawbridge locks. Once they went off, the gears would spin freely and the drawbridge would drop, opening the way for the group to charge in. As he set them, he couldn't shake the feeling that something was off, though he couldn't think what.

Once the charges were set, he floated back towards shore and set them off. The explosion echoed through the empty town as the drawbridge rapidly descended, opening the gates into the castle itself. Murray quickly raced to join the rest of the group as they charged in.

It was Carmelita who voiced the one thing no one else had put together yet. "Does...does the castle seem...taller than it was before?" she asked wonderingly. "And...where were all the guards in town?"

"A trap?" Sly gasped in shock, trying to skid to a halt.

"Fret not!" Galleth declared, pointing forward. "There is the iron clad maiden!" He started to charge towards the Black Knight, only to yelp as Coco bit down on his tail to haul him back.

"I know it runs in the bloodline, but don't be an idiot!" Coco snapped angrily. "How many generations does it take before the line of the Cooper thieves learns caution?"

"Just look at your father," Penelope said from within the Black Knight as the armor unfolded to reveal her to them. "Plainly, the answer is 'all but one'."

"I don't know whether to be angry about being insulted, or proud of that sick burn," Sly observed jokingly.

"How about we're proud, you're angry?" T-Bone suggested playfully.

"Deal."

Penelope shook her head ruefully. "Enjoy your last laugh, Sly," she murmured softly.

"Lay off, Penelope," Razor countered. "I saw that talk with Seft with my own eyes. We know you don't want to do this."

"And you don't know me at all if you think that means I won't anyway," Penelope countered. "It's time for you to see Operation Overlord...Mark II."

"Mark II?" Murray gasped in surprise...as the upper portions of the castle - the part that made it look taller - slowly lifted.

The stone coating flaked off, revealing pitch black metal with thousands of minuscule gears that shifted every bit around as what had been walls converted into armored limbs, towers hooked together to become a torso, a turret becoming a head, and a second drawbridge a waving tail. What had been disguised as fortifications was revealed to be a massive transforming mecha. One arm leveled out, pointing in an obscure direction as what was obviously a gun popped out the top of the wrist. "Know where it's aiming?" Penelope asked calmly.

Coco gasped as she realized what was in that direction. "The hideout!"

"My van!" Murray screamed out.

"The Turbokat!" Razor and T-Bone added their worries.

A beam of bright blue light shot out, and a blaze of light could be seen in the distance as it impacted. Sly turned in that direction and pulled out his binocucom, zooming in. "They're...they're gone..."

"Sly!" Carmelita screamed out, pushing him out of the way as a massive fist slammed the courtyard, the shockwave scattering the group. "Eyes on combat-ack!" A sticky substance fired out of another barrel, affixing Carmelita to one of the real castle walls.

"I fear no knight of any size!" Sir Galleth declared as he charged, using his cane-lance to swing around a flagpole in an attempt to get a higher angle at the large mech, only to get lightly batted aside by the tail as his cane-lance went flying, caught by a passing Paradox troop on a jetpack, who quickly vanished.

"The bigger they are-" Coco began, only to trip as the flagstones of the courtyard flipped over in a wave to reveal solid steel instead of stone, shaking like an earthquake to send her tumbling into a net trap that held her aloft.

"Coco!" Murray screamed out as he raced towards Coco, only to trip and fall into a pit trap that opened up...over a vat of pudding inset several feet below the ground. "Well, that could have been worse..." he murmured as he floated in the rather tasty goop.

Razor and T-Bone quickly dove behind the nearest cover, drawing their weapons. "If you think we're-" A metal lid dropped down, sealing them inside the cover they'd dived into. T-Bone's curses echoed inside the metal.

Sly stood his ground as he faced off against the metal giant. "You seem to know everything we'd do here," he observed to the mech. "Something that big can't be remote controlled, at least not by anything that'd fit inside your armor along with the controls for the armor itself. So tell me Penelope...who's inside there?" He quickly dove to the side as the giant mech fired another beam of blue light at him...only to land right in Penelope's grasp as a sword was held to his throat.

"Take a wild guess," Penelope growled to him, the blade pressing into his flesh.

A slow clapping could be heard from halfway up the battlements. "Well done, Penelope," Seft observed in wry amusement. "Sly destroyed by two former friends, I never would have expected it. It seems loyalty and devotion are much more potent weapons than I'd anticipated."

"T...two?" Sly managed to gasp out in confusion.

From inside the net she was trapped in, Coco whimpered. "U...Uncle Bentley?"

"And a bonus," Seft murmured as he took in Coco's trapped state. "But you know what you must do, Penelope." He lifted his hand, showing the device with two buttons again. "Finish him."

The Black Knight slowly pressed the blade tighter.

Seft's thumb twitched slightly. "What's taking you so-why would you give the mech a-" Seft turned and tried to lunge out of the way, just too late as the mech's tail erupted out of the castle wall, opening in a net that wrapped around him and bound him tight, the device flying out of his grip.

The Black Knight tossed Sly aside and charged, unfolding to allow Penelope to carefully catch the device as it fell, making sure not to push either button as she grasped it, her face turning into breathless relief. "Got it..."

The torso of the giant mech opened up, revealing Bentley's control center and the van and Turbokat, both completely undamaged. "So you going to tell-" "-what's so important about that now?" he asked Penelope curiously as everyone who saw him and his wheelchair blip briefly out of existence.

As Penelope stared from Bentley to the device in horror, Seft chuckled. "Well, I have to say this is the first time I've been outsmarted in a long time...and never so dramatically. The cane can be recovered, and all else was a very well done trick. A teleportation beam, was it?"

Penelope lunged forward and braced herself in front of Seft. "I'm going to give you one chance to answer honestly Seft, and then I'm getting Coco to read the answer from your entrails!" she snarled out. "Which button calls your assassin off?"

"A-assassin?" Sly gasped in shock.

Seft smirked at Penelope. "All for him after all, hmm? In that case, I have three words for you..." His smirk turned into a vicious grin. "Emergency Temporal Shift."

"NO!" Penelope screamed desperately as she tried to grasp Seft, only for her hands to pass right through him as he faded out.

"Perhaps I'll see you all elsewhere in time," his voice echoed in the air. "Good luck in your guessing game. I wouldn't wait too long if he's already flickering like that, though. Time abhors the unsupported paradox..."

Penelope slumped to the ground, staring at the device in her hands in despair. "Which one...? Which one...?"

After a time, Coco voiced her opinion on the matter. "The fuck just happened?"

"Coco!" Carmelita snapped out angrily. "Language!"

"Sorry Mom, but it was warranted!"

Author's Note

I really did intend to include Robyn Hood and her Merry Miscreants in the final confrontation of this mission...but then I started thinking about what Penelope and Bentley would actually build together...

Best laid plans of mice and turtles, and all that...

Time Out: Time In

It didn't take long for all of us to get untangled from Penelope and Uncle Bentley's traps in the courtyard...especially once Uncle Bentley applied the counter-compound to break down the sticky mess holding Mom stuck. Dad got me free of the net, while Uncle Razor and Uncle T-Bone hauled Murray out of the now empty pudding vat. He'd apparently decided to try and eat his way out, only to discover the vat only had enough pudding to cushion his fall into it.

Then came Penelope's story. And boy was it a doozy...

Penelope sat down in the courtyard, staring at the remote in her hands as everyone gathered around. "I...I can't shift all the blame," she said finally. "I got myself into this mess..." She shook her head slowly. "It all started with the time machine plans, and weapons, and...everything else..." She looked up at Coco. "You remember the conversation we had after Bentley went to the hospital for his spinal reconstruction? About...how I thought Sly was holding him back?"

Coco nodded as everyone else turned shocked looks on the pair. "I remember."

"Well, before that conversation...I'd thought if the time machine were tweaked slightly, it could be used to connect two points in time together, altering the events of the past while more or less maintaining the future," Penelope explained. "That I could...go back in time and keep Sly and Bentley from meeting, while still ensuring that Bentley and I met. That without Sly...Bentley would grow up a bit more like me, and he wouldn't have as many hang ups. It was stupid, impulsive, and wrong...especially going to Le Paradox to get the altered machine built."

"And then we talked..." Coco continued. "And you realized that it wouldn't have worked out the way you wanted?"

"Not entirely," Penelope countered. "While I did realize that...I also realized from the talk that if Bentley weren't who he was, if he didn't have those morals and honor code I found so frustrating...then he wouldn't be the nerd I fell in love with." She turned sorrowful eyes Bentley's way. His only response was a warm, comforting hand placed on her shoulder. Penelope managed a smile for a moment, then continued her tale. "So I raced out to a pre-scheduled meeting with Le Paradox to tell him I wouldn't feed him any more of the plans, and I was going to destroy what I'd already given him and what he'd built from it. But...he had an ace up his sleeve..."

"Seft," Sly concluded darkly.

"Yes...Seft was the technical genius he hired to make the plans work," Penelope confirmed. "And Seft was there at the meeting. He...he knew what I was going to say, and before I could speak up..." She shivered violently. "He showed me this remote, and the plans for it. Half a chroniton is suspended inside of it in a time stasis field, the other half inside a communicator worn by an assassin. This means one signal - a one or a zero - can be sent via the remote to a single point in space-time from anywhere, and anywhen, once the field is deactivated at the other end. And the assassin...is just outside Bentley's hospital room, after his surgery."

Gasps of shock and understanding greeted this statement. "That's what you meant," Carmelita concluded. "One of the buttons tells the assassin to kill Bentley, and one to abort mission..."

"And only Seft knows which is which," Penelope confirmed.

"And in the meantime, Bentley's caught in a Schrodinger's Paradox," Razor stated angrily. "Two possible timelines, one where he's alive and one where he's dead, with the course of events slowly diverging and straining his very existence. That's why he's been flickering."

"And why I kept briefly seeing Gyro Gearloose in his place," Coco concluded sadly. "In the timeline where Bentley dies, Uncle Scrooge would have sent him along to help us repair time to fix the Thievius Raccoonus, and stop Le Paradox..."

Penelope nodded slowly. "And...Seft has been holding it over my head ever since, forcing me to work against you all. I...I was willing to go along with it. Do...almost whatever it took to get the remote and knowing which button to push. Almost..." Tears beaded her eyes. "Maybe...maybe I should have-"

"No," Bentley interrupted firmly. "Penelope, don't think that. You've seen the kind of monster Seft is. There's no way of knowing if he would have kept his word. He might have deliberately told you the wrong button just to watch you squirm. And even if he did keep his word..." Wheeling himself forward, he cupped her hands in his cheek. "My life isn't worth putting you through...that..."

Penelope smiled sadly, tears falling as she put one hand over Bentley's. "I think it is..." she murmured sadly.

"Pray, I'm not certain I understand," Galleth interrupted. "You speak of this device reaching through time and space because it contains half of a crouton?" He gestured to the remote where Penelope had set it on the ground.

"Chroniton," Razor corrected. "A time particle, in essence. Splitting it in half causes the halves to resonate with each other, apparently, so anything that affects one half affects the other."

"And why does that happen?" Galleth asked curiously.

Razor and T-Bone exchanged glances, trying to figure out how to explain it. "Because...it wants to be whole?" T-Bone offered finally.

"Aha!" Galleth declared proudly as he drew his sword. "Then I perceive the solution to our problem. We do not need to guess at a signal. We must free the crouton, like so!" And he brought his sword down on the remote right between the buttons, shattering it.

"NO!" Penelope screamed in fear and despair as everyone else rushed forward.

Bentley let out a scream of pain as energy arced around him, flinging him to his hands and knees.

"Bentley!" Penelope called, clinging to him desperately.

"I'm..." Bentley gasped out as he struggled to catch his breath. "I'm okay...just a little...time singed..." He blinked as he shook his head. "There...there was someone in the hospital...he wasn't supposed to be there. The nurses found him in the hall, clutching at his ear. A...a crystal had drilled into his brain..."

"Are you insane?" Razor demanded angrily of Galleth.

"Verily!" Galleth responded proudly. "It runs in the family!"

"It so does..." Carmelita growled as she struggled to calm herself so she wasn't about to pounce Galleth and bite his face off and turn his tail into a warm scarf. Only the reminder that doing so likely would mean Sly would never be born held her in check.

Bentley's eyes stayed wide. "Is...?" Slowly, he pushed himself up...to his feet. Gasps echoed as he staggered against Penelope...but his legs took his weight. "I...I can walk?" he gasped in surprise.

"The collapse of the Paradox..." Penelope breathed in awe. "All that time energy being released, focused on you...it..." She shifted so she could look at his back through her goggles, data racing across the lenses. "It reversed the damage to your spine! Your leg muscles are a little atrophied, but other than that it's like you were never injured to begin with!" She pulled Bentley into a crushing embrace as she wept.

"Gack!" Bentley gasped out. "Well don't break it again!" His words held no true rancor, however, as he happily returned the embrace.

Time Out: Timing

Yeah, things got really emotional after that, and before we even considered seeking the next time period, we took some time getting Bentley used to his legs again. Not enough that he could walk around everywhere yet, that would take months, but enough to give his muscles some tone again so when we did have months to spare, he'd be able to make a full recovery.

It was as we were helping Bentley walk again that we learned some very startling information...and got a good laugh in the process.

As Penelope and Murray braced Bentley between them as he worked his legs to move, a figure in green leapt down from the battlements to land beside Sir Galleth. "So is there a reason my grandfather just clutched at his head and screamed in agony in three different languages before cursing your name as a reckless idiot?" the figure asked the knight.

Sir Galleth spun in surprise. "M-Maid Marian!" he stammered, bowing low to her. "It is good to see you well-"

"Answer the question, Knight of the Coopers," Maid Marian - or Robyn Hood, as she was dressed - growled angrily.

Sir Galleth's assessment of Maid Marian's looks - especially in the green tights she wore - was quite accurate. She could have easily passed for Carmelita's twin save hairstyle and accent. She even held herself close to the same way, with her longbow in hand much as Carmelita often gripped her shock pistol, with a quiver of arrows on her back that did not look entirely standard. She crossed her arms over her chest as she glowered down at the shivering knight.

"Your grandfather?" Sly asked in confusion.

"There's a reason me and mine have such easy access to Merlin's Magic Powder," 'Robyn' answered readily. "Now, do you have an explanation?" She used her longbow to force Galleth's chin up so he had to meet her eyes.

"I...I freed the crouton..." Sir Galleth stammered. "W...wasn't that a good thing?"

'Robyn' frowned. "Can one of you lads or lasses tell me who hit him on the head that he's babbling about salad?" she demanded curtly.

"He means 'chroniton'," Razor translated, "a...time particle. There was half a chroniton in this device, which was causing a Schrodinger's Paradox..." Noticing a frown and a raised eyebrow, Razor translated further. "It was making Time think our friend Bentley was alive and dead at the same time. When Galleth broke the device, it collapsed the Paradox."

'Robyn' nodded. "Yes, that would explain it," she concluded glumly. "So how much longer is someone going to be playing games with time? It gives grandfather headaches."

"Wait!" Carmelita interrupted. "Are you saying your grandfather is...the Merlin?"

"Well I certainly hope there aren't others," Marian joked. "He gets into enough trouble on his own." She turned to Galleth. "As fond as I am of you, Knight, you need to learn to be more careful. Many more crazy antics like that, and Grandfather might just decide it'll be worth the headache to not have you in the family."

"I shall endeavor to be more cautious, my lady," Sir Galleth promised fervently. "I shall accept whatever chastisement you deem appropriate for my inconsiderate actions."

'Robyn' nodded with a smirk. "You know where in the woods to meet me," she told him firmly before turning to go.

"I shall bring your lash!" Sir Galleth promised excitedly. "And my double-padded saddle!"

As the pair raced off, everyone stared after them looking...a little broken. "That is not something I needed to know about my ancestors..." Sly finally managed to say.

Deik-Beck let off a sequence of beeps and whistles, plainly laughing uproariously.

To be fair to Deik-Beck, it probably would have been as funny to me if it hadn't technically been my ancestors, too. I am a Cooper, after all, even if I'm not a raccoon.

...for some reason, my declaring that made Deik-Beck...sad.

It took us a while to get our composure after that, and Uncle Murray used that time to keep working on Uncle Bentley's legs. Once we did get our composure, we turned our focus to pursuit of Le Paradox. That meant explaining how our time machine worked to Penelope, since she didn't have one of her own and while she knew what time periods Le Paradox was targeting, she didn't know exact dates. Surprisingly enough, she had an answer for us.

"So you need an artifact from one of the other time periods Le Paradox is targeting," Penelope deduced once she heard the explanation. "Well, there's only two more we need to worry about, the very early 11th century, and the 17th century."

Sly blinked in surprise. "That's when Salim al-Kupar and Henrietta Cooper were around," he mentioned in surprise. "Why is he going after those time periods?"

"The Cooper Canes," Penelope explained. "Remember what I said about him trying to turn his time machine into a Paradox Machine?" Seeing blinks at the name, she explained further. "The altered time machine to connect two points in time? Well, it turns out to connect two points in time you need something from those points in time directly connected to the personal timelines you're trying to alter. He's after the Cooper Canes because he intends to use them to drastically alter the Cooper Clan history...and his own family history. I don't know more than that, though. Just which time periods he's targeting."

"So we need artifacts from those time periods," Carmelita deduced. "I snagged a coin from the warehouse just before I sent myself through time to avoid getting snatched. Looks Arabian in design, so it might take us there."

"We should save that," Penelope pointed out. "For some reason, he wants to hit that time period last as far as collecting the canes, no idea why. Probably connects to whatever else he's planning. So we want to go to the 17th century first."

"Well where are we supposed to get pirate artifacts in Medieval England?" Sly demanded crossly.

"Pirate artifacts?" Penelope asked intensely.

"Yeah, Henrietta Cooper was a pirate captain," Sly explained quickly. "Is that important?"

Penelope hung her head. Reaching into the Black Knight armor, she pulled out a pouch that jingled and poured out a bunch of silver doubloons. "Seft's idea of a joke," she offered glumly. "He paid for 'incidental expenses' with 30 pieces of silver..." Her face lifted a little as Bentley wrapped an arm around her.

Sly lifted one of the doubloons and examined it carefully. "Yup, definitely 17th century," he confirmed. "This should take us right where we want to go. We just need to make sure we don't sink when we get there."

"I can take care of that!" Bentley declared. "Everyone into the Overlord!" He turned and wheeled his chair back into the giant mech.

Curiously, the others followed him in as Penelope eagerly moved her Black Knight armor into it as well. "We need to connect a few cables to the time machine," she explained as she got to work.

It didn't take long before the cables were connected...and the giant mech reconfigured itself into a plane as Sly put the doubloons into the artifact scanner. A burst of speed, and they breached the time barrier, hurtling to the 17th century. As they arrived, the plane converted into a ship, extending a wood-colored cloak as it set down in the sea with the van and Turbokat in the cargo hold.

...okay, I admit that was pretty cool. But why the heck did it set Dad, Uncle Murray, Uncle Razor, and Uncle T-Bone to squeeing?

Time Out: Yar Har Fiddle Dee Dee

It didn't take us long to determine where we were. Despite it being in the 17th century, the place didn't look any different than it did in the modern era, when those who rebelled against the modern world clung to the old style of pirate life. This was Blood Bath Bay, as always an absolute haven to cutthroats, vagabonds, fugitives, and murderers. We would have to be especially careful when it came to exploring here. Not only did we risk disrupting history, a wrong move could be instantly fatal.

We found an empty dock and weighed anchor, tying off as we prepared to explore. We had a couple of objectives. The first was to find out who Le Paradox had from the present as his agent here in the past, and if they had any contemporary allies. The second was to locate Henriette One-Eye Cooper, the infamous pirate captain and Dad's ancestor in this era. Given the time frame, I made sure each of us was dressed in the local style - bandanas, eyepatches, ragged striped shirts, and so on - before anyone went looking, and it was Mom and Dad who would be going out to investigate, with Uncle Razor backing Mom up and Uncle T-Bone backing up Dad. Until we were more certain of who was who, we were going to try and keep technology and magic out of sight.

Mom's mission proved rather easy, as she instantly recognized the pirate vessel Death's Head, a modern vessel designed like one of this era, and a ship belonging to the modern pirate Captain LeFwee, known as the 'Smartest Man on the Seven Seas'. As for Dad looking up Henriette...

Things went...interesting.

Sly carefully made his way through the ramshackle wooden shanty town, searching for any sign of Henriette Cooper, her ship, or her crew. He'd tracked through the entire town it felt like, but hadn't seen even the hint of a ringed tail aside from his own. "Now where am I supposed to look?" he demanded ruefully.

"You know, there's one spot we skipped," T-Bone pointed out. "A spot that it's kinda logical a pirate would be in when on shore."

"And where's that?" Sly demanded crossly.

"The pub."

Sly blinked at that. "You know, I feel really stupid that I didn't think of that."

"Try feeling virtuous instead," T-Bone suggested. "Easier to swallow."

Sly quickly led the way back to the pub. "You really think my ancestor would be here in the pub guzzling booze?" he asked as he pushed the door open.

"...depends," T-Bone began awkwardly. He pointed to a table in the corner. "Is that her?"

Sly could only stare. Sitting there in a skin-tight blue outfit that was half pirate outfit and half thief suit was the most voluptuous raccoon female he'd ever laid eyes on. Based on the description from the Thievius Raccoonus and her portrait in the Cooper Vault, it could only be Henriette...but the portrait and description didn't really do her justice. She was lithe and curvy, with a figure that could almost put Carmelita to shame, with long, luxurious black hair that swept down her back. She had delicate facial features with a heart shaped face, and a single bright blue eye that could make a man's heart stop when it shimmered. Even where she was missing one hand, the wound was delicate yet made her seem strong.

The impression probably would have worked better if she weren't swilling booze half over herself, half on the table, and only a few mouthfuls here and there managing to make it down her throat. "More grog!" she bellowed at the bartender, who quickly obliged with a fresh mug before she put her head back down on the table to try and drink.

"Yeah...good luck with that," T-Bone offered, nudging Sly forward. "I'm going to stand over here." He gestured to the door, from which he could watch the entire bar.

Sighing, Sly made his way over to the table. "Henriette Cooper?" he asked carefully.

"Who wants to-hic!" Her angry retort was interrupted as she turned to face him. As her single eye managed to focus somewhat blearily on him, however, her angry grimace became a warm grin. "Who wants to know, cutie?" she continued, a drunken purr in her voice.

Sly felt the hair on the back of his neck and in his tail stand on end. "I...need to speak with you about an...important business matter," he managed to say. "Privately, if possible."

Henriette chuckled wickedly. "Oh, don't you move fast?" she slurred as she stood up and sauntered over drunkenly before draping herself over him, holding herself up by an arm around his shoulders. "Got a place in mind, or will any alley do?"

"Ma'am," Sly managed to stammer out. "T-this is highly inappropriate..."

Henriette chuckled throatily. "Ya talk funny fer a pirate..." she purred wickedly. Her eye locked on Sly's.

Sly was about to speak up...but then he felt the knife point in the back of his neck.

"You can either get out of my bar now," Henriette growled, suddenly stone cold sober, "and tell LeFwee that if he thinks I have that little pride he ain't as smart as he thinks he is, or I can gut ya here and write that message with your entrails across that tub he calls a ship! Hook or not, ship or not, crew or not, ah am still the most dangerous woman to ever sail these seas, and I will fry him up and eat him one of these days yet!"

Sly froze, unsure what to do. T-Bone attempted to come to his rescue. "You need to let go of my friend, miss," he growled as he reached out to grab her by the shoulder.

Before Sly or T-Bone could even blink, Henriette had spun and delivered a kick to T-Bone's left pudenal nerve, a knee to his chin as he doubled over, a stump strike to his solar plexus, and flipped him over to smash into a nearby table. She then had the sword he'd been equipped with out of his sheath and was swinging it at Sly, but he managed to catch the blade in the hook of his cane.

"We don't...work for LeFwee," Sly growled out as he struggled against the woman's surprising strength.

The woman blinked as she took in the shape of the hook. "...I can see that," she observed as she jerked the blade back, sending Sly off balance and catching him by his chin. She examined his face carefully. "...yes, I see the resemblance now. Pity. Ever since LeFwee captured the Admiral, you're the cutest face I've seen in these waters. I was actually considering it."

T-Bone managed to laugh uproariously through his pain as he caught sight of Sly's face.

I tried not to laugh when Uncle T-Bone told us about that. I really did...

Time Out: Being a Pirate is All Right With Me

Once everyone finally stopped laughing at Dad, we turned to more serious matters. Henriette had been more than happy to follow a Cooper back to the hideout - which in this case was our ship - and we needed information. That meant Henriette telling her story.

It wasn't a pleasant one...

Henriette leaned back as she began to retell her tale. "It started...a few months ago. Things were as they'd always been, with me robbing pirates and ships from distant nations blind with none the wiser and hiding the booty where only we knew where it was, and digging up treasure when we found maps. Then that Captain LeFwee showed up. He styled himself the Smartest Man on the Seven Seas, and claimed he could out think, out sail, and outfight any other pirate on the waters. Quite a few pirates took up that challenge, and when he beat them he made them swear loyalty, so he's got quite an armada at his command.

"O' course, one o' the things that keeps places like this safe is that we aren't a threat to the various governments as individuals," she continued dryly. "So one pirate captain amassing an armada drew immediate interest...and got me a call from one o' my regular...contacts." She smirked mischievously at that, though there was no joy in her single eye.

"The 'admiral' you mentioned?" Sly asked carefully.

"Aye," Henriette confirmed. "Admiral Kyuubi Flametail Vulpine, the most dangerous fox to ever sail under Her Majesty's banner. He's tasked with protecting Her Majesty's territories from all sea-borne threats, and he's th' first Royal Admiral ta pull it off...cause the first thing he did was team up with me."

"Team up?" Carmelita asked in shock. "Wouldn't teaming up with a pirate get him in trouble?"

Henriette let out a bark of laughter. "Only if anyone found out! None o' his own crew would ever spill th' beans cause he got his rank by winning so many naval battles while personally ensuring he never lost a single man. He lost a few ships, but always came back with a full crew and often a captured galleon or three. Their loyalty ta him is unshakable...much like mah own crew was..." She lowered her gaze briefly. "But that's a different part o the story. Anywho, he knew I was the most dangerous pirate on these waters, and knew that mah crew only stole from other pirates and worse. So he showed up in my own bar, walked right up to my table, and offered to buy me a drink." She grinned at the memory. "I nearly laughed him outta the bar, but he just sat there with that cheeky grin...and then he laid out his offer. In exchange for me feeding him information I picked up regarding danger to the colonies or anything else that might be of significance and agreeing to not harass Royal ships in their territorial waters, he'd ensure I had a safe, happy, wealthy home ta retire to when ah was ready ta leave the seas."

"How would he guarantee that?" Bentley asked curiously. "I mean, I'm not sure how much of what I've learned in history class is true, but would he really have that much authority-"

"By takin' my name when he married me," Henriette barked out, grinning at the stunned looks that got. "That was his offer. In exchange for helping him become absolutely invaluable to Her Majesty, the Cooper line would become nobility. Ah wasn't gonna say no ta that, since I do need ta think about my descendants...and besides, I'd encountered him on the seas a few times before he was Admiral, and always found him rather handsome." She lay back as her eye misted in memory. "And as I found out that day, he's amazing in bed, with no qualms about a bride who wasn't virgin. Didn't even offend him that he wasn't my first time."

Carmelita struggled to find something to say...and to stop blushing.

"Course, when he came ta talk ta me about LeFwee's antics, he got ambushed," Henriette growled darkly. "Dunno how, but Lefwee faked one o' my coded messages about where ta meet, and now Kyuubi's LeFwee's prisoner. Ah tried ta free him...but LeFwee made it plain th' only way I'd get Kyuubi free is if I challenged him ta something he called a 'Davy Black' challenge, wagerin' my ship and mah crew against his...and the challenge was for who could find th' most buried treasure in a period of time. Despite all the maps I had...somehow I lost...

"Lost me ship...me crew...even me hook..." She stared at her stump. "The symbol of me line...and ah didn'a even save Kyuubi. The bastard's still got him...and ah've only got a knife and me bar to me name now..." She slammed her clenched fist on the table. "How?! I know every inch o' these waters, and all the islands! How could he know of buried treasure ah didn' know about? It doesn't make sense!"

"It does when you take into account he's from the future," Razor pointed out. "Well, our present really."

"What's that got ta do with anything?" Henriette demanded irritably.

"He has access to modern charts of where treasure was buried in the now that was excavated at later dates," Razor explained. "He could go straight to where he knew the biggest hauls would be, dig them up, and then move on without any searching. His charts would be a lot more exact than the ones of this time, too."

Henriette stared at Razor for a time. "Are ya saying...are you telling me that feathered bastard cheated?"

"Uh...yes?" Razor allowed nervously, flinching back from the absolute fury that set that single eye aflame.

Henriette grabbed the table - which easily weighed at least 150 pounds solid wood - and with her one hand hurled it out of the room with a roar of rage. "I'll have his guts fer garters, his tail for a hat, and I'll roast the rest of him over a slow fire while he's still alive before making him watch while I eat his still beating heart! Nobody cheats Henriette One-Eye Cooper and lives ta tell the tale!"

It took about an hour for us to get her calmed down enough that she wasn't going to charge straight out to try and tear LeFwee apart with her bare hand. It then took another six for the bruises to heal.

Time Out: Do What You Want

Once we were ready to make a move, we knew there were two things we needed to do immediately. The first was to retrieve Henriette's Hook before LeFwee could pass it on to Le Paradox. The second was to take LeFwee's treasure charts, so we could find a way to prove him a fraud before all the pirates he'd managed to bamboozle into his service. Of no less importance but of slightly less urgency was locating where LeFwee was holding Admiral Kyuubi and freeing him, along with his crew. After that, we needed to foment a proper pirate rebellion so LeFwee's 'power base' would be destroyed before the Royal Navy arrived en masse to deal with it, as that would drastically alter history no matter what the outcome of the battle.

From what we were able to observe and what Henriette could tell us, there were only two possible locations where anything LeFwee considered of importance would be kept. The first was on LeFwee's personal flagship, which resembled the ships of the present era but was equipped with modern engines and weaponry hidden in the wood. The second was the Skull Keep of Bloodbath Bay, which LeFwee had usurped as his personal fortress. Unfortunately, getting onto his flagship wasn't possible yet.

As such, all we were able to do was investigate the keep as best we could, which meant not using anything that would draw a lot of attention or freak out any of the locals, since the last thing we wanted was for LeFwee to realize he had active opposition before we had achieved at least some sort of victory. That meant no technology, and no sight of a ringtail that couldn't be explained.

Penelope volunteered to make the first investigation attempt. None of us were entirely comfortable with the idea, but it was plain she felt she needed to make up for what she'd done, and to prove herself all over again. Eventually, it was decided the first excursion to the keep would be Uncle Bentley, Penelope, and I, and hoping between the three of us we could manage...

Coco, Bentley, and Penelope carefully made their way from rooftop to rooftop towards the skull keep, each hiding their presence in their own way. While Bentley's wheelchair was difficult to camouflage, he'd managed to give it a cloaking field that would make it resemble an ordinary chair as long as it wasn't in motion. Coco had her invisibility technique in full force, and could not be seen at all. Penelope still had her jump suit and goggles, but with Coco's help had colored both a pattern of mixed browns that exactly matched the tiling of the roofs they were leaping across, along with an added hood. With the hood pulled up, she could lay flat on a rooftop and vanish almost completely from sight.

When they managed to get in sight of the skull keep, however, their preparations seemed to be a moot point. The drawbridges were all up, and guards were patrolling the visible roofs and the path around the small island it was built on. "Well," Penelope murmured thoughtfully, "there's certainly something important there."

"The hard part is getting in and out with whatever it is, and our hides intact," Coco observed worriedly. "Still, one step at a time..."

"There's bound to be a back way in and out," Bentley observed idly. "LeFwee styles himself the smartest man on the seven seas. No way he'd trust his men if he has to boast about that."

"Well, you're certainly the smartest man I know," Penelope purred playfully. "Where would you put the back way in and out, and how would you hide it?"

Bentley blushed happily at the flirtatious praise, then turned to look. "Well, the big issue is the water. It makes a good defense since it's deep enough to be dangerous for swimmers, too shallow for ships, and with too many eyes to sneak in via a rowboat. So the best way to have a hidden back way in would be some floating wood - like crates and the like - to leap across like stepping stones, but anchored to the bottom with the exact right length of chain so they don't move too far beyond where they need to be for the path...and positioned such that they're just out of sight of the patrols."

"Like that?" Coco asked, pointing to a crate floating under a rocky arch...with another crate just barely visible around one side of the arch within jumping distance.

"Looks like it," Bentley agreed as the trio made their way over, carefully leaping from crate to crate until they made their way all the way around to the back of the island, and a hidden platform with a door into the keep. A quick check, however, revealed that the door was locked. "Didn't think it'd be that easy-"

Penelope pulled out a small tool and stuck it into the keyhole. It vibrated for a time, and the door clicked silently open. "There we go," she offered warmly.

"Penelope, what is that?" Bentley asked in shock.

"Do you know how many times my key to the lab wound up inside one of our experiments and getting bent ever so slightly out of shape?" Penelope responded wryly. "I eventually got tired of constantly having to replace any number of keys and invented something that could open any keyhole door by scanning the internal mechanisms of the lock and mimicking the key shape." She smirked as she held up what looked like an oddly configured Swiss army knife. "I call it my Bad Key Machine."

"Did you get that from a video game?" Coco asked curiously.

"N-no!" Penelope stammered quickly. "I absolutely did not get it from a video game! Come on, we need to get inside!" Turning, she quickly opened the door and ducked inside. Smiling to each other, Coco and Bentley quickly followed her inside.

Yeah, she totally got that invention name from a video game. Heck, she introduced me to the game she got it from.

Time Out: Cause a Pirate is Free

Coco, Bentley, and Penelope stared around at the inside of the lower levels of the skull keep. The dank stone walls arced drearily over them, and the intermittent drip of water echoed through the tunnels. Shackles hung from the stone, clinking and clanking idly from the passage of air. Devices of torture lay against the walls and on tables, showing recent use. Blood dripped from the rusty metal points, mixing with the puddles of water that filled divots in the stone steps from frequent transit, filling the air with the stench of mold, mildew, and pain.

Coco staggered a bit as it assaulted her. "Stronger senses are a double edged sword," she muttered, struggling to hold down her nausea so as to not add the scent of vomit to the mix. The nausea stopped as Penelope slipped an oddly-configured, beak-like mask over her muzzle, filling her nose with a pleasant rose and daffodil scent. "...thanks?" she asked in surprise.

"Plague mask," Penelope explained as she tied her own on after giving one to Bentley. "Picked them up back in Galleth's period. They thought the sweet scents warded off the plague evils. It doesn't work, but makes for great low-tech gas masks if all you want to do is filter out scents."

"And we definitely want to here," Bentley agreed. "Don't suppose you've got the robes, too? Would make great disguises."

"Unfortunately not," Penelope admitted. "I only have so much room in hidden pouches in this bodysuit."

"It'll do," Coco allowed, trying to feel the structure with her magic through her hooves. "Down leads to a dead end, while up opens up to the roofs. Since the roofs were guarded, we should check down first."

"Lead the way," Bentley agreed, following along carefully as he walked his wheelchair down the stairs after Coco, doing his best not to splash too much.

It didn't take long for them to reach the bottom, and the single cell holding a still-living occupant. The fox chained to the wall looked filthy and bedraggled, as well as partially soaked. His military coat was torn and stained with what looked like some form of booze, and he was chained to the wall to the point he couldn't move a muscle.

"I'm going to guess that's Admiral Flametail," Penelope observed carefully. She found herself blushing slightly at the sight of just how muscular he was under the torn coat. "I see why Henriette went for him."

"Penelope!" Bentley whined.

"Hey, I'm over hunting muscle heads," Penelope promised as she laid her hand over Bentley's. "I've got my guy." She then glanced slyly at him. "Besides, I caught you eyeing Henriette when she wasn't trying to dislocate your shoulder through the wheels of your chair so she could use you as a bludgeon to get past Murray."

Bentley looked down, glad the plague mask hid his blush. "Fair enough."

"If yer just gonna talk..." the fox slurred, opening his eyes blearily, "...can...can ye do it elsewhere? 'm tryin' ta sleep..."

"We're here to bust you out!" Coco spoke up quickly.

"Fat chance o' that," Flametail muttered. "These chains and shackles got no keys. 'm welded here. Gonna be stuck here long as the keep stands, just t' keep Henriette in line...stupid LeFuck, if I were free I'd soon show him...but no, he caught me off guard, welded me here, and...*hic*"

Bentley blinked in surprise. "Why would you deliberately keep a prisoner drunk?" he asked Penelope in confusion.

"Because that plus this kind of security is necessary to keep him from busting out?" Penelope offered. "If we could get him off the wall, we could take him back to the hideout and work on breaking the chains."

"Do...do ya think ya could gimme another drink?" Flametail asked hopefully. "The casks...over there..." He gestured to several casks against the opposite wall. "Jus...dun wanna face the world a failure..."

Coco carefully examined the casks...then grinned widely. "I think I can get him off the wall. Penelope, can you get the cell open?"

"Sure," Penelope agreed, easily opening it. "So what are you going to do?"

"How come you're called Flametail?" Coco asked curiously as she stacked the casks against the stone wall of the cell.

"...mongst other things, 'm fireproof," Flametail offered.

"How are you with explosions?" Coco continued as she pushed her magic into the stone, feeling the structure.

"Ask Henriette!" Flametail joked, chuckling drunkenly.

"Fire in the hole," she said softly, dashing to Bentley's wheelchair and tossing one of his bombs in among the casks before ducking behind the stone. Bentley and Penelope ducked with her.

The bomb went off, and the tightly packed alcohol in the casks exploded alongside the one cask of flour Coco'd managed to load with them. The stone wall burst apart, leaving the chained up Flametail blinking as he found he could move as the smoke cleared. "So...about that drink?" he asked hopefully.

"Sorry," Coco offered apologetically. "No drink."

"None?" Flametail asked in upset. "But...it was all there. Why is the rum gone?"

"I had to use it to shape the blast," Coco explained. "Otherwise I might have damaged the structure-"

"But why-" Flametail's body flexed, the chains and manacles shattering off of him with the one inch of movement he had to flex in. "-is the rum-" His eyes blazed as three extra tails unfurled from underneath his torn coat. "-gone?!" he shouted, slamming his clenched fist into the wall. White light raced through the wall, and the entire thing exploded outward with the force of an earthquake.

Coco, Bentley, and Penelope could only stare. Eventually, it was Penelope who found her voice. "You know...I'd wondered how the more 'magical' seeming of the Cooper Techniques worked..."

"So how are we going to get him back to the hideout and Henriette with all the attention that's going to draw?" Bentley demanded. "We still need to try and find her hook!"

"Oh, you mean this?" Flametail asked, reaching into one of the extra tails that had sprouted and pulling out the hook in question. "LeFwee was down here bragging and showing it off to 'torment' me, and he never noticed my extra tail swiping it out of his pocket. Picked up a few useful skills from Henriette in addition to information."

"You...don't seem as drunk as a minute ago," Coco observed carefully.

He gestured to the hole he'd made. "The rum in my blood had to go somewhere."

Time Out: And That's Not Ideal

Once Henriette had control of her ship again, we were ready to go confront Lefwee directly, as that was the last ship we dealt with to avoid LeFwee figuring out what was going on. On the way there, Mom and Kyuubi had a...rather interesting conversation...

As the ship sailed back towards the Death's Head, Carmelita stood by Kyuubi's side. "So you're a navy officer?" she asked carefully.

"Aye," Kyuubi confirmed. "Her Majesty's strong arm of the law upon the seas."

"I'm surprised one who upholds the law was so sanguine about such...brutality," Carmelita observed mildly, glancing towards one of the ships where Henriette had been especially nasty with LeFwee's man.

"Then ye don't understand how the law works in this era," Kyuubi answered softly. "The rule of law and justice extends only as far out on the seas as far as the power of the throne can reach...about four hours on a fast ship from the nearest port. Beyond that, there's only one law on the high seas: kill or be killed." He turned to look Carmelita right in the eye. "You fight to survive. You fight the elements. You fight your own ship. You fight your own body as it adjusts. You fight the sea itself, and that last is a battle you can never truly win, only hope to survive. And ya fight every other boat out there that thinks yer an easy mark.

"Only two things keep you alive on the high seas...Fear and Respect. The more brutal you are, the more others fear you. The more effective you are, the more others respect you. Respect means other ship's captains are willing to banter with ya instead of crossing swords. Fear means they are wary of crossing ya. The reputation of your flag keeps yer crew safe.

"And LeFwee - a complete newcomer - trounced the Cooper Ship at what they were best at, robbing Henriette of ship, crew, hook...and reputation. If she doesn't go after him as brutally and ferociously as possible, with as much mysticism and fear tactics as she can manage...then her and her crew are dead men sailing the moment you and yours move on."

He turned back to stare out at sea. "And I won't let that happen," he continued simply. "Henriette ain't the only decent folk on that ship, and I won't let them die 'cause o' that bastard bird." He sent a smirk Carmelita's way. "Not ta mention she ain't yet swiped that jeweled chalice she's famous for accordin' to that book o' yer 'coon's."

Carmelita tensed up. "You shouldn't have been reading forward in time like that," she said with a scowl. "You could disrupt-"

"Henriette already read all of it," Kyuubi pointed out. "Ya really expect a pirate ta play by the rules?"

With everything ready, the strike happened all at once. All the pirate ships surrounded the Death's Head, coming in to attack from every direction at once. Despite all the firepower, Death's Head managed to stay afloat. A few shots revealed that it was actually a modern metal boat with a wooden exterior...and modern weaponry. Eventually, we had to move our ship into position to battle, and that held attention long enough to take the battle onto Lefwee's decks.

And that's when things started to go wrong.

The assault on LeFwee's ship the Death's Head was in full swing. Sly, Coco, Carmelita, Razor, and T-Bone were attacking by leaping across the masts, trying to cut off LeFwee's possible escape routes. Murray, Bentley, and Penelope were on deck, carving their way through his men to ensure he didn't have backup. Kyuubi stood at the helm, making sure no one could take control of the ship.

Henriette confronted LeFwee directly amongst the rigging. "Ye never shoulda crossed me, bird!" Henriette snapped out. "Now you're gonna roast!"

"Ye may be a toughie for your era, lass!" LeFwee called out as he brandished his sword. "But ah'm the smartest man on the seven seas in this or any era! I'll keelhaul ye before the day is done!"

They clashed sword to knife as they leapt about the rigging, Henriette managing to outmaneuver LeFwee in amongst the mainmast. However, LeFwee quickly leapt up higher on the mast, taunting her to pursue. Raising her hook, she launched it. The hook latched onto the crow's nest, and she swung and pulled herself up by the retracting chain.

When she was too far up to withdraw, she saw the Paradox troop - the gas masked troop - lean over and seize the hook. LeFwee swung his sword and expertly yanked the base of the hook from where it was affixed to Henriette's stump, sending her falling to the deck...to land on Bentley.

"Ret!" Kyuubi called out in fear, rushing to her side.

"Bentley!" Penelope called out, kneeling beside him.

"That...bastard..." Henriette growled out as she got to her feet, wincing.

"I'm...okay..." Bentley managed to call out as he struggled to move. "I can...still feel my legs..."

"Not fer long, laddybuck!" LeFwee roared out as he brandished his cutlass. "Yer all gonna fall this day-"

Penelope seized a cutlass from a nearby pirate and slammed her feet together. Springs in her boots sent her flying upward to Lefwee's height. before he could react, her blade had caught his, pushing it back as her leg came up to kick him right in the nuts with the force of her launch.

"T...that's dirty fighting..." LeFwee managed to squeak out as he staggered. "Yer gonna pay-AAARGH!"

The scream was because Penelope's cutlass had lashed out, cutting off LeFwee's blade hand at the wrist. Before he could react further, Penelope delivered a cup-palm strike to his ear, sending him tumbling down to the deck below. Penelope simply stared down at him angrily. She then held out the cutlass blade down...and dropped it.

It landed millimeters from LeFwee's beak, grazing his neck with the sharp edge of the blade.

"Let's go," Penelope growled as the Paradox goon had already made off with the hook. "We're done here. Bentley needs medical attention, and Henriette and Kyuubi can handle things from here."

We didn't argue. It was time to get going.

Time Out: Oh, I Come From A Land, From a Faraway Place

We intended to make a quick stop in the present to get Uncle Bentley some medical treatment, but Felicia warned us against it. Apparently, time was in a rather strong state of flux just now, and taking Bentley to the present might cause backlash since he was the focus of a recently collapsed paradox. Instead, we had to use the gold coin Mom had grabbed from Le Paradox' warehouse to head to Ancient Arabia, in search of Salim al-Kupar. We just had to hope someone there would be able to give Uncle Bentley some treatment.

Salim al-Kupar was a founding member of the legendary 40 thieves, so we expected to have plenty of help at this stage...though weren't surprised to discover that wasn't the case. Apparently, by the time of our arrival, most of the original 40 had retired already...and there was no trace of Salim. On top of that, several of the guards wandering around were armed with modern weaponry bearing Le Paradox's mark. We would need to be careful if we wanted to find our way around without drawing excessive attention, and possibly getting caught.

It was during our scouting mission that Uncle Bentley's condition started to worsen...and Penelope stumbled across an unexpected ally in our quest...

Penelope carefully but desperately escorted Bentley around the desert oasis city as he struggled against his back and his wheelchair, gasping for breath as they sought out both a clue to Salim's location and a hideout for the gang...or somewhere to hide Overlord Mark II - their transforming plane/boat/mech - as a native building. "Come on, Bentley," she whispered quietly. "It won't be far now..."

"I'm...I'm okay," he gasped out, sweat beading his brow as he pushed against the pain. "I just...need to rest..."

"Pain of the back?" a purring voice suddenly asked from an alley. "I can help with that. Come, come..." A beckoning hand guided them towards the alley. "Quick, before the outsiders see."

Penelope did not want to trust the beckoning voice, but she knew she didn't really have a choice. Bentley needed treatment, and now. "Okay," she whispered as she guided him into the alley.

Before she could react, she and Bentley were both seized by many hands and hustled into a building. To Penelope's surprise, the place was filled with women her age in...well, given the time period, it was highly appropriate to refer to it as 'harem garb', even if it showed more than even modern interpretations of it suggested. As she looked around, she considered herself lucky to find her eyes on a girl wearing as much as a harem vest and thin silk pants.

An unknown vixen garbed in a veil, thin top, vest, and pants quickly pushed Penelope into another room. "The girls will see to your man," she insisted firmly, "but if you do not wish to bring more danger to him, you will change quickly. You stand out like a diamond in the dungheap!"

Caught up in the intensity, Penelope changed costumes as instructed...and found herself in an outfit not unlike that worn by the one who'd pushed her in, complete with veil. At first she considered going without the veil, but quickly set the notion aside. It wouldn't have been provided if it weren't needed.

Stepping back out in the outfit, she found Bentley laid out on his stomach as many of the girls expertly tended his back and legs, the expression of absolute relaxation on his face showing they'd definitely eased his pain. "He's going to be okay?" she asked worriedly.

"The damage is not severe," the vixen answered readily. "My girls know their work. The medicines we have will ease things, and careful exercise will repair the rest."

As she turned to face Penelope, the mouse girl gasped. "Ca-" she began, only to cut herself off. Yes, this girl bore a striking resemblance to Carmelita...or at least a younger version. Penelope estimated her to be at most 21, if not 19. Then again, given the time period, that wasn't that young by societal standards.

"You have heard of me?" the woman asked in surprise. "I am Ca li-Ta. What is it you were seeking, that had your man in such state?"

The commonality of name...Penelope decided to gamble. "We're seeking Salim al-Kupar," she offered softly. "We wish to aid him in driving out the outsiders that hunt him."

Ca li-Ta's eyes narrowed. "And you assume I know something?" she asked carefully.

"Let's just say...I have reason to believe you either are or will be romantically involved with him," Penelope explained carefully.

One eyebrow lifted. "Do you now?" she asked coolly. "And where have you gotten your information, hmm?"

"That is...difficult to explain-" Penelope began, only to gasp as the vixen blurred forward and she found a knife at her throat.

"Simplify it," Ca li-Ta growled.

Penelope swallowed nervously. "Would you believe we're time travellers and he's the fourth male of the line we've encountered in a relationship with a vixen almost identical to you in appearance?"

Ca li-Ta stared at her firmly. "Your words are nonsense...but your voice has nothing of deceit." She pulled the knife back. "Your man will stay here. Return with another male of the line and one of these vixens, and I shall heed your words. Fail, and he dies."

Penelope smirked. "It seems personality is consistent as well." With no more than that, she slipped out to contact Sly and Carmelita.

It didn't take long for Penelope to return to where she left Bentley, with Sly, Carmelita, and Coco in tow. Ca li-Ta gazed upon Sly and Carmelita in surprise. "Though age is quite different, the resemblance is uncanny," she murmured in surprise. "You are the male of the line?"

"Sly Cooper, at your service," Sly greeted with a graceful bow.

Ca li-Ta nodded. "Salim is in a boat out back," she observed calmly. "If you can return him to himself, I will be in your debt. Our children need him."

"Children?" Sly asked in surprise.

"He's not himself?" Carmelita inquired.

"See for yourself," Ca offered sadly, gesturing to the back door, where a boat could be seen moored on the river.

Time Out: Where the Caravan Camels Roam

Sly, Carmelita, and Coco stepped into the curtained off area of the boat Ca li-Ta had guided them to, uncertain what to expect. Salim al-Kupar was one of the most legendary of the Cooper ancestors, after all, and that legend held a sense of power to it. On the other hand, they'd seen what Le Paradox's handiwork had done to the other ancestors, and Ca's assertion that Salim was 'not himself' left them with concern about his ability to help them bring some semblance of normality back to the situation.

What they were not prepared to see was an elderly raccoon dressed like a rich merchant indulging himself with berries from a bowl. "Salim al-Kupar?" Sly asked nervously.

"And who are you?" Salim demanded incisively, not even bothering to look up from his bowl long enough to see who was talking.

"That's...rather complicated," Sly allowed worriedly, unsure how he was going to explain the situation if Salim wasn't going to even bother looking at him. "I'm...a thief new in town," he began carefully, "and I was hoping I could learn from someone as great as you. How about you come meet the rest of my gang, and I can explain further?"

"How about you go lick a camel's hump?" Salim snapped angrily before reaching for some nuts.

"Okay...look, I know you're in trouble-" Sly began awkwardly.

"You think you know trouble?" Salim interrupted angrily as he cracked the nuts open in his hand with a single squeeze before eating the meat within. "As young as you are with that on your arm?" He gestured dismissively towards Carmelita. "Why don't you go try telling the sandstorm you know how much life blows? It might be in the mood to listen to you, but I am not!"

"There's no need to be rude-" Carmelita began.

"I do not speak to unveiled women!" Salim snapped out angrily. "They are either someone else's wife and trouble I don't need, or no better than they should be and even worse trouble! Now get out!"

"No better than they should be, hmm?" Ca suddenly asked firmly as she stepped in, stepping around a fuming Carmelita as she pulled her own veil aside.

Salim seemed to wilt in on himself as she entered. "Ca li-Ta..." he wheedled placatingly. "Please, put your veil back on? What will people think?"

"The truth, probably," Ca responded acerbically. "After all, I am an unmarried woman with children, am I not?"

"You know we can't wed when my wealth is as a thief," Salim countered, though he remained pleading in his tone. "And you know I will never turn my back on you or our children, and will always provide-"

"Will you?" Ca snapped out, strutting forward in a way that demonstrated her anger and managed to flaunt her sensual curves. "Samun and Ki-sa still nurse but are without proper clothes, and La-di already prowls the streets with that monkey friend of his!"

"Bu-bu is a perfectly respectable-"

"Do you want our son having the reputation of 'street rat'?" Ca demanded angrily. "He is the one you say will grow to be your heir, after all! The one you want great things for? But no, you will just sit here in your boat and whine and whine, instead of doing what is right for the city, your children, and me!" She turned around. "But I am just a woman, after all. What right do I have to complain, when I'm no better than I should be?" Putting her veil back on, she stomped out of the boat.

Salim stared after her despairingly, then turned grumpily towards the trio. "So she told you I was here?" he asked flatly. "Fine. The reason I am in this state is because of a new Fine Lady in town, an elephant calling herself Miss Decibel, whatever that's supposed to mean. She's been throwing lots of money around, pretty much buying up the whole place. Ca's House of Secrets is one of the few she doesn't already own outright!"

As he ranted, Sly and Carmelita exchanged glances. It was relatively easy to see who Le Paradox's ally was here. Coco, however, kept her eyes on Salim, even as she slipped on the Mask of Dark Earth and gripped the Staff of Moonfire. While she didn't actually need a magic boost right now, she felt if she was going to get through to Salim to get his willing cooperation, she'd need to look the part of someone who knew ancient magic. The Mask resting atop her head rather than over her face did that quite well, she thought, especially with the glow of the Staff's hook.

"So I gathered my three remaining comrades who had not abandoned the city after having enough money to go wherever they wished to pull one last heist on this Decibel lady!" Salim continued, beginning to pace. "With the city under that lady's sway, I wanted enough I could afford to take Ca, our children, and her whole establishment across the desert to Agribh, where I hear the Sultan has interesting ideas regarding how to handle the succession when he has only one daughter...who is about La-Di's age." He gave a playful smirk. "I do want to look after my family, after all." The smirk faded into a scowl. "But as soon as we made it into the place, we were confronted by evil beams of light, sound with teeth, and fireworks that shot repeatedly and ate flesh and bone! She has a Djinn at her command, that is the only explanation! There is no other way she could wield weapons that cannot exist and deny all that has been discovered of science and magic so far!"

He slumped back onto his divan. "I had to abandon my thieving outfit to keep them from tracking me. I tried to sell it for enough to get Ca and the children out of town...but the elephant lady is determined to hunt me down! I have been...stuck, ever since. If you can bring me the outfit and show mastery of its hidden power, then maybe I can assist you."

"Perhaps I can do more for you than that," Coco spoke up, stepping forward so she could be seen. "I may be mistaken...but I believe your problems predate Decibel's arrival...or perhaps I should say, your real problem?"

Salim frowned somewhat nervously. "And what would you know?" he demanded cautiously.

"I have been trained in both the mystic and medical arts," Coco explained, "and if the right ingredients are available, then I believe I could mix you up a tonic that can prove most...beneficial. Is this of interest?"

Salim stroked his beard. "I'm...listening..."

Coco turned and handed a list to Sly. "Father, I have most of what I need and can work here...but you and the others will need to locate a few herbs, berries, and other things. It should not be too difficult."

Dad and the others worked together, both on getting my list of ingredients and getting Salim's thief outfit back. Getting the outfit back was rather straightforward. The merchant who had the outfit stayed very secure, so it had to be straight up bought with flawless gemstones, ones Dad, Uncle Razor, and Uncle T-Bone were easily able to retrieve. A few modifications to the Binoc-U-Coms from Bentley and Penelope made it easy for them to locate the ingredients I needed as well.

To our surprise, not only did the outfit allow Dad to literally slow down time - unlike the Slow Time Cooper Technique which only enhanced reaction and awareness to make it seem time had slowed - but Dad was able to spy on a meeting between Miss Decibel and Le Paradox himself! Not only did we discover part of Le Paradox's plan - falsifying a 'royal lineage' for himself - Dad was able to trick the locations of Salim's compatriots out of Miss Decibel!

Once everything was gathered, the entire gang met up in the second of three floors in Ca's establishment...the lower floor being the business floor, and the third being the living quarters for herself, Salim, and their children. While Dad showed off the thief outfit, Ca fetched some refreshments while I finished mixing up the 'tonic'...

"So this outfit used to belong to a genie?" Sly asked Salim as he looked over the new outfit. It certainly fit the environment with the vest, tiny hat, and harem pants, and Coco had confirmed she could feel the magic in the staff.

"Yes indeed," Salim confirmed, not really paying attention as he was focused on Coco and the 'tonic' she was mixing up. "So...this will help me?"

"Indeed," Coco confirmed as she finished mixing it. "I just need to measure the dose." She poured a small amount into a cup. "Taking it undiluted would be...most unpleasant, so I would suggest mixing it with water."

"Not wine?" Salim asked in disappointment.

"It would dull the effects," Coco confirmed as Salim ruefully filled the cup the rest of the way with water before stirring. "Now drink up."

Shrugging, Salim downed the contents of the cup in a single swig, only to shudder at the taste. "Pfaugh! Perhaps just some juice next time, if not wine?"

"It might react with the fruit," Coco explained softly. "However, I am certain that it will be of great assistance to you...and Ca li-Ta."

"Do you think so-" Salim began, only to freeze as he saw Ca li-Ta enter from the upper floor.

Rather than the outfit she wore on the 'business' side, she was clad in a simple silk robe that gave her complete modesty, but still shaped well to her curves. "I do hope you 'travelers' will enjoy my cooking," she offered playfully as she set out the dishes. "I'm certain it isn't what you're used to."

"I'm sure it'll be great!" Murray declared excitedly as he began to chow down. "Delicious!"

Ca chuckled as she moved towards where Salim was sitting. "Well, as long as everyone's comf-MMM!" Her voice was cut off as Salim startled her by leaping to his feet and pulling her into his arms and locking lips with her, holding her tight against him. She struggled at first, but quickly melted into both kiss and embrace. When Salim pulled back, her eyes were wide and quivering. "Salim..." she breathed desperately before glancing at the others. "W-we're not alone..."

"Let me fix that," Salim responded eagerly, grabbing a nearby rope and zipping them both up to the third floor.

"So...what problem were you helping him with, anyway?" Bentley asked curiously as he and the others began to eat.

Coco smirked. She had to tell them this way. Looking up the rope, she called out, "Check with me if it lasts more than 4 hours!"

By the makers, their faces! And I think Murray's spittake actually shot completely over the boat out the window!

Time Out: Where It's Flat and Immense and the Heat is Intense

It was only 3 hours later when Salim came back down from the upper floor, looking very well pleased with himself and quite grateful for my 'tonic'...especially as I assured him that - despite what the others thought - it was more in the nature of a long term treatment than a short term solution, and would have an overall improvement on nerve function and blood flow...after which I then explained it in more contemporary terms. The look on Mom's face when Salim clarified that it "would make his scepter younger" was priceless!

I can hardly wait to tell Mrs. Ruby how much mileage I got out of that one recipe.

Once everyone else got over their humor or embarrassment as the case was, we got down to planning how we would deal with the situation we'd been left in here. We needed to rescue Salim's compatriots, thwart Miss Decibel's efforts, and find a way to confront Le Paradox directly. Luckily, Salim still had his Cooper Cane, which would hopefully make all of these much easier.

There were three of Salim's compatriots that we needed to rescue, so we decided to split into three groups in order to retrieve them all at once. We wanted to make sure skills were evenly divided based on what might be needed, which meant we needed someone with muscle, someone who could hack, and someone with thieving skills in each group...and some way for those not in Salim or Dad's group to identify themselves as friends, since they'd recognize the genie/thief outfit Dad would be wearing. Thankfully, Salim was able to pull through there with a special code phrase to identify members of the 40 thieves.

I found it oddly hilarious when I heard what it was.

Salim was sent to the tower where The Panther was being held, as the Cobra Climb technique he'd demonstrated would be most useful for ascending the heights. Bentley would be backing him up remotely from our hideout for any required hacking. Uncles Razor and T-Bone took the task of rescuing The Lion, as that would involve sneaking past several defensive turrets...something they were naturally skilled at from their own city. Penelope was going to back them up with an RC chopper to drop smoke bombs for cover, just in case they needed it.

Uncle Murray, Dad, and I - by process of elimination - would be rescuing The Tiger. This would all prove rather interesting...

Penelope marveled as she watched Razor and T-Bone make their way through the city streets, completely undetected to the turret sensors even without her smoke bomb cover. Their fur color was rather close to the shade of the sand of the streets and the stone of the buildings, and a pair of similar colored robes made them almost invisible when they held completely still. They simply held still in an area until a sensor wasn't pointing in their direction, then moved swiftly across an area until they were about to be detected before seeming to vanish as they froze against walls or the ground. These guys would be scarily effective as thieves, she thought to herself as she watched.

Before long, the pair reached the location where The Lion was being held. T-Bone hefted the door open, letting the pair in. After that, Penelope only had their audio report.

"Looks like the little rat's being mind controlled by some sort of mesmerizing music," T-Bone stated calmly into the comms. "I'm guessing trying to snap him out of it physically would be a bad idea?"

"Definitely," Razor confirmed. "Be patient, T-Bone. I'll have this system hacked in two shakes of this guy's tail."

"He's got a lot of tail to shake-"

"And done."

A new voice, old and querulous, broke in. "What? Who are you? What are you doing here? Where is here?"

"Chill, dude," Razor spoke up quickly. "We're friends. Salim sent us to rescue you."

"How do I know I can trust you?" the old voice - The Lion, presumably - demanded suspiciously.

"Klatu Barata Nicktoons!" T-Bone intoned dramatically. "Ow! What gives, Razor?"

"You are not allowed to hold the Necronomicon," Razor snapped angrily.

"What? I said it right!"

"No, Salim said the phrase is Nikto. Seriously, Day the Earth Stood Still is your favorite movie! How'd you get that wrong?"

"Actually, it's Niktu," The Lion corrected with a chuckle. "But none of us are able to keep that straight, not even Salim. So it's the first two words that are important."

"Well, as long as that means you trust us," T-Bone allowed in relief.

"That depends," The Lion chided. "Did you bring me any Cobra Tails? I'm starving."

Sly, Murray, Coco, and Deik-Beck carefully entered the Taxi Shop. As scans had shown, there were no guards present to prevent the trio from reaching The Tiger. The only real obstacle was a great many traps between themselves and The Tiger, who was plainly visible at the opposite end of the shop sitting on cushions beneath the mesmerizing music from the strange phonograph.

"Looks like a narrow path at the edge over there," Sly pointed out, indicating the far edge of the large chamber.

"Or Uncle Murray could just throw me over with Deik-Beck," Coco pointed out. "Deik-Beck could shut down the machine, and you could signal The Tiger from there."

"I like that plan!" Murray declared happily as he picked Coco up.

"Are you sure you can throw her that far?" Sly asked worriedly. "If she fell short..." He stared worriedly at the spinning buzzsaws and thrusting spears covering the floor.

"The Murray is nothing but muscle!" Murray insisted. "This is nothing!"

"Propellers extended!" Deik-Beck offered helpfully.

Growling, Murray hurled the pair across the room. Deik-Beck did end up needing to activate his propellers...to keep them from hitting the opposite wall. Once they landed, the metal crab hacked the control system for the phonograph, causing it to shut down. As The Tiger came back to his senses, Deik-Beck stashed the device to bring back to Bentley for analysis.

The little rat on the cushions slowly came back to himself, only to blink as he caught sight of Sly. "Salim? Is that you? Did you find the fountain of youth?"

Sly blinked. "Uh, no, I'm not Salim..."

"La-di?" The Tiger gasped. "But you're a young man already? How long have I been trapped in a trance?"

"...not La-di either," Sly corrected.

"Samun?"

"...my name's Sly."

The Tiger tilted his head. "But...you look so much like Salim..."

"An evil wizard is playing games with time," Coco explained. "He has a vendetta against Salim's family. We are from another part of time that he has tampered with, and are here to battle him and stop his work."

"Oh, that makes sense," The Tiger allowed. "Does that mean you can give Salim better tips on the camel races, so he can finally pay me back all the money he owes me?"

"Unlikely," Coco admitted.

"Then what good is time knowledge anyway?" he demanded before hopping down to make his way back to the hideout.

Once everyone was back at the hideout, Bentley was able to analyze and research the devices we brought back, and we were able to formulate the rest of our plans.

Time Out: It's Barbaric, But Hey, It's Home

The first stage of the plan we developed was to plant a bug in Miss Decibel's private library, where she'd retreated to after discovering that Salim's three associates had been liberated. Originally, Salim was going to do it given it would likely require his climbing skills to pull it off...but Deik-Beck had volunteered. After demonstrating how he'd adapted the Cooper Family invisibility technique into an active camouflage that could render him completely invisible to any and all detection save touch, and how he could move quiet enough that even sound can't give him away, Dad gave him the job.

I expected him to be able to do the job on his own relatively quickly and without incident. Surprisingly, he was gone longer than anticipated...

Deik-Beck had absolutely no trouble infiltrating the private library while invisible. It was child's play to leap from rooftop to rooftop before scaling the wall to the window. The stonework of the era was full of microfractures to the point of having visible cracks and chips he was easily able to sink his legs into for climbing.

Once inside, he saw that Miss Decibel was completely distracted by her own music and plotting, completely oblivious to all around her as her classical tunes filled the room. Her back was to him.

He went over his inventory. Three vases that would broadcast rock and roll when set up to distract her and get her out of her office so he could plant the bug without her noticing. One carving of Le Paradox - who Miss Decibel apparently was sweet on - that contained the bug and would blend in with her office decor. ...one needle soaked in prehistoric knock-out venom, potent enough to KO a T-Rex. The same dose on Miss Decibel would be instantly lethal.

It would be so easy...

Why is this even a debate? She is an enemy. Enemies should be killed.

Coco would not like.

She wouldn't even have to know! The elephant dead, the needle disposed of, her safe and brain ransacked, we could go after Le Paradox without problems!

Not Cooper way...

Oh don't give me that! Henriette didn't even hesitate before killing someone if they were in her way, and would kill to deliver a message! This era is, if anything, even more brutal!

We should be better...

Why? Give me five good reasons why we should be better, why we shouldn't take the easy way to get what we want, clear the obstacles for the others, and achieve our goals?

One, because is easy way. If Cooper way was easy way, would not be Master Thieves. Would not be legend.

Silence reined within Deik-Beck. ...the legend is important...

Two, belong Coco. If kill, Coco responsible. Paris. Venice. Clock-La.

The memories came back, even those where Deik-Beck as Deik-Beck were not present for. What the rage had done to Coco when she conjured her golems...when she had inflicted the curse on Clock-La, giving her exactly what she wanted...how she had reacted when Deik-Beck had obliterated the boat - and goon - who had been trying to kill Carmelita.

Three, if kill to save life bad, kill to make easy worse. What benefit kill here?

What benefit? She is the enemy! As long as she lives she will continue to be an obstacle we must work around! There was a pause. She will continue to be a threat to Coco.

Four, might need her later, the response came, ignoring the last point. Can use live, useless dead.

...I concede the point that it's rather hard - not impossible, but difficult - to get viable use from a corpse.

Five, disappoint Coco.

Really? That's your final defense against killing? Raucous laughter echoed within Deik-Beck, not exiting the metal being to influence the world around it. I only care that my legend, a part of the Cooper legend, is eternal! Why should I care if the pony I used to get close enough to act is disappointed in me? Why should I care how she feels about something she won't even know about?

Why do you care?

Hesitation. Confusion. Rage. What do you know? You are just a mask I wore to get close to them! You...you don't even exist unless I will it! How are you able to color myour thoughts as though we were equal? How are you alive?

Coco love.

Frustration. Doubt.

Remember love?

...sorrow.

Hate chip broken. Eternal without it. Still define hate?

...regret...

Be better?

...why? You...you are alive independent of me...somehow. Why do you care if I am better? You don't need to try to be better. You can just be better, without my burden of sin...without my colored perceptions of right and wrong, of power and weakness, of ends and means. Why are you trying to...redeem me? To save me?

Coco love.

...I am a monster. I...I'm using her. I'm...not worthy-

Be better. Be worthy.

Derision. Disdain. ...hope. You think I can?

Made me.

Silence.

Mission?

Deik-Beck calmly made his way around the library, placing the three vases with the transmitters inside in out of the way places to make it difficult for Miss Decibel to locate them and shut them off. Once all three were placed, they were activated remotely and began to blare rock and roll throughout the library at incredible volume.

Miss Decibel let out a shriek of rage as she began to rampage through the library in search of the source of the music, shaking the structure with her stomps and trumpet blasts.

Catharsis. Schadenfruede.

Better?

...better.

Deik-Beck silently moved in to place the bug statue on Miss Decibel's desk, then slipped back towards the exit.

Wait.

Deik-Beck turned and watched. While the transmitters had been placed in out of the way places, they had been designed so that, if broken, they would dissolve into meaningless bits of metal and pottery shards. They had also been placed deliberately precariously...and as Deik-Beck watched, the shaking of the building Miss Decibel caused with her rampage resulted in the vases slowly tipping off their precarious posts, disassembling the mechanicals, and falling to crash and burst apart on Miss Decibel's head one after the other, leaving her dazed and slumped over, clutching her head. "Ooh..."

Smug satisfaction. Much better...

Be good! More fun!

...I think I can accept being an anti-hero...

Deik-Beck silently left the library, making his way back to the Cooper Hideout.

Time Out: When the Wind's From the East And the Sun's From the West

When Deik-Beck returned, he seemed...happier than he'd been before. At the time, I believed that taking on a solo mission to help us had helped him finally be at peace with his origins as a creation of Clockwerk's, and that he truly felt himself to be a Cooper now. I didn't say anything, because I was just happy that he was happy.

From the bug, we learned that Miss Decibel was making the counterfeit documentation for Le Paradox's 'royal pedigree' that he wanted to create for himself in the present. From what Uncle Bentley had discovered going over the bits he'd managed to get a look at, if we didn't manage to put a stop to this, his wealth and power in the present would make him untouchable...much like what would happen to our own family if our lineage was revealed. Unfortunately, he'd deliberately used some of the same families, and the very existence of his documents would cast doubt on ours if we tried to confront the revelation directly that way.

Uncle Bentley had determined we needed to get through a large security door in the lamp shop, but it was always heavily guarded. Although we didn't know what was behind it, we knew that was where Decibel would deliver the completed papers to Le Paradox. We needed some sort of distraction in order to get past the guards. Uncle Bentley was wracking his brain for a good distraction...only for Ca to provide an idea that caught us all off guard...

As Bentley and the others pored over the plan, Ca sauntered up with a smile on her face and some drinks for everyone. "Having some trouble with your plan?" she asked thoughtfully.

"Little bit," Bentley replied distantly. "Trying to figure out a distraction that will draw the guards attention, but won't disrupt the timeline too much. Considering there's anywhere between three and seven guards, balancing that severity of distraction is...difficult."

"Yes," Salim agreed, "and despite my intention to take Ca and the family out of the city, it would not be good for the timeline - or our reputations - if we destroyed large portions of it, even if you do have the resources to do so easily." Here he shot a glower at T-Bone, who rolled his eyes.

"May I have a look?" Ca asked diffidently.

"Please, lend us your eyes dear," Salim offered warmly as he pulled back from the available blueprint. "Perhaps you shall see something that has escaped our notice."

Carmelita raised an eyebrow. "Given her 'mere woman' rant when we first met you, and the usual attitude of this era - not to mention your rant at me - I'm surprised you're being so accommodating."

Salim chuckled softly. "In regards to the heated words of our early meeting, I apologize. Most of that was, as your gifted daughter perceived, were the result of...other issues, and irritation being directed in general to all other possible focuses. As for Ca and thieving..." He grinned widely. "Very few are aware that there were actually 41 thieves..." He rested a hand warmly on Ca's back.

She smiled warmly at him as she leaned over the blueprint, the position drawing attention to the fact she'd changed back into an outfit from the 'business side', a loose hanging harem vest and what could only be described as a thin silk sarong along with a few bangles on wrists, ankles, and ears. As Sly and Bentley tried not to stare, Murray avoided Salim's stern gaze, and T-Bone and Razor freely ogled, she traced a few lines on the diagram. "You've seen some of the guards?" she asked curiously.

"Yeah," Bentley confirmed. "They're all built even bigger than Murray, so disguising as one of them to sneak in wouldn't really work even if we did know the right passwords-"

"Then they are all male?" Ca interrupted incisively.

Bentley blinked in surprise. "Uh...yeah," he confirmed, though his voice was confused. "Is that important?"

Ca smiled. "Guardsmen hired for their muscle rarely have much brain. Do not think 'How do I distract guards'. Think 'How do I distract big, stupid men'." Slowly lifting herself upright and raising her arms over her head, she sent a shake down her body that sent her bangles to jingling...and other things to jiggling. "That is easy, and possibly profitable."

As everyone around the table stared at her in shock, Salim frowned worriedly. "While I know full well that you could easily seize the gaze of any number of guards, the numbers are...worrisome. Only three, and you could easily dispatch them-"

"Dispatch?" Razor asked in surprise.

Smirking, Ca spun her left wrist and flicked one of the bangles. A soft click and one of the gems suddenly jerked forward like a hammer before retracting. After pantomiming holding that wrist near Salim's temple, she made the same motion with her right wrist. This time, a thin sharp blade shot out, hidden by her palm. A quick pass and a piece of fruit on the table fell into tiny pieces, with no sign of the blade when she turned her hand back around.

Salim grinned proudly as everyone stared in awe. "She was my student before she was my beloved," he explained happily. "Even now, there are days I'm not certain who learned more from whom." His grin faded as he turned back to Ca. "But if there are more than three guards, they might...well, guards hired for size and muscle are rarely hired for morals, either..."

"Which is why I always had backup when I used that distraction routine," Ca confirmed as she spun lightly around the table. "Whether your strong allies ready to snipe from afar..." Her hands came to rest on Carmelita and Penelope's shoulders. "Or backup dancers equally talented in dance or combat. And while the men have been off chasing answers, the girls have been taking lessons, I understand."

"So much for surprising Sly," Carmelita grumbled under her breath as Sly stared at her in shock.

"L-lessons?" Bentley asked in shock as he stared at Penelope.

"W-well there wasn't really much for me to do between jobs," she began defensively, her cheeks somewhat flushed, "and I wanted to stay close to you anyway, to be sure you were okay. And..." Her blush grew rosier. "Well, since you are okay and your legs and back are better, I thought, well, maybe once we got back to the present safe and sound we could...spice things up?"

Silence hung over the table for a time. Then Deik-Beck beeped. "Someone must say: best plan ever!"

I had a hard time not laughing my head off at that. When Uncle T-Bone, Uncle Razor, Uncle Murray, Uncle Bentley, and Dad all muttered 'too right' under their breaths, I failed to hold back. This was going to be interesting...

Time Out: And the Sand in the Glass is Right

While the plan was accepted as something we needed to do, Mom and - well, I guess I can call her this now - Aunt Penelope were surprisingly nervous about it. Well...surprisingly until I thought about it. Sure, they took the lessons, but Mom only expected Dad - and possibly me if she forgot to lock a door - to ever see her actually making use of them, and Aunt Penelope only expected to perform for Uncle Bentley. Performing for total strangers - especially total strangers who might decide to 'take liberties' - was something they weren't necessarily emotionally prepared for. While Mom was more adjusted given our time in Ancient Japan, the Geisha outfit did cover a great deal more than this one did.

Ca was able to talk them through it, as well as give them a few special pointers, as well as planning the entire routine. Mom and Ca were going to pull a mirrored 'twin' routine at first, with Penelope coming in after. Not only would her stark difference catch attention, but - according to Ca - the larger men of this era found special appeal in smaller females.

Uncle Razor had to rebuild the component Uncle Bentley had been holding when that was said. ...and another one after Uncle T-Bone asked Deik-Beck to record 'the show'.

Once everything was prepared, we moved into position in the Lamp shop...

The interior of the lamp shop was well lit, the light from the outside passing through multiple stained glass windows at various angles to shine down varicolored spotlights on the carpeted floor, almost like a modern dance club. It was almost picturesque...save for the completely modern sound-system installed near the entrance to the shop floor.

The gang hid carefully in the long, shadowed passage down from the shop entrance to the floor. Across the floor from the stairs was the door in question, a massive green frame with three large wheels to turn to open, the wheels and carvings on the door itself in gold. In front of the door were nine massive black-furred gorillas dressed in green silks, hunched over as they waited patiently for something to happen.

Salim sucked his lower lip as he caught sight of that. "There are so many..." he murmured worriedly. "And so big...each of them is easily double the size and weight of any of you, and they are pure muscle. If they decide they want more than a show..." He shuddered, turning back to Sly. "I am no longer certain this is the best plan."

"Don't worry," Coco offered warmly, lifting up a hoof-ful of needles. "Each of these has a rather strong knock-out toxin laced into the metal. Each one should be enough to make one of them woozy, if not knock them out. I'll stay back here and throw if any of them start getting too forceful."

"And we do not just do that why?" Salim demanded worriedly.

"Duh!" Murray pointed out logically. "If the guards notice their number dropping or getting woozy without explanation, they call for backup."

"Thus the distraction," Bentley murmured worriedly. "You sure you're up to this, Penelope?"

Penelope nodded firmly, though she kept her arms wrapped around her small frame. While she'd filled out a bit more compared to when she'd first joined the gang, next to Carmelita and Ca li-Ta, she still felt rather flat and understated. "I'm sure," she confirmed. "I...I need to do everything I can. I..."

Bentley rested his hand on hers. "You don't have to push yourself to make up for anything," he offered warmly. "None of us hold your mistakes against you-"

"The forgiveness of others does little good if she has yet to forgive herself," Salim observed pointedly.

"...what he said, Bentley," Penelope offered sadly before giving Bentley's hand a reassuring squeeze. "But thanks."

"Enough talk," Carmelita stated firmly. "Let's go."

Most of the group stayed back as Carmelita and Ca moved into the light. It shone down on their identical outfits, small purple tops that just barely held their breasts in check bedecked with tiny golden bells, partially transparent purple silk harem pants, pointed purple shoes, thin purple veils, and golden bangles on wrists and ankles. "Hello, boys," they purred seductively in unison as they went back to back, giving the gorillas matching 'come hither' gazes over their veils.

As all nine gorillas could only stare, Deik-Beck moved swiftly to behind them, plotting the path for the rest of the Gang...and coincidentally placing himself at the perfect angle to record the show as requested.

As the gorillas moved closer and began to hoot and holler, the two vixens began their dance. Acting as mirrors to each others movements, they swayed their bodies in snake like movements, stretching out one arm or leg and wriggling it enticingly to set the bangles to jingling, before turning and dancing towards each other and bringing their bodies tantalizingly close to touching, only to spin around each other as they sent a shake up their entire bodies for enticing jiggling.

At this point Murray, Razor, and T-Bone had all made it to the door, and were slowly starting to turn the wheel to get it open. T-Bone and Murray were working on the lowest wheel, while Razor had climbed up Murray's back to get to the next wheel up. Much more jingling could be heard as the gorillas began tossing coins at the two vixens.

Smirking at each other under their veils, the two spun apart...and Penelope slowly sauntered onto the stage. She wore an outfit similar to that of the other girls, but in red silk with green shoes and hairbands, her long pink tail whipping back and forth with her movements to set the tiny bells tied to the end jingling. She moved slower as she mimicked movements from the vixens' earlier dance, almost shyly presenting herself as she swayed and strutted. The gorillas continued to hoot and holler and throw money...and despite trying to see all of her, none of them noticed yet that her top was oddly bundled as compared to Ca and Carmelita's.

By this point, Bentley and Salim had made their way over to the door, moving to get ahold of the highest wheel to try and get the door open. Bentley used the robotic arms of his wheelchair to help, though he found himself almost constantly glancing back over his shoulder at Penelope...though whether out of worry or enthralled fascination, it was impossible to tell through his fogged up glasses.

Noticing his eyes on her, though, Penelope took her dance a bit further. Bringing her hands up to cross in front of her breasts, she hooked the bangles on her wrists into her top...then spun as she pulled her arms apart, revealing that her top was in fact a carefully folded red silk veil large enough to stretch from wrist to outstretched wrist, and now only a pair of tassles gave her any semblance of decency behind the almost see-through veil.

At this, the animalistic hoots and howls of the gorilla guards reached a fever pitch, and one started to lunge towards her...only for another to grab hold of him in an attempt to get there first. This quickly devolved into an all out brawl as the nine gorillas tried to fight through their compatriots to be the first to reach the girls. To encourage this further, the three girls turned their backs to the guards before shaking their rears enticingly.

Less than five minutes later, the hoots and howls were replaced by pained groans as the last gorilla slumped into unconsciousness. Carmelita turned her eyes to the rest of the Gang. "How come that door's not open yet?"

Razor chuckled. "Guess that old song's right, huh T-Bone?"

"Which song?" T-Bone asked, unable to tear his eyes off the girls.

Chuckling, Razor sang the four lines he meant.

Arabian Nights, like Arabian Days
More often than not
Are hotter than hot
In a lot of good ways...

Couldn't really argue Razor's point there. I don't even find the bipedal figure attractive, and I had to admit this job was one of our 'hottest'.

Time Out: Come on Down, Stop on By, Hop a Carpet and Fly

Once Coco made certain all of the guards were actually unconscious and not faking it, the group got ready to move forward, Murray and T-Bone pulling the door open. As they did so, however, Salim spoke up. "Sly," he began carefully, "I am thinking Ca and I should not go any further with your group."

"Why's that?" Sly asked curiously.

"I have already passed my greatest wisdom onto you," he explained calmly, "the last of my friends are all retired, and I've had enough snakes, scorpions and climbing for three lifetimes." He noticed the odd tension that crossed the entire group at the mention of scorpions, but didn't comment on it. "Besides, Ca has been badgering me since La-di's birth that I should stop my romping and settle down to actually be a father, spending less time thieving and more time teaching him the family secrets...and I am thinking she is right." Wincing, he reached down to rub his knees gingerly. "Your daughter's tonic may be making my scepter younger, but it isn't doing much for the rest of me. Beyond that, I somehow doubt your two ladies will be comfortable wearing outfits like this into battle, and battle is certainly what you will be walking into."

"You've got a point there," Sly allowed, glancing at everyone else before getting nods of agreement. The way Carmelita kept trying to shift her outfit to be more concealing and the way Penelope was now hugging hers as tight to herself as she could manage while blushing as red as her veil told him how they felt about it. "Alright Salim, we couldn't have made it this far without you, but we can handle it from here." He patted Salim companionably on the shoulder. "You enjoy your retirement, and parenthood. Trust me, it's nearly as stressful and exhausting as thieving..." He glanced towards Coco with a smile. "But far more rewarding."

"I shall be looking forward to it," Salim agreed happily as Coco blushed happily.

"We'll rejoin you once we're more presentable," Carmelita promised, "either on foot or via Overlord. Penelope can pilot it at least as well as Bentley or Razor."

"Want one of us to come back with you?" T-Bone asked curiously as he held one side of the door. "Just to make sure you all stay safe?"

"Pfeh!" Salim countered, waving it off. "I am not that old yet, and I am still a Cooper! I will keep the ladies safe if they need it. Besides, it is not like they are dainty hothouse flowers themselves. Between the three of them, they could probably run circles around me, let alone whatever we end up facing."

Sly chuckled knowingly at that, as he couldn't really argue. Still, he couldn't let the group go just like that. "You be careful, okay Carmelita?"

"Don't worry so much, ringtail," she countered playfully. "I've got everything under control."

"And I'll be fine too, Bentley," Penelope called out before the turtle could speak. "...just as soon as I get this top wrapped back up properly..." She started to struggle with the fabric until Ca came over to assist her.

Leaving them to it - after one last hug from Carmelita for Coco - Sly, Murray, Bentley, Coco, Deik-Beck, Razor, and T-Bone ducked through the door before letting it close.

In the distance, they could see Le Paradox's blimp docked and refueling as massive energy cells glowed green with electricity across all the interior walls of the structure. Laser security doors separated the path they were on from a walkway, and the walkway from the path to the actual dock itself.

"An underground docking bay for the time-travelling blimp," Bentley marveled as he looked around. "No wonder we didn't see it floating around like we did in Japan."

"Just how long has he had to do all this?" Coco asked wonderingly.

"Considering he has controlled time travel available, as much as he wanted," Razor pointed out. "He could have easily dropped his agents off in each time period with money and modern resources, then come back a couple years - or even decades - later for the results he wanted. We're the ones stuck following around behind him Epoch style to try and clean up the mess."

"So what's the plan now?" Sly asked of Bentley and Razor.

"The control room for the laser grids is over there," Razor pointed out, gesturing to the far right. "However, there are two guards there. We need to get them out of there, and this security grid dropped so we can manipulate the controls to drop the other one."

"Or we could send someone who could duck under this laser grid, take out the guards, and hack the controls," Bentley suggested, gesturing to Deik-Beck.

"Oh yeah," Razor agreed sheepishly. "It's been a while since T-Bone and I worked with robotic AI. I forgot how useful they can be."

Deik-Beck beeped smugly before skittering under the laser grid and racing to the right. He didn't bother to be stealthy as he charged into the control room, catching the two guards off-guard. He saw one was a large male gorilla, while the other was a much smaller female felinoid of some sort he didn't immediately recognize. Acting quickly, he lunged for the male guard's face, grasping his head like a face-hugger as he flailed his arms wildly. The female raced forward to help...and Deik-Beck injected the male with a needle to knock him out at just the right moment to cause him to fall forward and pin the female face-up underneath him. He then quickly jabbed the female with a smaller dose to leave her unconscious...then tugged her rather skimpy top down to ensure anyone who stumbled across them would get the wrong idea, thus ensuring very little investigation into how would be given, nor would any of their words about what actually happened be believed.

Deik-Beck then leapt onto the control panel and hacked in, plugging himself directly into the controls and shutting down both security grids. Leaping free, he then rushed to rejoin the group...only for both laser grids to go back up - along with an alarm - as soon as they were through it.

"Did Deik-Beck miss a trap?" Bentley asked worriedly as two laser devices lifted out of the abyss to either side of the dock and focus a deadly field into the center of the path to the blimp.

"No," Sly spoke up angrily as he readied his cane, the area they were on slowly swarming with Le Paradox's hazmat suited rodent troops. "The timing of that was too good. Someone knew we were, is watching us, and had backup controls to the security here and set off the alarm just as we got here."

"How very clever of you," Le Paradox spoke up from the blimp as he showed himself in the large window. He was dark-grey and white, with a large white handlebar mustache, and wearing a green jumpsuit. "Seft seemed to be of the opinion your amnesia would slow you down somewhat. It's a good thing I've never been one to take anything for granted. But you are...slightly ahead of my timetable. Let's see if you can get to me before it's too late, hmm? Tick-tock, tick-tock..."

Time Out: To Another Arabian Night

As Le Paradox's shock troops swarmed the platform, Murray reacted quickly. Grabbing one of the troops - who was less than half his size - he hefted the rat over his head before hurling him at the nearest defense laser, causing it to spark and wobble from the impact.

"Good thinking!" T-Bone called out as he grabbed one of the rats by their tail, spinning them around in a circle to clear space before sending them flying into the other laser. It, too, sparked and wobbled.

Sly, Coco, Bentley, and Razor immediately went to work keeping the attackers off the heavy hitters. Deik-Beck, meanwhile, raced off the edge of the platform and along the underside, seeking a faster route to the blimp in an attempt to spoke Le Paradox's plan of escape. His claws gleamed as he readied to tear the fabric of the balloon apart. After all, if it couldn't fly, it couldn't leave the dock, and if it couldn't leave the dock, it couldn't initiate time travel.

Just as the lasers shut down - and just as Deik-Beck got into range to attack the blimp - the vessel lifted up. "Ah, just a little too slow, so sad!" Le Paradox taunted playfully. "Too bad, so sad, but what can you do? Though I'd recommend you call off your little bot-friend. The circuitry of my Paradox Machine might well be built into the very structure of my zeppelin, tying the present to many past eras, and there is no telling what might happen if it were disrupted when not in the central anchor point of the present timeline, is there?"

Deik-Beck paused with claws bared, millimeters from the fabric of the balloon. He let out an angry hiss that was unlike any sound the others had heard him make before as he slowly withdrew.

"Now that's a clever bot," Le Paradox teased with a chuckle. "And now all the cards, zey are in my hand, no?" He looked up behind the group. "Bonjour, my large friend! What took you so long?" Sly and T-Bone turned to see what he was talking about while the others kept their eyes on the balloon. "Well, your group is more disciplined than anticipated..." Le Paradox observed to himself.

Behind the group stood Miss Decibel, holding an unconscious figure in one hand. "Hello, Cyrille!" she greeted Le Paradox warmly with a flirtatious wave. "I found this filthy old scoundrel unconscious outside." As she lifted the 'old scoundrel', it could be seen it was Salim.

"Salim!" Sly gasped in shock.

"But how?" Bentley demanded worriedly.

"Ah, now that is an interesting little tidbit," Le Paradox observed as he spun Salim's cane in his hands as the roof of the dock opened. "And since I want to buy time, I shall tell you. You see, everyone has a weakness..."

As Salim, Ca, Carmelita, and Penelope made their way back towards Ca's place of business, Le Paradox stepped out of the shadows, a much younger raccoon held at knife point by his thugs. "I believe I have something of yours, Salim al-Kupar," he observed idly.

"La-di!" Salim and Ca both gasped in fear.

The young raccoon lifted his head. "I'm sorry Father, Mother..." he murmured around a bruised chin, a missing tooth, and a black eye. "He...he had Bu-Bu. I...I had to save him..."

"And this is why I oh so love that heroes gather companions," Le Paradox observed idly. "So many pressure points...for the right kind of pressure." One of the thugs pressed the knife to La-di's throat more firmly. "Unless you want to see your son and heir bleed out before your very eyes, you will do exactly what I say Salim...and you will ensure that everyone else in your party does as well..."

"...and so now I have everything I need," Le Paradox observed happily as fists clenched. "I have the Cooper Canes I need for my Paradox Machine to be fully completed, I have the documentation of my 'noble lineage'..." Sweeping back with the cane, he pulled two bound figures forward, still in rather skimpy outfits. "And a couple of delightful guests aboard to ensure everyone stays on their best behavior..."

"Carmelita!" Sly called out in shock.

"Penelope!" Bentley screamed out in rage.

"Mommy!" Coco wailed.

Le Paradox chuckled darkly. "You know, I actually have the little mouse here to thank for my success," he observed in amusement. "I originally planned to aim for time periods where the Cooper ancestors were single, like with Rioichi Cooper...but how far she was willing to go to save Bentley showed me the better plan. Far better to strike when there are...pressure points to use to manipulate them. Of course, getting that specific required a bit of extra power for the machine...but an extra Cooper Cane and a few rare jewels out of pirate treasure more than took care of that."

"Let them go now, Le Paradox," Sly growled out angrily as he grasped his cane in his hands.

Le Paradox chuckled. "I am thinking not, Cooper. You see, I am but one step away from getting everysing I want. However, I do have, how you say, a proposition for you." He grinned maliciously. "As you can see, I have on board the two ladies of your party, dressed - how you say - less than comfortably? I also have aboard several of my own personal guards hired for muscle...much like those who guarded the dock, but with a bit more brains...and a bit less morals. Now, given that they are kept bound so they cannot defend themselves, I am certain I need not draw a picture of what would happen if I left it to those guards what to do with them, and I am certain none of us would be happy seeing that. And all it will take of you to ensure that does not happen...is to give me your Cane."

"Sly, don't do it!" Penelope screamed out as she chewed through her gag to get her voice out. "Your cane's the last piece he needs to complete the Paradox Machine! If he succeeds, he'll be able to stabilize the alterations to time-"

Le Paradox cut her off by jabbing her in the gut with the butt of Salim's cane before walloping her in the back of the head with the hook. "As you can plainly see, Cooper, I care not for their condition...but you do. What shall it be?"

Sly glared murderously up at Le Paradox for a time, then finally threw his cane up to him. "You're going to regret this," he growled as Le Paradox used Salim's cane to catch Sly's by the hooks.

"I am not thinking so," Le Paradox taunted as the blimp lifted up out of the dock. "I am thinking you will be quite stranded here once my machine is complete, and I will be happy with all I want. Au revoir!" With that, the blimp blazed with light and vanished.

"But Cyrille!" Miss Decibel called out as the blimp vanished. "What about...me...?" Her voice trailed off as she realized she was now at the center of a circle of very angry individuals who suddenly no longer had a reason to hold back at all. "Uh...it was just business?" she offered desperately.

I won't go into details on what happened with Miss Decibel. Needless to say, she wouldn't be getting out of jail anytime soon.

The more serious issue was that Le Paradox had all the cards. He had Mom, Aunt Penelope, the Cooper Canes, Dad's Cane, a near untouchable position he'd falsified for himself in the present, and a near completed Paradox Machine that would make his victory permanent. And all we had was a time travelling giant mech that could transform into vehicles...

...you know, suddenly the situation doesn't seem that hopeless.

Time Out: End of an Era

Our plan was simple, straightforward, and devastating. Uncle Bentley taught Uncles T-Bone and Razor how to control Operation Overlord from the Turbokat's controls while the mech was in jet mode. The two of them would fly attack and distraction against Le Paradox while the four of us infiltrated the blimp itself to rescue Mom and Aunt Penelope, and to neutralize the Paradox Machine. Uncle T-Bone and Uncle Razor were free to do whatever they felt would keep Le Paradox's attention on them so he couldn't focus on stopping us.

Getting in was easy. What came next...

As Sly, Coco, Bentley, and Murray entered the blimp, they found themselves in a completely dark chamber with only a single spot of light shining down on where Carmelita and Penelope were tied up...somehow back in their normal attire. "Well, the only way this could be anymore obvious is if there was a neon sign above their heads proclaiming 'This is a Trap'," Sly murmured darkly.

"Unfortunately, the darkness in here isn't natural," Bentley observed as he scanned. "It's literally an artificial void in reality created by the Paradox Machine. Short of actually stepping into the light, we can't actually do anything about the darkness."

"Is that strict reality, or just scientifically speaking?" Murray asked, gesturing to Coco.

"There isn't any magic out there either," Coco spoke up. "Nothing for the Mask or Staff to latch onto."

"Then at least one of us needs to trigger the trap," Sly decided as he started to walk forward.

Coco frowned. She did not like this idea of a plan, but Le Paradox presently held most of the cards. They needed to let him think he was in control, or they would be stuck. With luck, he wasn't aware of how many had infiltrated his facility-

The entire blimp shook, and the darkness vanished, revealing Le Paradox floating over Carmelita and Penelope in a clawed mech while holding a glass capsule sized to cover the platform they were on. "Those idiots!" Le Paradox snarled as he turned in another direction. "Do they have any idea the damage they could cause to the continuum by improperly shutting down a Paradox Machine?"

"I don't think they care," Coco observed as she focused a sphere of darkness from the Mask into the hook of the Staff before hurling it, shattering the capsule.

"Gyah!" Le Paradox snapped out as he jerked back with his machine. "Are you insane?"

"Yes," Sly, Bentley, Murray, Coco, Carmelita, and Penelope said all at once, Sly having taken the time Le Paradox was distracted to free Carmelita and Penelope.

"You idiots!" Le Paradox screamed as he rushed deeper into the facility with his mech.

At that moment, blazes of light appeared around the group, revealing Bob, Rioichi, Tennessee Kid, Henriette, Sir Galleth, and Salim. "The kitties said you could use some backup," Tennessee Kid offered. "Somethin' about losin' yer cane and yer mind?"

Sly grinned. "I think we could use some help, yeah."

With all the Cooper Ancestors with us, we knew we could make it through. Each cane was sealed in a part of the blimp that - oddly enough - was uniquely designed for that Ancestor to get through. When I pointed that out when Riochi was leaping to his first cane, Penelope had an explanation.

"By the time the Machine itself was being built into the blimp, I'd already stopped wanting to help Le Paradox, but couldn't do so openly. So I spread the canes out in the circuitry so that the chambers would be designed so each ancestor would be able to get to their own cane, in hopes you guys would be able to win even if it came this far."

Looks like the plan worked. Though each time a cane was claimed from the circuitry, alarms went off as Le Paradox' troops charged in to try and fight us. However, we were far too numerous for the amounts sent in. They went down easily each time, though each time a new cane was claimed after the first, one of the Ancestors was sent back through time. Penelope explained it was the energy of the Paradox Machine breaking down and losing connection to those eras, forcing us to move faster to keep it from damaging things further if Le Paradox tried to maintain the link improperly. This, apparently, was the 'proper shut down procedure' he'd been worried about previously.

It didn't take long for the six of us to get through to Le Paradox, with everyone else having been sent back to their own eras. This confrontation was going to be...interesting.

Le Paradox turned atop his mech, a strange metal circle braced against the far wall behind him. "Ah, Coopers...I should have guessed it would be harder than I-"

"That's the Time Tunnel," Penelope explained to Sly and the others, pointing to the metal circle. "Like the time machine, but the controls are on one end with no way to manipulate it from the other. A good way to get rid of people, by tossing them through time. A sideline of the Paradox Machine research."

Le Paradox glowered at her. "Oh, why not just tell them all my plan and goals in the least dramatic way possible, huh? Steal all my thunder!"

"He wants to erase the Cooper name from history as petty vengeance for his father getting locked up for a crime he intended to frame your father for," Penelope told Sly quickly. "Unfortunately for his father, your father stole the diamond before he got there."

"So did he design that mech himself, or was that you?" Sly asked Penelope.

"Me before I started working against him in whatever ways I could sneak past Seft, so I'm afraid it's pretty well designed," Penelope admitted.

"It won't do you any good to enrage me!" Le Paradox snarled out. "With the last Cooper Cane installed in the Time Tunnel, I can restore my alterations at any time at will once it is activated, and there is nothing you can do to stop me as the modern era is anchored firmly in the links to time itself!" Reaching over, he threw the switch. "Behold!" The Time Tunnel spun...and began to spark madly as the entire facility began to crumble. "WHAT?"

"You idiot!" Penelope screamed out. "You used the wrong cane!"

"But it is Sly's Cane-"

"You forgot about Coco, you dunderhead!"

Le Paradox glanced from the Time Tunnel to Sly to Coco, who clutched her Cooper Cane. "...merde..."

Everything went white.

Lost: Awakening

Coco slowly pushed herself to her hooves with a groan. She wasn't entirely certain what just happened. The last thing she remembered was Le Paradox cursing...

She gasped as memory flooded back. The feeling of time itself unraveling as her body and magic were pulled apart. The screams of her family. Her own scream. Something metal digging into her back-

"Beep!"

As the feeling of metal in her flesh withdrew, she recognized the feeling of Deik-Beck's tiny feet on her skin. "Wha...what happened?" she managed to ask.

"Unprotected time travel," Deik-Beck offered, his voice more controlled, more mature, than it normally was. "Not fun."

"Doesn't sound it..." Coco managed to groan. "...Mom? Dad? Everyone?"

"Six here," Deik-Beck confirmed. "Sly, Carmelita, Murray, Bentley, Penelope, you. None wake. I give you stimulant to wake up. Worried."

"So that's why I'm awake first," Coco mumbled as she shifted. She tried to open her eyes...only to realize they were already open, but she was still trapped in darkness. The heat on her coat, however, told her she was in bright sunlight. "...how come I can't see anything?" she asked as she did her best to control herself. The last thing she wanted was to upset Deik-Beck and have them both panicking. "Is it the stimulant?"

"No. Tumbling."

"Yeah, I probably didn't land out of time travel lightly," she grunted, doing her best to keep worry out of her voice. "So...I bumped my head bad landing then?"

"No. Eye mask turned around."

Coco blinked. Reaching a hoof up to her face, she patted over her eyes and found solid cloth instead of holes. "Oh, yeah...that'd do it." She chuckled nervously, letting her tension flow out of her as she slowly turned the mask around, squinting her eyes shut to protect them when the intense sunlight hit. As her eyes adjusted, she shifted her beret so she could shade her eyes enough to take in her surroundings. She'd already felt sand under her hooves, but...

Her eyes widened as she stared out across the endless sand. Sly, Carmelita, Murray, Bentley, and Penelope were all laid out near her, but it was what she saw in the distance that really caught her off guard. A massive pyramid stood beside a tiny oasis, casting its shadow across the desert as the sun crossed the sky. "I don't think we're in Paris anymore, Toto," she murmured dryly.

"Woof!" Deik-Beck agreed helpfully, attempting to ease the mood with some levity.

Coco giggled softly before sitting down to think things through. "Well, the pyramid and oasis says Egypt," she concluded thoughtfully. Pulling out her binocucom, she swept it around to search for signs of civilization. "...no signs of technology, so we definitely aren't in the present..." Putting the device away, she reached for the Staff of Moonlight...only to jerk her hoof back as the magic from it surged violently. "Yikes! And strong enough background magic that using my artifacts is a bad idea. That says we're pretty ancient. Wish I had some way of narrowing it down further..."

"Paradox Machine and Time Tunnel work based on Cooper Canes," Deik-Beck suggested. "Ancient Egypt Cooper Ancestor?"

Coco frowned thoughtfully. "Well, that would be either Slytunkhamen I, II, or III. I hope we're not at that time point, though, because that's when the Thievius Raccoonus was created. If something were to happen to prevent it being created...that could have serious repercussions..."

"Indeed it could," a hissing voice spoke from behind Coco.

Coco let out a scream as she spun...staring up into the eyes of the largest cobra she had ever seen. It made the snake that had lived in Mrs. Ruby's swamp base look tiny by comparison, with coils that stretched for perhaps a mile...though that might have been Coco's sudden fear making things seem bigger. Its scales were a bright mix of blue and green, and shone like emeralds and sapphires. Its eyes were bright gold like sun discs, and stared down at her and the entire group coldly from nearly twenty feet up, the spread hood ten feet wide...and yet the creature cast no shadow.

"Be not afraid, child of another world," the serpent hissed, her voice gentle and soothing. "I will bring no harm to you nor your family. It isss your family I have come to aid...and to beg a boon of. For one has come to thissss land that should not have, and he hasss wrought great wrong to land and time. If he issss not sssstopped, time itssself could unravel, and I cannot allow that to happen."

"Le Paradox?" Coco gasped in surprise. "But what harm could he have wrought? He can't have been here long-"

"That one will bring no harm to any now," the serpent hissed softly. "He ssssseeeksss one he thinkssss ally...but that one knowssss only betrayal, and isss one who brought sssssaid harm..." Her eyes flashed.

Le Paradox staggered out of the sun into the cavernous shade. "They will pay for this," he growled angrily. "Bah! No matter! This is but a setback! I just have to find my ancestor in this time. I memorized my family's history and the Coopers' while I was preparing. With that information I'll be more than able to create the empire I desire!"

"How interesting," a deep voice echoed from within the cavern. "It seems you haven't outgrown your need to monologue. I did tell you, you never know who might be listening."

Le Paradox jumped in fear, but quickly calmed himself. "Oh, there you are!" he said happily. "So nice to see an ally here. I wondered what happened to you when the Coopers had Penelope on their side. That gambit with Bentley was good, though. I'm certain you have something just as good in the now?"

"Oh yes, I have plans," the voice replied softly. "Plans already in motion. There's just one problem...though not for long."

"Well, I'm certain we'll be able to fix-" Le Paradox's voice cut off as a pincer closed around his head.

"The problem is..." the voice continued as a second pincer seized the skunk's kicking legs. "...I don't need you, and you plainly can't carry things out correctly...so you are in my way."

A wet rip. A hot splash. Two thumps.

Coco swallowed nervously as she found herself pulled out of what felt like a shared vision. "No..."

"Yesss," the serpent confirmed. "I will guide you assss I can...but it mussst be you and your family who sssstopsss him." She looked towards the oasis. "A cavern is hidden from ssssight. Lead your family there when they awaken, and I will anssswer quesssstionsss."

"Why do this?" Coco called out. "Why is this your concern? Why are we your concern."

"My name ansssswersss all thosssse quessstionsss if you have heard it," the serpent replied. "You would know me assss Wadjet."

Lost: Disaster

Coco waited worriedly and impatiently as her family slowly stirred. Sly and Carmelita were the first to awaken, and seeing Coco nearby resulted in the first action being a tight hug. It took Coco a few minutes to calm them down, and by then the others had awakened and everyone was staring around at their surroundings. The pyramid, the oasis, the desert...

"So...what now?" Bentley finally asked, standing on his own legs as the mechanisms of his wheelchair hadn't survived the transfer. He would have to salvage the components later. Penelope gently braced him to help him stay upright.

"There's a hidden cave by that oasis down there," Coco explained, gesturing. "Someone's waiting for us there."

"Who?" Murray asked curiously. "Who would know we were here or want to talk with us? I mean, pretty sure this is ancient Egypt, right?"

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you," Coco answered ruefully. "She told me, and I'm not sure I believe it."

"Who, Isis?" Penelope joked playfully.

"Given all I've seen of the Thievius Raccoonus and our trip through time, I honestly wouldn't be surprised if a God was getting involved," Carmelita pointed out with a smirk as she fanned her jacket to try and cool off. "It's about the only thing that would top everything we've been through."

"Wadjet, actually," Coco pointed out, feeling somewhat relieved.

Carmelita turned to stare at her in shock. "...I was being facetious..."

"Well if there's one thing I've learned from love, it's that you don't keep a goddess waiting," Sly told Carmelita playfully. "Let's go."

It didn't take the group long to make their way down to the oasis, and from there they could see the cave Coco had mentioned...somewhat. It only seemed somewhat there, like a mirage but far too close. "Are you...sure that's really a cave?" Bentley asked worriedly. As he spoke, the cave entrance seemed somehow to become less real.

"I'm pretty sure now that it's a place of divine origin," Sly spoke up, the cave starting to become more real. "It's only there for us if we genuinely believe it is there." Confidently, he stepped up to the cave entrance and vanished.

"Dad!" Coco called out worriedly, racing in after him.

As the group followed, they found themselves in a massive cavern, pleasantly cool as two wide rivers flowed through it, one upon the ground and one across the underside of the roof. The one upon the ground flowed straight and true through the cavern, slowly shrinking from a wide river to a shallow stream and beyond as it stretched out into the distance. The river on the underside of the roof was anything but placid, twisting and turning in on itself as eddies, rapids, and snarls caused it to endlessly divert and spill out of its banks, odd protrusions causing distressing blockages.

As everyone took this all in, Murray spoke up. "Is anyone else thirsty?" he asked, pulling a mug from somewhere and reaching towards where part of the river above arced along the wall near him.

"If you drink from that river, you will be dussssst in mere moments," Wadjet spoke calmly as she slithered down from the ceiling, the mass of her body filling a good portion of the cavern. "That issss the River of Time, and I am itssss tender...amongsssst other thingssss..."

As everyone stared in awe, Murray slowly lowered his mug. "So...what about the other one?" he asked curiously.

"That is the Divine River, birthplace of the Godssss," Wadjet explained softly. "I watch over it, and tend the Godssss that emerge from it until they are ready to asssssume their fated rolessss. If a mortal drinks from it, they will have great power for a few weeks and then die as their life force issss burned out." She glanced worriedly at a murky part of the River, then turned back to the group. "Have you told them what I showed you, Child of another World?"

"I wanted to get them to shelter first," Coco explained. "Dad and I are the only ones who have mastered the technique to regulate our body temperature relative to our environment, and none of the others are really built for this climate. I was worried about heatstroke."

"A good choice," Wadjet observed thoughtfully. "You will have time to adapt, though not much. Allow me to-" She paused, then reared up until she could touch the roof. Part of the River of Time frothed and spun, a whirlpool trying to breach its boundaries. Watching carefully, Wadjet lifted the tip of her tail and inserted it into the center of the whirlpool, twisting the other way until the torrent subsided. She then slowly lowered back to the group. "Forgive my rudenesssss-"

"Your duties have to come first," Sly agreed readily. "And I'm pretty sure a whirlpool in the River of Time is very bad for the space-time continuum."

"Untended, it would unravel time itssssself," Wadjet confirmed. "It takessss all my power to contain the dissstortion that hasss been brought to time, which isss why I cannot act against the one who hasss causssed it. The other Godssss are in ssssimilar sssituationsss, ssstruggling to maintain the balance of the world againsssst the workingsss of thisss one. When you fell uncontrolled through Time, I plucked you from the River as the only onessss who could lend aid in thissss time, before the eddiesss could erasssse you all."

"Is that why the Staff of Moonfire and the Mask of Dark Earth are unstable?" Coco asked worriedly.

"That...and the Sssstaff hasss not yet been desssstroyed in this time," Wadjet confirmed. "You will not be able to usssse them while in thissss time, Child of Another World." She turned to the group at large. "Cooperssss and alliessss...will you help resssstore what hasss been undone?"

"We will," Sly agreed readily as the others nodded their assent. "What's happened?"

"The one you call Ssssseft fell out of time and landed in the Divine River," Wadjet explained worriedly, glancing towards the murky portion again. "Mosssst mortalssss would have panicked, drank, and been little threat to Time. He did not panic. He remained within the River longer than mosssst could...letting it wash away his mortal impuritiessss as it flowed into an old wound. He hassss thusss become a Fell God, a divine that should not have exisssssted. And hissss firsssst act when he left the cave was to track down the grandfather of Slythunkamen I before he could have children and sssslay him."

Everyone gasped as they heard that. "But...but he's the one who started the Thievius Raccoonus!" Penelope gasped out. "If...if he was never born-"

"That issss the leasssst of our concernssss at the moment," Wadjet interrupted insistently. "If Seft continuessss, the chaossss he sssspreadssss will unleash Set upon the world. If that comessss to passss, Apep may awaken assss well. Then all issss lossst. The chaos Seft createssss must be contained and sssstopped." She turned to Sly. "When you firsssst met Sssseft, you were unhappy with yoursssself because you went assss an assassin, and not a thief. I must asssk you all to do ssso again. I mussst asssk you to kill a God."

Lost: Planning

Most of those listening were completely stunned at the enormity of the endeavor that was just asked of them, struggling to even conceptualize what they were now involved in, or caught in mental logic loops as they struggled to figure out how to approach it. Carmelita was not frozen thusly. "How much time do we have before the chaos he spreads wakes Set?" she asked carefully.

"That I do not know," Wadjet hissed out softly. "Hisss behavior sssince sssslaying the Cooper Ancessstor hasss been...erratic. He waitssss...and then sssstrikes without warning." She looked up at the River of Time, and then back down at the Divine River. "At bessst esssstimate...three weekssss."

"And how long until your ability to sustain us as rogue elements within the time stream fails?" Carmelita pressed carefully.

"If Ssssseft issss not sssstopped by then...two weekssss," Wadjet allowed apologetically. "At that point, my sssstrength will sssstart to fail, and I will be forced to choosssse between maintaining the River of Time or maintaining your pressssence."

"Then we'll have to plan fast," Sly spoke up calmly. "I'm assuming mortal weapons can't kill a god, even a Fell one?"

"That issss correct," Wadjet confirmed. "It musssst be made from sssspecial materialssss, and once crafted must be bathed in the Divine River, and bound with blood to the wielder. Even then there issss only one point on Sssseft's body that will be vulnerable."

"The old wound that let the water into his body," Coco deduced. "The one Dad put there with Mom's help."

Wadjet smiled down at the group. "Indeed...and it mussst be done by the onesss who wounded him for the energiessss to work properly."

"So you'll be giving us a list of materials we'll need to gather, general areas where they can be found, and then we'll have to figure out how to retrieve them without causing temporal disruptions of our own," Bentley deduced thoughtfully. "That means not being seen by anyone, not using any anachronistic technologies, and not leaving any trace behind...which means retrieving materials will be entirely up to Sly and Coco, with only a little help from us."

Wadjet's smile widened. "You adapt well. I am mosssst pleassssed. While ssssscouting to locate the materials will indeed need to be done by thosssse who have massstered sssstealth, othersss can sssstill help in retrieval if you are careful. Time isss ssssomewhat flexible in that regard."

"I can carry the heavy loads, once I know where to go!" Murray spoke up helpfully.

"I'll stay back here with Bentley and work on forging the weapons once we have the materials," Penelope offered quickly. "That's one thing we're both good at."

"I don't suppose there's anything in all this I can do until we've got those weapons?" Carmelita asked ruefully.

"You will need to determine what weapon of thissss time besssst ssssuitsss you," Wadjet observed carefully. "Then you musssst train in itssss usssse. Know, however, that ssssome weapon typesss accept the Divine Blesssssing to sssslay a god better than otherssss."

"In that case, I'd better train with a Nekhakha," Carmelita deduced, glancing over at Sly. "Pretty sure Sly's cane fits as a Heka, and they wouldn't be symbols of Divine Authority if they weren't naturally suited to Divine power."

"A wissse choice indeed," Wadjet confirmed as she produced the Eqyptian flail for Carmelita. "This one has magic within it, and will wield in a manner sssssimilar to how the Godslaying one will, though not exact. Practice until it isss sssecond nature, and you will be ready to face Sssseft. I will guide you assss I am able while you are here, and arrange for garb that will allow you to fight in thissss climate without weaknessss."

"And what materials do we need to gather?" Sly asked curiously, ready to make the list.

"There are four," Wadjet observed calmly. "Three are sssimple to come by, though disssstant. One, however, isss quite dangerousss, and you musssst be careful in retrieving it." She turned to the part of the River of Time Murray had tried to drink from and breathed on it, causing fog to take shape over the water before revealing an image. First was a silvery metal that glittered even when there was no light. "Firsssst isss Mithril, which will give the weapon the qualitiesss needed to absssorb the energiesss of the Divine River, and allow it to share them with you without burning up your life force. It can be found in the lake just outssside thissss cavern...but beware. The lake contains the energies of both Rivers within, and if you are not careful it could conssssume you."

"I get!" Deik-Beck offered helpfully. "Rust-proof metal body! No life force! No problem!"

Wadjet turned to the little robot and examined him carefully. "...indeed, you will be unaffected," Wadjet allowed, "and asss the lake is under my ssssupervisssion, you need not worry about dissssrupting hissstory." She then turned back to the fog and breathed again. The image faded, and then revealed an image of another metal, this one having the color of steel but seeming to support a mountain upon it, holding strength no earthly metal should possess. "Thissss issss Adamantine," Wadjet explained. "It will give the weapon the sssstrength to withssstand Sssseft's divine power. You will need to retrieve it from Greece, assss there issss none within our lands. Wadj-Wer will asssssissst you in reaching thossse landsss acrossss the Sssea that isss Hir dominion, but you will need to retrieve the metal yoursssself from the Young Godsss who dwell there, working to prepare the land for a new people. Diplomacy will be needed."

"I'll take care of that," Coco offered helpfully. "I'm better equipped for diplomacy than Dad anyway, not to mention a stronger connection to magical energy. That should smooth things over, right?"

"Possssibly," Wadjet allowed. "Sssstill, a good choice." She breathed again, and the image revealed was of a golden metal that seemed to float in midair. "While you are there, ssssee if you can find sssome Orichalcum. While not sssstrictly necessssary, it will help ssstabilize the mix of metalsss, asss well asss taking the weight the alloy will have off your own shouldersss."

"How careful do I need to be about technology while I'm over there?" Coco asked worriedly. "You mentioned the Young Gods are still preparing the land for a people. Does that mean there won't be a people there right now? Being able to program and use my Binocucom to scan for the metal's properties would help."

"Assss long asss the Young Godsss do not ssssee, it should be fine," Wadjet allowed nervously. "Do be careful." She then turned to Sly and Murray. "The two of you will need to work together to retrieve thissss lassst material...and you musssst not let Sssseft learn of itsss location!" She breathed on the fog, and revealed an image of a quartz-like material that seemed to pulse with inner light. "This is Naqahdah. It will allow the weaponsss to bond with you, and hold the energiesss of the Divine River ssso they may become Godssslaying weaponsss. Ssssly, you musssst locate the quarry which concealsss itssself, while Murray mussst retrieve it."

"Understood," Sly agreed nervously.

"We won't let you down!" Murray declared emphatically.

"I have faith in you," Wadjet avowed firmly.

Lost: Journey

As Coco set out to collect the Adamantine and Orichalcum, she quickly discovered just how different this adventure would be from every other her family had set out on. Quite a few differences had been expected, if they remained unpleasant. She knew that she would have to rush far more than she had to before, given the time limit they were working from was 'the end of the world'. She'd known she would be alone given how they had to divide the work to save time, much as she hated that part.

What she hadn't anticipated was the journey itself. Wadjet's directions to her had been to head straight north until she reached the Sea, where Wadj-Wer would meet her and transfer her across the sea. This left her with a direction that she only hoped she had right, as the distortion to time Seft had caused resulted in a strong magnetic pull from the Cavern Wadjet protected, rendering compasses useless. Not only that, the land had not yet been mapped, and without a satellite network to hook into there was no way to guide herself. On top of that, she had to hide her tracks to keep from being discovered, so she couldn't even use her path to guarantee she was going in the right direction...not that leaving her hoofprints would have helped long, as the wind erased them from the sand before she'd gone ten feet.

She was left with the choice of travelling by day and using the position of the sun to guesstimate North, or travelling by night and hoping she could recognize Polaris in a sky filled with unfamiliar stars...assuming it was the same star-filled sky each night, which wasn't always accurate given the eddies Wadjet had to frequently contain within the River of Time. All in all, the sun falcon she could see far overhead was a much more reliable guide, even if it did tax her energy and draw hostile animals to regulate her temperature in the heat of the day in the desert.

More than anything, she wished Deik-Beck could have come with her. Having someone to watch her back, or just talk to, would have made the journey so much more bearable. But alone, cut off from the strongest of her magic, afraid to tap the rest due to the instability Seft had caused, and never certain from one moment to the next if she was even going the right direction...

Well, I am trying to reach Tartarus, she thought idly to herself. Maybe we never actually made it out of the time warp and I'm already there? A maudlin thought, but on an unbelievable quest for impossible materials to try and kill the villain of her childhood nightmares who was now a god...she had to balance which was more believable. She wasn't exactly a saint, after all...

She was so lost in her thoughts, so desperate to make sure she was heading in the right direction, and so focused on keeping her temperature regulated to keep herself alive that it wasn't until she stuck her hoof in salt water that she realized she'd run out of ground. "Oh, okay," she murmured in surprise as she stepped back, letting her focus dissipate as she let the sea breeze cool her instead of trying to regulate it herself. "Now I just have to hope I was heading North and not South or West somehow, and this is the Mediterranean and not the Atlantic."

"The journey would have been much longer and far more perilous had you gone South or West," a voice echoed from the water as it began to froth. "The Dark Continent is filled with its own powerful magic, even without people or gods to tame it. Had you left the borders of our lands in those directions, you would have been devoured."

"That's very comforting," Coco offered sarcastically as she backed up from the froth, mentally going over what she knew of Wadj-Wer from history and myth. Okay, he's supposed to be a male god...but fully equipped in the female way to give birth and tend young as a god of fertility. The representation of the sea-

Her thoughts came to a halt as a bright green male seahorse the size of a dozen aircraft carriers lifted out of the waters, gazing down at her as only its head cleared the froth.

"...I really shouldn't be surprised," she murmured to herself. "This oddly enough makes perfect sense in hindsight."

"You do not startle easily," Wadj-Wer murmured, his voice echoing as though he spoke through water. "This is good. You have far to go and you must journey quickly." He lowered himself until his long muzzle touched the ground. "Climb upon me, young one. I shall take you to the lands of the Young Gods."

Nodding, Coco clambered up the slippery flesh, feeling the hard bony shape just underneath. She struggled to hold on as Wadj-Wer lifted his head as soon as her hooves left Egypt's soil. "It's going to be exciting if I have to struggle for a grip the whole way there," she managed to say as she tried desperately to anchor herself as Wadj-Wer turned around.

"We are there," Wadj-Wer stated as his head lowered, the tip of his muzzle touching the shores of Greece, a mountain that seemed to touch the very vaults of heaven visible in the near distance.

Coco's jaw dropped, her eyes wide. "But...how..." As realization struck her, she groaned. "Right, the entire Mediterranean Sea was said to be your body..."

An odd chirping sound echoed through Wadj-Wer's muzzle as Coco let herself slide to the ground. She soon realized the God was laughing at her. "Your stunned face is most amusing. While it is good you recover quickly, it is a pity I did not see more of it. Be careful with the Young Gods, young hero. They are young, impetuous, arrogant, and self-centered...with rare exception. It is our hope they'll grow out of it eventually."

"If the myths from my time are to be believed, they don't," Coco jibed dryly.

"That, or nothing mythical occurred after they did," Wadj-Wer observed with a sigh that blew leaves from nearby trees. "Allow me my optimism. I shall await your need to return." With that, Wadj-Wer disappeared back into the sea.

Coco smiled to herself. "Well, with luck that was the hard part-" she began as she turned away from the sea, her voice dying as she caught sight of what was approaching her.

While nowhere near as large as Wadjet had been, the massive Ohia Snake was still way too large for her comfort. It was easily a couple hundred feet long at least, and its mouth was more than big enough to swallow her in a single gulp. The serpent stayed close to the ground, its tongue questing for scent as its fangs - each one longer than her whole body - dripped silvery venom that burst into black smoke when it touched the ground. Its scales shone the bright silver of Mithril, the diamond pattern on its back from skull to tail tip obsidian so dark it seemed to absorb light. The brightness of color told Coco flat out she was dealing with another God Serpent.

She swallowed nervously. "I...d-don't suppose your name is Asmodeus?" she managed to stammer out through the fear she felt as she stared into those hypnotic orbs, only a lifetime of discipline in controlling her own magic and her experience with the enraged Dreamtime Spirits keeping herself from losing herself in that gaze.

The serpent slowly lifted itself up to look down at her, only lifting its head to treetop height. "Amusssssing," it hissed out thoughtfully, "but no. My name issss Hadessss..."

Coco swallowed convulsively. "...I'm dead..." she meeped out.

"Perhapsssssss..." The god's grin was not reassuring.

Lost: Gathering

Coco stared up at Hades, the Greek God of the Underworld, as he swayed gently back and forth, his body alternately seeming to give off light or suck it right out of the air. After her magic lessons with Mrs. Ruby and her experience with the Dreamtime, Coco had studied up on various mythos on the off chance they had more reality to them than the modern world believed...and on the off chance she'd encounter them. Of all the Greek Gods, she knew Hades was the most...reasonable of the lot. He made his rules and he played by them, he put his duty before his desires, he didn't screw around with mortals or sleep around with them, and if he gave his word he stuck by it. To her lights, if she was to encounter one of the Greek Gods, he was the best one to encounter.

Then again, he was also the God of the Afterlife, and when he did hold grudges he tended to wait until you were firmly in his domain before doing something about it, at which point you had all of eternity to regret crossing him...and he could be fiendishly creative when it came to said punishments. Not only that, of all the Gods he was one who had the least remorse when it came to his firm decisions. While he was the most fair and even-handed of the Greek Gods...it was with a cold-blooded practicality. He didn't get emotional when it came to his dealings with mortals...at least, not until after he wedded Persephone and his love for her led him to understand such things better. She was the one that brought out his mercy.

And this was a young Hades. He hadn't fallen for Persephone yet, hadn't wed her by whatever myth about that would prove accurate, and hadn't come to empathize with mortals yet. Not only that, Wadj-Wer's comment about the Young Gods 'growing out' of the attitudes they showed in the myths...suggested the possibility that a young Hades hadn't 'grown into' such an attitude, and might still be in the 'cruel, callous, self-centered' phase the other gods were stuck in for the entirety of their myths and legends.

"Issss thisss what passsesss for mannersss in the Birth Landssss now?" Hades asked coldly. "You have my name...but I lack yoursss..."

Coco swallowed nervously. Whatever happened, she dare not cross this god. "Forgive me, Lord Hades," she offered meekly. "I have heard of you before, and realizing I was actually in your presence...unseated my reason for a time. I am Coco Pommel Cooper-Fox-"

"Ahhh..." Hades interrupted, his eyes lighting up briefly in interest. "I wondered when your path and mine would crosssss. How fortuitousss that it isss sssso ssssoon. What bringsss you to our landssss, young one?"

Coco did her best to calm herself. Well, so far so good, she thought silently. He's interested. Clearing her throat, she spoke up. "I come at the behest of Wadjet, to retrieve Adamantine and Orichalcum Ore, in order to forge weapons to slay a Fell God. I..." She hesitated. What she would say next was greatly daring, and likely a little too far...but if she didn't say it, she might be too late from searching or get in trouble. "...I understand you might know of where I might find the first?"

"You are correct," Hades confirmed. "The Adamantine minessss are in my territory, under my direct control. The material issss required for the Gatessss."

Coco couldn't prevent herself from swallowing nervously again. This next part would be especially hazardous, for reasons completely unrelated to the prior questions. "Might I prevail upon you to part with some?" she asked hopefully.

"That dependsss..." Hades allowed thoughtfully. "What'ssss in it for me?"

Coco blinked in surprise. While she had expected that Hades would want some form of compensation or reparation for granting her access to his resources, she hadn't expected him to be so...blunt about it. "If...if Seft is not stopped, Set could awaken...and Apep could be unleashed. Wouldn't that...destroy this land as well?"

"Not my problem," Hades allowed. "The Gatesss will be completed well before then, which will make the Land of the Dead a sssseparate layer of exisssstence, one unaffected by the dessstruction of thissss world. I merely need sssslip in and watch the fireworkssss." He lowered his head to stoop over Coco. "And no, I don't care about the other Godssss here. My ssssiblingsss are all undergrown assssessss who think reality revolvesss around them. I couldn't give two shedssss about what happensss to them. And even if Apep is unleashed, Wadjet will sssurvive to guard the next River of Time and Divine River, to mother the next ssset of Godsss...and she'sss the only God of the Birth Landsss I know, let alone care about."

Coco felt herself pale under her coat, despite how pale her coat already made her appear. "I...I see..." she stammered out.

"But it mattersss to you if thissss world endsss..." Hades hissed out smugly. "And you need the Adamantine to prevent it. Sssso the quessstion becomesss...how far are you willing to go to get it? What issss the sssalvation of thisss world and your family worth to you?" His smile turned...lascivious.

Coco cleared her throat and swallowed. Dealing with Greek Gods, she had half expected something like this. She had hoped she would be able to avoid it, or find a way around it...but she'd already decided what she would say if she couldn't. "...Lord Hades...I offer you whatever you desire of me in exchange for what I need for my quest. But name it, and...if it is within my power, I shall give it freely."

Hades' smile widened. "I dessssire..."

The tip of his tail swung up and around, depositing a book in front of Coco. On the front cover was an image of Sly, his cane hooked around a power line above the dark Paris streets as he slid down it like a zip line, with Coco hooked onto a red band around his leg by her own cane.

"...your autograph."

Coco stared at the book, her eyes and jaw widening as she struggled to comprehend what just happened. She then looked from the book to Hades and back again, before looking back up at Hades. "Uh...?"

"I wassss a mossst obedient child while being reared by Wadjet," Hades explained softly. "Well behaved and curiousss...I asssked her about her dutiesss, about time...she looked through time for bedtime sssstoriesss for me. Yoursss was alwaysss my favorite. Such gentle compassion, fierce loyalty, ssstaunch moralsss...and hidden within, the dephtssss of cruelty. I will have to come up with punishmentsss for thossse whossse sssoulsss are weighed down by ssssin...and yoursss were fiendishly clever. Given Clock-La her dream, only for it to be an eternal nightmare...dropping Contessssa to the Golemsss where she thought she would die brutally...only to leave her trapped in their grassssp asss she did not know if or when they would begin the torment, ssso that she welcomesss imprisssonment by mere mortalsss once freed..." He let out a hiss of excitement. "Insssspiring...mortals are ssso much more...creative than Godssss..."

Coco continued to stare up at him as she flipped the book open. "You...you made me think...you let me think...you wanted..."

Hades' grin widened even further. "Asss you sssaid in Parisss...it isss important to know thessse thingsss about ourssselvesss...about how far one will go in the right circumssstancesss..."

"You..." Coco struggled against what she was about to say for fear of giving offense, even as she signed the book. "You utter troll!"

"Deliberately misssrepresssenting myssself to force unexpected and entertaining reactionsss from othersss that reveal more of them than I?" Hades asked teasingly. "Quite a fun way of being, I should ssssay. I am csssertain one of my manifessstationsss will fully embrace that." As he turned, for a brief moment a different Hades was superimposed onto him, a human-shaped one filled with dark purples, bright greens, and a cape that flowed like blood or miasma. Then the serpent was back. "Come...I have both Adamantine and Orichalcum sssstoresss. I shall even give you a little extra of each, as a treat for your little robot friend since he likes eating unique metalssss."

Breathing a sigh of relief and shaking her head in bemused exasperation, Coco followed Hades into the woods towards his domain. She knew now she was safe with him...physically, anyway. No telling what mental state she'd be in if he kept this up, though.

Lost: Distraction

Despite Sly's best efforts, he was unable to get any information out of Crazy Hassan about the 'Equestria' he had mentioned. Each time Sly had asked, Crazy Hassan had instead redirected the conversation back to business. Even trying to make the information part of the business deal hadn't worked. Sly sighed as he remembered how that conversation had gone.

"How much would you charge for that information?" Sly asked desperately.

"Crazy Hassan does not deal in information!" Crazy Hassan insisted firmly. "Only camels!"

"You were going to throw a map of the clouds into a deal for Sky Camels," Sly countered hopefully.

"Those were Sky Camels," Crazy Hassan allowed obliquely. "If you were interested in ocean camels, I would throw in a tide map. If you were interested in Diving camels, I would throw in a map of ocean trenches."

"Well-"

"And as I said, I do not deal in Equestrian Camels, so what would our deal have to do with Equestria? So I have no information for you, so sorry-"

"What if I bought some used Dimension Camels that could walk between realities?" Sly asked, grasping at straws. "Would you throw in a map of the void with directions marked down to Coco's home dimension to seal the deal?"

Crazy Hassan tapped his chin thoughtfully. "No, Dimension Camels are for walking in and out of stories, so one can go from two dimensions to three and back again. Sold the last of those to a pair of plumbers in red who wanted to visit each other. Never thought about selling Void Camels, though..." He glanced towards the sky, then nodded to himself. "I shall look into acquiring some, and if I do I shall sell them to you at special price, and even throw in a guidance system to take you to Equestria if that's where you want to go. But for now, you were interested in the dwarf camels? I'll even throw in some hardened containers so the Naqahdah does not explode if you drop it on the way back! No charge!"

Sly had let it go at that point, though determined to return to the conversation later. Instead he'd tried to negotiate to rent the Dwarf Camels as he had no place to keep them and no way to feed them. Crazy Hassan had instead thrown in 'pocket sized Camel Carry Capsules', which he promised contained everything a single camel needed in terms of paddock, grazing, water source, and droppings grounds, completely contained and could fit in the palm of one hand or carried in the pocket, along with some local garb since he'd been buying Anachronist Camels. Sly took out one of those Capsules. ...they looked like nothing so much as a pair of fezes - one red and one white - stuck together at the open ends with a button on it. The design seemed familiar.

As of now, he and Murray were following along behind the Dwarf Camels as they tunneled expertly beneath the sand, propping up the tunnel so that it remained intact despite the almost liquid nature of sand in a desert. Glancing back, he saw a clear path straight to the oasis. Glancing forward, he saw the Dwarf Camels digging away in professional silence. Glancing to either side, he spotted odd runes drawn on the walls of the tunnel, everything from a simple circle with a horizontal line through it to more complex. It felt like they had meaning, but he had no understanding of it.

After a while, there was a light past the Dwarf Camels, and they led the way out into the canyon where the Naqahdah could be mined. Sly and Murray shaded their eyes against the sun as they took the place in. It was wide open, with no place to hide or sneak, and the shape of the walls seemed to echo and rebound every single sound.

Such as the sound of a scorpion sting grinding against the wall of a twisting passage off to one side of the canyon.

Seft! Sly thought intensely, bracing himself. They weren't ready for combat, but Wadjet had made it plain they could not allow Seft to get a hold of any of the Naqahdah. If that meant challenging him when they weren't ready, so be it.

Murray quickly gestured to Sly to get his attention. He pointed to himself, to the camels, and then to where one wall of the canyon glowed with the mineral deposit they were after. He then gestured from Sly to the twisting passage in question.

Sly nodded as he swiftly donned the 'local garb' Crazy Hassan had provided him. It felt a little awkward at first despite fitting him like a glove...at which point he realized this was the first time since - well, since the first clash with Seft - that Sly had used a costume that Coco hadn't made for him. It felt...less personal wearing it. Still, it made him look exactly like his contemporary ancestor - specifically, the one Seft had murdered - so between that and the pair of shorter Canes it came with, he should be able to prove a distraction to Seft without him realizing that the actual Cooper Gang was present. The last thing they needed was him being prepared to fight them.

As Murray went with the Dwarf Camels to start mining, Sly quickly and silently raced down the twisting corridor, taking every opportunity to hide and listen, doing his best to make sure he could catch Seft unawares, rather than Seft catching him unawares. However, just as he felt he was getting close, he heard a voice whispering, the whisper echoing enough that it seemed to beat down on him where he hid.

"While the chaos I've caused blinds my new senses to this area to the point only my physical senses show me the topography, there is one thing those senses will still show me," Seft hissed out, his voice more powerful than it had been before, with harmonics that seemed to shoot straight to the hindbrain in an attempt to force one to go to bended knee. "I am a god now, and I thirst for conflict, one who I can truly test myself against. I have named...a nemesis. And when that nemesis comes close..." Seft chuckled darkly. "Well, I know where you are, Sly Cooper. Your ancestor...I thought he would prove a challenge, but he is gone. Dressing up as him will not fool me. I am sure you are carefully gathering what you think will defeat me, and I am certain someone is guiding you. I am just as certain...that it will all be for naught. But this is not my chosen battleground.

"Now that I know you are here and now...bring me your best, for you will get no more chances."

Almost immediately, the sense of oppression vanished...and yet it was not until ten minutes later that Sly found his breath.

Lost: Monologue

Deik-Beck swam down into the lake as directed, questing the Mithril hidden deep in its depths. His sensors showed him the energies infusing the entire lake, those of divinity and the essence of time. He could see why any living being who entered the lake would be reduced to dust if they tried, and that was the best possible fate. His mechanical body, however, was already treated with energies that made it indestructible. After all, Clockwerk built Deik-Beck after Coco had rendered Clock-La immortal by taking from that fused being the Seed of Death that made living beings mortal, that allowed them to leave the living world when their bodies gave out.

Deik-Beck looked back on those memories, the ones that weren't his. Neyla's screams of pain and fear as she sank towards the depths, only for her to realize - as the body she was in moved without her directive - that she was not alone.

"W-what's going on?" she demanded in fear. "Why is my body-"

"It was never your body to begin with," Clockwerk responded cruelly. "You were simply borrowing it. And I must thank you. If not for you, I would have remained a lifeless husk of my former self. Because of you, I was called back, my soul awoken. But I have no more need for you."

"Wait!" she called out despairingly. "I can help you-"

"All you are - all you ever were - is dead weight. And it's time to shed that."

With a jerk, half the Clockwerk head broke off the rest, letting Clock-La sink into the trench. An extra twist of cruelty, and part of the trench broke away with a strike, tumbling enough dense rocks down atop Clock-La to hide the metallic signature from any deep scans. Someone would have to know exactly where to look - and what to look for - to find her now...and the change in momentum from breaking off meant even calculating exactly from the point of entry into the ocean and all forces involved would get the wrong location. She now sank into a completely different branch of the trench.

Clockwerk himself altered the shape of the chunk he'd broken off, grasping the wall of a trench in an animal form that could make the climb back to the surface. Once there...he would get close to the Coopers. The filly...she was despondent after what happened to the turtle. He would just need something...cute to get her attention. Cute, helpless, damaged...just like her.

And as he broached the surface, the red optics turned blue. Deik-Beck was crafted, with a story to win sympathy.

An odd set of memories to be looking at, Clockwerk observed idly to the other voice in his metallic head, a voice he once thought naught but a tool.

End coming, Deik-Beck answered simply. When end comes, only natural to look at beginning.

...you know my plans.

We share head. Hard not to.

As the two in one being used their hind legs as propellers to drive deeper into the waters, they sat in silence for a time. Eventually, it was Clockwerk who spoke up. They will probably never forgive the deception, if my plan works. Coco will likely never forgive being used.

This I know.

Silence reigned for a longer time. ...I expected you to be more upset about that.

If save Coco, I do anything.

Even...make her hate you?

...do you remember love now?

Clockwerk was silent for a time. He looked back in his memory - as long as it was - and sought out a recollection that wasn't about hate. Wasn't about revenge against the Coopers. Wasn't...

...a little owlet named Klaw. An older raccoon. His daughter. A mission. A desire. A promise. ...a fool.

Did I go too far?

Love makes fools of all.

Clockwerk was silent for a time. Is that where you come from? Is that why your presence is so strong in my mind? Is that why you're able to influence my thoughts to the extent you've become a part of me, something truer than I was? Are you...young Klaw?

Not Klaw, Deik-Beck! Deik-Beck corrected insistently. After a time of silence, he added, Echo, perhaps.

Clockwerk let that turn over in his mind as they descended further...until they found the vein of Mithril. The ore glittered with silverly light, one very similar to the color of Clockwerk's metal wings. Carving off a tiny piece, Deik-Beck devoured it, letting it and its energies infuse his body. I am...sorry.

Sorry?

For treating you like nothing more than a tool. For taking what you had to offer me for granted. For disregarding what you could have been. And now...for destroying your future. I am...sorry.

Sorry for revenge?

Clockwerk thought about that for a time as Deik-Beck got to work carving out enough Mithril to make the weapons for Sly and Carmelita. As they turned to seek the surface, he found an answer. No, I'm not sorry for the quest that began in hatred, or what I did as a result of it. Or, to be more accurate, I do not regret my actions, or the results of them...though I repent the pain it caused.

Time to grow, Deik-Beck offered happily. Time to change. Time to love. Time to forget.

If we fail, there won't be any time left.

If succeed, all time in world to fix. Deik-Beck let off a few happy beeps, his version of a happy giggle. Cooper ancestor missing. Replacement has to come from somewhere. Grandfather of Book author dead...so supply replacement father of author.

Clockwerk thought about that for a time and couldn't help but chuckle. Those two stuck here in a place where they can get plenty of privacy, can't interact with many others, and waiting until the timestream is stable again before they can be sent anywhere? There might be plenty of choice by the time Wadjet drops that bit of news on them!

Clockwerk and Deik-Beck shared a laugh...and Clockwerk began to understand more than he did about what love meant.

Lost: Preparations

Carmelita trained studiously with her Nekhaka, working with it until it became second nature for her to wield. The physical aspect of using the flail had come easily. The hard part had been learning to tap the magic within it, how it shaped, what it could do, and how to control it. One aspect she'd mastered quickly had been projecting a sphere of magical energy that could impact with stunning force, much like she had with her shock pistol. Getting that to go where she wanted took practice, since the angle it flew at seemed to depend on the speed the flail's lashes were spinning at, the direction of the spin, where she was holding it, and whether she released it on an over or underhand swing. While it provided a great many ways to use the magic, it was a difficult system to master.

Other ways the magic could be used included, but was not limited to: a hurled lightning bolt; a blinding flash of light; an energy bola; a web-like net; and creating a miniature tornado. Carmelita had yet to figure out how to deliberately shape most of those, and had focused on just the shock blast. She hoped to have at least that mastered by the time the weapons were made, and they were ready to take on Seft. If nothing else, she'd be at a level equivalent to the weapons she was used to.

Still, she thought to herself as she spun the lashes tight together with a twirl of her wrist, treating it like a ribbon in rhythmic gymnastics, I miss the shock blade Bentley added to my pistol. It's not like I can just- She flicked her wrist with the wound lashes.

Energy wrapped around the lashes, binding them together as the resulting energy blade sheared through a nearby rock, causing it to slowly fall to pieces.

Carmelita stared at the weapon as the lashes unraveled from each other to go limp again. "...it's thought directed, isn't it?" she asked with a groan.

"But of coursssse," Wadjet told her. "It'ssss magic. Where did you expect it to get itsssss input? Buttonssss on a controller?"

"So the hard part is learning what thoughts shape the weapon," Carmelita concluded as she twirled the lashes a few times. "At least I have something to go on now. I was worried I'd have to learn to speak Ancient Egyptian for voice commands."

"The completed weaponssss will need that if wielded by ssssomeone other than you or Sssssly," Wadjet observed thoughtfully. "But we can think of that if you win."

Carmelita sighed as she flipped the weapon up to grasp the lashes and handle at once. "I just can't believe it took me so long to realize something so simple," she grumbled irritably. "What...six hours? Eight?"

"Two days," Bentley piped up from where he and Penelope were hard at work constructing a forge.

"Seriously?" Carmelita gasped in shock. "But...but why aren't Sly, Murray, and Coco back?"

"Egypt to Greece isn't a one-day trip off a plane in our time," Penelope pointed out dryly. "I'm sure they'll be back soon-"

"We're back!" Murray declared boisterously at the head of a group of dwarf camels, loaded down with Naqahdah. Sly followed him in, a worried expression on his face that he quickly hid as he smiled at Carmelita. "We got the Nakky...the Naku...the magic glowy quartz!"

"And we had a close encounter with Seft," Sly added nervously. "I don't know if he knew what we were there for...but he plans to confront us directly. One last showdown with everything we can bring to bear..."

"I should have asked if Hades could lend a hand, then," Coco observed as she walked in with two large sacks, barely managing to pull them both along. "Then again, he didn't have any..."

"Are you alright, Coco?" Carmelita asked worriedly, rushing to her side to check her over.

"I'm fine Mom," Coco hastened to reassure her as she wound up getting checked over - and hugged - by Sly as well. "A little dehydrated at best, but otherwise just fine. Besides...I get to sit this fight out, don't I? The only ones who can hurt Seft now that he's like this is you two with these special weapons."

"She issss correct," Wadjet confirmed. "I will be keeping the ressst of you cloaked within the cave when Sssseft arrives to do battle. You will be able to watch...but to participate would only put you in needlesssss danger. For now, it isss time to forge the weaponssss." She slowly slithered over to where Penelope and Bentley were working on the forge. "Issss all in readinessss?"

"Yup!" Bentley confirmed, gingerly walking over to the largest part of the construction, made from a cauldron with a hole in the bottom hooked to pipes. "This is the Naqahdah refinery. Actually using that material involves reducing a lot of the ore to create a small amount of the material actually used in the weapon to have the right energy properties...so it will all have to go in here. We can't get the seams quite right, so we can expect some spillage of the concentrated material-"

"On clean up!" Deik-Beck chimed in happily as he returned with the Mithril.

"The Orichalcum goes in here," Penelope continued, gesturing to a large beaker hooked to a series of twirling glass tubes. "The alchemic aeration will allow it to mix properly with the other metals. The Mithril is added here." She gestured to a series of metallic IV drips hooked to the long pipe that the Naqahdah and Orichalcum would feed into. "It will slip into the holes left by the aerated Orichalcum, binding the materials together."

"It will then all be pumped through the Adamantine," Bentley concluded, gesturing to the last crucible. "As an ore, Adamantine is malleable...but once it has been heated, cooled, and shaped...no power known to the Gods of this world can reshape it. That will make the resulting alloy all but unbreakable as far as Seft is concerned...unless he's got more resources we don't know about."

"Then we need to be prepared to counter that if he does," Coco observed worriedly as she gave bits of Orichalcum and Adamantine ore to Deik-Beck as treats as he groomed her mane.

"And that brings us to the last stage," Bentley explained as he gestured to the molds below the Adamantie vat. "Once the alloy's poured in, the two of you will each put a drop of your blood into your respective weapon. This will infuse it with your essence, binding it to you...which will also extend its protections to you. With luck, it will let you fight Seft on an equal footing for as long as your stamina and the power of the weapons last."

"Then it issss time to begin..." Wadjet hissed out, watching as the ores were placed in their proper crucibles.

Lost: Forged

The weapons were finally complete. After the ores had been fused and the metals shaped, Sly and Carmelita had each put a few drops of their own blood into the weapons to bind them to their intended wielders. After that, they had been doused in the Divine River to give them the power to slay a Fell God. At Sly's suggestion, Wadjet had held the cane in the River by her tail through the shaped hook, so that between the weight of the weapon and the movement of the river it would constantly be in motion without ever running the risk of washing downstream, thus ensuring it never encountered the usual weakness that happened when someone or thing was blessed by being held under a sacred river by having the 'grip' not completely submerged. This wasn't an issue with Carmelita's flail, as the lashes were bound to the handle by magic rather than metal or cord, and thus did not need the indestructible aspect Sly's weapon needed.

The completed weapons glimmered even in the cave, the light of the Rivers reflecting off the metal as it glowed in gold, blue, and silver. Carmelita held hers lightly in her grip, marveling at how it responded to her slightest thought as she waved it about, the lashes almost seeming to have minds of their own as they responded to the slightest mental directive. Sly looked at his new cane unhappily, his eyes focusing on the one aspect it had that his old one had deliberately lacked: the razor sharp points on the hook.

"The purpossse of thessse weaponsss isss to kill," Wadjet gently reminded him as he continued to stare.

"Recognizing the necessity doesn't mean I like it," Sly pointed out in an oddly neutral voice. "Seft needs to be stopped. We're the only ones who can. The only way to stop him now is to kill him. That means we have to kill him. I recognize and accept that, and will do it." He rolled the cane gently in his hands before flipping it around a few times to test its weight. "Doesn't mean I like it, anymore than I did when I set out to kill Seft when I learned it was the only way to protect Coco from being used as a power source back when we first encountered him."

"You know, something's been bothering me," Murray spoke up thoughtfully. "About...that whole thing."

"Oh?" Wasjet asked curiously.

"Well, I was looking at those old papers from that job of Bentley's," Murray continued, "and...well, if I read the figures right, due to the difficulty of bootstrapping the breach, the first 'anchor' - the thing taken from the other world to energize this end of the portal with that world's energies - would have to have a relatively low energy quotient. At first I thought that meant 'has to be a kid', but that didn't seem right. There were a lot of numbers..."

"Actually," Bentley corrected, "from what I was able to determine reading it, it would have to grab someone who had energy of that world, but at levels that could blend with the energies of our world by comparison."

"So...as magically potent as I've grown up to be..." Coco began awkwardly as she turned this over in her mind. "For the portal to have snatched me for a power source...I have to be one of the weaker ones of my world?"

"Err...more or less," Bentley admitted.

"If that's 'one of the weaklings'," Penelope demanded in shock, "then what the hell do the 'powerhouses' look like?"

"And how was Seft planning to take them out to conquer?" Murray inquired curiously.

Wadjet turned into the River of Time thoughtfully. "...by forcing them to fight hisss way," she explained softly as she looked through time. "Hosssstagessss. Psssychological warfare. Ressssource harvessssting. Ssslash and burn tacticsss. Forcing the more powerful of the beingsss on that ssside to pursssue him to this ssside after resssearching the energy enough to know how to turn it againssst them. Had you not liberated Coco from him...he had a 73% chance of ssssuccesss basssed on the energy configurationsss of that world at that time."

"Then it's a good thing we did liberate her," Sly stated warmly, bending down to muss Coco's mane. "And all the more important that we take him down now...before he decides to try again with god power."

"Indeed," Wadjet agreed. "Come. I have raimentssss for you that will protect you ssssomewhat from hisss divine power, and enable you to meet him on a ssssomewhat even footing." Turning, she picked up a package before setting it before Sly and Carmelita.

Sly carefully opened the package. Golden bracers for their wrists and ankles. White silk wraps to hang below the waist. Golden sun-shaped peytrals to hang from their shoulders over the upper part of their chests and back. Two headdresses, one identical to that worn by the pharaohs, the other with a stylized throne designed atop it.

"Do not wear other garb with thessse," Wadjet warned carefully. "The energy fieldsss embedded in the material will fail if other fabrics are interlaid with these...and then you will be vulnerable-"

"So where's the rest of it?" Carmelita asked worriedly as she held hers up against her body, as she realized that the completed outfit would be...quite revealing on her.

"...that issss the entire raiment," Wadjet pointed out thoughtfully.

"What?" Carmelita demanded in shock. "But...but I'll practically be falling out of it every time I move!" She held the sun peytral up to her body to show that it would almost, but not quite, cover her ample bosom. "And this silk is so thin...it's practically see through!"

"That issss why you mussst wrap multiple layerssss," Wadjet explained calmly. "I shall show you-"

"If I wrap it that much, it'll barely cover anything anywhere else!" Carmelita complained. "How am I supposed to fight like this?"

"The...same way you fought in the belly dancer outfit in Salim's time?" Bentley offered helpfully.

"So not very well, then?" Penelope joked impishly.

"...to be fair, I'm pretty sure I showed off less in that outfit," Carmelita pointed out dryly, though she took another look at the raiment as she mentally prepared herself for...more than one sort of battle.

"If it helps, think about how much of Dad will be shown off!" Coco offered a trifle impishly.

"That does not help!" Carmelita growled out as she struggled to control her blush.

Lost: Loathed

With weapons in hand and garb barely covering their bodies, Sly and Carmelita made their way out into the desert where Wadjet told them Seft would seek them out. To Carmelita's surprise, despite how skimpy her outfit was and how little it covered, her body behaved as though it gave full support and covering...unless she gave thought to it, in which case her body acted like how it looked. As such, she did her best not to think about it...and not give in to the temptation to find out if Sly's outfit had a similar enchantment on it.

They weren't in the desert long before the skittering of chitin on sand informed them that Seft approached. Before he became visible, his voice reached them. "And so you come upon me to kill me," he spake calmly. "Tell me, Master Thief, Inspector...how does it feel to be nothing but assassins now?"

Sly tensed up, but Carmelita merely flexed her flail. "Honestly, no different than when I'm given the order to take someone down dead or alive," she answered easily. "I always knew that if I ever found you again, I would choose 'dead'. Besides, assassins hide and strike. We're hardly doing that if you know exactly where to find us, and vice versa."

Seft chuckled grimly. "Indeed," he murmured darkly. "But then again, it's impossible to hide from destiny...and it is now destiny that we do battle." He slowly cleared a dune.

Sly and Carmelita found themselves staring up...and up...and up. The divine power inside him had expanded Seft into immensity, so that he now towered over them in the same way Wadjet had. With his legs at full extension, his head was nearly fifty feet in the air, and his torso massive. Small blessings, the tiny wound they had inflicted on first meeting was a proportionally bigger target, but it would also take a lot more punishment before they would be able to deliver a finishing blow. A badly healed scab covered it, showing what they would have to get through to get to it. His arms swept out as his pincers clicked in the air...all six of them echoing into their very bones as they saw the wicked curves and even blood channels, as though they had been forged rather than being part of a living body. His sting arced over his shoulders, blotting out the sun as it was carefully positioned.

"Let us see if you have what it takes to kill a god..." Seft growled, then lashed out with his sting.

Carmelita dove to the side, bringing her flail up to lash out with bursts of light aimed at his face, meant to distract and blind. Sly leapt back just out of range of the sting, then leapt forward to grasp the back of it before racing up it as fast as he could. When the light reached Seft's face, he shielded his eyes with one pincer and staggered back, his tail jerking backward. At just the right moment, Sly leapt from the tail towards Seft's torso, swinging his cane down at the scab. His hook barely caught it, jerking part of it free...though not enough to expose the wound before Seft smacked him away with the back of one pincer.

"Not bad, Cooper," Seft growled out as he turned towards him. "But you need to do better than-GAH!" He struck out at his chest, managing to catch Carmelita as her invisibility dropped. She'd managed to learn that Cooper technique enough to conceal herself to get in range to strike the scab with a lash from below, breaking off another chunk. "So you think that's enough to take me?" Seft roared out as he skittered forward, attempting to slash with one pincer while another swept in to close firmly.

As Carmelita desperately dodged out of the way, Sly leapt onto one of the legs and climbed up rapidly. Before he'd made it to the top, one of the pincers was coming his way...and he caught it with his hook and jerked, causing it to close on Seft's own leg. As Seft bellowed in shock and pain, he jerked back...but Sly had pulled it into the rear-most leg, and the jerk knocked Seft off all the legs on that side, causing him to fall over. As he struggled back to his feet, Sly and Carmelita lunged back in, striking at the scab with all their strength until finally the wound was exposed.

However, their single minded assault proved to their detriment, as two of Seft's arms lashed out. Sly's instincts warned him just in time to backflip out of the way before he was seized in those pincers...but Carmelita didn't react quite fast enough. She let out a scream of pain as the pincer closed around her, starting to crush her body.

"I won't insult you by trying to make you back off to save her," Seft growled as he held Carmelita high in the air as he got back upright. "We all know what happens if you lose here."

"And you want that?" Sly snapped out as he searched around for a way to get to the wound.

"Do you have any idea how much power I will have as the god that caused the end of this world, with so much of the future that needed to already happen collapsed from my actions?" Seft roared out. "I will be able to open the breach between worlds under my own power! I can cross over and conquer...and Apep will bless me for bringing him out so soon! With the blessing of chaos, nothing in any world will be able to touch me! I will be able to conquer endlessly...and the only thing that stands in my way is the two of you!" He squeezed Carmelita in his pincer, and she let out a cry of pain, the protections on her raiment the only thing keeping her from being split into pieces.

"Not quite," a cold, familiar voice declared angrily.

Seft, Sly, and Carmelita turned to stare in shock towards the source of the voice as wings spread, blotting out the sun.

Lost: Loved

Coco, Bentley, Penelope, and Murray watched from inside the Sacred Cavern where the weapons had been forged. Wadjet was struggling to maintain the River of Time, but she was able to divert a small amount of her power to let the group watch the battle as it unfolded...even if she was only able to give an aerial view on the section of the River of Time that was on the roof of the cavern. It was a little disorienting at first, but the group had found the easiest way to handle it was to lay down on their backs and stare up at it, treating it like a movie. However, as they watched, one thing became clear.

Sly and Carmelita were outmatched.

"The only thing they've got going for them is Seft hasn't figured out how to fight such small opponents effectively yet," Bentley pointed out worriedly. "He'll figure it out before too long...probably long before they manage to break off that scab so they can actually hurt him."

"Assuming he doesn't just dedicate two claws to covering the wound once it's opened," Penelope muttered worriedly. "He does have six. Easy enough to spare two for defense when he's only fighting the two of them."

"Isn't there any way we can help them?" Murray pleaded worriedly. "Can't we go out and attack...as a distraction, if nothing else? We...we could throw big rocks, or get ropes around his limbs!"

"Pretty sure his divine power would make him immune," Coco pointed out sadly. "The rocks would just bounce off, and he could probably pull us all right off the ground with one limb...and there's no way we could anchor any machine we could come up with...and if we can't contribute, we're just in the way."

"Get Godslayer camels from that Crazy Hassan guy?" Murray asked desperately.

"He already left," Penelope pointed out. "Said something about Void Camels and satisfied customers and just...vanished, tent, stock, and all."

"Well can't we get weapons or something?" Murray demanded angrily. "I can't stand just sitting here!"

"That why lying down!" Deik-Beck offered humorously, startling a few chuckles.

"Without a weapon forged of the four metals, we couldn't even faze him," Coco pointed out sadly. "We just...have to watch and hope Mom and Dad are good enough..."

As the group watched in silence, they saw Seft go down...only to climb back up and seize Carmelita.

"Mom!" Coco gasped out in fear as the image - and the River of Time - wavered.

"Thissss isss bad..." Wadjet hissed out as she struggled to maintain the River, and keep it from overflowing its banks.

"We have to do more than just sit here!" Bentley snapped out. "Isn't there any of that metal left? An arrowhead would be enough!"

"Just the fragments I...fed to Deik-Beck..." Coco spoke up thoughtfully.

"Is that enough metal to make him a weapon?" Penelope asked hopefully.

"But even if it was, what could he do?" Murray asked thoughtfully.

"Not much," Diek-Beck allowed softly. His optics blinked, and glowed red. "But I can do more," he said in a very different voice, one almost familiar.

Everyone spun towards him in shock. "D...Diek-Beck?" Coco gasped out, afraid.

The optics blinked to normal. "I love you," he said in his normal voice. The optics blinked to red. "I'm sorry." Diek-Beck raced over to the Divine River, then turned back...one optic normal, one red. "Goodbye," the two voices said together...before he threw himself into the Divine River.

"Diek-Beck!" Coco called out despairingly...only to watch in awe as the Divine River blazed with sacred light that was almost blinding. As everyone turned and shielded their eyes, a metal figure erupted out of the light to plunge into the vision of the battle.

The vision wavered briefly as the River of Time stilled. Wadjet stared up at it, blinking. "...didn't ssssee that coming..." she muttered in surprise.

He descended from the sky, wings folded as he built up speed. He would only have one chance to inflict enough damage to turn the tide, and he would only get close enough if he came in with the sun at his back, where the light shone off his metal feathers like new, hiding him in the glare...and as fast as possible. He hadn't had wings for a while. There was a very real chance he wouldn't be able to pull out of this dive...but if it worked, then it would be worth it.

Even if they hated him evermore after this - something he could not blame them for - his family would live. His choice was made. For good or for ill, he was one once more...a page in the Cooper Legend once more in the sky.

"...and the only thing that stands in my way is the two of you!" Seft bellowed as he began to crush Carmelita.

"Not quite," he declared calmly, remembering his voice. Spreading his wings, he blotted out the sun...then shifted so light reflected off his living metal feathers straight into Seft's eyes. He drowned out the Scorpion King's bellow...with Clockwerk's hunting shriek.

He slammed into Seft's chest at full speed, knocking him back several dozen yards despite being less than a quarter of his mass, small enough Seft coul grasp him in four limbs and tear him apart...but Seft wouldn't dare, not with Clockwerk's talons embedded in his wound and pulling.

"You think you can hurt me, Clockwerk?" Seft barked out angrily. "That wound can only be damaged-"

"By a weapon forged of divine alloy," Clockwerk interrupted. "Forged in sacred and unholy fire, cooled in the Divine River..." Panels slid back on his cheeks, revealing two bloodstains. "And linked to the ones who wounded you by absorbing their blood in forging. That was almost too easy to collect."

Seft stared in shock. "Do you realize what you've done to yourself? By spirit, you are nought but a weapon now! One for your ancient foe and his woman!"

"No," Clockwerk growled as his whole body glowed. "For his daughter!" With a shriek, he jerked back...and tore the wound wide open.

Seft staggered back with a bellow of pain. "I will drag you to hell!" he roared as he lunged forward.

Panels on Clockwerk's back opened, and a barrage of lasers and missiles blasted Seft, knocking him back and making him stagger. "It is where we both belong," he snarled out. He then glanced over his shoulder. "What are you idiots waiting for? Loopholes only stretch so far, and I can only hold him for as long as my ammunition lasts!"

Shaking off his stunned amazement, Sly raced forward, deciding to deal with Clockwerk after Seft was down for good. Carmelita rushed in after him, and they both leapt up Seft's body as they dodged missiles, lasers, talons, and pincers as the titans clashed.

Before they made it all the way up, Clockwerk's weapons withdrew. "Damn...one chance left..." With a desperate shriek, he lunged forward and closed his jaw around Seft's face, digging his hooked beak into the monster's left eye.

Seft bellowed in rage and agony...a bellow that cut off as Carmelita plunged into his body cavity and slashed open one lung with the shock-blade configuration of her flail. "I...Impossible..."

Sly reversed his grip on his cane. "That's Coopers for you," he snarled before slipping his hook into the beast's beating heart...and ripping it open.

As the blood burst out explosively, Seft roared in agony as his entire body began to glow. Clockwerk reached in, grabbed Sly and Carmelita, and flew off just before the Fell God exploded, the divine energy expelled into the world as the last trace of his ambition was erased from time.

Lost: Forgotten

Clockwerk gently settled down between the oasis pool and the Divine Cavern as Coco and the others scrambled out to see what had happened. He gently set Sly and Carmelita down before flapping over to perch on the cave entrance, where the sunlight would not reflect off his feathers into the others' eyes. Folding his wings, he waited calmly for the questions he knew would come.

Eventually, as he knew it would be, the one he feared to answer was the first to speak up. Coco looked up at him with sad eyes. "D...Deik-Beck?" she asked sorrowfully. "What...how?"

"I was always Deik-Beck," Clockwerk responded softly. "Or...Deik-Beck was always me. Then again...neither of those answers is entirely accurate. It is...difficult to explain, and complicated."

"Try," Sly stated firmly, moving protectively up to Coco's side.

Clockwerk nodded. He hadn't expected his assistance here to earn him any good will...or certainly not enough to balance his sins against Sly. "When you bested me long ago, despite my rage I accepted my defeat. I set out to conquer the Coopers...and was conquered by them. I would always be part of your legend...and that was enough. Then, when Nayla used my body to become Clock-La and Bentley woke me with his message...I realized it was not enough. Others sought to end your legend, and dared use my works to do so. I could not allow that.

"As Clock-La sank into the abyss, I broke off from her in a much smaller form. I made my decision that I would shadow you, and ensure that your legend would never die. Towards that end, I shaped an image and a persona that would be expected." He turned to Coco. "I thought that Deik-Beck was merely a thought construct, a mask I used to infiltrate your group to ensure you never failed...but in your tender, loving care, I discovered that it was far more than that. It was...a part of myself long forgotten. The young owl I once was, who had hope...who believed in love. An echo of it, perhaps...but enough that with your love and care, I...remembered what it was like. To love, and be loved. To want what was best for another...for their sake. To...believe in others. To be willing...to die for others." He turned to Sly. "When I offered to be cannibalized to repair the van and time machine in the prehistoric age, it came from both of us. And then you told me...that I was a Cooper."

Clockwerk lowered his head, his eyes closing. (1)"Revenge is the prime ingredient in the fountain of youth, this I've long known. Driven by revenge, I came back again and again, endlessly seeking the death of your family. For untold centuries, a steady diet of hate has kept me alive...yet it is a bitter draught and feast that I have supped on, a pale anodyne for what I lost long ago. It is a potion I can no longer stomach...not when I now remember what that power was originally for. I have...twisted it, and I am not worthy of it. I am beyond forgiveness, and all I can do now...is accept your hatred, fully justified, and the loneliness I deserve."

He waited in silence, certain that soon would come the imprecations, the hate, being cast out...or worse, the silence as they turned their backs on him. He knew he deserved all that and more, and would accept whatever they brought him. It was his coming punishment for his sins...and he would accept whatever they declared, even if they demanded his destruction. He was ready.

What he had not expected, and was not ready for...was the feeling of soft limbs wrapping around one of his metal legs. Opening his eyes, he stared down at Coco as she gave him a tight hug. "C...Coco?"

"So it was real," she murmured softly as she held as much of him as she could tight. "You thought you were faking...but our bond was real. That's what you were saying, right?"

Clockwerk stared down at her in disbelief. "Y...yes," he managed to say at last. "It was real. But...all I've done, to you and your family..."

"As bad as Neyla was, she turned even worse when she became Clock-La," Coco said softly. "The Hate Chip...it twisted her soul, and that wasn't even an hour under its effects. If you'd been using its power to survive for untold centuries...how twisted had you become?"

"Using it was my choice," Clockwerk spoke firmly. "The actions I took in those centuries were my choice. I will not claim innocence on grounds of insanity. The insanity was one of my own making-"

"I'm not saying the sins just wash away," Coco interrupted. "Nothing can truly fix that. But...when not under its influence, you chose love. You chose hope. You chose...to be good. Deep down inside, you're a good person. You just made a lot of bad choices...and a good friend doesn't turn their back on someone just because of bad choices, especially not when that someone is family."

Clockwerk's eyes widened. "But-"

"You are a Cooper!" Coco insisted firmly. "Dad said it, and it's true! You're one of us! You messed up big in the past...but you've been working hard to make things right, to make it better...and I'm not going to turn my back on you now! You...you're still Deik-Beck to me, and you're good!"

Clockwerk stared down at Coco in shock, his golden optics twisting rapidly back and forth as though quivering. At long last...he broke. Closing his optics, he wrapped the tips of his wings gently around Coco in a loving embrace, discovering in that shared warmth a magic far more powerful than revenge, and far more eternal than hatred.

Forgiveness.

"I'm so sorry..." he whispered, knowing only the absence of tear ducts in his bio-metal form kept Coco from drowning in the flood of tears that would otherwise have come. "I'm so...so sorry..."

(1) Thanks for this speech, RazDelacroix. I knew I had to use it...with some modifications.

Lost: Recovered

Dad wasn't as quick to forgive Clockwerk as I was...and neither was anyone else. I honestly wasn't surprised, and couldn't hold it against him...anymore than Clockwerk did. I'm...honestly not sure why I was so quick to offer forgiveness. Just...he'd done wrong, but now chose to do right, and sought to aid those he'd long wronged... I just couldn't turn my back on him. It seemed...built into my instinctive nature to offer forgiveness when it was sought. He wasn't even seeking forgiveness, but...

I can't wrap my head around it. I just knew I had to give him forgiveness, give him hope.

Dad didn't hold it against me, and neither did anyone else. They didn't forgive Clockwerk right away - to be perfectly honest, it didn't look like Dad would ever be able to forgive him completely - but no one said anything about me spending time with him, either. I was...glad of that.

Unfortunately, things elsewhere didn't look very hopeful. We'd stopped Seft, but...

"What do you mean we're stuck?" Murray gasped out in shock. "I thought once Seft was dealt with-"

"The threat to the timessstream is no more," Wadjet explained. "Time isss no longer in danger of breaching itsss banksss, and Ssssset and Apep will no longer awaken. However, the Cooper bloodline isss ssstill in flux. Assss time isss now, a key ancessstor will not be born. Without Sssslytunkhamen I, the Thieviussss Raccoonusss will not be written, the lineage not presssserved, and your perssssonal timelinesss unraveled. Asss issss, I have energy to sssspare now to repair the damage to the River of Time and to maintain you all asss rogue elementsss...but if I tried to place you all back into Time now, you would be erassssed..."

"Makes sense," Bentley allowed. "All the time travel that led to this point was focused around the Thievius Raccoonus and the Cooper Canes. If the book is never written, the canes never get passed down, and everything unravels." He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Honestly, I'm surprised Sly's even still here if his connection to Bob Cooper was severed-"

"It wassss not," Wadjet interrupted. "The ancesssstor that wasss ssslain wasss not the Cooper ancessstor, but from the branch of the line that would have joined it to continue it." Dipping her tail into the River of Time, she used the water to draw an image on the wall, showing the descent of the line of Cooper from Bob Cooper to one of the lesser wives of Egypt's present Pharaoh. "The pressssent Cooper ancestresss will, in ssssome yearsss time, have a daughter from her union with the Pharaoh. While the youngessst child of the Pharaoh and thusss unlikely to sssucceed him, she will be hissss favorite daughter. At one point in her life, while far from the capitol with ssssome of her father'ssss ssssoldiersss, the group will be attacked by banditsss. In the original timeline, she isss sssaved by a wanderer, whom she falls for. The Pharaoh rewardssss the wanderer with wealth, landsss, and hisss daughter'ssss hand, asss he ssseesss the ssstrength of their love. It isss thisss wanderer'ssss father that Sssseft slew, before he could be born."

She struck the branch that represented the wanderer from the image...and the small figure representing the Pharaoh's daughter began to pulse with light. "Her training in the Cooper wayssss isss incomplete, due to them being imperfectly recorded. It isss becaussse of thissss that Ssslytunkhamen authors the Thieviusss Raccoonusss, ssso no one of the Cooper Line should ever be in ssssuch sssstraitsss without meansss of sssaving themssselvesss. Without the wanderer'sss aid..." The glow around the Pharoah's daughter turned from white to red, then to grey...and then to black. "She will meet a fate worsssse than death, and sssseek death with her own handssss. The resssulting war asss the Pharoah sssseeksss vengeance will tear the world apart...and without the Cooperssss to contain the criminal world, peace will be forever an unreachable dream."

A new figure appeared in place of the wanderer, and the figure representing the Pharaoh's daughter once more glowed with white light. "Thussss, my current endeavor. Finding sssssomeone within the presssent time who can take the wanderer'sss place, to have the right qualitiessss to resssscue the Pharoah'sss daughter and for her to become sssmitten with him, and thusss have him ssssire Sssslytunkhamen I."

The images vanished as she turned back to the group. "Until then...my apologiesss, but you all musssst remain here in the Divine Cavernsss or at the Birth Oasssisss jussst outssside, sssso asss to not accidentally disssrupt the timessstream through interacting with others. I will make it asss comfortable asss I can."

So that's where we've been since for the past couple of years while Wadjet looks for the right 'substitute ancestor'. It hasn't been all that bad. Wadjet's an incredibly good host, happy to reach anywhere in time to get us things we're aware of to keep us entertained. No TV, but plenty of movies to watch and games to play. Divine magic makes a really good substitute for a lack of electricity. She can also provide anything we could want to eat, so meals aren't an issue and are never dull.

I've spent most of my time - when I'm not exercising in the obstacle course she provided to keep in shape and keep my skills up - with Clockwerk, both to keep him company and to try and learn more about him. He's been...very closed-mouthed about his past and why things wound up like this. I'm not sure if it's shame for how he behaved and what he'd done...or if he honestly can't remember anymore. He gave me permission to ask Wadjet...but she told me she can't reveal those details until the Cooper Line is restored. She has said that when the time is right, it will be possible for all of us to see Clockwerk's real story. ...the way she emphasized that, I'm guessing a lot of what we think we know about it is...wrong.

Uncle Murray's had an easy time adjusting to things. Wadjet can generate opponents from throughout history for him to fight when he feels antsy, more food than even he can eat when he's hungry, and a perfect spot for meditation when he wants inner peace. The only time he's at all upset is when something reminds him of Jing King, but he deals with that quite well.

Uncle Bentley and Penelope have adapted somewhat. While there aren't that many options for tinkering, both have found studying the scientific aspect of Applied Divine Magic to the space-time continuum absolutely fascinating...when Penelope hasn't been distracting Uncle Bentley with matters other than scientific to keep his attention. ...pretty sure I can officially call her Aunt Penelope, now.

Dad's memory is still in flux due to the timeline being in flux, but he's managed to remember all the important things. He and Mom have spent every waking moment together...and Mom seems to understand my need to forgive Clockwerk, even if she doesn't agree. Still, even if they are antsy to get back to our own time now that the adventure is over, they're very happy together.

Still, I should get back to them. Last I heard, Mom was checking something with Wadjet, and Dad implied they might have an 'announcement'...

...okay, why is that so amusing, Deik-Beck? ...and yes, when I talk to you as opposed to about you, I'm going to keep calling you that, because that's who this you is to me. ...yeesh, you're so mushy now...

Lost: Found

As everyone gathered in the cavern, it quickly became obvious what sort of announcement Sly and Carmelita had. Sly looked to be fit to bursting with pride, and Carmelita - despite her conflicted expression - seemed to be glowing. Before anyone had even spoken, Bentley and Murray had wide grins on their faces, Penelope was beaming, and Coco was almost vibrating with suppressed excitement and glee. Despite Coco's insistence on treating 'the transformed Deik-Beck' as family, Clockwerk had chosen to remain outside so as not to stress the others who had not accepted him entirely yet. By now, everyone had grown somewhat used to his presence, but his relations with Sly, Carmelita, and Bentley were still somewhat strained.

The only one present who did not seem charged with positive emotions was Wadjet, who sat back from the group in stony silence, watching calmly as everyone gathered.

Sly was the one to begin the discussion as he cleared his throat. "Everyone," he began carefully. "Carmelita and I have-"

Murray opened his mouth, only to be kicked in the side by a glaring Coco. "What?" he complained petulantly.

"Let them make the announcement," Coco insisted firmly.

"Why?" Murray demanded in confusion. "We all already know what it's going to be. Honestly, with the way they've been, I was expecting it half a year sooner."

"It's still polite to let them announce it, even if we can't even feign surprise anymore," Penelope insisted with an irritable glower.

Sly managed a chuckle. "So, were we just that obvious, or do you all just know us that well?" He put his arm affectionately around Carmelita's shoulders, getting a brief smile out of her.

Bentley tilted one hand back and forth. "Little of column A, little of column B, little of column C."

"Column C?" Carmelita asked in confusion.

"C for Coco," Bentley explained calmly. "Even if we couldn't guess it, Coco obviously has, and she's been vibrating with excitement from the moment she laid eyes on the pair of you today. Given our present circumstances, there's only two possible announcements to get that sort of reaction out of her, and you'd have approached Murray and I privately if you were trying to pick a Best Man. Logic."

Carmelita blinked in surprise. "You know, with everything that's happened...it completely slipped my mind that we aren't married yet..." This admission caused Penelope to burst into giggles.

"I can asssssisssst with correcting that delinquency..." Wadjet offered gently, only to fall silent at the suddenly angry glare Carmelita shot her.

Everyone blinked in shock at that interchange. "...Carmelita?" Sly asked worriedly. "Is...is something wrong?"

Carmelita turned back to the group. "We're going to have a son," she said warmly, clinging tightly to Sly. "And...his name's going to be Ha-Horace!" She glared angrily at Wadjet again, her eyes narrowed to slits as she growled territorially at the Goddess.

Coco's brief joy at the announcement of her becoming a big sister faded at Carmelita's sudden uncharacteristic hostility. "...Wadjet..." she asked nervously. "W...Why is Mom acting like that?"

Wadjet sighed sadly. "I have ssssserached," she offered sadly. "Trying to find one with the right qualities to preserve the timeline and the Cooper line...but none live in the pressssent time with thossse qualitiesss...yet. If I sssearch through other timesss, I will be unable to maintain your pressssence in the meantime. However...one will soon be born who will have the right qualitiesss...who mussst take that misssssing place in the timessstream." She looked sadly towards Sly and Carmelita as Sly's face turned a mix of stunned and tragic. "Sssssly, Carmelita, I am ssssorry...but hissss name will be Harasss..."

It was a few months after that before Mom would speak to anyone again. When Wadjet tried to speak to her, she actually struck out with her flail to drive her off. What should have been a happy announcement...instead left everyone depressed and devastated.

Dad did his best to take care of Mom as the pregnancy progressed, and eventually she opened up to the rest of us. At first it wasn't pleasant, as she lashed out vocally at everyone as the mood swings hit her, blaming everyone in turn for having to 'lose her baby'... I'm going to try very hard not to remember that month.

Thankfully, she managed to get control of herself and apologize before the time of delivery. I...I do understand why she lashed out. She knows Wadjet wouldn't do this if there were another option, and it's even logical that it happen this way. It's...just not pleasant.

Mom delivered out by the oasis lake, with Wadjet herself taking on a less intimidating form to perform the delivery. I had no idea Gods could do that...

And what happened next stunned everyone...

Wadjet carefully cradled the tiny infant in her arms, her tongue passing gently over his fur to clean off the afterbirth mess. The Goddess had shrunk herself down to a naga not much larger than Murray to perform the delivery, and had eased all the pain Carmelita would have gone through during labor to make it a swift, painless birth. Once the young Haras began to cry, Wadjet gently placed him in Carmelita's arms to begin nursing.

Carmelita gently cradeled the young raccoon in her arms, staring down as he immediately began to nurse. "It...it really has to be?" she asked sadly.

"I am ssssorry," Wadjet offered sadly.

Carmelita closed her eyes against the pain. "Can...can we stay to raise him?" she asked desperately.

Wadjet shook her head sadly. "If he isss to be accepted into the Pharaoh'sss clan without a place of origin, he must bear the mark of the God-Touched, marked by Fate. To do that, he cannot know you consssciously. Only in inssstinct, deep memory, and ssstoriesss told."

"How...how long?" Carmelita asked sorrowfully. "How long can I...?"

"Until he isss on ssssolid food," Wadjet stated firmly. "...about two yearsss. After that, the way will open for you all to take Coco home...and you mussst go with her for now, and never return to thisss time period."

"But...will he know who he is?" Sly asked sadly. "His heritage? What waits for him in the future? How...how do we know he is going to be okay?"

"I will watch over him," Clockwerk spoke up as he leaned forward slightly, his predatory eyes gentle and compassionate. "Him and all his line for as long as time is unstable, until history is firm and the Cooper destiny assured."

Sly stared up at Clockwerk in surprise. "R...really?"

Clockwerk nodded firmly. "Even if it takes a thousand thousand years. Haras Cooper will know what awaits his descendants, and what must be done to prepare for them. And I will remain endlessly in the shadows of the Coopers, keeping death at bay that they can grow to be the shadow guardians the world needs."

"You mussst not interact with them once the line leavesss Egypt," Wadjet warned. "Nor with anyone elssse. If you take up thissss role...all that awaitssss you isss eternal lonelinessss..."

"All that awaits me is penance," Clockwerk corrected firmly. "For as long as my soul clings to this body, these wings will shield the children of Cooper from the sort of evil I once was. This I promise."

Sly stared in shock at Clockwerk's declaration...but Carmelita reached over and wrapped an arm around one metal leg. "...thank you..." she whispered on the verge of tears as she cuddled her infant to her breast.

Little Haras nursed away, unaware of the fate that awaited him.

Lost: World

Taking care of little Haras after that was...bittersweet. He was absolutely adorable and precocious, and definitely enjoyed the time he spent with us all as we worked to raise him for those first two years...but there was always that little voice in the back of our minds, reminding us that we would be saying goodbye all too soon. Mom took it worst of all...but it also led to a reconciliation between Mom, Dad, and Deik-Beck...even if they were still calling him Clockwerk.

All too soon, Wadjet came back to us, watching over as Haras toddled up to Deik-Beck. We knew what was coming...

"The time hassss come," Wadjet spoke softly, apologetically. "Harasss isss now old enough that, with guidance from mysssself and Clockwerk, he will ssssurvive and thrive in the wildernessss. Thisss will inssstill in him the right traitsss he will develop naturally to repair the broken bloodline, the broken timeline."

Carmelita did her best not to cry as she held Haras' hand for the last time, knowing for all their sakes she had to let him go now. Sly held her tight to offer comfort as he stared sadly at the son he would never get to raise...and never know as an adult, leaving him on his own even younger than he was. "Will...will he be alone out there?" he asked worriedly.

"That hasss not yet been written," Wadjet offered in a sibilant tone. "He will thrive in the wildernesssss, and he will ssssave the ancessstor, and complete the bloodline. How thisss will come to passsss...that isss yet to be revealed."

"You have all spent time with him," Clockwerk offered comfortingly. "He is used to being surrounded by many. He will seek out others to be with, and I will ensure he does so safely."

Sly managed a worried smile. "T...thank you..."

Everyone sat silently for a time. Eventually, it was Penelope who spoke up. "So...this is when we leave, right?" she asked sadly. "How are we leaving? And where, not to mention when, are we going?"

Wadjet smiled softly. "That hassss already been taken care of-"

At that moment, the van appeared out of nowhere in front of the group, screeching to a halt in front of the group as Crazy Hassan hopped out of the driver's seat. "And Crazy Hassan delivers!" he declared excitedly as he popped open the engine cover to demonstrate. "Traveling the Void doesn't work well without protection, but you left your time van behind and it already had proper protection! So I just stuck some Void Camels into the engine block!" He pointed to where four tiny camels trailing black smoke stood on a treadmill hooked to the turbines. "Threw in Void Positioning System with Equestria destination at the proper time already programmed in, free of charge! Crazy Hassan goes all the way for valued customers! Even expanded internal dimensions with a Time Camel, a Dimension Camel, and a Space Camel so all could sit comfortingly, real premium services!"

Sly managed a smile at that. "Well, that certainly sounds interesting-" His words cut off as he glanced into the back of the van and saw several beds, a full fridge and mini-bar, two love seats, three sofas, two TVs, and a full arcade with three camels wearing fezes and long, brightly colored scarves standing around the edges. "...don't suppose you've got one to help Clockwerk look after our kid?" he asked jokingly.

"Plot Camels!" Crazy Hassan declared excitedly, pulling out a pony-sized camel. "Perfect companions for growing heroes. Grows with you, and will always get you where you need to be right when you need to be there! This little lady's name is 'Sexy', and only ridden once by strange man who lost his Blue Box so he could find it again. Only 25 Thief-Net coins, real bargain!"

"Deal," Sly agreed with a laugh as the little camel marched right up to Haras to stand beside him.

"Happy customers are best customers!" Crazy Hassan declared happily. "If you're anywhere other than Equestria and have need of me, just ask! I find you!" With that, he turned and stepped around a sand dune and promptly vanished.

Everyone took the time to give one last goodbye to Haras and thanks to Wadjet and Clockwerk...then clambered into the van as Murray drove it into the Void.

The van drove calmly through darkness and nothingness as one of the TVs glowed as the VPS announced the directions. "Drive approximately 3300 years forward until history has stabilized, then turn left. Observe history's correction on the wide screen to pass the time."

As the group watched, time unfolded...

It was a long ride, although time didn't seem to really be passing. We did get to watch Haras' history unfold. Much to our pleasure, it didn't take long for him to find friends to grow up with. ...much to our surprise, they were a desert tortoise and hippo from the Nile, that history scanners confirmed were direct ancestors of Bentley and Murray! Much to Mom's consternation, while the trio thrived in the wilderness...they thrived by stealing from gangs of bandits. Dad couldn't stop laughing for an hour as he watched the 'Proto-Cooper Gang' lead bandit gangs 40 strong and more on wild goose chases leading to them being captured by a fox who acted as the head of the Pharaoh's Guard. He was constantly shouting imprecations at the gang he could never prove actually existed, since they always escaped by leaping onto Deik-Beck's back off the edge of a cliff.

The Plot Camel 'Sexy' proved to do exactly as advertised, and Haras was in the right place at the right time to keep the Pharaoh's daughter from getting captured by the brigands who would have ended her fate...only to whisk her back to the capitol on Deik-Beck's wings, making the arrival look very divine touched. As a result, Haras Cooper was welcomed into the Pharaoh's family once he was learned to be an orphan, and betrothed to the Princess once the attachment was seen to be mutual and genuine.

...one unexpected change to history was Haras' obsession of bringing horses to ancient Egypt, and specifically trying to breed a smaller one that would thrive in the heat of the desert. I guess he remembered me after all.

In the proper time, Slytunkhamen I was born, and began the Thievius Raccoonus so that any member of the bloodline would have access to all the skills, so that none would ever need rescuing like his mother had.

As we watched history playing out, Murray accelerated so we wouldn't be sitting through 3300 years straight, the screen now only showing us highlights as Deik-Beck watched over the bloodline without interacting directly, interfering only when needed. We saw him add the page about controlling body temperature to the Book so we would find it right when I needed it. We saw him watching sadly at each time period where we'd traveled to meet the ancestor...events that no longer happened now that time was restored. Murray started to slow down as we saw him use his Hypno-Eyes to control Henriette's crew to steer them out of a storm sent after them magically by enemies of the Cooper Crew, a storm they couldn't have escaped otherwise.

It was during the life of Henriette's son that Deik-Beck...gave out. His soul no longer had the strength to sustain himself in his metal body, and knowing he was on his last legs he made direct contact. The legends of the family - passed down by word of mouth - had spoken of the 'metal bird' who had watched over them since the days of Slytunkhamen, and so he gave him a final resting place, in a museum where the family stored much of their loot as 'historical finds', an offshoot of the Cooper Vault that was easier to access.

...it was two generations later when things went wrong.

It started out happily enough. The Cooper of that time took on an apprentice thief, a little orphan owlet by the name of Klaw. He was nearly as skilled as any Cooper in thieving, and right at first our ancestor was happy to raise the little one as part of the family and teach him the ways of thieving not from the Thievius Raccoonus. That is...until Klaw began to grow sweet on his teacher's daughter, and she on him.

That was where the seeds of darkness began...

Lost: Heart

Her name was Cara Cooper, and she was her father's pride and joy. He was bound and determined to get her the best of everything in life. The best food, the best dresses, the best education, the best training...and the best marriage match to raise her even further in society. Even with what Henriette and Kyuubi had managed, the Cooper line was only considered minor nobility, even if they were considered part of the Royal Family by adoption as part of Kyuubi's reward for his service to the crown. That just meant they were secure, not respected or having that much political power.

Of course, the 'best match' meant there was no way her father could tolerate his daughter becoming attached to an owl and having 'half-breed' children, not that he'd dare put it that way. Instead, he tried to be careful, limiting the time they could be together based on how he arranged their training and education, all while practically throwing 'appropriate matches' at Cara whenever Klaw was somewhere else. Of course, anyone who's ever read a romance will know all that did was make the two that much more desperate to find time they could sneak to be together.

Then came the actual moment, when Klaw and Cara were both fifteen. Cara's father took Klaw aside and talked to him about the legacy of the Coopers, the importance of the line...and how important it was that Cara be matched with someone who proved worthy of siring the next generation, of raising the family to greater heights as opposed to possibly bringing it crashing down. Klaw, respecting his teacher and desperate for approval, asked how he might prove he was worthy, as he was only an orphan apprentice. His teacher had ordered him to go out into the world and create for himself a legacy to rival that of a Cooper, and if he returned bringing greatness to raise the Coopers higher, than he would be worthy of Cara...but only if he left immediately. This left Klaw no time to tell Cara goodbye...just as his teacher planned.

All of us watched as Klaw boarded a ship to sail off to make his name, fortune, and legacy...and Cara's father telling Cara that he'd gone chasing after 'some seabird', with some idle comment about how 'flighty' avians could be. We...did not take it well when we saw that...

Sly stared in disbelief as he watched one of his ancestors so cruelly drive the pair apart. "...why?" he gasped out in frustration. "Why would he do that? That...that can't really be a Cooper, can it?"

"I know it's hard seeing it be someone from your own family," Carmelita allowed softly, "but I've seen parents do far worse to ensure their children had 'what was best for them', whatever the kids thought. And...it fits the era, especially for social climbing nobility."

"I don't want to see where this part is going," Coco whimpered softly, clutching a Deik-Beck plushy she'd crafted for herself. "Can we see what happened with Klaw instead?"

"Actually, if history connected to itself, we don't really need to," Bentley pointed out thoughtfully. "This is where the first Klaww Gang came from. They were a legendary group of privateers in this time period, able to rob just about anyone blind and finding ways around even the tightest security. No one was ever able to figure out how they pulled off all their heists, and could only prove it was the same gang each time since each one had the mark of the claw slash in the wall behind the stolen item."

"I think I can answer that with what I'm seeing," Penelope spoke up thoughtfully. "Plainly, Klaw was talented and smart...and he teamed up with several other avians. He was raised around Coopers and the Cooper techniques...and saw enough to reverse engineer a few and adapt them to avian thieving techniques." She whistled appreciatively as the screen showed Klaw and a few of his 'seabird' compatriots swoop into a structure, fold themselves through tiny spaces, and then vanish into shadows with the goods leaving only their calling mark behind. "Impressive..."

"Well, I suppose-" Sly began, only to freeze as he saw something Klaw was working on on the screen. "Is...is that the Hate Chip?" he demanded intensely.

Bentley quickly checked the historic readout. "...not exactly, though it's probably what became the Hate Chip," Bentley allowed sorrowfully. "It's a combination of magic, alchemy, and technology that's years ahead of its time from inscriptions in the Thievius Raccoonus...to create a device that turns emotional energy into physical energy. The stronger something was felt, the stronger the effect. And..." His expression slowly fell. "Since Klaw wanted to prove worthy of caring for and protecting Cara...it's currently shaped to turn love into a shield. The more he loved whoever wore it, the more impenetrable the shield would be..."

"So less a Hate Chip and more a...Heart Chip?" Carmelita asked sadly. Bentley could only nod.

After that, it wasn't long before we saw what we'd all feared. Having become the most infamous gang of thieves, outlaws, and brigands the world over, the Klaww Gang returned to their home port, Klaw intending to present his reputation and the Heart Chip as proof that he was worthy of Cara, who he was certain had waited for him since their attachment was true and genuine...only to find the worst.

Having been convinced by her father that Klaw had abandoned her, Cara had finally allowed an arranged marriage to someone her father had picked out to be good both for her and the bloodline. She had not loved the raccoon, but accepted the union as something that was bound to happen given her station. She'd even had a son. This all would have been something Klaw could have accepted, even if he hated it, but he would have been there for her as a friend, part of the family...

But her husband had gotten it into his head to try and 'win her over' by proving himself as a Cooper thief. His reckless attempt...had gotten Cara killed. On learning this, Klaw had become enraged...and the rage had fed into the Heart Chip he'd hung around his neck to carry close to feed on his love for Cara, and then fed the hate back into him in an amplifying spiral...

The elder Cooper stared in horror at the bloody mess left on the floor of the family museum, what had been left of his - admittedly foolish - son-in-law. "What have you done?" he demanded aghast as he pulled his grandson close.

"What have I done?" Klaw shrieked out in mad rage as his eyes glowed golden. "I have avenged her! He was a fool who wasted the purest beauty to ever walk this world, and sent her to an undeserving grave!" He flicked his wings out, spraying the blood from his feather tips as he flicked a bit of offal from his beck. "As you were fool to force her to defile herself with him, and for what? For glory? For honor? There was neither in him!"

"You are a monster!" the elder Cooper gasped as he pulled his terrified grandson away. "I curse the day I took you in!" He didn't notice one of the cables holding the metal owl up over the scene snapping, the construct swaying. "I curse the day I let Cara befriend you!" Another cable snap. "And I curse you for this, that you should walk the Earth until you know the pain you have caused and repent!"

The second to last cable snapped, and the roof began to creak as there was only one cable holding too much weight to a single point. Klaw stalked forward. "And I curse you, fool! You and all your blood, that you waste the greatness you have in blind arrogance! There is no repentance in me, not if I walk the Earth a thousand thousand years! And if I shall walk that long...then I shall be the wings of death upon your blood, and you shall live as long as I and watch the flower of your blood you wasted endlessly struck down in their prime, only a single seed carrying it on until the legend of Cooper is no more!"

The last cable broke, and the metal owl swooped down, the beak open. Klaw looked up in shock...and roared in fury as the Heart Chip jammed into the slot that had been made for it, twisting from the rage to become the Hate Chip as Klaw was consumed by the metal specter that had once been feared, then loved...and now feared again.

"Thus says Clockwerk!" Clockwerk shrieked out as he exploded out of the museum, sending rubble flying everywhere as the elder Cooper was left crippled, barely escaping alive and with his grandson.

We could only watch after that as the next few centuries played out in an all too dreary manner. Clockwerk endlessly followed the Cooper line, waiting until each new child of the line was old enough to fend for themselves before striking down the parent in the field, ensuring the line could never achieve true greatness ever again. The cycle continued until the time he came after Grandpa...and saw the single father, the single son, and the late wife, echoing back to the almost forgotten memory of the loss of Cara. The rage and the Hate Chip ensured there was only one outcome there.

It wasn't long until we caught up to the present...and we were a somber group as we got there, but a surprise awaited us...

Everyone stared helplessly at the screen as it finally went dark after showing their final battle with Le Paradox over Paris, having seen their story play out from beginning to end to beginning again. No one said anything, unwilling to break the silence that hung like a pall over them as they saw how one person's blind ambition, one terrible accident, and bad timing had turned what had been meant to be an ultimate expression of love and a good bird into a terrible weapon and madness.

"Turn left here, and detour through Elysium Fields to Equestria," the computer spoke up calmly. "Screen locked onto Reunion Plaza on the corner of Dues Ex and Happy Endings."

The screen turned on again, and showed a rather scruffy looking owl staring in disbelief as a female raccoon stood waiting for him. "C...Cara?" Klaw gasped out in disbelief.

Cara smiled softly. "I couldn't wait in the world of the living...but I never stopped waiting for you, Klaw. I knew you'd come back to me...someday."

"I..." Klaw turned away. "I don't deserve this. I...I've done such horrible things. I...I don't belong in paradise..."

"Well you don't belong in purgatory either," Cara offered softly. "You have dedicated centuries to penance. And besides...maybe it's not just your own effort that brings you here, where I've waited so long."

"W...what do you mean?" Klaw asked in surprise, turning back to her as she approached.

"I've earned my paradise...but it won't be that without you," Cara said softly, gently slipping her fingers between his feathers, finding the part of the wing shaped almost like a hand but not quite, enough to hold. "So please...come with me now. I've missed you..."

Klaw managed a soft smile, tears pouring from his eyes. "I...I've missed you too...I'm so sorry..."

There wasn't a dry eye in the van as it moved silently past the plaza as the two star-crossed lovers walked into the mists of eternity.

Found: Job

"Turn right into Dimension Harmony-Vector-16," the VPS system announced as the van moved past the Reunion Plaza. "Be certain to turn only into Harmony-Vector-16. Harmony-Vectors 1-15 are stabilized, and will violently reject the vehicle. Vectors 17-20 are presently unstable, and entering will cause unexpected backlash into Vector 16. Vectors 21 and upward are still forming at this point in relative space-time-dimensions, and will not accept intrusion. Keep an eye out for elements from Harmony-Vector-7, as they have a tendency to ignore many laws of reality in pursuit of fun."

"At least they're numbered," Murray mused as he turned the van into the dimensional path marked with a large '16'. "Here's hoping the one from number seven-"

"Intrusion detected!" the VPS announced as cupcakes on plates appeared in front of everyone, Coco's saying 'Welcome Home' atop it in bright pink icing. "...intrusion classified as harmless. Enjoy the reality breaking sweets."

Chuckling, Coco took a bite of her cupcake...only to moan softly before blushing brightly. "Hope I get to taste something that good again soon," she muttered under her breath. "...even if it's not a cupcake."

"Turn left into Manehatten before thinking too hard about the nature of sweet treats," the VPS intoned firmly. "Turn right into the Plaza Hotel Carriage Parking Lot, and find a parking space. Proceed on hoof to floor seventeen, room 5, to intersect original timeline."

"That's for me," Coco said quickly before anyone else could try their cupcakes and discover what sort of reaction she'd had to trying hers. Quickly slipping her thief gear into her folded space where she stored the tools she wasn't actively using, she left herself in just the sailor collar, ascot, and hair clip she'd been wearing when she was first pulled through to Sly's world. "Wish me luck!" she called out before hopping out of the van.

"Stay in contact!" Bentley called out as he and Penelope got the van's communications rig online.

Smiling, Coco tapped her ear where a communicator bead was hidden, matching her coat perfectly. With that, she headed for the nearest stairwell before heading straight up to the seventeenth floor. She was unsurprised to discover she wasn't even winded...and wasn't certain whether or not she should act like she was. How much of that was a result of all her training, and how much was what she was already capable of?

Before she could think further, the door to room 5 burst open and a mare stormed out, sneering dominantly at Coco. The mare was light pink with a purple mane and tail and a Cutie Mark (how did she suddenly know that term?) of three different colored buttons, wearing a two-tone blue scarf and an off-white headband to hold her mane up. "Well there you are, Coco!" she snapped out irritably. "What kept you? I don't pay you to slack off and leave me hanging!"

"No Miss Suri," Coco responded immediately, affecting a cringe. While the behavior was a result of interpretation on how this mare plainly expected her to act, the name came of its own accord once she spoke that way. She already didn't like this mare and was considering hitting her in the back of the head with something as soon as her back was turned.

"Now Coco," Sly chided through the communicator bead, "I know that twitch. Give her a chance before judging her-"

"Well get in here already!" Suri snapped out, pushing Coco into the room before slamming the door shut. A few dresses that showed signs of Coco's hoof were set on ponnequins as an obvious distraction, and a roll of absolutely stunning brilliant purple fabric with glittering streaks of gold, silver, and other colors almost hidden within was placed against some empty ones. "Prim Hemline's rehearsal starts soon, and I managed to get an absolute stunner of a con pulled off! A foolish idealist from some nowhere town is competing, and while she doesn't have brains she's got talent. I managed to con a whole roll of her 'special fabric' she made her line for this show out of, and I fed her a 'show time' a half-hour later than standard. If you get off your flank and pull your weight for once, we can have the entire line copied under our name before she even gets there, and she'll have to bow out or look like a copycat!" She turned to the ponnequin. "Now don't just stand there, hand me that ruler! I need to make sure this line is straight-" Suri slumped limp as the ruler struck her just right across the back of her head, sending her into unconsciousness.

Coco calmly caught the ruler as it bounced back to her. "Any ideas where we can stash her?" Coco asked her family calmly. "Because I have this overpowering urge to start experimenting on her with the Mask of Dark Earth just to see what happens in this world where the magic is so much stronger, and I don't think I have time for that and the show."

"...I want to chide you for rash action," Carmelita began awkwardly, "but if you hadn't done that, I'd have found a way to do so."

"From the sound of it, she's a lot like the kind of crooks we went after originally," Murray pointed out happily.

"Looks like we've still got some work to do, then," Bentley observed calmly. "Penelope's on her way up in a stealth suit to stash Suri. What's your plan for the show?"

Coco glanced over at the clothes that showed her hoof-work, and noticed a certain...animal theme to them. "I think I have an idea..."

It had taken a bit of smooth talking and a lot of effort seeming awkward, innocent, and adorable - not to mention lying through her teeth - but with one of the contestants 'missing', Prim Hemline had taken a glance at the outfits Coco had made 'under Suri's tutelage' that the mare had 'praised so avidly'. The fox and raccoon patterned dress and suit that could contract into tight-fitting bodysuits at a twist of fabric (for 'one size fits all' that actually worked), the turtle patterend 'dress uniform' that could function as armor as well, and the feathered gown that seemed to almost float in the air of its own accord...it had immediately been put into the running alongside Rarity's special line.

Rarity herself had praised Coco's creativity and technique effusively, eagerly pressing her for details...though Coco hemmed and hawed about 'just a few tricks she'd picked up'. Still, it was nice talking to someone who was as passionate about fabric as she was, if not more...even if having her family cooing in her ear about 'making a friend' was distracting.

"What do you call this line, anyway?" Rarity inquired curiously.

Chuckling under her breath, Coco managed a smile. "Cops and robbers," she answered readily. At Rarity's confused look, she shrugged. "It's an inside joke. It'd take much too long to explain. But speaking of...robbers..." She carefully handed Rarity the roll of 'special fabric' back. "While I've no idea where Suri is, when I got back to the room I found this fabric next to empty ponnequins, along with a bunch of tools. I...think Suri was planning on stealing your line..."

"Oh...oh goodness!" Rarity gasped in shock, one hoof to her lips. "I...I really should have thought of that possibility before lending out a whole roll before the show. I could have been in so much trouble." She carefully took the roll in her magical aura as her horn glowed. "Thank you ever so much, Coco. I'm so glad to know you aren't the sort to do such a thing."

"Oh, I'd never do that!" Coco avowed in a soft gasp. "That would be stealing, and that's just wrong!"

I really could have done without all the derisive laughter in my ears right then...even if it did help me keep up the flustered act through the rest of the show.

Found: Home

A brown coated unicorn stallion walked carefully down the street in the suburban parts at the edge of Manehatten, levitating a basket of oranges as he walked. The street was deserted, and only the sounds of his hoof falls echoed in the night air. He looked around nervously as he walked, and froze when he heard a can bouncing quietly along the street. Turning worriedly, he spotted the can and relaxed...only to find a shadowy figure completely hidden by a black cowled robe in front of him, breathing heavily.

"Very sorry," the stallion offered apologetically. "You came out of nowhere."

The figure shifted. "Is he friend or is he foe, the pony wonders?" the figure whispered, his voice soft and gravelly yet reedy as though it hadn't been used in a long time. "I can assure you, I am no friend." The figure extended a thin red arm with clenched fist from beneath the robe, and a white-bearded red chin became visible. "I am Lord Tirek, and I will take what should have been mine long ago." As he spoke, the magic levitating the basket was drawn into him...and nothing else. "...umm..."

Coco chuckled as she pulled off her disguise, revealing her Cooper thief outfit. "Wow. Flushing out the one who's been stealing magic around here was even easier than I thought. Lord Tirek, was it? With a name like that, I'm guessing you have a rap sheet a mile long, hmm? Probably a pretty big reward for turning you in, I'd guess."

Tirek snarled angrily. "Your overconfidence will be your downfall, pony," he growled angrily. "I can drain an Earth Pony as easily as a unicorn. It just needs a different focal point. And I already have a taste for your magic..." He lowered his gaze to her hooves as he started to take a breath...and froze as the spell failed to work. "What?"

"Oh, you mean this?" Coco asked, holding up the horn from her disguise and revealing circuitry within. "Self contained magical field. Not my magic at all. Though if you really want my magic..." She calmly pulled on her Mask and pulled out her Staff.

Tirek stared in fear as his magical senses went into overdrive. He could feel the power in each artifact, rivaling the magical force of an alicorn individually. And on top of that, they were blood-bound, and could not be taken by force from their chosen wielder, only passed to one deemed - by wielder and artifacts - as a worthy heir. On top of that, he could see the Resonance Reaction beginning as the artifacts fed their energies into each other, drastically amplifying their power. When he saw them sync completely with each other and the pony holding them, he began to back up nervously.

"Oh, don't go on my account," Coco offered teasingly as she gathered the magic. "The night's still young..."

Officer Crumb Key was a slightly overweight unicorn stallion, his dark brown coat graying at the roots, his mane and tail long turned silver. His handcuff Cutie Mark had sent him into law enforcement, where he dedicated himself to cleaning the streets of Manehatten and protecting the citizenry from the dangers of street toughs, gangs, and the ever present wheelers and dealers that sought to take advantage of the innocent.

...nopony on the force or the streets had the heart to tell him the only place Manehatten saw such things was in plays put on by the street theater. Besides, he was a genuinely good soul who did do good for everyone and had a record of reuniting lost foals with their parents, and everypony hoped he would distinguish himself enough to make Desk Sergeant before he killed himself trying to walk his beat.

As such, he was unsurprised when a Cooper mask fluttered down towards him as he walked his beat. Catching it in his magic, he turned into a nearby alleyway. "What have ye got for me tonight, Miss Cooper?" he asked calmly. All his instincts told him the masked mare was most definitely a thief...but those same instincts also told him she was good for the community.

'Miss Cooper' - as he knew her - hung upside down from the base of her cane, which was hooked on a few power lines. Below her, a crimson centaur was bound and gagged, unable to move or speak and looking like he'd just been put through the wringer. "I found out who's been stealing magic around town," she offered readily. "Seems he was ready to start stealing it from ponies tonight. He called himself Lord Tirek, so he probably has a rap sheet."

Crumb Key doffed his hat in respect. "I'll just take this feller in. Though if he's as dangerous as all that, there's probably a reward fer his capture."

"You know where to send it if there is," 'Miss Cooper' offered warmly. "Pleasure seeing you again." With that, she raced up her cane and vanished.

Officer Crumb Key whistled jauntily as he dragged the recumbent figure off to jail...and eventually to Tartarus via Royal Guard escort. Sergeant Crumb Key then happily sent on the reward to the account he'd sent previous rewards to. He knew that money would go to a good cause.

'Miss Cooper' dropped easily down in front of the orphanage, startling the matron as she appeared. "Oh, Miss Cooper! I wish you wouldn't do that. I'm not as young as I used to be."

"Oh, you're fine," Coco teased playfully. "How are the youngsters?"

"Doing much better, I admit," the matron allowed as she looked over the recent repairs she'd been able to afford before turning her eyes to where new blankets and tables filled the halls. "I don't know how you're making that money to help us...and I'm not sure I want to."

"Nothing immoral, I assure you," Coco promised. "My family just prefers our...anonymity." She glanced in at the orphans within.

Each of them was a perfectly healthy and happy child...but there was also something slightly off about each one. Whether wings or horn were an off size, or the mane or coat wasn't growing in quite right, or they weren't ponies to begin with...this was where those orphans who didn't fit in at other orphanages wound up, and - unfortunately - were rarely adopted from. It also got the tail end of funding from the city as a result. Because of this, Coco and the rest of her family had decided to do what they could to improve things there, and was thus one of the primary places they funneled any excess 'loot' from their heists on worse criminals to. This particular donation ought to keep things stable for quite some time, and might even make it so the children could have a few luxuries.

As she looked, however, her eyes caught on one particular orphan. Seeing her gaze, the matron smiled sadly. "Ah, that's poor Guila," she offered softly. "She's a demi-gryph. Er, that's what the griffons call it when the kid isn't quite a griffon, whether the parts are backwards or...aren't quite a bird of prey and feline in nature. They...aren't really accepted in griffon culture, and...so young, she wound up here. I...don't think she'll do well, though. Already she's been given the nickname 'Guila Monster' by the others..."

"I personally think Guila Cooper would be a much better name for her," Coco mused softly. It was the only thing she could think to say as she stared at the little child...front half owl, hind half raccoon.

"Oh...are you sure?" the matron gasped in delight. "To get her a real home..."

Guila turned towards Coco, and she saw how the feathers around her eyes were darker than those around them, forming a natural mask. "Yes," Coco said firmly. "She's definitely a Cooper."

Somehow I know she's yours, Klaw. Yours and Cara's. She found her way here...here to me. And I'll take care of her, raise her as my own. She will learn what it means to be a Cooper, and the history and stories that comes with. And when she's old enough to understand...I'll tell her your story.

And when she's ready, she'll add her own story to this book. The book that is my Cooper record, for the family I start in this, my homeworld.

Finishing her entry, Coco closed the book at last, tucking Guila in as her family crowded around the little one, ready to give her all the family and rearing she needed. Coco smiled as she looked from her to the book she'd closed...and the title across the front.

Thieviues Eques Raccoonus

Setting the Stage

My name's Coco Pommel. Well, that's just for short. Personally, I consider my full name to be Coco Pommel Cooper-Fox, but that's too much of a mouthful even for me. But you're not here for my name, you're here for my story. Then again, the reason for my name is rather intimately tied up in my story anyway...

I'm not too good at this whole story-telling thing. I guess I'll just jump right into it, as I decided to lend a bit of a helping hand - or hoof, in my case - at the start of one of Dad's biggest missions...

Inspector Carmelita Fox looked up from her desk when she heard a knock on the door of her office. This was rather confusing for her, as she was fairly certain she was alone in the building, specifically to set a trap for that ringtail, Sly Cooper. She had the file on those who'd stolen the Cooper family book, the Thievius Racoonus, in her safe, and she knew that information had been accessed circumspectly in the Interpol database. Cooper would definitely come after it, and she'd gone to some trouble to make sure she was alone here so she could spring the trap on him when he least expected it.

She cautiously stood up from her desk. Her shock pistol was already strapped to her hip against her tight fitting blue jeans, and she'd chosen a shoulderless top combined with an open jacket for equal parts warmth and freedom of movement. Admittedly, the look stood out against her orange fur, but she wanted Sly to know just who was taking him down the moment he laid eyes on her.

The knock came again, close to the floor against her door, and she suddenly realized who it must be. Sighing, she walked up to the door and opened it, staring down at the tiny off-white pony, her two-tone blue mane and tail shining against the dark blue onesie pajamas she was wearing with the image of Sly Cooper's calling card - the raccoon mask - on the front. She clutched a storybook in her forelegs as she stared up at Carmelita, her pale blue eyes shining in the lights of the office. "Read me a story, Mommy?" she pleaded hopefully.

Carmelita shook her head ruefully. "Coco, what are you doing here?" she demanded softly, almost unconsciously bending down to scoop the filly into her arms.

"Want a story," Coco pointed out logically, nuzzling into Carmelita's arms. "You do it better than Daddy or Uncle Bentley or Uncle Murray."

Carmelita chuckled softly. "I suppose I do," she admitted, not even thinking about it as she walked towards the break room, figuring Coco would want a snack with the story and she could sleep on the sofa there, tucked in under Carmelita's jacket. "How'd you get all the way here, anyway?" she asked curiously.

"Hitched a ride with Uncle Murray," Coco explained. "He was coming around here anyway."

Carmelita's steps slowed. "And just what is he doing in the area, anyway?" she asked suspiciously.

Coco looked up at her innocently. "...sightseeing?" she offered hopefully.

"Speaking of," Carmelita added, "just why were you looking for me here? Normally at this time of night I'm at my apartment, and that's where you're normally dropped off to spend time with me..." Her eyes narrowed. "Does your father know where you are?" she demanded coldly.

Coco's ears fell flat against her skull. That was all Carmelita needed to see. Turning, she stormed back to her office, Coco still in her arms, and threw the door open, startling Sly into dropping the file he'd just pulled out of her safe, scattering the documents over the floor. "Cooper!" she snapped out angrily. "I knew you were a dirty, rotten thief, but this is low even for you!"

"Carmelita," Sly began smoothly. "What an unexpected-" His words stopped as he spotted Coco, and he promptly crossed his arms over his dark blue jacket, the Cooper family hooked cane tapping against his shoulder as he glowered down at her. "Coco, you were supposed to stay in the van with Murray and not be involved here so you didn't end up between your mother and I on this!"

"But..." Coco whimpered softly, her storybook tilting downwards towards the scattered papers as she pawed at the back. "I don't like it when Mommy shoots at you. I thought...if Mommy was reading me a story...you wouldn't have to fight..." She sniffled as she buried her face against the back of the book.

Groaning, Sly walked forward and picked Coco up out of Carmelita's arms. "Coco, you just don't get it," he explained calmly. "Your Mom and I are on opposite sides of the law, and we're in agreement not to involve you when we clash so you're never forced to pick sides, because we don't want you to have to." Leaning in close, he whispered, "Besides, even if she'll never admit to it, your Mom and I enjoy these little fights of ours. Gives things a certain zest."

"Just what are you telling her?" Carmelita demanded, crossing her arms.

"Nothing important," Sly replied readily. "Sorry about this, Carmelita. I swear as her father I never told or taught her to do anything like this to you. I'd never involve her in our struggles. I'll just take her home and we'll pretend this didn't happen tonight, alright?"

Sighing, Carmelita nodded. "Fine. The last thing I want to explain to the higher ups is how Coco was involved in all this."

Nodding, Sly made his way down the fire escape, Coco in one arm as his other went to his ear. "Bentley, Murray, which of you took your eyes off Coco and let her wander?" he demanded, his voice irritated.

Silence greeted him. Eventually, a heavy voice responded sorrowfully, "Sorry, Sly. She just said she wanted some air. She looked like she was getting overheated in here..."

Sly sighed. "It's alright, Murray. Still, the op's blown for tonight. We're going to have to try getting that file another night."

Before long, Sly and Coco had joined Bentley the Turtle and Murray the Hippo in the van as Murray drove away. "Bad news, Sly," Bentley explained. "I don't think we'll be able to do this again. From the looks of it, Carmelita cleared the headquarters tonight specifically so she could trap you. You won't be able to get back in another night."

Sly groaned, rubbing his head in frustration. "Meaning we'll have to go by what little I managed to glimpse and remember of the papers when I was focused on dealing with Coco..." He turned to give Coco a disappointed look.

"Not necessarily..." Coco offered, a wicked smile on her face. When all eyes turned to her, she slid the book jacket off her story book, revealing the camera embedded in the front cover and the Take Picture button in the back cover. Opening it, she lifted up the inner binding of the front cover and pulled out the picture drive, handing it over to Bentley.

After plugging it into the computer, Bentley whistled in appreciation. "Sly, she managed to get a clear picture of every bit of paper in that file while it was scattered over the floor! We've got the whole file right here, and Carmelita doesn't even know it!"

Sly turned back to a grinning Coco, his expression torn between pride and frustration. "Was that a backup plan in case you failed at 'distracting' Carmelita?" When Coco nodded, Sly sighed. "Great. I'm proud of you for mastering these skills so quickly, but I'm seriously disappointed that you used them on your Mom. At the same time, we do need the information you managed to bring us for our next mission." Finally he frowned. "So I can't ground you over this...but you still don't get any dessert until we get the Thievius Raccoonus back."

"Aww!" Coco whined as Murray gasped in sympathy.

"Sly, that's just cruel!" he offered in a conciliatory tone. "Can't you ease up on her a little? She just wanted to help."

"Rules are rules, Murray," Sly countered firmly.

"I'm the one who let her out of the van!" Murray offered desperately. "If I give up my desserts until we get half the book back, can you cut her punishment to that, too?"

"I'm not your parent, and she's the one who broke the rules," Sly countered firmly. "And don't let me catch you sneaking her half of your desserts, either!"

Now I'm sure you're wondering by now, "Coco, you're a pony! How can your Dad be a raccoon, your Mom a fox, and your Uncles a Turtle and a Hippo? You even walk on different numbers of legs!" Well, part of that should be obvious, I'm adopted...but that's not what you're asking. You're wondering how it all happened.

Well, that's a long story. Dad tells the beginning part of it better, how he and my Uncles came together in a gang...mostly because I wasn't there for that part. But as for how I wound up adopted by them and with Carmelita as my Mom? Well...that part I can tell you. And trust me, it's a doozy.

Further Exploration

As the pair made their way to the locked gate with the Treasure Keys in hand, they paused as they saw yet another objective marker. "Wonder what that is?" Sly mused curiously.

"Probably another Treasure Key," Coco suggested. "We should probably grab it before heading in deeper. Besides, there might be another safe with another page."

"Good thinking," Sly complimented, swiftly making his way up to the top of the tower where the objective was marked, entering into the tunnel.

As the pair followed the narrow hallway, they saw rats getting ripped apart by dart guns that locked onto them as they stepped on a booby-trapped rug, the darts as thick as arrows. With the rats paste, the guns withdrew into the globes that had concealed them.

"...that's not good," Sly murmured softly. "We need to get past things like that...but how?"

"You could probably throw me across," Coco suggested. "If I don't stand on the rug, it doesn't go off, right?"

"That could work for you," Sly confirmed. His eyes narrowed as he caught sight of a rather thick empty barrel in front of the rug. "And I could use some armor..."

As Sly suspected, with the barrel around him, he was protected from the large darts, allowing him to walk across the rug unscathed. With Coco knocking out the guards with her drugged needles, they were able to continue through the area - which revealed itself to be a library - with relative ease. Sly made sure to bring the barrel with him as best he could, to make it past the later booby trapped sections as the path through the library on the floor and through the rafters, making sure to smash the globes with the dart guns inside them as he passed.

As Coco had predicted, there was a safe on the path to the Treasure Key. She was easily able to open it, discovering - as predicted - another page of the Thievius Raccoonus. This one covered a technique of Dev Cooperinda's, a mental discipline that enhanced one's sense of awareness in the air, making time seem to slow down and allowing the one wielding it to more easily evade incoming hazards while jumping.

Once they'd memorized the technique, Sly pocketed the page before leaving their calling card behind. With that done, the path to the Treasure Key was clear.

As they came out of the library, Sly and Coco spotted yet another objective marker, this time at the top of a high tower without an easy way to access it. "Better explore everything," Sly mused idly. "We aren't actually in a hurry until we see law enforcement, and we do want to recover every page."

"That wheel in the ground," Coco murmured, pointing. "It's directly under that platform up there. Think they're connected?"

"Only one way to find out," Sly replied readily, hopping onto the wheel embedded in the wooden platform and running on it, causing it to spin. This caused the platform to slowly descend. After giving it enough impetus, Sly hopped off the wheel and onto the platform, riding it up to where he could leap to the tower. "Nicely spotted," he praised Coco as they entered the tower.

The area beneath the Tower proved to be the primary furnace offering power to the entire base. As soon as they entered, Sly stopped, feeling Coco slump against his back. "Coco, are you alright?" he asked worriedly.

"F...fine," she gasped out, panting for breath. "Just...a little hot..."

"Maybe you should stay above for this one?" Sly suggested. "I can find clue bottles for this safe-"

"No!" Coco insisted firmly. "I...I can do this. I...I can't let the environment...break me. I can...be a Master Thief too..."

"Coco, you're six," Sly cautioned. "No one expects you to be able to handle anything and everything right off the bat."

"I..." Coco took a few deep breaths, steeling herself against Sly's back. "I want to do this. If I run from heat...I'll always run from heat...and I'll never be able to handle it. I don't...want to end up that way."

Sly frowned thoughtfully. He hated the idea of putting Coco in danger of overheating, but at the same time he could well understand her desire to face up to the things that held her back. He was the same way. He felt himself on the verge of relenting, then noticed something off to the side. "Coco, the safe's right there," he stated firmly. "You crack it, and then you get out of here, understand? You're too young for us to be risking you unnecessarily. Your Mom would never forgive me if you fell ill because I let you act recklessly."

"O-okay," Coco stammered out, walking over to the safe and quickly cracking it. Inside were two pages of the Thievius Raccoonus, much to both their surprise. The first page covered a Dive Collection technique developed by Chris Cooper. The second was a page penned by an unnamed Cooper, covering a technique called the Blood of Ice. It detailed a mental discipline that could allow one to control one's inner body temperature in a variety of environments. Apparently, it had been originally developed to prevent leaving evidence behind in snowy or icy areas, but later became useful for hiding from infrared sensors and night vision goggles. Seeing the second page, Coco couldn't help but chuckle. "Guess I get to stay down here after all," she offered teasingly.

"Rascal," Sly chided playfully. Once the two pages were memorized, Sly left the calling card behind. The second technique proved very effective once the pair put it into practice. "Odd that we'd just so happen to find the very page you'd need most of all in the safe that's the closest to the entrance to an area you couldn't explore without it, though. And odd that there's no name on the technique, either..."

"I'm sure it'll make sense eventually," Coco replied. "The pages seem stuck together...almost as though they were a single page before the heat of the room caused them to separate...and this technique was hidden on the inside of the pages..."

"As though it was deliberately left for you," Sly mumbled, thinking carefully. "...I wish I knew more about the legend of our legacy. Maybe there'd be answers there..."

"For now, let's get to the end," Coco suggested. "We shouldn't waste that much time. Just because Mommy hasn't shown up doesn't mean Raleigh's men won't find us."

"Right," Sly agreed, making a mental note to look into that when they were on the way to the next member of the Fiendish Five. Instead, the pair continued through the furnace area, encountering no obstacles that delayed them significantly from acquiring the hidden Treasure Key.

Hellfire

It didn't take long for Mom to give me 'The Talk'. In fact, it took longer to explain why it was called that than to give it. As Mom explained, all creatures had a biological imperative to breed that kicked in when they reached physical maturity. In 'base animals', this caused no problems as there were no conflicting mental imperatives to get in the way of instinct. With sapients, civilized thought caused problems, and the results could be unpredictable. Individuals found themselves drawn to the opposite sex, or the same sex, the same species or different species (Mom and Dad were a plain example of that last part), and lots of people had lots of opinions on all that. Mom thought most of the 'debate' was stupid, and said I should never get involved in it. In her opinion, as long as all parties involved were capable of informed consent - which to her meant 'of legal age' - she didn't care what they got up to as long as all parties involved had given said informed consent. She didn't consider it her business.

She promised that when I actually began developing those imperatives, she'd talk me through it and help me with all 'feminine issues' that developed...and that I was to tell Dad all about them, with every last gruesome detail as it happened. Given how Mom had reacted when Dad ran from giving me The Talk, I get the feeling this was meant as revenge.

After going back to Dad's place for a few good nights' sleep, we set course for the Krack-Karov Volcano in Russia. On the way there, Dad noticed a silhouette of an owl in the images included in the Thievius Raccoonus pages we'd recovered. He concluded this was Clockwerk...and that he was going to be a very dangerous foe...

As they reached the road up to Clockwerk's Fortress, Sly uncharacteristically insisted on taking the roof mounted guns to clear the path for the van, shooting out locked doors, mines, and incoming projectiles alike. "But Dad!" Coco complained. "I'm the better shot!"

"And the smaller target," Sly countered, "so I don't want you exposed to Clockwerk until we're good and ready, understand?"

Coco sighed as she settled back into her seat. "Alright..."

Once they passed the mines, an owl-shaped tower became visible in the distance. Everyone instantly knew Clockwerk would be there, and no one bothered saying anything. Sly focused the weapons fire on the robo-falcons that dove in to attack, along with falling rocks when it was revealed that the eyes of the tower contained a death ray that was being used to attempt to crush them in a rockslide.

As they finally reached the end of the path, it was apparent that Clockwerk was that second most dangerous of foes, well prepared...and could be that most dangerous of foes, competent.

In the next area, they came across yet another obstacle they needed to deal with before they could even get out of the van. 120 computers hung from the ceiling of the large cavern they entered, and they needed to destroy sixty of them for Bentley to collect enough data to unlock the far door. At the same time, fire slugs - creatures seemingly composed of living magma - attempted to consume the computers before they could crush them and collect the data.

Surprisingly, Coco's new Flame Fu skills proved useful, as she was able to draw the fire out of the slugs - drastically slowing them down - and funnel it into the van's nitro system for extra speed if she was careful. This made this particular obstacle far less frustrating than it could have been, and they were able to pass through the security gate with ease.

As they passed, they entered the control center for the tower death ray. A long path almost covered in deadly spotlights and booby trapped with dart guns led up to a glass chamber...where Carmelita was trapped.

"Mommy!" Coco gasped out in fear. Sly's eyes narrowed angrily.

"Coco, stick close to me," he instructed firmly, quickly tracking a path. Nodding, Coco hopped to his back as he leapt forward.

The very security systems guarding the path provided Sly with the path to get to a barrel that would protect the pair of them from the darts, allowing them to make it to the chamber where the capsule Carmelita was trapped in was contained. As soon as they stepped inside, however, a glass wall slammed shut behind them, and green gas began pouring in.

Clockwerk's metallic visage appeared on screens all around the chamber as a dark chuckle echoed. "Sentimental fools," Clockwerk growled out in a cultured voice marred by cold fury. "Empathy has always been the downfall of the Cooper Clan. Had your father been more concerned with his own well being than yours that day, he would have been able to trounce all five of us. If you were willing to leave this woman to her fate, you would have stood a chance against me. Instead, all of you - like your father before you - will be nothing but food for my-" Clockwerk stopped. "What...?"

The reason for his change in behavior quickly became apparent as both Sly and Carmelita found themselves in a bubble of clean air. Coco stood between them, eyes closed in concentration as energy flowed out of her hooves, into the metal floor, and back up to coalesce around them. "Probably...should have read this page of the book...more carefully..." she whimpered as she struggled to hold it. "Uncle Bentley...Uncle Murray...hurry..."

Clockwerk snarled in fury. "You Coopers always have had the devil's own luck...but today the cost for that is due-"

The gas vents shut down. "Get going, guys!" Bentley shouted through the Binoc-U-Coms. "Take this guy down hard!"

Clockwerk snarled as his screens cut out. Sly looked up at Carmelita. "What were you thinking coming here?" he demanded, his voice torn between anger, worry, and relief.

"You really expect me to let my daughter face the devil himself without me?" Carmelita demanded firmly. "At this point, I practically have you for child endangerment just for bringing her here." Though her gaze was firm, there was no true rancor in her tone.

Sly shook his head. "You are incorrigible..."

"Family trait," Carmelita countered with a smirk, ruffling Coco's mane.

Managing a warm smile, Sly led the way forward once Carmelita blasted out the back wall of the chamber.

Cairo Catastrophe

We didn't have much time to scout out the museum in Cairo, so our plan was very bare bones. Uncle Bentley went in through the basement to rewire the systems to grant us easier maneuvering, Uncle Murray was in position to break through some walls if we needed backup or to receive the Parts for transport if we didn't, and Dad and I entered the museum from opposite sides. The plan was Dad would go after the parts, while I spied out Mom and her 'new partner' to run interference.

Things didn't go as planned...

Coco stared in utter bewilderment as she finally tracked down Carmelita and her new partner, a pink and purple Bengal Tiger Coco knew to be named Neyla. She was garbed in brown shorts, a blue tank top, a red and gold hooded cape, and flat shoes, the overall look more closely resembling a video game 'archaeologist' than an Interpol detective. Her choice of weapon was a heavy whip. However, it wasn't the appearance of the partner that caught Coco's eyes.

It was the fact that the pair were already investigating the theft of the Clockwerk parts, and the Gang hadn't even gotten into the museum yet. "Dad, we have a problem!" Coco whispered into her communicator.

"What's wrong, Coco?" Sly asked quickly.

"The Clockwerk parts are already gone!" she hissed back. "Abort the operation! I'm going to see if I can get close enough to hear details."

"Be careful, Coco!" Sly warned softly.

"Always," Coco promised, breaking the communication. She then slowly made her way across the rafters until she was directly above the pair as they investigated.

"So you think this was the Cooper Gang?" Neyla was asking Carmelita disdainfully, plainly expecting her to jump to the conclusion it was them regardless of evidence. Her cultured tone failed to fully disguise her distaste.

"Not a chance," Carmelita countered, catching Neyla somewhat off guard. "The entry was too messy, and there were guard casualties. If this were a Cooper Gang op, they'd have just been unconscious. I know their modus operandi far too well."

"Indeed you do," Neyla observed coldly, her expression calculating. She turned away as Carmelita turned towards her. "Personally, this looks to me like the Klaww Gang."

Carmelita's eyes flicked upward, and Coco pulled completely behind the rafter, hoping she managed it before she'd been seen. She hid a smirk. "I'm afraid most of my attention has been on the actions of the Cooper Gang," she spoke up finally. "Refresh my memory, what do we know about this Klaww Gang?"

"Not much," Neyla allowed disdainfully, plainly disgusted with Carmelita's apparent preoccupation with the Cooper Gang. "We know they deal in illegal spice, and don't hesitate to get violent to get what they want."

Illegal spice? Coco thought to herself. What is this, Dune?

"We've only identified two suspected members, Rajan the tiger and Dimitri Lousteau the iguana," Neyla continued. "Rajan is believed to be based somewhere in India, while all that's known about Dimitri for certain is that he has an apparently completely legitimate nightclub in Paris."

Dimitri, huh? We've dealt with him before... "Thanks Mom," she whispered softly as she made her way back out, realizing Carmelita had deliberately 'played dumb' so Neyla would pass her valuable information.

It didn't take long for us to decide what we were doing next. Of course, we had to recover the Clockwerk parts, and the choice of who to go after first was obvious. We'd faced Dimitri before and bested him easily, whereas Rajan was a complete unknown. As such, we made our way to Paris. We didn't know if the Klaww Gang knew what they were doing or not...but time was not on our side.

Since I could now go on my own missions, all of us were getting separate objectives on each heist, and our own equipment. While Uncle Murray dressed himself in gloves and cape - calling himself 'The Murray' - Uncle Bentley relied on crossbow and tech. With preparations complete, we made our way to Paris, stopping only long enough for Dad to drop the line to Mom as agreed so she'd be on the lookout for us there.

Research indicated that Dimitri had only one of the Clockwerk parts, the Tail Feathers. We'd just have to see what he was doing with them...

The group quickly set up a temporary base of operations in the neighborhood of The Black Chateau, Dimitri's nightclub. They had originally planned to set up closer to the club itself, but the music was loud enough that close that they couldn't concentrate, and the rooms kept bouncing. They finally found a safe distance, and began their plan.

The first step involved having Coco scout the area for valuables they could sell on Thief-Net so they could acquire new resources, as well as anything else she might find that was useful. In addition to her talent with safes, her low slung form allowed her to grab several valuable items at once and transport them back, unlike Sly who could only strap one to his back. To her surprise, this included the discovery of a Vault, though it had a keypad lock rather than tumblers. She stared at it for a time, trying to determine exactly how she would get it open without setting off any alarms...and an idea struck her.

Placing one hoof near the opening lever, she focused her magic into the lock, trying to feel the tumblers. Before long, a smile crossed her face as she felt the tumblers shift and the lock click open. Swinging the door wide, she seized a bit of equipment that - after analysis - could be equipped to hooves, wrists, or canes to add impetus to a diving attack to render the target unconscious. Not particularly useful, but it felt good to snatch it out of the bad guy's vault.

The Final Assault

We weren't really ready when Jean told us Arpeggio was on his way to pick up the battery...the battery that was now empty, and thus the perfect hiding spot to sneak us onto his blimp, and from there onto his flying fortress. Despite this, we went anyway. Even knowing that Jean was going to look after his beloved van didn't cheer Uncle Murray up at all. I did all I could for him, curling up in his lap while we waited inside the small metal canister.

On the other side, Dad actually had Mom sitting in his lap, holding her close. The long confinement was forcing her to face the recent upheavals in her life without the distraction of something immediate to do for our mission. Dad rubbed her back soothingly as she clung to him, doing her best not to cry as she mumbled about what her father and grandfather would think of her. This left Uncle Bentley at odds, with no one to comfort or to comfort him, and nothing to distract himself with. He couldn't even engage in conversation, as all of us were doing our best to be silent.

Once the blimp docked with the flying fortress, we found ourselves a base of operations and began planning our move. First up was reading up on Arpeggio...and discovering just what a genius with tech he was. But given his inability to fly, his reasoning for gathering the Clockwerk Parts became clear. He wanted to fly, and thought installing himself in Clockwerk would give him the ultimate flying body. Although that did make us wonder...why did he spread the parts around and repurpose them for the various schemes in the first place?

As usual, the first thing I did once we were ready to make our move was to go hunting for the Vault. I admit freely that it was the most harrowing mission I'd ever been on. The flying Fortress was stretched out with crisscrossing pathways held aloft by large propeller engines, and no guard rails to keep anyone from falling off to their death, whether off the edge or into the main turbines. The winds were also rather strong...strong enough that they were able to pick me up and tumble me around if I didn't find something to hide behind before the stronger gusts kicked in.

Thankfully, there were interior portions, one of which containing the vault. Inside were designs for thread that could turn invisible when exposed to the right energy...specifically, the very same energy used in Slytunkhamen's invisibility technique. Applying this to our outfits would allow us to move at full speed once invisible, and only draw attention if we made noise. While useful, this was also concerning. It meant someone was involved here who had been studying the Cooper family...with the goal of reverse engineering the techniques. I began to grow suspicious of Neyla...too little too late.

While I was doing that, Dad got the recon photos we needed, which established that Clockwerk had already been fully reassembled in another blimp held aloft a short distance from Arpeggio's flying fortress. Unfortunately, Dad's attempt at a quick counter assault backfired and gave Arpeggio and Neyla what they wanted, locking the Clockwerk parts together. Thankfully, he managed to trick Arpeggio into spilling his entire plan...before Neyla backstabbed Arpeggio and fused herself with the Clockwerk parts. What happened then...

As Coco made her way back from the Vault with the blueprints she'd found, she heard a startling metallic shriek, followed by Sly shouting out, "Coco, watch out!"

Looking up, she froze a moment in fear as she saw Clockwerk swooping down on her. That moment was all it took for one talon to close around her, dragging her into the air. She screamed in terror as she was pulled away from the solid paths and out over open air. "Daddy!" she screamed out.

"Let my daughter go, Neyla!" Sly roared angrily as he raced up to the top of the flying structure, trying to get to the metal bird.

"It's Clock-La now," the unnatural avian proclaimed in a distortion of Neyla's voice. "And I think that's a very poor choice of words." She waggled one talon, showing how releasing Coco now would drop her into open air, much too far from the ground below.

"What do you want with her?" Sly demanded angrily, one hand inside his shirt as he searched for anything he could use to fight with.

"You truly are a fool...this has all been about her from the very beginning!" Clock-La proclaimed. "My Master sent me to infiltrate Interpol and the Klaaw Gang with the express purpose of using the Clockwerk plot to retrieve that which you stole from him all those years ago...his key to ultimate power!"

Sly's eyes widened in fear as he put it together. "...Seft!" he gasped out. "You work for him! That's how you can imitate Cooper family techniques so well, and why so many of the things the Klaaw Gang had in their safes were almost designed to work with them!"

"Yes...he studied your family for a long, long time," Clock-La proclaimed. "And soon this metal body will be charged with all the hate in Paris, rendering it - and whoever rides within it - completely immortal! And then I will carry this foolish pony back to Seft...and the body of Clockwerk will be Seft's weapon to conquer other worlds! Magic and machine, fused together and powered by the darkest forces...they will fall before us!"

"And you think he'll keep you around after you give him what he wants?" Sly called out, trying desperately to resolve the situation any way he could.

"You've seen how big Seft is, and how small this skull is," Clock-La countered. "You really think he can fit? That's a laugh! And besides...once the portal's open, who says he'll still be the one calling the shots? Scorpions aren't the only ones to sting those who carry them!"

Sly leveled his cane at Clock-La. "You won't get that far," he growled out dangerously.

Clock-La cackled. "I'd like to see you try and stop me..."

Gathering: Take 2

Not long after we all returned to the hideout - and before we could begin the next phase of planning - Uncle Bentley got word that Don Octavio had hired a local canal gang, the Blue Vipers, to take out Mom. As Mom was already on patrol in the canals, we couldn't reach her to warn her, so we raced down to the canal to take out the Blue Vipers before they could get to Mom. Uncle Bentley hacked into a police speedboat to gain control of it - and its gun - while Deik-Beck hacked into another. Uncle Bentley was shocked at how fast Deik-Beck gained control of the boat...but I was more surprised at what happened when we caught up to one of the Blue Vipers...

The three Blue Vipers took different canals as they hunted down Carmelita. Sly and Bentley followed two while Deik-Beck immediately took Coco after the third. Coco took control of the gun, doing her best to take down the boat before it could catch up to Carmelita's. She managed to get several good shots in, but the gun jammed from overuse before she was able to damage the boat enough to stop it. "Dammit!" she snapped, quickly moving to try and fix the gun...only to see Carmelita's boat come into view as the Blue Viper hefted out a rocket launcher. "No! M-"

Before she could say anymore, Deik-Beck disengaged from the boat, his optics glowing red. He leapt across to the Blue Viper boat and scrambled up the thug's back, somehow devouring the rocket launcher as he seized it. Leaning in, he whispered in a different voice so quietly that only the thug could hear, "They fall to none but me..." before driving razor sharp legs into the thug's torso and tearing it open before detonating the boat, blasting himself back into Coco's boat as Carmelita's moved out of sight, none the wiser.

Coco hadn't seen or heard most of what happened in the other boat, but could tell it was far more brutal than what she was used to...or so it seemed. "Deik-Beck, what did you...?"

Deik-Beck turned his yellow optics up at her. "He want hurt you," he explained in his piping voice. "Hurt your mom, hurt you. You take me in when I trash. I repay, not let you hurt."

Coco stared down at the little machine. She could feel his sincerity, and knew he meant it. "Just...not so brutal, okay? I know you were made by Clockwerk...but we aren't like him."

"I learn!" Deik-Beck promised.

I decided not to mention the details of what happened with the Blue Viper I hunted down...and Dad didn't go into details about what happened to the ones he hunted either. Once back at the hideout, we started collating what we knew into a plan of action.

Apparently, Octavio was pumping tar from the foundations of buildings so he could sink them on a whim, to hold the entire city of Venice hostage to his whims. He intended to demonstrate it on the first day of Carnival during his opera performance. We didn't have enough information regarding his extended plans to take him down completely yet, so instead we intended a delaying action, starting by destroying the balloons advertising the opera recital. If there was no audience, there would be no reason for a performance, and thus no demonstration.

Uncle Bentley would be seeing to that part. In the meantime, Dad and I would be seeking the three parts of the tar pump blueprints, so that it could be shut down completely. They were hidden in coffee houses, and Dad would be using a disguise I made to get me in and out undetected. Mom had already become aware of the increase in Octavio's aerial troops, and had already sent her troops against them to reduce the number of heavily armed criminals in town.

Once the blueprint parts were recovered - which proved easy enough, as the 'painting safes' they were contained in were child's play for me to crack, given all the practice Mom gave me finding details in pictures - I made my way to meet up with Uncle Murray to talk him into helping take out the tar reservoirs.

Murray smiled as he pulled Coco into a hug. "You need my help, Coco?"

"The 'black waters' are caused by Octavio's plans involving the tar under houses in the city," Coco explained. "To stop his plans and turn the waters clear, I need your help to destroy some tar drums around town."

Murray frowned worriedly. "I...I'd love to help, but I promised The Guru that I'd stay here peacefully until the waters ran clear..."

"So as long as you don't have to hurt anyone?" Coco asked hopefully. "Say...if you were rolling around in the 'Aboriginal Ball Form' with me balancing on you like log rolling and throwing knock-out darts at any guards we encountered until you reached the tar barrels to destroy them?"

Murray's eyes lit up. "That works! Long as it's peaceful, I'll smash anything you like!"

"Oh, Uncle Murray!" Coco laughed, leaping up to hug him. "Never change!"

The plan worked out flawlessly. I ran around atop Uncle Murray as he rolled around, and he used some sewer vents to launch us both high into the air before slamming down to the ground, bouncing us both even higher. I admit, I probably laughed far more than I should have as we bounced up and down, but it was a great deal of fun...as much because Uncle Murray was back as because I loved such fast movement. Still, it wasn't long before all six drums were destroyed, and then Uncle Murray went back out to his own things while I went back to the hideout.

The parting was sad, but I knew it wouldn't be for long this time.

Gathering: Take 15

Once Mom identified the particular 'hero' she was talking about recruiting, I found myself a little concerned. After all, even given his track record he apparently had no supernatural abilities whatsoever - unless you counted the gods' own luck - and the tech he apparently had available was...well, aside from his plane, the schematics Uncle Bentley was able to call up looked at least a decade out of date. I had my doubts.

Still, Mom seemed confident in his abilities...and I noticed in the list of his accomplishments Uncle Bentley called up a mention of someone that apparently was an employee and acquaintance of Uncle Scrooge. If anyone could tell me if this 'hero' was tough enough and smart enough to keep up with us, it was Uncle Scrooge. So I gave him a call...

Coco held the phone to her ear as Deik-Beck hooked into the telephone network to connect to whatever phone was closest to where Scrooge was at that exact moment. Admittedly, it was more time consuming than calling him directly at home or the office, but it did mean getting patched directly to him. Before long, there was a voice on the other end. "Yes? Who's calling, and how did you get my car number?"

"Hi Uncle Scrooge!" Coco responded eagerly as she recognized the voice.

"Ah, Coco!" Scrooge replied much more warmly as his voice relaxed. "That backpack crab bot of yours is full of tricks, isn't he?"

Coco giggled happily. "He certainly is," she confirmed. "I hope I didn't call at a bad time-"

"Ach, away wit that lass!" Scrooge interrupted immediately. "Ah'm on my way to a rather frustratin' meeting. It's a pleasure ta hear from ya. Now whit can ah do for ya, eh? You wouldn't be hacking the phone network for immediate contact if it weren't urgent."

Coco grinned widely. She definitely wanted to spend more time with Uncle Scrooge if she could manage it when this job was finished. He didn't look that tough or that smart, but she knew both appearances were incredibly deceiving. "Well, we have a bit of a situation on the current part of our latest job, and I was hoping you could-"

"Lass, do get to the point," Scrooge interrupted drolly. "Deik-Beck's obviously made the line secure, and ah know thief speak."

Chuckling, Coco went straight for it. "Well, we're in St. Canard-"

"Yer bein' careful, right lass?" Scrooge interrupted intensely. "There's a lot of dangerous types in that city, and one e'en I step carefully around. Ya wouldn't want ta tangle with him, that's fer certain sure! He's..." She could hear Scrooge shuddering. "Just stay far away from any masked duck dressed in orange, ya hear?"

Coco blinked in surprise. A duck dressed in orange? She had been calling to ask about a duck in purple. Still, she needed to reassure her Uncle Scrooge first. "Don't worry, Uncle Scrooge. I'm being very careful. Besides, I've got some potent magic from Down Under helping me-"

"Don't get overconfident, lass!" Scrooge snapped out intensely. "The one I speak of rightly scares gods! About the only way ye'd be at all safe from him is if ye had the Mask o' Dark Earth at yer command, and even then ye'd just be on a even playing field!"

"...what if I also had the Staff of Moonfire?" Coco asked hopefully.

Scrooge was silent for a time. "...by Merlin's beard, I'm going ta need that story in full when yer done," he groused out. "For now, no more spoilers. But still be careful of the one I spoke of." He took a few calming breaths. "Now, yer probably gonna run inta a duck in purple. He's a real headache when he's on the wrong track, but a powerful ally when he's on the right one. And he'll be teamed up with a pilot by the name o' Launchpad McQuack."

"How do you know that?" Coco asked in surprise.

"Cause I want ya ta ask him when he's comin' back ta Duckberg!" Scrooge declared smugly. "I got another mission comin', and ah need mah pilot!"

"And if he asks who the message is from...?" Coco coached curiously. She doubted this Launchpad would take such a message from a complete stranger...especially if the one he was currently working for thought the Coopers were the bad guys for whatever reason.

"If ya don't think he'll believe ya that ya know me, yer overestimatin' him," Scrooge murmured dryly. "Loyal he is, clever he ain't. Still, if ya want a code phrase so he can talk his partner around...tell him ye got a mutual acquaintance who's tougher than the toughies-"

"And smarter than the smarties?" Coco finished eagerly. "I didn't realize that phrase was so important."

"It ain't, but it'll make his partner think it is. The one who outsmarts him th' most is himself." Scrooge chuckled for a time. "Well, I gotta be goin'. It's time fer meetin' with the IRS. It was good talkin' to ya, Coco."

"I love you, Uncle Scrooge," Coco offered impulsively.

"And ah love ya too, lass," Scrooge replied after a few moments, his voice somewhat thick. "Now git!"

With that playful rejoinder, the call was broken.

Uncle Scrooge's warning had me worried. With everything I'd seen of him, anyone that made him that scared made me nervous...especially since the Mask and Staff weren't at full power. As such, I instructed Deik-Beck to search the local net for 'a duck in orange', to see if I could find anything.

There weren't any results. Normally, I'd have shrugged it off...but Deik-Beck located several instances where criminal activity had occurred, the one we were seeking to meet with had thwarted it...but there was no record - electronic or otherwise - of who had initiated it. It was as though someone had excised a duck shaped hole in the records, in the very history of the city.

...that scared me. Someone going to the effort of making sure there was nothing anywhere for a stranger to familiarize themselves with them? And how were they even able to do it? I decided not to mention that part of the call - or my discoveries - to Dad, Mom, or my Uncles. All it would do is terrify them, and make sure they didn't take me along. Not only was I the only one with a chance to circumvent Magica's spells, staying in one place was asking to be hunted down.

Author's Note

For those wondering about Scrooge's strong reaction to 'the Duck in Orange'...

I don't know what part of the canon material it's from, but one of the things brought up about that character was that he somehow had the ability...to kill anything, even things normally unkillable.

Time Out: Dressed for Success

It didn't take long for Rioichi to get in, get the outfit, and get back out with it...with a little computer help from Uncle Bentley, and Mom and I making sure Uncle Murray didn't try to be a ninja. Once we had it, I began going over it to determine the proper course of action. The results weren't what I expected...

Coco carefully examined Madame Geisha's kimono once it was set up on a mannequin in the hideout. It was made of bright blue silk with a flower pattern, with a purple inner kimono without a pattern and a dark blue obi to hold it shut. However, it quickly became apparent that Madame Geisha had a...unique figure. Expected, given she was apparently a rhinoceros, but not something that could easily be worked around. "We have a problem," she spoke up to the others. "It won't fit either of them."

"It won't?" Sly asked in surprise.

"In size, Madame Geisha was closer to Murray," Coco explained, "but there's no way we can fit him in this outfit without major alterations and finding something to fill in the...gaps. It's sized exactly to Madame Geisha's figure. Mom's got the right curves to fill it out, but she's not big enough. The whole thing would simply hang off her." She frowned thoughtfully. "While probably something that might happen at a Geisha House, probably not conducive to getting information."

"I do not suppose you have come up with a solution?" Riocihi asked curiously.

"Well, I can think of one," Coco began carefully. "But we'd need a lot of silk, in several different colors. No idea where we'd get that-"

Rioichi grinned at the sight of Coco's stunned expression as he unloaded several rolls of silk fabric. "I thought alterations might be necessary. I have never worked with silk before, so I did not know how much you would need. The Geishas - and Madame Geisha herself - apparently maintain their own outfits, as they had a great deal in a storeroom."

"Then this is exactly what I need," Coco declared firmly as she gathered the silk. "I'll make an outfit exactly like Madame Geisha's in pattern for Uncle Murray, but designed to make it look like he has her figure. Meanwhile, using the vixen Geisha sign outside the Geisha House as a base pattern, I'll make another outfit for Mom. Then they can both slip into the dressing rooms before making their way out to 'entertain' the guards. That ought to get El Jefe's attention - if he questions who Mom is, Uncle Murray can claim her as 'new scouted talent'. If Mom does a good enough job with the dance routine, she'll pass as a 'scouted natural'."

"Alright," Bentley spoke up firmly. "While you make the outfits, I'll work with Rioichi to choreograph a routine for the both of them-"

"Geisha of this level don't usually dance together," Carmelita pointed out. "It'd make more sense for Murray to introduce himself as Madame Geisha and invite the guards to observe 'our newest talent'. No need to plan a routine for me."

"You...know how to dance like a geisha?" Rioichi asked in surprise. "Is this a normal skill women of your time learn?"

"Depends on how in shape they want to be," Carmelita responded plainly. In a whisper, she added, "And how desperate they are to find any way to spur a return of memory..."

"Alright, it won't take long to make the outfits," Coco responded swiftly to prevent further awkward discussion.

Getting them in proved relatively easy. I honestly wasn't surprised that Dad and Rioichi slipped in to see the show. I did too. What I was surprised by was just how good Mom was.

The entire guard complement in the Geisha House looked up as Murray stepped out, done up as Madame Geisha complete with face paint. "Greetings all!" he greeted expansively. "I am Madame Geisha, here to entertain you! Please, enjoy our new lady's debut!" With that, he stepped back, letting Carmelita step forward.

Based off the design on the sign, Carmelita's outer kimono was a dark blue with a flickering star pattern. Her inner kimono was an even darker blue to be almost black, with a paler blue obi holding it closed. The neckline was held lower, to show off more of her ample cleavage much like on the sign. Her face had been carefully painted white as was the geisha style, and her long, waving dark blue hair had been tamed and looped around into a delicate bun atop her head, a decorative chopstick slipped in to hold it in place. Her long, wide sleeves hid her hands as she stepped out onto the stage, and her shining eyes instantly captivated everyone watching as they slowly opened, the dark brown shimmering pools amidst the white field the paint made her face sucking everyone in.

And then the music started, and she began her dance. This dance was no makeshift routine like what Bentley had thrown together for Murray. Each and every movement was calm and controlled, showing both the shape of her body and her command of it as she moved arms, legs, and body in perfect harmony to the beat of the music, her eyes shifting between each of the guards as she danced, locking eye contact and giving each of them - for that brief time - the impression that she was dancing just for them. The song wasn't even half way over by the time the guards were completely blinded by awe.

As the song moved into the second half, Carmelita's eyes found Sly's she continued her dance, keeping her eyes on his as she swayed and swooped, her whole body a poem in motion as she beckoned, her dance calling him forward and towards her. Sly proved completely unable to resist, nearly stepping onto the stage with her before Rioichi caught his shoulder. Surprisingly enough, the guards were so captivated that they barely noticed.

As the music ended, Carmelita returned to her upright posture, hands once more in her sleeves as she bowed silently to the audience before following Murray back towards the dressing rooms.

As Coco moved with Sly and Rioichi out of the Geisha House, she whispered, "Mom has got to teach me to dance like that!"

Rioichi caught Sly before he could faceplant.

Time Out: Back to the Bedrock

When we arrived in the prehistoric era, we quickly discovered that we were in a vast, snowy landscape. T-Bone brought us in for landing as quickly as possible, since he knew from experience that icy environments did a number on the Turbokat's engines, and if he stayed in the air for too long we'd be coming in much harder and without control.

Unfortunately, the van wasn't in much better shape. The brakes failing before had caused the engine to drastically overheat, and plunging into deep cold immediately after had caused some serious damage to the metal. It would need a complete retrofit if we were to get it running again...and it had to be running to get the time machine spinning. This left us pushing van and jet through the snow while trying not to draw the attention of passing pterodactyl...and hoping nothing worse showed up.

That wasn't the worst of it, unfortunately. Passing so rapidly between 1800s, modern era, and prehistoria had overloaded the communication spell linking us to Felicia, so we couldn't even get any advice from the present. This was going to be rough...especially with Le Paradox able to move freely through time with his own time machine.

As we laid out our problems, we all got a surprise...

"Solution!" Deik-Beck suddenly piped up as Bentley and Razor laid out the problems facing the Turbokat and the van.

"Oh?" Murray asked excitedly. "You have an answer?"

"Van and jet need metal!" Deik-Beck declared. "Deik-Beck metal! Use Deik-Beck!"

"What?" Coco demanded in shock. "But...but if we did that, you'd die!"

"But you live," Deik-Beck pointed out helpfully. "Deik-Beck...grateful for everything. Ready to...sacrifice."

"No Deik-Beck," Sly stated flatly before anyone else could speak. "We aren't going to sacrifice a friend to save ourselves. That's not how we do things."

Deik-Beck stared at Sly for a time, clicking oddly. "Sly...see Deik-Beck...friend? But Deik-Beck...Clockwerk-"

"You may have been made by Clockwerk," Sly interrupted, "and your purpose may have been evil originally...but you've proven yourself a loyal friend...to Coco and all of us. And you've proven yourself good."

The tiny metal crab shook violently. "Deik-Beck...no tear ducts..."

Coco pulled her little friend into a comforting hug.

After we got our emotions under control, Dad decided to scout out the area, to try and figure out where and when we were, and what resources were available. This included tracking down a couple of pieces of the Time Drive that went flying when the overheat-supercool of the engine fed back into it. Despite Uncle T-Bone's eagerness to rumble, the goal of this part of the mission was reconnaissance only. He was just to take photos of their locations...and a structure higher up the mountain that definitely did not belong in this time period.

After getting those photos, Dad also managed to get a picture of yet another criminal from modern times, a gaudily dressed black bear artist known as The Grizz. Mom was able to give us the full low down on him from her memory of his Interpol file. An art thief who had been chewed up and spat out by the art world's fads, he was one of Mom's biggest targets...but much like the other 'generals' we'd encountered on this mission, he'd vanished mysteriously before he could be arrested.

We still didn't know what his plan was...so Deik-Beck and I slipped into his 'fortress tower' through a crack in the ice to investigate.

Coco smiled as she crawled through the narrow ice tunnels that were the start of the passage Sly had found for her to investigate from. They were the perfect size for her, as she naturally walked on all fours anyway and barely had to duck. Deik-Beck followed readily along behind her, snapping pictures of anything he was able to see through cracks in the wall and recording conversations...including one from one of the Wooly Mammoths working for The Grizz regarding one of their number being 'turned into a coat for that Le Paradox guy' for messing up. Coco did her best to push that idea from her mind, not even wanting to think about it.

Seeing several guards at the other end of the tunnel, Coco reached for her needles to knock them out, only to feel Deik-Beck's claw grip her hoof. "Older metabolism," Deik-Beck whispered. "Different glands. Need different toxins for needles."

Coco blinked in surprise. She hadn't thought about that part of time travel. "Thanks for the reminder," she whispered as she left the needles where they were. "Guess we have to go around instead of through."

Thankfully the path around was relatively easy for her to reach, as it involved a great deal of rock and ice climbing...a skill she still had mastered from the Lumberjack Games with Jean Bison. While the memories of the Games themselves were fun, those that led up to and surrounded them were far less so. She quickly pushed the recollections from her mind as she found her way to a large volcanic area, with several platforms in and over the lava...with some creature strapped down to the central platform with mammoths surrounding him.

"Who's that?" Coco asked curiously, trying to get a clearer look.

Deik-Beck zoomed in with his optics. "Large body. Dark fur. Raccoon tail. Spear with...hook blade?"

"Holy missing link, Deik-Beck!" Coco gasped out. "That sounds like a prehistoric Cooper cane...which means that's a Prehistoric Cooper! We need to rescue him!"

Deik-Beck quickly scanned their surroundings to come up with a plan. "Tiger skin!" he indicated, pointing towards a distant bedroom. "Lava! Dread Pirate Roberts!"

Coco grinned, quickly catching the idea. "Hope we don't spook the Cooper too much."

A quick race over frozen walls revealed that The Grizz had the key to the bedroom, which Coco easily filched with him none the wiser. Unfortunately, by the time they made it back to the lava pool, The Grizz had already taken the cave-raccoon's spear and left with it. "We'll just have to get it back," she murmured thoughtfully. "For now..." She tossed the tiger skin over Deik-Beck. "Get to it."

Deik-Beck extended his claws into the skin to animate the arms as he turned his legs into propellers to levitate himself into the air. As he floated over towards the central panel - his optics glowing red under the tiger skin like the eyes of a hungry ghost - Coco used her magic to make the lava rise in unnatural plumes around the central platform. The guards took one look at the 'angry spirit' and bolted as fast as they could.

Much to Coco's surprise, once the net was no longer anchored, the ancient Cooper leapt to his feet and...began to applaud? He then proceeded to grunt guturally in a rhythmic manner, definitely speaking some form of dialect.

"Uh...translation?" Coco asked Deik-Beck hopefully.

Deik-Beck beeped a few times, then spoke. "Thanks! Good Show! Nice Flare! Good Scare! Again?"

Coco chuckled ruefully. "Yeah, he's a Cooper alright..."

Time Out: You Are a Pirate

With Flametail and the hook, we made our way back to the hideout to get him cleaned up and plan our assault on LeFwee's ship. Our original plan about stealing his charts and discrediting him quickly became obsolete with new information from Flametail...

Once Kyuubi was cleaned up, he looked much more the image of a military man. His military cloak remained tattered, but no longer stained or filthy. His cleaned coat glowed a burnished bronze, going from deep crimson to bright gold in the tail like a living flame. His eyes gleamed hazel, a piercing gaze that seemed to see through everything...and his muscular definition was plain as the open military coat showed off his abs.

"Woof," Carmelita and Penelope found themselves saying...only to be shocked that Coco said it as well. "Coco!" Carmelita demanded in shock.

"What?" Coco countered defensively. "You can't tell me he's not a hunk!"

"Mine, ladies," Henriette purred possessively as she clung to Kyuubi's arm.

"Not now, Ret," Kyuubi chided playfully and affectionately. "There's somethin' ya all should know. LeFwee plainly doesn't trust anyone. He's installed his own crew members onto each of the ships that have sworn under his banner as Captains. That and some new form of weapon they have with them is how he's keeping the armada under his banner. If we can take his men out on the ships, the original Captains will likely switch sides, especially if they see the legendary One-Eye taking them down." He grinned roguishly at the lady on his arm.

"So we take down each of LeFwee's Captains leaving the Mark of the Coopers behind, and that'll have the whole armada turning against LeFwee?" Bentley asked curiously. "We can do that. With this ship, we can track down any technology that doesn't belong in this era - those new weapons you mentioned - and find them anywhere on the high seas."

"Oh!" Murray piped up excitedly. "Can the ship make a huge fog bank and sail silently? Then they'll think we're like a cursed ghost ship or something!"

"That would certainly add to the mystique of the situation, as well as have anything blatantly anachronistic get shrugged off as 'ghost stories'," Razor observed thoughtfully. "That would really free up our available resources without worrying too much about upsetting the timeline."

"At this point I think we're pretty much counting on breaking Le Paradox's Paradox Machine fixing everything," T-Bone pointed out. "Otherwise, things are gonna be pretty screwed up."

"Still, we should try to keep either a low profile or a mystic profile," Penelope pointed out. "Otherwise, who knows what butterflies we're making."

"Butterflies?" Kyuubi asked in confusion.

"It's a time travel shorthand," Bentley explained. "It's a reference to chaos theory...and I just realized just explaining what I'm talking about could break the history of science and mathematics."

"The further away you are from a small change in time, the bigger the effect can be," Coco explained. "We talk about 'butterflies' due to a phrase describing the result..." Her eyes widened. "Which...we can't share because you don't even know the locations exist yet..."

"...my head hurts..." Sly groaned morosely.

"Fair enough," Henriette allowed. "Let's go haunt the Bay."

The new plan worked out amazingly well. We generated a thick fog around the ship while using its advanced navigation systems to sail easily through it and track down every ship flying LeFwee's flag. One of us would then make our way aboard, find LeFwee's man, and deal with him while leaving the Cooper Mark - the mask - behind. The ones leaping on board - given our relative abilities - were myself, Dad, Henriette, and Kyuubi. Dad and I generally knocked out the goon and tied him up, with the Mark stuck to him somewhere.

Henriette and Kyuubi...had a different approach...

The fog rolled in, covering the ship. LeFwee's man glanced around, not liking having to rely on primitive tech to keep himself safe. Still, he had a job to do. Seeing the sailors starting to mutter about 'ghost ships', he opened his mouth to order them about, raising his stun gun to fire a few shots...

...only to scream in agony.

The sailors leapt in fear, hearing only the creaking of rigging and a sound like a thin anchor chain reeling in. One of them blinked as something swept by him, plopping the captain's hat on his head. The fog slowly rolled away...

LeFwee's man hung from the yardarm by a loop of his own entrails. The rest of them were spattered against the door of the Captain's Cabin in the shape of the Cooper Mark.

Henriette swung back onto the Gang's ship, her hook retracting on its chain from the rigging before latching back onto her wrist. "Been a while since I used this," she murmured affectionately as she rubbed it.

Sly stared at her, slack jawed. "Y...you killed him..."

"Kid, I'm a pirate," Henriette pointed out flatly. "Dunno what fanciful idea ya have about what that means...but it boils down to a simple choice. Ya can keep yer hands clean, or ya can keep yer hands." She glanced at her hand nostalgically, then took her hook off her stump to show it. "Ya can see what comes o' tryin' ta balance that. There's no room fer mercy on th' high seas, not if ya wanna stay alive long enough to keep th' line going."

Fog rolled in over the ship. The crew of the former Ring Tail - the Cooper Ship - glanced around nervously. They knew most ghost stories these days were actually the work of their Captain...their true Captain. Unfortunately, LeFwee had taken control, and put one of his lackeys in charge. By their honor, they were stuck obeying him unless he died or Henriette won the ship back. With how much of an ass the man was, they were all hoping for the former to create the latter...and they knew they wouldn't hesitate to fly the Cooper flag the minute he keeled over.

St. Elmo's fire raced along the rigging, glowing with eldritch light yet not burning. The 'Captain' was screaming orders, but the crew ignored it. They knew this fire, they knew what it meant.

Like a wraith, a shadow made of golden fire took shape, surrounded by a black cloak as glowing eyes glared at the 'Captain'. In fear, he took a shot...and the figure vanished. A scream rent the night air, followed by a splash...and then the thrashing water of hungry sharks.

As the fog faded, Henriette stood on the prow of her own ship, smirking down at her crew. "Come on, buckos," she purred. "We've got a cheatin' chicken ta cook."

The crew raised a resounding cheer as LeFwee's flag was torn away to kite into the night breeze, and the Cooper Flag returned to its proper place.

I can't fault the truth of what Henriette said. But...that didn't make it any more palatable. Also didn't mean I could be as...callous. She didn't hold it against me or Dad, though, and neither did Kyuubi. If anything, they seemed...glad to know we came from a time where mercy was an option...

Lost: Transportation

It barely took any time at all, relatively speaking, for Sly to locate a ravine where Naqahdah could be mined. While the ravine itself was somewhat well hidden, it was hidden by signs that were second nature for a Master Thief to spot...and once inside the ravine, he could see an entire wall of the place glowing faintly with the energies in question. Once he knew the location, he carefully moved back towards the oasis, trying to spy a path that would allow Murray to get there. He had one, barely, but he couldn't help be concerned at what he'd seen of it. It would leave them both too exposed...and it would be too easy for Seft to backtrack to the ravine, and they were meant to keep him from discovering it.

As he reported all this to Wadjet, she hissed softly. "I know the location," she murmured softly. "But you need not worry about leading Sssseft to that location once you have mined the Naqahdah. You will need to retrieve all that is there."

"All?" Murray gasped in surprise. "I'm strong, but not that strong. It'd probably take me several trips..." He glanced at the map Sly had drawn up, describing just how far away the ravine was. "...assuming I can even make it that far in this heat. Hippos may be native to the area, but that's in the rivers by day..."

"Sorry I couldn't find a river, Murray," Sly apologized. "It looks like the only river in the area has dried up...and from the looks of things, rather recently."

"Dissssquieting, but to our advantage," Wadjet murmured. "If hisss actionsss closssed the river, then the areasss affected will be shrouded by the chaosss energiesss created, making him blind to it beyond hissss mortal sssensssesss..."

"So as long as we manage to avoid being seen, we should be fine," Sly deduced. He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Pity we don't have the van. A bit of a retrofit might make it a good vehicle..."

"Perhapssss-" Wadjet's voice was cut off as she jerked her head upward in time to see a fish leap out of the River of Time upon the ceiling, only to dive back in somewhere closer further upstream. "...I have no idea what that meansss..." she murmured worriedly.

"This is only a theory," Bentley began carefully, "but I'd guess it's a sign that a self-sustaining and self-containing rogue element in the timestream just performed a time jump." He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "That would explain everything about the imagery...except it wearing a fez. That eludes me."

"Do you think it has anything to do with that big tent outside?" Penelope called out from the entrance. "It looks like it's been there for a while...but I'd swear it wasn't there a moment ago. I was staring right at the spot, but I can't remember seeing it appear."

Carmelita shook her head with a chuckle as she practiced with her flail, focusing on controlling the generated magic. "Sounds like one of those 'mysterious vendor' places out of stories," she observed as, with a flick of her wrist, she sent the magic gathered in the lashes of the flail out like a blast from her shock pistol. "You know, the sort that appear down a dead end alley and aren't there when you go to make a return?"

"Well, maybe whoever it is can help us," Sly observed thoughtfully. "If they can travel through time without disrupting it, then we shouldn't have to worry about interacting." With that said, he strode confidently out to the tent.

A fennec fox dressed in desert garb complete with turban sprang out of the tent as Sly approached, straightening a fez atop the turban as he grinned widely. "Welcome new and valued customer!" he bellowed as Sly approached. "Welcome to Crazy Hassan's Discount Camels! You need camel? Of course you do! Everyone needs camels! I promise you I have the camel you need, cheap! All camels slightly used but in better than new condition, I guarantee!" Seizing Sly's hand, he pulled him into the tent, revealing an entire host of camels done up in various colors and inexplicable garb.

Before Sly could speak, the fox dragged him to the first paddock. "Need to cross the desert quickly? I have racing camels!" The camels he showed here had racing stripes on their sides, and running shoes on their hooves. Before Sly could speak, he was dragged to the next paddock. "Need to cross the sea? I have sea camels!" These camels wore water wings, inner tubes, and had white spots on the bridge of their muzzles that on closer inspection could be seen to be sunscreen. "Need to retrieve something at the bottom of the sea made of rare metal? I have diving camels!" These next camels were wearing wet suits, goggles, and snorkels. "Need to see the sky? I have sky camels!" These next camels were wearing propeller beanies. "I throw in map of the clouds too! Great deal, great deal, aye?"

"You...really have camels for every possible purpose?" Sly asked in surprise.

"Absolutely, absolutely!" Crazy Hassan declared excitedly. "I see from your mask and cane you are a Cooper Thief! Perhaps I can interest you in my ninja camels?" He gestured to a paddock that at first glance seemed empty...until Sly squinted. Then he was able to make out camels wearing black bodysuits. "Guarantee no one will see them! Great for carrying loot, yes?"

"I'm...not sure that would be a good idea," Sly allowed. "We're trying to avoid disrupting the timestream-"

"Ah, you want my Anachronist Camels!" Crazy Hassan declared, dragging Sly over to an area of several paddocks filled with camels wearing various costumes from various time periods. "Guarantee to leave no evidence of their passage in history or your timeline back! Only seen use at Ren Faires!"

Sly blinked in surprise. "Uh...okay? Well, we need to mine some Naqhadah-"

"Oh, so sorry, all out of Goa'uld camels," Crazy Hassan apologized. "Sold the last of them to a man with a gold symbol on his forehead. Very nice customer, if a little strange. Strong warrior, good with kids."

"Well, we can handle the mining portion," Sly allowed, deciding not to think about...whatever he'd just been told. "We just need some to help carry all of it back and to keep anyone from seeing us do it-"

"Ah, you want my dwarf camels!" Crazy Hassan declared excitedly. He dragged Sly into the 'Anachronist Camels' area to a specific paddock. The camels here were all half the size of others, had thick full beards, and were armored in leather, chain mail, horned helmets, and were carrying large pickaxes and mugs of ale...except for one in the middle who was the size of other camels and somehow managed to look like a king and only carried a sword. "Great for mining, dig great tunnels no one will find, and can carry three times their weight! Good price, good price..." He hesitated, then leaned in close. "But don't take Kaa-Rot," Hassan whispered, gesturing to the normal sized camel. "He's better for police work than mining, not a good match for Master Thief, aye?"

"Well, I am engaged to a rather lovely Interpol Inspector," Sly mused thoughtfully.

"Ah, very nice!" Hassan praised. "My congratulations! Would you like some wedding camels?" He gestured to ones dressed in tuxedos and white dresses, along with one dressed in a priest's robes. "Great for all occasions!" The one in a priest's robe promptly spat on Sly. "See, he like you! I throw in the chapel, no extra charge!"

"I...think I'll focus on the dwarf camels..." Sly suggested ruefully as he wiped himself off. "And here I thought having a tiny talking pony as a daughter would be the height of weirdness in my life when she started doing magic..."

"Ah, I no sell Equestrian camels," Crazy Hassan insisted. "They speak for themselves, and I don't deal in slavery, only mounts." He turned to go get some paperwork.

Several seconds later, what the crazy man had just said clicked in Sly's head. "Wait, what?"

Author's Note

Thanks to Masterofgames for directing me to this crazy character. I just knew I had to use him somehow, and this was the perfect place.

...I hope you all find it as funny to read as I did to write it.