Rainbow Dash didn't normally sweat, being the naturally talented flyer that she was, but trying—and failing—to fall asleep forced her to excrete such a fluid. Her legs and forehead were caked with the stuff, and her blanket had become something of a nuisance by now.
"Urgh...!" Dash's wings stuck to her sides as she thrashed around in her bed. "Come on!" But still, sleep wouldn't come. Her eyes refused to stay closed, no matter how much she tried. They hurt at the edges, and it was as though her eyelids were rebelling actively against their owner. The night was going to be a long one, she could no longer doubt that.
Up in the air, Dash's house featured a nice view of Luna's moon, but on a night like tonight the light that was being reflected off the moon's surface gave almost the impression of daytime. Even with the curtains drawn, it was too bright outside.
Dash buried her face in one of her pillows, her fur becoming more unkempt by the moment. "This is so lame...!" Not exactly a smooth-talking mare to begin with, Dash's raspy voice rang out muffled by the surface of the pillow. She couldn't see anything from here, but she didn't want to either. She didn't want to see anything. Least of all clocks. Anything that told time. For all Dash knew it was already six o' clock, and the first rays of morning had already come. But deep down, there still had to be time left for sleep.
She had to flee from the waking world, now or never. Or perhaps later, but it was always "now" or "never" to Dash. Time as it pertained to future events always seemed to serve as an inconvenience, so Dash tried to not think about it. She tried to not think about a lot of things. But she couldn't hold back the worrying and sickening thought that she would have to wait until one of her afternoon snoozes—which were only meant to be casual—to catch up on the hours lost. So she had to catch those hours now, however many there were left.
Another battle with her own consciousness and Dash groaned like she was in real pain. The blanket had been removed, tossed off by Dash's tumbling around, and of course she didn't take a moment to notice its absence. Finally, worn out, in a state of defeat that she would never admit to anypony, Dash lay on her back, her wings spread out. The ceiling was her only witness.
"What the heck am I supposed to do, huh?" she said to the cool nighttime air.
The air said nothing in return. It only whispered gibberish, a language Dash never understood. So she was left by herself.
Until another thought came to her. "Maybe... just maybe... I can ask for advice. Somepony's gotta be awake at this hour." Dash sprung up and rested on her hindquarters, her eyes wide open. "Yeah, I can ask around. Just for advice, not like, help or anything. That'd be for losers, and I ain't gonna sink that low." Even as she finished that sentence, her brow furrowed in silent self-doubt.
Floating to her front door, Dash pushed it open and soared out to Ponyville, as filled with energy as she ever would be.
And that was her problem.
Ponyville was normally a quiet place, monster attacks aside, but at night it was practically lifeless. Dash didn't know what the hour was, but the lack of lit windows gave her the creeping feeling that it must have been a late one. Even so, Dash couldn't let the darkness deflate her hopes of finding not-help. She stayed in the air, her wings calmly flapping, watching over the town like an angel.
Like a skilled thief, Dash passed over roofs while making little sound. She could see Twilight Sparkle's castle in the distance and considered the possibility for a moment before saying to herself, "Twilight? No, that egghead would keep me up all night with her jibber jabber. She'd probably try to get me to read a self-help book too, and that's pretty uncool." So that option was out.
A frown gradually forming on her lips, Dash narrows down her choices. "Applejack? Nah... Rarity? Heck no! Pinkie Pie?" She stopped at that last one and shivered with fear at the picture manifesting in her head. It was enough to give foals nightmares. "I like Pinks and all that, but she can be... too jumpy about helping her friends. And I don't need help!" She let out a sigh as she passed by Sugarcube Corner, her party-loving friend surely being too hyper to have fallen asleep herself. Unbeknownst to Dash, of course, Pinkie had gone to bed much earlier in the night; she believed it was healthy to be of the "early to bed, early to rise" sort.
"Huh... that just leaves Fluttershy, then." Dash's mood took a nosedive, realizing that in all of Ponyville she only had five friends. Starlight didn't really count in her mind, since the two hadn't gotten to know each other well enough. Scootaloo was more like a sister than a friend, which Dash didn't mind. Even so, "Only five? Really? Twilight, Rarity, Applejack, Pinkie Pie... and then Fluttershy." No others came to her mind. She began to sweat again.
Dash immediately started for Fluttershy's cottage, her confidence threatening to fail her.
The interior of the cabin overflowed with tranquility. The critters had retired to their respective homes in the forest, so Fluttershy was left to her own devices for the night. And as she was by herself, Fluttershy was sleeping soundly—but this wouldn't last for long.
A knock made itself known at the door, which woke the timid pegasus like a shock to the system. "Ah! Wha..." She rubbed some grains out of her eyes and looked around. "W-who is it?" Getting out of bed with caution, Fluttershy made her way towards the front, waiting for a response. She usually didn't like visitors.
"Shy? It's Dash..." came from the other side.
Fluttershy blinked hard before cracking the door open, peering through the slit. "Dash? What're you doing out here?" She could see her friend's rainbow-colored mane, and turning a little she could also make out the concerned redness of Dash's pupils. She appeared to be in a bad way, and she didn't even try to hide that fact.
"I haven't been able to get some shut-eye, and it's been really bugging me." Dash sounded like she was running out of breath.
"I don't mean to be rude, b-but—" rubbing more grains out before continuing— "do you know what time it is?"
This seemed to bother Dash a great deal, because she replied with, "No, and I don't want to know! I just wanna go to sleep!" Fluttershy thought for a second that her friend would barge through the door in a fit, but to her surprise Dash simply stayed where she stood. Still, Fluttershy winced at the notion of Dash hurting her in such a way. It wasn't completely out of the realm of possibility.
"Oh," Fluttershy uttered behind the door. "O-okay... I think I can help." She let Dash into the cabin, and now upon closer inspection it looked like Dash had gotten into a brawl. Her fur could've used a good coming, and her mane was a mess.
Yet there was something about this ruffled appearance Dash had going that made Fluttershy raise her eyebrow the most. It was well-known but never discussed around town that Dash—for all her bravery and achievements—wasn't considered a "pretty" mare in the conventional sense. Her hips were too slim, her mane lacked elegance, and her attitude made her seem too masculine to appeal to most stallions. Some of the more flexible mares spoke of her fondly, although Dash herself never talked about romantic affection of any kind. Certainly not around Futtershy, even though the two had known each other for years.
"I don't need help!" Dash blasted at Fluttershy, which made her shrink back in frightened astonishment.
"O-okay, Dash..." The timid mare didn't know how to feel, exactly. Her friend was in an awful mood, and was being mean to her, and yet she felt this sensation in her gut that told she had to do something about it. "M-maybe you need a bedtime story?"
"A what?"
"Like—something to lull you to sleep." Fluttershy stood to meet Dash's eye before flying off to her personal library. "It's how moms make their foals go to sleep sometimes—"
"I know what moms do," Dash blurted out. Sadness grew in her eyes. "I don't think reading's gonna help, Shy."
Fluttershy stopped sorting through her books to gaze at Dash in puzzlement. "Is that why you didn't go to Twilight? I bet she knows a few things about how to treat insomnia. At least—I think she would know more than I would."
"Yeah, but ya know, she'd probably lecture me about it. And I don't think I can handle that, to be totally honest." Dash drew circles in the floor with her hoof, shame growing in her stomach. "Look, I'm sorry I'm being so..."
"It's okay, Dash." Fluttershy flew back to sit in front of her friend, and the two looked at each other in silence for a few seconds. Most ponies wouldn't be able to tell, but she noticed that Dash's muscles were relaxing, or at least they were starting to. Fluttershy knew better than anypony that Dash's moods changed like the wind. Suddenly, and in any direction.
"But you don't deserve to get this crud from me. You're, like, way too nice," Dash replied with a false chuckle. "You must get secret admirers all the time or something."
The notion took Fluttershy by surprise, but she didn't show it. "Oh no, I don't get letters or anything. And even if I did—" blowing a strand of mane out of her eye— "I wouldn't know what to do."
"Really/ You don't get that stuff?"
"Nope."
"Nopony asking you out for Hearts and Hooves Day?"
"Nope."
Dash blinked. "Never?"
"I don't think it's ever happened to me," Fluttershy said, her serene expression unchanging, "and like I said, even if I did, I don't think I could deal with that kind of attention. What about you, though? I-if you've ever been asked out."
"Oh." Dash's ears drooped, but she tried to act like they hadn't. "Nah. Maybe they all thought my awesomeness would overwhelm them, huh? Like, they thought about it, but were too scared or something. Probably the reason I've never been..." A sigh left Dash's lips and she smacked her forehead with her hoof, more out of a feeling of resignation than frustration. "I hate being alone."
Frowning, Fluttershy scooted towards Dash and wrapped her forelegs around the rainbow-maned mare.
This wasn't something Dash expected, and at first appeared to be something she didn't want either.
"What're you...?" She tried squirming out of the impromptu hug for a moment, but quickly gave up. The softness of Fluttershy's coat against hers didn't feel too bad, and she smelled nice. Like a batch of freshly picked strawberries at the farmers' market. Even so, Dash felt the need to get out, "What do you think you're doing, Shy? Ya know I don't like ponies touching me...!"
Fluttershy responded with, "But you know me, don't you? I'm not going to do anything."
"Nothing?" Dash no longer fought the embrace, instead choosing to rest her chin on Fluttershy's shoulder.
"Nope. If you want me to do nothing, then that's what I'll do."
"Well, that's nice and all, but I think I need ya to do something if you're gonna..." A word refused to leave Dash's throat.
"Help you?" Fluttershy said with complete sincerity.
The word made Dash cringe, but she nodded in agreement. "Yeah, that."
Fluttershy loosened her hug on Dash to get a good look at the mare's face, and two stared into each other for a time. Thoughts were racing in both heads, these trains not traveling on entirely separate tracks. After a while, Fluttershy said, "I think you need a sleeping buddy."
Dash's face screwed up at the comment. "A sleeping buddy?"
And yet Fluttershy replied innocently with, "You sleep alone, right? A-and maybe you're tired of that? I know that feeling too. It sometimes hits me pretty hard, but, well, it's hard to talk to friends about these things..." Her cheeks showed an adorable pinkness that bordered on true redness. "Even with friends as amazingly kind as ours."
"So your suggestion is to...?" Dash's eyebrow arched as she asked the question.
"Share the same bed." Fluttershy hovered over to her bed, partially uncovered, and her blush deepened. "It might help you sleep if you had company, and, um..." She rubbed the back of her head nervously. "I c-could do that for you."
Dash eyes her friend skeptically, then the bed, then Fluttershy again. It was such a strange proposition, especially when coming from somepony so introverted. It really did amaze Dash that nopony had asked Fluttershy out, the yellow mare being as naturally beautiful as she was. She didn't try to be pretty so much as she was pretty, and some of their mutual friends quietly resented her for it. Rarity in particular envied Fluttershy's effortless beauty, and yet ironically they were the best of friends. Heck, Dash thought it was crazy that Rarity of all ponies never went after Fluttershy in a romantic way, considering her widely known flings with several mares. Dash envied that as well, she supposed to herself. Rarity's ease with finding partners and Fluttershy's good looks. She had neither.
Shaking her head, Dash got her mind back on track and hovered onto the bed, pressing her hooves into the sheets. "So, uhh, how're we gonna go about this? And if ya pull anything funny—"
"I won't. I was wondering what would be best as well." Fluttershy rubbed her chin in contemplation before landing beside Dash. "Would you like to be big spoon, or little spoon?" At that moment, Fluttershy froze in place. She shoved her hoof in her mouth and nearly died from embarrassment. Her cheeks were burning a fiery red.
Dash noticed this as well, because her expression was one of similar bewilderment. "What...?"
"I was thinking—" wincing— "that we could cuddle, or something along those lines. Close contact would help, I think."
"Shy, I... don't do that sort of thing!" Dash pouted and crossed her forelegs. "I said I don't like—!"
"I know what you said!" To her own surprise, Fluttershy had raised her voice. "I just—!" She took a deep breath and exhaled before trying to said what she wanted. "I just think it would be nice."
"It would be 'nice'?" Dash parroted, almost in a mocking tone.
"Y-yes..." Fluttershy buried her face in her hooves for a moment. "If I got close to you like that. I thought you would trust me enough. So that I could try it without having to say anything."
"Without having to say what, though?" Dash replied in willful denial. Sometimes her mind really was like a black hole, but there were times like this one where she decided to miss the point of what was being said. "If ya gotta tell me something, use words. Don't beat around the bush. I'll admit, I'm not the..." Her own words got caught in her throat, but she forced them out with a harsh whisper. "I'm not the smartest pony ever. Maybe the toughest and fastest, but not the smartest." If Dash was more of a paranoid she would have checked the cabin for wire taps. Her weaknesses had to remain a secret to everypony.
Well, almost everypony.
Tears were forming in Fluttershy's eyes. They threatened to break free. "I didn't want to say it. I'm sorry I've been so quiet about all this." Lying back on the sheets, she rested her head on one of the pillows and stared out at nothing, not wanting to meet Dash's gaze. "I'm sorry I've been such a doormat for so long. I'm sorry I've been afraid to say anything about how I feel. I feel so pathetic, knowing that I could've said what I've been meaning to for a long time, and yet I never did."
Her chest hurting at what Fluttershy was saying, Dash lied down next to her friend, her right wing pressed against the bed. "I think I'm sorry too. About treating you so badly all the time. It's pretty uncool for me to do that. On of the most uncool things I've ever done, and I-I know I won't be able to make up for it. Even for somepony as awesome as me, I don't know if I can—"
Fluttershy's face was being overrun with tears. She kept staring at the ceiling, fearing that turning to face Dash would only make it worse. "And I'm sorry you're too dense to see that I l-love you, Dash..." Her heart sped up, beating fiercely as if trying to escape from her chest.
The outside world ignored Fluttershy's sobs; the crickets continued their nighttime chants. Dash lay still for an eternity, incapable of saying anything, unable to deny herself the knowledge that Fluttershy had wanted to be with her for longer than she could have ever guessed. Ever since they were young fillies in Cloudsdale? Quite possibly, and after all this time there came not a word from the timid mare's lips about how she felt. She suffered through the quagmire of loneliness for years, and the worst part was—so did Dash.
Something could've been done about it.
Something had to be done. Slowly, Dash inched herself closer to Fluttershy before nuzzling her friend's neck. The poor mare had regressed into a practically catatonic state, but Dash tried nevertheless to bring her back to life. Her forelegs embraced Fluttershy's shoulders, and her hind legs snuggled up under her friend's. The result wasn't quite a full-body hug, but it was farther than Dash had gone with anypony. This level of intimacy. This level of closeness. This level of needing somepony.
Eventually, Fluttershy turned on to her side to mirror Dash's position, her cheeks soaked. She sniffled, attempting to hide what could clearly be seen. Her wonderful mane was starting to become disheveled, but Dash didn't mind that.
They had gathered together like penguins for warmth. The blanket wasn't needed. Without speaking, for words couldn't do much for either of them, Dash and Fluttershy stayed close to each other, their muzzles touching for no other reason than that they wanted to touch each other and—at the same time—be touched. The pure act of touching somepony's coat, her skin, her hooves, her face, was what they both desired most in that crystallized moment in time. Their legs intertwined like pieces of a puzzle that were being locked into place.
Aside from her tail flicking about, possessing a mind of its own anyway, Dash didn't move an inch. She didn't feel the need to. Her eyes were growing tired and heavy, and as she stared into Fluttershy's she realized they were doing the same thing.
Indeed it was Fluttershy whose consciousness fell away to a far-off place first, and Dash knew she didn't have much time before she accompanied her... girlfriend? Was Fluttershy her girlfriend? Was she still just a friend? Dash wondered for a time, longer and harder than usual. The word "girlfriend" was foreign to her, and yet a peculiar feeling in her chest informed her that this word was born under a good sign. The word would—maybe, just maybe—become familiar to Dash, and the possibility arose that she would grow to like it. So Dash made a pact with herself, a pact which said that she would think of Fluttershy as her girlfriend. Did she feel this way, though? That Fluttershy was her girlfriend, and that from now on they would share the same bed sometimes? That they would touch each other like they were at this very moment? That they would kiss each other on the lips and reveal secrets about themselves to each other that they would never tell anypony else? That they would try to see each other every day because they couldn't stand the idea of being apart for long?
Would they fight through times of hatred and fury and sadness, just so they wouldn't have to feel so lonely?
Of course they would. And in the seconds before she flew off to the land of slumber, Dash spoke in a tone so hushed as to not let even the crickets know of what she was about to say.
"I love you too, Fluttershy..."
