Nature's Cure

Chapters

Fuck This Job
Fuck This Alarm
Fuck This Mare

Fuck This Job

John wiped another swathe of sweat from his forehead. They could’ve at least told him it’d be this hot in the Everfree Forest, though he supposed he should’ve also blamed himself for neglecting to bring a headband of some kind. I need the money, I need the money, I need the money. He winced as he smacked his forehead into an unseen branch. Again.

“Careful.”

That voice. That God—no, Celestia damned voice. She was so bemused, so impatient, just the same as she’d been the last half-dozen times he’d tripped or run into something.

They’d been on this damned expedition for several days now. John found a smirk amidst the bullshit, dipped in cynicism. This was probably the fucking dream for a lot of guys. An enchanted forest, all female entourage, an important task that only a few were fit to undertake… it was hardly his bag.

He knew several guys who moved to Equestria with the sole intent of finding a hot, single mare and settling down with her, but he couldn’t see the appeal, especially with these four. The mare who reprimanded him like it was her job was apparently famous, or something, going by the name Daring Do. There were books about her, for fuck’s sake. The last thing he wanted was for all of Equestria to read about him portrayed as some kind of annoying poindexter sidekick. Those types were always laughed at, not laughed with.

The light-gold pony reminded him of Steve Irwin, except with a pith helmet and none of his charm or accent. Rather, the sound of her voice made him clench his fists. Maybe not her voice, but its cocky, condescending contents. None of the other mares had spoken to him much over the course of their thus-far uneventful trek through the woods. That was probably for the best.

As soon as he’d signed onto the expedition, they’d met his presence with nothing short of resentment. “Ugh, we have to bring a human along?” one with a bright-orange coat had said. She was the same colour as the leaves in autumn just before they fell from their trees. John had fought not to groan aloud when he’d learned her name was Autumn Leaf. These ponies may be magical, but they were shit at names. Suppose you didn’t have to worry about being creative when your crazy homeworld all but fulfilled that need for you.

But the pay was too good. Apparently, there was some sort of crystal that’d formed deep in the Everfree Forest called Celestite, its potential magical properties making it worth several times its weight in gold, which was precisely the type of expedition that piqued Daring Do’s interest, he’d learned. Between only himself and four ponies, his share would be considerable, so long as he could survive the Everfree Forest.

He didn’t know exactly how much the pay would be, but from what Daring had said, it would be enough to cover food, booze, and lodging for at least two years, which was too good to pass up, considering he scarcely had the funds to sustain himself for two weeks at a time. Nobody told him just how much of a bitch finding a steady job in Equestria was, but then, who had he asked? Given the raw strength of the earth ponies, the flight of the pegasi, and the telekinesis, among other magics, of the unicorns, it made sense in retrospect.

But John had something these pegasi didn’t: knowledge. Autumn Leaf fell into stride with Daring. She showed none of the signs of fatigue or wear from the journey that John did. He had no idea how she and the other ponies managed to look good, day after day, without doing anything more than taking a quick dip in a stream. Sweat and grease had bunched John’s brown hair into strands as thick as fingers that clung to his head, and grime stained his navy-blue t-shirt. Nettles had ripped and torn his blue jeans. Every time he thought about it, he wished he’d been able to afford proper clothing for a journey like this, but, then again, if he had that kind of money, then he wouldn’t need to put himself through this torture.

“So, why is he coming along again, exactly?” Autumn said.

Daring stopped to draw her machete and sever a tangle of ropy vines with three keen cuts. Holding it with her teeth. Ponies were oddly impressive, loathe to admit it or not. “Because we’re after the Celestite crystals. Don’t you think having a geologist tagging along might be at least a little useful?”

“I thought you knew a few things about, well, about that kind of stuff.”

“Yes, I do.” Daring sheathed her machete and led her team through a dense knot of oaks. “But Jimmy here studied geology for years.”

“My name’s John.”

“Whatever. John knows more crystals than us. Yeah, splitting profits isn’t that great, but you know what’d really suck? Getting absolutely nothing because we didn’t gather the Celestite properly.”

Autumn stumbled over a particularly thick root, but a quick swoosh of her wings carried her over it. “How do you fuck up gathering crystals?”

“Lots of ways,” John said, clambering over the root. He heard an annoyed snort from one of the mares behind him, but forced himself to spare her the satisfaction of a reaction. “I’ve never seen Celestite before, and neither have you. What if they’re extra hard? Brittle? What if they’re embedded in something? It’s not like you’re mining coal.”

“And you’re sure this is worth going the whole way on hoof?” another mare asked. John knew her from her scratchy voice and violet coat, but hadn’t bothered to learn her name. “This is taking so much longer than it should. We could just fly until we find the Celestite, then swoop down, pick them up, and boom, one and done, just like that.”

“I’m so sorry I can’t sprout wings and fly like you.” John couldn’t stop himself from getting testy. How could he? It’d been like this ever since they’d left Ponyville, and it’d only gotten worse from day to day. “Hell, do you know how expensive flying is on Earth? If humans could fly like you pegasi, then we’d be able to save so much money. I probably hate walking even more than you do.”

“Yeah, you hate it so much that we have to stop three more times a day,” Daring quipped.

John decided against getting into it again. At the best of times, humans didn’t have anywhere close to the same stamina as a horse, and these ponies seemed to have similar endurance to their less-evolved, less-magical cousins back home. John wasn’t fat—if anything, he’d lost a decent amount of weight since he moved; the Equestrian diet was considerably more healthy than what he was used to on Earth, and meat wasn’t readily available.

It turned out that it was a lot more difficult to justify eating a hamburger when the cows could hold a conversation with you. So, meat generally had to be imported from Earth, and the fees were several times more expensive than John could afford. Even so, he was still out of shape and had a bit of a gut, finding himself often short of breath. He supposed that was for the best, since most of the times he spoke, he found himself emptying his lungs of valuable air that he needed to traverse the Everfree. What good’s intelligence and logic if these nags only get pissed off? Too bad Equestrians didn’t develop common sense along with their speech.

His thoughts were interrupted when he noticed Daring had stopped moving. Ahead was a ravine, like a deep gouge in the land, at least a hundred feet wide. It stretched for kilometres to either side and looked to be quite deep. John couldn’t tell just how far it went down.

Daring sighed. “Well, this normally wouldn’t be a problem.” Her rose glance flicked to him before returning to the canyon. “At least we’ve got a quick way for him to get across.”

“And that is?” John didn’t like heights. “It’ll take a couple of hours to circumvent that. I think the right looks the safest. There’s way too many rocks going the other way, and they don’t look stable enough to support my weight.”

“We could just carry him,” Autumn said. “He’s not too fat, and there’s four of us.”

“Not like that one guy with the ponytail who’s been trying to fuck me,” the violet one said. “It’d take a dozen pegasi to lift that boulder of a human.”

John found himself backed up into a fir before he’d registered moving his legs. “Oh, no. No, no, no. Fuck that. I’m not letting you carry me over that, not in a million years. How do you even grab things with your hooves, anyway? What if you let go?”

“That’d just be so tragic,” said Autumn. “But it’s a risk I’m willing to take.” The others, except Daring, echoed her statement. “Sorry, John, but it’ll only take a few minutes. Nopony wants to spend hours just because you’re scared of flying.”

“Actually,” Daring said, “there’s a rotten tree over there.”

John followed her extended forehoof to an ash that looked on its last legs. He never considered himself an outdoorsy type, but even his untrained eye could tell by the mangy bark and discoloured wood that it looked like the next strong wind would fell it, and it’d have been removed already if the Everfree were tended to.

“We can easily chop it down,” Daring continued. “It should be tall enough for him to walk across.”

John’s eyes bulged. “Are you kidding me? What do I look like, some sort of circus act?”

“Yes.”

“Shut the fuck up, Autumn,” he growled. “I don’t have that type of balance.”

“Then crawl,” Daring said. John could’ve sworn there was a dry amusement beneath her words. “Having to walk the whole way sucks enough as it is. We should get this over with. I’d be down to carry him, but he’s too much of a chicken. If he thrashes and struggles as much as I think he will, then I don’t know if we can hold him. It’s either this branch, or waste the rest of the day, and I’m not spending a minute longer in this forest than I have to. This place is dangerous, and I’m not just talking about the terrain.”

Something about the finality in Daring’s voice stopped John from arguing. For once, he felt like the subordinate she treated him as. “Well, how do you propose to fell the tree, then? Did you even think about that? Even a rotting tree would need a proper tool to chop it down. Those hatchets you’ve brought for chopping firewood won’t do it, and I don’t think you’d want to risk breaking your machetes on it.”

Daring was already approaching the tree, sizing it up. “For someone so smart, you sure can be stupid. Okay, girls, let’s knock this fucker down. Doing this sucks enough already, so let’s get it right.”

The pegasi, with the exception of Violet, flew to the upper portions of the tree’s trunk, while Violet stayed near the ground. John watched them with clenched teeth and folded arms. Violet began striking the ash tree near its base, sending shards of rotten wood and bark flying with each blow from her forehooves.

“Go!” Daring yelled. At her command, she and the others sped toward the tree, hind legs first, and struck it simultaneously. The ash shuddered, but didn’t fall. They pulled back, preparing to hit it again, and Violet chipped away at the tree’s opposite side all the while.

After another three attempts, there was a loud groaning and splintering of wood, and then the tree fell. Be too short, be too short, be too short... If there was a God—or, more likely, Celestia—watching, they didn’t answer his prayers. If it were Celestia, she may as well have taken a shit in a paper bag, lit it on fire, and lobbed it at him.. The tree landed on the other side of the canyon with a great, echoing thud! and it looked like it formed a perfect bridge.

He trudged over with sullen steps through the dirt as the mares hoofbumped mid-air. How irritating.

What choice did he have now? Daring had him pegged quite well. He couldn’t imagine a world where he wouldn’t completely lose his shit if he were to be carried over such a chasm by nothing but a few pegasi. At least half of them would probably ‘accidentally’ let go halfway across.

Daring Do landed beside him and gave him a nudge. “C’mon, Johnny. We don’t have all day.” When John didn’t respond, she said, “Look, if it weren’t for how much we stand to profit from the Celestite, I wouldn’t have brought you along. This forest isn’t like the ones you’re used to wherever you came from. It’s magic, and it’s full of magical creatures—and some pretty fucking scary ones at that.”

“I know,” said John, nearing the tree-bridge. He was impressed by how well they’d managed to fell it, even if it was more of a husk than a tree—but he wasn’t about to let them know that. “If I didn’t need the money, I wouldn’t have come, either.”

When he reached the fallen log, Daring gave his ass a nudge. “Don’t go falling off on me, okay? I don’t exactly like you—”

“Really? Wow, I’d never have thought that.”

“—but I don’t want your blood on my hooves. I’m an explorer, an adventurer—not a murderer,” Daring finished, taking flight.

John felt nauseous. The gash in the land only looked deeper now that he was staring straight down it. But, left with no other choice, he went on all fours and began to crawl along the log. Immediately, he began to regret his decision. Fuck, fuck fuck! Why couldn’t we have taken the long way round? The way the log creaked made his abdomen tighten in turn until the muscles grated, and he couldn’t tell whether the sound was coming from him or the rickety platform below.

By the time he was maybe a quarter of the way along the log, the bark beneath his hand splintered, and he yelled out. Somehow, he’d managed to regain his grip before he completely lost his balance. Were the ponies saying something? He couldn’t tell. The adrenaline and terror pulsing in his brain drowned everything else out.

But he managed to think just enough to adjust his approach. Instead of climbing the log like a thick rope, he’d taken to shimmying along it. His hands were picking up splinters, and his legs probably were, too, but he ignored the pain. At least his jeans were already ruined. All that mattered was crossing the log safely. John clamped his eyes shut; looking longingly at the other side of the chasm didn’t help any. The distance was so great, his pace so slow, that it may as well have been forever.

And then there was a sickening snap.

The world was yanked out from under him as gravity stole him away. He flailed his arms, screaming so loudly he felt like he was tearing his throat out. He didn’t have to be a rocket scientist to know that he had no chance of surviving such a fall, even if the bottom wasn’t covered in jagged rocks—which, knowing his luck, probably was.

Something smashed into his stomach. Hard. It knocked what little air remained in his lungs out in a whoosh. Dazed, he realized he’d stopped falling, and he didn’t feel any pain. What the fuck’s going on? His eyes opened. Daring and the others held onto him and grunted with labour as they carried him up toward the other side of the ravine.

John was too stunned to struggle or say anything at all. He didn’t react when they dumped him unceremoniously on the ground several feet from the edge. Flat on his back, he laid gasping for air. The sky spun as primal emotions collided with his brain. Finally, things sat still. He blinked slowly, finding Daring looking down at him.

“You all right?” she asked.

John sat up. If it hadn’t been so long since he’d last eaten, he’d have probably barfed. “No.”

“Nothing’s broken, right?”

John shook his head. “Next time, we go around. I don’t give a fuck how much longer it’ll take.”

“Hey,” Autumn said, “at least you didn’t struggle.”

Wonder if she’d struggle if he snapped her neck.

...whoa, where did that come from?

John doesn’t like heights, or Autumn. It’s established.

The ponies didn’t have time for your grouchy-bordering-maniacal thoughts. They were already pressing forwards into the tangled mass of trees ahead, their canopies so thick, they cast the terrain beneath into shadow. John forced himself to stand, stumbling as he half-ran in order to catch up. He knew they wouldn’t really leave him behind, but after nearly letting him plummet to his death, he could only trust them so much.

When he’d fallen into step with Daring, she said, “As close as that was, that was also the easiest time I’ve had working with you so far. You should get scared shitless more often.”

“Shove it up your ass,” John said. “Well, if you can find space next to the stick you’ve got buried up there already.”

“That’s such a nice way to talk to the pony who just saved your life.” Daring took off, flying a few feet above his head and peering into the gloom ahead. “After this is all said and done, I hope you take up trying to steal precious ancient artefacts and using them for evil. That way, I could kick your ass and not feel the least bit bad about it.” A glance back. “And I’ll have you know, I’d rather shove anything up my tailhole than go diving after you again.”

With fatigue from the day’s arduous trek and his near-death experience catching up with him, John decided to do nothing more than flip her off behind her back, but her words still rang in his mind, a repetitive chime. He grinned at the irony of flipping the bird to a creature that was essentially part-bird, and wondered in equal part whether she noticed where his eyes travelled the moment she said that last bit. Turns out the adrenaline of near-death heightens your libido a little.

Or maybe he was just a little grateful he wasn’t timberwolf food right now, and it was her fine patootie that saved him. John tried to shrug it off, but his shoulders ached too much. His limbs felt like lead as he trudged deeper and deeper into the Everfree.

Because of how dense it was, he had no way to tell if it was dawn or dusk, sunrise or sunset. All he could do was hope the ponies, with their seemingly limitless stamina, would decide to call it a day sooner rather than later.

Didn’t help that he—being at the back—was subject to an endless procession of mare ass as they walked. Specifically Daring’s, whose tail had a tendency to flick from side to side, though never enough to actually reveal anything. She probably realised what she was doing, too. That or badass, sarcastic, condescending explorers really didn’t care who got a glimpse of their ass shaking.

Either way, it made his walk twice as stiff as usual.

His satchel, despite being lightly packed, felt like a sack of stones on his back. Aside from a tent that was much too small for him, he’d brought little more than a bunch of salted granola bars from Sugarcube Corner, and those were already half-gone. Since they hadn’t reached their destination, wherever it was, he was reluctant to eat more of them, instead trying to restrict his meals to the berries they found nearby.

Finally, at long last, Daring declared it was time to make camp for the night. Immediately, John allowed his legs to buckle. He collapsed, too exhausted to massage his aching limbs. I fucking hope they don’t check for the sunrise, what with how thick the canopy is. Sleeping in for once would be so, so nice. It took some time for feeling to return to his legs.

It didn’t take him long to set his tent up, considering how small it was. As was usual for this trip, his dinner consisted mostly of berries. However, Daring had managed to scrounge up some mushrooms.

“Are you sure those are safe?” John asked. “I’ve read a bit about mushrooms, and I don’t know anything about these. They could make me seriously trip, or worse.”

“They’re fine.” Daring rinsed them in a nearby stream and put them in a little copper pan from her saddlebags. “Considering what I’ve had to survive on, I know how to spot the bad shrooms, and these aren’t bad.”

“Are you sure?” John eyed the fungi sceptically. They looked like shrivelled brains.

“Oh, yes, as long as they’re cooked properly,” Daring said. “See, if you cook this kind of mushroom wrong, or eat it raw, you’re as good as dead. But they’re actually delicious if you get the right sear on ‘em. I was hoping we’d find some of these; the spice I brought goes really well with them.”

John’s eyes bulged as he stared at the brain-like fungi. While Daring spoke, the other pegasi began building a fire. “Think you could try them first?”

“You don’t trust me?” Daring arched an eyebrow. “John, I saved your life. I know you’re not happy that you came along, but know that I’m not too happy that I had to bring you on the expedition, either. I thought humans had brains to make up for not having wings or magic, but you’ve just been an extra saddlebag the entire time.”

John clenched and unclenched his fists. “Yeah, we do. We have this little thing called technology that’s a result of said brains.”

“Where is it?” Daring cast a patronizing glance around them. “I don’t see anything but nature. So what you’re telling me is that your kind’s pretty useless when they don’t have access to it, huh? Are all humans like you? Do they all rely on technology so much that they’ve grown weaker and weaker without being able to use it as a crutch?”

“We’re not all like that.” John’s tone was sullen. “Some humans are great at roughing it… but I’m not.”

“Doesn’t take a genius to figure that out.”

The fire began to crackle and pop behind them. Daring gave John one last eye roll before she tended to the mushrooms. They actually smelled rather appetising once Daring added the spices, manoeuvring the pot around the fire with her oddly dexterous hooves.

He still waited until everyone else had had a taste before finally throwing caution to the wind.

The flavour was unlike anything he’d experienced. It was hot enough to bring a bead of sweat to his forehead, and he thought he could taste garlic, curry, and oregano on his tongue, as well as several other flavours he couldn’t place. He found himself surprisingly full, largely thanks to the mushrooms. Somehow, he didn’t feel like death either, so that was a plus.

When John finished pegging his tent into the the Everfree’s fertile soil, he caught himself taking sidelong glances at the mares, hoping they wouldn’t notice. He’d been in their company for days now, not even having a moment of privacy, and it was beginning to grate on him more than a little. It wasn’t like he was exceptionally bothered about his privacy, or anything, but with the scene from earlier playing over in his mind, the shake of his reluctant saviour’s ass and the cut of her sass only proving to turn him on more, he began to realise that he hadn’t even had a chance to do that in days.

Before now, he hadn’t even found ponies attractive. Sure, their pastel coats made them pleasant to look at, and their hair—or manes, rather—gave them an alien though hardly unappealing aesthetic. But he’d always thought of them as cute before now, or even cute-slash-annoying, rather than sexy, and much of that cuteness had left his opinion of them after talking with Daring for more than five minutes.

Now, however, his balls were getting bluer than the Celestite crystals they were seeking, and he couldn’t help but wondering what it’d be like to peg one of the mares as he pegged his tent. Daring’s got such a tight-ass, and she knows it. She must have been teasing him earlier, there’s no way she wasn’t trying to turn him on. None.

Well, she’d succeeded. Try not to think about it too much.

He made his way to the bushes. Staying hydrated was mandatory on a journey like this, and he always made sure to drain his canteen regularly—especially when they happened upon a stream or brook.

But that meant he often had to piss like a racehorse. Fitting, considering his situation. He’d holding it for fucking ages, and it didn’t help that he had to engage in the awkward act of trying to piss with a semi, but at least he couldn’t miss the bowl in this case, considering the bowl was nature. When he’d finished and his dick was finally soft again, his steps were more of a swagger than a walk. He re-entered the camp to a hail of laughter that made him instinctively look down.

Fuck. Oh, fuck.

He’d forgotten to zip his fly back up. Or, for that matter, put his dick back in his pants. In one swift motion, so fast he surprised even himself with the sheer speed, he fixed the problem, but the damage was more than done.

“Are all humans that size?” Violet said, barely able to contain her laughter.

John stared intently at the ground as he made the short walk to his tent—all of a half-dozen paces—but the disparaging comments that rained down on him made it feel like an eternity. He could feel the heat on his face.

“My hubby’s like three times bigger than that when he’s not even hard.” He recognized that voice as Autumn’s. “This explains so, so much.”

“It’s not necessarily the size that counts,” Daring said, her tone no less mocking than the others’. “I guess humans are just built that way.”

“I guess so.”

John stopped listening to them. He retrieved the earplugs from his satchel and jammed them in his ears. Sleep couldn’t come soon enough.

Fuck This Alarm

By now, John was used to being woken up before he was ready, but not like this.

The calm reverie of near-unconsciousness was shattered in an instant. Feminine screams, undergrowth stirring, branches snapping, and the scrabble of hooves were all tossed in a blender inside his head. Looked like it was time to deal with another day of—

He then heard the distinct sound of a lion’s roar. Okay. Decidedly not a usual day on the job.

John didn’t have time to rub the sleep from his eyes. He jolted upright with a thrash of his arms. It was pitch-dark out, but he still had no way of knowing what time it was due to the thickness of the canopy overhead. There was another roar, followed by a brutal Thud! from right beside him. He yelped and instinctively threw himself in the opposite direction. He landed on something soft.

“OW!”

Something soft and annoying. “Violet?” he said.

“For fuck’s sake, my name is—”

“Shut the fuck up and run!” Daring yelled.

Couldn’t argue with that. Arms blindly outstretched and fishing for some purchase or understanding of his surroundings, John bolted as fast as he could, stumbling every few steps. More roars came from behind him, followed by the thundering of massive paws. Whatever it was that’d ambushed them was big, and it didn’t seem playful. One set of hooves mixed in with the sound of the creature’s movements.

A stray branch of vine caught John in the shin and sent him sprawling. “No—please!”

There was the striking of a match immediately followed by a plume of flame from beside him. Daring Do grasped a torch in her teeth. “Cmm nn!” she said, holding out a foreleg.

John took it and picked himself up. Their surroundings looked like something out of a horror movie, and he half-expected to see Jason jump out of the nearest thicket any second from now.

As they ran, obstacles leapt at them from the darkness. Reflexes John didn’t know he had saved him from another fall as he and Daring weaved through the trees, forced their way through bushes and brambles, and somehow kept their footing over a trail of mossy rocks.

With the sounds of pursuit growing no fainter, John looked behind him. That’s the thing you’re always told not to do, and now he saw why. The beast advancing on them had a scarlet lion’s mane, leathery wings, forepaws with claws the size of scimitars protruding, and a boatload of other features that John might have taken better note of if he wasn’t running for his life. He was fairly certain that if the forest was any less dense, it’d have caught up and shredded them by now.

Indeed, the creature had difficulty navigating the treacherous Everfree—a great deal more than John and Daring. John sidestepped a tree about twice as thick as his arm, and seconds later, the manticore—as he was almost certain it was—smashed through it. Each time something like this happened, John could tell from quick backward glances that he and Daring were distancing themselves from it, little by little, but John knew it couldn’t last forever.

If the creature had anything like a pony’s stamina, John would tire far before it would. He couldn’t see much ahead. Frustration grew in what little part of his brain that he had left for conscious thought, since most of his energy was going into keeping himself breathing. He needed a plan—but what?

His legs burnt almost as much as his lungs. His head pounded. However long he’d slept, it was nowhere near enough, and even less than he’d gotten used to over the last few days. Daring kept a few steps ahead, but somehow, she didn’t completely outrun him. Was she holding herself back so she didn’t abandon him?

John’s eyes frantically scanned his surroundings. Some of the trees had given way to rocks, something else to avoid. Rocks also meant something else: there was a good chance that there’d be fewer trees in the distance, and any little chance he had of survival would drop to zero if the manticore had an open field to run them down on.

Then, a blackness in the rocks caught his eye, something the flickering light from Daring’s torch couldn’t penetrate. A cave! Without hesitation, he turned and made a break for it.

“Jnn! Wht th fwk are uu dwng?”

All John could manage from his air-starved lungs was, “Only chance!”

He dove in, and the only tell that Daring was still behind him was the light that followed. Please thin out, please thin out... He blindly rushed through the cave with Daring at his heel. But, so far, it was large, and the echoing roar from behind told him that the manticore could fit. Fuck. Instead of getting him and Daring to safety, had he led them to their deaths?

The cave forked, and he took a hard right. He had no idea how the manticore hadn’t caught up with them yet, but he didn’t dare look back. Not now. The cave refused to narrow as his feet pelted against the rock, and it didn’t appear to be changing whatsoever. If they didn’t find somewhere tight to squeeze soon—

Suddenly, there was no floor. The dropping in his stomach felt exactly the same as when the log had snapped yesterday. He desperately tried to cling to something—anything—but the rock his hand found was slick and damp, and he immediately lost his grip.

Daring’s scream joined chorus with his as she, too, fell.

The torch fell past him. While the cave leading straight down was certainly narrower than the one they’d be running through—far too narrow for a manticore—he quickly saw what awaited at the bottom. Jagged rocks. Always the fucking jagged rocks. Now that death rushed up to meet him, or, rather, gravity pulled him into death’s welcoming embrace, he didn’t know what to think or what to feel. There was nothing he could do.

“Never in a cave!”

John couldn’t say what happened next. It was like one of those shitty home movies shot in bad lighting with a shaky phone camera. Bits and pieces of things—pony, rock, vest, wing, hoof, pith helmet, rock again, and then nothing, as the torch went out—all flashed in his eyes. As he fell, something hit his chest, and he felt the odd grab and tug on his clothes, and then something on his back.

He wouldn’t know it now, but apparently it was a point amongst hardened adventurers and explorers alike not to die in caves.

But right then, everything hurt all at once. A sickening CRACK! came at the exact same time that his lungs decided to deflate.

Then, silence.

Everything had stopped completely, except apparently his heartbeat. There was a faint ice-blue glow in the distance. Then the groaning started. He realized he was lying on top of Daring Do. “Holy fucking shit,” he said. “Daring… y-you saved me!”

“You’re welcome.” Pain permeated Daring’s voice. “Now could you…?”

John rolled over. Everything ached like a bitch, but at least he wasn’t dead. “Are you all right?”

“No.”

Neither of them could see, and so they made their way toward the strange glow up ahead. As they walked, the air grew hot. On the plus side, John didn’t have his heavy satchel weighing him down. On the negative… he didn’t have his satchel. All he had were his torn, sweaty, and grimy clothes.

“Oh. Oh, Jesus...!”

He didn’t even care about the source of the light when it grew bright enough to get a good look at Daring. Her left wing looked like it’d been run over by a dump truck. It stuck out at an odd angle, its feathers either missing or pointing in the wrong direction. Agony wracked Daring’s face, and he couldn’t imagine how she felt. As a kid, he’d fractured his arm on the monkey bars when he was in fourth grade, and that hurt. But completely shattering a wing?

“Stupid, stupid,” Daring grunted, half-limping toward the light.

“You shouldn’t walk,” John said. “You need rest—medicine, a doctor, something!”

“Are you a doctor?” Daring snapped. “Got any medicine?” A beat. Pained silence. “Okay, well, we’re going forwards. It’s that or die down here, and this isn’t the first time I’ve damaged a wing… but this is definitely the worst.”

John stopped. “Daring, I… I’m sorry.”

“So am I.”

“No, really, I am.” John always considered himself well-spoken, but the words were clumsy in his mouth, and he couldn’t blame the residual adrenaline from what’d just happened. “I know I’ve been kind of a bitch, and I’ve slowed you down, maybe even gotten the others killed… and you saved me.”

“It’s not that,” Daring said. “It’s… never mind. I don’t know where the others are, but I think they got somewhere safe, since we led that manticore halfway around the Everfree by the time we lost it. At the end of the day, it wasn’t your fault we got attacked by that thing, and you probably saved us, at least for now.”

John felt relieved and confused. Hearing Daring speak to him like this, when she wasn’t jumping down his throat, was just weird. “That’s all I could think of. If we’d gotten out in the open, you could’ve flown away, but I was dead for sure. Here, well, he can’t chase us down here.” He paused, and a terrifying thought struck him. “Manticores can’t tunnel through solid rock, can they?”

“They can do a lot of shit, but not that.”

“Thank fuck for that,” John said.

Daring grunted and trudged onward. “We’d better keep moving. We’re not doing anypony any favours by standing here.”

He knew Daring was right, and they set off together. The cave was just wide enough for them to walk abreast, and was only a few inches above the top of his head. The light grew stronger, and now that the danger had passed—at least for the moment—John had time to take in his surroundings.

Bioluminescent fungi dotted the walls and ceiling, growing denser the farther they ventured. They were shaped like the average run of the mill mushrooms you might find at your grocery store, except their caps were less rounded, and the fungus itself was ice-blue, almost ghostly in appearance.

The glow was pleasant, soothing. John wiped the sweat from his forehead. Why’s it so humid down here? The air grew hotter and thicker as they progressed through the network of tunnels, taking a left, a left, another left, then a right, and then another left. It felt like they’d been down there for hours.

The sound of gushing water met their ears. They made an unspoken agreement to follow the noise. John had no way of knowing if it would lead them to the exit, but fresh water would at least give them a better chance of survival down here. When they crossed a threshold, they let out a collective gasp.

John rubbed his eyes, not believing what he saw. “What is this place?”

Daring only shook her head. A vast cavern sprawled before them. The air was full of steam that rose from the water pooling in the multi-tiered layers of rock all around the chamber. Several passages connected to it, and the water flowed from the walls in a steady, but mild current. That same fungi that’d led them here grew on the walls and ceiling, lighting the place up just as well as the midday sun might’ve.

These underground springs looked like something out of a tourism video, except completely untouched by anyone, pony or human. The way the rock was tiered reminded John of steps, except there was no logical pattern to them, and the water rested in what looked like several sizable indents that were essentially nature’s hot tubs.

“Fuck, my wing.”

Shit. He’d forgotten about that. Thinking fast, John looked around for something that might help. Moss and lichen covered much of the rocky cavern floor, as well as several patches of thick, wet mud. “I have an idea.” When she looked at him sceptically, he said, “Come on. At least let me try it. I ate your death mushrooms, didn’t I?”

Daring sighed, following him down the slope and into the springs. The going was slow, partly because of how treacherous the terrain was, and partly because the last thing John wanted to do after all that running for his life was exert himself more. When they reached the hot springs themselves, John sat down between patches of mud and moss.

Even though his shoes were pretty much destroyed, he kicked them off and set them aside before dipping his bare feet into the pool. A wave of relief washed over him. He’d forgotten just how soothing something like this could be.

Daring stood over him, grimacing from the pain. She hardly looked impressed. “How’s this helping my wing?”

“It’s not, but I’m getting to that.” With how rife with magic not just Equestria, but the Everfree Forest was, he wondered if some of that magic was seeping through his skin right now, or if the serenity he was feeling was just a placebo. It didn’t matter. “This water is so nice, Daring. You should rest your legs in it while I look at your wing.”

Shrugging, Daring sat beside him and did as he suggested. Immediately, some of the pain was gone from her face. Maybe this water did have a little magic in it. He had to stop enjoying himself. The mare who had just saved his life—twice—was suffering, and suffering because of him. He had to help. Taking a deep breath, he delicately began to touch the destroyed wing.

“Ouch! What are you doing?”

She didn’t pull away. Was it trust, or was she in too much pain? Hoping it was the former, John began to unfasten the buttons on Daring’s vest. “I have an idea, but we need to get you out of that first.”

Daring nodded and let him undress her. Her vest only had a half-dozen buttons, but unfastening them took much longer than it should’ve. John wasn’t sure why he was struggling. Ponies normally went around naked, and it wasn’t like he was about to get her non-existent tits out, so why was he so nervous about ‘stripping’ her?

His breathing grew ragged as the last button came undone, and the vest parted. He was surprised to see that her chest rose and fell irregularly. Could it be that—? No. It had to be from the pain. That was it.

John helped her finish undressing. She removed her forelegs from the arm holes mostly by herself, but allowed him to pull the sleeves off.

Her working wing fit through the slit on the vest’s side easily enough, but they both knew the broken one wouldn’t be as simple. John gently placed one hand on her barrel while he eased the vest off, trying to make it move around the wing as opposed to folding the wing so it’d slip off. Even still, he was finding it difficult to thread her wing through, what with its haphazard placement. “I’m going to rip your shirt a little. Do you mind?”

A bitter laugh. “I’ve got thirty more of these at home.”

And that settled it. He tore at the slit until it was large enough to thread her wing through with little difficulty, and did his best to ignore the fact that he’d just ripped Daring’s shirt off.

She felt so supple between his hands. It wasn’t anywhere near important right now, but it hardly stopped him noticing.

John knew pony girls definitely had the curves going on where they needed to be, but he had no idea they’d feel this nice. He could feel a heat on his face that most certainly wasn’t because of the hot springs. He couldn’t tell if all the mares were like Daring, or if it was due to her exceptional athleticism, but every inch of her spoke of vigour. Honestly, John didn’t know what the ideal Equestrian body was meant to look like, but somehow, he felt that Daring’s was just that.

After setting her now-torn vest on top of his shoes, he slowly, gradually bent the wing back to a natural, folded position. “I’ve seen a few videos about this,” he said, keeping his voice low and calm. He could feel Daring shivering and wincing in his touch. “Quick and dirty ways to mend a bird wing.”

Daring shot him a glare. “Do I look like a bird?”

John refrained from snarking. It was actually easier than usual. “I’m banking on pegasus wings being similar enough that the same method will hold you over until we can get you a real doctor. Sorry if this hurts—I’m being as gentle as I can.”

Daring didn’t respond. Her eyes were fixated on the water, and she took deep, steady breaths. With his face screwed up in concentration, John set about the meticulous task of adjusting her wing. Being careful not to force anything, he guided it back to where it should be, then straightened her plumage, feather by feather. Occasionally, Daring would curse wordlessly, but she didn’t try to stop him.

He couldn’t say how long it took for him to finish moving the wing, but when he was finally done, he tore a large strip of moss from the ground. He set it aside and scooped up some mud. It felt like just the right consistency, and he applied it to the wing and her barrel like a balm. Daring didn’t watch him work, and when he glanced at her, he could see a deep blue refraction in her ruby eyes, but little tears. She was so tough, it was impossible not to admire. Trying not to feel pressure—it was a pony’s wellbeing at stake, after all—he began applying the mossy strip to her side.

It wasn’t a proper sling or bandage, but it’d have to do, since neither of them had taken any of their supplies from the camp when the manticore attacked. His hands trembled throughout the whole process, despite his constant efforts to steady them. He hoped Daring didn’t notice his nerves. If she’d found out he was less confident about this whole thing than she was, she’d never let him finish.

Sweat covered his forehead, and he wasn’t sure whether it was the heat from the water or sheer nerves. Too focused on the task at hand, he didn’t have time to wipe it away. Finally, after a long, long time, he was done. He sighed with relief and took a moment to admire his work.

Daring looked strange with the makeshift bandage wrapped around her. After he rinsed his hands in the water, he asked, “So… how does it feel?”

“Mmm,” Daring said, rolling her neck. “A lot better. Still hurts like a bitch, but I think I’ll live so long as the bandage holds.” She turned to look at him, a genuine smile on her muzzle. “Thanks.”

John smiled back. “No problem. It was the least I could do.” He got up and pondered removing his shirt. They were all alone here but… there was no curtain or anything.

Now that the crisis had been averted, at least for now, he wanted nothing more than to have a bath. If the hot springs’ water felt that good on him when he wasn’t even knee-deep in it, he could only imagine what it’d make him feel if he could take a proper dip. “Do… do you mind if I?”

“You what?” She sounded curious.

“I… I want to take a bath.”

“So, take one? Nopony’s stopping you.” For once, Daring looked in no particular rush to get a move on. That, and her eyes were trained on him.

John couldn’t believe he was about to have this conversation. “Well, I know you ponies don’t wear too many clothes. But humans, well, uh… you know, we usually don’t go around naked.”

Daring only arched an eyebrow at him. Was she feigning ignorance? “WhatImeanwas,” John stammered, the words tumbling out of his mouth. “I’ll keep my underwear on. I just thought it’d be polite to ask, is all.”

When Daring didn’t say anything for several seconds, John turned and took his shirt off. Why’s she just staring? He tried to be as casual as possible when removing his half-tattered jeans, all too aware of the soft, bright eyes that never left him. Both garments went on top of his shoes, and he dipped into the water.

Everything that troubled him melted away then. He didn’t know how to describe how relaxing it felt. Therapeutic didn’t come anywhere close. As he lounged in the spring, his back against the rock, he felt a foreleg draping over his left shoulder and resting on his chest. It was wet, but still soft as ever.

“D-Daring?” He looked at her.

She was still smiling. “I was wrong about you.”

“You’re not worried that we won’t be able to get out of—”

Daring pressed her forehoof into his mouth. “We’re all alone down here, and I’ve been thinking.”

“About what?”

“Well…” Daring sidled closer. “You surprise me, John. I thought you were just a liability—I really did—and that bringing you along was absolutely necessary. If the Celestite crystals weren’t so valuable, I wouldn’t have felt it was worth the risk or the extra time it’d take. But I’m glad you’re here.”

Was she snuggling against him? Her neck was definitely rubbing against his. He’d never been nuzzled before, but he returned the gesture without thought. “Daring, I—”

“Who knows? If we’d gone around that canyon like you wanted, we might’ve avoided that manticore’s territory,” she said. “I mean, we’d have avoided it if we’d just been able to fly, but after what happened, I can’t help but know none of us will be able to extract the Celestite without your help.”

Without meaning to, John snaked an arm around her. She was so warm, so inviting to his touch. “But, your wing…”

“It’ll heal,” Daring said. “I’ve hurt it before. Pegasus wing bones are very good at knitting, and you treated it damn well. You’re no doctor, but you’re way better than anything I could’ve done. Honestly, I’m impressed.”

“It’s not that difficult of a procedure.”

Daring shook her head. John could feel her breath on his cheek, and he turned to meet her gaze. Her eyes were full of sincerity, and her snout inches from his mouth. “Not about that. It was how gentle you were. You really care, even after the way all of us treated you. Those three ponies work for me, and instead of making them shut up, I just let them rip on you the whole time. I probably wouldn’t have been so gentle if I’d been treated like that for a week.”

John didn’t know what to think. Everything that’d happened just didn’t matter in this cavern, as if it was some completely separate dimension to Earth or Equestria. Even when she put it that way, he couldn’t imagine being so petty.“It’s just basic decency. You know—”

But he couldn’t say anything more. Her lips met his, and the next thing he knew, they were kissing. His arms were around her, and her forelegs around him. They pulled themselves into one another, their tongues meeting and entwining. Her breath brushed his cheek, and he could hear her whimpering from the soft touch of his tongue.

The sensation of making out with a mare was practically the same as doing it with a human woman. He groped her smooth curves, feeling toned, defined muscles beneath her fur. Daring’s coat felt odd on his fingertips. It was incredibly fine, so much so that it was almost like skin. The gentleness of her hooves against his body was amazing, nothing like he would’ve expected.

Eventually, they came up for air. Both of them were panting lightly. Whether it was from the sudden passion they’d shared, the heat of the cave, or both, John didn’t know. He didn’t care, either. He grinned at her like an idiot, and she mirrored his expression.

“What are humans like down there?” she asked.

John thought back to the previous night, where all the mares had laughed at him, and suddenly, he couldn’t bring himself to give a shit. “What are pony girls like down there?”

“Wanna find out?” they both said at the same time. They looked at one another for a few seconds, then laughed.

John rose from the water and found himself kissing her again. He knew she couldn’t submerge herself like he did, otherwise the bandage would come off. His hands explored the top half of her body, gently groping her everywhere. He shuddered as she leaned into him, her hooves caressing him, slowly moving down his belly.

He was already hard before Daring even began to remove his underwear. The band caught on his cock, and it took her a few seconds to get the underwear off it. When she finished she pulled away from him. A single strand of drool connected them for but a moment. Her eyes followed it down until they stopped on his manhood.

“I know it’s not quite what you’re used—” But John couldn’t say anything more.

Daring went down on him, taking his entire length in her mouth, her muzzle pressing against his crotch. A huge wave of pleasure shot through him, unexpected yet more than pleasant, encompassing the entirety of his cock.. She could suck dick, and she could suck dick good. It was now he realized that her tongue was longer, broader, and more flexible than a human’s. It stroked and wrapped around his shaft, pulling back and forth at the tip even as she continued to suckle on him..

Who knew paralysis by pleasure was a thing?. When Daring began to bob her head, the sounds of her attentive muzzle’s work echoing throughout the cavern, John closed his eyes and moaned from ecstasy. He placed his hands on her head, caressing her ears and mane. His cock pulsed inside her mouth, and he began to rock his hips as her bobbing picked up speed.

Occasionally, his legs would shake from a powerful wave of pleasure, and he’d grunt to try to keep himself together. I have no idea how long stallions last, and I don’t care. I just don’t want this to end. It’s so fucking good! He didn’t trust himself to speak. Instead, he put all his concentration in making himself last. Having no opportunity to jack off in nearly a week didn’t help.

When he felt ready to explode, he stammered, “Unf… D-Daring, I’m gonna cum!”

But Daring pulled her head back and licked her lips. “Not right now, you’re not.”

Thoughts came in disjointed fragments, nothing could breach through his high.. He felt so hard, it was almost unbearable. Precum mixed with her saliva on the head of his cock. “It’s just too good. I have to cum!”

He reached for his dick. One way or another, he had to finish himself off, but Daring batted his hands away. “You will,” she said, “but first, you need to give me what I want.”

Hoping he already knew the answer, John tried to make his voice sound coy. “Well, what do you want?”

Daring made a show of turning around until her shapely ass was right in his face. There was a lot of moisture there, and there’s no way it was just sweat. Her tail was to the side, and she presented her asshole and pussy, the latter of which quivered and dripped. “I want that thing inside me, right here, right now.”

It all seemed to happen so fast—John’s hands were shaking.. But it was not from nervousness. It was from excitement, from anticipation. Daring shuffled backwards until her hind legs dropped into the pool, and her rear was level with his cock. Wow, I don’t even have to work at this! John placed his trembling hands on her ass. It was so rounded, so shapely. He squeezed. It had just the right amount of give, and just the right amount of resistance. “Do you like that?”

A moan was all he needed to her. He smeared his cock head against her lower lips, still reddened from the sucking it’d received. “N-no,” Daring said. “Not there.”

John couldn’t stop himself from laughing. “When I was making the comments about shoving something up your ass, I wasn’t—”

“I’m not joking, either.” She sounded pleading, desperate.

“Well, I’m not about to look a gift-horse in the mouth…”

“Good,” Daring said. “Fuck her in the ass instead.”

John felt like he’d been zapped. What he felt now he could only describe as animalistic. After he rubbed his cock against her pussy, just enough to apply some all-natural, fresh from the honeypot lube, he pressed his cock head against Daring’s puckering asshole. He grabbed her round ass harder and forced himself inside.

I’ve heard of a tight fit, but holyfuck. If he thought his nerves were on fire from the blowjob, then this was something else entirely. Daring’s ass grasped him like a vacuum, almost airtight. John clenched his teeth while his fingers whitened from gripping her ample ass so hard.

Slowly, centimetre by centimetre, he forced himself inside. Daring moaned, louder and louder, and shook from the shockwaves of pleasure crashing into her. John had no idea how he hadn’t blown his load—especially after he hilted inside her. “Y-yes,” she said. “It’s sooo good… I can’t even feel my broken wing anymore!”

John’s hands crept up her curves until they reached the part of her barrel where it blossomed out into her onion butt. There was a time where he’d thought it was just a stupid expression, but Daring’s ass was so fine, it really did bring a tear to his eye. With his hands firmly on her hips, he started to move. His movements were gentle at first, only a few inches.

Daring was still so tight around him that he could barely move back and forth. He could feel every detail of her ass with his member as he moved. The way her barrel and neck arched told him she was enjoying this just much as he was—if not even more.

“Yes, yes—YES!” she screamed, her voice echoing off the walls. She shuddered violently, and John didn’t need to look down to realize that she’d came, and came hard.

As she trembled with his cock lodged all the way inside her, so tightly that there was no way he could move it, he brought his hand down on her ass full-force. The spank only made her scream louder, and he could see the ripples of her hide from the blow. Because she was covered in fur and not skin, it wouldn’t even leave a mark. There was something about being able to spank her nice and hard without her little numpties being any the wiser that just tickled him.

Finally, as her orgasm subsided, Daring panted heavily. John could feel her loosen ever so slightly. It was all he needed. He began rutting her, and rutting her good. Maybe there was some athleticism in him after all, because the way his hips pistoned back and forth amazed even him.

“Give it to me!” she shouted. Her legs trembled.

John grabbed her hips once again, admiring her thighs as he kept fucking her. Each time he thrust, he could feel the pleasure building inside him, churning and boiling in the pits of his gut. All Daring could do was bounce that luscious ass up and down slightly but rapidly as he kept ploughing her.

He could see her forehooves digging into the mossy rock. Daring was such a strong pony, and seeing her letting herself be in such a vulnerable state where all she could do was hold on for dear life as John fucked her senseless was just so damn hot to him. There was a wet slapping sound each time he hilted inside her.

The thrusts became erratic as he felt himself getting close. Pleasure clouded his brain, making his whole body tingle. Daring didn’t do or say anything to stop him, and he wouldn’t stop even if she tried. Making him edge earlier only made him feel even more pent-up.

With a wordless grunt, he leaned forward, careful to avoid her broken wing, and placed his hands near her shoulders. His fingers dug into the rock as he thrust his hips forward one last time and came. He closed his eyes as his climax made his entire body tremble. Several thick, sticky shots of cum exploded deep inside Daring, and she tightened around him.

John’s chest heaved as Daring’s incredibly tight asshole milked every drop of cum from his cock that throbbed and pulsed from the pleasure that seared hotter than the water he stood in. Relieved at last, he slumped forward, his cock falling from his lover’s ravaged asshole. A thin stream of his seed trickled from it, and he saw both her holes quiver from the residual pleasure.

“That… was incredible,” he said.

Daring was still flat on her belly, too spent to move. “You were incredible. I’ve never had an orgasm like that—never mind two. Fuck, man.”

“What’s wrong? Was it something I did?” John said. He clambered out of the water until only his feet remained in it and lay down on his back beside her.

She placed her hoof in his hand and gave him a dopey, half-lidded smile. “No, John. I’m just pissed we didn’t do this sooner. Think about it. This is what, day six? That’s five nights where we could’ve fucked like animals.”

Fuck This Mare

John and Daring Do emerged from the caverns to the bright midday sun. They were near the top of a hill, and he could see the Everfree stretching in front of them. His legs were sore as they were since the start of the expedition, but at least now, they were sore for all the right reasons.

“We made it!” Daring said.

John high-fived her wing. “Only because you were able to move that boulder. No way could I have done that on my own.”

The cool breeze stirred Daring’s mane. Although she’d cleaned up very well in the hot springs yesterday, she still looked quite banged up. Her pith helmet was gone, and her grimy vest was torn in several places, but her smile more than made up for it. “Hey, don’t give me all the credit. If it weren’t for you, we’d have taken a lot longer to find the right path.”

“Being a geologist pays off when you’re in caverns,” John said casually. A couple days ago, he’d have said this in the most gloating, sardonic way possible, but with Daring, he saw no need. “But, you know, all that knowledge wouldn’t have meant jack shit if you weren’t around. Who knows how long it’d have taken us to get out if you weren’t able to move that boulder.”

“Wait until the others hear about what happened.” Daring led the way down the hill, back into the forest. It looked much less oppressive and unpleasant than it did twenty-four hours ago.

John shot her a cheeky grin. “‘Hear about what happened?’ All of it?”

Daring stopped to give him a playful nudge. “Not all of it.” She winked. “As funny as it’d be to see their faces when they hear how amazing of a fuck you are, I think it’s better that it’s our little secret—at least for now.”

Last night replayed vividly in John’s mind. He felt a familiar twinge in his crotch as he remembered Daring spreading for him. “That’s fine with me. Who cares what those cunts think? All that matters is we’ve got each other.”

The two of them made their way through the forest. “You know, it doesn’t matter if you’ve got a fifteen-inch dick if you can’t use it right.”

“They’re typically that big? I shouldn’t be surprised, but wow, way to make me feel inadequate down there.”

Without her machete, Daring had to resort on going around the undergrowth or using her teeth to snap smaller vines. “I was complimenting you, dumb ass. Maybe you’re not all brains after all.”

“I guess. Fuck, that really was amazing,” John said.

“It was.”

“Oh, how’s your wing?” He’d applied a fresh bandage before they’d left the hot springs. Once the mud hardened, it stayed on Daring very well, and remained completely intact even now.

“Healing very fast, thanks to you,” Daring said. “I’ll be better in no time, but I’m gonna stay off it until after the trip’s over.”

“Good idea.”

The going was no less difficult than it’d been before the manticore attack, but with Daring working with John instead of jumping down his throat, he felt it was a lot more bearable. When they’d come to a bad patch of brambles, Daring suggested they go around.

“You know…” John said, “I think we need to brute force this one down.”

“You’re kidding, right?”

“No.” John pointed to their surroundings. Far to their left, there was a winding river. It was wide, and when they stopped to listen, they could hear its near-torrential rapids. The dense trees made it impossible to say how long it’d be before they could find a suitable place to ford it.

On the other side, the land dipped sharply and looked a lot worse than what lay ahead. “Hm, I guess you’re right,” Daring admitted. “This does look like the best way… even if it’ll probably take longer.”

It took them several hours, but they managed to break through, largely because of Daring. As they continued their journey deeper into the Everfree, John noticed they’d often give each other sidelong looks, grinning at one another. But it was more than the passion they’d shared in the caverns. He could feel it between them.

It was respect.

If you told me this how things would turn out, then I’d have called bullshit. He allowed himself a look at her ass—something he’d been doing on the regular ever since there was enough light for it. There was something about the way her hips moved with each step she took, and he frequently caught glimpses of her asshole and pussy every time her tail swished just right.

“Ugh, I kind of wanna just take a break and fuck,” she said hours later, as if reading his thoughts. “You feel me?”

John placed a hand on her right flank and caressed her thigh. “I do now. But I think it should wait until we’re out of this damn forest. I don’t think I’ve got another escape from a bloodthirsty manticore in me, and I don’t think there’ll be another cave conveniently in our escape path.”

Daring laughed. “Point taken.”

It was almost sundown, and they’d stopped three times for breaks. Daring still wore her bandage, even though chunks of it had begun falling off. “Still better than nothing,” she’d said when John had asked her about it. The underbrush grew much thicker, but thank Celestia there weren’t any brambles, and John led the way, using his larger, taller frame to part the greenery.

“Holy fuck!” John said.

“What? What?” Daring rushed to join him.

The growth had suddenly stopped, and they found themselves standing at the edge of a clearing. The last rays of sunlight were visible over the canopy, and in the centre of the clearing was a tree. This would’ve been quite unremarkable, except radiant blue crystals grew within its core, the tree’s wood intertwining with them.

John couldn’t fucking believe it. “It’s… it’s—”

“You two?” came a familiar voice. Violet, followed by Autumn and the third pegasus mare, emerged from the trees on the clearing’s opposite side.

“What are you three doing here?” Daring asked.

Autumn beamed at her. “We were gonna ask you the same thing.”

The four mares embraced while John watched awkwardly, allowing himself an inward smile. Heh… I fucked their boss in the ass. And she loved it.

“Daring—your wing!” Autumn said.

“It’ll be okay, thanks to John.”

The three mares stared at him, gape-mouthed. “John?” Violet said. John could taste the salt in her voice, and oh, how sweet it was.

Daring winked at him. “After we’d escaped the manticore, we found a cave with some mud and moss, and hot—water. Water. Yeah. John put my wing back to its normal position, and the stuff he used kept it there. He did good—better than I could’ve done on my own.”

“How many times have you broken your wing now?” Violet asked.

Daring laughed. “I’ve lost count.”

While they were talking, John began moving toward the crystalline tree. It seemed that Daring’s information was good; the crystals weren’t like anything he’d seen before. He stopped just short of the tree and tepidly extended a hand toward one of the crystals. It was so warm to the touch, he almost pulled his finger back from the sudden shock. It was like gripping a ceramic mug full of pot-fresh coffee. “Whoa.”

“What is it?” Daring rushed over to him, the other mares in tow.

John shook his head. “These crystals are magic, all right. I feel… funny. Wait—!”

Violet extended a forehoof, but didn’t listen to him. She touched the crystal, much too hard, and it snapped like a dehydrated twig. John made a grab for the falling fragment, but he was too slow. It landed on the dirt, shattering into smithereens. “Oops.”

John opened his mouth, but Daring beat him to the punch: “You stupid cunt. This is why we brought him along, remember?” Daring shot him a grin that only he could see.

Ever so gently, John brushed his fingertips against the crystal. Now that he was expecting the heat, he didn’t flinch when he felt it. That sensation from before rushed through him. All the aches and pains he’d accumulated from the journey began to fade the longer his fingers touched the crystal. “The Celestite, it’s a miracle healing crystal! But be careful. I have no idea what its composition is, but it’s very fragile, not like anything I’ve ever seen on Earth.”

Laughter filled the clearing. “We’re gonna be so rich!” Daring said. “But… how do we get it out? It’s in there pretty good.”

“We can’t, not easily,” John said. He’d removed his hand, feeling almost completely refreshed. The places where he’d put his fingers were slightly duller. I guess it holds magic like some kind of electric charge, and there’s only so much of it. “We’d need to spend hours with proper tools to remove the wood. It’ll be easy to break the crystals into chunks, but not without shattering it.”

“So, we need to try to break it into small enough bits for us to carry?” Daring asked. “Fuck, I wish I still had my machete.”

“I’ve got mine,” Autumn said, drawing it and placing it at Daring’s hooves.

Daring nodded to John, who picked it up. “This could take a while. Is it sharp? The finer the edge, the better.”

The mares looked to one another for a moment before Violet reached into her saddlebags and produced a whetstone. After John sharpened the blade, he went about the slow and meticulous task of cutting. First, he crudely sawed through the tree at the stump, having to stop and whet the blade several times, and then he cut through the thicker parts of wood.

He had to stop midway through the process, as it got too dark. They spent the night a lot more pleasantly than they’d done previously. At first, he thought it was just Daring’s orders that kept them from treating him badly, but then he realized they were actually showing him genuine respect. They finally understood that without him, they’d have likely destroyed the crystals completely, and thus, all their profits.

It wasn’t until just past noon the next day that he managed to finish cutting the crystal. The process was more like sawing through it, despite the blade not being serrated. When he’d finished, it was divided into four fairly heavy parts. Fortunately for them, the three mares had managed to save their saddlebags from the camp before running from the manticore.

With their remaining equipment and careful packing, John was able to get the fragments onto their backs and his without breaking them, as long as they didn’t drop them on the way back to Ponyville.

“What about me?” Daring said when she’d realized there were only four parts, and not five—and that John meant to carry the last piece.

“You can’t fuck up your wing any more,” John replied. “Here. Maybe this will help.” He broke off a slender piece of crystal about the size of his index finger and placed it in the bandage as he reapplied it with damp moss from a nearby tree.

“Ooh, that’s hot!” Daring said, but she didn’t flinch.

“I guess this will be the field test, huh?” John said, making sure the bandage was properly applied. This moss wasn’t as good or sturdy as what they’d found in the caverns, but it’d have to do. “Just be careful. I don’t know how well that bandage will hold.”

“Right.” Daring stole a kiss when the others weren’t looking.

John knew the return trip to Ponyville would be long, made even longer because they’d lost almost all of their supplies earlier, and they had to be careful to preserve their prize, but somehow, he knew it wouldn’t be too bad.

“Two rooms?” an earth pony behind a big mahogany desk asked.

They were inside a hotel lobby in Ponyville. John knew he still needed to extract the crystal from the wood, but all of them had agreed that it could wait. First, they needed sleep in a proper bed, as well as a good, hot meal.

“Yes,” Daring said.

John took a seat on one of the sofas in the lobby while Daring worked out the details with the receptionist. He found it weird how that earth pony wore nothing except for a white tuxedo collar and black bowtie. What’s even the point if most of them are just not wearing anything all the time?

He was definitely sore from the return trip, but not nearly as sore thanks to the crystals. Even though he knew it would sap some of the power from them, he and the mares had used them to rejuvenate themselves, making their journey go a lot faster than he’d have expected. The four days it took them to get back to civilization were mercifully uneventful, and even pleasant.

Daring, having finished her business with the stallion, came to get John and the others and led them up a flight of stairs into the hallway. When they’d reached their two rooms, Daring handed Autumn a key.

Autumn opened the door and groaned. “Just one king bed? We have to sleep with him?”

“It’s all they had,” Daring said, “but don’t worry.” She winked at him. “I’m gonna take one for the team tonight. He’ll be in the other room with me.”

The other mares exchanged glances, but seemed happy enough as they filed into the room, still carrying their chunks of crystal. John couldn’t help but laugh when the door closed with a click. “You know, since the rooms are next door, they’re gonna hear us.”

“Who cares?” Daring said. “The job’s done, and that crystal’s not nearly as valuable now as it will be once you’re done with it.”

“Good point.” John followed her into their room. It was identical to the other one, as far as he could tell. A pink comforter covered the king bed that had three large, well-fluffed pillows. After he set the crystal down under the coat rack, he kicked off his shoes. They, like the rest of his clothes, were ruined, but that crystal was likely worth even more than he’d originally guessed, so he couldn’t bring himself to care.

As he was eyeing the bed, Daring turned toward the bathroom. She’d only taken a few steps inside when he knew what she was about to do. “I don’t think we should get the bed dirty, should we?”

The playful tone in her voice said a lot more than she did. John wasted no time tossing his clothes behind him as Daring turned the shower on. He was impressed. It was one of those full showers with a door and a seat. While it didn’t look built for two, he had no trouble slipping in next to her.

For the first time since they’d left the hot springs, John felt clean again. As the water rolled down him, Daring stalked toward him. “Take a seat,” she said, her commanding voice silky over the running water. When John sat, she said, “I owe you. I really do.”

“Don’t mention it.” John couldn’t help but notice her staring hungrily at his cock. Even without her touching it, he could feel himself getting turned on.

“I insist.” Daring extended her wing—the one that’d been broken. The bandage had washed off, and there was no trace of the Celestite. “Good as new. Now let me show you something that us ponies are definitely better at than humans.”

“Your wing’s better? That’s really—” Ooohh… fuuuck…

John let out a gasp. Daring had wrapped her once-shattered wing around his cock and began teasing it with her feathers. It was the oddest, softest thing he’d ever felt. Her grin only widened as he instantly found himself at full-mast. The feathers were gripping him just hard enough to stroke his shaft, but otherwise, it felt like fucking a really expensive down pillow.

Shivers ran through him, creating an odd contrast with the steady stream of water cascading down his body. “Just sit back and enjoy. Everypony—no—everyone loves a good wingjob.”

But he couldn’t just sit there. He leaned forward, grabbing Daring’s neck, and pulled her into a kiss, sighing with pleasure as she kept stroking him with her wing. He ran his fingers through her mane, sliding his tongue around in her mouth. John quickly realized it felt almost as good as her ass as they made out, their first time having a proper kiss since the hot springs.

When they broke their kiss, Daring began to stroke faster. Despite her wing working on him more, it felt no tighter. John knew this sensation shouldn’t be possible, but he wasn’t about to question it as his cock throbbed harder, the pleasure constantly rippling through him. ‘F-fuck, Daring! If we keep doing shit like this, I’m gonna start getting hard-ons every time I’m around hot water.”

Daring laughed and kissed him again, wrapping her forelegs around him, not stopping her wing’s movements in the meantime. John tried to buck his hips into her wing, but with her on top of him, he could only manage little jerks. His cock was painfully hard to the point where it ached. It was like the wing going up and down its length was somehow just teasing him and getting him off at the same time.

He moaned and leaned into their kiss. It just felt so good. He wanted so badly to make it last, but he just couldn’t—no matter how good it felt. It was too much. John’s eyes shot open as semen exploded from the tip of his cock all over Daring’s wing. He could feel her smile while they kissed as his cock jerked and spasmed, firing a few more shots all over her feathers.

Daring slowly withdrew, licking her lips. “I guess you enjoyed it?”

John nodded mutely.

“Heh, this is the second time you’ve fucked my wing,” Daring said. She turned from the water and began to lick the cum that hung between her feathers in sticky strands. “Let’s keep it like this from now on. Hey—this tastes pretty sweet.”

John could only sit there with his chest heaving. His mouth hung open as he watched her essentially preen his jizz from her wings. He never thought he’d see that, or how hot he’d find it. By the time she finished, John could stand again, still feeling euphoric from being stroked off like that. After they washed each other, they stepped out of the shower and towelled off.

“Looks like someone’s not done yet,” Daring said as she threw her used towel at John. It landed on his cock and hung there. “How about we take care of that? That bed looks like it could do with some breaking in.”

John discarded the towel and followed her into the bedroom, noticing how her tail’s immodest position exposed her ass and pussy for him to see. “Daring, you just make me feel so good—I can’t get enough.”

When they were on the bed, Daring tackled him onto his back, pinning him with surprising strength. She straddled him. “We may have found the Celestite, but even though it’ll pay out our weight in bits, I think I know what the real treasure from that expedition was.”

“So do I.”

“You,” they both said.

Daring leaned into John, kissing him fiercely, and he could feel her tight asshole kiss the tip of his cock. Slowly, she took him in, moaning into his mouth as he penetrated her. John slid his hands up and down her smooth, curvy body, drinking in its supple feel. Despite having just shot cum all over her wing, he still felt just as hard as before they’d started.

And then Daring began to ride him. Her toned ass slapped into his thighs as she bounced up and down on his cock. John intertwined his legs with hers and bucked his hips in time with her bounces. Her forehooves felt him up and down as she rode him, the bed creaking with their movements.

This really is worth more than however much that crystal’s gonna pay out, John thought blissfully as fiery hot pleasure spread down his cock, through his crotch, and all over his body. Daring’s moans grew louder and more frequent. She began shivering and shuddering in his grasp. She pulled back her head and huskily said, “Mnnf, I’m gonna cum!”

Daring’s tongue lolled out of her mouth, and John could feel a familiar tightening around his cock. The sudden shock of it surged through him. All of his muscles clenched, his body desperately trying to find a way to cope with the sheer ecstasy. He brought both hands back and spanked her hard.

She howled with pleasure as her pussy juices splashed against his crotch and lower belly. Her wings flared, and she wildly bucked up and down on his lap. John leaned into her, kissing her neck and thrusting hard into her super-tight asshole. He gripped her so hard, he could feel the tension in his fingers.

But he didn’t care. It felt so fucking good, the pleasure almost overwhelmed him. Every time he thought he’d taken as much as he could handle, Daring felt better and better wrapped tightly around him. He couldn’t tell if she’d stopped orgasming, because she wordlessly rode him harder than ever, and she was no less tight than before, but she’d stopped trembling. Instead, she groaned and grunted.

Sweat plastered John’s body. At this rate, he’d need another shower. He looked up into her eyes. Maybe it was how big, bright, and expressive they were, but he’d never been looked at by a human woman the way Daring was looking at him now—and he’d been with a few in his university days.

“C-cmon, big boy,” Daring said. Her voice dripped with lust. “I know you’ve got another hot, creamy load inside you. Fill me with it. Plaster your love all over my insides!”

With one hand on her back and the other on the back of her head, he pulled her into a deep kiss and lived the dream he never knew he had: cumming inside Daring Do. Again. Until now, he’d always thought the term “mind-shattering orgasm” was hyperbole, but what he was going through right now made him realize that was bullshit.

He came so hard, his vision blurred for a second as the pleasure rocked him with no signs of slowing down. Even though he’d cum on Daring’s wing not long ago, he could tell the load he was firing deep inside her was massive. His cock pumped and pulsed, discharging rivulets of seed in Daring and breakers of ecstasy in his brain.

Finally completely spent, he slumped backwards and stared at Daring dopily. A strand of drool ran down his cheek. He felt too weak to move or do anything. With dick at last softening, he saw Daring allow herself to topple from her perch on top of him and lay beside him. Somehow, John managed, “Do… you think the others heard us?”

“Dear Celestia, I hope so,” Daring said. “Serves them right for treating you like shit. Now they’ll know what they’re missing out on.”

“So,” John said, “got another job for me? Maybe one where it’s just the two of us working together?”

“Yeah, I do.” With a wink, Daring kissed him on the cheek. “How does a wingjob tomorrow morning sound?”

Author's Note

Hey! You made it.

This was an... interesting story to write. The request was rather specific, and took me outside of what I'd usually produce in regards to fiction. There are some differences in the narrative to what you might see in most of my stories, and I think that explains why. That's the main reason I haven't been replying to criticisms in the comments, as near every answer would be the same: it's what was requested!

And I think I did a good job of fulfilling my commissioner's desire here! If you agree with me, and enjoyed the story, feel free to hit the like button, helps me a lot! Also, follow my account if you'd like to see when future work drops!

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Hope you had fun. Much love!