Where the Surf and Sky Collide

by Some Leech

Rating: mature
Tags: Profanity, Slice of Life, Human, Anon, Porn, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Queen Novo, Fetish, Comedy, Sex
Length: 5210

Having narrowly avoided yet another encounter with the Princesses, Anon finds himself drifting towards the briny depths...

Anon hadn't expected to encounter, let alone be saved by Queen Chrysalis, yet her rescue left him with a new, wholly unforeseen problem - drowning. Slipping into the briny depths, cursing his penchant for pastel pony posteriors, he's spared from a waterlogged fate, but there's a price to be paid...

Kinks Include: Male on Female, Oral, Vaginal, Interspecies, Size Difference, Transformations, a New Meaning to Surf and Turf, Squirting, a Creampie, and Hints of a Conspiracy Most Fowl...

Artwork by PussPuss

If you want to help support me, I have a Tip-Jar/Patreon HERE

Published 2021-10-27 20:10:05 UTC
Last updated 2021-10-27 20:10:05 UTC

Chicken or Fish?

“So you want me to believe that some random unicorn just happened to teleport you several miles off the coast, without any fair warning, and expected you to swim to land?” Queen Novo inquired, incredulously lifting a brow.

“For the fifth time, yes,” Anon groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I don’t know who they were, and I really don’t know why they sent me here, but that’s what happened - anyways, that’s not important. What is important is that you were kind enough to take me in - after one of your subjects saved me from drowning, of course.”

Crossing the chamber and seating himself on the Queen’s bed, he buried his face in his hands. He needed time to think, to buy time to figure out a believable, bullshit story that he could sell to the hippogriff’s ruler, but he’d been put on the back-foot in the worst possible way. After he’d awoken from his near-death experience, having been saved by a random seapony, he’d been hauled to the monarch’s palace on Mount Aris.

The entire night had been a blur, from his watery rescue to being carried to the castle, and the last thing he’d remembered was passing out on a rather lavish bed in one of the keep’s guest quarters. While he was immeasurably thankful that he hadn’t met his untimely demise in Davy Jones’ locker, that didn’t help him with concocting a reasonable explanation regarding his appearance. Unfortunately for him, after sleeping like a waterlogged brick, he’d been awoken and briskly escorted to the Queen’s chamber for questioning.

“Hmmmm -” Novo hummed, drawing his attention, “are you sure you’re alright?”

“I mean, for someone who nearly died, I think I’m doing pretty well,” he weakly laughed.

Though he hadn’t ever met the regal hippogriff before, or any hippogriff for that matter, he’d heard tales of the illustrious Queen from Twilight. Like the rest of her kind, she was able to seamlessly metamorphose between an aquatic, fish-like form to a bird-pony state, yet he’d only seen her in the former. Since he’d entered her spacious, rather lavish room, she’d spent the entirety of their conversation casually lounging in a large pool which occupied nearly half of the boudoir.

Smoothly lifting herself out of the water and onto the polished floor, she propped herself onto her elbows and examined him - much the same way as he’d been subtly studying her. Though he was reluctant to admit it, there was something sensually captivating about her - well, as captivating as a weird mer-horse could be. Her size and elegance, from what little he’d seen of it, were comparable to Princess Celestia, yet that was far from her most striking feature.

He’d seen ponies sporting all sorts of widely clashing, rather unusual color palettes, although not a single one could hold a candle to the Queen. Her piercing, magenta eyes, violet fins, and a mane that faded from a fuschia to a brilliant mulberry were striking in and of themselves, but the tips of her flippers were a vivid turquoise - a fact that made him wonder if they were somehow painted. Only just catching himself, as his eyes began to wander down her body, he shook his head.

“Could we maybe pick this up later? If it’s alright with you, I may need a bit more time to recover,” he muttered.

“You know what, that’s fine. After the ordeal you’ve been through, I’m not sure what I was thinking,” she exasperatedly remarked, closing her eyes and rubbing one temple. “Go and get your rest, I’ll just contact Twilight and ask her -”

“Don’t!” he blurted, thrusting a hand in her direction.

Rearing back slightly, doubtlessly taken aback by his sudden outburst, her shock almost immediately gave way to suspicion. Fidgeting under her gaze, having effectively jumped out of the frying pan and into the fire, his thoughts raced. The last thing he needed her to do was contact the Princess, any of the Princesses, although in his haste to stop her he’d immediately made the situation worse.

“You don’t want your friend to know you’re alright?” she asked, looking him dead in the eye. “Or is there something you’re not telling me…?”

Twisting under her scrutinizing gaze, Anon pulled at his collar. “M...maybe?”

“Alright,” she cooed, her eyes never wavering from his own, “then I’m sure she and Celestia would be happy to clear this up for me - that is, unless you’re willing to clear this up for me.”

The statement sent a cold chill up his spine, as she practically nailed him to the wall on the subject. If he lied or attempted to mislead her, there was a very good chance she’d call him out on it or, worse yet, make good on her promise to contact one of the quartet of alicorns he’d been doing his damnedest to avoid. Pressed into a corner, feeling his shoulders wilt, he weakly smiled.

“Just promise me you won’t laugh…” he murmured.

“I only laugh if something’s funny, and I don’t consider this a joking matter,” she flatly countered, her tail annoyedly flipping at the water’s edge.

And so, with great reluctance and a heaping-helping of embarrassment, Anon recounted his exploits of the past two weeks. From being coerced by the Princess of Love to the very forceful advances of Queen Chrysalis, resulting in his unplanned and nearly fatal dunk in the sea, there wasn’t a single detail he omitted - that being said, he did gloss over some of the particulars of his debaucherous hijinks with the four females he’d bedded.

“Now do you see why I don’t want you to talk to Twilight?” he resignedly concluded.

“I do,” she began, having kept silent throughout his recount, “but that doesn’t mean I believe you.”

The Queen’s skepticism, in spite of him having just spilled the scandalous beans, caused him to facepalm. “Lemme guess, you want me to prove I’m not pulling your leg - er - fin.”

“I mean, if you’re offering,” she blithely tittered.

His head shot up, his eyes widened, and his heart skipped a beat, as he blinked in disbelief. “Seriously? You seriously want me to do that with you right here and now?”

“What, are you afraid to do it with me?” she jested, drawing one flipper down her chest and towards her abdomen.

Following her limb, seeing her roll to the side, he got his first look at her loins - well, whatever the seapony equivalent of what loins were. Situated above the base of her tail and beneath her stomach, roughly where someone’s hips would be, was what he could only describe as an unobtrusive yet unmistakable slit. A pair of taut-looking, pearly, inconspicuous lips concealed her interior, but it didn’t stay that way for long.

“If your story is true, having supposedly pleased a Princess and a changeling Queen,” she purred, lightly pulling at her nethers to give him a fleeting glimpse of her succulent, vividly pink depths, “I’m surprised you wouldn’t leap at the chance to prove yourself to me.”

Though she wasn’t nearly as assertive as Cadance or Chrysalis, both of whom had effectively thrust themselves upon him, the Queen’s brazen and shameless display left him with a choice. He could either gave Novo a demonstration of the sexual arts, potentially corrupting her with a libidinous thirst as he had with his previous partners, or he could turn her down and risk his whereabouts being reported. Seeing no other option, yet uncertain of where things would go from there, he was stricken with an idea.

“On one condition,” he sternly stated, doing his best to sound resolute, “after we’re finished, so long as you’re satisfied, you give me sanctuary.”

Narrowing her eyes, she thoughtfully rubbed her chin. "I can’t say I’ll be able to do that, but I have a counter offer. If you’re not making all this up, I’ll arrange for an associate of mine to take you in - at least temporarily. There’s no guarantee that you’ll find permanent refuge, but it would buy you a few weeks to come up with some sort of plan.”

Giving a defeated shrug, he unseated himself and started crossing the chamber towards his host. “Let me guess, it’s a political thing?”

“Something like that, but we can discuss it later,” she giggled, glancing at his crotch.

Over the span of less than a month, he’d laid four distinctly different species, with each holding a unique charm, and he was about to add a fifth to the list. As much as he would like to say he was surprised by Novo’s blackmail, after everything he’d been through, he was less than shocked - still, that didn’t mean some part of him wasn’t excited at the prospect of getting down and dirty with the exotic beauty before him. As he neared the pool, pulling off his shirt, he slowed.

Doing the deed with an aquatic creature would definitely be a first for him, but that hadn’t stopped him in the past and it wasn’t going to stop him now. Unbuttoning his pants and letting them fall to the floor, he wriggled out of his underwear and sank to one knee. There’d been a time when his modesty would have given him a moment for pause, making him hesitant to bear himself to someone he’d just met, yet that time had passed; after having shown himself off to his previous partners, he’d grown less and less reserved about being seen in the buff.

As he knelt down beside her, steadily extending an open hand to her side, he pursed his lips in consternation. Seeing as how he wasn’t sure of the best way to proceed, uncertain of just how different seapony anatomy was to a typical equine’s, he figured the best course of action would be to start with some foreplay and go from there - that was if the Queen was up for it. As he lightly stroked her soft, warm hide, he smiled over at her.

“You want to warm each other up first?” he inquired, prompting her to nod. “Alright, just follow my lead.”

Laying beside her, with his head pointed towards her tail, he cautiously squirmed up to his impending mate. As his face inched nearer to her nethers, detecting a subtle scent of the sea, he fought back a grin and licked his lips - not just because he was about to bed another royal, but because the notion of regal sushi didn’t escape him. Just as he started to lean in, steadily extending his tongue, something flicked his semi-rigid cock and broke his attention.

Inquisitively prodding his tool, Novo glanced down her chest at him. “And I’m supposed to put this in my mouth?”

“You can, but you don’t have to,” he explained. “I wasn’t sure if - Mmmmm!”

Without the slightest bit of warning, the Queen smoothly slipped his manhood into her muzzle. Like some enthusiastic and randy youth, she took him completely off guard. Pleasantly surprised by just how eager she was, he gathered himself and pressed his face to her sex. As his tongue glided over her entrance, while she experimentally nursed on his length, they set upon one another.

Though he’d gotten a mental chuckle about the notion of seafood, he hadn’t been that far off. Salty and fresh, with just the slightest note of sweetness, the unusual flavor of her juices washed over his palate. Draping one arm over the base of her tail, affectionately stroking her, he sank his tongue into her snug depths.

To Novo’s credit, even though she was inexperienced, she passionately gave as good as she got. As her full, pouting lips mopped his shaft, sending sparks of bliss through him, she endearingly hummed and breathed upon his groin. The blowjob was almost staggeringly skillful, even if the sensation of her flipper against his thigh was a bit odd, which left him with a question - how in the world did she know what she was doing? Momentarily pulling away, watching her bob and torque her head, he made a mental note to ask her later.

Laying atop the slick marble floor, with the hushed sounds of stifled moans filling the air, their leisurely pace steadily increased. Anon couldn’t speak for her, but he hoped she was enjoying herself as much as he was. Mere minutes ago, when she’d propositioned him, he’d been genuinely uncertain of how pleasant the experience would be for either of them, but his concern gradually disappeared. While her snatch wasn’t quite the same as anything he’d encountered before, she seemed to like his ministrations all the same.

On and on he went, flipping between lapping at her to outright tongue-fucking her, until a startling realization dawned on him - she may just outlast him at the rate they were going. Though there wasn’t anything inherently wrong with cumming before her, his pride and past exploits practically demanded he best her, especially since it was her first time. Tightening his grip around her tail, and slipping his free arm around her lower back, he pulled her in and ramped up the intensity.

The fury of his oral caught her unawares, causing her motions to falter, but that didn’t stop him - if anything, it spurred him on. As far as he was concerned, she already had a handicap in her favor. Without bosoms to play with, or any discernible clit, his options for getting her off were fairly limited - not to mention he had no idea if or where her erogenous zones were! Left to rely on his instincts alone, taking note of any subtle shivers or changes in her tone, he redoubled his efforts.

Going at her like a ravenous animal, leaning more heavily on raw vehemence than skill alone, his tactic began to pay off - well, he felt pretty sure that it was starting to pay off. Though it was slight, almost imperceptible, he noticed the periodic tremble course through her when his tongue wandered towards the bottom of her sex. Aside from the tactile cues of rapture, as well as her blowjob losing a fair bit of steam, her muted groans became more frequent.

Sensing her resolve beginning to wane, emboldened by taking the upper hand, he fixated on her apparent weak spot. Little by little, lick by lick, his theory was proven true. She all but stopped sucking his dick, opting instead to press her cheek to his thigh while he ate her out. With the tables turned, having her on the ropes, he pressed the amorous assault.

He couldn’t deny that he’d begun taking great pride in his unrivaled carnal prowess, despite the fact that it had resulted in him being a wanted man. There was something intoxicating about introducing eroticism to creatures and delivering them rapture on a level they’d never experienced before. As her shaking grew worse and worse, hearing the breath hitch in her throat, he was ultimately rewarded with a piercing, climactic wail and a facefull of rich, thick nectar.

Ordinarily speaking, having brought someone to finish, he would have given his partner a bit of reprieve, but not this time. Since the illustrious Queen had deemed fit to compel him, he thought it only fair to really hammer the point home. She’d asked him to prove himself, which he had done with resounding success, yet she had failed to mention anything about if or when he should stop.

Fiercely focusing on the sensitive area of her cunt, fighting through the waves of her syrupy juices, he reaped his unseamly vengeance upon her. The octave of her ecstatic cry elevated, her shuddering transitioned into jerky, spasming movements, and she nearly flopped back into the pool - nearly. Securing his grasp on her, feeling as though he was wrestling with a convulsing, violently orgasming porpoise, his joy came to an end when a furious pounding at the door wrenched shattered his vindictive glee.

“Queen Novo?” a voice called, followed by yet more beating on the door. “My Queen, are you alright?”

“I...It’s - Cough - fine,” Novo bleated, somehow composing herself just enough to avert a catastrophe. “I...I was just showing off my singing voice.”

Anon glanced from the exit to a nearby window, briefly pondering if he would be forced to defenestrate himself for a second time in his life. Though he took some solace from knowing that the Queen wasn’t married or in a relationship that he knew of, the last thing he needed was to be confronted by a group of concerned, confused, and likely armed guards demanding to know what he’d done to their disheveled, still-quivering ruler.

A long pregnant pause awaited the pair, as they both peered at the doorway, before they finally got a reply. “Are you sure you don’t need assistance?”

“Did I stutter?” she shouted, making the man flinch. “I said I’m showing off my singing voice. Now unless you need me for something, I’d appreciate some privacy for the rest of the evening!”

“Y...yes, Ma’am, o...of course!” the nameless sentry shakily responded.

Hearing several sets of claws retreating down the hallway outside, Anon slowly exhaled his held breath. Not only had the Queen made a miraculous recovery, but she’d spared him from a very awkward situation. Feeling her shift, only then relaxing his grip on her, he watched her spin around and crawl up his body.

“That was even better than what C -” she caught herself, clamping her lips shut. “Maybe we can move to the next part now,” she deflectively continued, touching a shell brooch which hung from her neck.

The brilliant flash of light that followed was blinding, temporarily robbing Anon of his vision, but he knew what he’d heard. She’d been about to say something, barely stopping herself from letting something slip, and he had a sinking feeling about it. Rubbing his eyes, praying that the knot forming in his stomach was for nothing, he rolled to his stomach and tried to push himself up - tried in that a set of taloned digits scooped him up and plucked him from the floor.

Being unceremoniously deposited onto what had to be the bed with a resounding Pomf, he blinked away his blindness and gazed in awe at the majestic creature looming over him. Bearing the same coloration as before, yet in a strikingly different, quadrupedal state, Novo was just as, if not more resplendent than ever. Tall, svelte, and with her wings extended to either side of herself, she could have been mistaken for an angel. As she leaned in towards him, bringing her beak mere inches from his face, she coyly grinned.

“Have any particular suggestions for how we should proceed?” she whispered.

Her sultry expression, alluring features, and just how direct she was left Anon at a loss for words. After the sixty-nine, the terrifying excitement of nearly being walked in on, and finding himself suddenly face to face with his gorgeous host, he was more than happy to pick up where they’d left off. Twisting his head and surveying the mattress, he slid towards one side of the bed.

“Lay down here,” he instructed, rolling to the side and patting the sheets before himself, “and face away from me.”

“Don’t want me to look at that flat mug of yours, huh?” she snickered, easing herself down. Looking back, seeing a wounded look on his face, she reached back and endearingly patted his hip. “I’m joking! I’d like to think you humans have a sense of humor!”

“Heh - Sorry, I’m still kind of on edge about those guards,” he grumbled, casting a glance at the doorway. “You don’t think they’ll barge in on us, do you?”

“Trust me, if they did, they’d have more to worry about than getting an eyeful - besides, they know better than to disobey their Queen,” she chuckled, adjusting herself and pressing her back to his chest. “And for the record,” she continued, peering over her shoulder at him, “I don’t think you look half bad.”

The flattery, though tame compared to what they’d just done by the pool, caused his cheeks to darken. Out of all his previous partners, she was the first to compliment his looks, warming his heart and rekindling his passion. Smiling to himself, sliding towards the foot of the bed, he positioned his crotch at her backside.

“Bend your legs a little,” he prompted, caressing her hip.

Doing as asked, straightening her hind legs, she angled her head and peeked down at her rump. “Like this?”

As his manhood nudged her hot, moist marehood, feeling her wink, he nodded. “Yeah, that’ll work perfectly.”

One of the things he’d discovered on his wayward adventure was that there were only so many positions a man could comfortably make love to a quadruped, but there was one he had yet to try. Spooning with a Novo, while taking them from behind, would more than likely be pleasant for both of them; all he had to do was put his little theory to the test. Guiding himself to her entrance, he looked into her eyes.

“Go on,” she playfully goaded, wiggling her ass against him, “don’t leave a mare waiting.”

Resting one hip on her slender waist, he slowly drove his hips forward and slid into her awaiting depths. After the foreplay, having his endurance tested, he was just enthusiastic as Novo was - still, he wasn’t about to rush things. Given that she’d assured their privacy, they should both be able to enjoy themselves. Seconds dragged on, listening to her quavering breaths, before he finally bottomed out within her.

“Feel alright?” he asked, flexing his cock while rubbing her belly.

Clamping herself around the base of his length, she nodded. “Better than alright, it feels amazing. You’re just so big,” she reverently noted.

Grinning all the wider, emboldened by her praise, he started to move. Languidly withdrawing, while she clenched and fought his retreat, he freed nearly half of his shaft and stopped. It took everything he had not to give in to his urges, to start plowing her, but he had something special up his sleeve. Remaining motionless, waiting until she looked back expectantly, he gave her her first real thrust.

Her reaction was nothing short of priceless. Her eyelids fluttered, a whorish, wholly unbecoming whimper escaped her, and he felt her marehood angrily wink, as he prodded her womb, but he wasn’t finished with her yet - not by a long shot. With one hand on her abdomen, worming his free arm under her, he held her close and began the main event.

“Mmmph Mmmph Mmmph,” she softly grunted with every impact of their bodies. “This is incredible.”

“Yeah?” he huffed, his fingers dancing over her torso. “What’s so incredible about it?”

He wasn’t normally one to ask for feedback, but not one of his past mates had given him any insightful input on the matter, save for the periodic cries of ‘Harder’ or ‘Don’t stop’. Novo likely wouldn’t be the last Equestrian native he’d end up getting intimate with, if his recent exploits had been any indication of the future, so honing his technique would be prudent. Continuing at a leisurely pace, genuinely curious to hear what she had to say, he gently screwed and awaited her reply.

“I...it’s - Aaahn - it’s not like anything I’ve ever felt b...before,” she stammered, bucking back to meet him. “Every time you drive your thing into me, it’s like - Mnnn - it’s like lightning bolts surge through me!”

Twisting her upper half, showing a surprising amount of flexibility, she reached back, slipped a foreclaw behind his head, and pulled him into a kiss. The pinpricks of her talons against his skin, and the sensation of her keratinous beak against his lips may have been disconcerting, had he not been stricken by the raw passion of it all. Closing his eyes, returning every bit of her affection, he pressed his tongue into her mouth.

A part of him realized that things were less than ideal. The kiss was a bit awkward, he wasn’t screwing her as deeply as possible, and he felt certain that he could better stimulate her g-spot if they changed positions, yet those were petty grievances. There were moments when primal desires took precedence, and this was one such moment for them both.

Though he’d known her for less than a day, Anon could see himself growing fond of the hippogriff ruler. She was sassy, spry, and not afraid to say what she wanted, if his assessment of her was correct. Her charming personality, regal status, and gorgeous looks would have been enough to catch his interest in and of themselves, yet there was another element at play, an element she’d given him his first taste of - a hint of romance.

It wasn’t like he hadn’t kissed others before, be it in the heat of the moment or not, but there was something different with the Queen - something that caused his blood to run hot. Maybe he was delusionally smitten because one of her people had saved his life, or perhaps something about her personality resonated with him - in either case, he wanted nothing more than to please her. As he made out with her, his right hand crept to her groin.

His assumption about her decidedly more mammalian form was cemented, when his digit grazed her bulbous clit. If there was one thing he’d learned about females, regardless of their species, it was that the illusive love-button was the key to pleasuring them. Gently stroking the sensitive little nub, eliciting a light gasp from her, he was going to make good and damn to give her a night she wouldn’t soon forget.

As he tenderly plowed her, periodically altering the angle of his thrusts or throwing in the occasional gyration of his hips, he contentedly hummed into her mouth. Virtually every other debaucherous encounter he’d had of late had been inordinately intense, with his partner or himself flying into a lustful frenzy, so the compassionate change of pace was remarkably refreshing. With her tongue entwined with his, she rocked back to meet his plunges.

As if her enchanting appearance and character weren’t compelling enough, the affectionate way she moved with him fanned the flames of his passion into a roaring inferno. Reluctantly breaking their kiss, burying his face in the side of her neck, he willed himself to concentrate - not because he wasn’t enjoying the beaked french kiss, but because if he lost himself his performance would suffer. Though he knew there was a slim chance he’d outlast her, he couldn’t bring himself to give her anything but his best.

Sadly, his attempt to focus was nearly insurmountable. Her delicate, somewhat floral scent filled his sinuses, her velvety interior embraced his pistoning length, and the hushed, blissful noises she made hit every lewd button he had, testing his resolve. It was only when she softly grasped his wrist, lifting his hand to suckle on his fingers, did he ultimately comprehend he’d met his lecherous match.

Try as he might, struggling against the overwhelming bliss she afforded, his stamina was tested and found lacking. His hips became a blur, his heart pounded like mad, and every muscle about his frame tensed, as he bit her shoulder and came. The spontaneous love-nibble, though impulsive, worked much better than he could have thought. Crying to the heavens, with her stuffed marehood gushing over his lap and upper thighs, she joined him through the gates of nirvana.

Ropes of spunk surged through his madly throbbing shaft, flooding into his lover and despoiling her depths with his otherworldly essence. Her vice-like canal quaked and pulsed, coaxing the virile seed from churning balls, as she shook against him. Filled with relief and gratification, he kissed his way up her neck and held her.

Having a climax, in and of itself, was an amazing experience, but there was something unfathomably magical about sharing an orgasm with one’s lover. With their bodies entwined, riding out their ecstasy, they eventually grew still and hauled air into their chests. Though Anon hadn’t expected things to end on such a wonderful high-note, their finale left him grinning like an idiot.

“Was that as good for you as it was for - Hmmf?” his pillow talk was cut short, as she unsheathed herself from his twitching length, flipped around to face him, and jammed her tongue past his lips.

Though a bit unexpected, he repaid the passionate gesture by grasping her toned backside and pulling her to himself. A bit of post-coitus cuddling was the perfect finishing compliment to their hedonistic affair, even if the afternoon was still relatively young. Sharing their breath with one another, only reluctantly rearing back, they gazed into one another’s eyes.

“She was not joking about you,” Novo hummed, walking her talons up his chest.

“Who wasn’t?” he countered, instantaneously reminded that something was amiss.

Truth be told, after such a fantastic lay, he would have more than likely forgotten about her earlier slip-up, but that wasn’t the case. Going against his yearning to embrace her, he shuffled back and grimaced. She was definitely hiding something, though exactly what it was had yet to be seen.

Her expression softened, shifting from contented and cheerful to somewhat somber, seeing his stern look. “Cadance,” she hesitantly admitted, averting her gaze. “She told me that you’d gone missing, and to keep an eye out for you, but she didn’t give me any details at first.”

“So you sold me out?” he croaked, feeling his blood run cold.

“I didn’t tell anypony that you’re here, but there’s a good chance one of my citizens did. Frankly, I’m surprised you didn’t see any of the wanted posters in town - then again, you were a bit waterlogged,” she clarified, inching closer to him.

Scrambling to get off the bed, just as the Queen wrapped her forelegs around him, his fight or flight response kicked into full gear. “I...I’ve got to get out of here.”

“Way ahead of you, Sweetness, I’ve got a friend coming to pick you up,” she smugly hummed, stroking her cheek on his collar. “She should be here by nightfall, so you don’t have too much to worry about.”

“Who’ll be here? Why are you helping me?” he implored, only feeling slightly less anxious than he had seconds ago.

“A friend of mine,” she began, smirking up at him. “And because, since you’re just as amazing as the Princess of Love said, the last thing I’m gonna do is let you get hauled off and thrown into a dungeon somewhere. Now hush and give Mama some sugar.”

The tumultuous cocktail of hormones, fear, and exhilaration weren’t exactly what he’d describe as pleasant, and he still didn’t exactly understand the bizarre circumstances, but he took comfort that he’d avoid apprehension - for the time being, at least. Resting one arm on her back, anxiously stroking her fur, he found himself dwelling on one key question. Whom had the Queen summoned to give him a lift?