Luck On the Rebound
Looking For Luck In All The Wrong Places
Load Full Story"I sense a disturbance in the Party."
Silver Spoon (Tea Party Expert) sighed. "Pinkie, please. You can't call an emergency Party Pony meeting and then be cryptic. All of us have very busy schedules, and I know that includes you."
To her left, Cheese Sandwich (Desperado of Delight) shrugged with a grin. "Hey, nothing wrong with a little showmareship!"
This did not placate the youngest member of the Party Council. "And this is why we need a fifth member, because the two of you dating means you're canoodling and colluding!"
On her right, Party Favor (Master of Balloons) slid his complementary candy bowl over to Silver. "Everypony calm down. Pinkie, could you please be a little more clear?"
Pinkie Pie (Laughter Incarnate) took off her burlap robe and tossed it over to the side of the party cave. "Okay!" She paused, perched on the edge of her chair. "But what I said is kinda the point. What else is there to say?"
"What the disturbance is?" Silver Spoon tried not to yell in frustration.
"Oh!" Pinkie reached just off screen and pulled down a map of Equestria. "I'm pretty sure it's the emergence of a new party pony." She circled the general region of Appleoosa with her hoof. "Around here-ish, I think." She paused, visibly thinking. Her left ear twitched twice, three hairs of her coat stood on end, and there was a cramp in her back-right leg. "Yeah, either there or the opposite side of the world. But that's underwater and I don't know if the Party extends to seaponies."
"So one of us needs to go to Appleoosa and help the new party pony understand to who they are." Party Favor immediately looked to the most logical candidate: Cheese Sandwich.
But Cheese shook his head. "Nope, sorry! My Cheesie Sense says I gotta go to Rainbow Falls!"
There was a moment of silence, mostly as Silver Spoon glared at him.
And then Pinkie sheepishly admitted, "We've got a date."
"And you're prioritizing your love life over party pony business." Silver Spoon snorted with the derision only a filly who thought boys were icky could have.
Fortunately, Party Favor stepped in. "It's fine. I can go. Everypony back at Our Town already isn't expecting me for a few days. I'll find this new party pony while you two have your date."
"It's more than a date!" Pinkie excitedly leapt into TMI territory. "We're going to the Rainbow Falls Traders Exchange! We're going to bring one hundred paperclips and see if we can engage in a convoluted sequence of trades that will slowly increase in value, eventually netting us something crazy like a house or a lifetime supply of kumquats!"
Cheese Sandwich nodded sagely. "Yes. We have to go to Rainbow Falls and Party Favor has to go to Appleoosa."
There was something ominous about how he said it. But Party Favor tried not to read too much into it - even party ponies knew that it was dangerous to try and understand the thought process of a party pony.
Appleoosa was too hot. It wasn't the first time Party Favor had been to the area - Starlight had led a group of them on a recruiting mission that had passed through the region years before. Double Diamond had suffered far worse in the heat, but that didn't mean Party Favor enjoyed it. But it was tolerable today. Last time had been in summer rather than the current autumn that left the dry air just cool enough when a breeze came along.
It was also interesting to see how Appleoosa had grown over the years. When Party Favor had been here last, it had been a scraggly watering hole with little more than a trading post and a train station. Now it was a full-fledged town, packed with ponies and more. (The sight of a young buffalo chatting with a pony made Party briefly curious if the new party pony wasn't a pony at all - that would certainly spice up the meetings.)
As the train he'd gotten off of whistled to signal its departure, Party Favor considered his options. The Pinkie Sense and Cheesie Sense were singular (duoingular?) abilities that he lacked, so instinctively knowing where to find this new party pony was out of the question. But if you were a pony with a talent for parties, some places were more likely than others. The local salt lick was a good one: those usually had a musical act and attracted ponies in search of a good time. He could go trawling for birthday parties or anniversaries, but those were usually private affairs he wouldn't be welcome at. Funeral parlors were a distant possibility - a party pony would be naturally attracted to places that needed cheering.
That was all secondary, though, because one candidate stood out far beyond the rest: rodeos. Even back when Appleoosa was barely just beginning, there were rodeos. Now that it stood as the region's center, they were nearly constant. It was rare there wasn't a week without at least one happening. It pulled in not just the locals but everypony within galloping distance (and then some) for the celebration. It was the obvious first place to start.
It also meant finding one was easy: follow the noise. The cheers, the thunder of hooves, and most encouragingly the laughter. There was a distinct aura of joy that was impossible for a party pony to miss.
The plan, as far as Party Favor was concerned, was simple. Go watch the rodeo. See if any ponies made themselves obvious with their connection to the Party. (He still wasn't fond of that term, but one thing Silver Spoon was correct about was that you couldn't really oppose a Pinkie Pie/Cheese Sandwich tag team.) From there, introduce himself and try to explain what was going on.
There was only one problem: Party Favor didn't like rodeos. He could get behind a good celebration, but rodeos fell into the same category as other sports. His eyes glazed over every time Night Glider talked about racing or Double Diamond about skiing - and anypony who had tried to tell him how great a rodeo could be ended up with that same blank expression in response to their passion. It could have been worse as everypony around him was enjoying themselves - but Party Favor? He was bored.
Down in the arena, ponies were running around doing… stuff. He couldn't follow the specifics. There was rope involved for some parts, the occasional cow or sheep, and at one point there were dogs. (The dogs were neat.) One of the breaks between events is what finally got Party Favor's attention: the clowns emerged.
Party Favor liked clowns. They might not have been his thing, but he understood them in a way he couldn't understand sports. Clowns made sense. He knew at heart how clowns worked and could recognize what it took to be a good one.
And that one was near perfect.
The gentle giant was an amazing physical specimen: obviously brimming with strength and endurance, but he also had surprising dexterity for his size. And he had experience, too - Party could tell with how practiced and professional his motions were. Every pratfall was executed with skill: he managed each slip and trip expertly, seeming as if they were genuine but catching himself in a way that made it obvious he'd been expecting each one. He rolled, jumped, slipped - each motion both braced for and completely unexpected. He was a master and Party Favor was sure this was the pony he was here for.
He made his move once the performance ended amidst the stomping of hooves. Slipping out of the stands, Party circled around the outside of the arena to the dressing rooms. No security - they were probably still keeping an eye on the show itself rather than guarding a bunch of tired clowns. He knocked and a lanky stallion whose face was still covered in white greasepaint answered. "Hi," Party Favor started. "I was wondering if I could talk with the really large clown? I'm a fan." Which was true, if an incomplete statement.
Turning, the lanky clown shouted back over his shoulder. "Hey, Troubleshoes! You've got a visitor!"
The name made Party Favor freeze.
True enough, it was Troubleshoes. The makeup was off but he still wore the clown's outfit of a yellow shirt with orange polka-dots, poorly patched green pants, and a pair of comically oversized shoes. Despite it all, something in the back of Party Favor's head shouted that the big stallion looked wrong without his signature hat.
Troubleshoes looked down and his eyes went wide. "...Party Favor?"
The disciples of Starlight Glimmer were few in number but dedicated. They had been let down by society, by fate, by the nature of ponies themselves. And so they believed in their new path with a passion that could not be matched. The problem is that they were still so few in those days - barely a dozen. Hardly enough to sustain their town of the future. Starlight assured them that there were kindred spirits throughout Equestria - thousands, easily - but they had to find them and break the conditioning of generations.
This is what had brought them to Appleoosa: searching out those souls who needed their help and Starlight's guidance. (In truth, they were mostly in Appleoosa because the train stopped there to resupply before continuing on to the far more populous Dodge City.) What was laid out before them was… bare. Appleoosa was mostly a name on a survey map at this point, a town struggling to bring itself into existence. The trading post had been around for generations - long before the train station - as a central point where the scattered ranches, farms, and frontiersponies could bring their goods to ship back towards civilization. It had been only recently that more of a town had started to spring up. The 'town' was still just a single street of buildings - a bar, a hostel, a dry good store, and so on - that ran between the train station and the scattered bleachers that served as the fairground-slash-arena. But it was a town and the ponies cared about it.
Party Favor did, too. He didn't care much for the dry, hot weather but the town itself was nothing like home. (That was a good thing - Party Favor didn't have any positive memories of 'home'.) It was a place just enough like the so recently built Our Town that he was immediately endeared to it.
Shortly after arriving in Appleoosa, the group had split up. Starlight had taken Night Glider in one direction, while Party Favor and Double Diamond had gone the other. Explore, find something to eat, find possible new converts. That was the plan.
For about five minutes.
Then Double Diamond - already sweating and complaining about the heat - abandoned Party Favor so he could rest inside the hostel. So he was alone in a remote town with minimal direction. But he had a task and Party Favor believed.
The first pony he talked to didn't even slow down walking to listen. The second didn't either but did toss him a bit, probably assuming his shabby cloak meant he was a beggar. Ponies three through five didn't end up any better, but Party Favor soldiered onward.
He met number six on the edge of town - a gargantuan stallion who was staring at a messy pile of food and debris on the ground. The cause was obvious: his saddlebag had split, spilling his possessions into the dirt. Rather than scramble to retrieve them, he simply stared languidly and sighed. "Figures," he said with the weight of years.
Party Favor's heart jumped. He recognized that tone. He'd spoken in it. It was the sound of somepony who'd been beaten down by life and had lost all hope. Just like Party Favor had been before he met Starlight Glimmer.
"Hello friend!" Party sauntered up beside the stallion, his planned pitch interrupted as he realized just how huge he was. Party Favor barely came up to the giant's hip.
Sad, soulful eyes turned to the smaller stallion. "Oh. Hi. Sorry if I'm in the way. I'll get a move on in a moment."
"No!" Party Favor surprised himself with how fast that popped out. "I, um. I mean there's no need to rush, friend. I actually came over to see if you were okay."
The giant shrugged. "Fine enough." He glanced down at the pile of stuff. "'Bout average, really." He spoke with the somber depression of somepony who'd never had a good thing happen in their life.
And it sang the same tune as Party Favor's heart. His horn lit, picking up some of the food out of the dust. "Let me help."
"Why?"
The suspicion in his voice was unmistakable and familiar. Party Favor smiled back. "Is it wrong to help a friend?"
"We're not friends." Suspicion turned into guarded defense. "I don't even know your name."
"Party Favor." He volunteered it without hesitation. "What's yours?"
The giant's response was slower, held back as he considered the situation. But after a few seconds, he found no harm in it. "Troubleshoes."
"Well Troubleshoes," Party offered, floating up a slightly scuffed apple, "Do you mind a little help with your goods? From somepony who thinks you could use a friend."
The nod was hesitant - but still a nod.
They carried it all back to Troubleshoes' home - a wagon too small for a pony his size, set just far enough away from the young town to be inconvenient. The interior was a mess and a menace - Troubleshoes had alluded to his poor luck and the disrepair spoke to how often he'd trip and fall, yet he also seemed to insist on putting fragile and heavy objects above his considerable head height in perfect positions to fall on him from.
Still, it was his home and the giant visibly relaxed once he entered it. The groceries were set on what passed for a kitchen counter, while the rest - revealed to be several replacement dishes, a new pillow, and several rolls of duct tape for repairs - were left on a table with a severe wobble and one leg replaced by half a broken chair. (The remaining three chairs were all intact if visibly battered.)
Troubleshoes considered for a moment. "Well. Would be pretty rude if I didn't offer you a drink for helping me carry that all back. Don't got much, though. I've got coffee and… coffee."
That caught Party Favor off guard. "No water?"
"There's a river nearby," came the languid retort. "But the handle broke off my last bucket right after I made coffee. They didn't have any at the store to replace it with."
"...Coffee it is." Party didn't argue.
So the stove was turned on to reheat the coffee, leaving the two without words for a few minutes. Party Favor knew he should start talking and make the pitch, but something about the big stallion's slow, burdened movements hushed him to silence.
On the stove, the coffee pot burbled weakly and Troubleshoes took it off to pour. There was a softly muffled yelp of pain as the hot pot burned his lips, but the stallion still poured two mugs without further complaint. A mumbled thank you was given and then they sat in silence for a minute more.
After a sip, Troubleshoes broke the awkwardness. "So what's the reason you decided to help me? Not to look you in the mouth, but you're no local and you've no reason to do anything for me."
A thousand of Starlight's speeches sprang to Party Favor's mind and all rang hollow. Sure, he'd reached out with the intent to recruit, but now that he had the moment in front of him? He found himself stumbling. "I guess…" Another hesitation as he stared into the mug. "I've had a bad day, too."
Troubleshoes snorted. "Ain't had nothing but bad days ever since I got this dang cutie mark."
Party Favor's breath hitched. There was no way it was that easy. "C-cutie mark?"
Troubleshoes turned his flank - narrowly missing toppling over a stack of books - to show the mark in question. A green horseshoe. "Been bad luck the whole time. Upside down, you see. Just rotten luck through my whole rotten life."
Mouth dry, Party Favor could barely bring himself to reply. "I understand that, too."
"Do ya now."
Party looked down at his coffee, speaking even as he pushed down the memories. "I had a lot of misery in my life. Rejection and anger and yelling… so much yelling. But my cutie mark said I was supposed to be happy. It kept telling me I should smile and make others smile even while my life was miserable. I… I hated it." He took a deep swig - then broke out coughing as it went down the wrong pipe.
Troubleshoes leaned over, thumping him on the back to help clear it. As he did, his eyes went down. "That mark don't seem so bad."
Oh. Right. Party Favor wiped his mouth. "That's because it's not mine." The look of confusion Troubleshoes had was common enough. "I met this amazing pony, Starlight Glimmer. She found a way to change a pony's cutie mark." He took a deep breath. "She removed mine and sealed it in a crystal. She did it for all of us that follow her, so we can all be free."
The concept normally horrified ponies - most of them had been conditioned by society to love their cutie marks. The few that were open to the idea still usually hesitated. Party Favor himself had waffled over the idea for days, even knowing how much it would help him. But Troubleshoes? The moment that idea hit his brain was like a firework. His response wasn't disgust or fear - it was relief. It was joy. And Party Favor saw him smile.
(Far, far away, a balloon-shaped cutie mark sealed in stone pulsed with energy.)
It was a beautiful smile. It changed the entire shape of Troubleshoes' face, washing away the morose weariness that made him look a decade older than he was. He was a huge stallion and his smile was just as large. But his voice in that moment was tiny. "She can just take it away?"
Party Favor's heart lurched in his chest. "She can. She took mine. Other ponies', too."
"I want it."
It was the first time Party Favor had heard that. He'd heard ponies consider it, accept it, allow it - never want it. The next words slipped out. "Your life's that bad?"
Troubleshoes' smile faded to that frown he wore so easily. Tired eyes panned over the rickety, beaten wagon, guiding Party's own on a tour of the sad state. "Bad enough."
"A pony like you deserves better."
That seemed to grab Troubleshoes' attention. "A pony like me?" Doubt crept back into his voice.
"Well, I– I mean…" Party Favor stumbled over himself, tongue and brain each scrambling without coordination. He settled for motioning at Troubleshoes to buy himself a few seconds. "I mean look at you! You're–"
"A mess."
"Amazing."
The words came from different sources at the same time. Troubleshoes blinked. "Amazing?"
Party swallowed hard. "Amazing." He took the plunge. "You're strong, good looking, you've got a great smile and a voice that just hums in my ears when you speak. Unless you're secretly a jerk or tribalist, you seem like you deserve a lot better than you've gotten."
The words were out, and Party Favor cringed back. Now he'd done it. He could have made Starlight proud of him with a new recruit, but he'd stuck his hoof in it.
Troubleshoes' response was slow. Thoughtful. Torturous. But somehow? Positive. "Well if you're trying to butter me up, you're doing a right decent job of it." He snorted a little laugh. "Not that you need to, I'm already sold."
Party Favor laughed too - mostly with relief. "Sorry, I just… I was worried you'd take that the wrong way."
"Coming from a handsome fella like yourself? It's too kind." Troubleshoes gave him a little smile - not the huge hopeful one from before, but still enough to light up the room.
The thoughts in Party Favor's head scrambled like an egg, clambering for control and all failing. "Uh."
Troubleshoes' face fell. "Um, I mean, if–"
Party sat bolt upright, fearing the moment might slip away. "No! No, it's– it's okay. I just didn't expect, um. That."
A few seconds of awkward silence passed.
"Would you… should we talk about it?" Party Favor ventured out the idea carefully, ready to yank it back at the slightest sign of resistance.
Troubleshoes thought. "I think I'd like to. But maybe second. Thinkin' I'd like to meet this Starlight Glimmer first and get that resolved. Otherwise my rotten luck's just gonna ruin another thing."
Party Favor laughed. Troubleshoes didn't.
The trip back to down was full of awkward glances and half-words as neither was entirely certain what to say or how to say it. Both were still trying to feel the other out, caught in between budding interest and the defensiveness of rough past experiences. Little more happened between them by the time that they arrived and found Starlight Glimmer.
She greeted Troubleshoes with the same enthusiasm and friendly smile she'd given Party Favor all those months ago. Then she thanked the unicorn for the introduction and sent him to check in with Double Diamond while she spoke with Troubleshoes. The parting of the two stallions was a lame 'see you later' as their paths deviated.
In the room, Double Diamond was still laying on the bed and desperately fanning himself to stay cool. He'd been there all day and made clear he was uninterested in moving further for any reason. He was at least able to give Party Favor an update on the group's plans: stay the night and head out for Dodge City on the morning train. There would be enough time now to relax, eat, and have a lengthy talk. That suited Party just fine.
Halfway through grabbing a meal - a hearty and rustic stew with amazingly fresh bread - was when everything went wrong. Starlight Glimmer practically slammed into Party Favor. "We're leaving," she announced. "Grab Double Diamond."
"When?" He was barely able to get that out.
"Now," was her reply. "The train leaves in eight minutes and we're going to be on it."
She never fully explained why they'd left in such a hurry. Nor did she reveal why Troubleshoes wasn't with them when they did - not until they were well on the way to Dodge City. When he tried to bring it up, Starlight shut Party Favor down with a hard glare and the angry story that the gentle giant had balked at the last minute, turning angry and aggressive when she had gone to take his cutie mark. They had been forced to flee because of him - he had threatened Starlight before going to find the sheriff.
It seemed impossible to believe but Party Favor didn't argue. Starlight was in charge, after all. She knew best.
But it was the first moment that Party Favor doubted her.
It would be three years before that doubt would come to a head and three more before he returned to Appleoosa.
Troubleshoes did take the time to rid himself of the clown costume before they took a walk. Squeaky shoes would have made their awkward conversation even more so.
"Always figured it was just my luck you disappeared like that." There was no malice in Troubleshoes' voice, just resignation. "Can't have your hopes crushed if you don't have any, after all."
Party Favor cringed. "I'm sorry."
"Not your fault." Troubleshoes shrugged in a way that hurt Party's soul. "Just my rotten luck. As usual."
"I'm still sorry."
That ended their words for a little while as they left the arena and got out into Appleoosa's streets. The sounds of the rodeo and cheering crowd faded as they continued on, heading down a familiar path - the way to Troubleshoes' wagon.
Words resumed halfway there. "I tried not to think about why you left like that," commented the giant. "Still did. Never could make sense of it."
That, at least, was easy for Party Favor to answer. "Starlight said you got angry with her and that you tried to attack her, so we had to leave immediately."
"I would never!" Troubleshoes stopped walking, recoiling at the very thought. "Maybe she was just mad at me for spilling my drink?"
"Your drink?" Party Favor frowned, trying to think back across the years. He was pretty sure Starlight hadn't mentioned any drink. "Could you tell me what happened? In your words."
A breeze blew some dust past them, rustling the leaves of the still new apple orchard that stubbornly grew out of the scrubland. "Well, she and I were gonna talk about the whole thing and decided to stop in at the Salt Lick to do it. We sat down, ordered a drink, and she started giving her pitch. About halfway through the drinks arrived and, well, you know my luck. Accidentally spilled mine all over her. She got real freaked out and said she had to go to the bathroom and clean up. Never came back, and by the time I went looking you were gone too."
Party Favor thought more about it - and he almost laughed when he realized things. "Did you spill it on her flank, by any chance?"
Troubleshoes nodded. "Yup. Got it all over that funny cutie mark of hers."
And Party Favor laughed. Because what else could he do? "Starlight said we had to run because of that!" It took him a few seconds to restrain the laughter enough to clarify, but even then he couldn't help but smile at the absurdity of it. "Starlight faked taking away her own cutie mark. She lied to us about it and covered it with makeup. So you spilling that drink washed it away and she probably thought you were going to blow her cover. That's why she abandoned you and had us leave so fast. She was afraid you knew the truth."
Then Troubleshoes did something Party Favor had never seen him do: he pouted. It was adorable. Like watching a bear beg for treats. "But I didn't know a thing!" Celestia save, he even whined cutely. "I had no idea!" He kicked a rock, sending it careening into the fence that separated orchard from road - and then rebounded back and smacked him right in the knee. Troubleshoes grimaced and pronounced that same mantra: "Just my damn rotten luck."
Party Favor - trying to restrain his amusement - patted Troubleshoes on the flank (as he couldn't reach the shoulder.) "Hey. My bad luck, too. I was stupid enough to trust her and listen to her."
Troubleshoes squinted. "Way you say that means things changed, I gather. You're looking a lot more, uh, vibrant than you did back then, too."
"We learned what she was doing to us. Eventually." All the amusement was gone now, replaced by a mix of shame and regret. "It took years and help from Princess Twilight, but we realized what Starlight had done to us and turned ourselves around. We took our cutie marks back, threw her out, and started making a better life for ourselves in Our Town."
The capitals were missed, but Troubleshoes still nodded. "Good. That's good." He gave Party Favor a little side-eye. "So you're happy there now?"
"A lot more than I was when we first met." Party Favor smiled - then quickly backtracked. "Not that I– uh, I mean…" He took a deep breath to regather his thoughts. "I'm happy. A little lonely, but happy."
Troubleshoes considered it. "And that's why you finally came around to look old Troubleshoes up again?"
There was the urge to lie. Party Favor didn't. "No, there's something else." His eyes pinched closed.
"Figures." Troubleshoes sighed. "Guess that's my luck, too. You finally come back into my life and it ain't even for me."
They lapsed into silence again, this time not even walking. It didn't feel right to Party Favor to continue on to Troubleshoes' home when the rift between them was there.
But Troubleshoes had no such problem. After a minute he slowly started off again, leaving Party Favor behind.
He was ten trees down when Party finally worked up the courage to speak. "I thought you'd gotten over me!" It was enough to make Troubleshoes pause. Not turn, but at least stop walking. "It took years for us to understand what Starlight had done and to take back our lives from her. You and I? We never had more than 'I'm interested' and 'we should talk'. I'd assumed you'd gotten on with your life. That you probably wouldn't even remember the random pony stupid enough to believe in a cult that had ditched you after two hours."
"The random pony who actually showed me a little bit of care," Troubleshoes pointed out. "Who actually put a touch of effort into things. Asking about my life, saying he was a friend. Somepony who said he understood the pain of a rough life and meant it."
Party Favor had no response to that.
"I didn't wait for you or anything. But there sure wasn't anypony else who came knocking at my door in the meanwhile. Didn't have a pony that even considered the word 'friend' until about two years ago. Even now, it's mostly just the work. They're good folks but not much I'd call friends." Troubleshoes snorted. "Certainly not more than that."
"I'm sorry." It was a repeat and a lame one at that. Party Favor knew it, but he didn't know what else to say.
Troubleshoes sighed. "I know you are. I don't blame you, either. What you said's right - we never had something to lose out on."
Party Favor took a deep breath. "Sure there was. We lost out on time. First because I was stupid enough to listen to Starlight Glimmer and then because I was stupid enough to think you wouldn't even remember me."
"Hey." Troubleshoes turned around to set his eyes on Party Favor. "Don't call my friend stupid."
"Even if I am?"
A few massive strides closed the gap between them again, and the giant towered over the unicorn. "Mistakes don't mean you're stupid. I make plenty of mistakes, too. You gonna call me stupid?"
Party Favor snorted a laugh. "No."
"Then you ain't either." Troubleshoes leaned down, setting his forehead against Party Favor's.
They stood there like that, beside the apple orchard. The breeze gusted again, carrying with it the scent of transplanted loam, spicy sagebrush, and a hint of sweat from the heat.
Party Favor didn't move. Didn't open his eyes. "Do you still want to have that talk?"
"I reckon it's a bit overdue," Troubleshoes confirmed. "Plus you said you came here for another reason and I'd hate to not help a friend out."
That got a small laugh. "I think one talk's a little more important than the other."
Pinkie Pie (Laughter Incarnate) banged her squeaky hammer gavel on the table. "Hear ye, hear ye! I now call this meeting of the Council of Party Ponies to order!"
"I'll have a tomato and feta on rye!" Cheese Sandwich (Desperado of Delight) seemed pleased with himself for the joke, even though he had made a similar one every time the opportunity came up. (He insisted he was just practicing for when he would eventually need to make dad jokes, which in turn made Pinkie Pie blush and everypony else insist he didn't need any more practice, please stop.)
Pinkie Pie bopped him on the head with her mallet. "Secretary Spoon, if you could please read today's agenda for us?"
Silver Spoon (Tea Party Expert) sighed heavily and picked up the pad of paper. "The list of bullet points says 'party' seventeen times."
"Excellent! Then we'll begin with topic number one!" Pinkie Pie pulled a cord and the room was showered in confetti.
It made Party Favor (Master of Balloons) laugh with even more boisterousness than usual. "And just what are we partying about, Madame President?"
Pinkie Pie's wink was saucy as pasta. "I'm pretty sure you can figure it out from where you're sitting."
Party Favor made an over-exaggerated "Hmmmm" before looking down at his seat.
Troubleshoes (King of Clowns) looked up and shifted his coltfriend in his lap to a slightly more comfortable position.
And Party Favor shrugged. "Nope, no idea!"
Off on the other side of the table, Silver Spoon put her head in her hooves. "I swear, I'm going to have to start dating just so I'm not constantly outnumbered here…"
Author's Note
First a nod to PatchworkPoltergeist and The Silver Standard for the concept of Silver Spoon as a party pony. I almost forgot to note this as that's become so ingrained into my head canons that I forgot it wasn't actually canon.
Also a thank you to the various douchecanoes who decided to whine in the site post about this contest. I wasn't actually going to enter, but your complaints made me write this out of spite. I have made the world a little gayer explicitly because of you.
