A Truly, Truly, Truly Outrageous World

by Wing Dancer

Rating: teen
Tags: Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other, Lyra, Comedy, Adventure, Crossover
Length: 6889

Taric, the Gem Knight, was brought to Equestria via Twilight Sparkle.

Taric, The Gem Knight, felt the calling of the Summoners. With his mind open and battle gear in hand, he embraced the light that took him away, far away to the Fields...that were not those of Justice.

League of Legends crossover.

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Image by Bucklerpony at deviantart!
Edit and proofread by Haerdalas. Thanks!

Published 2012-12-02 12:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-12-29 12:49:38 UTC

Prologue

Taric, The Gem Knight, felt the calling of the Summoners. With his mind open and battle gear in hand, he embraced the light that took him away, far away to the Fields...that were not those of Justice.

Taric, the Gem Knight, esteemed and well known hero of the League of Legends, was enjoying yet another peaceful day, traversing one of the many Valoran cave systems. His gem encrusted armor cast an eerie, blue light on the irregular walls surrounding the champion. A nearby pool of crystal clear water was disturbed by a drop falling from one of the many jagged stalactites hanging from the ceiling. The silence was disturbed only by Taric's armored footsteps.

The knight enjoyed exploring such fine caves. He heard the call of gems deep from within, their magic speaking to him in ways others could only wish to experience. His vibrant blue eyes slowly took in the beauty of it all – people have yet to find this place and ruin it with their pickaxes, chisels and greedy hands. They did not understand the nature of earth and its treasures. Beauty should be set free and appreciated in its natural form.

As he ventured deeper into the darkness, he whispered to his armor, causing it to shine brighter than  before. Everyone accused Taric of being a hypocrite – if gems were to be left alone, why did his armor contain so many and of such great quality? They did not understand his answer, nor were they even willing to hear it.

Gems held magic. A different, primeval type of magic. It served no man and no creature, evil or good. It lived its own life, an existence that originated during the birth of the very ground beneath his feet. As such, it had its own mind and mysterious plans, some of which even the Gem Knight did not understand. It was apparently one of the magic's plans for a young Taric to wander one day into a cave, and witness a cave-in that trapped him for two days and two nights beneath the ground.

During that time, especially at dawn and dusk, Taric heard a calling, something that compelled him to move deeper into his tomb. In total darkness, he did not trip nor fumble once, as if led by the mysterious sounds. As despair slowly began to creep its way into the knight's heart and mind, he saw a soft, blue light right behind a corner.

The light turned out to be something beyond amazing. In a pool of water so clear it looked like it wasn't there, there lay gems. Sapphires that hummed the same song that drew Taric into the cave called out to him harder than ever before. They had the perfect form and shape, as if a master artisan worked on them for weeks on end. But why would such precious stones end up dumped into a forgotten cave?

Without a conscious thought, the knight reached out for a gem, the water around his hand cool and soothing. He lifted up a single sapphire, holding it gingerly between his thumb and index finger. Taric never saw anything as beautiful and graceful ever before in his life.

Without haste and with utmost care, the future Gem Knight deposited the gems into a pouch made from his shirt. It was not the most fitting of containers for such treasure, and Taric kept apologizing for such treating. As the last gem left the pond, the knight heard a shifting sound behind him and the earth beneath his feet trembled.

With the gems held firmly by his stomach, Taric returned the way he came, with a soft blue light shooing away the darkness before him. As he reached the collapsed part of the cave, he found that the boulders moved ever so slightly, but enough for him to squeeze through and towards freedom.

His body was bruised and blood leaked from the many scratches he had sustained, but he made every possible effort to keep the gems from harm. He escaped and lived to tell his tale, one that no one ever believed.

A cracking sound beneath his foot caused Taric to snap out of his memories. The calling was stronger here, somewhere inside the wall he was looking at. His armor resonated in response to the sounds, creating a beautiful song that very few could appreciate. The sounds were joyful, making Taric feel like he had witnessed two relatives reunite after a very long time. The knight came closer, closing his eyes and placing an ear on the solid, cool rock.

The symphony of sounds created a vibrant and colorful image in his head, with rainbows shifting in and out of sight. They reminded him of the night sky auroras, drifting through space far above the earth. Here, deep down underground, he could almost touch this fantastic phenomenon, feel it as cool air breezing through his senses.

Taric's moment of bonding with the earth was interrupted however by a different type of call. This one was more firm, majestic, blinding him with a purplish light that stroke from the heavens. It was a signal that the knight knew well, and welcomed with a gentle smile.

The League of Legends has called upon him again. His shield would protect the weak against the wicked. His hammer would cause tremors in the hearts of his enemies. The magic of earth would erode the wall of resistance stretched before him, sending whatever foes he would face back from whence they came.

Before the purple light enveloped the Gem Knight completely, Taric managed to spare a single thought:

Hopefully I'll lead the charge with Ezreal again. He is truly, truly a remarkable hero.

* * *

Usually during a summoning, the hero felt nothing – it was like being cast to a void, only to reappear again with your feet firm on the cold stone of a summoning platform. This time, it was different. And troubling.

Taric felt as if he was being pulled somewhere upside down. There was no ground for him to feel or look at and the feeling of vertigo made him nauseous. He could not help but feel that he was rolling around, cast onto a purple stream that was neither hot nor cold, but crushing him nontheless. He could not breathe and felt his hands and feet give way to the pressure. His face was being sucked  outside by an invisible force, and his brain was trying to escape through a coin sized point on his forehead. His posterior was hurting and the knight actually got worried that at one point he might have done something undignified.

The constant whirling and pain that seemed to last forever stopped abruptly, replaced by the feel of something hard slamming into his whole body. Usually things slamming into his frame wasn't a big deal – the magic of earth protected him, along with the best thick Demacian armor Taric could afford.

The impact left the knight breathless. His whole body was sore and felt twisted, as if a carriage of many horses ran over him many, many times. The knight was afraid to open his eyes, if he even had those after this perplexing event. Where was he now? He did not hear the shimmering of the Summoning Crystal. These were not the Fields of Justice. Nobody rushed to his aid to see what was going on. There was only silence.

As his body regained its ability to feel again, it made use of that power to scream with utter pain. That signal was quickly shoved to his mouth that cried out in an alien voice. Taric was proud of his deep, soft voice, sometimes referred to as a “balm for shattered nerves”. The sounds coming out of his throat now were not only ungraceful, but also slightly higher.

To Taric's surprise, another voice churned in, also screaming. It sounded like a woman in distress, which was the knights specialty. In an instant he decided to put aside his current state and help the maid before anything else. That was his code of honor. Put the needs of others before his own.

With a valiant effort, the Gem Knight opened his eyes which were immediately assaulted by bright sunlight and an unknown scenery. Squinting, he saw a wooden floor, wooden walls with glass windows and books. Lots and lots of different colored spines sporting some strange symbols. And closer, much closer, there were four horse feet. They were purple.

“Ohmygosh ohmygosh ohmygosh!” sounded a female voice from above. It was probably the steed's rider that was in trouble.

The knight made another great effort and lifted his head. Staring right back at him were two lavender eyes under a storm of purple hair. Protruding from that mess was a horn of a darker shade of purple.

The horse opened its mouth and a voice sounded. “Ohmygosh, what happened?! The spell...deh,” gasped the voice, one that seemed to come out of the horse's mouth.

Now, Taric saw many interesting things on Runeterra and the Fields of Justice themselves. There were gods and demons, yordles and creatures from the deep sea. Yes, even unicorns, albeit usually white and a lot taller. A talking unicorn was a possibility, but Taric never heard of such a creature. Was it a mutation? Was it some kind of evil beast? Some kind of trickery magic?

“Are you alright?” finally asked the horse, taking a step back and standing on edge with a forehoof put to its mouth. “I'm really sorry, I-I don't know what went wrong! Spike!”

As the frazzled beast was looking left and right, Taric finally paid more attention to an urgent voice inside his head. He felt something he hadn't felt in a long time. He was butt naked.

With a jolt he tried to stand up, putting hands over his exposed privates. With a surprised yelp he felt hard objects collide with his jewels and posterior, right before he lost balance and loudly collapsed back to the floor.

“Sweet sun!” gasped the unicorn, taking a few steps towards Taric and putting a hoof to his face. “Are you alright? Sun and moon, I'm so sorry! I-I'll fix this, just let me-SPIKE!” called out the horse, its muzzle expressing confusion and distress.

The Gem Knight himself wore a similar facial expression. Slowly, he drew his hands to his face. For some reason a pair of pale hooves crept into view. They were covered in white fur. And, somehow, they obeyed Taric's mind when he ordered them to stop advancing. The knight stared at these strange appendages, a small spark of understanding rushing towards a motherload of explosive realization.

Hope and denial pushed his head to turn and look at his back. All the way from his neck, through his back and feet, there was white fur. Where he expected to see a muscular back and perfectly shaped legs he saw the curvy body of a horse, ending with another pair of legs with hooves. There was also a brown tail protruding from his bottom that was lying on the floor, unmoving. On one of his butt cheeks he noticed a tattoo – a blue gem with waves emanating from it. This was all too much.

Unable to decide whether to scream in panic, fear, confusion or rage, Taric's mind decided to shut down his consciousness.

That was the first time Taric fainted in the land of Equestria.

Opal, for Harmony...

“But Twilight, you don't know what happened. Who is...”

“...stop ogling him so much Rari...”

“...the spell should have...”

“...um, excuse me, I think he's coming...”

Those and many a few other voices pierced the thick veil of Taric's dark world. The knight felt his head spin, and the throbbing in his forehead was something truly obnoxious. Little by little, he forced his eyelids to open.

At first, the image he saw was blurry. A haze of different colors, some of them forming outlines of certain animals he couldn't name. Blinking a few times sharpened his vision, revealing a bunch of horses standing around him, staring at him intently. Each equine was of a different color (one of them actually having rainbow colored hair), with big round eyes focused on Taric.

The knight recognized the unicorn from before – alongside it was yet another horned horse, with a white coat and purple mane formed into something that could be called a hairstyle. Next to them there were two pegasi, another rare type of creature that existed on Runeterra. These horses had smaller wings compared to the ones he recalled from history classes. Could they actually use those to fly?

The last were two regular horses, one of which stood out with a crazy puffy pink mane and something that, should it be a human face, could be considered an ear-to-ear grin.

“He's awake! He's awake!” shouted the pink horse, jumping up and down like a bouncy ball. Her high squeaking voice made Taric's head throb even harder, the pain somehow managing to extend past his forehead, in a cone-like shape.

The knight cautiously raised a hand to rub his temples, but ended up poking himself with a flat hoof. The weird part was that he didn't even touch his face yet.

Upon visual inspection, indeed, the hand-hoof was well in the air, touching something white and long that was aimed at his head. It had a spiral pattern on it, going all the way down and out of view. The object was firm and pressing against it caused a tugging sensation in his skull.

“Sweet diamonds,” uttered Taric in his alien voice, moving his hoof up and down the foreign object on his head. It was connected to his skull. It was in his head. “Call a medic! I have an arrow, or icicle or something that I can't quite describe stuck in my head!”

The horses looked at the knight with raised eyebrows. The man knew that screaming and panicking like a toddler taken away from its mother's breast was undignified. It didn't fit the tough and elusive image he has been building all these years, but for Terra's sake, he had something stuck in his head!

“What's up with him?” asked the cyan horse, pointing a hoof at Taric who by now was fruitlessly trying to grab the offending object on his head with both hooves. “He brain-damaged or something? Can he even understand us?”

“I don't know Rainbow. Please, settle down!” said the purple horse, shooing away Taric's flimsy hooves with her own. “Can you hear us? Can you understand what I'm saying?”

Taric looked over the obviously magical horses and replied: “Yes, I can, now help me get this thing out of my head. If internal bleeding doesn't kill me, head trauma will. And I'm not willing to become First Blood in. This-,” huffed Taric, struggling against the horse who kept his hands at his sides.

“Hey pardner, settle down a little. Twi here is tryin to help ya, ohkay?” spoke the orange horse and leaned over Taric. Only now did the knight notice that the creature had a brown stetson hat on her head. Twisted Fate would be pleased.

Surprisingly, the horse managed to pin down Taric's hands under steel hooves. Now he couldn't even so much as squirm, his vision partly obscured by orange hair.

“Thank you Applejack. But could you please move a little? I need to examine his horn” said the purple unicorn, looking at Taric's head intently.

“Sure thang Twilight. He sure is a squirmy one,” replied the knight's captor, moving a bit to the side, its whole face now in view. The horse had green eyes and Taric could swear it had its hair tied into a ponytail.

“Let's see here,” said 'Twi', drawing her muzzle close to Taric's and squinting. While she poked the object stuck to his head and looked it over, the knight noticed something. These beasts didn't smell as foul as the ones back in Runeterra. He instinctively crumpled his nose when the creature came this close, but when he finally had to take a bit of air in, he felt...shampoo. A nice fragrance, subtle and not too intense, even for his nose. A nose that obscured the bottom of his view and was another point in the agenda of “Figuring out what in Terra is going on here”.

“I'm sorry mister, but there doesn't seem to be anything physically wrong with your horn or head. Where does it hurt?” finally spoke up the Twilight, observing Taric's face with a worried stare.

“Horn?” repeated the dazed knight. His horn? What was his horn? Last he checked, there was nothing but perfectly styled hair on his head, and perhaps expertly plucked eyebrows over his baby blue eyes. No objects extruding from his skull whatsoever. “What horn? I don't have a horn.”

“Twilight, I think he's kinda,” said the rainbow colored one, making a spinning motion near its head with its hoof. “We should call the guards or have him sent to the hospital or something.”

“No!” interrupted the pink horse, bouncing into view and shoving aside the stetson hat wearing horse and the purple unicorn. With ease it embraced Taric's frame and lifted him up into the air. “He's a new pony in town! And the law says that new ponies have to have a welcoming party before anything else!”

“The law? But Pinky!” protested Twilight, picking itself up from the floor with a sour face. “He might be injured, or sick! We don't know who he is! Maybe somepony is looking for him? Look, he looks totally confused. Maybe he has amnesia?”

Indeed, Taric's elongated face did exhibit a certain degree of confusion. Simply put, he was lost. At some point he was even ready to believe this was yet another of Nocturn's tricks, sending him into a nightmarish trance, but this all seemed too tame for the daemon's work. Unless something would pop out of nowhere and attack him with a maw of sharp fangs.

“Pinkie Pie, you know Twilight is right. We need to get him to a hospital,” said a childish voice behind Taric.

As the knight turned his head around, still held in place by two pink hooves, the man again questioned whether or not this was Nocturne's work. And if it was, whether the beast was feeling out of form today or not.

Standing no more than a few feet away was a purple and green dragon-spawn. It was relatively small, but its fangs were quite visible, and the scaly tail looked like a formidable weapon. It wasn't particularly intimidating, but in his current state Taric could probably be beaten in hand-wrestling by an infant. Mainly because he didn't have any digits or a palm. Or a hand, or arm.

A sudden rush of panic made the knight struggle against his captor, the motion surprising the horse who let go of Taric with a scream. The hapless man flailed his hooves around for a split second before landing on the floor with a meaty slap. Everybody in the room cringed and looked away, closing their eyes slightly.

“Oh, my,” silently gasped a yellow Pegasus.

“Stand back gurls, Ah'ma gonna settle 'em down an then we'll decide what to do with 'em” said the orange horse, slowly approaching the Gem Knight.

The man was flimsily trying to grasp the mechanism of standing on four legs that contained more joints than he was used to and ended with inflexible and hard hooves. Each time he had two set on the ground, the others would slip or falter, sending his posterior or face down to the ground with a thud, increasing the knight's frustration and throwing timber to his forestfire of panic.

“Now pardner, just settle down. Lie down and stop hurtin' yerself, ya hear? We're not gunna hurt ya.” slowly and calmly said the stetson-hat wearing creature.

Taric could only grunt and hiss as he kept picking himself up and falling down, his legs wobbling around and escaping from underneath him. He was so focused on his task he did not notice an extended hoof until it touched his, uh, shoulder.

His body acted before he could register with his eyes or mind what happened. One of his forelegs flew forward, connecting with something soft. As in slow motion, he heard displeased voices and something thud to the floor. As he raised his head, he saw the cyan Pegasus with its wings flared standing over him. It was shouting something and for some reason it turned around.

Last thing Taric saw was a pair of horse frogs closing in on his face with blazing speed. Then the world went black without a sound.

* * *

The first sound that woke the knight up was a steady beeping. It sounded mechanical and was coming from somewhere to the right. After sound, there came light. Taric opened his eyes only to see five horses standing next to him. The rainbow haired one was near a wooden door, looking away, leaning on the frame with its hooves crossed on its chest. It looked kind of bizarre, this human pose.

The knight looked down, his consciousness connecting the tiny little pieces that were floating around in the void of his head. He was on a bed with green sheets. The side of his face was tender and hurt like hell.

“Girls, I think he's waking up! Finally!” complained the pink horse, its head bobbing up and down with excitement.

“Yes, the doctor said he would be fine, despite somepony trying to send his head to the moon,” said the white unicorn, directing its words to the creature at the door. It merely snarled something inaudible and exited the room, closing the door behind itself with a slam.

“Give it a rest Rarity. She was only tryin' to protect me and you girls. It was all just an unfortunate accident,” calmly concluded the orange horse, smiling slightly at Taric. “I know we was off to a bad start there, pardner. We were kinda all over the place and thang got out of hoof. Sorry fer that.”

Taric sat there quietly, still considering the situation he had found himself in. The possibility of this being an illusion was already out of question – after such a long time, he would already either be re-summoned or brought back to the real world by allied heroes.

“So, uh, I guess we should introduce ourselves,” continued the horse, seeing how Taric just stared at it with an absent gaze. “Mah name is Applejack. This here is Twilight Sparkle,” said the creature, pointing to the purple unicorn who blushed and plastered a weak smile to its face.

“Yeah. Sorry for dragging you down to Ponyville. I promise I'll fix this soon,” it said, slightly bowing its head and looking away.

“That's Pinkie Pie,” continued the orange one, pointing to the pink bouncing horse who literally exploded with a geyser of words that no sane person could possibly comprehend. The phrases that stood out the most were 'party', 'pony' and 'fun'.

“This here's Rarity,” said the stetson-hat wearing horse, somehow managing to silence its pink friend with a hoof.

“A pleasure to meet you, sair,” graciously said the creature, flipping its hair in a human-like mane and fluttering its long eyelashes.

“And the one who left us and, uh, roughed you up a little, was Rainbow Dash,” finished the orange equine, smiling along with the others at Taric. “So, what's yer name pardner? Where ya come from?”

Taric considered the horses words. If this was an illusion or trick, he could think of only one hero that could pull this off, and it was LeBlanc. If that was the case, the knight had no other choice but to play along, until he would be re-summoned or saved by one of his allies.

“My name, is Taric,” said the man in a calm voice, again noticing how alien it sounded. It was slightly higher than his usual soft tone, reminding him of his pre-adolescent years. “I come from a place not known to Runeterrans, so it matters not.”

“Runeterrans?” asked the Twilight Sparkle, cocking its head. “Who are they? Some ponies from the east?”

“Ponies? Hardly. Runeterrans are the inhabitants of this world. You know, waging wars, doing politics humans and creatures of different shapes and sizes?”

“Umm...I never heard of those before,” said the Sparkle, furrowing its brow, its eyes shifting from left to right like it was reading a book. “What is a hu-mane?”

Taric chuckled. Whatever the sorceress that was maiming his mind was trying, it would not be enough. The Gem Knight would not fall easily for such lame trickery.

“Creatures with two arms and legs, of course. Standing straight, wearing clothes, operating things with...hands,” sighed the knight, displaying his hooves and looking them over from both sides. He would have to live with these appendages, at least for now.

“Fascinating! You mean like monkeys? Tell me more about them! Where can they be found? What continent they live on?” asked the Twilight, its friends rolling their eyes or sighing and shaking their heads slowly.

“Monkeys? Are you serious, horse-unicorn creature?” asked the Gem Knight, raising his eyebrows. ”How could you not know of humans? They are the dominant species of this earth.”

“Huh? What do you mean?” The Sparkle cocked its head to the side and looked away. Its face slowly changed – its mouth opened and pupils dilated to tiny specks in a sea of white. It looked kind of terrified? Then, out of nowhere, it lunged forward, sticking its face close to Taric's. “Oh. My Gosh. You're not from Equestria. You're not from here! You're. You're-”

The beast jumped away and begun pacing around the room, talking to itself: “Sweet Sun and Moon, this is amazing! My spell, it was supposed to change a rock into a top hat. So, in theory, it had to replace one physical object with another. Somehow, somewhere, along the magical streams, the spell must have thrown an exception and handled it by borrowing and object instead of creating one! Yes! And I have no clue how it linked a top hat with a whole pony, but it did! Girls! Do you know what this means?!” exclaimed the Twilight Sparkle, its body shaking all over.

Taric and the Girls kept silent and stared at the purple horse with a nearly identical expression of doubt and confusion.

“This is a pony from a whole different dimension! I-I kind of...kind of invented a new spell!” squealed the horse and began prancing around the room in an utmost undignified manner, like a child that got candy.

“I am not a pony, or horse. I am a human,” calmly stated Taric, now drawing the equine faces to himself and stopping the purple one mid-flight.

“Wait, what?” asked the Twilight.

Emerald, for Insight

“Are you sure, doctor? Not even a tiny head trauma? Some minor amnesia? A mild case of post magic-radiation shock? Anything?” Twilight Sparkle begged a brown horse wearing a white lab coat. It was intently looking at some image, a skull of an equine creature with a horn. Taric figured that it must have been his head, since he was the main topic of the horses' – or ponies', as they liked to be called – chatter for the last few hours.

“Physically, he seems to be perfectly fine miss Sparkle,” replied the unicorn doctor, rubbing his chin. “No head trauma, no radiation, patient aware of surroundings and responsive. I don't understand his responses, but they are there, so that's no job for a regular doctor.”

“B-But how can this be? Maybe he's joking! Of course! You are joking about being a humane, right?” shot out Twilight, her big eyes and wide smile causing the knight to back away slightly.

“I am most certainly not,” he replied slowly, but firmly. “I have no memory of ever being a horse-”

“Pony,” automatically corrected an irritated purple unicorn.

“Pony,” accepted Taric, bowing his head slightly. “I never had more than two legs, nor do I recall having a hard, digitless palm. I can clearly remember my childhood and the teachings of my masters, all of which were without a doubt human. Also, as you can see, I am not well versed in the art of standing on all fours.”

“Guuh!” spat out the frustrated Sparkle, pacing around the room again. “But that is just impossible! The spell can't just change one being into another! It was meant to create, not summon and warp entities from different dimensions! It's not even in the algorithm!”

As the purple pony kept increasing the tempo of its rant, the horse doctor addressed Taric directly: “I guess that's all. You seem to be fine, and that bruise on your face will be gone in a day or two. That is, unless you get on the bad side of miss Dash again,” he chuckled, picking up some sheets and pictures with a glowing aura of magic. Steering clear of the flustered unicorn that kept walking in circles, the doctor bid his farewell and left the room.

“Umm, sir...Taric, was it?” unexpectedly asked the white unicorn closest to the knight.

“Yes?”

“Will you excuse me and Twilight for just a moment? We have some things to discuss regarding this unfortunate...situation. We will be right back,” she smiled, giving a curt bow and turning around. The horse stood near the path that the other one was following and gently guided its friend, who was all the while complaining and flailing its limbs around, to the door.

* * *

“Twilight Sparkle, can you please stop talking and focus here for a minute?” asked Rarity, directing her friend's face at her own.

Twilight blinked a few times, only now noticing the white unicorn and change in scenery. “What is it?” she asked sheepishly.

“Twilight, what are we going to do about this new pony?” asked Rarity, pointing towards the closed doors with her horn.

“I...I don't know? Guess we'll study him, get to know how exactly he got here and send him back,” blurted out Twilight, stopping for a second. “Or wait! Oh my gosh, I'm so stupid! This is someone from a totally different dimension, right!?”

“Yes, I think,” said Rarity, a bad feeling creeping up her spine. Every time Twilight got worked up over something, it could go two ways – either it would be a fine adventure, or Princess Celestia would have to fix a whole town fighting over an old pony doll. Again.

“We'll keep him here, in Ponyville! There is so much we can learn from him!” gasped Twilight, her eyes turning into giant black orbs, the possibilities rushing through her head with the force of a tornado. “We can learn history, art, craftsmanship, magic, culture, politics, law-!”

“Twilight!” exclaimed Rarity, shaking her friend violently out of her trance. “Don't get ahead of yourself just yet darling. First, we need to get to know this pony, or humane, or whatever. Whether or not he is dangerous. Can he be trusted. You know, the important things?” asked the white pony, accenting her last words with a wide and hopeful smile.

“Oh, uhhh, hm,” hummed Twilight, looking at the door with a slight frown. “Yeah, I guess that comes first. I'm not really that good with stallions. I mean, I get along with my brother, and Big Mac counts too, but other than that, I uh...”

To Rarity's surprise, Twilight lowered her head and blushed. The pristine pony knew that as far as books and the world of the mind were concerned, her magical friend was the best there is. But in the physical realm, where ponies had to interact with each other, she was still learning. And thanks to that simple fact, Rarity could go ahead with her plan!

“Darling, don't feel bad about it,” Rarity comforted, patting Twilight on the head. “We all have our strengths and weaknesses. And we all have friends who are willing to help us out.”

“Huh?” asked Twilight, cocking her head slightly.

“To put it bluntly, I'm really good with stallions,” smirked Rarity, flipping her mane. “I'll help you get to know our new friend here! This is just perfect! Sweetie Belle and her Crusaders are away on a field trip, so I have a free guest room to accommodate our otherworldly friend. While I get to know him and prepare him for your meeting, you can prepare whatever, uh, research you might have for him!”

“Are you sure Rarity? Just a second ago you said that he might be dange-”

“Oh, darling,” interrupted the mare, dismissively waving her words away with a hoof. “I am a lady, but I can surely take care of myself. Trust me, it will all be fine. The Carousel Boutique isn't that far away from the library, so you'll be able to check up on us from time to time. And I'm sure you'll be able to focus better without a strange pony poking around your precious books. Who knows what humanes do with books?”

“They do something with books?” perked up Twilight, again feeling Rarity's hoof patting her on the head.

“Don't worry darling, I’ve got you covered. Take your time and prepare, like you always do, and I'll show our friend the ropes of being a pony, hmm?”

* * *

Not long after the two ponies came back and presented their proposition, Taric got discharged from the hospital. The nurses and doctors took pity on the poor, fumbling knight who still could not stand on his new legs and supplied him with a wheelchair. Rarity the unicorn pushed it in silence, accompanied by her friends.

After crossing a small bridge that ran over a lake, Taric saw a settlement. Houses of all different shapes, sizes and colors were crisscrossed by dirt roads and adorned by flowers and shrubberies. The town looked peaceful and welcoming, and there were ponies walking about everywhere, talking to each other or squabbling near food stands. The knight was taken aback by the way the creatures acted – they seemed almost like humans, some of them even standing on two legs while bartering or showing something to each other. The knight understood their language, but could not make out the symbols that were written above certain structures. The writing, if it was indeed their alphabet, looked almost runic, with lots of sharp angles and complex objects put together in a tight formation.

“Welcome to Ponyville,” Rarity said briskly, smiling at Taric. The other horses smiled along. “I'll be heading home now, girls. Come by later to check up on our friend here!” called out the unicorn, waving her friends a goodbye.

The other ponies moved on while the knight and Rarity turned towards a building unlike the others around it. Its main colors were pink and blue, with some golden trims around the edges and many decorations that seemed 'too much'.

“Carousel Boutique,” said the white unicorn. “The home of Equestria's finest garments and fashion accessories. I just hope the girls didn't leave a mess before leaving, it would be so embarrassing in front of such a fine guest from another world.” The horse stopped pushing the wheelchair and faced Taric, who was taking in his surroundings with quiet contemplation. “If you would be so kind as to wait just a few short minutes...I'll just make sure that the girls didn't burn something up like last time,” giggled Rarity, swiftly hiding behind the front door.

The moment she was gone, Taric was startled by a pink blur in front of his face.

“Hi!” squeaked the horse known as Pinkie Pie. “I'm Pinkie Pie! Oh, but you already know that. What you don't know is that there is a party waiting for you at Sugarcube Corner! I made it just for you, since you are new to Ponyville and all.”

Taric opened his mouth to speak, but was again interrupted by Pinkie. “Wait! Oh no! You aren't new in Ponyville! You are new to Equestria. Ohmygosh! This calls for a totally different party! Or maybe two parties? Yes! Two! Oh, wait, I've got a better idea! You're not even a pony! So you're a new humane in Equestria that is a new pony in Equestria that is new to Ponyville! Three parties! Thisisgonnabeawesome!” squealed the pink-maned horse, jumping arround erratically.

The gem knight was too taken aback by the strange logic of the horse to even respond. A party? To welcome him to this world? He had no time for celebrations. He needed out of this illusion, back to his allies that could be losing on the Fields of Justice!

“Pinkie Pie!” came a voice from the door. Both Taric and the offending mare turned to see Rarity exit her boutique. “Please, stop bothering our guest. He's tired and probably overwhelmed by all this. The last thing he needs right now is a party.”

How very convenient, thought Taric, tuning out the two horses who were now arguing the merit of partying in different states of tiredness. The sooner I get out of this ‘world’, the better. Maybe the situation isn't completely lost just yet. Maybe time flows differently in this realm, and I won't be that far behind the others. I need to focus and find a way to escape, be it by will power or brute force - as undignified as it sounds.

“Fine!” hollered the Pink mare, pointing an accusing hoof at Rarity and heavily stomping away. “I'll let it slide for now! But remember,” she whispered in a ghoulish voice. “You. Pinkie. Promised.”

Chills ran up and down Taric's spine as he was being pushed through the open doors of Carousel Boutique. Illusion or not, that was the most horrifying 'threat' the knight has heard in his entire life.

* * *

The inside of Carousel Boutique was full with clothes and materials. There was a giant stage on which several horse-shaped mannequins were dressed in dresses of all sizes and colors. Some of them wore large, fancy hats, others had more subtle accessories. The things that caught Taric's eye the most were gems.

They were embedded in almost every dress. Sapphires, diamonds, emeralds, opals, even rare firegems or tanzanite gems were present. At first, the knight's temper flared. All these precious minerals were far away from home, strangled on plain pieces of cloth, or even lying in chests. Such mistreatment of holders of ancient magic would not go unpunished if he had any say in the matter.

Before righteous justice gave life to Taric's tongue however, his perked up ears made him pause. What was that sound? The knight knew the sounds of gemstones by heart – over the years he and the ancient magic had become close. At least, as close as an eternal entity governing the world can get to a mere mortal.

Why were the gems singing a song? And why did he not understand it? The knight closed his eyes and focused. Initially startled by his new ears twitching in every direction, he finally managed to focus on the colors and feelings that played out in front of his mind's eyes. Everything was alien. There were no patterns he recognized, and the magic seemed different. It did not have that hard tune of sagely might, that smooth texture of eons of events that had shaped it. The magic was much more vivid, louder, cheerful. It felt like a pebble taken straight from a brisk mountain stream. Cold to the touch, but bringing light and hope to the heart.

It was then that Taric realized something. This was no illusion. It could not have been. There was no other being, to his knowledge, that was both attuned to the ancient magic of earth as he was, and capable of casting an illusion such as this. The few entities he remembered who could, possibly, know enough about the ancient magics to add details such as the sound of gems, were incapable of illusions to anywhere near this degree. Simply put, all that he felt now could not be manufactured by anyone else. It was all very real. And different. In another plane of existence.

“Sir Taric? Hello? Are you alright?” asked a voice. It broke the trance in which the knight was in, causing him to shake his head violently.

“What?” he spurted out absent-mindedly, looking around again. Gems that sang an alien song. Pony costumes. Bright and vivid colors all around. A setting sun. A muzzle of a Rarity, looking worriedly at Taric.

“I asked if you liked it here. Darling, I do believe you were in, um, another place for a teeny tiny bit. Is everything alright? How are you feeling?”

“I'm,” started Taric, pausing to look down at his body. The white body of a pony. With hooves. And a nose that obscured the bottom of his sight. And the tip of a horn that was apparently part of his skull. “I'm fine. I think. I'm a pony.”

“Uhh...Yes you are, dear,” nodded Rarity, giving Taric a reassuring smile.