A farm hoof walks into a bar...
Hearts and Hooves Day is a day to celebrate love and spend time with your special somepony. It is a joyful day filled with cuddling, hugs, kisses and more heart shaped decoration than you can shake a heart shaped chocolate box at. Everypony enjoys Hearts and Hooves Day.
That is, everypony who has a special somepony. Those unlucky enough to be alone on that blessed day have three options: ignore the whole shebang and go on with their lives undaunted, find a date or, when all else fail, get blind stinking drunk.
That was Caramel’s plan as he hoofed it toward Berry’s bar that evening. Despite what one would expect, Berry’s bar was rather empty on Hearts and Hooves Day since all the couples were out to fancier places, or simply at home enjoying each other’s company.
If you know what I mean.
And so it was that Caramel passed the door and found only half a dozen patrons strewn around the establishment, nursing drinks in silence. One pony he was surprised to find was a certain stunning blue mare sitting at the bar. All six Elements of Harmony were beautiful in their own way, even the overtly muscular Raindrops had a charm of her own, but when pressed to pick the prettiest one of the six he always named the Element of Magic, Trixie.
Despite finding her quite attractive, he always considered her way out of his league, and he didn’t really imagine they would have much in common. She was from Canterlot, a budding politician and he was just a farm hoof that originally hailed from the poor parts of Detrot. It didn’t even cross his mind that his action could be interpreted as anything other than just friendly when he went to greet her.
“Good evening Miss Trixie,” he said, taking the stool next to her.
“I just want a quiet drink okay!” she snapped.
Caramel flinched and drew his head back at her harsh tone. “Jeez Miss Trixie, can’t a guy just say hello to somepony he knows while he orders a drink? I was just bein’ polite, I’ll get my glass and be out of yer mane, promise.”
Trixie glared at the stallion for a second or two before letting a sigh go and softening her expression. “I’m sorry… Caramel right?” She waited for the stallion to confirm with a nod. “It’s just I got hit on by two stallions and one mare since I got here… and that’s not mentioning what happened today,” she said, using a hoof to massage her forehead.
“Hey I understand. You just want some quiet time and some ponies just can’t get a hint. That’s how it is on Hearts and Hooves Day: every other desperate yahoo gets ideas. But I’ve been at the bottom of a bottle or two before, I know when to keep my distance,” replied Caramel with a grin, before his expression changed to one of puzzlement. “What happened to you today that got you into such a mood in the first place? That is, if you don’t mind me asking off course.”
Trixie seemed to ponder it for a second. “I got nopony else to vent to,” she said a shrug. “Everypony’s been trying to match me up today! Pokey tried to get me to go on a date with his brother, then Snails got this silly idea I should go out with his sister, but then Dinky and him got into some ridiculous argument about how Ditzy would be a better marefriend for me and they both decided I should take both on a date to test their theory out! It was a ridiculous and really embarrassing situation.”
The stallion turned to Trixie with a playful smirked. “You mean to tell me you aren’t going out with Raindrops already?”
Trixie’s eyes bulged out in surprise and she turned to look at Caramel in confusion. “Where’d you get that idea?!”
“Train station gossip rag,” he answered with a chuckle, "but don’t worry, I don’t really believe that kind of nonsense. I’ve been on the bad end of silly rumors like that. Just because two ponies stand together all the time doesn’t meant they’re going out or anything,” he added, rolling his eyes. “Gotta admit, I didn’t think a pretty mare like you would be single.”
Trixie blushed a little and turned away to hide her embarrassment. “I’m not that pretty,” she muttered. “It’s just… I’m not really interested in anypony right now and I got too many other things to think about beside from finding a date. Also I don’t want to do any of the icky stuff,” she said, sticking out her tongue.
Trixie got lost contemplating her half empty glass of bourbon for a second or two. Caramel sat there, unsure if he should talk about something else. He signaled Shaker to give his order and sat there a few seconds more. The unicorn decided to break the silence between them first.
“Big Mac rumor aside, how come you’re here all alone? I could swear I’ve seen you around town with a pegasus mare.”
It was Caramel’s turn to sigh dramatically. “Windwhistler… yeah… well it turns out we got some irreconcilable compatibility issue, so we had to take different path to find ourselves,” he said, waving his hoof around. “We broke up a few days ago.”
“Sorry to hear that,” said Trixie, hiding the fact she was curious what that issue could be.
“I want to be a father someday,” said Caramel, answering her unsaid question. “I want kids, more than one, a whole family ya know? Windwhistler didn’t really want kids, maybe one but that’s it… and... she said I’d make a terrible father. Said I’m just a freelance farm hoof who gets caught up in all sorts of stuff with Big Mac, that it’s not a life a responsible father should have.”
Trixie was a bit appalled at that. “That’s… that’s a pretty terrible thing to say.”
A heavy silence hung between the two.
“You know,” began Trixie, “I think I’d like to have kids too someday. My uncle and aunt raised me and they have seven kids. It wasn’t a big house, and we didn’t have a lot of fancy things, but I can’t imagine happier times. I’m not keen on making them myself but maybe I could adopt a couple of foals and give them a nice home.”
Caramel smiled at that. “I was an only child myself, and my parents had to work a lot to make ends meet, we didn’t have much either I guess. I didn’t really understand the value of family until I started hanging out with Big Mac and got to see his family. It made me want to connect with my cousins and other relatives. I want to share that stuff with a kid of my own someday.”
“So Big Mac’s not your boyfriend, he’s your big brother?” asked Trixie with a smirk.
Caramel chuckled. “Sure would make a better rumor I think.”
A cocktail glass was gently put before him at that moment.
“Sorry about the delay pal, had to run grab a bottle in the reserve,” said an apologetic Shaker.
“No problem at all buddy.”
He paid his drink, left a tip and turned to Trixie. He found himself wanting to learn more about the mare, her family, her History, how she came to be the pony that came to town and nearly wrecked the Longest Night festival before saving the world. But Caramel had given her his word, so he decided to be a gentlestallion and do as he promised.
“Well it’s been really nice Miss Trixie, but I guess you’ll want me to leave you to your drink now that I got mine,” he said, getting up from his stool.
“Wait! I…” began Trixie, looking a tad embarrassed. “I could use some company after all. If you don’t mind that is”
Caramel gave her a genuine smile “I don’t mind at all Miss Trixie.”
“Please, call me Trixie.”
Author's Note
And here we are! Happy Hearts & Hooves Day folks.
This story's crack pairing was inspired by randomly generated numbers. I also never wrote anything romantic before, so I decided to just keep simple and go with basic bonding. This isn't really a romance story, more like the begining of a romance story that will never be written. I don't know if I could ever continue this, and the Hearts & Hooves Day special concept was for short one shots anyway.
