Fallout Equestria: Medicine & Mail

Author’s Notes:

This is a companion chapter to Chapter Two-point-Five in Medicine & Mail. If you have not read at least through chapter two-point-five in the main storyline, then this perspective will not make any sense.

Chapter Two-point-Eight

Worlds End

“There is darkness, little one,

It exists in all our hearts, pony and minotaur alike.

Everyone falters and we may give in to it at times,

But never forget that Kindness will always bring the light.”

“Hello, Bit,” the pegasus spoke in a honeyed voice. “It’s certainly been a while.”

She softly hummed a few bars of a familiar song, her bluish mane bobbing to a beat only she could hear.

I looked on in confusion. A roiling fury broke the surface as it dawned on me who she was. I raged at the dark green mare and reared up, striking her face.

Her head struck the rough concrete wall leaving a bloody smear. She crumpled to the floor in a heap, a crooked grin spread across her features.

She lay there cackling before something unintelligible spilled from her lips. Blood flowed freely from her head staining the ground a deep crimson.

The mare looked up at me, her gold and silver eyes glinting treacherously in the dim light.

Her mouth twisted to speak and I screamed, bringing my hooves down on her once more.

I rolled off the bunk, my hooves missing the ground. I tumbled down to the floor unceremoniously with a grunt. Empty bottles of beer clattered across the room as my legs splayed out on the rough floor.

The previous day’s events played through my mind with crystal clarity. The knot in my stomach twisted suddenly at the thought of losing everything. My body had purged itself of the night’s binging, leaving a hollow existence where emotions rushed to fill the gap. I laid there listening to the sound of the early morning church procession filter in.

Light streamed in through a nearby hole-turned-window. I looked up from the floor and squinted at the sky, the corners of my eyes wet with tears, threatening to spill.

The world really does keep on moving regardless, doesn’t it?

Altar’s words came back to me suddenly. You’re going to fall and nopony will be around to help you back up.

I grunted, heaving myself up to my hooves and looked in the mirror. I peered back at a version of me strained by the last night, disheveled and mangy.

A light hunger pang crept at the edge of awareness. I made for the door, and bottles spun out of the way as my hooves met them.

I looked down at the empty bottles, void of liquid that once promised to take me away from all of this misery.

Food could wait.

Cold.

For being in the desert, why was it so fucking cold?

I shivered, curled up in the corner of my room, surrounded by a small mountain of bottles. The miasma of stale liquor caught my nose through the odor of sweat and unwashed pegasus.

I crawled up to my hooves, holding on to the side of a nearby table as leverage. I lurched forward and tried to blink away the haze. The world spun slightly and my balanced faltered. I immediately tilted back, falling on to my haunches.

Yesterday’s meager portion of dinner came up with the night’s alcohol.

I knew I should have felt something, anything. Instead I simply shivered and flopped to my side. My coat was embraced by new warmth, and stuck to me with a sour stench.

I closed my eyes.

Not enough.

Kicking aside a small pile of bottles, my temper spiked. I knew I had something left in here. I had to.

Empty. Empty! Emp—I picked up one and gave it a swirl. Sweet merciful rum.

I turned the bottle up and drank deeply. A knock sounded from door as it creaked open. I looked up and saw Vitia standing there, her nose wrinkled. Ugh, I forgot to relock the damn door.

“What d’you want?” I slurred at her.

Vitia looked to be on the verge of crying, “Bit—” she sniffled. “Bit Flip. I’m so sorry. This is all my fault, I didn’t mean for an—”

I flung the bottle. It shattered against the door, spraying the unicorn with flecks of glass and soaking her frame. “By Luna’s moon fucked—” My stomach lurched at the sudden outburst and threatened to relieve itself of the contents.

What are you doing, Bit? The little pony echoed in my mind.

“Just my luck,” I yelled at her while approaching, “It’s always my goddess damned luck!”

She backed away towards the door. “B-Bit, I—” tears rolled down her face. “If I hadn’t left Desert’s Edge, none of this would have ever happened. I’m so sorry.” She took a step toward me, lifting one hoof out.

“Damn right this is yer fault!” I reared back and my hooves struck her face. “Worst goddess damned roll of my life,” I spat. “I’d still have my home! Family! My entire life if I hadn’t met you!”

Vitia fell to her haunches and slowly backed out of the room before dashing off in a sobbing fit.

I hissed and took once more to the pile of bottles.

I sought the liquid bliss that only hard liquor could bring.

Stalking from my quarters, I wobbled up the steps towards the bar, my vision slowly swaying in front of me. Bush Whacker stood behind it rearranging bottles and jars.

I reached behind the bar to slide to me the bottle of Black Pony but came up empty. Bush Whacker pushed it further down the shelf.

“The hell, Bush. Gimme that.” I reached for the bottle again.

“Not happenin’, Bit. Willow has specifically told us to deny you any liquor.” The barstallion pushed back against my hoof. “You’ve had entirely too much. Go cool off in your room for a while. Perhaps take a shower.”

“Feh.” I spat and stomped off angrily. How dare they? Is it so much to ask to be able to drown away the last few days in peace?

I flung open the door to my room. “There’s gotta be something around here still.”

Empty. Empty. Empty!

I thrust my hooves into the pile. Glass cracked and bottles flew from it. One bounced off a table and pelted my side. As if fuel had been dumped over an open flame, anger burned inside of me and I lashed out, bucking wildly at anything I could.

My barding clattered to the floor as a table sailed into the wall.

My possessions spilled across the floor. Doc’s bottle of special brew and Hammer’s remaining jar of Scoot rolled to my hooves. I looked at the rest of my spilled inventory and smirked.

“Fine, if they won’t let me in the bar I’ll just make my own drinks.”

The crowd in the bar had grown to a considerable size. Alcohol lingered heavy in the air. Shouts and jeers from the throng overtook the music.

One of the younger initiate bouncer-monks lay doubled over on the ground groaning, clutching his stomach. The minotaur was beginning to bruise heavily from where I had bucked him.

That ought to teach the overgrown cow to get grabby with me.

I saw two more initiates rush me. One dove from the side. I stepped back and kicked off the ground beating my wings against the air. I spun to avoid the younger minotaur that had tried to flank me. He tumbled over the first initiate and sprawled out across the floor.

I dove at his head and landed on a horn with all my strength. The lounge echoed a crunching-snap and a screech of agony, overtaken by my sharp howl of defiance.

“BIT FLIP!” The roar came from behind.

I spun around in time to see a mottled gray fist. I could see where it would connect: every nerve in my body was on fire screaming at my fatigued muscles to move. I didn’t move in time. My world flipped, and I sailed backward, reeling. I crashed to the ground, legs splayed in all directions.

Ghost Ant hoisted me over his shoulder and clamped down tightly.

“Let m’go, Shorty!” I flapped my wings and thrashed. “Ah’m just tryin’ t’ have me a good time ’ere, y’stub-legged mini-taur!”

Ghost Ant struggled to keep my legs under control as I flailed about and bucked in the powerful minotaur’s grasp, trying to connect with something—anything fleshy. My free leg thrust out and finally met with something squishy that made a satisfyingly loud crunch.

“Ha! Booped you, fucker!”

“We have a bit of a problem here, Matron.” The gray minotaur intoned flatly.

“I see that.” Willow said in a soft voice as she stepped out from the crowd.

I glared at her as she approached.

“Oh, Bit,” she whinnied at me, a touch of sadness to her voice.

“Oh Bit-nothing,” I yelled. “Tell your height-impaired mass of brutish muscle to unhoof me!”

Willow sighed and nodded. I heard a brief whisper of apology from Ghost and barely registered the impact as the world went black.

I woke with a start and felt a dull ache along the edge of awareness. I shook my head to clear the mental fog and saw a mare standing next to me.

“Hello, Bit,” the pegasus said in a honeyed voice, “It’s certainly been a while.”

Crimson pooled around my hooves. I looked at the crumpled pegasus on the floor and took a few stumbling steps backwards.

“I would say ‘that was a surprise,’ but, well—” The voice behind me trailed off into ringing laughter as I landed on my haunches.

I tilted my head back to look at the voice and scrambled to my feet. “Yer dead, you shouldn’t be here.” I shook my head, trying to hold on to clarity. “Yer not real.”

“Me? Oh, I’m very much real, Bit. As real as anythin’ else,” she giggled and swept her hoof towards the cell door. I followed her motion and saw a frenzied Willow calling out to me. “It’s just that only you can see me,” the other me grinned as she cocked her head to the side.

My head pounded lightly. A dull, nagging pain crept up along my hooves where I had smashed the other pegasus’ head in. All of it persistent but far away. As if it wasn’t really me experiencing it.

This is tolerable. I’ve had worse. I can ignore this.

“Somepony else’s problem, right, Bit?” She sung the words.

I charged her. Our bodies collided against the wall and I felt another large stab of pain, then just as before, it subsided. My legs tangled with hers. I rushed to stand and slipped in a large smear of blood on the floor. Is this mine—

“Or hers,” the voice intoned flatly across the cell. “You really should stop, Bit. I mean that. All of it. All you had to do was wait, but no. You chose to gamble.”

Pain crept along the edge of my mind, slowly growing, threatening to take over my senses. “Still somepony else’s problem, isn’t it? It’s always somepony else’s problem,” the evergreen mare said quietly.

“Shut up!” I flung myself at her. We crashed against the wall once more and she slid to the floor giggling madly. Fog crawled along the exterior of my mind, slowly rolling its way in. I couldn’t think straight anymore, and making out details and connections was rapidly becoming more difficult.

“Bit, sweetie?” A crystalline voice pierced through my impaired senses.

In a panicked frenzy, I swung around with a leg out. I intended to strike whatever apparition my mind conjured up this time but was slammed back against the wall instead.

I hit the floor with a wet squelch. The dull pain spiked into a roaring inferno along my body. My breath came out in haggard sputters. The rough stone felt cool along my face.

I…I need to get up. Have to keep moving.

I looked up at Willow as she cradled my head. Her mouth was moving but I could hear nothing coming from it. She looked on the verge of tears.

Why?

The little pony in my head stood over me. “Somepony else’s problem,”she said.

I tried to get to my hooves but my body didn’t listen.

“Nngh.” I made a gurgling sort of sound as I opened my eyes. The morning light filtered in through the hole-turned-window.

How’d I get here? I searched my mind and vaguely remembered drinking, and then nothing.

How long have I been out? My entire body ached. A sharp pain flared from my head. Every muscle, every nerve ending screamed at me that something terrible had transpired but I could not remember what.

My mouth tasted faintly of iron. I tilted my head to the side and let out a wet, hacking cough. Flecks of blood spattered on the off-white sheet.

I squinted at the hazy, dust filled sky and tried to roll out of bed. Something snapped taut against the bed as I pulled, restraining me.

The straps bit into my hooves as I pulled harder. Panic rose up inside me as I thrashed about. I vaguely heard a shout.

Willow and Ghost Ant rushed into the room with another pony.

“Willow! What’s going on here, why am I—” I cried, tugging wildly against the restraints.

She said nothing. A look of sadness took her as I felt a sharp jab in my leg.

Within moments, I felt incredibly tired. I tried to keep my eyes open but my body wouldn’t listen.

It’s your problem now. I thought I heard the little pony in my head say.

I shivered and opened my eyes, the night sky greeted me. A desert breeze passed through the window, cool against my fevered skin.

What day is it? I had no idea. I had been floating in and out of consciousness so many times; it could have been a day, a week, or just a few hours.

At my bedside slept Vitia. She looked a right mess, her usually straight mane displaced and grimy around the edges. Vague memories of her frightened looks and my screams came to me.

I glanced down and saw the restraints on my hooves had been removed. It felt as if I had been running for weeks. My muscles ached as I tried to move my legs.

But I couldn’t. My body refused to listen to me and I was so tired.

I closed my eyes again.

The sounds of daily bustle of the Crags filtered in through my window. I heard the shuffling of hooves and a light snore coming from my bedside.

“Nngh,” I groaned, shifting my weight as I sat up and stretched my wings. The bandages on my head itched something terrible and I raised a hoof to scratch at them.

Willow placed her head against mine, “Oh Bit,” she whispered. I could feel the wetness of her cheeks against my face.

“Willow,” I whispered, my voice cracked. I found it difficult to speak, as if my body was having trouble moving the way it was supposed to. “What happened—why am I here?”

Tears began to well up at the corner of my eyes as she recounted the past week.

“I’m so sorry,” I whimpered out between choked sobs.