Sparkle No More (Alternate Ending)
1.1 Caring Princess.
Dear Twilight Sparkle,
I have been noticing that many of the reports you have sent in weren't as I expected. Everytime I get a new report from you, It's not what it should be.
This isn't you Twilight, is something bothering you? I can come down to the library and talk to you if you want, we can work this out together and fix it. I know you can do better, though I am dissapointed, it's not because of the reports, it's because I know there's something troubling you. When you send in your next report, please answer my question.
Princess Celestia.
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Dear Princess Celestia,
No, nothings troubling me. It's just that I've been working too hard from what I can tell. I'm sorry that my reports weren't as you expected, I'll be sure they are to be in your expectations. I'll keep that thought of me and you talking about anything wrong with myself. Thanks Princess.
Your faithful student,
Twilight Sparkle.
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[Twilight Sparkle]
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I haven't been getting sleep lately, doing all nighters every day of the week. It just doesn't seem to end.
All I have been caring about was my studies, nothing else but them. My behavior has been the worst it has ever been ever since I made studying the only major priority in my life. All month I've done nothing but study, study and you guessed it, more study. I just wish I wasn't such a feather to my friends, all they have been wanting for me to do is spend time with them and get fresh air and have fun, until recently I got so mad when they were all at my door while I was studying for a major test being developed by the Princess.
*Knock Knock Knock*
I gritted my teeth and closed my book with force and got up, too fast actually as my head was spinning for a brief moment while I walked down stairs. I opened the door with my magic with force and there I was face to face with 5 of my bestest friends.
"WHAT COULD BE MORE IMPORTANT THEN MY STUDYING?! MAKE IT QUICK!" I shouted.
My friends jumped as I yelled at them, myself knowing that I didn't mean to.
It was silent for a brief moment until Rainbow, who was hovering above broke the awkwardness.
"Jeez Twilight, Calm down. We are only wondering if you want to come out for a picnic. You need a break Twilight, we all feel that way because we haven't seen you in days. We all understand that you want to prove to the princess that you can do anything.. but that's not the case all the time. Please, come out and get fresh air and eat the best food in all of Equestria prepared by Applejack"
"Yeah! It's gonna be super duper fun!" Pinkie Pie added.
"She's right sugar, you have been working too hard. All we want for you is to take a break and relax and unwind" Applejack said giving me eye contact.
Rarity and Fluttershy nodded in agreement with the 3 of my friends.
I took it all in, but there was no more space to fit it all, and instead I gritted me teeth and snarled:
"CAN'T YOU ALL SEE THAT I'M BUSY?! I HAVE MORE IMPORTANT THINGS TO DO THEN GO ON A PICNIC"
All my friends gave me worried looks.
"Twilight, Are you alright?" Applejack asked putting a hoof on my shoulder, but quickly rubbed it off with my own.
"I'm just fine, Now leave!" I spoke towards my friends in being annoyed with them.
Rainbow could only give me a frowny glare while Pinkie and Fluttershy were hurt inside.
I went back inside and slammed the door with my hoof.
Quickly, I realized what I just did a moment ago. My ears purked down and I sighed.
"What did I do?" I whispered quietly to myself. "I turned down my friends, they were all worried about me and all I could do was yell at them for being a nuesance to me" Tears started to flow from the corners of my eyes. "I just don't know what went wrong"
I Walk upstairs to my bed and sobbed.. louder as each minute passed.
Spike recently came in the door with a bag of food due to me not eating for, who knows how long. "Twilight! I brought food for ya! I know your hungry but-" Spike stopped as he heard me crying out loud, he then walked up the stairs quickly and put down the bag on my bedstand and walked over to my side and hopped on.
"What's wrong Twilight?" Spike asked me in a caring tone.
*Sniff, Sniff* I look up from my pillow which was now wet due to my crying. I do the best I could to answer my apprentices question.
"I-" I began to speak "I- I- I just don't know what happend, first i'm studying then my friends knocked on my door to see if I wanted to go on a picnic with them and all I did was scream infront of them" Tears began to flow faster as I stopped talking.
"listen Twilight, Your the one pony that I care for the most, I understand where you are coming from. But I promise that if you ever need me, you can talk to me. I know where you went wrong Twily, You are so caught up in your studying, that you let it interfere with the life that you worked for"
I had no response and continued listening to spike.
"The thing is Twilight, is that you haven't slept in days but you fall asleep here and there, you barely eat, and believe me, I can hear your stomach from the top floor"
My response was my cheeks turning red.
"I'm sorry that you have to hear my stomach growl, it's just that these reports are more important to me than anything else"
Spike looked at me and shook his head, He looked at me with a concerned look and began to speak nothing but truth.
"Twilight, I have to disagree with that statement, I know that your studies are important to you, but they aren't the most important thing. Your friends are the most important thing in all of Equestria, including myself. You just have to make time. Studying is not the only thing you can do every day. Like I said Twilight, you have friends that care about you, and all they wanna do is to spend time with you and have fun"
I looked at him in the eyes. Tears were no longer flowing down my face.
"Listen Spike, I know what you mean. But the Princess has been overworking me way to much, I can't keep her from overworking me. She's pushing me too hard in my opinion"
"You have to tell her that Twilight, you can't expect it to stop" Spike replied.
"I know Spike, but I don't have the heart to tell her that, I'm afraid of the consenquences"
"Well, do what you want to do Twilight, I'm here for you if you need anything, I brought food for you, go, go eat!" Spike said with a smile.
"Thanks Spike, I really appreciate it" I replied while levitating the food onto my lap.
1.2 When will it stop?
[Twilight's Mind]
A Couple of weeks have past and yet, I'm still doing the same thing I have been, even with that talk I had with Spike just a couple of weeks ago.
I've been trying super hard to take his advice and try to be happy and not study all the time. I just feel like I can't do such a thing.
[Few days later]
Today could have been the worst day I have ever had in my entire life. But first, I'll go back just a few days ago.
My friends came knocking on my door again during my studies. I haven't had sleep in days, I haven't eaten a thing in 4 days and drank nothing but coffee to keep me awake. Anyway, when they knocked on my door for the 8th time this week, I snapped. My quill broke on the page as the knocking only got louder.
I furiously closed my book and stomped down the stairs. I opened the door with my magic and the door hit against the wall. There I stood breathing heavily with my eyes feeling like they were on fire. I gritted my teeth and snarled as I spoke:
"ALRIGHT, WHAT COULD IT POSSIBLY BE THIS TIME?! OH NO, DON'T ANSWER, LET ME GUESS.. ANOTHER THING TO KEEP ME FROM DOING WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO BE DOING RIGHT NOW?"
Rainbow Dash's face turned to a face of anger and yelled back at me.
"What is your problem Twilight?!" My pegasus friend began "All we came for as to check up on you!!, But apparently you just want to be the typical Twilight and yell for no apparent reason"
Applejack nodded "I agree with Rainbow. You can't just yell at somepony just for wanting to check up on you"
"Well excuse me! I have better things to do than open a door and listen to words that I don't need to hear!" I shouted.
"Well then, I guess we shouldn't even check up on you anymore.. It was all a mistake" Rainbow replied.
"FINE! LEAVE THEN!" I said yelling at Rainbow harshly.
"FINE THEN TWILIGHT!" Rainbow replied also yelling.
"Cmon guy's let's go" Applejack responded to the conversation.
"Wait!!" Pinkie Pie shouted. "I know your angry and everything, but i'm super duper worried about you!" Her ears perked down as she continued. "You haven't been acting like yourself, and when you do this kind of thing, you scare me Twilight"
My response to what my party friend had to say was
"I DON'T NEED ANYPONY TO WORRY ABOUT ME, I'M JUST FINE, STOP CHECKING UP ON ME FOR CELESTIA'S SAKE" I yelled towards them.
No response came, and they started to leave. I saw Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy's eyes filled with tears.
By the time they were far away enough from my home, I regretted on what I just did, I yelled out "Guys! I'm sorry!!" But they couldn't hear me.They were too far away to hear what I had to say.
I walked back inside with tears flowing down my face and I closed the door carefully. I walked away from the door and up the stairs to my bed and cried out loudly. Spike wasn't here to hear me cry in my own misery. I felt so pathetic. But all of it was my fault.
A few hours have past since the incident. The clock read 7:45 P.M.
Spike was returning from wherever he had to go. I didn't even know. Next thing I knew the door was opening and revealing Spike who was now finally home.
I was in the living room doing you know what.
"Twilight, i'm home!" Spike spoke happily.
"Oh, hey Spike" I replied softly.
"What's the matter?" Spike asked.
"It's nothing, Just had a rough day" I responded as I didn't take my eyes off the book infront of me.
"Okay well, I've had quite a day myself, I'm going to bed. Good night Twilight" Spike said walking up the stairs to his bed.
"Good Night Spike" I replied smiling at my apprentice.
1.3 Why isn't it over yet?
I woke up on the floor with drool across the wooden material. I quickly got up and put a hoof to my lip and in my head i'm thinking 'Eww, did I do that?'.
Anyhoof, I got up and took a long and relaxing shower after 2 weeks. I know it sounds disgusting that I haven't showered in 2 weeks, but I've been able to keep myself from smelling like a pig. After my shower, I went downstairs and made breakfeast. Having a Sunflower seed with flowers sandwhich sounded pretty appetizing, especially with sasperilla that Pinkie told me I should drink.
After my breakfeast I put the dishes in the sink and rinsed them off and walked my way towards the living room where all my books are.
As Spike was rising from his slumber, he burped and came out a scroll from the princess.
I opened it up and I examined the letter.
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Dear Twilight Sparkle.
I have been getting many complaints from your friends regarding your behavior. I'm very dissapointed in you.
Anyway, The test I prepared is finally complete and I'll be glad to give you it whenever you are ready.
I suggest you change your attitude Twilight. As I mentioned before, we can talk if somethings bothering you.
Princess Celestia.
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I was hurt on the inside by the Princesses words. My behavior has been out of control. I felt the tears coming back to me again.
Spike came down stairs and was wondering what was going on.
"What's wrong Twilight?"
I was crying too hard to even respond to Spike's question.
Spike walked over to me and read the letter himself. He had a short yet, depressing face.
He wrapped his arms around me to comfort me. I returned the embrace, crying on his shoulders.
Spike whispered into my ears, in a nice, comforting tone.
"Shhh... It's gonna be okay Twilight" My #1 assistant started as he began stroking my mane. "I know how upset and depressed you are, the Princess really wants to talk to you" Spike then told me to look at him in the eyes to where I was on the same page with him "You know how much she cares about you. Yes she's dissapointed in you for misbehaving alot, but it's because your in a lot of stress. Trust me, I've been under the same circumstances. It's difficult to handle, but with good friends and others like myself to be there to comfort and talk to you. We can work this out together and bring back the warm, beautiful smile on your face that I love the most, I just want you to be happy Twilight, That's all I ask. I am here for you no matter what!"
Hearing Spike say all that really touched me on the inside. Spike is truly the sweetest assistant you could ever ask for! All I could do was blush and put up a smile.
"Spike, you are truly the best assistant I could ever have, I never knew you were this sweet and kind. I really appreciate the talk Spike. It means alot to me to know how much you care for me"
Spike returned a smile and hugged me again.
"Of course Twilight, I've always cared about you. You hatched me from that egg when you were just a filly. I knew right then who I was gonna be spending my life with. To grow up and live happy with you. Your like a mother to me, you've always been there for me when I needed you. Now, I am returning the favor by doing everything I can to protect, love, and comfort you when you are sad and depressed, or even any worst case scenario"
My cheeks turned red.
"Awwww, I never knew you felt that way" I said returning the hug. "You know I will always love you no matter what!"
"I love you to Twilight" Spike replied softly.
For the rest of the night, we did something we haven't done in a long time, Family night.
What we do during Family Night is, Telling stories, new idea's for spells, anything that suits our personalities. I haven't felt this relaxed in a long time. I'm glad Spike did what he did, otherwise, i'd be completely lost and would be more miserable than I am now.
The clock read 1:50 A.M.
As me and Spike headed into our beds, I felt like I needed someone next to me to help me sleep. So, I asked Spike if he could sleep in my bed tonight cause it will help me sleep.
Spike responded with a nod and a smile.
"Of course I can Twilight, anything that will help you relax!"
I moved my underside pillow to the left side of the bed and unwrapped my blanket to where he can get in comfortably.
"Good night Spike" I whispered "I love you"
Spike looked at me and hugged me and responded with a yawn "I love you too Twilight, and Good night"
1.4 That's it, I'm done!
[Twilight's Mind]
I feel like I've had enough of this world. The stress is to much for me to handle. It's time to end this life, everypony will be better off without me!
I know they will be. Things I have done lately only caused nothing but trouble. My magic has been getting messed up due to a spell that was too powerful for me to handle and now, my magic is unpredictable.
[1 month later]
It's been a month since the incident with my friends and the short arguement we had. I haven't seen them since then.
I haven't left my house since that day, Spike does everything that I ask him to do such as, shopping, or to get food from a restraunt.
No other things but that. I haven't had a single interruption until today. Spike was coming downstairs to tell me that I needed to stop studying and get fresh air. I don't know what happened... I snapped at him. I took the paper I was writing on, tossed it into my book and threw it against the wall to convince him to know I am not in the mood to listen to such thing.
"SPIKE! IF YOUR GONNA KEEP ASKING ME THOSE SAME QUESTIONS, EVERY SINGLE FEATHERING DAY, JUST GET OUT PLEASE!"
Spike was immediately hurt by my words.
"But-!"
"I SAID GET OUT!!!!" I screamed stomping on my hooves.
Spike walked towards the door and screamed "FINE!" and slammed the door behind him.
He continued right after he closed it. "If that's how your going to treat me, just for caring about you, then I don't wanna be here! If your going to be a feather about everything.. Then I guess it's hopeless for you"
I never heard Spike talk like that before. He was really angry, I couldn't blame him because it was my fault for doing what I did. When you call somepony a feather, It means the B Word in the pegasi dictionary. It's crazy I know. But Spike is right. It is hopeless for me.
The realization sunk into my chest, I realized that I lost everything I held dear to. My stupidity and selfishness brought me into this situation that I can't get out of. The pain was too much for me to handle. Knowing that I lost all my friendships, with my friends, the Princess, and now... Spike. I couldn't gain the friendships back with either of them. It was all because of my stupidity and selfishness. I knew that if I were to die, then everypony will be better off without me, it'll be alot better when I'm gone! Off of this planet and into a place to where nopony has to ever remember that I did anything for Equestria.
Depression wasn't new for me. Everything that I have done was all my fault. My raging mind, my stubborness.. my act of cruelty towards my friends by verbal speech. I felt like I just needed to end it. I couldn't handle it anymore, everything that I worked so hard to gain, love and friendship, was now gone to never be able to obtain ever again.
I just wanted to make the pain stop. I went into the kitchen and grabbed buckets of chocolate ice cream and placed them next to me.
1 bucket... 2 buckets.... 3 buckets.. now my 4th, and my very last bucket. Even after gulping all that Ice cream down my throat and that my stomach was numb, the pain still remained.
I knew what I had to do. I teleported to my bedroom and went through my bedside table to find what I needed- A Switchblade.
But before I enhanced my decision. I wanted to make my final goodbyes to everyone I loved and cared about.
"Mother, Father, Shining, Cadence" I said to myself, with tears flowing down my cheekes "Please don't hate me for this"
Going through my photo album was the most difficult thing I have ever done in a long time.
As I came across a picture of me, spike, and 5 of my best friends. I whispered "I'm sorry, so, so sorry for everything I caused. The fighting, the loss of the friendships we all shared. It's all my fault, I've failed you all as a friend, I know you guys hate me now" I stared at it as my tears were falling onto the picture I held in my hooves. It was difficult to look at them, knowing that it would be the last time I'd ever see them.
When I saw a picture of me and the Princess, I examined it carefully. We were both smiling in this picture during the Galloping Gala. "Princess, I'm sorry that I failed you. I'm a horrible student. I know you hate me now too"
"Goodbye"
I set my photo album on my bed and teleported back to the center of my living room. In my mind I said to myself 'This is it'
I knew i'd never see my friends again, including my teacher, Princess Celestia. I picked up the knife with my magic, I stared at the blade as it shined by the light outside my window. 'This is it' I thought. 'This will end my life quickly'. The last words I spoke were "Goodbye, I'm sorry everypony"
But before I could bring the blade to my neck. I heard my voice being shouted out from outside my door. 'It's them'
"Twilight! Twilight!"
Spike came in busting through the door, with my 5 friends behind them. Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Rarity and Applejack.'
Spike screamed in horror as he saw the blade above my head, in his frantic shock he managed to speak.
"Twilight?! What are you doing!"
I turned around, Tears flowing down my face and I replied back to him.
"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm killing myself!"
AppleJack, who was in shock by the sight of my knife. Spoke to me in worry.
"Sugar, Why in Equestria would you kill yourself?"
"Why am I killing myself?" I started "I have nothing else to live for!"
"Twi, You know that's not true! You have many good friends including Spike that all care about you! Do you have any idea how hard it would be for us if we lost ya?"
I started to realize what I was doing. Leaving my friends like this would be the most selfish thing I'd ever do.
"But, I caused alot of hurt in all of you!" Tears were now flowing down my cheeks like a waterfall as I dropped the blade. "I thought all of you hated me now for what I've done"
Rainbow began to speak as she landed on her hooves and walked towards me. "Why would you ever think that Twilight? None of us hate you. Spike here came by sugarcube corner and explained what's been happening to you. We all care about you, that's why we came here. All of us want to help you Twilight. When we saw the blade above your head. To be honest, I got really scared. We don't want you to die, we all love you with our hearts" Rainbow threw her hooves around me and began to cry on my shoulders. I returned the hug and cried on her shoulders too. I managed to reply back to my pegasi friend in sorrow.
"I- I'm so sorry! I never thought of it that way. You guys really do care for me, no matter all the fights and arguements we had"
I looked up from my friends shoulder, looking at all of my friends crying, including Spike.
Pinkie Pie walked up to me and wrapped her hooves around my back. I held her for dear life as I knew how hurt she was. Extreme guilt came over me by the thought I knew of that I'd be leaving one of my friends that I was closest to. My party friend started to speak
"Twilight, It hurts me on the inside knowing that one of my bestest friends would kill herself and leave us!" I replied back to her, with tears still flowing down my cheeks. "I'm so sorry Pinkie, I didn't think of the consenquences. I never meant to hurt you in anyway, Can you forgive me?" All of my friends overheard me talking to Pinkie.
"Of course I can you silly filly!" A Smile came onto her beautiful pink face along with her shining blue eyes. "I love you too much to let anypony like you go"
I looked up from the eyes of my party friend to see my friends nodding in agreement. They all loved me too. They walked over to me and we all got into a group hug and cried together. They made me realize that I have so much to live for and that I never lost friendships with any of my 5 bestest friends! Spike as well.
Suddenly, a blinding bright light occured inside the room. The light revealed a ivory alicorn with a multi-color flowing mane and tail. It was Princess Celestia!
"My dear Twilight" the Princess began. But before she could continue. I ran over to her and hugged her tightly.
"I'm so sorry princess! I feel horrible, knowing that I was going to kill myself and leave my friends, which I thought I lost my friendships with"
"Twilight, You never lost your friendships with any of your friends, I feel a stronger bond now between all of you" The Princess set me down back on my hooves and gave me her attention towards me. "I didn't realize the stress and agony you were going through, it was a good thing that I came before it was to late. I did however, overheard everything that you have said. That's why I sent you responses telling you that if you needed to talk to me, I can come and talk to you, I'm so sorry that it even got this bad" The Princess had tears flowing from her big beautiful eyes.
I hugged the Princess, with a smile on my face I was happy to respond to her.
"It's not your fault Princess, It's all mine. I'm very grateful knowing that my friends cared enough to come and convince me that I have so much more to live for, even you Princess, I'm glad that we can move on from this mess, and again, I'm so sorry"
My friends came over and they all told me, one by one, that it was okay and that everything is now turning for the better.
Fluttershy and Rarity spoke out
"We just want you to know that we love you, and that we don't ever want to lose you. It would break our hearts to know that your gone and not coming back"
I put on the biggest smile that I have put on in a very long time.
"I love you too guys!" I walked over to them and gave them the biggest hug that could of ever been done.
For the rest of the day, we spent the day relaxing, playing games, and hanging out like best friends should!
When sunset came, I looked at the dipping sun. A Thought ran through my mind
'If it weren't for my friends to get me out of that situation, I would be dead and every single one of them would be hurt. But I now know that isn't the case and i'm grateful towards every one of them. All of them are my friends and that I'm glad that they are. Without them, I don't know where I'd be. But after today's events, I know that everything will now turn for the better. My life isn't complete. It's still to be filled with wonders and that I will continue to Sparkle across the land. Everything will be okay'
The End.
