Cold Cupcakes

by Grunt Minor

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, Comedy
Length: 1498

Pinkie has invented a new recipe for Dash to try.

Pinkie has invented a new recipe for Dash to try.

Cover image by ShortCurcuit

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-04-29 18:40:02 UTC

Cold Cupcakes

Rainbow Dash was sitting at a table in Sugarcube Corner alone, enjoying a snack after her shift as a weather pony. A glass of milk complemented her half-eaten Danish that was on the table in front of her. She did this normally after work, just to wind down before heading home. It was getting pretty late in the evening and most if not all of the customers had left already. Rainbow being the last to leave wasn't unusual, actually it happened almost every work day.

Right now, her snout was pressed into the newspaper. Not literally of course.

She usually didn't read it, mostly just browsed the articles for any new developments on the Wonderbolts or just skimmed the comics real quick. Her eyes scanned across the text, looking for something worthwhile to read. Without looking, she picked up her glass of milk and took a sip before setting back down and turning the page.

Pinkie Pie appeared from the kitchen and passed the cash register with a tray of cupcakes balanced on her head. She wore a bright and cheery smile as she gazed at Rainbow Dash. She approached Rainbow Dash from behind and called out to her. The ecstatic pink pony made something special, just for her Dashie. It was a new experimental thing that she wanted to try and really hoped that her friend would like it.

"Evening Dashie!" she squeaked happily.

Rainbow Dash turned around to face her friend, letting the newspaper crinkle and droop in her grasp.

"What's up Pinkie?" she replied.

Pinkie dipped her head, letting the tray of cupcakes fall into a waiting pink hoof.

"I baked a batch of frozen cupcakes!" she announced.

Rainbow Dash rose an eyebrow and shook her head in disdain.

"You don't bake a batch of frozen cupcakes."

"Well, I did," Pinkie said, shrugging her shoulders.

"Are they cold?" Rainbow asked rhetorically.

"Maybe, maybe not..." Pinkie glared at her intently, squinting her eyes as threateningly as she could.

Rainbow Dash sighed.

"They're cold, aren't they?" she deadpanned.

Pinkie rolled her eyes and giggled.

"Yup!"

The blue pegasus groaned.

"Cold cupcakes?" she asked, giving Pinkie a 'you can't be serious' glare.

Pinkie frowned a little bit.

"I could put them back in the oven if you want," Pinkie Pie offered, that wide, happy grin still plastered on her face.

Rainbow Dash looked turned away and readjusted the newspaper in her hooves as she read on. She thought that, maybe if she ignored Pinkie, she would go away and leave her alone. But after a few seconds, the party pony was still there, frozen in place and not willing to leave until she got what she wanted. It was creepy, with Pinkie staring at her back like that, she couldn't focus on the articles in front of her.

She conceded defeat.

"No thanks Pinkie. I'm not hungry," she rose her voice without turning around, taking a bite of her Danish.

"But Dashie!" Pinkie whined like a foal.

"I'm not gonna eat them!" Rainbow Dash yelled a little more forcefully this time.

"I baked these for you," Pinkie whispered almost as quietly as Fluttershy, a hurt expression on her face.

Rainbow Dash turned around once again to face her.

"No!"

"Eat them!" Pinkie was beginning to yell as well.

"No!"

"I want you to eat these!" Pinkie cried.

"I'm not eating them!" Rainbow Dash demanded, becoming annoyed.

"Eat these right now or I'll dump them on the floor and I'll blame it on you!" Pinkie squeaked angrily, holding the tray of frozen cupcakes a little higher.

Rainbow rolled her eyes.

"Oh yeah, real mature."

After that, Pinkie was silent for a second. Then, her blank expression gave way to a dark scowl.

"I BAKED THESE FOR YOU!" Pinkie screamed at the top of her lungs.

The pegasus shook her head at Pinkie.

"Now, why don't you grow up?" Rainbow taunted, an air of superiority in her voice.

Pinkie was still angry, her ears drooping.

"I did it, BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!"

"Well, I'm not gonna eat them!" Rainbow pouted, folding her hooves over her chest, glaring at Pinkie.

"I HATE YOU!"

Rainbow groaned and facehoofed.

"That's all I ever hear anymore! 'Dashie! try this!' or 'Dashie! try that!' Remember that...what was it?" Rainbow Dash turned away and let the newspaper fall to the ground as she tapped a hoof onto the table, trying to remember.

"Ramen and uh...what was it?" she asked Pinkie.

"Sprinkles," Pinkie finished.

"It was a good idea," she added.

Rainbow Dash pounded a fore leg onto the table.

"You didn't make a single bit."

"I made a bit of ramen noodles with sprinkles," Pinkie fired back, a passionate stare in her eyes.

Rainbow Dash was not amused.

"And don't forget that whole 'Baked Bads' incident, right?" Rainbow pointed out.

"What was that? Fifty ponies hospitalized? ...Yeah, fifty ponies. Hospitalized."

Rainbow Dash nodded to that for emphasis.

"YOU EAT THESE! RIGHT! NOW!" Pinkie screamed again.

Rainbow Dash had to cup her hooves over her ears for a second, all of Pinkie's screaming was not only getting on her nerves but was also painful as well. She was surprised that Mr. or Mrs. Cake hadn't come down to silence the both of them for being so loud.

"Eat your own cold cupcakes!" she shot back.

Pinkie squealed in protest and looked down onto the tray in front of her.

"There's so many of them! What am I gonna do with all these cold cupcakes?!" she protested.

"Eat them!" Rainbow ordered.

"NO!" Pinkie shouted.

"Yes!"

"NO!" Pinkie screamed as her pupils bounced around her eyes uncontrollably.

Pinkie then sprung to the table, sliding into a seat next to Rainbow and knocking over her milk in the process.

"Dashie...please," she whispered again, staring at Rainbow with a hopeful frown.

Rainbow Dash couldn't stand those puppy-dog eyes that Pinkie always gave her.

"What?" Rainbow whispered back, the situation seeming to calm down.

Pinkie slid the tray adorably over to Rainbow Dash with her snout, pushing the Danish aside.

"Eat. My. Cold. Cupcakes."

Rainbow Dash looked down onto the tray of multi-colored cupcakes in front of her, deep in thought.

After a few seconds of thinking about the consequences of what she was about to do, she gave in.

"Okay," she stated simply.

Pinkie Pie looked at her with her mouth agape in shock.

"Okay?" she questioned, not believing what Dash had just said.

Rainbow nodded to help confirm.

"Okay," she repeated, much quieter this time.

Rainbow lifted a cupcake out of the tray and held it up for Pinkie to see.

Pinkie just stared in anticipation.

"Here it comes...I hope she likes it!" Pinkie thought.

Rainbow Dash's mind was much different.

"Oh dear Celestia! Please don't let this be like that 'Cupcakes' movie! Please don't kill me! I don't wanna die! I don't wanna die! I don't wanna die!" she chanted in her head as the green-frosted cupcake in her hoof headed towards her mouth.

One of Pinkie's pupils started to slip off randomly but the pink mare caught this and locked it back into place.

Rainbow Dash bit into the treat.

It was definitely frozen, no doubt. The chill almost hurt her teeth as she began to chew. The taste was no different, it was just like any other cupcake. It was a little more solid and harder to munch on but the refreshment that came from the cold was a nice touch.

Rainbow swallowed the bite and set the rest of the cupcake down.

She hiccuped once.

Both ponies were frozen in place, both in anticipation. One waiting on a review, the other waiting to either die or pass out from a date-rape drug.

After a few seconds, Rainbow broke the silence.

"It's pretty good," she concluded.

Pinkie looked from the cupcake to her in surprise.

"Yeah, I like that," Dash added.

****

"And that's how Equestria was made!" Pinkie exclaimed.

Princess Luna frowned at her with confusion.

"That is impossible. I was here when Equestria became a country, dear Pinkie Pie."

"So was I!" Pinkie sang in reply.

Luna jumped a bit at that as her pupils dilated.

Pinkie giggled as she galloped back towards the party in the castle.

"And maybe next time, I'll tell you how I became a multi-billion-bit business tycoon by selling cold cupcakes and how Dashie liked them so much that she married me! It's a gem!"

"I wonder if Dashie's an addict now..." Pinkie pondered absentmindedly.

Now that she thought about it, many ponies were getting arrested for the things they did while under the influence of cold cupcakes...

It was probably nothing though, she was worrying her little Pinkie head over nothing.

Luna stared blankly at the pink pony as she disappeared back into the crowd, ponies dancing and the music bumping.

"I'm hungry now," Luna whimpered like a puppy, laying down on the carpet with her hooves holding up her chin.

She wanted a cold cupcake.