And the mares and the stallions shall be two halves of the great divine, and in their union new life shall spring. And to ensure that the holy creation would not be desecrated by the follies of sin, the powers that be gave mares the gift of each other, and gave stallions unto each other for their own pleasures, so that the life-giving union shall remain pure.

Spike has made up his mind. He's going to confess his love to Rarity. There's just one problem: nearly everyone else in Ponyville is gay. When Spike comes out as straight, it creates ripples throughout Ponyville he is not equipped to deal with.