Lessons in Innocence and Cognizance

by LordBarcha

Rating: everyone
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Sad, Princess Luna, Princess Cadance, Princess Celestia
Length: 3424

After Shining Armor falls in battle, Luna helps Cadence cope with her grief. With his death, Cadence can no longer escape the harsh reality of her immortality and must come to terms with it.

After Shining Armor falls in battle, Luna helps Cadence cope with her grief. With his death, Cadence can no longer escape the harsh reality of her immortality and must come to terms with it.

Twilight, also struck by the truth of her situation, seeks out Celestia, who offers her an answer as harsh as the truth she must face.

Despite the sad tag, I can promise that there are heartwarming moments.

Published 2013-04-30 20:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-05-03 18:00:11 UTC

A Lesson in Innocence

The smoke was the first indication that something was amiss. It poured over the mountains like some monstrous flood. In its wake, tongues of flame bit at the branches of Everfree. As the day wore on, they curled up through the branches of Everfree, heralding the fall of trees older than Equestria. Advancing inexorably toward Ponyville, only a group of royal guards stood in their way. As groups fought fires with buckets, others struggled to clear away underbrush to deprive the fire its fuel.

“Keep the bucket lines going!” Shining Armor cried, exhorting the soldiers to greater effort. His face, scarred and grizzled from long years of service was clenched in a grimace from the heat.

A roar cut through the crackling flames. Shining red scales tore through burning trees, scattering them like so much chaff. As the world ignited, Shining Armor still stood firm. Letting loose a cry that cowed even the dragon, he charged. Then, the fires engulfed him, obscuring him from sight.

A half hour later, the dragon fell. Later inspection would reveal Shining Armor’s spear lodged in its heart. His armor, badly scorched, and more importantly, empty, was recovered soon after.

Luna strode down the hall, humming a gentle lullaby under her breath. Candles flickered and went out as she passed, apparently extinguished by her mere presence. Stopping at a window, she stared out at the fading smoke. Under the tranquil silence of the night, it was almost possible to forget the tragedy of the morning. Silence and sleep would wash away their cares for now. A gentle smile played across her face. All was as it should be.

A splintering crash snapped her from her reverie. Alarmed, she galloped toward the source of the sound. Sounds of shattering glass, cracking wood, and smashed porcelain echoed down the hallways toward her. Turning a corner, she found a pair of alarmed guards. They bowed as she approached.

“Report,” she demanded curtly. Whatever it was, it had happened on her watch. Unforgivable.

“We were guarding the door, just as we always do,” the guard informed her, “Princess Celestia went in with Princess Cadence roughly twenty minutes ago. Celestia emerged ten minutes later and ordered us not to enter the room under any circumstances. The sounds began very recently.”

“I’m going in,” Luna announced, “Maintain a guarding stance and allow no one else entrance”

“With all due respect, we have no idea what is in that room!” the guard cautioned.

Pulling the door open, Luna chastised him, “You have your orders. Now follow them.”

With a dull thud, the door closed behind her. The room was dark, even to the night princess’ eyes. That shouldn’t be possible. Uneasiness dug its claws into her stomach.

“Are you there, Cadence?” she called gently, stepping forward.

“Leave me!” Cadence’s shriek barely sounded coherent. It carried a hint of familiar magic. The memory sent a shudder down her spine.

“What happened?” Luna asked cautiously, stepping further into the room. Deep, gasping sobs were her only answer. “He died, didn’t he?”, she asked. The weeping grew more intense, answering her question. Spiking wildly, the all too familiar magic coursed over her in waves.

A hint of fear tinged her voice, causing it to quiver slightly. Thankfully, she kept the stammer under control, “We need to talk. I’m sure no one wants another Nightmare, and I’m equally sure you don’t want to be that Nightmare.”

“Says Nightmare Moon.”

Luna’s hoof struck a puddle of something, causing her to slip. Frustrated at her blindness, she finally lit her horn. The puddle, which was slowly oozing outward, had stained her coat bright red. From atop the ruined bed, Cadence stared down at her, mane rippling wildly. Chunks of armor extended from her head, incomplete, but growing. In shock, Luna slipped again, extinguishing the light. This time, the stammering became uncontrollable,

“C-cadence. You cannot b-begin to understand how sorry I am. Please. You have to listen to m-me.”

“What do you want from me?” her voice slowly modulated down an octave. As rich as chocolate, but cold as ice. It sounded obscene, compared to the innocent, childish quality it once possessed.

Forcing back the fear, and the dark magic carried by the sound, she answered slowly, “ I want to help you.”

“Can you bring him back?” The question was acrid and bitter.

Though tempted to lie, she answered honestly, “no.”

“Can you kill me?”

“No.”

“Then what good are you?” Cadence snarled.

Suddenly, something clicked for Luna. She gently changed the subject, “It’s interesting. Do you know that after a few hundred years, an immortal gains the ability to view a soul?”

“No.” The bitterness had left Cadence’s voice slightly, replaced by curiosity.

Taking a deep breath, she spilled a secret a thousand years old, “When we look into the hearts of others, we occasionally find something unusual. The potential for immortality is something that you are born with. We merely wake up the skill. A few, like Celestia, discovered the trick on their own, but they are the minority.”

Cadence’s voice lightened again, “You say that like you’re not the first.”

“Evening Star, Iris Flare, and a dozen others came before us. They are vaguely remembered by other names in scraps of mythology. Empyrean is remembered as Nightmare Fury, The Pyre of Tartarus, and Hephaestus, to name only a few of his titles.” Luna continued.

“What happened to them?

Sighing, Luna finally reached the point, “They succumbed to the pain. Each had their own delusions, but the result was the same. Nightmare Fury turned a kingdom to glass. Nightmare Detritus rendered a once fertile plain so uninhabitable that anything alive within its borders turns to ash. The history books lie. Eternal night was not Nightmare Moon’s goal out of mere jealousy. It was an act with genocide as its intent.”

Cadence’s sharp gasp marked another spike of magic. Her voice grew harder, and somehow colder as she demanded, “Why would they do that? Why would you do that?”

Luna shuddered. She was gambling everything on this. If it failed, she would give a new Nightmare all of the justification it would ever need. “Because we came to view life as a curse. Each of us in turn began our own war to end it. Despair, desperation, and righteous fury were our reasons. I still shudder when I think of how wrong we were.”

“What other answer is there?” Cadence’s voice had lost the pulse of magic. Instead, her former, innocent tone had returned. The desperation that laced it was heartwrenching.

Luna suddenly felt every one of her years like a thousand pounds of lead, and an epiphany struck. Suddenly, the situation seemed to lose any scrap of severity. Unable to help herself any longer, she laughed. After a few seconds, she changed the subject again, “It’s amusing in a terrible way. All of the ones who could best use immortality are the ones who lack the potential to receive it.”

“Why do you say that?”

Pushing aside the maelstrom of anxiety and hilarity, she launched into the unknown, “Shining Armor was born a mortal, lived as a mortal, and was always fated to die as one. A single glance from these eyes confirmed that. However, he owned his life for only a short time. He himself chose to give up his life to the service of others for as long as he could still breathe. Even his death was an act of service, given to protect.”

“Why are you doing this?” Cadence asked, her voice cracking.

“To show you that there is a purpose. Living in a transient world is a burden, but we were given this burden for a reason. If you want to give up your life, give it up. However, give it to the ones who can’t help themselves. Serve them in ways that only you can. So do what your late husband did. Become what he was unable to become. Keep his legacy alive, because you are the only one who can.”

Instantly, the overpowering aura vanished. Something soft and wet struck her, clinging to her tightly. “Hold me,” it begged.

Drawing a trembling and sobbing Cadence into a gentle embrace, Luna whispered, “There, there. I will always be here. You can count on it.”

Author's Note

Comments are appreciated. If there is any interest, I might actually make it a two-part piece. (Celestia and Twilight)

A Lesson in Cognizance

(Note: This chapter is very different in terms of tone and lesson. The promise in the description does not apply to this chapter.)

Celestia sat quietly behind her desk, waiting patiently. Shining Armor was dead. It was only a matter of time until the chain came full circle. In the distance, she felt a pulse of magic, and idly wondered how Luna was handling the problem. A few moments later, her patience was rewarded with a knock on her door.

“Come in,” she called, watching the door swing open. A dejected, tearstained Twilight slowly stepped into the room.

“He’s gone” Twilight sobbed.

“I know,” she answered simply. Slowly standing, she embraced Twilight.

“How do you do it?” Twilight asked.

“Do what?” She replied, feigning ignorance.

“How do you deal with this sadness?”

“Let me tell you a story,” Celestia answered gently, “It’s about a pair of young sisters. Your answer lies at its end. However, the second you interrupt is the moment I stop telling the story. So listen, Twilight, and listen well.”

Releasing Twilight, Celestia began to recount her life story,

“Many hundreds of years ago, two sisters lived in the small village of Canterlot. In those days, Canterlot was a small mining town on the outskirts of Equestria and the capital was actually where Everfree is now. We two sisters were already as different as night and day. My every waking hour was spent deep in study, completely isolated from others. I only emerged from the library once or twice a week, just long enough to secure necessities. On the other hand, my sister spent her days adventuring in the caves with her surveying party. They were the closest of friends. Inseparable. I suppose that when I first saw you, I wanted to see a bit of my sister in you, which is why I sent you to ponyville. It would have made things far less interesting if you had merely become me.

And so we lived in the same house, catching glimpses of each other’s lives. Personally, I never felt any desire to share my sister’s fate. I’m sure she felt the same. We lived that way for many years. While she wooed and eventually married Topaz Shine, I mastered advanced spell forms. When she found the richest deposit of magic crystals in two centuries, I devised several dozen new spells that baffled even the magic professors fifty years my senior.

Then, the game abruptly changed. Princess Emerald Growth arrived in our little town. I sought her for a time, seeking to show her the results of my studies. I saw her once during her trip. She took one look at me, turned and practically ran the other way. Somehow I had done something to scare her, or perhaps, to offend her”

Celestia paused for a moment at Twilight’s barely stifled gasp, before continuing,

“The next day, my sister was gone, now an immortal alicorn princess. It wounded me more deeply than you can imagine. My sister, had been chosen over me. While my sister sought to master her new power, I redoubled my studies, seeking the spell that had been cast on my sister. I poured over every book in the library, just looking for a single lead.

After years of searching, I finally found what I had sought. Forcing my way past Cerberus, I delved into the very heart of Tartarus in search of Nightmare Fury. The mere sight of him still haunts me. He was a pillar of absolute heat, shining like the sun. My strongest ice magics were swept away like sand in a gale. It was all I could do to keep myself from igniting. Any lesser being would have been less than ash in seconds. The mere idea that something of his strength and raw unadulterated power could be chained terrified me. And where the princess had shunned me, the fallen destroyer addressed me, offering what I had sought in exchange for a single task. I was to carry a message to the Princess from the Nightmare.”

Stifling a chuckle, she noticed the increasingly horrified look on Twilight’s face,

“You cannot begin to imagine how good it felt. I basked in his flames for hours, feeling them burn me, but knowing that they could no longer destroy me. And so, I walked to the capital city. I’m sure that my scorched coat looked anything but majestic. However, it was my moment of victory. I had sought immortality and won. Nothing could possibly detract from it. The princess received me, if reluctantly, and I delivered the scroll. I still don’t know what was on it. I merely know the look on the princess’ face, the very picture of raw horror and despair. Whatever was on that scroll wounded her deeply. Three months later, Nightmare Plantae created the Everfree Forest, generating an environment uninhabitable to intelligent life. She was locked away under the palace she once ruled from, where she remains to this day.

And so, the years passed. Every day, I learned just a bit more about governing Equestria, while my sister chose to fade into the background more and more. According to her, the sight of mortals was wounding her deeply, and she could no longer bear to face them. Her condition only worsened with the following years. I thought she would simply overcome it with time. After all, I had no problems doing so. Only when she began to transform into Nightmare Moon did I realize the severity. She was my sister. I had to do something. Little Luna was never too great with magic. She never stood a chance. I forced her to revert, ripping out every memory in her head in the process. It was the most terrible mistake of my life. Although she was free, she was nothing more than a shell, devoid of her former passion. Like the new moon, she was barely noticeable. I think I preferred her that way. As accepting as she was, It was easier to ignore her. She was the very symbol of my crime, a thing I could no longer face.”

Noticing the freely flowing tears, Celestia cut off the suspicions immediately,

“I wouldn’t be too worried, Twilight, you did not share in my crimes. However you managed to revert Nightmare Moon, it was not by my technique. Regardless, fate wasted no time punishing me. As though sensing my weakness, disaster struck a few years later. The Discord you faced was weak and unfocused, a mere shadow of his former self. From the time he appeared, to the time he had all of Equestria under his control was something like five seconds. He was very romantic in his approach. I seem to remember it involving a literal mountain of cake. Admittedly, it was dumped on my head, but it’s the thought that counts. Long story short, I gained his trust, married him, and hit him with pure harmony magic at the first available opportunity. His face was priceless. Unfortunately, he cast one of his spells before being entirely reduced to stone. It would be another hundred years before I fully realized the implications.

Discord’s vengeance happened so subtly. It was completely unlike him. I had grown accustomed to my sister’s impassive, unresponsive life. When I first heard that she was walking again, hope filled me. But when I next saw her, she strode past me without so much as a glance. For the next century, she walked the halls in silence, eyes unfocused. Occasionally, a maid would find her with her head braced against one of the newer walls, trying to keep walking. Eventually, I concluded that fate had merely decided to remind me again of my crime, to make it an inescapable thing. Then, one night, I woke with a stabbing pain in my forehead, and my horn lying in a corner of the room. Above me, Nightmare Moon stood in all her glory. Discord had returned some fragment of her memories, but he had returned all of the wrong ones. She was a monster of my own creation. All of her former pain, combined with centuries of my neglect had reforged her in a new and dangerous way. Her patience had been unending, carefully seeding her vengeance completely unnoticed. Every last guard, precaution, or piece of protective magic was gone. I was utterly helpless. Her every second since Discord’s fall had been devoted to this moment. She was the embodiment of every last crime I ever committed, and my punishment had come to me. And then something happened. I don’t remember what. All that I knew was that she was gone, and would be back someday Others tell me that they saw me strike Luna with some kind of magic, which I attributed to the Elements of Harmony.”

Twilight’s eyes had become glassy and unfocused, devoid of their former life. Ignoring it, Celestia finished her tale,

“And thus, my solitude began. You are still too young to relate, but time is something that changes as you grow older. In my youth, a year felt so long. Now, it seems that weeks pass every time I so much as blink. If I had no interest in interacting with the mortals before my ascension, I had even less now. Why should I care about what happened to them? They would be gone before I could even realize that they were there. They can do nothing for me but provide amusement. Let me tell you, Twilight, every century, there are dozens, if not hundreds of ponies with the potential to become immortal. I chose you out of all of the last millennium's worth for a reason. I chose you because you remind me of myself. As immortals, we play a game with the world, and I have searched for centuries to find a worthy opponent.”

As Celestia recounted her tale, Twilight felt something odd. A growing numbness flowed over her, washing away her sadness. Slowly, she became aware of the tears flowing from her eyes.

Was I crying? Why would I cry?

For a moment, she tried to recall, but then decided it didn’t matter.

What is sadness, anyway?, she wondered absently.

Suddenly, she got the joke, and the world was suddenly hilarious. Her laughter stopped abruptly as she forgot what humor was.

Have I been laughing?, She asked herself idly.

She couldn’t remember. Detachedly, she became aware of Celestia’s spear protruding from her chest, but she felt nothing. Where had the pain gone? Then she finally lost what little feeling she had left, her thoughts decaying into a loop.

Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who- I? W-

As Twilight faded entirely, she heard someone answer. “My name is Nightmare Harmonia.”

“I thought you were stronger than this, Twilight,” Celestia sighed, slowly standing. Then she chuckled, a feral grin stretching across her face, “Well, this isn’t any fun when it’s too predictable. Let the games begin, Harmonia”

Author's Note

I'd like to start by saying that Celestia is (and always has been) one of my favorite characters. She ranks right under Derpy (is best pony) in my top five list.

That said, I showed that rare case where it went right. I had already explained exactly how it usually went wrong, so I resolved to show the most dangerous outcome possible. Celestia is an immortal just cracked enough to avoid going mad.

As a character, I tried to reforge her into something interesting. My first goal was to make her deeply flawed. Everything that has gone wrong is at least partially her fault. However, the path was indisputable her own to follow. Coercion never once touched her path. In the end, the goal was to create a being that can be equally pitied and feared. Please feel free to tell me how I failed it and why (or the inverse).

If people don't hate me now, I am considering a third part. However, at this point, I am mostly out of ideas.