Inconsequentiality

by Derpator

Rating: mature
Tags: Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Sad, Main 6, Romance, Spike, Rainbow Dash, Sex, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 8252

Twilight Sparkle is now a princess, and with it comes all the perks and consequences. But no matter how "royal" you are, estrous comes back to haunt you, princess or no.

Twilight Sparkle is now a princess, and with it comes all the perks and consequences it entails. But no matter how "royal" you are, the oestrous cycle comes back to haunt you, princess or not. Will Twilight manage to not start bucking everypony she sees?

To everyone: This story originally belonged to Vengeful Spirit. He openly offered this story out, and I have taken it over. It shall be going through edits and changes, until hopefully, it can be completed and put out for everyone's enjoyment. As it stands now, it still contains the original chapters Vengeful published, so it is unedited.

Published 2013-07-03 15:00:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-07-09 15:32:34 UTC

Prologue

There are few things in the world like the loss of a friend. At first, it comes as a mere shock, something that passes by like the trickling of the hours as you wait for them to come back. It's as if everyone was simply spouting bullshit, and that they weren't really gone, that they were merely away for a while. As time passes, you find that when they'd normally be there, waiting, they aren't. You can wake up one morning to find yourself heading to where they live without thought, working off of nothing but that strange ritual you had built up over time.

But they aren't there. The days pass by, night after night, and it doesn't change. They weren't there, they aren't there, and they aren't going to be. One day, you will find yourself turning around at an idea to tell them, only to find that they aren't there, and then it will finally dawn on you. They aren't coming back. They never will come back, no matter how hard you wish it.

And that's exactly what you do after that. Life drags onward, the sun still rising slowly every dreary morning afterwards. You wish for them to come back, to ease that pain in the empty hole that was once your heart. You ask life, "Why?", as if it would somehow care for the play of events that transpired. Nothing will come of it, though. They will remain as dead as they were yesterday, and the day before. Life will care about your situation just about as much as monkey will give a rats ass about where it takes a shit, or what it does with it after the feces have been dropped.

Some of the worst losses will bring about truer depression and sorrow than you've ever known. While the world around you moves on, you sit morosely in that limbo that you yourself created. The prison you created can be more difficult to leave than Alcatraz or Skid Row. At least these were corporeal places that could be broken from, an existential issue from the outside, that can be seen, understood, and fought. But this isn't some real-world battle that can be fought in the plain of reality. It's all merely a matter of the mind, a trap of its own mechanizations, defeated only by the mind that created it.

The color seems to drain out of life, as if the days were now a lack-luster shade of gray where there had once been such beauty. All the new beauty we find, the art of existence itself ceases to impress us. What is it really, but different variances of the same ideas that had been held throughout eternity, drawn into the world that will soon be forgotten by the people who will eventually inhabit it.

Most people move on after a while, accepting the fact that their wants, their dreams, where but little murmurings of a young foal, left with nothing to call its own except that sorrow that they hold to themselves like a precious teddy bear. They move on, last in the line of those that do, and carry on with their daily lives, and they regain some of the color from people that they add to their heart later. They fill much of the gap that had rested there for so long, leaving but a mere scar, and the dearest memories that accompany it.

Eventually we too will die, and pass on. There will be others around us who feel the pain that we once felt, and they too will start down that winding path of life that all must sooner or later follow. As time drags forever on, those you held dear to your heart will find themselves forgotten. Time is life's greatest tyrant, and can crush mountains more easily than any past lord or king could ever dream of. We will be erased from history, sooner or later, by nothing but history itself. Even if we were to achieve true fame and glory, enough time will pass that, even if it took thousands of years, memory will pass us by. Finite beings are incapable of such things as true recollection of their own history.

None of that will really matter to us in the end, though. Whether there is a heaven out there somewhere or not, it doesn't make a difference. If there were, we would soon find ourselves reunited with what mattered most to us in our live; each other. There would be much celebration, and the joy that comes with the reunification of people who had waiting a very long time for the next time they should meet. And if there is none, there will be nothing to recall them with. Either case will bring about the peace we spent the rest of our lives desperately looking for.

Such solace was not something that Princess Twilight Acorna Sparkle would ever be granted the priviledge of. While all her friends passed slowly away, hoping to find each other again and reunite those bonds that had bound each other together, she would remain behind. Whether or not there's an afterlife had little relevance. While they would eventually fade into the folds of time, and either be or cease to be, she had to remain behind, but a pebble stuck forever on the bend of a flowing stream, left to the devices of time like some relic left behind. She was nothing but a trapped soul, left behind by those that she saw her genesis with.

While no finite being who is subject to the infinite realm of immortality had anywhere near the capacity to remember everypony in their limited, simple minds, there's no way to truly forget those you had grown up around. They sit there, held tightly and locked without key or escape from your heart. She would never forget her friends.

Applejack had been the first, ironically enough. They had all assumed that she would be long in passing, since the responsible mare was not the sort to run too many risks. Her heart had given out on her at the meager age of fifty-six, worn thin by the hard labor that she had stubbornly clung to her entire life. It had devastated the rest of them, but they still had each other's shoulders to cry on.

It was nearly a decade before Pinkie Pie had joined her, leaving the world with a bang. If she had but one way to chose to die, the way she went would certainly be it, passing on still pleasing the ponies around her with one of the biggest parties she had given in her life. There were far worse ways to go.

The next to go was Rarity, at the bustling age of sixty-nine (shut up, you pervs). After so many years running around making dresses at a frantic rate, she finally retired, and slowly passed on quietly in the middle of the night. Her sister was shocked that she would die so soon.

Fluttershy left in a similar way to Rarity only two years later. The animals seemed shellshocked at the time, but they seemed to move on after a while. She had remained the only one to never seek out a mate or spouse, and so there were no children to miss her. That didn't stop it from hurting both Twilight and the last remaining Element.

Twilight spent the next decade trying not to think about what would happen when Rainbow Dash finally died. The others all expected her to be the first to die, given her reckless nature. But the mare was too kind a mare and a wife to abandon those that cared for her early like that. She was, after all, the Element of Loyalty.

When the cyan mare had finally died, Twilight was truly heartbroken. She had been one of the bearers of the casket for each of her closest friends, and there had always been a shoulder to cry on. But now, after so many years hoping that day would never come, the last of her friends had left her, and there was nowhere to turn, no shoulder to cry on.

Immortality was more of a curse than a gift, as many would suppose. You were truly bound to the world in which you live, and there's no escaping it. Being an Alicorn had been a dream that many had hoped to achieve. They didn't really think fully about the consequences that would befall them, should that idle wish become a reality. But for Twilight, it had.

At first, she had taken the power as a gift, something that would only enhance her life and make her very pleased. She had long lived in the present, rarely looking that far into her future, when she was bestowed a pair of wings, and the responsibility that stems from them. It was in her blood now, something that would last forever, stemming from her very core, to her very roots.

And so the days from the passing of the last of her friends turned into months, and the months into years, and those years into decades, until few even recognized the name on the simple plaque that resided in the Ponyville Cemetery. And yet, she continued to seclude herself from socialization, maintaining only her royal duties as a Princess of Equestria, and little more. She almost never visited Ponyville anymore. What was left to visit? Even Spike had finally upped and died, and visiting her friends' tombstones only added to the already immense sorrow that now dominated her life.

They were gone. They would always be gone. And there was no-where left to go, no hope of seeing them. All she had, all she would ever have, are the memories. Memories that were like ever flowing replays of the same show, waiting for the next episode. An episode that would never come, leaving her with only the most desolate wasteland of her mind. But she wasn't here to consider that.

She had stopped visiting those old memories nearly a century ago. They weren't of any use to her anymore, just the bitter dreams of a lonesome mare. And yet, she never gave up the hope. Hope that she could see them again, even if but once. Recollection was her way of dreaming, and it was time to dream again. It was time to remember.

Chapter 1

"Wake up Twilight! The Library's about to open!"

If it weren't for Spike, Twilight would have been fairly ill equipped to deal with the responsibilities of running an entire library on her own. This would inevitably been disastrous, considering the fact that her usual bed time was somewhere between 3 and 4 A.M. How can someone as studious as her help it if she wants to finish her notes on great works such as "The Harmonic Theory and You: an Idiot's Guide to Existential Metaphysics?" Such books were gold!

"C'mon, Twi! We've got to open up! This isn't a private business, is it?"

For someone as young as a barely post-infantile drake, Spike was more than mentally prepped enough to not only run a library, but also find time to do his own reading. Granted, he'd be technically old enough to be considered a young adult in pony society and of perfect age of consent should any mare have wished a deeper relationship, but he was still barely into toddlerhood as far as dragons themselves are concerned.

With a grunt of displeasure, Twilight shifted her weight onto her hind hooves, lifting herself out of the messy bed. It had been a rather rough night, to say the least. How a mare like her could fail to get some decent shuteye was beyond her. Ever since becoming a princess, she'd often worried about the fact that there would be coming responsibilities soon enough. It may have been a couple of years since her crowning, but there was no denying the inevitable. If she couldn't even hardly run a library, how could she possibly hope to run an entire nation?

With lots and lots of bureaucrats, of course, she thought to herself. How do you think Celestia does it? Running the name of her mental mouth still left her almost as tongue tied as saying so aloud would have. It was odd, being equals with someone whom she had considered as her entire world at one point. But there's no denying one's fate, it seems.

"Just a minute, Spike! Just let me wake up, okay?"

There was no point in telling him what had actually been going on whenever she actually managed to get some sleep. A slight blush flooded her face when she recalled what she'd just been dreaming about as she took the now soiled sheets down to the laundry. What he didn't know certainly wouldn't hurt him, and mixing him up in things that were far beyond his years at this point would be rather...foalish.

Still, dreaming about being rutted in multiple ways by five different stallions while having a hot wax candle melting on one's flank was a good sign that she was probably entering her fourth estrous cycle, unfortunately. Great, now every time I go around Sweet Apple Acres, I'll be trying to get heavily rutted by Big Mac. Just the thought of that started making her vulva tingle in rather interesting ways.

Maybe that wouldn't be such a bad thing, Twi. At least it would get it out of your system.

"Yeah, until I was with foal and stuck living out my life with an apple farmer!"

Really? I figured Alicorns were long lived as it was?

"Shut up, you! I didn't ask for your input."

We're the same mare, dumbass! Insulting me is akin to insulting yourself.

"I said to shut it!"

There was a rather brief pause before a voice rose up from down below. "Um, Twi? Are you talking to yourself again?" Spike asked, seeming just by his voice to already know the answer. "You really should consider seeing that doctor I was talking about. I've been saying the same thing since that time you were tardy with your letter to the Princess." Twilight shuddered at just the mere recollection of that incident. It was probably best not to make a habit of repeating it.

This doctor he's referring to, isn't he a stallion? Maybe he can take care of our...problem. Twilight visibly shook at just the thought of having his dick pumping into her vagina, spewing streams of his seed into her system while she screams out in utter ecstasy...Stop that!

"I'm fine, Spike. Just working some stuff out up here!"

"Alright, if you say so."

He was a rather loyal young dragon, that one. Always faithful to the end, it seemed. I really should start to take into account that he's growing up, Twilight thought to herself as she proceeded to brush the tangles out of her bedraggled mane. Seriously, he's done everything for you and for all of your friends. Well, they were his friends too. There was really no denying that. Still...

Twilight finished prepping herself, looking just as clean and neat as ever. After all, how a mare presents herself reflect upon her personally. The lavender mare trotted down the stairs to the library door, unlocking it and turning to the sign from "closed" to "open" right before she would have been late. Her number one assistant sure came in handy sometimes.

"10:00 A.M. sharp, as always."

And as always, nopony came in for nearly half an hour. The only person to ever really come in the moment the sign changed was Rainbow Dash when she was looking for another Daring Doo book, or maybe Fluttershy for another copy of some book for curing different ailments that her animal friends would drag in from time to time. Entire sections of the library went by unused by anypony but Twilight, Spike, and sometimes this strange doctor with an hour glass on his flank. His nice, firm, delectable flank. And of course, the jewels that were held just by the-

If you don't stop that, I'll find a way to buck you, so help me Celestia!

Her mind shut up at that. Good lord, estrous sucked. It sucked almost as bad as she'd suck some stallion's good, long, hard cock right about- Gah!! Twilight knew that she couldn't stay pent up in the library all day. Her mound was already practically dripping, and it wasn't helping to stay cooped up all day in one place. Yeah, that was the surest way for her to get convinced that pregnancy was a minor cost to a larger marginal benefit. The economist within her was probably having a hay-day at just the thought of it. As were her nether regions.

Fucking stop!

Twilight blushed when she realized she'd just cursed in her own mind. A mare of her quality really preferred not to swear, but sometimes even she got desperate. I really need a chill pill. With that, she walked over to the front door, kindly asking Spike to keep the place in order. As always, he faithfully replied with a "Well, why not?" statement, and went back to reading whatever it was in his draconic claws.

She took flight as soon as she was out the door, flying rather slowly and clumsily as she headed over to Sweet Apple Acres. If there was anything to keep her mind off of having casual sex with every stallion she saw, it was by working up an appetite. And besides, she was still new to using these things she called "wings" anyways.

Soaring over the orchard, Twilight looked for a certain cyan colored mare. If there was anything she knew about Rainbow Dash, it was that she was inevitably asleep in some tree or other right about then. Taking stock of her surroundings, it didn't take more than a few minutes to locate the prismatic mare. Having a mane with every color in the spectrum does make it rather hard to blend in with anything other than a true rainbow, doesn't it?

Trying to use the forms she'd been shown by her friend over the last few months, Twilight did her best attempt to perch somewhere in the tree. It wasn't really her fault when she slammed right into the trunk, knocking Rainbow off of her branch. The cyan pegasus fell with a startled "woah!" before slamming face first into the ground.

"Oops, hehe, sorry Rainbow."

"Ng-huh? Oh, hi Twi. What're you doing here? I thought practice was at like three."

"Yeah, it was. I was going to wait, but there's absolutely nothing to do at the library! I was just so bored." Well, that was exactly entirely true. There was one thing she could do, but she'd rather not sit there thinking about having sex with every stallion in Ponyville while trying to read a full version of "Les Miserables" or something.

"I feel ya, sister! Well, what should we work on today?" Rainbow seemed pensive for a moment, before looking back at the tree where Twilight had crashed through the branches. Taking it in with an expert eye, Rainbow Dash started thinking of what was really needed there.

"Okay, I can see your skill at landing needs some TLC, so we're going to start there today..."

Twilight groaned in frustration. This had been her typical regiment half the time, Rainbow always insisting that they work on just managing to gracefully get out of the air before even focusing on anything as "advanced" as basic flight. It was almost insulting, actually. But she did realize that Rainbow, not her, was the expert in this area, and decided to continue doing as instructed. Still, crashing into every tree in Sweet Apple Acres was a sure way to earn some nice little bruises.

As it turns out, Applejack was rather pleased to have them practicing in her orchard. Every time Twilight managed to slam into a tree, she'd been waiting down below with some open barrels so as to reap the rewards. She commented something about "Saves me an Macintosh a hay load of time buckin' these suckers!" and occasionally "Landsakes, girl! At this rate we'll have enough money to by Granny a new hip!" Let's just say it wasn't a really pleasant afternoon, for Twilight at least.

Rainbow could hardly concentrate well enough to finish giving instructions, she was laughing so hard. The only thing that really stopped Twilight from quitting right then and there was the fact that her crashes did seem to slowly lessen in count as the day dragged on. She found herself rewarded by a more precise way of landing, but it still hurt like hell.

"Okay, Twilight. I think we've done enough today."

Those words were like gold to Twilight's ears, and she found herself rather pleased with how things turned out. Needless to say, it was a rather interesting experience even to her. Rainbow flew over to her, and draped a wing over her shoulder.

"You know, buddy, if you ever want to hang out, my place is open to ya. Just knock and if I'm there, I'll answer."

And with that, the cyan mare took off at a rather insane rate. Twilight just shook her head at the sight. There was no way in heaven, hell, nor earth that she could ever hope to match that, but it was worth dreaming about. Sure was a lot better than dreaming about massive stallions sticking their-

"Can ah have some help carrying these back, Twi?" Applejack asked, a somewhat weird look on her face when she noticed the creepy grin and drool running down her friend's face.

"Huh? Oh, oh! Sorry Applejack, just had a rather...interesting...thought."

"You're in estrous, arentcha?"

Twilight was somewhat taken aback when Applejack cut to the chase like that. "How did you know?" Twilight asked, finding it odd that someone like Applejack could see right through her like that.

"Landsakes, girl! It's not like ah haven't been through one myself before. Listen, ah don't want ya gettin' too near mah brother unless you actually wanted to have foals, ya hear? Seriously, ah had to stay away from him for like a month when ah went through mah last cycle."

"Applejack!"

"Applejack nothin'! Just because we're siblings don't mean nothin' to mah body. All it sees is a big, strong stallion with just as large a dick. Ah didn't want ta go doin' nothin' bad with him, so ah sealed mahself away fer a while. Don't blame me, blame the buckin' hormones." The apple farmer chuckled at the last bit, but then took a rather serious look to her face. "But seriously, Twi. Ya might want to take care of yer problem. It'll just get worse if'n ya don't release it."

"What do you mean, Applejack?"

"Ya know, with yer hoof?"

"Huh?"

"Never mind."

As Twilight opened the front door to the library, she felt more exhausted than she could possibly imagine. It was rather comforting, however, to have a moment of peace from the usual onslaught of smexy thoughts that had been plaguing her mind almost all day. As she set her saddlebags down near the door, she heard the sounds of cooking from the kitchen. A subtle glance into the room was all Twilight needed to see to tell her that Spike was baking yet another jewel encrusted cake. A soft smile donned her lips at that. He may be far more mature than when they first moved to Ponyville, but that didn't really stop the young dragon from enjoying the pleasure of eating his own cakes.

Walking quietly up the stairs, Twilight closed her door. If she was ever going to get any sleep, the surest way was by physical exhaustion, of course. Taking everything in stride, the lavender princess simply slumped into her bed, hoping that sleep would soon take her into a tight Kimura submission hold.

Sleep, however, was just as stubbornly resistant as she was. Sighing in frustration, she got up walked over to the bathroom. She took one look in the mirror before letting out a long, sad sigh. The pony looking back at her looked rather forlorn and lonesome, and she couldn't help but feel some pity towards her.

We call that "self pity," Genius.

"Could you please stop that?"

Why? Who else could you talk to about this right now but yourself?

Twilight just looked down in defeat. "I don't know, Twilight, I don't know." She looked back up in the mirror for a moment, before a grin started to spread on her face. "Actually, I do know!" Turning around, she ran practically head over hoof down the stairs, passing by a startled Spike as she left the building for the second time that day.

"What's got her mane?" Spike wondered aloud as he started munching on his new gem encrusted pastry, glad he managed to finish it this time. "Who?" came from nearby, and Spike answered with a simple "Twilight, but you already knew that." Chuckling, he sat back to enjoy his feast.

The new princess trotted down the street a ways before spreading her wings to take flight. Mentally running through the little checklist of things she'd learned from Rainbow Dash, she prepared herself for a good old high altitude flight. Taking off had become a cinch over time, and right then was no exception.

Twilight hit the air like a freight train, dashing into the air as fast as she could. One didn't become quick by jogging. It was the all out sprint that mattered in that regard, and Twilight wasn't dumb enough to ignore that fact. She was soon far above Ponyville, looking down at its gentle features and flowing landscape from afar. Pleased with herself, she began to look around for her destination.

Rainbow Dash had always been rather proud of the house that she herself had crafted, saying that most pegasi didn't bother to put so much effort into their living space. It wasn't like the thing was made of the same type of clouds as most of them used around. No, making a piece of cloud worthy of living in took care and precision, and didn't come easily.

Twilight landed on the front steps, glad that her new found princess-hood had paid off in one aspect. Falling through clouds never really appealed to anypony. The lavender mare strode up the steps to knock on the front door, waiting for a response. And she knocked. And knocked. And maybe, just maybe, knocked some more.

Wondering what was up, she started flying around the mansion, wondering what was up. Rainbow Dash was largely nocturnal, so didn't make sense for her to be asleep so soon after the sun had just set. Decidedly ignoring protocol, Twilight flew back to the front door and entered.

She had been to the house a couple of times since gaining her wings, but it still amazed her at how well kept and maintained a mansion this size could be when cared for by only one mare, let alone somepony like Rainbow Dash. Since cloud houses were a form of pride to a pegasus, it didn't faze Twilight too much that her prismatic friend would maintain such a great upkeep where she lived.

Deciding that if Rainbow were asleep, she'd probably be in her room, Twilight hit the nearby stairs. She was about ready to knock when she started hearing grunting sounds emanating from within. Her nethers were immediately wet, and idle curiosity got the best of her pretty quickly. Making sure not to be too loud in her exit, Twilight flew out the front door and swung around the side to see what was going on. She reached the window to Rainbow Dash's bedroom, and guiltily blushed as she looked in.

Rainbow Dash was moaning rather voraciously as Soarin' pumped his cock into her, bobbing his flank in the rather strict rhythm of an experienced master. The pegasus stallion was starting to grunt himself from the exertion of what had obviously been going on for a while now, and Twilight couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy that it would be Rainbow who was getting laid with the handsome stallion and not her.

"Ngh! Oh Soarin, this is amazing!"

"Glad you, ah! Like it."

Twilight could feel her cunt literally dripping with precum at just the sight of them rutting, and found the entire situation rather enticing. Sitting down near the windowsill, she decided to let her voyeuristic mood play out. It was really too hard to resist anyways, so why bother?

The lavender mare watched as Soarin's nice, firm flank pulled forward and back as he thrusted. She could see just the corner of his scrotum as his balls bounced against her friend's rump as he hilted her. Twilight knew it was probably wrong, but she couldn't help but watch as her friend let out another moan, nor could she even hesitate to stare at the look on her face as Soarin' began pumping more erratically.

Apparently they had been at it for while, because it wasn't that long before Rainbow came all over her partner's shaft, screaming out as the shockwaves of her orgasm hit like a rocket. That was all it took for Soarin' to get off, and he started to cum all over her pussy. Twilight even hot a full view of his cock when he pulled it out, trying not to shoot too much seed into his companion.

The stallion lay down next to the cyan mare, panting for breath as he leaned over and kissed her. They lay back for a few moments, enjoying each others' company. Twilight realized that she should probably get going...Rainbow looked up at her window, probably intending to look at the stars. Instead, she saw Twilight staring right back. A moment of shock passed between both of them, before a snarl formed on Rainbow's normally composed features.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE?! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE YOU STUPID BITCH!!!"

Dash flew over as quickly as she could, violently bucking Twilight in the face. The alicorn reeled at the sudden onslaught, falling away from her friend's house. The world started to fade into black as she felt herself slam into another cloud, saving her from impacting into something harder. As she gasped for breath, Twilight began to really regret her actions. She felt rather ashamed, and didn't really hold it against Rainbow for reacting as she did. Would I have done any different? she wondered as consciousness left her.

Chapter 2

Twilight sat up groggily in her bed. This was the fifth night in a row, and even she knew what that meant. A part of her wanted to wave it off as a mood swing or some type of chemical unbalance. In a way it was, but the inner scientist in her wouldn't allow the lavender alicorn a chance to deny it to anyone, even herself. There was something she had, and she'd just have to fight through it like everypony else. Like everymare else.

Estrous.

The word seemed to clash against the sides of her brain and bring out the worst in her. She'd just slept through five nights of wet dreams straight, and the kept getting more and more in depth. It would be nice to just shrug it off at that, but it got even worse. Much, much worse. There was one thing, one pony for who was featured in the majority of her subconscious fantasies: Rainbow Dash.

At first she'd figured that it was just a random occurrence, but after four of the last five nights involving that cyan colored mare, there really was no denying it. And yet Twilight tended towards stallions, so what the hell was going on? It could just be brushed off as only having to do with her as a good side note to the various partners that Twilight saw her go through, but it wasn't even that. One of the dreams involved HER with Rainbow, and there wasn't even a stallion in sight! Twilight's cheeks turned a vibrant red at the last thought.

"I'm fucked."

That's all that could really be said about it. She knew there was something going on here, but she couldn't quite place it. After all, they were old friends, not lovers, right? Well, her brain seemed to find it funny in saying otherwise. It seemed to have a mind of its own, and sat back laughing while she tried desperately to get a reign on it.

Twilight walked into her bathroom, trying to see why her head was so damn sore. It didn't take more than a moment to establish why. "Oh shit," she muttered when she saw the massive lump on her forehead. "How the hell did I get that?" It was too early to think about it, so she decided to go check up on Spike instead.

Walking downstairs, she found her number one assistant and dear friend already up and baking himself yet another of his nasty concoctions. What a surprise, eh? Why he enjoys eating gems, which are just glorified rocks, she'd never know. He was a dragon, but still. Would a daisy and daffodil sandwich hurt? Twilight smirked at that. What was she thinking? He is a dragon, and they can eat whatever they please.

"Morning Spike."

"Hey Twi! Oh, I already made you breakfast," he replied, pointing over towards the kitchen table. As always, the young drake had a tenacity towards giving her exactly what she needed without even needing to ask. He really was one of the kindest spirits anyone could ever ask for.

"By the way," he started, moving over to sit across from his long-time friend and companion. "I heard you crashing into your headboard last night. Are you sure you aren't dreaming anything too...you know?"

"I'm fine Spike!" she snarled, before drawing back rather ashamed. Do I normally act like this? she mused. Looking back at her assistant, she saw one of the most downtrodden looks one could ever find. Oh crap, did I just do that to him?

"I'm sorry Spike, I didn't mean to snap at you like that. I just...I need to sort some things out."

"That's okay, Twilight. I understand. How about you take the day off and take a look around town, get some fresh air?" Spike spoke with the natural wisdom one attains when spending years under the same roof as an eccentric genius like Twilight. In a way, he was her foil, always drilling in common sense when she needed it.

"Thank you, Spike. I...I'm sorry about, you know..."

"It's okay, you're not really yourself today. Some fresh air and a good day off is always the best tonic for something like this. Besides, it's not like this is exactly the busiest place in town, is it?"

The lavender mare stood up after finishing her delicious meal, and walked up the stairs to her room. She proceeded to do what she always did; getting her mane styled in its usual fashion without a hair or strand out of place. Who would respect someone walking around town with bed hair? Nopony, that's for sure. She looked in the mirror to make sure everything was in place, then strode out of the library with a rather chipper gait.

Well, I'm obviously in heat, and I don't know what the hell is going on about it. Who would be the best candidate to ask? The choice was rather obvious, when she thought about it. There was only one mare in all of Ponyville who knew the ins and outs about relationships and that kind of stuff.

Rarity.

"But darling, Rainbow Dash?"

"Well, she's been in all of them so far. Why?"

"I just never thought of someone like you going for somepony like Rainbow Dash. I thought you were more high class than...that," Rarity said, looking at Twilight as if she'd grown another head or something.

"What's your problem with Rainbow Dash?" Twilight asked, seeming somewhat taken aback by Rarity's attitude towards one of her "best" friends. The lavender mare was more than a little confused by the whole situation as she brought the chamomile tea to her lips.

"Oh, no no no no, Darling! I didn't mean it like that. I would never say anything wrong to one of my dearest and closest friends. I'm just wondering why you would want that type of relationship with her. I mean, she's a great friend and all, but I wouldn't find her to be your type. Of course..." Rarity trailed off as if struck by a sudden revelation. Perhaps inspiration does come in the form of a lightning bolt, carefully packaged and delivered from Zeus, after all.

"Darling, you simply must ask Rainbow out on a date!"

"WHAT?!"

"Oh, this is going to be so wonderful!" Rarity continued, completely ignoring her distraught friend's reaction as she rambled on. "It's like love at first sight! Neither of you would know why you're so attracted to one another, but that wouldn't stop anything. You'd soon find yourselves wondering why you haven't been together yet, but then you'd begin to hide it from each other, just like in one of Nicky Sparks novels! Oh, this is going to be so fantabulous!"

"Uh, Rarity?"

"And then what would the foals look like? I'm sure you two will figure out a way of course, darling. After all, your magical prowess is legendary!"

"Rarity."

"It all makes sense now. I mean, you are both the most powerful of your respective races. This should have been obvious from the start-"

"RARITY!!"

"Huh, what Darling?"

"I never said I was attracted to Rainbow Dash," Twilight commented with an exasperated tone. Maybe choosing to get advice from the over-enthusiastic fashionista was the worst choice rather than the best. She let out a tired sigh as she looked into Rarity's gleaming eyes.

"I just want to know how to settle this matter."

"Wait...you don't know?"

"Uh, no."

"Why with your hoof, Darling. Haven't you ever tried that?"

"Uh, what?" Twilight asked, now more than a little confused.

"You know," Rarity said, looking now somewhat shocked and annoyed. "Rubbing yourself off?"

"Um, how does that work?"

Rarity let out a soft groan, wondering how the hell Twilight hadn't at least heard of a hoof job before. She really didn't know what to do with the anti-social mare. It was honestly like she lived in a cave or something! Well, maybe she did know...

"Come with me Darling. I'm not going to make this a...regular thing. But you need to learn a few...things."

The alabaster unicorn turned around without another comment, leaving a slightly confused Twilight to follow along right behind her. Rarity knew her friend was in estrous, she could easily smell it. Well, here was the opportunity. Twilight had a hard time not rushing forward and dry humping the fashionista when she noticed Rarity's tail swishing back and forth, revealing a wholesome plot, and a rather pert, taught pussy.

Rather than drooling, she just shook her head. Not the time for that, Twilight! She probably doesn't even mean it that way!! They rounded the corner into Rarity's bedroom, where the white mare lay down luxuriously on her bed. Turning around, she spread her legs widely, fully exposing an already blinking vagina. Maybe she does mean it like that...Me gusta.

"Darling, here is your first lesson in how to hoof yourself. Can you go lay on that sofa over there? Face me so you can watch my movements."

Twilight didn't hesitate to flop down on the fashionista's drama couch, promptly spreading her own legs in a similar manner. Rarity seemed to assess her friend's marehood with and inquisitive eye, and as far as Twilight could tell, she seemed to like it. Well this is new.

Rarity suddenly put her hoof over her mound, rotating in rather tight circles. She let out a soft sigh as if she were only massaging a rather knotted muscle rather than her own genitals. Twilight decided to follow suit, and elicited a gasp when she felt her hoof tweaking her mound. The lavender mare quickly pulled away her hoof, and inspected the wet substance covering the tip of it.

"Darling, ngh! You can't get off by staring at it."

The alabaster mare was beginning to moan softly with each motion, every stroke obviously sending waves of pleasure up her soft, slender body. Twilight promptly placed her own hoof back where she was told, returning to the motions that she'd just seen her friend doing. A moan of her own escaped her lips. Dang, is this what I've been missing out on?

The two friends got to work with their own pussies, taking time to fervently rub up against their own folds. After a while, Twilight started to feel a growing heat in her nethers as something began to build up inside of her. Her gasps were starting to get more erratic, and Rarity noticed that. She was starting to get that way herself, and hearing Twilight moaning erotically wasn't helping prevent her from climaxing.

Oh, this is so sexy, we'll need to do this more often. Should I warn her?

"Ahh, Twilgiht?"

"Ungh, yes?"

"Rub that nub at the top of ngh! Your folds. It's called a "clit."

Twilight did just that, feeling an immense jump in the level of pleasure peeling through her system. It didn't take very long for her to cum, and seeing the lavender mare's orgasm was all it took for Rarity to have her own. The two bucked their hips violently to their hooves as they rode out the raging torrent that was rushing through their systems.

Once both of them had finished masturbating in front of each other, they both lay back on the respective furniture, resting from the physical exertion of the act. Panting, Twilight looked up to meet Rarity's gaze. "That wasn't sex, right?"

"Of course not, Darling!"

"Then maybe we could, you know..."

"Do that again? That would be...nice."

"I've got to go back to the library, but we can do this again at another time. Maybe like with your spa trips with Fluttershy. You know, once a week?"

"Darling, what do you think we've been doing at the spa? Don't worry, I'll pay your fare."

Rather than feeling better rested, Twilight felt more than a little spent when she walked through the door to the library. And yet, that was probably the most enjoyable highlight to her entire life. I know, it's rather sad if jerking off with your best friend is the high point of your life, but such is the life of a bookworm. With a groan, the lavender mare pulled herself up towards her room.

"Twilight? How'd it go?"

"Um, not right now Spike. I'm rather tired. But it did go quite...well."

The drake curled his snout at the rank odor drifting off of Twilight. "I can smell that from here, you know. What have you been up to?"

"Uh, uh...I said not right now, Spike. I'll tell you later," she lied, trying desperately to avoid the entire situation. Reaching the door to her room, Twilight slumped down on her bed. Oh how she'd like some sleep right then, but life seemed to be catching up to her. That and it was pretty hard to shake the memory of Rarity's fully exposed marehood winking at her.

"Ugh! I'm not getting sleep anytime soon like this, am I?"

Standing up, she tip-toed over to her door, gently closing it so that Spike wouldn't hear it and get at all suspicious. The young mare slumped back down on her back, careful to spread her wings so as not to hurt them. Oh sweet Celestia, I'm feeling so...horny right now! Well, there's really only one solution for that. Without another moment's hesitation, Twilight's hoof found its way down to her now dripping folds.

"Hey, Twi. You ready for some more training?"

"Um...sure!"

"Well, today is a rather special form of a workout. You down for it?"

"Whatever you say, Rainbow Dash."

"Okay, then walk over there. I need you to lay down gently, okay?"

Twilight moaned out load, not even bothering to mask her apparent lust as her hoof started to vigorously rub her taught pussy. She was already bucking her hips, shockwaves of pleasure slapping through her body as she rubbed herself far more enthusiastically than at Rarity's.

Spike heard the bed creaking downstairs, and started to grow a little worried. What's gotten into that mare? I haven't heard her jumping on the bed since she was a filly. He paused for a moment, considering. Wasn't she tired?

"C'mon, Twilight! HARDER!! You don't want to be like one of those saps that doesn't learn how to fly, do you?!"

"N-no ma'am!"

"Then rub me harder! I'm already all over your clit, can't you feel that?"

Spike walked slowly up there stairs, now starting to get scared. Why was Twilight moaning so loud? The young drake was curious as to what was going on up there. I hope she's alright. What if someone's doing something to her?! With that, he rushed forward and swung open the door to her room. What he saw surprised him immensely.

"Oh Twilight, you're amazing! I've never felt this good before!"

"Nor me, Dashie. You know I love you."

"I love you to. Now get back to work!"

"Oh, you know it, babe."

What Spike saw he would forever immortalize as both the most disgusting and the most Celestia damned sexy thing he ever had or ever would see. The young drake barely managed to keep his cock from immediately going hard at the sight. HOT DAMN!! An intense blush crossed his face as he saw his oldest friend bucking her hips violently as she rubbed herself like you or I would when scrubbing out a grease stain. Her moans were definitely not helping the dragon resist the urge to jack off right then and there.

"Uh, Twilight? What're you doing?"

"Twilight, you're doing an excellent job! I'd have to say this is going to be an academy record!"

"Twilight?"

"Twilight, I'm cumming in ten seconds flat!"

"Twilight!"

"Oh Twilight!!

"Twilight!" Spike shouted, trying to break her from the intense reverie he was seeing. This is so wrong! it seemed to the young drake. I shouldn't be feeling this way! He stared in awe as Twilight let out a final scream, her hips slapping against the bed, making the bedsprings groan in protest to her constant slamming. Spike's face was covered in a deep blush just as Twilight's was covered in beads of sweat.

"T-twilight?"

The lavender mare looked over at her assistant, suddenly realizing what had happened. It was far too late to take it back, and her heart started beating a staccato upon the realization that he'd been sitting there for a while. The erect member sticking out through the slit at the base of his torso didn't help.

"SPIKE?! GET OUT SPIKE!!!"

"Twilight?"

"I SAID GET OUT!! GET OUT OF MY ROOM, GET OUT OF MY LIBRARY!!"

"Twilight?!"

"GET OUT!! I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOUR SLIMY FACE AGAIN!"

Spike found himself rather quickly surrounded by a wall of magic, quickly thrown out of her room like some sort of monster, only to slam into the opposite wall. He slid down to the ground as Twilight slammed the door to her room shut with a loud thunk! The young drake stood up gasping for breath as he stumbled towards the library door. Tears stung his eyes as he turned around one last time to look at the library he'd once loved. Without a single farewell, the noble drake left his home behind him, softly closing the door.

What have I done? Twilight wondered as she fell to her knees by her bed. He didn't do anything wrong. That was...that was me. Tears started to drip down her face as she started to realize something. Just like in my dream with Rainbow...Only I actually did it, didn't I? There was only one thing crossing her mind as she wailed out loud.

She had just kicked out the one true friend she'd had since her earliest childhood for something that was her bad, and she hated herself for it. The lavender mare couldn't stop sobbing at that point. It wasn't Spike that didn't deserve to live with her, it was she who didn't deserve to live with him. And the worst part was that it had always been this way.

Back from the very beginning, all Twilight had ever really done was use him. Sure, he was a friend. But who gave and who took? He threw his neck out there for her more times than she could possibly count, and when had she ever returned the favor? That's not friendship, that's just using a means to an end. She called him her assistant, but who was the wiser of the two? Who'd been there for who all along? And she'd just thrown him out like garbage. And only one type of pony does something like that: Garbage.

I'm a horrible pony.