Chapters Chapter 1: Ponies? Weird Tall things?
Of Ponies and Jaffas
By: Pen Brush and Slayerbrony
“Alright, I think I have done it Honeydew! I think I have done it!” Xephos exclaimed trotting into the living room of him and his friend’s home, holding a scroll in front of him. “Thanks to Lalna, I have finally cracked the spell that will make our simulations even more realistic! This will certainly help the audience love our little actions even more!”
“Do I still get to dig?” Honeydew asked, standing up to look at his red, unicorn friend.
“Do you ever do anything else? Other than blow things up?” Xephos snickered as he walked over to a bench and sat down.
“I make terrible houses.” Honeydew laughed.
“That you do!” Xephos said joining in the laughter before wiping a tear from his eye and rereading the scroll to make sure he hadn’t missed anything. “Okay... So what I have done is edited the spell so that everything is much more realistic, not only for us, but the audience as well. Like you can smell the grass, and feel the pickaxe hitting the stone when you mine.”
“Cool.” Honeydew said. Xephos rolled his eyes at his friend before tapping his chin.
“Hmm. I just can’t help thinking that I missed something on this though. Lalna said it was perfect, but Celestia knows he messed up several times during his own show.” Xephos chuckled looking back over to spell.
“Then maybe you should test it?” Honeydew said, tilting his head as he trotted over to the bench and sat down next to Xephos, easily being dwarfed by him.
“I would my small friend, but usually when Lalna does it, things tend to blow up. Or try to eat him.” Xephos said sticking his tongue out as he concentrated. “I know it’s just a simulation but still.”
“Then why worry?” Honeydew asked.
“Because I am not so small, I can fit through a trapdoor.” Xephos said ruffling his friend’s mane.
“Then if you’re worried just test it outside or something.” Honeydew shrugged.
“Okay fine. Come on, I don’t want to be alone incase I spawn some hideous demon.” Xephos said putting Honeydew on his back and walking outside. He stepped into the air outside and walked over into the grass that made up their home. “Alright. Let’s see if I did it correctly or not.”
“Either it works or you make a real bomb.” Honeydew said from Xephos’s back.
“Oh thanks for the vote of confidence.” Xephos said shaking his head.
“Would you rather me have said a creeper?” Honeydew asked.
“Dear Celestia no.” Xephos said shuddering. His horn lit up with a soft red glow as he concentrated for a moment. “Come on, come on... Just a few... More.. Seconds.”
“HEY GUYS!” Lalna shouted as he teleported in front of them startling Xephos and Honeydew.
“AAAH!” they shouted as Xephos’s horn suddenly turned white and in a bright, and rather colorful, flash they both were gone along with a small patch of dirt.
“.... Uh guys? You okay?” Lalna asked tilting his head and adjusting his lab coat. He looked around before chuckling nervously. “I think I may have messed up... Big time.”
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“Simon! Did you eat all the Jaffas again!?” Lewis shouted as he walked down the hallway.
“Maybe!” Simon yelled back from behind his office door, laughing.
“Ugh! I swear you have an obsession or something.” Lewis groaned as he saw a small crumpled box of Jaffas on the ground.
“You have an obsession with ice cream!” Simon laughed.
“Oh shut up!” Lewis shouted back chuckling a little. There was a small ‘Snap!’ from behind Simon’s office door along with a large red flash of light from under the doorway. Lewis stopped at his door and gently knocked. “Um, Simon? Are you okay in there?”
“LEEEEEWWWISSSS!” Simon yelled after a few seconds. Lewis panicked for a second before grabbing the handle and nearly ripping, not really more like dramatically opening, the door.
“SIMON!... What are you yelling about?” Lewis said looking around Simon’s office.
“Them.” Simon said pointing at a red unicorn with a brown mane and tail and a small orange pony with a yellow mane and tail, piled up in the corner. Lewis stared at them for a moment before turning to Simon.
“Simon, I know you liked that mod, but did you really have to scream for me to see them? I mean they are just plushies.” Lewis deadpanned.
“They aren't mine!” Simon yelled defensively.
“Sure, just like how all this Jaffa boxes aren’t yours.” Lewis said kicking a few boxes of cookies away.
“Let me sleep more Xephos...” The orange pony muttered. Lewis just turned to Simon and deadpanned again.
“I am standing right here Simon, and why did you say my Username?” Lewis asked walking over to the pile of ponies.
“I didn't...” Simon said, watching Lewis walk over to the ponies.
“Oh sure.” Lewis said rolling his eyes and picking up the small orange pony like he was a puppy. “Very life like I will give you that.”
The orange pony opened its eyes and screamed in terror, “AAAAAHHHH!!!”
“AAAAAAAAH!!” Lewis shouted in surprise, accidently tossing the orange pony at Simon. Simon caught the pony quickly and looking at it.
“Awwwwwww! It’s cute!” He said, looking up at Lewis with a smile.
“Simon! That thing isn’t... Whatever it is! It’s not normal!” Lewis shouted backing up a bit. “I swear this is just like that stupid creeper incident!”
“You're not normal to me mate.” The orange pony said, turning to look at Lewis.
“See?! Ponies don’t talk! Much less are extremely colorful!” Lewis said.
“Buck you too then.” The pony said.
“What?!” Lewis said getting an expression of confusion, slightly insulted, and slight annoyance.
“BUCK YOU!” The pony yelled, before jumping off of Simon and over to the red pony in the corner, “Wake up Xephos! Your spell went wrong or something!” The pony said, shaking the red pony.
“Eh, just five more minutes mum.” Xephos said sleepily grabbing the orange pony and hugging him.
“Lewis?” Simon asked, looking at Lewis.
“Yeah, Simon?” Lewis asked looking at the small cluster of ponies.
“This is cute.” Simon said as the pony tried to get out of ‘Xephos’s’ grasp.
“I guess so, but we still need to figure out where these things came from!” Lewis said walking over and standing next to Simon.
“Maybe they came from the mod.” Simon suggested.
“XEPHOS WAKE UP!!” The orange pony said, yelling into the red ponies ear.
“Srnk... Wha? Honeydew? Why are you in my arms?” Xephos asked looking down at his small friend.
“You were hugging me like your teddy bear.” Honeydew said.
“Again?” Xephos whined.
“Yes again, you need to stop doing that when I try waking you up.” Honeydew grumbled.
“But you are all small and fluffy.” Xephos defended as he got up and shook himself a bit.
“Doesn’t mean I’m a teddy bear!” Honeydew yelled, “We have a problem!”
“Did we run out of cupcakes again?” Xephos asked.
“No...your spell didn't work.” Honeydew said.
“What!? Ho-.... Grrrr... LALNAAAAAA!!” Xephos shouted shaking a clenched hoof at the ceiling. That was when Duncan walked into the room and stared off for a moment.
“I am literally two offices down, you don’t need to shout.” Duncan said annoyed.
“We didn’t call for you!” Lewis said before pointing to the ponies. “They did!”
“Ya...it wasn't lewis.” Simon said quickly, looking at the two ponies.
“So then who called me? And by my minecraft name at that. Couldn’t be those two ponies in the corner.” Duncan said, looking at the two ponies staring at him.
“Honeydew?” Xephos asked.
“Yes?” Honeydew asked, looking at Xephos.
“Are we in big trouble?” Xephos asked looking down at him.
“I don't know!” Honeydew yelled.
“I don’t know either!” Xephos shouted grabbing Honeydew and clutching him like a sword. “You’ll never take me alive!”
“This isn't affective ever!” Honeydew yelled.
“WOAH! They can talk?!” Duncan said walking into the office and closing the door.
“They have been talking for a minute and now you realize?!” Simon exclaimed.
“Yeah, for a scientist, that is pretty slow.” Lewis commented.
“Oh hush up both of you.” Duncan said scowling. Xephos was still holding Honeydew out and looking between all of them.
“I have a small pony and I am not afraid to use it!” He shouted.
“Put me down!” Honeydew yelled, squirming in Xephos’s grasp.
“I am warning you! He bites!” Xephos shouted again.
“Do you like jaffas?” Simon asked, looking at the orange pony.
“Simon, they are a possible alien race and you ask ‘Do you like jaffas?’?” Lewis deadpanned. “Why not just ask them if they like bees!”
“I like jaffa’s yes, and I like bees.” The orange pony said, smiling. Xephos just stared at Honeydew for a moment before pulling him closer.
“You know we have no idea what those are right? Other than the bees.” Xephos whispered.
“I’m guessing those are the round cake things on the floor that look like the cookies we have in Equestria.” Honeydew said, pointing a hoof at one of the empty boxes with a picture of a Jaffa on it. Xephos just sighed and put Honeydew down.
“See Lewis?” Simon said smugly, looking at Lewis.
“For all we know, those are the same as a small dog for them.” Lewis deadpanned.
“Um... They are the small cake things right?” Xephos asked pointing at a box hoping Honeydew was right.
“Yes.” Simon said.
“Oh good.” Xephos said wiping the sweat from his brow. “Um... Introductions, I guess?”
“Yes, that would probably be best... Um. You first.” Lewis said nervously.
“I’m Honeydew!” Honeydew said happily.
“And I am Xephos.” Xephos said smiling. “Please to meet you... I guess.”
“Well, I am Lewis.” Lewis said smiling as well seeing them being friendly.
“That’s a weird name.” Honeydew said.
“Be nice.” Xephos scolded lightly tapping Honeydew on the head.
“Sorry.” Honeydew said.
“I’m Simon.” Simon said.
“And I am Duncan.” Duncan said smiling as well. “Um guess that is everybody.”
“Everypony.” Honeydew corrected.
“What?” Duncan asked tilting his head.
“The term is everypony.” Honeydew said.
“Um... I don’t know what you mean, but here we say ‘Everybody’ or ‘Everyone’.” Duncan said scratching his head.
“Ok...” Honeydew said confused.
“Right, well first matter of business is finding that scroll again.” Xephos said putting Honeydew on his back again.
“I think you left it in the house.” Honeydew said.
“You’re kidding.” Xephos said looking back at Honeydew.
“What?” Honeydew asked, tilting his head.
“Oh Celestia damn it.” Xephos said facehoofing. “Great, we are stuck here!”
“Maybe Lalna will find it and help sometime?” Honeydew suggested.
“Dew, knowing him, he probably burned it in an accident.” Xephos said.
“Hey! I am not that bad with my experiments.” Duncan complained.
“You kind of are sometimes.” Simon said.
“Yeah, you have blown up on several occasions.” Lewis added.
“Oh fuck you guys too then.” Duncan said crossing his arms.
“Are you worried about anypony else at home?” Honeydew asked, jumping off Xephos’s back.
“No not really. Sjin is pretty good at keeping things under control and well... That’s about it.” Xephos said shaking his head.
“What about Lomadia?” Honeydew asked.
“Oh Celestia! I forgot about her!” Xephos shouted before beginning to panic in the traditional way a pony would. He trotted in place and began to spin in circles all the while worriedly mumbling to himself. “What if she starts to freak out? What if she tries the spell!? WHAT IF-”
“Jesus Christ calm down!” Lewis said walking over and patting Xephos on the head.
“He is acting just like you would.” Simon said, smiling as he stood up from his chair.
“Oh I don’t get this worked up.” Lewis said as Xephos calmed down and was sitting on his haunches staring at Lewis’s hand.
“What is that and why did it feel good...” Xephos said poking Lewis’s hand.
“What you mean patting you on the head?” Lewis asked. Xephos nodded before Lewis patted his head again making him slightly pur. Lewis raised his eyebrow before gently scratching Xephos’s ears making his leg kick wildly.
“Ooooh... Yeeeeah...” Xephos muttered out as he was in total bliss.
“I think you made him act like a puppy Lewis.” Simon laughed.
“Hey, it feels good alright?” Xephos defended before going back to the scratching and purring. “You try having hoofs and itchy ears. It’s awful.”
“Sooo... They are dog like ponies with tattoos on their rumps?” Duncan asked.
“Don’t you remember the minecraft mod Duncan?” Simon asked.
“Oh yeah, the cutie stamps or whatever.” Duncan said nodding.
“Cutie marks!” Honeydew cut in, sitting on the floor watching Xephos getting scratched.
“Yeah those.” Duncan said, looking at the ponies cutie marks, Honeydew’s being a diamond pickaxe and Xephos’, what he could see while he was enjoying the scratching, had a projection lens that casted some sort of image. Lewis stopped scratching Xephos which made the pony whine in disappointment.
“Awwww....” Xephos complained.
“You really are like a puppy.” Honeydew said, smiling at Xephos.
“Hey! You get your ears scratched and try to act different!” Xephos defended slightly blushing in embarrassment.
“Uhhh...Lewis, what are we going to do?” Simon asked.
“That... Is actually a good question.” Lewis said looking at the ponies. “I guess they could stay here at the offices.”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Simon asked.
“Would you rather take them home with us?” Lewis asked. “I mean, we usually stay late anyway, we can just keep an eye on them and put them to bed when we leave.”
“What bed is here?” Honeydew asked, looking at Lewis.
“Um, I am sure the staff room’s couch is a pull out bed. And other than that, there are plenty of foot rests and chairs to sleep in.” Lewis said scratching his head. Honeydew looked at Lewis a little longer then looked at the computer next to the chair.
“What's that?” He asked as he jumped onto the chair and looked at the computer, “Is that like a projection thing?”
“Kind of.” Duncan said walking over and leaning down. “Think of it like a projector, but it doesn’t cast an image on the wall, but on the glass screen itself.”
“What’s with this thing?” Honeydew asked, hitting the buttons on the keyboard, waking up the computer and watching as the letters appeared on the screen as he sat down and watched.
“... Simon, you broke the pony.” Duncan said looking at Simon.
“How did I break him?! I didn't do anything.” Simon said defensively.
“It’s your computer! Making it your fault.” Duncan said in a ‘Matter OF’ fact’ tone and walking away from the computer.
“That doesn't make any sense!” Simon yelled.
“Neither does Magic!” Duncan said laughing.
“Magic? Where?” Xephos said perking up and looking around the room and turning in circles.
“Your magic.” Honeydew said, still looking at the screen as the letters kept appearing.
“I know I have magic, I am talking about the weird tall thing’s magic.” Xephos said pointing at Duncan.
“We don't have magic...” Simon said, sitting at his computer chair and taking Honeydew off the keyboard and onto his lap, while Honeydew continued to stare at the bright screen.
“I do.” Xephos said smugly, smiling.
“Good for you.” Simon said, petting Honeydew’s head.
“What, you don’t believe me?” Xephos asked almost sounding hurt.
“I believe you, Duncan doesn't.” Simon said, turning his chair around to face Duncan, finally breaking Honeydew out of his staring spell.
“Well of course I don’t. Magic is impossible in the real world.” Duncan said rolling his eyes making Xephos pout.
“But I can do magic!” Xephos said.
“Aw look what you did Duncan! You made him sad!” Lewis said.
“I am sorry! I am just skeptical!” Duncan said.
“Show him Xephos!” Honeydew said, smiling as Simon started petting him again. Xephos smiled too and looked around before his horn lit up and he lifted all the boxes on the ground and tossed them into the garbage.
“See? Magic!” Xephos said smiling even wider. Lewis’s and Duncan’s jaws dropped as they saw the boxes simply float to the trash bin and fall inside.
“We told you!” Honeydew said, laughing as he jumped off Simon and sat on the floor.
“They did.” Simon said shrugging.
“B-but.... That’s not possible...” Duncan said in disbelief.
“Holy Crap...” Lewis said shaking himself out of his stupor.
“I told you I could do Magic.” Xephos said smiling as he trotted over and sat next to Simon. “Anyway... Where are we?”
“Um.. The UK... On earth?” Duncan said unsure.
“Oh! So we are in the United Knieghations?” Xephos asked. “But did you say earth?... Don’t you mean Equus?”
“No.” Simon said.
“Then that means... Oh Luna, Buck me...” Xephos said slumping to the ground and covering his eyes with his hooves. “Then me and Honeydew really ARE stuck here.”
“And it’s all Lalna’s fault.” Honeydew stated.
“I didn’t even do anything!” Duncan shouted. “And you didn’t even know me until seconds ago!”
“Not you!” Honeydew yelled, looking at Duncan.
“Oh... Sorry.” Duncan said sheepishly. Xephos sighed and took his hooves off his eyes before fidgeting with the carpet in a depressed manner.
“This sucks...” He mumbled out sadly.
“I think this is cool, but how did a simulator send us here?” Honeydew asked.
“I don’t know. Usually when I get startled, I just teleport. I guess I was so focused on making another world with the sim, that when I got scared, I made us teleport to another world.” Xephos shrugged.
“Am I going to have to scare you to bring us back?” Honeydew asked.
“That’s not how it works. I have to know where home is, and from where we are right now? That is nearly impossible.” Xephos sighed out.
“I wouldn’t know how magic works, I’m an earth pony who digs holes!” Honeydew shouted as his stomach growled, “I am also hungry...” he said, walking over to a box of jaffa’s and putting his yellow maned head into it to look for a Jaffa.
“What was that about digging holes?” Lewis asked.
“I dig holes, its my special talent and stuff.” Honeydew said in the Jaffabox. Duncan leaned down to Simon and whispered.
“Is it just me? Or is that adorable?” Duncan chuckled out.
“Its adorable.” Simon whispered back.
“Dew, get out of that box.” Xephos said annoyed as he looked at his small companion. Honeydew took his head out of the box and looked at Xephos.
“What's wrong?” He asked.
“Everything, Honeydew!” Xephos shouted standing up. “We are in a new world, one that has weird boxes that can do what I do just fine, if not better! These weird things walking around! No offense. And if that’s not bad enough, WE HAVE NO WAY HOME! THAT’S WHAT’S WRONG!”
“YOU DON'T HAVE TO YELL!” Honeydew yelled.
“I DO HAVE TO YELL TO GET THIS THROUGH THAT THICK SKULL OF YOURS!” Xephos shouted again. Honeydew growled and ran at Xephos with his head low.
“Woah woah woah, let’s just calm down here.” Duncan said picking up Honeydew by the scruff of his neck before a fight would tear their offices apart. “We will try to figure out how to get you home, okay?”
Xephos just narrowed his eyes before sighing in defeat and slumping to the floor again. “Yeah... Okay.”
“Ok.” Honeydew said.
“Good, now can I put you down and not have you two start a war in our business?” Duncan said looking at Honeydew.
“Yes.” Honeydew said. Duncan smiled and put Honeydew down before standing back up and looking around.
“So what now?” Lewis asked looking between the ponies and his friends.
“Find a way to bring them to our house without anyone noticing.” Simon suggested.
“I do have a duffel bag.” Duncan said putting a hand on his chin.
“I guess that would work, although I have no idea where they are going to sleep.” Lewis said scratching his chin.
“In a bed.” Simon said obviously.
“Right right.” Lewis said facepalming. “Okay, I guess they are coming home with us. But we still need to figure out how to get them out of here without them noticing.”
“Who is them?” Honeydew asked, looking up at Lewis.
“Other people?” Lewis deadpanned. “Not to mention our other co-workers and friends.”
“Ok.” Honeydew said, smiling brightly.
“We could say they are colorful puppies.” Simon suggested.
“With a horn?” Duncan asked. “And ass tattoos?”
“Cutie marks.” Xephos corrected.
“I have seen disfigured dogs before, a disfigured dog could be believed to have a bump on their heads.” Simon said shrugging.
“That is a foot off their head?” Lewis asked tapping the tip of Xephos’s horn. Xephos shooed his hand away while Lewis rolled his eyes.
“Yes.” Simon said smiling.
“Fine, whatever, but if we end up getting taken to prison while they get experimented on, it’s your fault.” Lewis said rubbing his head.
“Go to prison for what?” Honeydew asked, confused.
“Well, you are an alien species and let’s just say our government wouldn’t be very happy about us hiding you from them.” Lewis said nervously chuckling.
“Ok...” Honeydew said as a smell wafted through the closed doorway and his ears pointed towards them. Xephos looked at Honeydew before narrowing his eyes.
“Don’t you dare try running for that.” Xephos said sternly.
“But I’m hungry and these boxes have nothing!” Honeydew complained.
“I am hungry too, but we don’t need to go running after the nearest thing that smells good.” Xephos said using his magic to put Honeydew right next to him. “Now sit still.”
“Fine.” Honeydew said, frowning as his ears went back on his head.
“Well if you guys wanted something to eat, why didn’t you just say so?” Duncan asked.
“I put my head into a box.” Honeydew said simply.
“I thought you were just trying to be adorable.” Duncan said shrugging.
“Why would I do that? Is it because I’m small and it’s funny?” Honeydew asked angrily.
“Well no not really. It’s just the fact that you don’t see a pony in a box very often.” Duncan said defensively.
“He does have a point Honeydew. Calm down, you usually don’t care about being called small.” Xephos said tilting his head at his friend.
“From ponies I know.” Honeydew pointed out.
“Yeah, so how is being called small by these gigantic guys any different?” Xephos asked. “Even I am smaller than them.”
“We barely know them.” Honeydew said, shrugging.
“You confuse me.” Xephos said putting a hoof on his temple and rubbing his head.
“I confuse myself.” Honeydew said smiling.
“I know.” Xephos said sighing. Duncan rolled his eyes before leaving the room and coming back with two cups of milk and a plate of Jaffa cakes, since Simon practically stocked the pantry with the boxes of them.
“Well here you go. Something to actually eat that isn’t a misleading empty box.” Duncan snickered as he put the plate down along with the cups of milk.
“Duncan... Did you really have to get them cups? I mean they have hooves.” Lewis deadpanned and looking at Duncan with a ‘Are you kidding me?’ expression.
“What do you think we use to drink?” Honeydew asked, before picking up the cup with his hoof and drinking from it before putting it down and smiling at Lewis with a milk mustache on his lip. Lewis blinked before sighing and rubbing the bridge of his nose.
“Oh right, ponies from an alien world. Don’t abide by the same rules.” Lewis muttered out as Xephos just chuckled and picked up a Jaffa with his magic and nibbled on it. Xephos and Honeydew finished their food after a few minutes.
“So what did you two do where you are from? Like what did you do for a living?” Duncan asked sitting in another chair.
“We played games.” Honeydew said absentmindedly.
“Really? And that’s it?” Duncan asked.
“Well, ‘Played games’ is a term we use loosely. We made simulations and did stuff in them while other ponies watched. Was pretty fun and we earned quite a few bits doing it.” Xephos said smiling.
“Our friends also joined in and we made a sort of series with a storyline.” Honeydew added, smiling.
“Not to mention we occasionally just fooled around and pranked each other.” Xephos said snickering.
“You always using up most of the torches while in the middle of the simulation.” Honeydew said.
“Hey! I don’t like the dark!” Xephos said poking Honeydew in the side.
“You don’t have to put three torches together on the ground!” Honeydew said laughing.
“Oh hush up.” Xephos said playfully shoving Honeydew. Honeydew laughed and looked back at the humans.
“We also have a few thousand fans who named themselves something close to our name.” Honeydew said.
“That sounds.... Freakishly similar to what we do.” Lewis said looking to Simon with a serious expression.
“It does.” Simon said, nodding.
“I think you mean Yognaughts Honeydew.” Xephos chuckled out.
“Yes, I meant that.” Honeydew nodded, “What do you guys do?” He asked, looking at the Lewis.
“Okay now that is just scary.” Duncan mumbled.
“We uh... Practically do the same thing. Only we record our shows and post them on this thing called Youtube.” Lewis said chuckling.
“Huh, that’s pretty cool... We usually just record the stuff onto a projector’s film then give it away to those who come to our live actions.” Xephos said scratching his head. “Projectors are pretty common back home.”
“Ya, and ponies outside Sirrup can get them so they can watch as well.” Honeydew said smiling.
“Pretty nice deal if I say so.” Xephos said happily.
“That does sound good, should we get the bag to bring them home now?” Simon asked.
“Sure, just gimme a minute, I have to go get it from my office.” Duncan said leaving the room.
“So...who else are your friends?” Simon asked, looking at the two ponies.
“Well... There is Lalna, he is one of our closer friends. Then there is my marefriend Lomadia. Sjin and Sips are two of our friends. There is also. Littlewood, Rythian, and Zoey.” Xephos said smiling before frowning and sighing sadly. “We... Used to have a couple of friends that were twins, but they... They died.” Xephos lowered his head and sighed. “Their names where Knight Peculiar and Old Peculiar since one looked older than the other. Plus he ran an old shop in this quaint little town before we met him and his brother.” Honeydew looked at Xephos and walked over to him, before nuzzling him to comfort him.
“Oh... Sorry about that then.” Lewis said sympathetically, before looking at Simon with a meaningful expression, which he returned.
“It’s ok, they died saving us.” Honeydew said sadly as he stopped nuzzling Xephos.
“Yeah I know, but why in Equestria would you not finish a rail track in a mining facility? That’s just silly!” Xephos said throwing his hooves in the air.
“Probably not enough bits or they didn't care.” Honeydew sighed. Duncan came back with a large duffel bag with the (Human version) Yogscast logo on it.
“Alright, I am going to need you two to hop into this.” Duncan said unzipping it and setting it on the ground. Honeydew shrugged and walked over to it before jumping into it and sitting down. Xephos looked skeptical for a moment before sighing and walking over. He looked inside and snorted for a moment before picking Honeydew up and getting inside and placing Honeydew on his belly.
“There. Now we can fit.” He said nodding in confirmation.
“Sooo... Do we just zip it up or what?” Simon asked scratching his beard.
“Well yeah. But the question is how are they going to breath?” Duncan asked as he looked down at the ponies laying in the bag.
“Zip it up halfway.” Lewis suggested.
“That could work, but someone is going to have to walk along the side so no one peeks in. Don’t want questions about why we are carrying around life sized ponies in a duffel bag.” Duncan said zipping the bag up enough so they could breath and they were mostly concealed.”
“I thought they were plushies when I first saw them.” Lewis said shrugging.
“Well to be fair, they were asleep.” Simon said.
“Yes, they were...” Lewis said.
“Just pick somepony who is the strongest!” Honeydew’s muffled voice said from inside the duffel bag.
“Quit kicking me.” Xephos said moving a bit.
“Sorry.” Honeydew said.
“It’s fine.” Xephos said sighing as Duncan rolled his eyes and with a small heave he pulled the bag up and put the strap around his neck.
“Jeez, you two are... Actually not as heavy as I thought.” He said shifting the bag.
“We wouldn't be.” Honeydew muttered.
“Oh Duncan, no need to be insulting.” Simon said.
“Whoops, sorry, didn’t mean it like that.” Duncan said sheepishly.
“It’s alright, Honeydew does need to lay off the cupcakes.” Xephos chuckled out.
“OI! You are the one that’s bigger than me.” Honeydew said.
“Yeah, but I didn’t consume a box of cupcakes everyday back home.” Xephos said snickering.
“Digging holes is hard, makes you hungry.” Honeydew said, moving a little in the bag.
“This is my kind of pony!” Simon said laughing.
“Lets just go to the car.” Lewis said, rubbing the bridge of his nose before walking out of the room.
“What’s a car?” Xephos asked as Duncan laughed as well and walked out of the office and headed down to the parking lot.
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Soon the trio was on their way to Lewis’s residence while the ponies sat in the back seat of the car with Duncan. The ponies were allowed out of the bag, to stretch and such, while they drove down the roads. While Duncan was busy dealing with the ponies, Simon and Lewis were discussing very peculiar (Teehee) things about the ponies.
“Sooo... Is it just me, or do these ponies act rather familiar?” Simon asked looking at Lewis.
“It’s not just you, they do the same things we do and have the same name for their fans as we do, and it doesn’t make sense to me.” Lewis said, watching the road.
“Well, that could all be coincidence, I am just worried about how we are going to handle duplicates of ourselves as ponies.” Simon said looking back to see Honeydew climbing on Duncan, slightly shouting the entire time, making him chuckle. “That is going to be a bit of a handful.”
“Don't you watch that show with Hannah when its on? They shouldn’t be real at all.” Lewis said.
“Hey, it was a good show!” Simon defended. “Not to mention those ponies are adorable.”
“I’m not saying it wasn't good, I'm saying that we shouldn't have pony duplicates and they shouldn't be real at all.” Lewis replied.
“Well... Ever heard of that Multiverse theory?” Simon asked raising a eyebrow. “It says that there are more dimensions that ours.”
“A universe based on a TV show isn’t possible Simon.” Lewis said, looking at Simon before quickly looking back at the road.
“But how do you know?” Simon retorted. “For all we know, Mass Effect is real somewhere out there! The reapers could be invading!”
“Would you like slender man to be real?” Lewis asked.
“Oh god no, but that doesn’t sate the fact that there are two living, breathing, My little Ponies sitting in the backseat of your car.” Simon said shuddering at the thought of a real life Slender.
“No it doesn’t.” Lewis agreed.
“I guess we should just try to get them home I guess? Although I am worried about one thing.” Simon said leaning back in his seat.
“That they will see the show?” Lewis asked.
“That, and Hannah.” Simon said putting a hand on his chin. “She loves adorable things more than me, and that is saying something. Imagine how she is going to react when she sees something adorable from a show she likes.”
“We will have to not let her see them than.” Lewis said shrugging.
“Keep two living, breathing, rowdy, and hilariously clumsy ponies out of her sight.” Simon deadpanned. “That is a brilliant plan, why don’t we just dump a bucket of lava in a wood house while we are at it.”
“Fine, if she does see them, then we will say they are plushies that our fans made, really realistic ones.” Lewis said, paying attention to the road.
“That you got.” Simon said deadpanning again.
“Yes.” Lewis said, “We also can't tell them about the show.”
“Alright, I guess that will work until we can figure something else out.” Simon said leaning back.
“Someone please help me!” Duncan laughed/pleaded from the back seat. “They are crawling on me like ants!”
“We are crawling on you like ponies!” Honeydew said laughing as he jumped off Duncan and onto the seat.
“Well stop it! It feels weird with your strangely soft hooves!” Duncan chuckled. Honeydew looked confused and looked at his hooves before shrugging.
“Well why wouldn’t they feel soft? Ponies couldn’t get massages if they weren’t.” Xephos said shrugging as well.
“Ponies here don't have soft hooves.” Lewis said while he watched the road.
“Now that is weird.” Xephos said.
“Ya.” Honeydew agreed as he appeared next to Simon.
“OH GOD!” Simon shouted as he clutched his heart and nearly smacked Honeydew. He panted for a moment before gently bopping his nose. “Don’t do that!”
“Do what?” Honeydew asked confused.
“Scare me!” Simon said picking up Honeydew. “I mean look at you! You’re terrifying! With your hooves and ears and things!”
“What?” Honeydew asked confused as he tilted his head.
“Just try not to scare me again please.” Simon sighed out, putting Honeydew in his lap and leaning back in the car’s seat again. Xephos just chuckled at his little friend’s antics before looking at Duncan.
“Soooo.... Don’t have magic here huh?” He asked. Duncan shook his head.
“We have people who do a form of magic, but it’s really just the trick of the hand. Like, making a coin disappear or something like that.” Duncan said smiling.
“Oh... So no actual magic? Like making a rope become alive, or turning a apple into a orange?” Xephos asked making Duncan shake his head.
“Best thing we have to that is people who can train snakes to dance when they play a pipe or those optical illusions.” Duncan said.
“Huh. That sucks.” Xephos commented.
“I don’t see how you can do anything with snakes.” Honeydew said, looking back at Duncan.
“What do you mean?” Duncan asked. “It’s just a serpent moving to the rhythm of a pipe.”
“Well, ponies don’t exactly... Like snakes.” Xephos said shifting a little. “They terrify some ponies while some don’t mind as much.”
“Ooooh. Same thing here, but not a lot of people are deathly afraid of them.” Duncan said making Xephos nod.
“You still haven't told us how these things move.” Honeydew said, jumping over to the back seat and sitting down.
“Um, a combination of gas, electricity and a lot of engineering.” Duncan said chuckling. “Just think of it like a self pulling cart or sled.”
“A self pulling pony carriage?” Honeydew asked.
“Yeah sure.” Duncan said shrugging.
“Here we are, my house.” Lewis said as he stopped the car in the driveway.
“Hurray!” Simon said clapping his hands. “We still need to worry about Hannah.”
“I know, if Hannah sees you two can you act like plushies?” Lewis asked, looking at the ponies.
“Well I know Honeydew does that pretty well.” Xephos said snickering.
“No I don't.” Honeydew said.
“Says the pony that gets used as a plushie all the time back home.” Xephos said laughing.
“How do I get used as a plushie?” Honeydew asked confused.
“Lalna used to do it, I did it a few minutes ago, Sjin sometimes does it. I know Lomadia does it all the time.” Xephos said now in full blown laughter. “That is also how we found out how much of a heavy sleeper you are!”
“Thanks.” Honeydew said frowning.
“Oh come on, like being cuddled at night is such a bad thing.” Xephos said rolling his eyes and smiling widely.
“It is when you can't get out of your grip!” Honeydew said.
“Okay okay, I will tell Lomadia not to do it anymore whenever we get back okay?” Xephos said shaking his head.
“Ok.” Honeydew said.
“Alright, sooo... Just go limp and don’t say anything?” Xephos asked looking at the humans.
“Yes, thats the idea.” Lewis said nodding as he opened his door and got out along with Simon.
“Oookay... Sooo.” Xephos just walked over and flopped down onto the seat limp. “Doesn’t seem so hard.”
“It wouldn’t be hard.” Honeydew said. Duncan rolled his eyes and opened the car door before getting out and picking up the two ponies, Honeydew in his left arm like a puppy and Xephos over his shoulder like a rucksack.
“Okay, now it’s a bit difficult.” Xephos grunted.
“Ha!” Honeydew laughed.
“Just wait till Hannah sees you Honeydew.” Duncan chuckled.
“Why?” Honeydew asked as they got inside the house.
“Hannah, we are home!” Lewis yelled. Duncan just handed Honeydew to Lewis before holding Xephos like a big dog.
“Oh Celestia that is better.” Xephos whispered. A blond girl walked into the room and out of the kitchen before she smiled.
“Hi.” She said before noticing the limp Honeydew and Xephos in Duncan and Lewis’s arms.
“Incoming enemy d’aws.” Duncan whispered to Lewis.
“Where did you get those cute plushies?” Hannah asked as she took Honeydew from Lewis.
“Yognaughts sent them.” Lewis said as he watched her hold Honeydew.
“They're so cute! But he didn’t give him his hat.” Hannah said as she squeezed Honeydew in a hug, making him neigh silently and Xephos chuckle quietly.
“They said in the... Letter, that they didn’t have enough time to finish the hat.” Duncan said smiling.
“Oh, we still have the hat that Simon wore once.” Hannah said as she held Honeydew by the tail making him squeal quietly and his eyes start to water a little as she walked towards a room.
“Should we help him?” Simon asked snickering.
“Would you like to be held by your tail?” Lewis asked as Hannah came back with Honeydew and a felt hat in her hand before putting him down and putting the hat on his head.
“Well he does look like a dwarf pony now.” Duncan chuckled.
“They got your cutie mark wrong as well, I can sew a new one on it.” Hannah said as she left Honeydew lying on the floor and walked over to Xephos.
“Wait!” Simon shouted. “Ahem... I heh heh, Mean it’s not that big of a deal is it?”
“Not really, but I thought you wanted them to be accurate.” Hannah said shrugging.
“Well I think it’s a nice gesture that they gave them to us anyway, why not leave them the way they are? Would be a bit rude to stitch something else on.” Duncan said trying not to sound nervous or anything as Xephos tried his best not to tense up or panic.
“You’re right, I guess it doesn't need to be accurate.” Hannah said shrugging.
“Besides!” Simon began before picking Honeydew off the floor. “They are soft and furry! What more do you need?”
“Nothing I guess.” Hannah said. Simon put the hatted Honeydew back into her arms and smiled.
“Good, now enjoy his fuzziness while we find a nice place to put them.” Simon said.
“Alright.” Hannah said as she started to walk away, while Honeydew gave Simon a dirty look as he was taken away. Simon just chuckled and waved goodbye.
“Alright where are we going to put them?” Duncan asked looking to Lewis as Xephos relaxed.
“Anywhere but with Hannah by the look Honeydew gave Simon.” Lewis said.
“Well would you want to be cuddled to death by an alien species?” Duncan asked.
“Depends.” Lewis said.
“On?” Simon asked as Duncan put Xephos down to stretch a bit.
“On if they didn't think I was a plushie.” Lewis said.
“I see. But about the ponies. Are we ever going to tell her about them being real, or let her snuggle them to death?” Simon asked.
“That sounds terrifying.” Xephos commented.
“She won't snuggle them to death.” Lewis said.
“She’s doing it to Honeydew right now.” Duncan said chuckling.
“No I’m sure she isn't.” Lewis said.
“I would still be cautious until we tell her. IF we tell her.” Duncan said.
“Ok, I know, we will tell her later though.” Lewis said.
“I hope we do. I don’t want to see her freak out when one of them speaks.” Simon said.
“She won’t.” Lewis said as Hannah came back with Honeydew still wearing the hat as well as a few blue bows in his mane, and Xephos sighed before going limp again on the floor.
“Yeah she will dress them up and make them want to jump off a building.” Duncan said holding back laughter.
“Have you figured out where you’re going to put these?” Hannah asked as she gave Honeydew back to Lewis.
“We are going to leave them on the couch.” Lewis said thinking quickly. With that Duncan picked up Xephos and tossed him onto the couch making him bounce twice.
“Good a place as any I guess.” Hannah said shrugging as she walked back to her room. Duncan, Lewis, Honeydew, and Simon all let out a collective sigh as they relaxed and Xephos just layed on the couch.
“I hate you all.” Honeydew said as he jumped out of Lewis’s hands and used his back hoof to scratch the bows out of his mane.
“Oh it couldn’t have been that bad.” Duncan said.
“She pulled my tail again and almost ripped my mane out while trying to put on the bows, she is insane!” Honeydew yelled.
“Oi keep your voice down!” Simon said looking to Hannah’s room. “We will try to keep you out of sight, but until then you are just going to have to power through this.”
“I will.” Honeydew said, before walking over to the couch and jumping on it, before lying down and snorting.
“This is going to be a long stay.” Xephos said sighing as he closed his eyes.
“Yep.” Honeydew agreed as he closed his eyes as well.
“Well I have to head home guys, see ya later.” Duncan said walking outside before realizing something. “Uh guys, I am going to need a ride home.” Lewis rolled his eyes and walked with Duncan to the car before driving him home and coming back a few minutes later. Simon was just sitting down on the couch while petting Xephos and scratching Honeydew’s ears.
“What? I got bored.” Simon said shrugging.
“Nothing, its been a long day, lets just let them sleep and do the same.” Lewis advised, before walking to his room. Simon shrugged and got up before heading to his room for the night.
Chapter 2: The Pony Games!
Of Ponies and Jaffas
By: Pen Brush and Slayerbrony
It was morning in the world now and Lewis and Simon went into the living room to see the two sleeping ponies still on the couch, still curled up against each other. Simon leaned against the doorway before sighing and shaking his head.
“Well I guess saying it was just a funky dream is out of the question.” Simon said, looking back at the small ponies.
“You would love it either way.” Lewis said.
“Yeah, but still.” Simon said smiling. “Nice to know I’m not crazy.”
“You're still crazy.” Lewis said chuckling.
“How rude.” Simon said sticking his nose in the air in mock disgust.
“Do you want to wake them up?” Lewis asked.
“Naw, let them sleep.” Simon said waving a hand dismissively. “They probably need it more than we do anyhow.”
“Probably. Lets get going.” Lewis said, walking toward the door. Simon just nodded and walked out with Lewis, stealing one last glance at the ponies.
______________________________________________________________________________
Honeydew and Xephos woke up ten or so minutes later and stretched like cats before shaking themselves awake. Xephos shook his head before rubbing his eyes a bit and yawning.
“Ugh, this couch is soft, but leaves the worst crick in my neck.” Xephos said twisting his head from side to side.
“Maybe it would help if you didn't sleep so weird.” Honeydew said laughing. Xephos just chuckled and sighed before a loud ‘SNAP’ was heard and he almost turned to jelly.
“Oh that is much better.” He said stretching one more time before hopping off the couch.
“I bet.” Honeydew said before jumping off the couch as well. Xephos looked around the room before he shrugged and began to walk towards the hallway.
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Honeydew asked, a little worried as he walked after his friend.
“Probably not. But we might as well look around.” Xephos said as he looked down the hallway on both sides before he walked out and began to explore. Honeydew paused for a second before following him. Xephos just kept walking around, making sure to keep his hooves quiet as he crept around. “Hmmm. I wonder where Simon and Lewis are. I am starting to get kinda peckish.”
“They probably went back to that place we appeared in before they brought us here, what I’m worried about is Hannah.” Honeydew said.
“Yeah that too. Shall we try to find a fridge?” Xephos asked as he peeked around the corner and walked around it.
“Maybe its in the kitchen.” Honeydew suggested.
“Well of course, but that begs the question of ‘Where is this kitchen?’” Xephos said tapping his chin.
“The room with the table and chairs.” Honeydew said, pointing a hoof behind them, they had passed the kitchen and were in the hallway with the bedrooms.
“Oh... right.” Xephos said facehoofing. They turned around and walked into the kitchen before heading to the large white fridge and opening it up. “That... Is a lot of Jaffas.”
“Yes.” Honeydew said nodding. Pushing aside the boxes, Xephos pulls out a few carrots and floated a few over to Honeydew before chewing on one himself.
“These aren’t as good as the ones we have at home.” Honeydew stated as he bit into one.
“Maybe, but at least it’s not chocolate covered cakes and milk.” Xephos said shrugging.
“I kinda liked the cakes.” Honeydew said.
“Well yeah, but I am not going to eat them everyday of my life, even if we can!” Xephos said chuckling and finishing off his carrot before turning back to the fridge and pulling out a jug of milk. “Want some?”
“Sure.” Honeydew said. Xephos pulled two cups out of a cabinet and filled the glasses before putting the milk jug back and sipping on his glass as one floated over to Honeydew. Honeydew grabbed it and drank from it as he ate his carrots. One of the bedroom doors opened as Xephos was cleaning up the mess they had made. He blinked and hurriedly put the dishes in the sink and put everything away before he leaned against the fridge and went limp, grunting a bit as he hit his head on the fridge door. Honeydew laughed a little before going limp as well and lying on the floor as Hannah walked into the kitchen.
She walked over to the fridge and accidentally stepped on Honeydew, making him wince before she took her foot off him and looked at the floor to see them, “Why did they leave these plushies on the floor?” Hannah wondered sleepily as she picked them up by their necks and walked to the living room and put them on the couch before going back into the kitchen to eat.
“Ow....” Xephos whispered rubbing his neck slightly.
“At least she didn’t step on you.” Honeydew grumbled, rubbing his side.
“I really hope they tell her soon.” Xephos whined as he laid there.
“Me too.” Honeydew said. Xephos just continued to lay on the couch and decided he would just go back to sleep.
“Ugh we need to talk to Lewis and Simon when they get back.” Xephos said sighing.
“Why do I still have this hat on my head?” Honeydew wondered as he looked up at the felt hat.
“It...kinda is yes.” Honeydew said.
Hannah came into the living room a few minutes later with a camera and put it down on a table before walking over to the couch and picking Xephos up by his horn and moving him to make him sit, then picking Honeydew up like a puppy and doing the same with him before taking a picture of them sitting together, before walking back to the kitchen and uploading the picture onto facebook with the computer in their to say thanks to the anonymous yognaught.
She got off the computer and quickly left the house to get to work.
______________________________________________________________________________
“Okay so we are alone now.... What do we do?” Xephos asked stretching a bit as he rubbed his horn.
“Did you break it?” Xephos deadpanned.
“How would I know if I broke something?” Honeydew asked.
“I dunno, maybe it’s just... Being silly.” Xephos said waving a hoof in the air. “Try pushing buttons or something. That usually works.”
“Ok...” Honeydew said as he looked for buttons before finding the controllers and picking one up with his mouth, “I can't read what these letters are!” He exclaimed, punching the buttons on the controller with his hooves. The screen changed to black before squares appeared with what looked to be games.
“Well you certainly did something. Whatever this is.” Xephos said. He picked up an odd shaped remote control before he pushed the green button with his hoof making the screen go back again. “Whoops.”
“Are they just putting gibberish for words here?” Honeydew wondered as he pushed the button on his controller again and brought it back to the squares.
“Maybe? We don’t know how they work. Maybe it’s like prench ponies.” Xephos said shrugging. “Or the Prussians. With all those backwards letters and such.”
“I’m just going to pick something.” Honeydew said, hitting the A button on the controller as it was hovering over the Skyrim option as the TV turned black again. It stayed that way for a few moments before a symbol that looked to be made out of stone appeared. It looked like a dragon trapped in a diamond along with four white lines of the strange text appeared again.
“It’s about dragons?” Honeydew wondered.
“Maybe. I dunno.” Xephos said shrugging. “Shall you pick the first option? That may do something.”
“Ok.” Honeydew said, moving the toggles with his hooves to hit the first option at the top, making the screen change with more of the words before slowly making the game start with the strange creatures tied up on a wagon.
“Are they going to be fed to the dragon?” Honeydew asked.
“How would I know? All I know is that they are in trouble for something.” Xephos said leaning back.
“Maybe we could turn it up? I don’t know.” Xephos said looking around.
“If you find a way to turn it up that would be great.” Honeydew said as he moved the view around wildly and looked at the front of the wagon, not listening to the other prisoners anymore, “What is pulling this wagon? A pony?”
“Uh... Maybe?” Xephos said as he picked up a small black rectangle. “This might do something.” He said as he clicked the thing and the sound went up to almost deafening noise.
“Little too loud!” Honeydew yelled and she put his hooves over his already hat covered ears.
“SORRY!” Xephos shouted and he poked another button making the volume go down to a normal level. “There.... Good gravy what is with all this stuff?”
“I don't know...the wagon stopped.” Honeydew said, not knowing what to do. After a few minutes the screen moved over to the person in armor holding a scroll and quill. After that a screen came up with the default character that Honeydew was playing as.
“What?” He asked, confused as he tilted his head as he stared up at the screen. Xephos just pushed a button on the remote and watched the human turn into a giant bipedal cat.
“I think I want the cat.” Honeydew said, clicking the cat. A white line popped up next to the cat as well as more text, “This is going to be all text based isnt it.” Honeydew grumbled as he hit random letters.
“I hope not.” Xephos said laying his chin on his hoof as he laid down and watched his little friend play the game.
A prisoner ran away and got shot by an arrow and fell dead, “Well...this doesn’t bode well to me.” Honeydew said nervously as the lady said he wasn't on some list.
“Well don’t try running then.” Xephos said chuckling.
“I can't move anyway.” Honeydew said, moving the toggles to try and move his character. The screen panned and showed him walking while a man was taken to the block.
“Come on! Let’s just get on with it!” The man shouted before the lady clad in armor nodded and the axe was brought down severing the mans head.
“... Ow.” Xephos said blinking.
“Oh my Celestia!” Honeydew yelled, terrified as his character moved on its own to the beheading block.
“So this is the game? You make a character to be beheaded?” Xephos said putting a hoof over his mouth.
“I guess, but what was the dragon about?” Honeydew muttered, watching as the guy brought the axe up. There was a deafening roar before a large dragon filled the screen. In a manner of seconds the dragon roared and spewed fire out of it’s maw.
“Well then! That escalated quickly!” Xephos shouted, beginning to smile. “This has gotten interesting!”
“At least this isn't just about making a character and dying, the dragon is friendly!” Honeydew said as he stood in one place, watching the dragon. The dragon looked at Honeydew’s character before setting the group of guards behind him on fire. Along with the guard before with the scroll helped him up while ushering him to the tower, “Maybe not so friendly.” he said as he followed the guard, only to have to choose between the guard and one of the other prisoners.
“Who do I go with?” He asked as he looked between the two people as the dragon continued to carnage the village.
“Eh... Go with the guy in the red. The imperial guy saved you before the dragon chomped you.” Xephos said pointing to the red guard.
“He was going to let the guy with the axe kill me.” Honeydew pointed out.
“But he did save you. The other guy just wimped out and ran like a little bit-” Xephos began to say.
“I’m going with the guy who ran away, smarter than the guard.” Honeydew said, running after the other prisoner.
“Okay then.” Xephos said shrugging. Honeydew moved his character to run after the prisoner. They ran into the building and after a few minutes of chatter, and looting corpses of several dead people, Honeydew was running out into the wilderness with the weird prisoner.
“How is this about the dragon?” Honeydew asked as the prisoner left him alone.
“I dunno. Maybe you are supposed to befriend it?” Xephos said tilting his head. “Or maybe you are supposed to like.... Actually I have no clue.”
“The guy said something about a dragonborn before leaving, is he saying somepony was born from a dragon?” Honeydew asked.
“How does that work?” Xephos said scratching his head. “I mean... I don’t think one of those guys has enough... Well you know what I mean. To impregnate a dragon.”
“What other way would it mean then, that the dragon impregnated a female?” Honeydew asked as he started walking down the path.
“I don’t know. Maybe it’s magic.” Xephos said scratching his chin.
“Alright.” Honeydew said, moving his character to walk off the path into the trees.
______________________________________________________________________________
“There chasing me!” Honeydew yelled, backing away from the three armoured men walked towards him, “I only killed a chicken on accident!”
“You shouldn't have killed it in the first place!” Xephos laughed.
“I didn’t try!” Honeydew yelled, backing up against a house.
“Yeah, you just swung an axe at it’s head is all!” Xephos cackled as he fell to the ground laughing.
“I didn't know I had an axe!” Honeydew said, running away from the guards as they followed after him. Xephos just kept laughing as Honeydew ran from the guards shouting a few insults and otherwise just being a complete idiot as he ran. He started jumping on the controller and pressing random buttons to go faster, accidentally bringing up the map.
“How do I get out of this?!” Honeydew said, looking down at the controller.
“Um... Try pressing this button.” Xephos said pushing a glowing green ‘X’ making another menu pop up. “Gah! I give up.”
“I’m just going to do...this!” Honeydew yelled, pressing the B button and getting out of both things just as the guards caught up to him, “Buck!” He said as he searched quickly through his weapons and took out a sword, before he slashed each of the guards until their life bars dropped and they simply fell to the ground.
“I guess that is one way to escape the law.” Xephos said hopping onto the couch.
“They had a note, I don’t know if guards have notes to kill somepony who didn't do anything.” Honeydew said, looking at the note even though he couldn't read it.
“Maybe it’s because you escaped a dragon demolished town?” Xephos said. “Maybe that is illegal or something.”
“Illegal to run from a dragon trying to kill everypony?” Honeydew asked, looking at Xephos.
“Maybe?” Xephos said shrugging.
“That doesn't make sense!” Honeydew said turning back to look at the note.
“Does us being brought here randomly make any sense?” Xephos asked leaning down and poking Honeydew in his side making him jump slightly. “And still ticklish I see.”
“I’m not.” Honeydew said frowning as he left the note and started walking again. Xephos just rolled his eyes and watched Honeydew play the game. After a good hour or so Lewis and Simon came home along with Duncan, since he drove his own car this time, and they walked through the front door as Honeydew was getting attacked by a dragon.
“Watch out watch out! He is breathing his fire!” Xephos panicked as he pointed at the screen.
“I see that!” Honeydew yelled as he blocked with a shield he had taken from a body.
“Use the shouty thing! Push his face back!” Xephos said shaking Honeydew a bit.
“I don’t know the button!” Honeydew shouted. Xephos just picked up Honeydew and used his magic to make the remote use the shout before watching the dragon wince at the force of the shout.
“Now now! Kill it kill it!” Xephos said shaking Honeydew again.
“Stop shaking me and maybe I will be able to!” Honeydew yelled. Xephos just smiled sheepishly and put him back down before watching the dragon die and dissolve into a pile of bones and it’s soul get absorbed.
“That is still creepy.” Xephos said shuddering.
“So...I’m dragonborn?” Honeydew wondered.
“I think so?” Xephos said scratching his head.
“This still doing make sense.” Honeydew muttered.
“You just killed a dragon by shouting and slamming it’s face with a club. Is it supposed to make anymore sense?” Xephos asked not noticing the confused humans in the doorway.
“I don’t know!” Honeydew said putting his front hooves in the air.
“Then why question it?” Xephos said shrugging before seeing Lewis, Simon, and Duncan. “Oh hi guys!”
“Uhh, hi.” Simon said before giggling at the ponies silly reactions to the video game. “And you were worried they were going to break something, Lewis.”
“They probably did.” Lewis said.
“I did nothing of the sort!” Xephos said in a mock hurt tone. “Honeydew ate your jaffas though.”
“Well that may be because you can’t read our writing?” Duncan said more questioningly than answering as Xephos firmly, but lightly, tapped Honeydew on the head.
“Told you!” He said triumphantly.
“You didn’t tell me anything!” Honeydew yelled, jumping onto the couch.
“I was still right.” Xephos said smugly. “Whether you heard me or not.”
“You’re right about nothing.” Honeydew said.
“Oh you are just being difficult.” Xephos said patting him on the head.
“You didn't help me very much during the game.” Honeydew accused.
“Yeah but you were playing. Besides I helped you kill the dragon!” Xephos defended.
“After you almost killed me.” Honeydew replied.
“No!” Xephos said like he was a child.
“Yes!” Honeydew said back, equally childish.
“No, I didn’t you big liar!” Xephos said playfully pushing Honeydew while smiling.
“Yes you did.” Honeydew said, smiling as well.
“Oh you are just making things up you crazy little bugger.” Xephos said sideways hugging Honeydew and giving him a noogie through the felt hat.
“You were playing this all day?” Lewis asked.
“Pretty much. Well, Hannah took pictures of us them put them on the that weird machine, but other than that yeah.” Xephos said.
“She pulled your horn as well.” Honeydew said, laughing as he got out of Xephos’ grip.
“The computer?” Lewis asked worried, looking at Simon and Duncan before walking over to the computer and typing quickly on it.
“Yeah that thing, that hurt you know! These things are sensitive.” Xephos said rubbing his head. “I still got a headache from that too.”
“That’s why its always so easy to cancel your magic whenever I want to.” Honeydew said smiling.
“I will push you out a window.” Xephos grumbled as he continued to rub his head.
“That won’t hurt, it never does.” Honeydew said.
“Yeah but it’s still annoying. I mean, me picking you up by the scruff of your neck is one thing, but stopping my magic is totally different.” Xephos said waving a hoof to emphasise his point.
“Hey Duncan?” Simon asked looking to his friend, both of them still in the doorway.
“Yeah?” Duncan replied as he watched the two small ponies bicker.
“How do you think the others are going to react to this? I mean we can’t keep them hidden from everyone.” Simon said.
“We have done it so far.” Lewis said, coming back from the computer, “I deleted the picture.”
“Well yeah, but Simon does have a point. I mean, if you think about it, the more people that know, the more people that can help us take care of them. I know Sjin will freak out over real ponies and be more than willing to help.” Duncan said scratching his chin. Xephos’ ears perked up and he looked towards Simon, Lewis and Duncan.
“Sjin is here too!??” He said excitedly.
“Um... Oh! No, we mean our friend Paul, his Username is Sjin.” Duncan explained as Xephos’ ears lowered and he hung his head.
“Oh...” He said in a slightly depressed manner.
“Why do you have our names?” Honeydew asked confused.
“Freaky coincidence?” Simon asked shrugging with a unsure expression.
“Ok.” Honeydew said shrugging.
“He would believe that...” Lewis muttered, rubbing his nose exasperated.
“Yes, yes he would.” Xephos sighed out.
“So Sjin would probably freak out, but what about Sips?” Lewis asked.
“Let me guess.” Xephos began rolling his eyes.
“His name is Chris and his username is Sips.” Simon said in sync with Xephos at the end.
“I bloody knew it.” Xephos said in mock triumph.
“Um, my guess is he would probably do one of his signature ‘What the fuck is this shit?’ lines and then go on this long tirade of what they are and how they came to be.” Duncan said chuckling. “All in all, I think he might accept it a bit easier than most.”
“Still, we are not telling anyone else.” Lewis said firmly.
“Okay okay, but if they see them...” Duncan began.
“I will say hi!” Honeydew said, appearing on Duncan’s shoulder.
“And they will probably scream and run away.” Duncan chuckled, scratching Honeydew’s head.
“Scream because of teleportation magic?” Honeydew asked, looking at Xephos.
“Well that, and the fact that you are a small pony wearing a felt hat and talking.” Duncan said.
“That’s normal.” Honeydew said.
“For you maybe. Humans around here don’t see too many of you guys.” Duncan said walking over and sitting on the couch as Simon walked over and sat down in the chair next to the couch. Honeydew got off Duncan’s shoulder and sat back down next to Xephos on the couch.
“So other than playing video games and being manhandled by Hannah, what else did you two do?” Simon asked leaning back.
“Nothing.” Honeydew said as Lewis sighed as he walked over and sat on the couch as well.
“Well... We did explore a little bit.” Xephos pointed out.
“Not much.” Honeydew said, nudging Xephos with a hoof.
“But we did explore. Unlike all those caves you kept freaking out about.” Xephos said rolling his eyes.
“You wasted the torches, I didn't want to go into pitch black caves.” Honeydew said.
“We always could have made more!” Xephos said. “But you wasted all the sticks on making all those shovels and picks!”
“So we could mine, and you just rhymed!” Honeydew said laughing.
“Oh hush up you!” Xephos said playfully pushing Honeydew.
“No you!” Honeydew laughed, pushing Xephos back. They started a small tumble of Honeydew and Xephos as the humans could only watch and laugh at the rather adorable and humorous fight. Soon it ended with both of them heaving on the ground and Honeydew laying across Xephos’ belly as they both panted for more oxygen.
“Why... Do we... Always... Do that?” Xephos panted and chuckled out.
“Because you started it.” Honeydew said, getting up.
“No you...” Xephos tiredly said as he rolled back onto all fours.
“You try and fight an earth pony, you won't get what you wanted.” Honeydew said, shaking himself.
“Oh shut up and let me get my breath back.” Xephos chuckled out as he stretched out.
“Well that was interesting to watch.” Simon said, barely containing his laughter.
“Yeah, they sure have a way of working out their arguments.” Duncan said, suppressing his laughter.
“At least they didn't break anything.” Lewis said, sitting back on the couch.
“You are always so pessimistic Lewis!” Simon said starting to laugh.
“No I’m not.” Lewis said.
“You kinda are.” Duncan said laughing with Simon.
“Shut up.” Lewis said.
“Oooh, come now Lewis, that’s not very nice.” Simon said giggling.
“Whatever.” Lewis said.
“Oh when did you become a stick in the mud? Lighten up a little! It’s not everyday adorable ponies are put into our lives.” Duncan said smiling.
“Adorable ponies that have the power to destroy things with magic.” Lewis pointed out.
“Oh like I would purposely blow something up.” Xephos said dismissively waving his hoof. “Pfft, get over yourself.”
“You have blown stuff up on purpose before.” Honeydew said, smiling.
“Yeah, but that was because you kept saying ‘Use the TNT, use the TNT!’.” Xephos said hopping a little in place to impersonate Honeydew.
“Besides that.” Honeydew said.
“Okay, once.” Xephos said as Honeydew just stared at him. “Okay twice.....” Honeydew didn’t let up. “Okay I did it several times, but that was just because it’s fun making big holes with just a small block of TNT!... And once by nothing but magic, but in my defense you scared me.”
“How did I scare you? You knew I was behind you!” Honeydew said laughing.
“When you are in a dark cave and you see something behind you smiling with a sharp tool in it’s hoof, you are going to freak out a little bit regardless of who you are with.” Xephos defended crossing his hooves.
“The monsters didn’t have sharp tools.” Honeydew said.
“Well maybe not then, but that doesn’t sate the fact, you scared me, so Nyah.” Xepho said sticking his tongue out at Honeydew again.
“You scare easily.” Honeydew said, getting a mischievous smile.
“Only when I am in dark caves.” Xephos said uncrossing his hooves.
“Spider.” Honeydew said, pointing a hoof at Xephos’s head.
“We aren’t in the simulation.” Xephos said.
“Normal spider featherbrain.” Honeydew said. Xephos looked up and saw a small little black spider. He blinked for a moment before beginning to flail about.
“Get it off, get it off!” He began shouting as he fell backwards. “It’s going to suck my blood!” Honeydew laughed and fell onto his back.
“It’s not funny! I have arachnophobia!” Xephos shouted as he finally got the spider off and blasted it leaving a small scorch mark where the spider once was. He panted for a moment before glaring at Honeydew. “You are a jerk.”
“Thanks for the scorch mark.” Lewis muttered.
“You are scared of nothing.” Honeydew said, sitting back up.
“I am terrified of spiders! You know that!” Xephos said sitting on his haunches and crossing his forelegs, slightly pouting.
“Well, at least we know to clear the place out of spiders later.” Duncan said looking at the black spot on the floor.
“A bit of an overreaction don't you think?” Simon asked looking at Xephos.
“No! Spiders are evil little monsters and deserve to die in the woods!” Xephos snapped, being rather agitated.
“That is snakes.” Honeydew said.
“Those too, but spiders can die with them.” Xephos said.
“Spiders take care of the bugs.” Honeydew pointed out.
“They are still evil.” Xephos said not budging from his fear of spiders.
“Dear god they are smaller than you.” Lewis said.
“Did you know that the smallest spider in the world can literally kill a two hundred pound pony with a single bite?” Xephos asked.
“Yes, and it's easy to kill them.” Lewis said.
“But if they bite you.” Xephos said pointing a hoof. “Then it’s game over. I just don’t like them okay!”
“Alright, calm down.” Lewis said, picking Xephos up as Honeydew jumped onto the couch.
“Fine, I’ll calm down.” Xephos said rolling his eyes and huffing a bit. Lewis rolled his eyes and started to rub Xephos behind the ear. The pony calmed down considerably and began to pur slightly as his hind leg kicked a little bit.
“Well at least we know how to relax them when they get worked up.” Duncan said chuckling.
“They are like bloody dogs.” Lewis said.
“Hey! I am maroon! And a pony!” Xephos said looking up at Lewis.
“I see that.” Lewis said.
“Then why did you say ‘bloody dog’?” Xephos asked tilting his head.
“Its an expression!” Lewis said.
“Half right.” Honeydew muttered, folding his ears back.
“What's that?” Simon asked looking at Honeydew.
“I don't know...we have blood.” Honeydew said, looking back at Simon.
“Um... Okay.” Simon said unsurely and scratched his beard.
“So expressions and pony’s liking ear scratches and belly rubs, what do we do now?” Duncan asked leaning back in his seat.
“Find a way to keep anyone else from knowing about them.” Lewis said, indicating the ponies with his head.
“Well we just have to make sure they don’t go outside or make too loud of a ruckus when they are left here alone. Shouldn’t be too hard.” Simon said shrugging.
“Shouldn’t be too hard with a pony whose talent is digging?” Lewis asked, looking at Honeydew.
“What?” Honeydew asked, confused.
“Get him a sandbox!” Simon said laughing. “And a little plastic shovel!”
“I don't like sand.” Honeydew said.
“Well we can figure that out later.” Duncan said.
“I could always practice my simulations. It would keep my talent sharp and keep Honeydew happy with digging.” Xephos suggested.
“I think we can trust them outside, they won't go anywhere anyway.” Lewis said, taking his hand away from Xephos’ head. Xephos whined a little bit before snorting and jumping onto the couch and curling up before laying his head down.
“What if somepony sees us?” Xephos asked.
“You could always bark.” Duncan joked. Honeydew looked at Duncan and barked, doing a realistic impression of a dog’s bark. “Yeah, just like that! No one will know the difference, dogs are all sorts of colors nowadays.”
“That shouldn’t be normal for a pony to do that...” Lewis said.
“Lewis, does a normal pony incinerate a spider with a small laser?” Simon asked.
“No.” Lewis said.
“Then why question it?” Simon said smiling. “Just go with it, and everything will be fine.”
“Fine.” Lewis sighed.
“Well, I guess we have a plan. And if you don’t mind.” Xephos said shifting himself a bit and laying his head down while closing his eyes. “I am going to take a nap. With all the spiders, roughhousing, and discussing of future plans, I am tuckered out.”
“Alright.” Lewis said, standing up. Duncan just shrugged and said his goodbyes before heading out and driving off. Simon just yawned himself seeing the sleepy ponies made him tired himself and he said goodnight to Lewis and went to his room.
“Night Lewis, sorry about burning your floor.” Xephos mumbled out as he drifted off into sleep.
“It’s fine.” Lewis sighed as he went to his room.
______________________________________________________________________________
Hannah came home a few hours later, seeing everyone else had already went to sleep and, being too tired, decided to sleep on the couch with the ponies, not even bothering to get her pajamas on.
Chapter 3: Video Games and Confessions.
Of Ponies and Jaffas
By: Pen Brush and Slayerbrony
Early in the morning, a single alarm went off from the phone of Hannah signalling her time to awake. She groggily opened her eyes and pulled out her phone from her pants’ pocket to see the alarm for her to get to work early to meet with Nilesy. She sat up on the couch and stood up, before picking up the Honeydew plushie and taking him with her to her room.
She put him on her bed before taking her clothes off to put new clothes on, accidentally throwing her old clothing over the sleeping Honeydew. She picked up some of her clothing from the floor and put it on the pile as well, before picking up the clothing, as well as Honeydew, and bringing it to the washing machine, before putting it all in and turning it on, quickly leaving the house to meet up with Nilesy.
______________________________________________________________________________
Xephos woke up with a yawn and scratched his ear with his hind leg before he lazily opened his eyes to not see a Honeydew laying next to him. He blinked and hopped off the couch before trotting to the kitchen and seeing Lewis and Simon sitting at the table eating their breakfast.
“Um, has anypony seen Honeydew?” Xephos asked yawning and rubbing his eyes.
“I thought he was with you.” Lewis said, chewing his toast.
“No, I woke up and he was missing. Toast please?” Xephos said walking over and hopping into a chair. Lewis gave him a piece of toast as the washing machine beeped. “Thank you.”
“I got the wash this time I guess.” Simon said getting up and walking out of the kitchen. The washing machine kept beeping as Simon angrily yelled.
“I GOT YOU, YOU FUCKING MACHINE. CHRIST I AM COMING!” Simon opened the washing machine and took out some clothing, before seeing Honeydew curled up holding his tail looking terrified inside the washing machine. “Oh... Hey Lewis! I found Honeydew!”
“Where was he?” Lewis yelled back as Xephos ran into the room with Simon, looking for his friend. Xephos stopped as he looked at Honeydew before letting out a small giggle and picking up the poor pony with his magic and bringing him down to the ground.
“You okay little buddy?” Xephos said hugging his drenched and terrified friend.
“That thing is terrifying.” Honeydew said shivering as Lewis walked into the room.
“Oh.” Lewis said, looking at the shivering wet pony.
“I believe you. Why were you in there in the first place?” Xephos asked.
“I don't know! I was sleeping and I woke up spinning in there!” Honeydew explained. Xephos just shook his head and looked at Lewis.
“Got towels?” He asked.
“Yes.” Lewis said before leaving the room and coming back with a towel, before putting it on Honeydew and starting to dry him off. Lewis took the towel off after he thoroughly dried Honeydew off to show Honeydew with his fuzzy fur like a ball around him. Xephos just stifled a laugh as he looked at his furry friend.
“It isn't funny!” Honeydew said angrily. Xephos just burst into laughter and fell to the ground laughing.
“Whose clothing is in their Simon?” Lewis asked as he stood up.
“Uuh. Hannah’s.” Simon said looking inside.
“Great...” Lewis muttered.
“She almost killed me!” Honeydew yelled, shaking himself to make his fur go back to normal.
“Oh I doubt she did it on purpose.” Simon said.
“She might not have known, but I think it’s time we tell her, before she does accidentally kill one of them.” Lewis said, putting a hand on his chin in thought.
“That is terrifying.” Xephos said as he sat up.
“I know.” Lewis said.
“Well how are we going to tell her? Just let us walk up to her and say ‘HEY HANNAH WE ARE LIVING AND REAL!’.” Xephos impersonated a little louder than he probably should have.
“No, we aren't going to do that, that would scare her.” Lewis said.
“Are you going to bring her into a room separate from us and tell her before showing her to us so she doesn't kill us?” Honeydew asked dryly.
“That’ll work!” Simon said clapping his hands together.
“Better plan than none I guess.” Lewis said shrugging.
“So when she gets home, we do this?” Xephos asked.
“Yes.” Lewis confirmed.
“Great.” Honeydew said, standing up shakily to his hooves. Xephos just picked Honeydew up and put him on his back before walking out of the room and heading back to the kitchen.
“Well it gives us time to prepare.” Xephos said shrugging.
“Prepare what? To run for our lives?” Honeydew asked frowning.
“Well that, and we can get something nice to eat before she hugs us to death or something.” Xephos said.
“That sounds lovely! ” Honeydew said sarcastically.
“It’s a better death that some would think.” Xephos said shrugging again.
“You would know.” Honeydew said smiling as Simon and Lewis walked back into the kitchen and sat at the table.
“Yes I would.” He said as he put Honeydew on a chair and sat in one himself. Laughing as Honeydew’s head barely got above the table.
“Stop laughing.” Honeydew said frowning.
“Sorry, sorry.” Xephos said putting a hoof to his mouth to hopefully stop the giggles which it didn’t.
“Can’t wait to see Hannah hug you.” Honeydew muttered, getting up onto the table.
“Oh hush up.” Xephos said as he leaned back in his seat as the others took their seats around the table.
“It’s true.” Honeydew said smiling as Simon gave him some toast.
“Duncan should be here soon.” Lewis said looking at the clock.
“Well what should we do while we wait?” Simon asked.
“Do you have any other games on that box?” Honeydew asked as he finished his toast, pointing at the Xbox in the living room.
“Oh tons!” Simon said smiling.
“Like what?” Honeydew asked.
“Well we have Halo, Call of Duty, Skyrim, which is what you guys were playing by the way, Fallout three!” Simon continued to list.
“I want to see you play Skyrim Xephos.” Honeydew said, looking at his friend, “I already did.”
“Um... Okay.” Xephos said smiling. “Buuuut there is one problem.”
“What?” Honeydew asked.
“We can’t read anything.” Xephos said sheepishly.
“I did pretty well without reading anything.” Honeydew replied.
“We are going to have to teach you how to read soon I guess.” Lewis said.
“That would be lovely... So to the box thingy?” Xephos said smiling.
“Yep.” Honeydew said, jumping off the table and walking over to the living room as Simon and Lewis got up from the table. They walked in and sat on the couch with Xephos sitting next to Simon.
“Hey, Lewis! Come watch a pony play Skyrim! This should be fun!” Simon shouted as Xephos floated the remote up to him and looked at it.
“Okay... This might be a bit complicated.” Xephos said.
“I am right next to you, I walked in with you.” Lewis said, tapping Simon on the head.
“Press the green button.” Honeydew said, looking at the controller.
“Right.” Xephos said sticking his tongue out as he pressed the button and watched the T.V. turn on with the Xbox logo appearing. “Oh I did it!”
“Yay.” Honeydew said sarcastically, clapping his hooves together slowly as he rolled his eyes.
“OH hush up you.” Xephos said gently swatting the front of Honeydew’s nose. He pressed the other green button and watched the screen go black.
“Ha ha!” Honeydew laughed.
“Aw dang it.” Xephos whined before the dragon symbol came back on. “Oh yeah!”
“Now you have to make a character.” Honeydew said as the doorbell rang.
“Hello!” Duncan’s voice rang out from the doorway. “Hello? Where are you guys?”
“Living room.” Lewis replied. Duncan walked in and took a seat in the chair as he watched the screen.
“Is Xephos playing Skyrim.” Duncan more or less stated then asked.
“Yes.” Honeydew said smiling as he watched his friend.
“Ehm... I want the dragon guy.” Xephos said as he clicked on the character and slowly typed in the name ‘Xephos’ in, albeit it wasn't spelled correctly.
“That’s an Argonian, it’s like a lizard.” Lewis said.
“Ooooh...” Xephos said as the opening scene started. As the man got to the block and had his head lopped off, both Honeydew and Xephos flinched. “Eeew... That is still nasty and gruesome.”
“Do you still do that to others?” Honeydew asked, looking at Duncan.
“What beheading? No no no, that was disbanded long ago. Although some other countries still do it, it is extremely rare.” Duncan said.
“That’s terrible.” Honeydew said, turning to look at the game again.
“Well yeah, but don’t worry beheading is only for the worst of the worst.” Duncan said reassuringly. Xephos’ character began to run away and panic a little bit as the dragon broke the walls down and spewed fire everywhere.
“How about you follow the guard and see what happens.” Honeydew suggested.
“Sure, as soon as the dragon stops trying to eat me!” Xephos almost shouted as he continued to run until he followed the guard and ran inside. Xephos cheered a little when they got to the town and got some steel weapons and stuff. “Ha! I told you to follow the guard!”
“How would I know the guard would give somepony he tried to kill weapons!?” Honeydew shouted.
“I dunno! Why are you shouting!?” Xephos yelled back as his ears folded back.
“Dunno.” Honeydew said shrugging.
“I see.... Welp! Onward to victory!” Xephos cheered happily.
______________________________________________________________________________
“Ha ha! Taste my dragon shout you bloody bastard!” Xephos cheered as the dragon was pushed back allowing him to finally kill the dragon. The front door opens and Hannah walks in.
“I’m home everyone!” Hannah announced as Xephos stopped and slowly turned to Honeydew before slightly beginning to panic. He tossed the remote to Duncan and then flopped onto the couch as Honeydew just went limp on the couch. Hannah walked in to see Duncan playing a videogame while the two ponies were laying on the couch limply.
“Hey guys, what’s up?” She said.
“Oh nothing just Duncan said he could go through the whole Skyrim game never once using magic.” Simon said smiling.
“Oh.. That’s cool.” Hannah said happily.
“Can we talk to you in the kitchen?” Lewis asked getting up from the couch with Simon.
“Um, sure, is something wrong?” Hannah asked.
“No.” Lewis said walking into the kitchen with Hannah.
“Sure sounds like something is wrong.” Hannah mumbled as she followed. As they entered the kitchen they all settled down in the chairs.
“So what’s up that we had to leave Duncan all by his lonesome?” Hannah asked smiling.
“Well, you see Hannah... You know those adorable ponies that the Yognaught sent us?” Simon asked as Hannah nodded.
“Yeah, it was pretty sweet of them too.” She said.
“The thing is. Those weren’t sent by a Yognaught... Nor are they plushies.” Simon said gently as Hannah blinked.
“I don’t get it.” She said chuckling in a confused manner.
“Should we just call for them?” Simon asked looking at Lewis.
“Sure.” Lewis said shrugging.
“Alright, Honeydew! Xephos! Get in here!” Simon shouted to the living room.
“Do I have too!?” Honeydew yelled from the living room.
“Yes!” Simon shouted back chuckling.
“You guys are just pulling my leg right?” Hannah said a bit nervous now.
“She put me into a spinning pool of death, I don't want to come!” Honeydew yelled.
“Do I need to carry you in!?” Simon shouted back.
“Xephos would probably do that!” Honeydew said.
“Do you want him to do that or are you going to come willingly!?” Simon shouted back.
“What are they on about?” Hannah asked looking at Lewis.
“You put Honeydew into the washing machine.” Lewis said.
“I am not coming!” Honeydew yelled back.
“Right, XEPHOS!” Simon shouted.
“Got it!” Xephos shouted back before he came trotting into the kitchen with a flailing Honeydew in his magic. “Oh calm down!”
“I’m calm!” Honeydew yelled.
“Then stop flailing about!” Xephos said. “And maybe I will put you down!”
“Fine.” Honeydew said, as he calmed down and stopped moving.
“Good.” Xephos said nodding his head and he put Honeydew on the table while hopping into the chair behind Honeydew.
“That’s them.” Lewis said. Hannah simply stared at them before her jaw dropped. This remained until she shook her head.
“H-how?” She squeaked out.
“Xephos did it.” Honeydew said.
“Hey! It’s Lalna’s fault! He scared me!” Xephos defended.
“Wait how did Dunca-” Hannah began.
“Not Duncan.” Lewis said quickly.
“Besides, it’s not my fault that when I get scared I teleport! It’s like a flight or fight instinct! And mine is flight!” Xephos said crossing his hooves and pouting.
“This...is actually a better reaction than I thought she would get.” Lewis said, looking at Hannah. That was when Hannah let out all that had built up.
“OHMYGOSH OHMYGOSH! THEY ARE REAL LIFE PONIES!” Hannah squeed out before she turned to Honeydew. “Oh god, I am soooo sorry for putting you in the washing machine this morning I didn’t know you were real and then I was really tired and-” She barely even got a breath in before she simply fell backwards and passed out. Xephos blinked and looked over the table.
“Woah. Simon was right. You are terrifying.” Xephos said looking at Honeydew.
“I didn’t do anything!” Honeydew said, jumping off the table and running back to the living room in terror of Hannah waking up and attacking him.
“So.... This is it? She has a freakout and now we are okay?” Xephos asked looking at Lewis and Simon.
“I guess? She hasn’t done that before...ever.” Lewis said, looking at Hannah passed out on the floor.
“Well... Um, I will get her I guess.” Xephos said as he levitated Hannah off the floor and began walking back to the couch as Duncan was playing Skyrim as Honeydew watched him from the couch. He looked over and saw Hannah in the pale red glow before looking to the kitchen.
“I take it, it all went well?” Duncan called to the kitchen.
“She was terrifying.” Honeydew muttered. Xephos just rolled his eyes and put Hannah on the couch.
“She didn’t even do anything other than have a mini freak out.” Xephos said as he tucked her legs onto the couch and put her arms next to her. “Besides now that she knows we are not plushies, we can actually walk around now without worrying about her killing us with affection.”
“She can still do that now.” Honeydew said moving further on the couch away from Hannah.
“But you can tell her to stop, or not touch you now.” Xephos pointed out.
“Easy for you to do.” Honeydew said.
“What are you going to freak out and run every time you see her awake?” Xephos joked.
“Yes.” Honeydew said nodding. Xephos just looked at him with a deadpanned expression before sighing and rubbing the side of his head.
“You are so difficult sometimes.” Xephos muttered.
“She is insane.” Honeydew said.
“And the fact that we are sitting in the living room of an alien species isn’t?” Xephos asked.
“I stopped questioning unicorn magic.” Honeydew said, jumping off the couch.
“Then you should give Hannah a second chance, she didn’t know you were living when she threw you in the washing machine thingy.” Xephos said following his friend with his eyes.
“Fine.” Honeydew muttered, as he sat down next to Xephos.
“Good, I am sure she will appreciate it.” Xephos said giving Honeydew a hug with one of his hooves.
“You ponies are surprisingly forgiving.” Duncan commented looking at the ponies.
“How else would we be?” Honeydew asked, looking at Duncan, “We aren't going to be like those games where you die for doing nothing wrong.”
“Well, this is just humans, but we tend to hold a grudge against things like that. I know if Lewis put me in the washing machine, I would probably hold it against him.” Duncan said shrugging.
“You can fit in there?” Honeydew asked, tilting his head.
“Well no, but if he got a washing machine I COULD fit in, I would hold a grudge against that.” Duncan said chuckling.
“I wouldn’t put you in a washing machine.” Lewis said, walking into the living room with Simon.
“But if you did.” Duncan said pointing a finger at Lewis.
“I could see you putting Duncan in a washing machine, if like... You were really mad at him.” Simon said.
“That would kill him Simon.” Lewis said, “I wouldn’t kill him if I was mad at him.”
“Ok Honeydew was in that thing for who knows how long and he is fine.”
“I was in there for twenty minutes and I was curled up in a ball so I wouldn’t get hurt.” Honeydew said.
“Wait you counted?” Xephos asked looking down at him.
“I didn’t have anything else to do in there besides be terrified, wasn’t trying to count at all, and I lost the hat in there too.” Honeydew said, smiling.
“So you guessed?” Xephos asked.
“No.” Honeydew said, shaking his head.
“Then how did you know the exact time?” Xephos asked.
“I don't know...” Honeydew said confused.
“Then wh-... Nevermind, you are worse than that pink one from Ponyville when we visited.” Xephos said rubbing his head with both hooves.
“Pinkie? She threw us a party and is one of the elements, she was nice.” Honeydew said.
“And a royal pain for my mind.” Xephos said sighing. “You shouldn’t even be able to eat an entire cake in a single bite, let alone stomach it.”
“Maybe she was able to do that because she is a party pony? As well as not from Stirrup?” Honeydew suggested.
“Still shouldn’t be possible.” Xephos said. “If you look at the anatomy of a pony, it’s not physically possible.”
“Neither is magic.” Duncan pointed out.
“Here maybe, but I don’t think Honeydew could eat an entire cake and not throw half of it back up.” Xephos said patting Honeydew on the head.
“I could try.” Honeydew said smiling.
“I would rather not have to clean up vomit.” Lewis said.
“See? At least he is logical.” Xephos said.
“No, I just don't want to clean up vomit.” Lewis said.
“Still logical.” Xephos said pointing a hoof at Lewis. Then he looked at Hannah before looking at the humans. “Well... While she is sleeping, why don’t I show you guys what me and Honeydew did back home for a living!”
“That sounds interesting.” Duncan said smiling and pausing his game before putting the remote down.
“Sure.” Lewis said shrugging.
“Why not? Sounds like it could be fun.” Simon said happily. Xephos smiled before standing up and thinking for a moment.
“Do you have a... Larger and emptier space?” Xephos said sheepishly.
“Outside.” Lewis said, pointing to a back door in the kitchen.
“Alright then! Let’s go!” Xephos said putting Honeydew on his back with his magic and running to and out the door with the humans behind.
______________________________________________________________________________
Xephos was sitting in the grass concentrating as his horn glowed brightly. Duncan had taken to sitting in a chair and waiting while Simon was eating a few jaffas and sipping on some tea. Lewis was just standing and waiting to see what happened while Honeydew was just sitting on his haunches and waiting for Xephos to be done.
“Does it usually take this long?” Duncan asked looking at Honeydew.
“No, it usually takes him a few seconds, I don’t know why it’s taking so long.” Honeydew replied.
“Maybe he is out of practice?” Simon suggested.
“No, he wouldn’t be out of practice because using his magic makes it work, even if he hasn't used the specific spell.” Honeydew explained, looking at Simon.
“Huh... Maybe something is blocking it, like water trying to go through plastic.” Simon said shrugging.
“Nothing blocks magic.” Honeydew said.
“Besides other magic right?” Duncan asked.
“I don’t know.” Honeydew said shrugging, before turning back to watch Xephos.
“Alright. Wait it is doing something!” Duncan said excitedly. Xephos finally released the spell causing the world around them all to become that of blocks and cubes. Lewis, Simon, and Duncan all recognised it from their computers, but to see the game they played behind a screen come to life in front of them was... Magical!
“That was a bit of an ordeal.” Xephos said chuckling.
“Why was it taking longer for you to do that?” Honeydew asked as he looked around.
“I put a few more spells in so that anyone neighboring our hosts couldn't see us.” Xephos said smiling. “Invisibility is a bit harder than projection.”
“Alright.” Honeydew said. Xephos just chuckled before sighing and looking around the blocky world. He walked over to a tree and smacked it with one of his hind legs making the middle bit pop out.
“Dear Celestia, I missed doing this!” Xephos said smiling happily as he jumped around a bit.
“Me too.” Honeydew said, popping his head out from a giant hole he had made in the ground in a matter of seconds.
“H-how?” Duncan stuttered out as he looked around.
“Well... Magic!” Xephos said smiling as he began to build a small home. “Even unicorns don’t know the full extent of it.”
“I bet they wouldn't.” Lewis said, walking over to the half built house. Duncan began to look around, seeing the environment and feeling the world around him.
“This is amazing!” Simon said smiling widely in awe. “I never thought doing anything like this was possible without the help of technology!”
“Ya well it is with magic and...Oh uh...” Honeydew said, jumping out of the hole and looking out into the landscape. Xephos popped his head out from the structure before sighing and going to a small table inside the house. There was the sound of things being smashed together before a wood sword was thrown in front of Honeydew and Xephos came trotting out with one in his magic.
“Creepers?” Xephos moaned out looking where Honeydew was.
“Yes, and I hate how you made them able to hear us and chase after us.” Honeydew said, picking the sword up in his mouth.
“Hey, it was Lalna’s fault. He helped me with the spell.” Xephos said. “He said it would make things more interesting.”
“I guess, but he also helped you make them go in herds, so there are probably like, ten around, coming at us.” Honeydew said through the sword. Xephos rolled his eyes before looking around and looking down the hole Honeydew made.
“Honeydew?... Trap?” Xephos said smiling.
“Yes.” Honeydew said.
“What about us!?” Duncan said as he looked to the trees that were beginning to rustle.
“Go into the house?” Honeydew suggested.
“Right!” Simon said as he hurried into the building with Duncan following behind quickly while Lewis, being next to it already, got in.
“Alright so we can just lead them into the pit and then suffocate them in sand?” Xephos said as he looked around.
“We don’t have sand.” Honeydew reminded Xephos.
“Ah... We do have gravel though!” Xephos said as several blocks floated over to them.
“Ok, gravel works too.” Honeydew said before he sighed and his ears went back, “I’m going to have to bring them here aren't I?” He asked. Xephos just nodded as he began to build a scaffold he would drop the gravel from. Honeydew sighed before running towards the creeper and hitting it with the wooden sword before running back to the trap with the creeper behind him. The other creepers came out and went after him as well.
Honeydew ran over and as if he was trying to imitate an action hero, he jumped over the pit, seemingly in slow motion, as the creepers skidded to a stop and tumbled into one another all falling into the pit. Honeydew laughed happily as Xephos buried the creepers alive in the gravel only coming down when the last hiss was heard.
“Well... That was... Dramatic.” Xephos said hopping off his scaffold and breaking it down.
“I don’t like creepers.” Honeydew said as he walked over to it and got the gunpowder.
“Better than those enderponies. They are just annoying.” Xephos sighed out remembering the block stealing teleporters. That was when Simon, Lewis, and Duncan all came out in awe of the ponies.
“That was... AWESOME!” Duncan said throwing his arms in the air in the ‘Rocky’ stance.
“It was pretty damn cool!” Simon said smiling. “I mean, creepers are terrifying.”
“They aren't as bad as spiders or skeletons.” Honeydew said, throwing the gunpowder back on the ground.
“Or enderponies.” Xephos added.
“Those too.” Honeydew said.
“Can you stop this simulation now? I’m worried about Hannah, and dying here.” Lewis said, looking at Xephos.
“Well sure, but you can’t die in here, you just pass out.” Xephos said shrugging and letting his horn glow before the world around them looked like it was digitally dissolving before the world around them was back to normal. “There we go!”
“Thank you.” Lewis said, walking back into the house. Xephos just shrugged before walking into the house with him along with the others following in behind.
“Why is he stiff all the time?” Xephos muttered as he walked.
“Eh, he is just really serious all the time.” Simon said shrugging. “He isn’t always like this, but no offense, but it’s not everyday you have alien ponies living in your home.”
“He does have a point.” Duncan said chuckling.
“He seems fun to me!” Honeydew said smiling as they walked into the living room to see Lewis sitting with the now awake Hannah.
“Hello!” Xephos said waving as he walked into the room.
“Hi.” Hannah said back smiling.
“Hi...” Honeydew said, slowly walking backwards before bumping into Duncan.
“Hey now, she isn’t going to try and sew you a new rump picture.” Duncan chuckled picking Honeydew up.
“Cutie mark!” Honeydew said, trying to get out of Duncan’s hands.
“Calm down!” Duncan said holding the flailing Honeydew out and snickering at the sight of the panicking pony. “What are you so scared of any how?”
“Being hugged to death!” Honeydew said, quickly biting one of Duncan’s fingers, but too soft to actually do anything.
“Ow! You little bugger!” Duncan said tucking Honeydew under his arm and bopping him on the nose. “Don’t bite or I will toss you to her!”
“I’m not a lion, Duncan.” Hannah said rolling her eyes.
“Your a lioness.” Lewis said, hugging Hannah.
“Let me go!” Honeydew yelled, squirming under Duncan’s arm.
“Are you going to calm down?” Duncan said keeping his grip on Honeydew firm.
“You did say you would give her a second chance.” Xephos pointed out.
“I did, but she was sleeping.” Honeydew said.
“Doesn’t mean that you can skimp out on it. Now get you flank over there and say hello.” Xephos said sternly pointing to the couch.
“I can't.” Honeydew said.
“Right, Duncan you can put him down now.” Xephos said as Duncan nodded and put Honeydew down. “Good, now march mister.”
“Riiight.” Honeydew said rolling his eyes before walking over to the couch and jumping up onto it to sit next to Hannah. There was a awkward tension in the air as the two exchanged awkward glances. The silence was only broken by Xephos facehoofing.
“Um.. Sorry for putting you in the washing machine... And the bows in your hair. And the hat.” Hannah said looking away shamefully.
“I liked the hat.” Honeydew said, frowning thoughtfully.
“We will get the hat later.” Xephos said rolling his eyes.
“You didn’t know I was alive so I guess its ok.” Honeydew said, glaring at Xephos.
“You sure?” Hannah said looking back at him with sad eyes.
“Yes.” Honeydew said. Again there was some awkward tension in the air as silence once again fell.
“Good Celestia, it’s like dinner with my family.” Xephos muttered double facehoofing.
“No, nopony is glaring at me while holding a knife with their magic.” Honeydew said, remembering his friend’s dad.
“That was one time!” Xephos shouted as Duncan laughed out loud. “And I warned you they were old fashioned!”
“Your parents don’t like me!” Honeydew yelled.
“Because they are old fashion!... And you kinda... Ate my mother’s flower garden.” Xephos said snickering.
“I didn’t eat it! I dug it up accidentally!” Honeydew said.
“Still though, she would have understood better if you ate them.” Xephos said falling backwards laughing as Simon was cackling.
“Are they always like this?” Hannah asked looking at Lewis.
“Yes.” Lewis said smiling.
“Well I see that they are going to be just fine here.” Hannah said giggling as she looked at the flustered Honeydew and cackling pony and humans next to the doorway.
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Chapter 4: Video games, Ponies, and Coffee OH MY!
Of Ponies and Jaffas
By: Pen Brush and Slayerbrony
The next day the ponies woke up again, only not to being manhandled, and yawned and stretched as they saw Simon, Lewis, and, Hannah all in the kitchen talking and laughing. Xephos yawned again and got up before picking the sleepy Honeydew off the couch and onto his back as he tiredly trotted into the kitchen.
“Morning Xephos!” Simon said smiling and giggling.
“Morning.” Lewis said.
“Hello!” Hannah said cheerily.
“Morning.” Xephos mumbled yawning again as he shook his head to clear the waking up feeling he was experiencing.
“We need a bed...” Honeydew mumbled sleepily from Xephos’ back. Xephos only nodded as he jumped into a chair and put Honeydew on the table watching him slowly shift until he flopped onto his side.
“Well I see you two didn’t get much sleep.” Simon said sipping at a cup of tea.
“The couch isn’t the most comfortable place to sleep.” Lewis said.
“Still better than the floor. Plus Honeydew makes a good pillow sometimes.” Xephos said letting out a tired chuckle.
“I would rather have slept on the floor.” Honeydew said, sitting up.
“Oh please, you sleep on top of me instead of the couch sometimes.” Xephos said rolling his eyes.
“Your softer than the couch, the floor is softer than the couch.” Honeydew said, looking at Xephos.
“That is true and to be honest, I don’t mind all that much. Your pretty light. And warm. Like a living blanket.” Xephos said as he picked up a piece of toast and floated it over to him before he took a bite.
“Because I have fur, and I am alive, you’re like one too.” Honeydew said, taking some toast for himself.
“So you two just use each other like blankets and pillows?” Simon asked.
“I didn’t want to be used as a pillow.” Honeydew said.
“Sorry, I kicked mine off the couch in the middle of the night.” Xephos said sheepishly.
“Why didn’t you use magic to get it than?” Lewis asked.
“I was tired. And he was the closest thing that was soft.” Xephos said snickering.
“A bed would be nice.” Honeydew said as he chewed his toast.
“Well we do have a spare room, but it’s only got one bed if you two don’t mind sharing.” Simon said shrugging.
“Is it softer than the couch?” Honeydew asked.
“Much softer. Like lying on a massive plush pillow.” Simon said smiling.
“Or clouds?” Honeydew asked.
“The sheets are that soft.” Simon said shrugging. “Then again, I don’t know what a cloud feels like.”
“The room hasn't been used in a while, so we might have to get it cleaned.” Lewis said thinking.
“Ah it won’t take long.” Simon said waving a hand dismissively.
“Plus I can help out with a little bit of magic.” Xephos said smiling.
“That’s true.” Lewis said. Xephos nodded before his expression turned to one of mourning before he began to slowly, and somehow pitifully, eat the rest of his toast.
“Are you ok?” Honeydew asked, looking at his friend with concern. Xephos sighed a little and nodded.
“I am fine. Just uh... Thinking of Lomadia.” Xephos said laying his head on the table.
“We will get home, you will see her again.” Honeydew said as he finished his food and jumped off the table.
“Who’s Lomadia?” Hannah asked, curious about hearing her username.
“She’s my marefriend back home.” Xephos said glumly. “I would like to think she isn't freaking out, but I never know.”
“Let’s... show you the room.” Lewis said awkwardly as he and Simon had already finished eating.
“Okay.” Xephos said getting off the table and walking over to Honeydew. “Do you think they know we are gone?”
“If Lalna told them, then yes.” Honeydew said, following Lewis.
______________________________________________________________________________Back in Equestria )
“Lalna, what are you doing outside?” A purple unicorn with an owl cutie mark asked curiously as she looked outside the door of the house.
“Lomadia! Xephos!... Honeydew!” Lalna wheezed out as he panted. “Gone!”
“Uhhh...ok?” Lomadia said, confused and a little worried about her friend.
“Spell! Scared!.... Zap!” Lalna said falling to the ground and panting a bit more.
“You’re not making any sense!” Lomadia yelled, walking outside and over to Lalna. He panted a bit more before clearing his throat and standing up with a bit more energy in his body.
“Xephos and Honeydew were testing this weird spell thing and I walked over and said hi! Then Xephos jumped and his horn went ‘ZAP’ and then all was left is a small scorch mark!” Lalna shouted in one large breath.
“So you teleported in front of him said hi and scared him into teleporting away, you know he teleports when he gets scared.” Lomadia said, facehoofing.
“Yeah, but that is usually to his house! Not in a flash of lightening!” Lalna said fidgeting worriedly.
“Maybe he teleported somewhere else, we can go ask everypony else.” Lomadia suggested.
“Maybe! But I have asked Sjin, Sips, and even Rythian! And he shot me in the flank with a magic beam!” Lalna shouted looking back at the scorch mark on his flank.
“Why did he do that?” Lomadia asked.
“Oh this big war thing, it’s not important!” Lalna said grabbing Lomadia and looking at her until all either of them could see was each other’s eyes. “XEPHOS AND HONEYDEW ARE SOMEWHERE THAT PROBABLY ISN’T EQUESTRIA!” Lomadia blinked and gentle made Lalna’s hold on her go away before speaking.
“Have you talked to Israphel yet? He doesn't talk much sure, but he could help you.” Lomadia suggested.
“But that stallion gives me the willies!” Lalan whined.
“He isn’t bad, he is just quiet because while we play the simulation, the ponies have thought him to be the bad pony, it isn’t his fault that he is who he is.” Lomadia scolded.
“Sorry, but a winged unicorn with glowing red eyes is still hard to look at and not get slightly scared.” Lalna said rubbing his foreleg with the other hoof.
“Just go ask him or I will teleport you to him myself.” Lomadia threatened.
“Fine fine! Jeez! You are so mean to me!” Lalna whined as he turned and began to trot off before turning back around and looking back at Lomadia with puppy dog eyes. “Um... Can you come with me?”
“Fine.” Lomadia said, rolling her eyes and sighing as he walked after him.
______________________________________________________________________________Back to the Futu- I mean Earth! )
“This is a dusty room...” Honeydew said, before sneezing, which made him jump a few inches into the air also making Xephos snicker.
“I still can’t believe you sneeze hard enough to push yourself back.” Xephos said snickering.
“You do too.” Honeydew said.
“Yeah, but mine is because my magic is affected by it.” Xephos said sneezing a bit and moving back a few inches while his magic made a small shockwave.
“That isn't an excuse.” Honeydew said, glaring at Xephos.
“Oh says you.” Xephos said rubbing his nose.
“Sorry about the dust, been awhile since we used it.” Lewis said before Honeydew sneezed again and he had to catch him.
“Sorry...” Honeydew said, smiling sheepishly as Lewis put him back down.
“Ah it’s okay. I think I can get most of it.” Xephos said as his horn began to glow before he sneezed and his magic made a small ‘POP’ as it was released. “Stupid dust. Can I have a tissue please?”
“Here you go.” Simon said walking in with a box of Tissues and handing one to Xephos before giving one to Honeydew. Xephos walked out of the room and blew his nose before tossing the tissue away and walking back in.
“Okay! Now I can do this!” Xephos said with a confident smile.
“I did it already.” Honeydew said smiling as Lewis and Simon had amazed looks.
“Oh darn you, you little bugger.” Xephos said slumping and casting an annoyed glare at the small pony as he looked around the cleaned room, and the pile of dust bunnies, layers of dust, and just mounds of dust in the large trash can.
“Earth pony!” Honeydew said smiling.
“You take all the fun out of using magic.” Xephos said crossing his hooves and pouting.
“You made cleaning a room look hard.” Honeydew said.
“You think anything involving magic is hard.” Xephos said.
“Because its hard to learn and harder to understand then earth pony magic.” Honeydew said.
“Because you aren’t a unicorn.” Xephos deadpanned.
“My mother was a unicorn.” Honeydew said.
“What are we talking about!?” Hannah shouted suddenly in the doorway startling everyone, and pony, in the room.
“Loud!” Honeydew said, covering his ears.
“Sorry.” Hannah said sheepishly. “I sometimes shout when I get confused.”
“They were talking about how Honeydew’s mother was a unicorn or something.” Lewis sighed
“Ooooh. I see.” Hannah said nodding as she understood. “Still confused, but less than before.”
“Anyway, the room is clean now thanks to Honeydew, so you can sleep here now.” Lewis said, rubbing the back of his head.
“That works!” Xephos said running and jumping onto the bed and jumping on it before bouncing a bit. “Wow... It is soft.”
“Really?” Honeydew asked, before jumping onto it as well and somersaulting, “It is soft.” He said smiling.
“Hey, Honeydew, I have to ask.” Xephos said rolling a bit. “Where in Equestria did you find Israphel? I mean, that guy is super shy.”
“What?” Honeydew asked confused as he stopped somersaulting and lied down.
“The white unicorn with red eyes? He sleeps in our guest room sometimes when it’s too dark out?” Xephos said trying to jog Honeydew’s memory.
“I know who he is, I found him far away from the other ponies who were watching us, nopony was around him and he looked lonely, so I went and talked to him. He was nice and a good friend.” Honeydew said.
“Huh. He is a nice stallion isn’t he?” Xephos said laying his head onto the bed.
“Yes he is.” Honeydew said nodding.
“I just don’t understand why he is so scared of everything.” Xephos said scratching his small goatee.
“He told me that everypony thought he was the evil one in the simulation and he doesn’t like that ponies think of him that way because of how he looks, that’s why he is quiet.” Honeydew said.
“Well yeah, I knew that much. But he is worse than that one mare in ponyville. You know, the vet?” Xephos said.
“Fluttershy? Why do you keep forgetting the elements names?” Honeydew asked.
“I am forgetful?” Xephos asked awkwardly shrugging.
“What's wrong with fluttershy?” Honeydew asked.
“Nothing! It’s just she is all shy and stuff just like Israphel. Like somepony made a slightly scary and male version of her. Only MORE shy and easily terrified.” Xephos said.
“Who now?” Lewis asked, looking at Simon and Hannah.
“Oh Israphel is just this pony that helps with our shows! He is a real sweet guy. but isn’t exactly what you would call... Talkative.” Xephos said making air quotes with his hooves on the last word.
“Was talking about Fluttershy...” Lewis muttered under his breath.
“Aaaanyway.” Xephos said turning to Honeydew again. “Do you think the others are figuring out what happened right now?”
“Probably, and if Lalna did set fire to the spell, they can make a new spell or something.” Honeydew said smiling.
“Alright good, good... There is one thing I’m worried about.” Xephos said tapping his chin with his hoof.
“What?” Honeydew asked, sitting up.
“Well. Lalna was never exactly... Content being around Israphel, remember the first time they met?” Xephos said chuckling.
“Nope!” Honeydew said.
“So you don’t remember him screaming like a little filly?” Xephos said laughing.
“I don’t know which was doing that.” Honeydew said laughing a little.
“Good point!” Xephos said laughing out loud.
______________________________________________________________________________Back in Equestria )
“Why are you acting like a foal?” Lomadia asked as she pushed Lalna with her head.
“Because that guy is scary!!” Lalna whined as he tried to put his hoofs in front of him to slow down their pace.
“He isn’t scary! You’re acting like a filly who thinks the headless horse is out to get you.” Lomadia said, pushing harder.
“But he is!” Lalna argued.
“It isn’t his fault for the way he looks, you two didn’t have a good first meeting.” Lomadia said, picking her head up and opting to take Lalna in her magic rather than shove him.
“We screamed at each other for an hour.” Lalna said as he sat in the dirt. “I don’t even know why we were screaming.”
“You were screaming because of how he looked, he was screaming because you were screaming at him.” Lomadia explained as she picked Lalna up in her magic.
“But what am I supposed to think when I see a winged Unicorn with glowing red eyes!?” Lalna shouted as he flailed around a bit in the magical glow.
“That he is albino and you shouldn't freak out over an albino with a birth defect.” Lomadia said, making her magic grip Lalna tighter in anger.
“Hey! I didn’t say he was a freak, I said he was scary! There is a difference!” Lalna said looking at Lomadia.
“That still hurt his feelings.” Lomadia said, letting go of her magic and allowing Lalna to fall to the ground.
“Ow...” Lalna said picking himself up and dusting off his science coat. “Okay fine, I won’t say anything mean, or scream, or do anything else that you think is offensive to him.”
“That’s nice to hear at least.” A voice said from in front of them. Lalna and Lomadia both looked forward and saw a white pony with an equally white mane and tail as well as glowing red eyes with a horn and wings looking at them, his cutie mark being a bow that blended in nicely with his white fur.
“Eep!” Lalna yipped as he somewhat hid behind Lomadia.
“Hello to you too...” Israphel said wearily as he sat down.
“Eh heh heh... Sorry. Just still not used to... Your uniqueness?” Lalna said unsure and looking at Lomadia.
“Your an idiot.” Lomadia said, kicking her left back leg into Lalna’s chest.
“I am sorry! I can’t help what makes me scared.” Lalna whispered back as he rubbed a hoof against his now bruised chest.
“I’m not that scary.” Israphel said.
“Um... Anyhow.” Lalna said stepping out from behind Lomadia. “We need your help with something.”
“Did you blow something up again?” Israphel sighed.
“One time and the whole group thinks I am nothing but a pyromaniac.” Lalna said facehoofing. “No, I was trying to find Xephos and Honeydew and teleported to them, but I scared Xephos making them teleport and now they are gone!”
“Have you tried finding the spell he was using? It might help you find them, you love sneaking up on ponies while they are doing something important.” Israphel noted.
“Well it is fun to see their reactions.” Lalna said chuckling nervously. “But thanks for the advice. You sure you haven’t seen them walking around anywhere?”
“I would have told you if I had seen them instead of telling you what to look for.” Israphel said frowning.
“Right... I’m an idiot.” Lalna said facehugging again and slowly dragging his hoof off his face before smiling. “Well thanks anyway, I am going back to find that scroll. Hopefully it didn’t burn up when they teleported.”
“I will go with you.” Israphel said, standing up.
“Eeeh... Okay.” Lalna said defeated as he turned and began walking back to the area where Xephos and Honeydew once were.
“You are an idiot.” Lomadia whispered to Lalna as Israphel followed after them.
“Hey, don’t start being mean to me just because I get startled easily by a winged unicorn with glowing red eyes whose cutie mark is a bow and arrow!” Lalna hissed quietly.
“I can hear you.” Israphel said as he trotted up next to them. Lalna just groaned and shook his head before looking ahead and continuing on his route.
“Everypony is against me.” Lalna grumbled as he trotted a little ways ahead. After awhile he looked behind him to see if they were still following, before he turned back to the road, but unfortunately they had been walking for quite sometime and he ran face first into a building. He slid down to the ground and groaned. “How come everything in this world hates me?”
“Maybe the house hates you.” Lomadia said laughing as she walked into it with Israphel.
“Oh shut up...” Lalna said as he got up and rubbed his nose before walking over into the grass and looking around. “Come on, come on... Where are you, you stupid piece of paper.”
He kept looking around for a few minutes before he heard screaming from the clouds. He looked up to see a golden yellow pegasus with a dark brown mane with a big bushy mustache goatee with a hammer cutie mark flying away as he was being chased by a grey pegasus with a black mane and stubble lining his jaw and a shovel and pick crossed over each other for his cutie mark.
“Whyyyyy you, Get back over here you mother bucker youuu!” The grey pegasus shouted as he chased after the golden pegasus.
“No, leave me alone!” The golden pegasus said as he looked behind him, not seeing where he was going and crashing into the ground next to Lalna.
“That looked like it hurt.” Lalna said snickering as the gray pegasus flew down and landed in front of Lalna.
“I’m alive!” The golden pegasus said, standing up quickly and preening his feathers quickly to fix them.
“Not for long you aren’t!” The grey pegasus shouted as he tackled the golden pegasus as Lalna blinked and just stood there with a confused expression.
“Sips, Sjin! What is going on here!?” Lalna finally shouted.
“I didn’t do anything!” Sjin yelled as he pushed Sips off him and stood up and flew into the air.
“Don’t make me tackle from the air again!” Sips shouted starting to fly before Lalna put both of them on the ground with a bit of magic and held them there, staring at them.
“Okay, one: Sips stop trying to kill Sjin, and two: Sjin, why is Sips trying to murder you?” Lalna asked.
“I dropped dirt.” Sjin said making Sips snort in anger and Lalna facehoof before slowly looking at Sips.
“Don’t give me that look! You know that dirt is important!” Sips defended.
“Okay now you are just being silly.” Lalna said looking at Sips then looking to Sjin. “And you stop... Dropping dirt.”
“I didn’t mean to!” Sjin yelled.
“You lie!” Sips shouted back.
“Okay now this is just getting ridiculous! Lomadia! I need your help and diplomacy out here!” Lalna yelled at the house.
“Why are you always getting in trouble?” Lomadia said as she opened the back door and looked out at Lalna.
“It’s not me this time. It’s Sips and Sjin.” Lalna said annoyed.
“That’s even worse.” Lomadia said, walking out of the house.
“I’ll get you and bury you in the high quality dirt you ruined!” Sips shouted as he flailed and tried to grab Sjin.
“It isn’t exactly high quality if I dropped it before it could be processed!” Sjin yelled, getting further away from Sips.
“That’s even worse! You mother bucker!” Sips shouted as he struggled in Lalna’s magic.
“Stop yelling at me!” Sjin yelled.
“Lomadia!” Lalna bellowed out in annoyance. “Please help here!”
“What am I supposed to do?” Lomadia asked calmly, “Do you want me to get a dog to bite them again?”
“No! Just... Go get something or somepony to calm them down! I don’t care!” Lalna said as Sips slowly made his way to Sjin through the magic. “It’s getting harder to keep this guy in check!”
“Why are you yelling?” Israphel muttered as he walked out the door and saw the scene in front of him, “Oh...”
“Oh hey Israphel, can you push Sjin just a few hoofs closer to me?” Sips asked looking at Israphel.
“Why would I do that?” Israphel asked
“Because he spilled dirt and needs to be mangled.” Sips said plainly.
“That... doesn’t make sense.” Israphel said confused.
“HE SPILT DIRT, CELESTIA DAMN IT!” Sips bellowed out as he resumed trying to strangle Sjin.
“There is dirt everywhere... We are standing on dirt.” Israphel said, putting a hoof into the dirt as an example.
“Okay let me be more specific. He spilt my high quality dirt.” Sips said nodding his head as he kept trying to get to Sjin.
“I have seen your ‘high quality’ dirt before.” Israphel said, doing air quotes. “And it just looked like regular dirt to me, nothing special.”
“Oooh. You just crossed the imaginary line that I drew earlier this day!” Sips shouted as he glared at Israphel. “And here I thought you appreciated my dirt! YOU TRAITOR!”
“Sips, you’re starting to go insane from the factory.” Sjin said getting out of Lalna’s magic while Sips was still walking inside it, trying to catch him.
“And you build silly things!” Sips retorted pointing a hoof at Sjin.
“Building houses is silly?” Sjin asked.
“Yes!... Although I have been up for several days and I have drank more coffee than Celestia does each morning!” Sips said as he flailed a bit more.
“Does this count as me being diplomatic?” Lomadia asked Lalna.
“Are you doing anything that helps?” Lalna said looking at Lomadia. “I think Israphel is going to replace you for that.”
“I didn’t really have to do much diplomacy, this happens every day Lalna.” Lomadia pointed out.
“Oh... I should really stop spending so much time in my lab.” Lalna said rubbing his head. “You know what, I am done.” He sighed as he let his magic go and watched as Sips tackled Sjin again before Sips yelled something out.
“Anyway...I found a scroll on the living room floor.” Israphel said, ignoring the fighting as he took out a scroll with his magic.
“Ah good!” Lalna said as he took it and began to read over it. “Hmmm... It’s rather vague. Just a few pointers.”
“Its the spell you gave to Xephos, Lalna.” Lomadia noted.
“I know, but he came to me while I was working. You know how I get when I am working.” Lalna said looking over the scroll. “I can’t even remember what I gave him.”
“It was to help with the simulations I think, so that he could get a illusion of tinpony because of what happened.” Lomadia reminded him.
“I thought Tinpony was a machine somepony made.” Lalna said confused.
“A machine somepony made that stole the bits we earned, we had to fire who was controlling him.” Lomadia said.
“Oh... So wait do we still have him or is he gone?” Lalna said tilting his head.
“I took the liberty of taking him and making him into something useful.” Israphel said.
“Oh really? Like what?” Lalna asked looking at Israphel.
“I made him into a self cooking oven.” Israphel said.
“Huh... Weird.” Lalna said.
“Little help here!” Sjin yelled pushing Sips off him.
“I am going to kill you with dirt!” Sips shouted as he chased after Sjin again. “Get over here!”
“No!” Sjin yelled flying over to the house and running inside.
“I said get back here you mother bucker!” Sips bellowed out as he chased Sjin into the house as many things crashing and being tossed around was heard.
“Does this happen often?” Lalna said looking at Lomadia with an unamused expression.
“This is the first time Sjin has gone into the house to run away from Sips, but that is probably because he usually smashes into the closed door.” Lomadia said, wincing as more things crashed.
“HA HA! TASTE THE POWER OF DIRT!” Sips shouted as something was heard crashing into the wall.
“YOU’RE NOT THROWING DIRT AT ME, YOU'RE THROWING FURNITURE!” Sjin yelled.
“FURNITURE MADE OF DIRT!” Sips bellowed while laughing insanely.
“It isn’t made of dirt sips!” Lomadia yelled.
“Then I shall change it to dirt and then throw it at Sjin!” Sips shouted.
“I will call the guard if you do that!” Lomadia threatened.
“Oh fine!.... HA DIRT TO THE FACE!” Sips bellowed out as the sound of dirt being thrown was heard.
“MY EYES!” Sjin yelled as he ran out of the house holding a hoof to his eyes and bumped into Lalna.
“Oi! Don’t be bumping into me!” Lalna said pushing Sjin off to the side.
“I didn't mean too!” Sjin yelled as he opened his eyes, revealing them to be bloodshot.
“Ooooh... I would go find some water.” Lalna said wincing slightly.
“I hate you.” Sjin said as he looked around
“Where are Xephos and Honeydew, they are usually here by now?” He asked confused.
“They blew up!” Lalna said dramatically. Lomadia facehoofed and Israphel covered his face with his wings while he shook his head back and forth.
“So they are dead? I would think Lomadia would be crying.” Sjin noted.
“Oh no she is just in shock.” Lalna said waving his hoof dismissively.
“No I’m not.” Lomadia said, putting her hoof back down. Lalna let out a loud cough as he kicked her front leg with his back leg. “Ow you mother bucking...” She yelped as she lifted her hoof and started to sniffle.
“See? You just brought on the waterworks! You proud of yourself?” Lalna said looking at Sjin.
“I actually am because I know you're lying.” Sjin said as Lomadia glared at Lalna and kicked him with her back hooves in the chest again, this time harder.
“Ow!... Jeez I try to make a joke... Anyway, Xephos and Honeydew might be on another planet or dimension.” Lalna said rubbing his chest with a hoof and wincing slightly. Sips came running out of the house before he tackled Sjin again.
“YAA! I will teach you to spill my dirt on the floor!” Sips shouted.
“You already taught me.” Sjin said calmly.
“I did?” Sips said tilting his head with a hoof raised in the air.
“Yes.” Sjin said, nodding.
“Oh... Huh.... Well, I will see you back at Sips Co.” Sips said shrugging and standing up and taking flight before heading off into the distance. Lalna blinked and looked at Sjin.
“What?” Was all he could say.
“That’s the only way to get him to stop attacking me.” Sjin said.
“Agreeing with him?” Lalna said scratching his chin.
“By lying and saying he already taught me a lesson about letting go of dirt.” Sjin corrected him.
“Huh... Sips is strange.” Lalna said shrugging and picking the scroll back up.
“Well, I gota go.” Sjin said, taking off into the air, “Have fun looking for them.” He yelled before disappearing in the clouds.
“See ya Sjin! Don’t spill any more dirt!” Lalna laughed before looking over the scroll again. “Okay... I think I have an idea.”
“I think I have to clean the house now, I need to keep the door closed now.” Lomadia muttered, walking into the house and leaving Lalna with Israphel.
“Anyway, if I can find that spell that Xephos uses, I can possibly find a way to find them.” Lalna said.
“You have to factor in the fact that you scared him into teleporting.” Israphel reminded him.
“I know I know. Just gimme a minute to figure this out.” Lalna said as he looked over the scroll. “Well again, I just need the spell and I may be able to find out where they went.”
“How many spells do you put on a scroll?” Israphel asked.
“Eh...” Lalna mumbled something as he counted before looking at Israphel. “Around twenty?”
“Why?” Israphel asked.
“Most of them are stabilizers and a few energy converters nothing to hard.” Lalna said waving a hoof at Israphel. “One is strange though. It was a strange combo of the two along with a definition enhancer. Pretty much this whole thing was to make their sim a lot more realistic.”
“So we don't know which it was.” Israphel stated.
“Well... Kinda. We could just use them all at once, but considering you’re not supposed to do that...” Lalna trailed off. “That may be why they evaporated when Xephos teleported.”
“Xephos wouldn’t do that.” Israphel said.
“He had Honeydew with him.” Lalna said.
“He would be even more careful.” Israphel said.
“Be that as it may, it doesn’t change the fact that Xephos may not have followed instructions. In fact I am pretty sure he just took the scroll and left when I started talking.” Lalna said scrunching up his nose.
“He does do that sometimes.” Israphel agreed, “But he didn't know that you would teleport in front of him and scare him.”
“Well I was trying to warn him. Guess thats Ironic ain’t it?” Lalna said chuckling.
“Yes...” Israphel said frowning a little.Back on Earth )
The ponies had left there new room and had gone back to the living room to try their hoof at another game, Simon told them the game they were playing now was called Halo.
“So... Click this button to throw a small bomb?” Xephos said as Master chief threw a Plasma grenade against the wall and then blew up. “Well that backfired.”
“You have been asking that three times already, yes!” Lewis said exasperated.
“Sorry, I keep forgetting!... And then blowing myself up!” Xephos said as he respawned and began again. “Okay... So I am killing these aliens for what reason?”
“They are in a war that is lasting years.” Lewis said.
“Huh. That’s weird... Oh Celestia that is nasty!” Xephos shouted as the purple blood splattered the walls.
“HA HA!...I just killed you...” Honeydew said as he walked over to Xephos’ dead character.
“Damn it! I thought this was that weird campaign thing.” Xephos said looking at his remote.
“I didn’t think ponies swore.” Hannah said sitting on the couch.
“I didn’t think ponies played video games.” Simon retorted.
“Touche.” Hannah said.
“Buck!” Honeydew shouted as he shot wildly at an alien chasing him, not hitting him once and losing all his ammo.
“Ha!” Xephos laughed as he saw the alien pummel Honeydew. “You shouldn’t have wasted ammo on killing me!”
“It was an accident, I thought you were an alien!” Honeydew said, his ears going back on his head.
“This is certainly the most interesting day we have had in awhile.” Hannah said chuckling at the two bickering ponies.
“Yes, and also somewhat annoying.” Lewis muttered looking at the ponies.
“Oh come on Lewis, it’s not everyday you get to watch ponies play video games.” Simon said.
“How do you even do that!?” Xephos shouted as he flipped a massive tank. “That guy doesn’t have magic!”
“You blew it up?” Honeydew suggested.
“But I have no more of those pineapples that explode.” Xephos said.
“Grenades.” Lewis said exasperated.
“Yeah those.” Xephos said.
“Somepony else exploded it?” Honeydew said.
“Without an explosion?” Xephos asked.
“Fine.” Honeydew said, walking over to the tank and throwing a grenade at it, making it explode and turn over. “Now somepony exploded it.”
“And it was just flipped over too....” Xephos muttered.
“Here is a question I want to ask.” Hannah said looking at Simon and Lewis. “If those guys are the pony versions of you two, does that mean that there are pony versions of everyone else we know?”
“Yes...but we didn't tell them what they are.” Lewis said, looking over at the ponies to make sure they didn't hear Hannah, seeing that they were absorbed in the game and not listening to them, he looked back at her. “I guess it is possible since they are from somewhere else that they would have pony versions of everyone.”
“That’s weird. But kinda cool.” Hannah said smiling. “Would be interesting to meet the pony version of myself.”
“Considering I am looking at what you just said. It would be kinda scary to see you as a pony Hannah.” Simon snickered.
“Hey!” Hannah said softly smacking Simon.
“It would also be terrifying when she went into heat.” Lewis muttered. Hannah just rolled her eyes and continued to watch the ponies play.
“Oh what does this tubey thing do?” Xephos said before he exploded himself with the rocket launcher, making Honeydew laugh. “Oh son of a manticore!”
“So much for this game.” Lewis said.
“Maybe we should let them play something easier?” Hannah suggested.
“How about Mario?” Simon said with a smile.
“What’s Mario?” Honeydew asked as Lewis changed the game.
“One of the greatest pixelated games ever made.” Simon said grinning widely.
______________________________________________________________________________
“So they are plumbers, but they don't do any plumbing?” Honeydew asked.
“Well they go down pipes.” Simon said shrugging.
“That’s not plumbing, Simon.” Lewis said.
“And I am pretty sure plumbers don’t jump on turtles and squash them.” Simon retorted.
“They aren't plumbers at all.” Honeydew said.
“Well to be honest I have no idea what this whole game is even about.” Simon said shrugging. “All I know is it’s really addicting. Just look at Xephos.” Simon pointed to Xephos who was focusing intently on the game.
“Stop leaving me behind, your making me go into a bubble!” Honeydew yelled, flying back to Xephos in a bubble for the tenth time.
“Huh?” Xephos said shaking his head. “What?”
“You leave me behind and I end up in a bubble.” Honeydew said.
“Oh sorry... “ Xephos said sheepishly smiling.
“Its fine, just wait for me.” Honeydew said sighing.
“Alright.” Xephos said.
“What did you say about this being easy?” Lewis muttered to Hannah.
“Hey Xephos is doing pretty well.” Hannah said shrugging. “To be honest I am more worried about if the others find out.”
“They won't, we are doing well at making sure they don't know, the only reason we told you was because of the risk of them being hurt on accident by you not knowing.” Lewis said.
“I said I was sorry! God.” Hannah said crossing her arms and pouting. “I am never going to hear the end of that.”
“I’m not talking about the washing machine thing! I am just saying even if that hadn't happened we would have had to tell you sooner or later, that just gave us the extra push to do it, jesus.” Lewis defended.
“Well you still didn’t have to bring that up.” Hannah stated.
“You brought it up, I was just saying that anything could have happened.” Lewis said.
“You know what I think?” Xephos said turning to look at both of them.
“What?” Lewis sighed.
“I think you both need a cup of tea.” Xephos said smiling.
“Tea does sound good right now.” Simon chimed in shrugging. “Although we do have coffee if you guys prefer.
“What’s coffee?” Honeydew asked, looking up at Simon as he paused the game.
“Well...It’s... Hard to explain. It’s made from a bean, but it’s very good.” Simon said smiling. “A bit bitter though.”
“I would like to try that.” Honeydew said, smiling back.
“Well alright, so tea and coffee. Where are the jaffas to add to the mix! We’ll have a regular old tea party.” Simon chuckled out standing up and heading to the kitchen.
“Are we seriously going to give a pony coffee full of sugar?” Lewis asked, looking at Hannah.
“Hey it wasn’t my idea, it was Xephos’.” Hannah said pointing to Xephos who tilted his head in confusion.
“I said tea...” Xephos mumbled out.
“He has a point.” Lewis said.
“Well then it’s going to be Simon’s fault.” Hannah said nodding.
“Does anyone else have a sense of impending doom?” Xephos asked scratching his head.
“I would even if you were going to have the coffee.” Lewis stated.
______________________________________________________________________________
“I think that the coffee was a bad idea.” Simon said as he sipped at his cup.
“I fucking told you.” Lewis said.
“Oh my gosh guys this stuff is great we don't have this stuff back in Equestria and I bet I could dig so many holes if I just kept drinking this stuff!!!” Honeydew shouted incredibly fast as he drank from the mug in front of him as Xephos rubbed his head.
“Holy fucking shit.” Lewis muttered.
“I think he broke my brain.” Xephos mumbled as he rubbed his head.
“You would be dead if I did that and I would be sad because you would not be alive to drink this with me and I wouldn't have anypony to talk to besides my friend pedro!” Honeydew said, looking to the left at nothing.
“Wait who is Pedro?” Xephos asked looking at the jittery and twitching Honeydew.
“He is right there, he is a kangaroo!” Honeydew said, waving his arm to where he was looking.
“Why did you give him coffee!?” Lewis yelled exasperated as he looked at Simon.
“Because he asked for it!” Simon defended. “How was I supposed to know one cup would make him act like he was on crack!?”
“Because apparently they don’t have coffee where they are from and its full of sugar!” Lewis said.
“To be fair, we have soda and cupcakes.” Xephos stated.
“Does that make it any less worse right now?” Lewis asked.
“You should be more worried about the caffeine crash.” Xephos said.
“PEDRO!” Honeydew shouted, running around the room again while drinking the coffee.
“I wish it would come...” Lewis said, following Honeydew with his eyes, which wasn't easy.
“Just give it a few moments. Also I should warn you.” Xephos began as he stood up allowing Honeydew to dart under his legs before he walked over and hopped onto the couch and laid down. “He is going to smash into something when he crashes.”
“He is worse than Zoey when she gets a Mountain Dew.” Hannah said rubbing her temples.
“Is it at all possible for us to try and catch him?” Lewis asked.
“Nope.” Xephos said laying his head on his hooves. “To be honest, this is kinda funny to watch.”
“XEPHOS!” Honeydew said, jumping on top of Xephos.
“You’re right, this is.” Lewis said, smiling as he watched the small pony jump up and down on his friend.
“Hey, throw a blanket over him.” Xephos said smiling as he used a bit of magic to put Honeydew back on the ground. “Trust me it’s funny.”
“If you're holding him in your magic I don't see why we can't just grab him and hold him until he calms down.” Lewis stated.
“Because that doesn’t burn his energy. Plus he if he drains himself while in the blanket, he won’t have to worry about being put in bed.” Xephos said shrugging.
“But if we hold him and the caffeine eventually burns away then he will still calm down even if he is being held.” Lewis said.
“Okay okay.” Xephos said as Honeydew flailed in his magical grip. “This is so strange to watch.”
“It’s also really stupid how we gave him coffee.” Lewis said.
“Okay I get it, It was a bad idea.” Simon said sighing as he sipped at his own cup of coffee.
“PEDRO IS IN YOUR HEAD!” Honeydew shouted at noone in particular as he tried running in Xephos’ magic.
“I wonder what everypony else is doing.” Xephos said.
“Probably not dealing with a psycho pony on a caffeine rush.” Lewis muttered, picking Honeydew up out of Xephos’ magic and holding him as he tried to escape, “No more coffee for him.” He said.
Chapter 5: Meet the crew!
Of Ponies and Jaffas
By: Pen Brush and Slayerbrony
Lalna and Israphel, along with Lomadia, who had finished fixing the house, had been working tirelessly to finish the work on the return spell that would, hopefully, bring back their friends. In order to make sure that nothing went wrong, they called a meeting of all the Yogscast to a meeting to explain the situation.
They all were meeting outside in the clear air as everypony sat in the grass as Lalna, Lomadia, and Israphel stood in front of everyone, Israphel unnerving everypony a little bit. Rythian and Zoey walked over and sat down the farthest away from Lalna as they eyed him warily.
Rythian was a purple unicorn with a bandanna covering his mouth as he wore a cloak and coat over his back. His cutie mark was an alchemy bottle surrounded by a magical mist. Zoey was a bouncy red unicorn with a maroon mane and a strange maroon stripe lining her right cheek. Her Cutie mark was a series of Ones and Zeros that showed a binary code.
Nilesy walked into view as he walked to the middle of the field and sat down. He was a light blue Earth pony with a dark black mane. His cutie mark was a Cuit mark pool. He sighed and looked around before giving a confused look painted on his face.
LittleWood and Toby were the last two to join the small get together as they both walked into the area of green. Both being earth ponies, LittleWood was green with a blonde mane and tail. His cutie mark was a sapling growing out of the ground while Toby was a dark grey color with a coal black mane and a sword as his cutie mark. They walked over and sat next to Nilesy before looking at Lalna. Sjin and Sips both fluttered down to the ground and stretched a bit before laying in the grass.
“Alright! I guess you are all wondering why I call you all here today!” Lalna yelled so everypony could hear.
“Considering him, it’s probably to say he needs another building because he blew up the other one.” Rythian mumbled making Zoey giggle next to him.
“I’m not making him another one...” Sjin muttered.
“What else would we be wondering you crazy unicorn!?” Sips shouted.
“Do you want to make trees grow with your science again?” Little wood asked.
“Or try and make a self heating pool?” Nilesy added.
“Or kill us all with a massive laser?” Toby asked making everypony look at him weirdly. “He tried it before!” He defended.
“I ate that stupid blue plan- look that doesn’t matter!” Lalna shouted. “It’s about Honeydew and Xephos!”
“Did you kill them with the laser?” Toby asked. Lalna facehoofed and slowly dragged the hoof off his face before turning to Israphel.
“You want to handle this? They obviously think I am insane.” Lalna said taking a few steps back. Israphel shook his head and didn’t speak. “Really?... Oh you hate talking to crowds right?” Israphel nodded and looked at the ground. Lalna stepped back up and sighed. “Alright, look. I am not insane, I am not trying to kill anypony, and I would REALLY like your attention for five minutes alright!?” Lalna shouted.
“Yes, that helps your case a lot.” Lomadia said, rolling her eyes.
“Oh hush you. I don’t see you helping out at all.” Lalna said looking back at Lomadia with a less than amused expression.
“Lalna made Xephos teleport somewhere by scaring him.” Lomadia stated, looking at the ponies in front of her.
“Oh see, that I believe.” Rythian snickered.
“So you didn’t at all turn them into trees?” Little wood asked.
“No! I am not that crazy!” Lalna shouted in frustration..
“I’m not saying it was on purpose.” Little Wood said.
“At least we don’t have to scrub you with water to get the poison joke out again.” Toby muttered as Nisley listened and didn't say anything.
“Anyway...” Lalna began. “We need everyponies’ help to get them back. That means unicorns for their magic, earth ponies to gather ingredients for potions, and pegasi to make sure the clouds in the area aren’t interfering with our plans. Hopefully, if my adjustments to the spell work right, we should have Xephos and Honeydew back in no time!”
“Do you want ingredients... from trees?” Little wood asked, smirking.
“... If they come from trees, then yes.” Lalna said unsure.
“He is messing with you.” Lomadia said, rolling her eyes.
“Oh hush you.” Lalna said.
“If Lalna made that spell, I would not doubt that something is going to blow up.” Rythian said shaking his head. “But if it means getting our friends back....”
“Yeah! And I can use my amazing computer skills to work out equations if need be!” Zoey said smiling and slightly hopping in place.
“I think we would be sleeping in the clouds more than anything.” Sjin said, looking pointedly at Sips.
“Most likely.” Sips said chuckling.
“Well... I don’t know much about ingredients. But I can make a good pit for them to go in I guess.” Nilesy said sheepishly.
“Why would a pit be needed for anything?” Little Wood asked, turning to Nilsey.
“I don’t know. Make something look pretty?” Nilesy said shrugging. “Like you could put stuff in the pit and there you go!”
“The only thing you put in a pit, is a tree.” Little Wood stated matter of factly.
“Why did you bring them here again?” Lomadia asked.
“Well..... I don’t know.” Lalna said scratching his head. “In fact, I am pretty sure I only invited Little and Rythian.”
“Things spread fast in the clouds.” Sjin said laughing.
“OH hush you! Or I’ll make you spill dirt again!” Lalna said looking at Sjin.
“Sips will know you did it.” Sjin said.
“Who did what?” Sips asked looking at Sjin confused.
“Lalna spilled dirt.” Sjin said.
“HE DID WHAT!?” Sips shouted in anger as he glared at Lalna.
“Calm down you insane Pegasus.” Lalna groaned facehoofing again.
“Did you hear what he said? He called you insane!” Sjin said, smiling a little.
“Oooh, why I outta-!” Sips began.
“QUIET!” Israphel yelled, standing up, making everypony jump and look at him.
“Holy shit, you actually spoke.” Sips said awed. “I thought you were mute or something.”
“You saw him speak when you were chasing Sjin before.” Lomadia said.
“I did? Oh sorry, I must have been too busy trying to kill Sjin.” Sips said chuckling.
“You can...finish what you were saying...” Israphel said, sitting down and looking back at the ground.
“Well thanks.” Lalna said smiling at Israphel. “Anyway Rythian, Zoey, Israphel, Lomadia, and I are all going to be working the kinks out of the spell before we test it. So if anyone has any questions, ask them now.”
“Is Israphel also considered to be a pegasus that can help with the clouds?” Sjin asked.
“Um.... I guess?.... Really it’s up to him.” Lalna said looking at Israphel.
“It’s fine, lets just do what we are going to do and get them back.” Lomadia said.
“Right. So if everypony who has a horn, would follow me that would be fantastic!” Lalna said gesturing to Lomadia’s house before walking towards it. Lomadia followed after with Israphel, who was walking with his head down, while Rythian and Zoey simply teleported inside to wait, while the others left outside started doing their jobs.
It had been a few hours as the ponies were slowly ironing out all the flaws and kinks of the spell. They were working tirelessly as they made sure everything was perfect. Lalna ran a hoof through his mane as he looked over the spell again and again.
“I can’t help but feel something is missing.” Lalna muttered as he glared at the piece of paper.
“Yeah, the explosion.” Rythian muttered as he pulled down his bandana to sip at a cup of coffee.
“Rythian! Be nice! We are trying to get Xephos and Honeydew back.” Zoey said lightly smacking Rythian’s foreleg.
“Maybe the thing that is missing is the actual spell that they used.” Lomadia suggested.
“..... Oh buck my brain.” Lalna said slamming his face against the table.
“Anypony would forget that.” Lomadia said soothingly.
“I didn’t.” Rythian chuckled.
“You are not helping, why are you fighting a war with him anyway?” Lomadia asked.
“It’s this long story. It involves nukes, magic, and a whole lot of yelling. Oh and Sjin.” Rythian said.
“You are both crazy.” Lomadia sighed.
“I AM NOT CRAZY!” Rythian shouted as he angrily slammed a hoof against the table.
“Rythian... We talked about not being hostile.” Zoey said sternly as Rythian sighed and calmed down.
“Sorry Lomadia.” Rythian grumbled as he leaned back in his seat.
“It’s fine.” Lomadia said.
“How do you lose the scroll so easily?” Israphel muttered, looking around.
“It’s like looking for a pen! You can never find it until you look in the most obvious place!” Zoey said bouncing out of her seat.
“Or until you don’t need it, then you find it, that is always annoying.” Lomadia said. Zoey began to look around the house while Lalna helped search the place. This carried on for a good ten minutes until Rythian noticed something.
“Israphel?... Are you sitting on it?” Rythian asked pointing to a piece of paper under Israphel.
“I would have noticed if I was sitting on it.” Israphel stated.
“Then what is that you are sitting on?” Rythian asked.
“My grocery list.” Israphel said.
“Oh. Welp that’s odd.” Rythian said leaning back again.
“I don’t like anypony snooping on what I am going to get.” Israphel muttered.
“That.... Is actually understandable.” Rythian said nodding in agreement.
“HAH! I found it!” Lalna said.
“I found it...” Lomadia said, looking into the sink.
“Then what did I fin-.... Okay seriously? Who just leaves a bunch of scribbles on a piece of paper in the middle of the floor.” Lalna grumbled walking back into the kitchen.
“Honeydew?” Lomadia suggested as she took a wet scroll out from the sink.
“That would make sense!” Zoey said happily as she walked back in and sat next to Rythian.
“Is it still readable?” Lalna asked.
“As readable as a wet scroll can get before being unreadable, who put this in a sink?” Lomadia asked, putting it on the table.
“Well I might have been throwing things around a bit.” Zoey said blushing slightly out of embarrassment.
“And you didn't notice the scroll while doing that?” Lomadia asked incredulously.
“Well I don’t look at the things I am throwing!” Zoey defended. “That’s like a dog listening to it’s own bark!”
“Its important to look at what you throw, barking isn’t that important...” Lomadia said slowly.
“Mushrooms!” Zoey shouted quickly before hiding her head under her hooves.
“Sorry, Zoey is a bit crazy.” Rythian said as he patted Zoey on the back.
“Ya...Anyway, can you read it?” Lomadia asked Lalna.
“Barely.” Lalna said as he looked over the wet piece of paper. “I could dry it, but that might mess up the ink even more.”
“Try duplicating it.” Lomadia suggested.
“Then there will be two wet scrolls.” Lalna said looking at Lomadia.
“Then I don't know, maybe the pegasi can help.” Lomadia said.
“You want the two dirt workers to try and fix a wet scroll?” Lalna asked.
“One of them makes houses.” Lomadia reminded him.
“Alright then, I guess we have no other options.” Lalna said shrugging. “Go grab Sjin I guess.”
“Alright.” Lomadia said, walking out and looking into the sky to find the pegasi. She saw Sips sleeping on a cloud with Sjin flying next to him, trying to get him to sneeze. “Sjin we need you!” Lomadia yelled up to him.
“Really? With what? Did Lalna burn the inside of the house?” Sjin asked, smiling in amusement.
“No, we need you to help dry something.” Lomadia said.
“Alright.” Sjin said, flying down and following her into the house.
“Hey Sjin. Can you do anything to fix this drenched scroll?” Lalna asked pointing at the scroll.
“Yes I can.” Sjin said, sitting down and smiling.
“Well then do your pegasi magic if you would.” Lalna said returning the smile and getting up so Sjin could actually see the scroll.
“Ah, ok.” Sjin said, flying into the air and flying in circles around the scroll quickly, drying it before slowing down and sitting on the floor.
“Well then. I thought that would rip it apart.” Lalna said chuckling. “Thanks Sjin.”
“You’re welcome, I will go wake up Sips.” Sjin said, flying out of the house. Lalna nodded as he looked over the scroll again, sticking his tongue out as he concentrated and read the slightly blurred words.
“Hmmmmm.” He hummed as he looked. “I think I have it!”
“Thats great!” Lomadia said smiling. Lalna looked at the scroll one more time before floating a quill over to him and beginning to scribble on the new spell he was creating. After a few minutes of switching between looking at the new scroll and scribbling on it, then at the old blurred scroll again, Lalna finally set the quill down, watching the tip of the quill simply turn to dust from how fast he was writing.
“Okay... Now I have finished it.” Lalna said wiping the sweat from his brow and looking over the scroll to check for errors. The other ponies walked over and looked at the scroll.
“Doesn’t seem to be wrong in any areas.” Rythian mumbled as his eyes scanned every word of the scroll.
“Do we know what the spell really does though?” Lomadia asked.
“From his calculations, it will either be a window, or a door.” Rythian said leaning back.
“Oh Rythian, you are just being silly.” Zoey said gently shoving Rythian making him chuckle slightly.
“Magic can make doorways and windows, but usually not across realities if what Lalna says is true.” Lomadia said, thinking.
“Some powerful magic can, but not usually.” Israphel said, closing his eyes to think about it.
“Well only one way to find out.” Lalna said standing up and grabbing the scroll with his magic. “We are testing it.”
“Should we do it outside?” Lomadia suggested.
“Well that depends.” Lalna said tapping his chin. “You want to chance everything in your home getting burned or sucked into the spell if it fails?”
“What do you think my answer is?” Lomadia deadpanned.
“Yes.” Lalna said rolling his eyes eliciting a giggle from Zoey. “Alright, let’s go outside.”
“Yes.” Lomadia said, sighing a little in relief as they all went outside to see Little Wood planting a tree with Toby and Sips and Sjin watching them.
“Little, is that really all you and Toby have been doing?” Rythian asked as he shook his head.
“No, we have been looking underground to see if Honeydew is actually hiding.” Little Wood said, turning to look at him. Sjin and Sips stopped watching them plant trees and flew into the air, before lying on a cloud.
“... That works too.” Rythian said shrugging.
“Oh my gosh! Honeydew is hiding!?” Zoey shouted in awe as Rythian, Lomadia and Lalna facehoofed.
“Yes...please make me deaf, everything is loud.” Israphel muttered, making his ears go back against his head.
“Aaaanyway. Let’s try this. Everypony don’t be in front of this spell!” Lalna said as he walked out into the grass a bit more before opening the scroll and looking over it. He nodded his head a moment before his horn lit up and began to glow brightly. A few minutes later he finally released the spell creating a large circle shaped energy a few feet in front of him as he panted a bit. “Ha ha!... That took some work...” He muttered a bit as he panted.
“Is...Honeydew fighting a monkey?” Lomadia wondered, looking into the circle. Inside the window/door/circle thing the group of ponies crowded around to see Honeydew flailing about in the grip of a tall hairless creature with a set of glasses on it’s nose. The image widened to show Xephos between two other creatures along with him looking fatigued and on the verge of passing out. “Xephos!” Lomadia yelled, getting closer to the window before Lalna shouted making her stop.
“Lomadia wait! The Spell might get unstable if you touch it!” Lalna shouted as the spell began to waver slightly and began to glich.
“They are hurting him and Honeydew! Look at what is happening!” Lomadia said, pointing at the picture.
“Lomadia! Don’t a fool!” Rythian shouted as Zoey smacked him. “I mean! Get away from that thing!”
The spell began to turn to static and back as Lalna began to strain a bit to hold the image. The circle began to slowly shrink down as the image began to fade out.
“No!” Lomadia shouted, jumping at the circle and through it as it disappeared, along with her. Everyponies jaws dropped for a moment as they simply stared at where the spell had been.
“... Well that was unexpected.” Nilsey said from behind everyone.
“Oh buck... Xephos is going to kill me when they all get back home.” Lalna said double facehoofing.
“Can you try the spell again to get them back?” Israphel asked, walking over to Lalna.
“Yes!” Lalna said smiling suddenly as he picked up the scroll again. They all waited in silence as Lalna looked over the spell. There was a sudden ‘CRACK’ and ‘BOOM’ as a lightning bolt shot down and zapped the scroll, electrocuting Lalna as well. After the noise had settled there was a singed and soot covered Lalna and a pile of ash in Lalna’s magical grip.
“SIPS!” Sjin shouted from above everypony.
“What!? I didn’t do anything!” Sips defended.
“You jumped on the cloud! You might have hurt Lalna!” Sjin exclaimed, poking his head over the side of the cloud to look at the unicorns and earth ponies.
“Oh he will be fine. Luna knows he has been through worse.” Sips said rolling his eyes. Lalna down on the ground gritted his teeth as a look of pure rage filled his features as he began to slowly twitch with anger.
“Want me to get them?” Israphel asked hesitantly. Lalna through a hoof in the air and angrily shook it in the direction of Sips and Sjin.
“SSIIIIIIIIIIIPPSSSS!!!” He bellowed angrily to the sky.
“See? He is fine.” Sips said dismissively waving a hoof at Sjin.
“You might want to see what you did, they don’t look very happy.” Sjin observed as all the ponies turned to look up at Sips with small hints of anger in every one.
“Oh fine.” Sips sighed out as he hopped off the cloud and floated down to the ground before landing in front of everypony. “What’s up bitches?” The ponies just stared at him as Lalna’s ears literally started smoking. “What? What did I do? Oh Luna, did I fill the company kitchen up with the rejected mud again? I’ll get Sjin to grab a shovel and clear it out.”
“Sips.” Lalna growled out through gritted teeth. “Do you notice somepony missing from this little gathering?” The ponies started to walk away slowly backwards so as not to make him angrier.
“Uuuuh.... Well Sjin is up there.” Sips said looking up. “But uuuuhm.... Oh! Lomadia isn’t here! What do I win?”
“...” Lalna’s eyes just twitched angrily as Rythian walked over and whispered something to Sips.
“Oh shit... Really?” Sips said looking at Rythian before he nodded and walked away.
“You also destroyed the spell that could bring her and the others back...” Israphel whispered.
“... I am in deep shit here aren’t I?” Sips said sitting on his haunches.
“I don’t think I want to come down now...” Sjin said, hiding back into the cloud.
“Sips... Start running.” Lalna hissed as he began to hoof at the ground.
“Oh SHIT!” Sips shouted as he turned and began to gallop away as fast as he could as Lalna’ let out an almost feral roar before chasing after him. After the dust cleared only shouting and the silhouettes of the two could be seen. There was total silence before Nilesy broke the silence.
“Ah, he will be fine.” He said waving a hoof in the air.
Chapter 6: The newest addition and a movie!
Of Ponies and Jaffas
By: Pen Brush and Slayerbrony
“How many minutes has it been?” Simon asked.
“Around twenty.” Hannah responded as they both looked at the still crazed Honeydew.
“Yes, thanks for helping me.” Lewis said sarcastically as he struggled to hold Honeydew.
“Well what could we do? He is the size of a corgi puppy!” Simon said laughing. The sound of a door opening and closing was heard as Duncan walked into the picture.
“Hello everyo-... Why is Honeydew going crazy?” Duncan asked stopping in the doorway.
“Catch!” Lewis said, throwing Honeydew into the air towards Duncan and sat down on the couch with a sigh. Duncan hastily caught the crazed Honeydew as he looked at the twitching pony.
“... What did you guys do to this poor guy? Give him crack?!” Duncan said looking at Honeydew.
“PEDRO!!” Honeydew yelled, trying to get out of Duncan’s grasp.
“Simon gave him coffee...” Lewis sighed.
“Oh you guys just have the most brilliant ideas.” Duncan said rolling his eyes.
“It was Simon. Not me.” Hannah said pointing to Simon who was laughing.
“Well it’s not my fault! He asked nicely for it! And how am I supposed to refuse an adorable po-” Simon said before a bright flash filled the room and a loud ‘THUMP’ was heard as something fell on the floor. “WHAT WAS THAT!? A FLASH BANG!?”
“A flash bang wouldn’t be used for no reason.” Lewis said.
“Plus we would be blind and not able to hear each other.” Hannah said.
“Uhhh.” A voice said. Xephos snorted as he woke up and looked around.
“Who, what? Oh sorry guys, I must have dozed off.” Xephos said rubbing his eyes with a hoof.
“Xephos!” The voice said, before hooves sounded on the floor and a pony jumped on him.
“ACK!” Xephos shouted as a Purple unicorn hug tackled him into the cushions.
“Uh, Lewis. I think we might have to add another pony to the count.” Simon said nervously as he looked at the Purple Unicorn hugging the confused and dazed Xephos.
“I can see that.” Lewis muttered.
“Your ok!” The unicorn said happily, sitting up on the couch to look at Xephos.
“Right now, my lungs are collapsing, gimme a moment to breathe.” Xephos wheezed out as he shook his head to clear the sleep from his eyes.
“Sorry.” The unicorn said sheepishly, getting off him. Xephos coughed a moment before he leaned forward and looked at the purple pony.
“Lomadia?” He said completely astonished at the moment.
“Yes!” Lomadia said, nuzzling him happily. Xephos just wrapped his hooves around Lomadia before nuzzling her back as tears came to his eyes in the pure happiness he was feeling at that moment.
“Oh thank Celestia, I thought I’d never see you again!” Xephos shouted happily. Lomadia stopped the hug and looked at him, before hitting him on the shoulder. “Ow! What was that for?”
“I was so worried about you! I thought you had killed yourself!” She said, punching him in the shoulder with each word.
“Ow ow ow! Nice to see you too!” Xephos said sarcastically as he held up his hooves in poor defense.
“Are you happy to see your pony self now?” Lewis whispered to Hannah.
“I don’t act like that do I?” Hannah asked looking at Lewis.
“You never thought I was dead before.” Lewis said.
“Good point.” Hannah said shrugging.
“Is anyone else feeling a tremendous amount of awkwardness hanging in the air?” Simon whispered to the both of them.
“Stay away from us!” Lomadia said, turning to the humans angrily. “I won’t let you hurt him!”
“What did I do!” Simon shouted holding up his hands.
“I think she is hysterical.” Duncan said walking over and sitting in the chair with a now sluggish and sleepy Honeydew in his hands.
“Let him go you monster!” Lomadia said, using her magic to take Honeydew out of Duncan’s grasp and over to her.
“Um Lomadia.” Xephos said tapping her shoulder.
“What?” She asked, turning to look at him.
“They are our hosts.” Xephos said smiling sheepishly. “They are taking care of us while we are stuck here.”
“I thought they were hurting you when I saw Honeydew trying to get away from that monkey.” Lomadia said, pointing a hoof behind her at Lewis.
“Thanks...” Lewis muttered.
“No no no, Honeydew got some Coffee and got all hyper. You know like that time he drank all the soda at the cast party?” Xephos said.
“I remember that, he was acting really crazy.” Lomadia said smiling.
“Yup. Now imagine that, times ten.” Xephos said snickering.
“That’s terrifying.” Lomadia said.
“Tell me about it.” Simon said. “Although it was really funny.”
“But wait, what did you see anyhow?” Xephos asked looking at Lomadia with curious eyes.
“I saw the monkey holding Honeydew while he was trying to get away.” Lomadia said, “I also saw you, between those other two, and I was worried because they looked like they had hurt you.” She said softly, pointing a hoof at Simon and Hannah.
“Oh it’s okay. I wasn’t being hurt. I was just dealing with that.” Xephos said pointing to the snoring Honeydew.
“I can see that now.” Lomadia said laughing.
“We aren’t monkeys, just to let you know.” Lewis said.
“Yeah, they are called Humans. really nice creatures they are.” Xephos said smiling. “Gave us a bed and everything.”
“Thats nice, at least you're ok, the others are probably worried about us though.” Lomadia said, turning to look at the left wall.
“Wait the others? You mean you didn’t go all gung ho and zapped yourself here?” Xephos asked.
“No, I didn’t, I’m not that magical.” Lomadia said, hugging him again.
“Oh alright. so who was the mad pony who-... It was Lalna wasn’t it.” Xephos deadpanned and nuzzling her back.
“Everypony else helped, we were trying to reverse the spell to bring you back.” Lomadia said.
“I see. So that somewhat worked! You are here aren’t you! I guess Lalna can actually make a portal for once!” Xephos said laughing.
“Yes I guess he can, but he couldn’t hold it anymore, so it was disappearing, I didn’t want it to, so I jumped in before it could go away completely so I could save you from the humans.” Lomadia said.
“Wait you just jumped through a closing portal? Don’t you know you can lose limbs by doing that!?” Xephos shouted in sudden protectiveness looking at her with a disappointed expression. “Possibly your life!”
“I didn't know that, but I have all my limbs.” Lomadia said, shaking her legs to demonstrate as she sat down, “I didn’t want to lose you more.”
Xephos just sighed and hugged her again. “Fine, but next time, please don’t do that and spare me a heart attack.” He said chuckling.
“I promise.” Lomadia said, nuzzling into his mane.
“Well this is touching.” Duncan said smiling.
“I think I am going to cry!” Simon said rubbing his eyes a bit.
“That’s really sweet, ain’t it?” Hannah said looking at Lewis.
“Yes it is.” Lewis said smiling.
“So yeah, that’s all we have been doing for the past few days..” Xephos said summing up his long explanation of what they were doing all this time.
“Lalna was freaking out the whole time.” Lomadia said.
“Well we did kinda go out with a bang.” Xephos said chuckling.
“Nilsey said that he killed you with a laser, and Little Wood thought he turned you into a tree.” Lomadia said smiling as she leaned on Xephos and nuzzled him.
“Rythian didn’t try and kill Lalna again did he?” Xephos asked.
“No, but he did shoot a bolt of lightning at him the first time he tried asking him if he saw you.” Lomadia said, remembering what Lalna had told her.
“Huh.... A tree, really?” Xephos said looking at Lomadia with a smile.
“You know how he is with trees.” Lomadia said laughing.
“Yeah, I guess I do.” Xephos said nuzzling into Lomadia. “It’s great to see you again.”
“I missed you.” Lomadia said. That was when the drowsy Honeydew started to wake up, smacking his lips and he sleepily looked around the room.
“Well looks like someone is awake.” Xephos said snickering.
“I see.” Lomadia said smiling as she looked at Honeydew.
“Uhhh...What happened and why am I in the bed?” Honeydew asked, looking around the bedroom.
“You had a crash and then Lomadia jumped through a portal with a bow and slayed the dragon.” Xephos said chuckling.
“There are no dragons... Lomadia!” Honeydew shouted happily as he jumped at her.
“Hello to you too.” Lomadia said, sitting up.
“What are you doing here?” Honeydew asked.
“Long story.” Lomadia said.
“Really long story.” Xephos said laughing.
“Alright.” Honeydew said, sitting down.
“So... Should we show Lomadia what we did for fun while we were here?” Xephos said smiling at Honeydew.
“Yes!” Honeydew said excitedly.
“Then let’s go ask Lewis and Simon if we can use that weird box thing!” Xephos said hopping up and jumping off the bed. “Come on Lomadia!” He said as Honeydew followed after.
“You're both like little colts.” Lomadia said smiling as she trotted after them.
“That is disgusting.” Lomadia said, putting a hoof over her mouth as she watched the axe take the human’s head off.
“Don’t worry Miss cat lady.” Xephos said nudging her. “It gets better.”
“I don’t see how, considering I’M NEXT!” Lomadia yelled as she tried to make her character run but couldn't.
“Just wait for it.” Xephos said smiling.
“Don't follow the guard.” Honeydew said as the dragon attacked and Lomadia ran wildly in circles, not knowing what to do.
“Into the tower! Into the tower!” Xephos laughed as he watched her flail about.
“Ok!” Lomadia said as she quickly ran into the tower. She stopped on the stairs as the dragon let loose fire that went close to her. “That was close.”
“She is going better than you.” Honeydew said, looking at Xephos.
“Well I can’t help it if I see a dragon screaming fire at me and want to run away!” Xephos huffed crossing his hooves.
“Don't be so grumpy.” Lomadia said as she started looting jail cells.
“You haven’t been here when he is gloating.” Xephos pointed out. “Or slashing humans bodies to see the blood come out of their pants instead of where he is slashing.”
“That is weird.” Lomadia said.
“Try telling him that.” Xephos snickered. “It drove Lewis mad!”
“No it didn't.” Honeydew argued.
“He was facehoofing so much!” Xephos laughed as he clutched his sides.
“Simon said he always did it himself.” Honeydew said.
“Oh whatever.” Xephos said snickering. “Let’s just continue watching Lomadia play. She is getting a lot farther than we did in the beginning.”
“It would be a lot easier if this game didn't have gibberish writing.” Lomadia grumbled.
“I know, but they told us that is just how Humans write their script. We speak the same, but we don’t write the same.” Xephos said shrugging.
“That doesn't make much sense.” Lomadia said, scrunching up her nose.
“Does the fact that you are playing on a electronic device in an alternate dimension being’s home make any sense?” Xephos asked looking at her.
“Fair enough.” Xephos said nodding in agreement.
“So what about a portal?” Duncan asked looking at the three ponies as he and the others walked in from the kitchen.
“Portals.” Honeydew said.
“What about them?” Duncan asked again.
“We use them.” Lomadia said, “But they are very difficult to use, a portal is how I got here.” Lomadia stopped the game and saved it before putting the remote down so she could look at Duncan.
“I see... Well I think I have a idea that you three might get a small kick out of.” Duncan said chuckling.
“Oh no, not that game Duncan. It’s so frustrating!” Simon said watching as Duncan walked over to the shelf of game cases and pulled out a certain one by the name of ‘Portal 2’ before putting the disc in the Xbox and walking over to the chair and sitting down.
“Can more than one pony play at a time?” Lomadia asked.
“Why yes they can! You just have to select the Co-op mode.” Duncan said smiling widely as Simon, Lewis, and Hannah all joined the ponies on the couch, forcing Honeydew to sit in Hannah’s lap and Lomadia to sit in front of Xephos and practically use him as a back rest.
“Thats cool... What is the co-op button.” Lomadia asked, scrolling past it a few times as she looked for it.
“That one right there... No the one before. Right there!” Duncan directed. “So who are you playing with?”
“As I said before, we need to teach them how to read english.” Lewis said.
“Lewis, they have been here for what... Four days? Lomadia, not even one. Give them a little time.” Simon said chuckling.
“I know, but they should know what they are saying in some games if they don’t want to get killed.” Lewis said.
“I think I want to see Honeydew and Xephos play first.” Lomadia said, floating her controller over to Xephos after she clicked the co-op option and using her magic to get the second one and give it to Honeydew.
“Okay.” Xephos said grabbing the remote with his magic and resting his head on top of Lomadia’s. “This doesn’t look too hard.”
“Looks like pipes.” Honeydew said. “And...robots being made.”
“Those are going to be you.” Lewis said.
“Sooo... You guys are doing this nowadays?” Xephos asked glancing at Lewis.
“What? Making robots? No.” Lewis said uncertainly. “Not that I know of at least.”
“The little one doesn't like who is making him.” Honeydew observed as he watched the TV as Hannah started petting him.
“Well you can’t win them all.” Simon said watching the opening scene. Honeydew was Atlas and Xephos was P-body, Honeydew sighing a little as Xephos took awhile to pick an element and smiled when he got to pick the wolf. Soon the ponies went through the small details that GLADoS put them through and soon they were on their way to testing as the fell onto the metal flooring with an audible ‘CLUNK!’
“I don’t think I like her.” Honeydew said walking around the room.
“She doesn’t sound very nice, does she?” Xephos said looking around. “Plus she is horrible with home designing.”
“I don't think this is a house Xephos.” Lomadia said.
“Well it still looks awful.” Xephos said rolling his eyes.
“I think its supposed to, what are we doing?” Honeydew asked, walking in circles around the room.
“The same thing you were doing before, solve the room.” Lewis said.
“Okaaaay... That’s helpful.” Xephos said as his ears lowered and his brow furrowed in thought as he looked around the empty room
“There is a lot of white walls.” Honeydew said, putting a portal above him and below him and going through them.
“They are what allows you to put those portals everywhere.” Simon said smiling.
“This is kinda fun.” Honeydew said as he continued going through the portals.
“He is just like you, Simon.” Hannah giggled out as she watched the pony’s screen.
“Oh I do-... Okay maybe yes.” Simon said crossing his arms.
“You did the same thing when we first played.” Lewis said.
“I think I see something over a ledge.” Honeydew said as he fell through the portals.
“Well shoot a portal thingy at it!” Xephos said as he continued inspecting the room.
“This will be hard.” Honeydew said as he shot a portal over to where he saw the ledge, making the top portal disappear and him as well as he went through the one under him. “I’m there, and the door won't open.”
“Alright, gimme a moment to get over there.” Xephos said as he walked over to the portal and jumped through. As he popped over the door suddenly opened as a panel showing several numbers was showing.
“What is this?” Honeydew said, leaning forward on Hannah to look closer almost losing his balance before Hannah caught him.
“That is the thing that lets you select parts of levels after you are done with the current one.” Duncan summarized.
“I don’t understand what you mean by that.” Honeydew said confused as he sat back down on Hannah.
“Um... It’s just easier to see it in action, than it is to explain.” Duncan said shrugging.
“Alright.” Honeydew said, shrugging.
______________________________________________________________________________
When we last left our hero- wait this is the wrong place, time and this isn't a show. The ponies had finished almost half of the puzzles in a few hours, and Honeydew was doing most of the solving.
“Put one of the portals on the left one.” Honeydew said.
“Um.. Okay.” Xephos said as he looked at the wall and placed his yellow portal. “Right there?”
“Yes, now put your other portal over there.” Honeydew said, using the controls to make his robot point to another wall, right next to the doorway.
“Okie dokie.” Xephos said zooming in and placing the portal. Honeydew smiled and put one of his portals next to the one besides Xephos’ then put a portal under him and walked over into Xephos’s portal, appearing next to the door.
“They are doing much better than I thought they would.” Duncan said as he watched the ponies playing the game.
“Yes they are.” Lewis said.
“Do what I did to get here now.” Honeydew said, turning his character to watch Xephos. He simply jumped into the portals before popping out next to Honeydew.
“Hullo!” Xephos laughed as he saw Honeydew’s character.
“Hi!” Honeydew said as he walked through the door.
“So this is all you have done, play games that you cant read.” Lomadia muttered, watching them play.
“Hey it’s entertaining! Even if we can’t read the scribbles.” Xephos said nudging Lomadia.
“I know.” Lomadia said smiling as she lifted her head to nuzzle Xephos.
“Well that was the last part of that level.” Duncan said smiling and laughing. “What do you guys think of this game?”
“I don’t like GLADoS.” Honeydew said.
“Well, I can’t disagree with that, but I will say that I enjoyed the puzzle aspect of it.” Xephos said smiling.
“I liked watching you play.” Lomadia said, turning around to look at Xephos. .
“What, me winning, freaking out, or failing horribly?” Xephos joked as he laughed loudly.
“All of the above.” Lomadia said as she hugged him. Xephos just rolled his eyes and hugged back as he sighed happily.
“I may have said this a million times already, but it is still great to see you again.” Xephos said smiling.
“The feeling is mutual.” Lomadia said.
“Well that is still adorable.” Hannah said chuckling a little.
“I swear to god, you two are just trying to get me to cry.” Simon laughed as Duncan shook his head and made a mocking gag motion before silently laughing himself.
“That was fun even if the robot was trying to get us to hate each other.” Honeydew said as he jumped onto Hannah’s head and lied down. Hannah looked up for a moment before bursting into laughter.
“What are you doin’?” She laughed as she looked up at Honeydew.
“I don’t know.” Honeydew said.
“Well you are just being silly then, you know that?” Hannah said smiling up at Honeydew.
“No.” Honeydew said as he yawned.
“Well it looks like someone is getting rather sleepy huh?” Hannah said chuckling softly.
“It is getting late, and its raining again.” Lewis sighed as he looked out a window.
“Well, nothing we can do right?” Duncan said looking out the window as well. “Stupid weather is stupid.”
“Yep.” Lewis said, turning off the Xbox.
“Anyone want to watch a movie, or shall we all head to bed?” Simon asked yawning a little.
“What's a movie?” Lomadia asked.
“Well... It’s like watching a book happen in real life.” Simon said smiling as he got up and went to the movie shelf. “So we watch a small film?”
“Anything, I don't think it matters.” Lewis said.
“So its like a book being simulated?” Honeydew asked as he jumped off Hannah’s head and onto her lap, before lying down.
“Precisely!” Simon said grabbing a DVD and putting it into the player before walking over and sitting back down.
“Do you think they will come back, or will Lalna kill him?” Sjin asked worriedly as he flew down to the ground.
“Well that all depends.” Rythian said as he looked at the still fuming Lalna run after Sips before he saw him tackle Sips. “Does anypony here want Sips dead?”
“Would making him a tree be considered dead?” Little Wood asked.
“Little wood. Stop with the trees.” Rythian deadpanned as he looked at the green earth pony.
“Its a valid question!” Little Wood defended.
“Is turning him into a tree considered wanting him dead?” Rythian asked.
“He won’t be able to move.” Little Wood said.
“Just... Just be quiet. You are making my brain hurt.” Rythian said putting a hoof to his head.
“Ok... Do you think he would turn him into a plant?” Little Wood said, smirking.
“No. He would most likely blow him up and everything around him.” Zoey said popping up next to Little Wood with a smile. Then she frowned and furrowed her brow. “Wait that’s a bad thing.”
“Who? Oh you mean Pinkie? No no no, she didn’t like the mushrooms. She kept saying they were insulting her even though they were only trying to have a simple argument about th-” Zoey began to rant.
“Zoey, stop what you are doing.” Rythian said looking at the red Unicorn.
“Okay Rythian!... Should we stop Lalna?” Zoey asked.
“The mushrooms...spoke to her...” Toby said.
“Don’t ask.” Rythian said shaking his head.
“I think we should stop the crazy unicorn before he kills Sips.” Little Wood said.
“Okay, Zoey you know what to do.” Rythian said as Zoey nodded and ran over to the two of them before there was some muffled talking in the distance before Lalna got off of Sips and looked around before teleporting as Zoey walked back over smiling.
“All fixed!” She said smiling widely.
“I’m afraid to ask what you did...” Sjin said.
“I just said his groceries were on fire.” Zoey said smiling and shrugging.
“Ok...” Sjin said confused.
“That and that Mushrooms were trying to take over the world!” Zoey said before cackling madly.
Xephos shivered for a moment before looking around. “Why do I feel as if somepony is going insane slowly?”
“Because...Zoey was talking about mushrooms today.” Lomadia said.
“Oh thank Celestia. I thought it was something worse.” Xephos said wiping the sweat from his brow.
“How is Honeydew sleeping through this movie?” Lomadia asked, looking at Honeydew asleep on Hannah’s lap.
“Lomadia. He is Honeydew.” Xephos joked.
“That doesn't mean anything.” Lomadia said.
“Oh says you.” Xephos chuckled quietly before yawning.
“The movie just started and he falls asleep.” Lomadia muttered, looking back to the TV as a shrill scream came up as the TV showed broken down houses smushed together making Xephos and Lomadias’ ears fold back with discomfort.
“Ow...” Lomadia said rubbing one of her ears with a hoof.
“You said it.” Xepho whimpered as he shook his head to clear the ringing sensation that he was getting.
“Sorry! I will turn it down a bit.” Simon said hastily grabbing the remote and turning the T.V. down a few numbers before leaning back in his seat again. While Simon was worrying about the T.V., Hannah was busy poking and prodding the sleepy Honeydew and furrowing her brow in thought.
“Just how much of a deep sleeper is this little guy?” Hannah question as she poked his side making him fidget and snort before going back to his simple quiet and gentle snoring.
“Why are you doing that?” Lewis asked.
“Because he is more of a deep sleeper than Simon on a weekend!” Hannah said prodding Honeydew again.
“Hey! I am not that deep of a sleeper!” Simon huffed.
“Thats why its so easy for me to use him as a teddy bear back home.” Lomadia said.
“I used him as a pillow as well.” Xephos chuckled still rubbing one of his ears with a hoof.
“...Hunger games!” A voice on the TV said. Xephos looked at the T.V. before yipping and clinging to Lomadia in fright.
“Good Luna, that thing is creepy!” Xephos exclaimed.
“Thats a woman.” Lewis said.
“That is a woman!?” Xephos exclaimed again pointing at the screen.
“A lot of makeup.” Lomadia muttered, pushing Xephos off her.
“Yes, she is a woman.” Lewis said.
“Good Celestia....” Xephos said shaking his head.
“Like a Canterlot pony we saw while away.” Lomadia said, watching her pull out names.
“Oh goddess! Don’t remind me!” Xephos said covering his ears and closing his eyes. “She gave me nightmares for a whole week!”
“Ya, I know.” Lomadia said frowning.
“Rose Everdeen!” The lady said smiling, looking at a slip of paper.
“NOOO!” A girl said as guys in white suits picked her up.
“Well that is depressing.” Xephos said watching the film.
“I volunteer!” An older girl yelled as she walked out of the ground, “I volunteer as tribute!”
“Wait what are they volunteering for?... A game?” Xephos asked as his ears perked up.
“A game that involves hunger?” Lomadia suggested.
“It...isn’t a good reason.” Lewis said, watching as the lady congratulated Katniss on volunteering for her sister and the ponies looked in confusion as all the people did a three finger sign.
“So what is with the claw thingy? Are they waving goodbye?” Xephos asked looking at Lewis.
“It’s a sign of respect.” Simon said uncertainly.
“Peeta Mellark!” The lady said excitedly.
“Everypony has weird names!” Lomadia exclaimed.
“Says the pony named ‘Lomadia’.” Duncan retorted.
“Its my name.” Lomadia said.
“And Katniss Everdeen is her’s.” Duncan said pointing to the T.V.
“D-did... Did that guy just stab her with a spear!?” Xephos said, shocked by the scene as the little girl named Rue was speared.
“Yeah..” Hannah said sadly. “I don’t like this scene either.”
“How is this about hunger?” Lomadia asked quietly as she looked down at her hooves as Katniss sang to Rue.
“The name of the movie is a little misleading I guess.” Lewis said.
“Those people are just sick...” Xephos said shaking his head and hugging Lomadia to comfort her.
“Does this actually happen?!” Lomadia asked worriedly.
“Oh no no no! This is just fiction!” Duncan said quickly, shaking his hands in front of him. “Don’t worry, we aren’t taking children and teens to fight against each other in some remote desolate forest.”
“Good, because President Snow acts like a jackflank.” Lomadia sighed relieved.
“Tell me about it.” Simon said shaking his head.
“Why is it that you're always making the ponies scared or sugar high Simon?” Lewis asked, looking at Simon.
“I didn’t know the Coffee would make Honeydew explode in a crazed moment of caffeine induced craziness!” Simon defended.
“We have coffee in Equestria, but we never gave it to him because he might do something crazy, we told him it doesn't exist.” Lomadia said.
“I see... Well that explains a lot then.” Simon said leaning back in his seat.
______________________________________________________________________________
“Well...this whole thing was interesting...” Lomadia said weakly as the movie ended.
“Yeah...” Simon said before yawning as Duncan stood up and stretched. He sighed and said his goodbyes before heading to the door and waving before heading out and going home.
“I guess it’s time for bed.” Xephos yawned out as he sleepily leaned against Lomadia while Hannah was passed out leaning against Lewis for support while Honeydew slept in her lap.
“Terrifying...” Lomadia muttered as she used her magic to pick up Honeydew and got off the couch.
“Goodnight Lewis and Simon.” Xephos said yawning again as he hopped off the couch and began to sleepily trot to the guest room with Lomadia holding Honeydew with her magic.
“Night Xephos and Lomadia.” Simon said standing up.
“Night.” Lewis said as he picked up Hannah and started bringing her to her room.
“Good night Lewis.” Simon muttered as he walked over and into his room.
“Night.” Lewis muttered as he went to his bed.
Of Ponies and Jaffas
By: Pen Brush and Slayerbrony
The next day came around with Lomadia already awake with a worried expression on her face as she stared intently at a wall when Xephos woke up.
“Hey, what’s up with you?” Xephos asked with a small yawn as he rose out of bed. Lomadia shook her head and looked at Xephos.
“Nothing, I’m just...thinking.” She said frowning.
“Well you are doing more than thinking if you are awake this early in the morning with a frown on your face.” Xephos chuckled as he scooted next to her. “So what’s wrong?”
“Its just...if the humans can make a movie like that then they can actually do that to their foals and they wouldn’t care.” Lomadia said. “Even if it is ‘fiction’ they can make it real.”
“Well let me ask you this. If it was real, wouldn’t we have seen any evidence by now?” Xephos asked.
“Maybe it hasn’t happened now, but it could, we can’t trust them, there is something they are hiding.” Lomadia said.
“Lomadia, if they were going to have done something to us, they would have already done it.” Xephos said looking at her.
“We can’t trust them.” Lomadia said convinced.
“Fine, you believe what you want. I think they are nice ponies that were kind enough to give us a roof over our heads. Now if you don’t mind, I am going back to sleep.” Xephos said as he laid back down on the pillows and covered up. Lomadia sighed and shook her head, before looking up at the ceiling.
“Fine, I’ll give them the benefit of a doubt, but only because you trust them.” She said as she lied next to Xephos.
“Thank you.” Xephos said with a small chuckle before hugging her and falling asleep.
______________________________________________________________________________
“Xephos wake up! We are going with Simon and Lewis today!” Honeydew said excitedly as he jumped on Xephos. The maroon unicorn swatted him away while mumbling something incoherently.
“Where exactly is that?” Lomadia asked confused. Xephos groaned and sat up before scratching his head and rubbing his eyes.
“It’s the place me and Honeydew were dropped when I teleported...” Xephos mumbled before leaning against Lomadia and passing out again.
“I’m getting the water bucket.” Lomadia muttered as she used her magic to make a water bucket appear and spill it on Xephos.
“GAAH!” Xephos shouted as he leaped out of bed and landed on the floor before standing up and glaring at the two of them behind his drenched mane. “What the hay you guys!?”
“I didn’t do anything!” Honeydew said as he jumped off the bed.
“Honeydew, have you woken them ye-” Lewis said opening the door and coming into the room before stopping and looking at the drenched unicorn, “When did you get a water bucket?” He asked Honeydew.
“I didn't.” Honeydew said.
“Lewis! Are the ponies up yet? We have to-... Why is Xephos drenched and there is a bucket next to Honeydew?” Simon asked as he walked into the room.
“I woke him up with water, usually wakes him up.” Lomadia said shrugging before she got off the bed as well and magicked away the bucket.
“Ah... Well I’ll grab him a few towels then.” Simon said walking out of the room.
“Great, I’m freezing right now...” Xephos muttered as he shivered.
“You know how I feel now after being in the washing machine.” Honeydew said laughing.
“What?” Lomadia asked, looking at Xephos then at Honeydew.
“Long story...” Xephos said waving a hoof as simon came back with a large towel and wrapped it around him as Simon began to dry him the best he could.
“Awww, your so fuzzy Xephos!” Lomadia said smiling as she nuzzled his face once Simon took the towel off him.
“Yeah yeah.” Xephos said with a small blush lining his cheeks as he returned to gesture. “Alright, now that we are not being drenched in water, Lomadia, what is going on today?”
“Oh... Alright.” Xephos said before shaking himself and letting his fur go back to normal before looking at Lomadia. “There is just one problem... Lomadia hasn’t been in a car yet...”
“A what?” Lomadia asked.
“It’s not really important, we need to have a way to bring you guys to the car without anyone seeing you, thats the real problem.” Lewis said.
“We could get in the big bag again.” Xephos suggested.
“Duncan took it, so we don't have it.” Lewis said.
“Oh... So what’s the plan then?” Xephos asked looking up at Lewis.
“Ask Simon.” Lewis sighed. All the ponies and Lewis looked at Simon while he was holding a damp towel and looking confused.
“Um... What?” He asked blinking.
“Do you have an idea to get us to your workplace?” Xephos asked as Simon threw the towel out the door and put a hand on his chin.
“Well... We could put you guys in a briefcase... Nah, that won’t work. Too big.” Simon said tapping his chin. “Why not just say their plushies?”
“I would rather not do that again.” Honeydew said.
“I guess that is true.” Simon said scratching his chin. “Why not just um.... Put them in a backpack?”
“That might work, we will have to take the laptop out first.” Lewis said.
“That is true... We can just carry it in our arms and say that there is other stuff in the bag.” Simon said smiling before furrowing his brow.
“And what will we say is in the bag?” Lewis asked.
“Never mind that, what is more important is how are we going to fit two full sized ponies into that bag. A pony and a mini pony sure, but all three?” Simon said looking at Lewis. “We are gonna need more bags.”
“We have fit into smaller...sadly.” Lomadia said, looking at the floor.
“Ah... Well. Still, two bags would probably be the best course of action.” Simon said nodding.
“What other bag do we have?” Lewis asked.
“Well.... I guess we could put Honeydew in a satchel. Or Xephos or Lomadia could fit in it and the other two in the backpack.” Simon said looking off as he thought.
“Do we get to choose which bag we go in?” Honeydew asked. Lewis had asked Hannah to grab the bags as she walked by the door and she came back with the satchel and backpack and set them on the ground.
“So why did you guys need these again?” Hannah asked looking at Lewis and Simon.
“To put the ponies in so no one would see them.” Lewis sighed. “I thought Simon would have a better idea than that.”
“Hey! You weren’t thinking of anything!” Simon defended.
“Because you said that you had an amazing idea before we even came in here!” Lewis said.
“Still didn’t think of anything better.” Simon retorted as he took the supplies and laptop out of the bags. “So how are we going to do this?” He asked looking at the ponies.
“Um... I guess one of us is going to hold Honeydew and the other is going to have to go in the satchel... So it’s up to you two I guess.” Xephos said looking at Lomadia and Honeydew.
“You go with Honeydew in the bag, I'll go in the satchel I guess.” Lomadia said shrugging.
“That’s a good plan to me.” Honeydew said.
“Okay, you sure?” Xephos said fidgeting with worry for a moment.
“I’m sure Xephos.” Lomadia said, walking over to him and nuzzling him to calm him down. Xephos just sighed and nuzzled back before turning to Simon.
“Well alright then... Hop on in I guess.” Simon said opening the satchel and laying it on the ground. Lomadia trotted over to it and jumped in before sitting down and waiting. Simon just smiled before gently grabbing the flap and pulling it over her and pulling up the sides making it look like it was simply a filled-to-the-brim satchel. “That works, I guess. Her horn is a bit of a problem.” Simon said pointing to the horn sticking out of the side.
“I’ll lie down then.” She said, before her horn disappeared from the side. Simon just chuckled and opened up the backpack.
“Now here is the difficult part...” Simon said looking from the ponies to the bag. “Um... I guess the easiest way to do this... Is Xephos goes in first, then Honeydew just kinda hops in with him.”
“Alright...” Xephos said unsure as he walked over and crawled into the bag before moving around a bit before settling. “Okay... Done I guess...”
“My turn!” Honeydew said, trotting towards the bag. Honeydew jumped into the bag and lightly smacked into Xephos making him grunt a bit before he moved around a bit and practically curled into a ball and settled down.
“Alright... Lewis you get the backpack.” Simon said as he gently picked up Lomadia in the satchel and slipped it over his head and onto his shoulder.
“Got it.” Lewis said, picking up the backpack and putting it onto his back, grunting a bit at the weight but not too bad.
“So just to the car then?” Simon said smiling.
“Unless you want to walk there.” Lewis said.
______________________________________________________________________________
Soon Lewis and Simon were walking into the Yogtower when Xephos and Honeydew began to kick and fidget to get more comfortable in the small cramped space that the backpack had.
“Stop kicking me.” Honeydew muttered as he tried moving away from Xephos.
“I can’t help it, this bag is too small!” Xephos whispered as he fidgeted a bit more.
“This is about as fun as the other bag...” Honeydew said.
“Hey, at least we could have lied down in that other bag.” Xephos retorted.
“You could, I had to lie on you.” Honeydew said.
“You say it like it’s a bad thing.” Xephos said rolling his eyes.
“Not a lot of room for me, plenty for you, so it was a bad thing.” Honeydew said.
“You are smaller than me! How does that even work?” Xephos said chuckling slightly.
“I don't know.” Honeydew said.
“... Neither do I...” Xephos shifted a bit so he was peeking out the top of the bag and began to call out to Lomadia. “Hey, Lomadia! Hey!”
“You don’t have to yell!” Lomadia yelled back.
“Sorry... You good over there? “Xephos asked.
“I’m fine.” Lomadia said. Xephos only nodded and slumped back down in the bag.
“Hey Lewis! Are we there yet?” Xephos asked.
“Yes we are, you can get out now.” Lewis said, shrugging the backpack off and accidentally dropping it on the ground, “Sorry.”
“Ow...” Was the unison answer as the two ponies opened the bag and crawled out while Simon put Lomadia on the ground gently and opened the flap.
“Thank you.” Lomadia said as she walked out of the bag. Simon only nodded and looked around the office that they were standing in before stretching his arms out.
“Well this is a nice place to chill out until we all go home. This is Lewis’s office as well as mine, so one of us are always going to be here.” Simon said as he looked at the desk with the computer and the other items that littered the office.
“Its messy.” Lomadia said.
“To be fair, it is almost always messy.” Simon said as he swiped a few wrappers and empty boxes into the trash can.
“Because of you.” Lewis said.
“Hey, I only had a few jaffas.” Simon defended as he put a few more boxes into the trash. “Okay, maybe a few more than a few.”
“I don’t think it really matters.” Honeydew said, walking around the room.
“Yeah, least there are small benches to lay on.” Xephos said trotting over to a bench and jumping onto it before laying down.
“They don't look comfortable.” Lomadia said, trotting over to the bench Xephos was on.
“Eh, nothing ever looks comfy till you sit on it.” Xephos chuckled.
“True.” Lomadia admitted, jumping up next to him and snuggling against him, “It is soft.”
“Told you so.” Xephos joked as he nuzzled Lomadia.
“You did.” Lomadia agreed smiling as she nuzzled him back.
“Are ponies always so lovey?” Lewis whispered to Simon.
“Maybe? You will have to ask Hannah about that.” Simon replied shrugging. “Maybe it’s just a pony thing to be so close. Or the fact that they haven't seen each other in a few days, along with being worried sick, that might be it.”
“Maybe.” Lewis said, watching as Honeydew jumped up on the other side of Xephos and lied down. Xephos nudged Honeydew playfully with his nose and chuckled lightly as the litte pony rolled on his side in surprise and confusion.
“Hay! What was that for?” Honeydew asked as he laid back down.
“I did it because you're silly.” Xephos chuckled as he ruffled Honeydew’s mane.
“You’re silly!” Honeydew yelled as he pushed Xephos back.
“No, you!” Xephos said sticking his tongue out at Honeydew and giving him a small push back.
“You!” Honeydew laughed as he pushed him back, while Lomadia put her head down and rolled her eyes.
“Oh come here you!” Xephos said as he grabbed Honeydew with his arm and held him in place with he noogied the little pony, both laughing the entire time.
“Lively little group aren’t they?” Simon said chuckling.
“Yes they are.” Lewis said.
“You had enough?” Xephos joked as he held the panting little pony in his arms.
“No.” Honeydew said as he got his head out of Xephos’ grasp and jumped on him, holding his neck.
“Oi! No free rides you!” Xephos laughed as he stood up and shook to try and get him off.
“You can never shake me!” Honeydew said, tightening his grip on Xephos’s neck.
“Why do I feel as if this is going to end badly?” Simon said rolling his eyes as he walked over and sat down in the chair.
“It might.” Lewis muttered.
“Thats enough you too.” Lomadia said, sitting up and using her magic to detach Honeydew from Xephos and put him on the bench. .
“Oh fine. Party pooper.” Xephos said playfully sticking his tongue out at Lomadia as she laughed.
“You were turning blue.” Honeydew said laughing.
“Yeah yeah, whatever.” Xephos said rolling his eyes before shifting a bit. “I do need to use the bathroom...”
“Me too...” Honeydew said sheepishly.
“Well...” Lewis said turning to Simon. “You want to lead them?”
“No.” Simon said.
“We can find it ourselves.” Honeydew said.
“You sure?” Simon said looking at the orange pony.
“Pretty sure.” Honeydew said.
“Okay then. Just um, go down the hall and to the left.” Simon said. “And please make sure no one sees you.”
“We will Simon. Come on Honeydew!” Xephos said as he hopped off the bench and put Honeydew on his back with his magic before trotting out the door.
“Which way down the hall did they say?” Honeydew asked once they began walking. They ducked under a few tables and hid behind a few other miscellaneous pieces of furniture.
“Um... Down the hall and to the.... Right?” Xephos said unsure as he looked at the two walkways of the hallway.
“That sounds about right.” Honeydew said.
“Should we go back and ask?” Xephos said looking up at Honeydew.
“No.” Honeydew said.
“Oh alright... Right it is.” Xephos said as he walked to the right. They continued to walk until they found a door with a large red sign above it. “I guess that is the sign for a bathroom...”
“That’s a weird sign for something like that.” Honeydew remarked.
“It’s also weird they have boxes that give entertainment with the click of a button.” Xephos quipped as they walked over to the door.
“Ya...” Honeydew said.
“Um... Can you push that thing?” Xephos said as he looked up at the rectangular button that was halfway up the door.
“I'll try.” Honeydew said, before standing on his hind legs while on Xephos’ back and leaned closer to the button, pushing it. The door opened and the two slightly tumbled out the door before they found themselves in a dark and damp alleyway.
“... I don’t think this is the bathroom, Honeydew.” Xephos said as he looked around.
“Was it the dumpsters that told you this?” Honeydew asked sarcastically.
“Oh hush up you, we need to get back I-” Xephos was cut off by the sound of a door slamming shut behind them. “... Oh bollocks.”
“We should have kept the door open.” Honeydew sighed. Xephos turned around and lit up his horn before trying to pry the door open, grunting a few times before sighing and sitting on his haunches in defeat, making Honeydew slide down onto the ground.
“Damn it... I told you we should have gone back and asked!” Xephos said.
“I'm sorry!” Honeydew said as he walked out from behind him and sat next to him.
“Oh it’s okay. We both had to go.. At least you didn’t do pee on me.” Xephos said shaking his head.
“Yes...thats helpful.” Honeydew said, his ears going back against his head.
“Well... You can go in the corner while I try and think of a plan.” Xephos said pointing down the alley way.
“I’ll...do that.” Honeydew said, walking over to a corner. After about a half hour of thinking, yelling, and using the loo in the corner of the alley, it was reduced to Xephos banging his head against the door, slowly and rhythmically.
“Open... Open... Open... Open...” Xephos chanted with the beat of his head hitting the door.
“You're going to hurt yourself.” Honeydew said, “And possible go insane.”
“If getting thrown into another dimension didn’t make me go insane, then I don’t think this will...” Xephos said before going back to his head pounding.
“Dear Celestia...did you notice that dogs are looking at us?” Honeydew asked, looking at the opening to an ally to see a small white poodle, a doberman and a boxer. Xephos slowly turned his head to see the dogs before sighing.
“Nothing can ever be easy, can it?” He muttered. The poodle walked closer, leaving the other dogs at the entrance, and she walked over to Honeydew and barked.
“Hello to you too.” Honeydew said.
“... I don’t even want to know...” Xephos muttered before going back to his head pounding. “As long as I am not getting mauled, it is okay with me.” The poodle barked again and Honeydew chuckled nervously.
“Would you like to get mauled, or would you like to listen.” Honeydew said.
“I am listening.” Xephos said as he stopped and looked at Honeydew and the poodle. The poodle barked three times and looked at Xephos. “Whaaat is he or she saying?”
“The poodle is a girl, and she said ‘you have my pup, I am taking him back’ and I don't understand... whhha!” Honeydew said as the poodle took him in her mouth and ran off with him, as the other two dogs ran with her.
“Ah what the tartarus is this worlds problem!” Xephos yelled before he ran after the group of dogs. “Get back here with my pony!”
“Guys, how long have those two been gone?” Simon asked as he looked up from his computer and at the clock above the door.
“Thirty minutes, i'm worried.” Lomadia said.
“They probably got stuck in the bathroom.” Lewis said.
“But Xephos has magic doesn’t he?” Simon said.
“Yes, he does.” Lewis said.
“So couldn’t he open the door himself?” Simon asked.
“Yes.” Lewis sighed.
“So that only leaves a few options. Either someone has found them, they are lost in the tower, or... Uh oh.” Simon muttered as he facepalmed.
“What?” Lomadia asked.
“Nothing nothing.” Simon said waving his hand dismissively.
“Tell me!” Lomadia said, jumping off the bench.
“No, it’s fine. It’s a silly idea.” Simon said waving his hand again.
“Just tell her.” Lewis said.
“Okay fine. What I was thinking is they may, or may not, have found the exit door instead of the bathroom... And since they can’t read human script...” Simon trailed off.
“I have to find them, I can’t lose them again!” Lomadia said panicking as she started running for the door. Simon quickly hopped up and picked her up by the barrel before holding her up.
“You can’t go out there too! We can’t lose all three of you at once!” Simon said as he walked back to the bench.
“I don’t care!” Lomadia said struggling, her horn starting to glow. Simon slowly began to panic before he put her down and held onto the top of her horn trying to keep her in place. Making the glow go away instantly and her wince. “Ow!”
“Oh sorry! Didn’t mean to do that.” Simon said sympathetically.
“You can't hold her like that forever Simon.” Lewis said.
“Then what do you think I should do? I can’t let her go, cause she’ll run out into the city and we won’t find any of them.” Simon said looking at Lewis while he held the unicorn in place.
“Use something else.” Lewis suggested. Simon thought for a moment before his expression perked up.
“Check my desk drawer, bottom one on the left.” Simon said as he nodded to the desk.
“Are you thinking of food now?” Lewis asked as he went to the drawer.
“Well, I am hungry, but no. Just open the bloody drawer.” Simon said rolling his eyes.
“Alright, Jesus.” Lewis said, opening the drawer, “What is it that you want in here, there are empty boxes and tinfoil, why do you keep tinfoil?” Lewis asked.
“Keeps my jaffas fresh when I lose their boxes. Just tear off a sheet and bring it over here, I have a idea.” Simon said.
“Alright.” Lewis said, ripping some tinfoil off and bringing it over to Simon, who was still holding the tip of Lomadia’s horn.
“Alright, now hold onto her for me please.” Simon said as he knelt down next to Lomadia.
“This will be fun.” Lewis muttered as he picked Lomadia up and held her. Simon just let go of her horn before taking the sheet of tin foil and gently wrapping it around Lomadia’s horn and then taking a step back from the fidgeting unicorn.
“There, I think that did it’s job.” Simon said smiling.
“This accomplishes what?” Lewis asked as he let Lomadia go.
“If I am correct, she shouldn’t be able to use magic now.” Simon said as he sat in his chair.
“And you're thinking this will work how?” Lewis asked.
“Well, movies, theories, and just the fact that me touching her horn was able to stop it, made me think it could work. And it seems to be doing it’s job.” Simon said pointing at Lomadia, who was trying to use her magic but was unable to.
“That is just luck on your part.” Lewis said.
“Oh hush up. You are just embarrassed I was actually able to do something.” Simon said sticking his tongue out at Lewis.
“Not really.” Lewis said. Lomadia started shaking her head to try and get the tinfoil off.
“I think one of us should go out and try to find those ponies. Maybe Duncan can help you search.” Simon said looking at Lewis.
“Grrrr.” Lomadia said as she ran at the door and slammed into it, falling onto the floor.
“Ow...” Simon winced as he watched the pony fall to the ground. There were a few footsteps outside the door before it opened up to show Sips peeking in.
“Hey Simon, what was that noi-...” He stopped when he looked down. “.. What fuck is this shit?”
“That, didn't hurt.” Lomadia said, before standing up and promptly falling back down dazed.
“Simon, Lewis! Why do you have a drunk, talking pony with tinfoil on it’s head in your office!?” Sips shouted at the two other humans.
“She isn't drunk.” Lewis said.
“Well she is something! But why do you have a talking pony in your office!” Sips said.
“It’s a mechanical plushie.” Lewis said quickly.
“Really?” Sips asked looking back down at Lomadia. “That must have cost a shit ton.”
“Yeah, Lewis had to pitch in to help us buy it.” Simon said nodding.
“You are all idiots.” Lomadia said, still lying down.
“Wow, you must have gotten the defective one if it’s saying such mean things.” Sips said chuckling.
“Yeah, we are planning on sending it back.” Simon said smiling.
“I need to find them.” Lomadia said shakily as she got up and started wobbling out the door.
“Well, I will leave you two to play with your pony.” Sips said gently pushing Lomadia back in with his foot, making her lie back down, before walking out the door and closing it.
“That was a close one.” Simon breathed out as Lomadia closed her eyes.
“Yes it was.” Lewis agreed. There was another set of footsteps before the door opened again and Zoey walked in looking around worriedly.
“Is everyone okay in here? I heard someone run into something.” Zoey said.
“It’s fine.” Lewis said.
“Oh okay then- oh my gosh is that a pony!” Zoey said picking up Lomadia and smiling widely at her.
“Um, yea. She just came in today.” Simon said nervously.
“Oh she is just adorable!” Zoey said as she hugged Lomadia before holding her out and looking at her. “Why does she have tinfoil on her head?”
“She was sent that way.” Lewis said, watching Zoey hold the sleeping pony.
“Oh alright, well if everyone is okay then I guess I will go.” Zoey said as she put Lomadia down and walked out before closing the door.
“When did everyone become so hell bent on seeing if we were okay?” Simon asked looking at Lewis.
“When she hit the door.” Lewis said.
“I was pushed.” Lomadia muttered in her sleep.
“Is she alright?” Simon asked as he looked at the pony.
“Would you be ok if you hit your head on a door at full speed?” Lewis asked.
“Good point.” Simon said shaking his head. There was one more knock on the door before it opened up to reveal Sjin standing there with a worried look.
“Hey you guys alright? I heard a loud smash from my office.” Sjin asked as he looked at Simon and Lewis.
“We are fine.” Lewis sighed.
“Oh okay... Why is there a pony with Tinfoil on it’s head in your office?” Sjin asked as he bent down and picked up Lomadia.
“She is just this thing we ordered...” Simon said sighing and rubbing his temples.
“Oh... Well it’s adorable, I’ll say that much.” Sjin chuckled before he walked over and handed Lewis, Lomadia before walking to the door. “Well see you guys. I would stop with the banging though, made a lot of people freak out.”
“Thanks for the advice.” Lewis said as he put Lomadia on the bench.
“Alright, See ya later guys.” Sjin said before he closed the door and left.
“Okay... So now we have to make sure no one else sees Lomadia, then we have to go find Xephos and Honeydew... Greeeeat.” Simon said.
