MLP G5 Anon Pandering Edition

by whatisthis11

Rating: everyone
Tags: Human, Comedy, Adventure
Length: 779

Years after the Princess cornoration, the CMC are called to save Equestria, but alone they are weak. They must band together with three mercenaries and defeat the green menace.

The CMC discover that Princess Sparkle has been Kidnapped and Canterlot is blazing, the Crystal Empire Princess must send her guard to fight army of the green menace in Canterlot, leaving the CMC + Three special mercenaries to save Princess Sparkle and potentially all of ponykind.

The three special mercenaries were picked by anons based on posting numbers, this story caters to these anons and anons like them.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-05-04 23:01:00 UTC

Mercenaries, the Gathering

The CMC were stumped, they hadn't a clue on where to find intimidating mercenaries like the princess desired. They searched all over the city, but to no avail, just when they were ready to give up, a giant humanoid creature approached them, they stared in his glory, until Sweetie Belle blurted out "awww, its such a cute rabbit." Just when the creature was ready to decimate the poor filly, the other two interrupted and proposed their request. "You look like a tough and powerful being. Listen, the princess needs your help, would you be willing to come with us and give her aid?" The creature just stared, and gave a light nod.

Once back at the castle, the princess gazed upon the creature until she stated, "CARL! Its so good to see you again, I see you are looking for more action." The princess gave Carl a hug, and congratulated the CMC on recruiting such a worthy mercenary. The princess ordered them to find two more.

Cheerful after their first find, the CMC continued to roam the city for their second. They went into an odd section of town they have never seen before, or so they thought. It turns out that the CMC actually fell into a sewer without realizing it. After a long venture in the crystal empires sewage, they found a small door, and decide to open it.

What lies inside could never been unseen. Inside the sewage was a giant behemeth of a human, it was obese, and stunk worse than the foulest ordor known to ponykind. They noticed it was playing with pony dolls, until they it realized the existence of the three fillies. It shouted loudly "PONIES ARE REAL!" and proceeded to hug the three unfortunate fillies in its death grip. After a long torturous hug, Scootaloo had the nerve to ask "So what are you exactly?" The creature exclaimed "I AM PURPLE TINKER, QUEEN OF THE BRONY FANDOM," the three fillies wanted to flee the horror, but were to scared to move. Applebloom confused asked "Queen? But you look nothing like a queen, or even a girl" The creature became angry "I AM A GIRL AND YOU WILL REFER TO ME LIKE YOU DO EVERY OTHER GIRL ON THIS PLANET, OR I WILL BLOCK YOU!" The CMC thought the creature was dillusional. Sweetie Belle thought out loud "Boy it really is horrendous." The creature, less angry with the horrendous part of her setence, but more with the "it" exclaimed, "THATS IT YOU ARE GONNA GET BLOCKED NOW!" and attempted to place Sweetie Belle in a death grip. Sweetie Belle barely dodged, and the three ran out of the sewer with the behemoth giving chase, they eventually reached the Pony Princesses castle.

Once in the castle, the creature caught up after three hours, and was exhausted. The princess had already heard of the creature from the CMC and made proposal, "join these fillies, they need a mercenary like you to help all of ponykind." It accepted, to the CMCs dismay.

The Happening

The CMC were relaxing in the crystal empire, it has been several years since the cornoration of Princess Sparkle, but they have yet to earn their cutie marks. They have tried literally everything to earn them, but to no avail, they gave up on them and spent most of their time just hanging around the crystal empire, as their families have been relocated their.

Suddenly, it happened like that, a loud kaboom out of no where. The princess of the crystal empire was stolen away, the CMC thought to themselves "anders." Although the CMC were still technically fillies, anders was really not a threat to them, he was pathetically weak, the guards didn't even take him seriously. The CMC rushed after anders, catching up to him and then tickling him into submission. Anders shouted "THIS WILL BE THE LAST TIME YOU HUMILIATE ANDERS" and ran off crying. The princess thanked the CMC and went back to her castle, however, before the CMC could continue, they noticed something alarming. Princess Sparkle was being kidnapped, all the CMC could see was a green menace flying at speeds faster than a wonderbolt but with only one wing. Scootaloo was all too familiar with what this menace was, fire soon followed the trail of this green menace, they noticed Canterlot was blazing.

They went to warn the crystal empire princess, who would send all her forces to deal with the threat in canterlot, but the CMC were given a different task, they were to find three of the most intimidating mercenaries they could find and report back to the princess.