A Riddle by Nature

Chapter 3: …We Had to Start Running

When I got back to the apartment, I found that Ashley wasn't back yet, so I decided to try to figure out what to do with all the herbs I had bought. Fortunately, it turned out that I didn’t have to. Zecora knew exactly what to do. I was sitting down looking at all the ingredients one minute, and the next thing I knew I was stirring several mixing pots chanting about hoof-rot, and other horse related diseases. Within the hour I had a dozen potions mixed up, two for each common Equine disease.

As I looked over the potions I said “I’ll mix up some more if we get something uncommon; I mean I am becoming Equestria’s shaman”. That was when Ashley got back.

“Hey David did you get everything on your list?” Ashley asked.

I was finishing up the last potion. “Well Ashley I sorta did but first could you hand me that cauldron lid?”

She sighed, “David, I know Zecora made potions but really it’s just a pot.”

I kept stirring, “Well, yes it is, formally, but you make potions in a cauldron normally.”

She paused, “What?”

I sighed, “Look, this brew reacts quite violently with air so I need to put the lid on with care.”

Her eyes got wider as she handed me the lid. “Wait, what? You’re brewing potions in my kitchen? Why?”

I put the lid on the bubbling stew and said, “Well I went to the clinic to get those meds but the ingredients on the back filled me with dread. So I got some herbs from an apothecary and as for the potions well, say lavé.”

She rubbed her temples, “You know what? I should have expected something like this, I mean the ears, the mane, the tail and now you’re acting like Zecora. Not to mention those rhymes, which are giving me a headache.”

I looked up from pouring the brew, which had finally become less…violent and asked, “Do I annoy you with my rhymes? You’ll get used to them in time.”

“Gah!” She exclaimed and stormed out of the room as I finished pouring the potion.

She came back an hour later after I had finished cleaning up. “David I’m sorry I snapped at you before I don’t know what came over me.”

I smiled, “It’s all fine, friend of mine. The exact same thing came over me when I went to the apothecary.”

She smiled, “Alright well, I’m going to bed this whole pony thing is really stressing me out.”

When I woke up the next morning, I immediately knew something was wrong because as soon as I stood up my pants fell off. I ran to the bathroom and pulled down my underpants and saw the problem was that my…well, my male anatomy had completely disappeared.

“Oh great just my luck now what should I say? Oh yeah FFFUUUCCCKKK!!!”

Ashley ran into the room, she must have been tired because she had abnormally heavy footsteps, “David! What’s wro…” she saw my problem and she just stared. “You have a…but you’re a…and that’s just…whaaa?”

I pulled up my pants, which were loose, and said, “You know what? I'm not really that surprised. I expected this when the marks showed up on my thighs.” Then I looked down, feeling depressed, and saw something that made complete sense.

“Look, Ashley, I know we're both in pretty bad moods, but would you please look down at your newly formed hooves.” She looked down and saw that not only did she have hooves, but her legs were covered in yellow fur and had taken on a more Equine form.

“Ok this is not going well I was hoping we would have a few days before something this drastic happened.” Ashley said with fear creeping into her voice. At that point I walked out of the room and she called after me.  “Hey where are you going?”

I walked into Ashley’s room and picked up a pair of her jeans, which I slipped into. “Hey what are you doing?” she asked me.

I rolled my eyes, “Well I’m a girl now apparently and I need some clothes that actually fit me.” She seemed a little perturbed although that got a lot worse when I cut a hole in the back of the jeans which I slipped my tail through, it was now a lot longer than the night before and was striped black and white just like the hair that was now growing on my legs.

“Dude will you stop messing with my clothes?!?” I handed her the scissors.

“While I will stop if it will please thee I suggest that you cut your own tail free.”

She frowned, “I am not mutilating another pair of my pants David.”

“Well of course you don’t have to, there's no need to wail, I understand if you are ashamed of your tail.” She looked a little hurt when I said that.

“What? I’m not...ugh...” She cut a hole in her pants and pulled her now fully formed orange tail out. “Happy now?” I just nodded. "You know what David? your skin is sarting to change color."

In shock, I looked down at my arm and saw that my normally brown skin was now either becoming dark gray or more of a whitish color.

"Oh that just had to happen, now I look just like a striped Michael Jackson."

shley laughed a bit at my attempted humor and asked. "You think anything else changed?"

It didn't take long to discover that our teeth had also changed, and that Ashley now had to small wings sprouting from her back.  “Well I suppose flying will be cool and David I think you should know your face looks a lot more feminine.”

I thought back to yesterday, “Oh how could I not notice this yesterday everyone was calling miss.”

She looked at my head confused, “And David did you pierce your ears?”

I stared back at her thinking she was joking, “What? No! Why would you?...Whoa!” I ran to the bathroom and looked in the mirror and saw holes in both my ears once I got back to the living room I said. “Ok I think I have a plan for these. I’ll fix this problem with plenty of ease.”

I walked into the kitchen and rummaged through one of the bags until I pulled out a pair of gold earrings. Ashley stared at me, “Why did you get those?”

I fumbled with the earrings for a while until I got them into my ears. “Well, yesterday at the store I felt in my heart, that I must have this jewelry in my shopping cart.” I said as I pulled the necklaces and bracelets from my bag and snapped them on.

Ashley looked at me, “David I think you might be taking this a little too far."

I just ignored her and pulled a pair of aviator goggles from the bag. “Oh and Spitfire these goggles look just like yours. I found them in the last of the stores.”

She rolled her eyes, “Look Zecora I appreciate the thought but…wait what did I just say?!”

Ashley and I stared at each other in disbelief. “I called you Zecora and you called me Spitfire! That’s not good I can’t believe this is happening!” She stamped her hoof on the floor resulting in yelling from the people downstairs.

“Whoa there girl! You need to calm down! And please don’t forget that we're not on the ground.” I said, reminding her that there were people living beneath her.

“Alright look I think we need to-” unfortunately that was when the landlord barged into the room.

“Alright that’s it! I've been hearing thumps up here all morning! Now just  what is going…” he stopped once he saw the human-pony hybrids sitting at the table. “I…I’m calling the cops!” He said in pure terror as he slammed the door, I heard a chair being dragged in front of it.

Ashley looked at me with tears in her eyes and said, with horror in her voice “Zecora what do we do?” I noticed the name but at this point I didn’t care.

I stood up, started grabbing things that we’d need and said “Pack up the things that aren't for fun and then we go outside and we start to run.”