Twilight Eats Spike's Meat

by Good Christian Ethesto

Rating: mature
Tags: Sex, Spike, Comedy, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, Human, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark
Length: 3845

When princess Cadence finds a magical portal mirror in the crystal palace's basement, she and princess Celery decide to send Twilight Sparkle in to see where it goes. What Twilight finds on the other side, however, is more than she bargained for

When princess Cadence finds a magical portal mirror in the crystal palace's basement, she and princess Celery decide to send Twilight Sparkle in to see where it goes. What Twilight finds on the other side, however, is more than she bargained for.

Warning: Contains partially consensual insex and borderline food porn. A super swank Equestria Girls crossover
Clop at your own risk

Published 2013-05-14 08:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-05-14 08:20:01 UTC

Clop to the extreme

Princess Celery rubbed her furred chin with the underside of one white hoof, deep in thought. "Well, it certainly is a thing," she commented offhandedly as she inspected the object in front of her.

Princess Cadence nodded furiously in agreement. It was a thing. The problem is, she had no idea what kind of thing it was. That's why she called princess Celery in. She's an expert on all kings of things. "Now the question is; what kind of thing is it?"

"Hmmm," princess Celery wondered out loud. "I have seen a lot of things in my time, but this isn't any of them. It almost looks like a big mirror."

Cadence's eyes widened in recognition. It totally did look like a big mirror! "You're right! I knew I asked you to help for a reason. You're so smart!"

Princess Celery was too busy studying the object to hear the other princess's praise, however. After a few moments, she edged closer and poked at the mirror with a hoof. Her eyes instantly widened in surprise. This was no ordinary-human mirror! Her gold-clad hoof passed right through the glass as though it was some kind of portal. "I think it's some kind of portal!" She called out, repeating what I just narrated.

"A portal?" Questioned Cadence. "A portal to where?"

Princess Celery's eyes narrowed as she continued to search the mirror for clues. Finally, after a few moments, she spoke up, "I'm not sure, but I think I know someone who can help us find out."

--

"Living in Equestria is really swell! Being a pony is the best thing e-e-ever! I have hooves on my arms, and a cutie mark on my ruuuuump!" Sang Twilight Sparkle as she danced around the Ponyville market. The other ponies just ignored her, as breaking out into song was a daily occurrence for the newly crowned 'princess Sparkle'. "If I was anything other than a pony I'd be really upset. Nowhere else is as good as here," she finished as she entered the local deli.

She walked up to the counter and examined the meat cuts under the glass for a moment before addressing the cashier. "I need beef," she stated plainly. An upraised eyebrow from the male pony behind the counter prompted her to be more specific. "Lots of it. And make sure it's veal!"

Seeing this as an acceptable request, the pony scooped up a massive wad of ground beef and deposited it into a brown paper bag before ringing her up. She would have scoffed at the price if she wasn't a rich-ass pony princess. In Equestria, beef is expensive as shit, especially veal, seeing as how cows are sentient creatures. A lot of ponies were against eating them, but Twilight didn't give half a shit about cows. I mean, ponies eat fruit bats, and those are sentient, so why can't she eat sentient meat animals? It was sound enough logic for her.

With a smile on her face, Twilight hopped out of the shop and back towards her swank tree-library-home. She had no plans for the rest of the day, so she was looking forward to laying down in bed with a good book and filling her belly with succulent meat.

"Ooooooooh being a pony is the best thing in the world!" She continued singing. In mere minutes, as Ponyville is a small town, she was back home. Pushing the door open with her amazing unicorn magic, she instantly collided with a frantic Spike who had just run out the door for some reason. The two of them collapsed in a heap, little stars and swirls flying around above their heads as their eyes rotated uncontrollably in their skulls. After a moment, Twilight shook her head, righting her eyes as she gave Spike a stern look.

"Watch where you're going you little shit."

This was enough to break Spike out of his dazed state, and he looked at Twilight in horror. "I'm so sorry mistress Twilight. I-"

He was cut off as Twilight's horn flared with purple magical light and his mouth was forced shut. "I don't want to hear your excuses. You're lucky I'm in a good mood, or I'd consider punishing you."

Spike's eyes widened in fear. The last time she punished him, he couldn't walk right for a week. His anus couldn't take another beating of that magnitude. He let out a sigh of relief as she let go of his mouth and trotted into their home, ignoring him in favor of ogling her brown meat sack.

She walked into the main room, setting the sack down on a table as she plunged her forelegs into it. She could feel the texture of the meat against her tender little hooves as she pulled it out, and she loved it. Her face twisted into a wide smile as she undressed the meat with her eyes, imagining how good it would taste.

"I'm gonna put you in my belly," she whispered seductively as her tongue snakes its way out from between her lips and rubbed against the coarse surface of the meat wad. It tasted exquisite, and she could feel her loins heating up in anticipation of her meal. "I'm gonna eat you all up."

Unfortunately, this forbidden romance between a tiny purple unicorn and the desecrated remains of a baby cow was never meant to be, as Spike saw fit to interrupt. "Mistress Twilight," he squeaked out with all the courage he could muster.

Twilight's left eye twitched in annoyance as she slowly turned her head to look at her dragon slave. "What is so important that you see fit to interrupt my daily meat consumption?! This better be good, or I'm getting out Mr. Pickle."

Spike shuddered at the mere thought of 'Mr. Pickle'. He never wanted to see that thing again... Not after what happened last time... He shook his head, managing to ward away the flashback that was threatening to emerge, and he cleared his throat. "You got a letter from the princess."

Twilight's mouth dropped open in shock. The princess knew better than to interrupt her during her daily meat ingestion period. This must have been really important! She reluctantly put the meat back in its bag, giving it one more long gaze with half-lidded eyes. "Don't think I'll forget about you... I'll return to eat you soon enough. Your fate is sealed."

With that said, she snatched the letter out of Spike's claws with her magic and proceeded to read the fuck out of it. She read it one time. Then she read it two time. She even read it red time and blue time. Finally, she put the letter down on the table and contemplated what she had just read. Apparently princess Celery wanted her and her friends to visit the crystal kingdom for some weird reason. The reason wasn't stated, but whatever it was, the princess made it sound important.

She looked longingly at her meat sack, rubbing a hoof across its side longingly. A solitary tear rolled down her face as she levitated it into the fridge. "I'll be back for you, my love..." She whispered, before calling out to Spike. "Spike! You better not eat my meat while I'm gone!" She would be sooooo mad! Without further adieu, she trotted out the door en route to Rarity's house. It was time to round up all her friends for another adventure, and Rarity lived the closest.

--

"This is it?" Asked Twilight as she examined what looked like a perfectly ordinary-human mirror. Of course, she was wrong. This was no ordinary-human mirror.

"Despite its looks, this is no ordinary-human mirror," stated princess Celery, further emphasizing that it is, in fact, NOT an ordinary-human mirror. "It's actually some kind of portal."

Twilight's eyes widened, now intrigued by this mirror that she would have previously described as 'ordinary-human'. "A portal? To where?"

Princess Celery chuckled nervously. "Yeah, we have no idea where it goes," she admitted. "That's why I asked you to come."

Twilight was confused for a moment, until her colossal brain put all the pieces together. Her eyes narrowed as she gave her mentor, princess Celery, a glare. "You called us here to go into that portal for you, didn't you?"

Now that the gig was up, Celery lowered her head in defeat. "Yes, my loyal student. I couldn't think of anypony more suited for the job and I knew you wouldn't want to pass up such a rare and exciting opportunity such as this."

"We don't even know where this portal goes. For all we know, it could go straight into the realm of nightmare toilets, or something equally as horrifying."

Celery laughed and waved that off with a hoof. "Oh Twilight. You and your imagination. There is no realm of nightmare toilets... Unless you consider Luna's bathroom a realm," she added under her breath. "I'm sure it'll be fine. You and your friends can just go into the portal, do whatever the hell it is you guys do, and then come back and tell me all about it. Perhaps you'll even learn something about friendship along the way."

Now Twilight's posse, who had remained unmentioned until now, decided to insert their opinions. "Not that I'm not flattered at the prospect of going through some demonic gateway into a potentially nightmarish realm of existence, but I have a lot of work that I had to put aside to come here. I don't have time to go on an adventure unless the fate of Equestria is at stake," explained Rarity. As an afterthought she added, "and I need to take care of my little sister while my parents are out of town. I had to hire Mando to foalsit while I was gone, and you know that that's just an accident waiting to happen."

Applejack stepped up next, adjusting her sombrero as she gave an excuse of her own. "Mi familia needs my help kicking thee trees, señora. I need money to send to my relatives over thee border. I already sold all our cheekens to help pay for the farm."

"Yes, what she said." Agreed Rainbow Dash. Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy nodded, eager to get out of helping as well as this just seemed really sketchy to them.

Princess Celery sighed, realizing that they were all just making dumb excuses to get out of helping. No matter, she didn't need them anyway. She only REALLY needed to send one pony through the portal. "Twilight, you may be a princess now, but I'm still your mentor and employer. You're going to go through that portal or I'm going to stop paying you until you do."

Twilight's face stretched into a visage of absolute horror. No money meant no more meat. And no meat meant... No. Twilight refused to even think about life without meat. It looks like Celery had a firm grip on her metaphorical balls. With a heavy sigh, she accepted her fate. At least hopefully she could get this over with quickly. "Fine, I'll go through the portal."

Celery smirked trollishly. "I knew you would see it my way. No go on, your fate awaits you." She gestured her student towards the mirror with a hoof as she pulled a freshly cooked pork chop from the compartment in her tail and began sniffing it. She salivated in anticipation as she finally poked her tongue out and dragged it across the meaty surface. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head as she 'mmmd' in pure bliss. Porkchops were exquisite, and this particular one was of the finest quality. "I'm going to touch myself later tonight to the memory of your amazing taste," she whispered seductively to her pork chop.

Twilight rolled her eyes as she walked up to the huge mirror portal. It was easily three times her height and twice her width. She poked the surface with a hoof, feeling her appendage slip through as though she was touching water.

"You'll soon know more about this place than even I do," stated Celery from the other side of the room. Twilight ignored her, though. Celery was always saying cryptic shit like that, and half the time it was neither relevant nor did it make any sense.

Deciding that she might as well just get it over with, Twilight entered fully into the portal. She was suddenly being sucked around in a whirling, colorful vortex. Her greatest fears had manifested themselves! She was in the realm of nightmare toilets! Oh the horror! "AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" She screamed as she continued to swirl. Then everything went dark.

--

"Ugh," Twilight grunted as she woke up. Her head felt as though she had just faced a lvl 9 samus in super smash bros melee, and obviously lost. She pushed herself up slightly and opened her eyes, only to see that she was no longer in a swirling vortex of doom. Instead she seemed to be in a building of some kind. Looking around, Twilight's heart dropped in her chest. "No... Not just any building... A high school..."

Twilight dreaded high school. Last time she went to one she was constantly bullied for being a massive nerd. It was the worst! She looked around, noting that the lights were fairly dim, and everything seemed to be covered in a thin layer of goo. This was the weirdest high school she'd ever been to, but at least it was better than the realm of nightmare toilets. Also, since there was no one around she could just leave without getting picked on at all.

She attempted to get up onto her hooves, but found that to be impossible as she no longer had hooves. No, instead she had hands, and little deformed feat covered in purple boots. She inspected the rest of her body and found herself equally not a pony no matter where she looked. The horror! At least she was magically fully clothed somehow. Or perhaps not at least, depending on how you want to look at it... You fucking perverts.

Thankfully, Twilight knew just what to do in this situation, and instead of panicking, she took a few deep breaths. "Okay, I'm a weird creature in a weird place..." That summed her situation up quite nicely. "Well, I went through the portal just as Celery asked, now I can go back and tell her all about it."

As she finished talking to herself, a loud clack echoed down a nearby hallway as though something had been dropped. Twilight's head instantly turned towards the source of the noise, eager to see what it was. What she saw made her almost wish she hadn't looked. Just halfway down the hall was what looked like a massive, gray fly. She stared at it in fear, and was disturbed to find that it seemed to be regarding her as well with its large, red, segmented eyes.

After a few tense moments, Twilight was considering just running away, when the fly suddenly shot down the hall at her, its huge wings allowing it to travel at nearly sonic-rainboom-inducing speeds. Within a blink of an eye, it was on top of her, pinning her wrists down with its own appendages.

Twilight screamed in shock, struggling in an attempt to pull her wrists free. The fly was too strong, though, and it lowered its head and whispered in her ear. "I'm going to rape you."

Her mouth dropped open in disgust. "What! Don't do that!" Speaking was a mistake, though, as the fly used this as an opportunity to ram his proboscis into her open mouth. The slime coated member, slid into the back of her throat, causing her to gag. The fly simultaneously began groping her newly acquired breasts through her shirt with his free legs. he used the tiny leg claws to rub her nipples, playing them like tiny violins.

Twilight tried struggling to the best of her ability, but it was as though she was being raped by Silver the hedgehog (It was no use). She even tried using her magic, but apparently her new body didn't have a horn, so that didn't work. With no way to escape, she was completely at the fly's mercy.

The fly moaned loudly as it pressed its body into hers, rubbing its furry abdomen against her meaty thighs. Normally, Twilight wouldn't mind being touched there, but not like this... Not like this...

His antennae began feeling through her hair as his proboscis probed her mouth, filling every crevice with his fly juices. Lifting her skirt out of the way with one leg, he began grinding his abdomen into her swimsuit area, causing her to involuntarily moan, despite the huge thing in her mouth.

Then she was completely shut up as the proboscis once again pushed its way into her throat, this time going even further than before. It started writhing, and Twilight's eyes widened as a thick liquid oozed out the end directly into her throat. Her horror only grew as her knowledge of flies allowed her to assume the thing was vomiting into her mouth. She was completely grossed out, but she couldn't do anything as the fly had her held tight.

After a few moments, she was starting to run out of air as the proboscis was completely blocking her esophagus. Then, he mercifully pulled it out of her throat, letting it once again dangle in her mouth as it continued to drip digestive enzymes onto her tongue. She wanted to take a deep breath, but her gag reflex had other plans. The combination of how disgusting the situation was, the thing in the back of her throat, and the awful taste made her retch as a fountain of throw up flowed up her throat and into her mouth. Unfortunately, it had nowhere to go, as the thick proboscis was blocking its only exist, and it was only able to escape in a thin stream that traveled down her chin.

Then there was a horrid slurping sound, and Twilight felt the mixture of her stomach acid and the fly's own chyme getting sucked out of her mouth through the straw-like proboscis. The fly once again moaned in ecstasy as it continued to slurp the vile concoction from her mouth like some sort of unholy milkshake. After what seemed like forever, the fly pulled its proboscis out and rubbed it across her cheek affectionately.

"Delicious," it whispered as it continued grinding itself into her. Despite her disgust, she just couldn't fight that feeling anymore, and she began to get a little wet in her no-no-zone. She once again moaned, feeling her girly parts growing moist. Unfortunately, it simply wasn't meant to be. The fly pulled away from her just before she reached the breaking point, and without another word, flew off down the opposite hallway.

Twilight laid there panting and confused, now covered in goo. "What a cock tease," she mumbled to herself. After a few moments, she pushed herself to her knees and turned around to the mirror just a few feet away. She had no idea what the fuck just happened, but all she cared about right now was leaving this shitty place. She briefly pondered whether or not the realm of nightmare toilets would have actually been a preferable destination to this as she crawled through the mirror.

The swirling color maelstrom that she was met with made her disregard those foolish thoughts.

Moments later, she was back in Equestria, and more importantly, back to being a pony. Being a pony was the best, and Twilight didn't intend to not be a pony ever again. She looked around, instantly spotting both princess Celery and Cadence as well as all her friends not too far away.

Seeing her return, Celery smiled and walked over. "That was quick, what did you find on-"

She stopped speaking as Twilight ripped loose a huge chunk of crystal from the wall and used it to bash in the edge of the mirror. A few strike was all it took before the border of the mirror snapped and the whole thing shattered as though it had been a regular mirror all along.

Twilight turned back to Celery, a crazed look in her eye and viscous goo covering most of her body. "NEVER AGAIN!" Without even waiting for any of them to ask any questions, Twilight turned and ran out of the room, eager to get back home. Once she was outside the palace, her horn flared up and she teleported, using a massive amount of magic to instantly appear hundreds of miles away in the living room of her house.

She let out a relieved sigh, glad to be home after such a stressful day. She was even more glad that she could finally eat her meat. It was all she could think about as she walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge. What she saw shocked her. Or rather, what she didn't see. Her meat was gone!

A munching behind her alerted her of the other presence in the room, and her head slowly turned a full 180 degrees on its axis until she was looking over her back at Spike. Spike was sitting at the table looking back at her with a nearly-empty brown sack in his claws.

Twilight's voice was unusually calm as she slowly asked, "Spike, is that my meat you're eating?"

Spike looked down at the bag, then slowly back to Twilight. His irises shrunk to pinpricks as fear overtook him. "Th-this was y-your meat?" He stuttered out.

That was all the answer Twilight needed. Her horn flared up as she grabbed Spike in her magical aura. She needed meat and she needed it now! She pulled him close to her face as she smelled his dragoney musk. It was intoxicating. Surely all those gemstones she constantly fed him had kept him quite healthy. No doubt his meat would be exquisite. She gently slid the tip of her tongue into his ear hole, before saying, "I'm going to eat your skin."

Spikes panicked and tried to flail, but Twilight's magical aura was too stronk for him, and his mouth was held shut so he couldn't scream. It looks like this is the end for Spike.

--

A few hours later, Twilight lay on her bed, contently rubbing her belly which was now filled with meat. It had been a hectic and weird day, but now that she had her meat Twilight was able to relax. "Maybe I should write that letter to the princess after all," she said to herself. Levitating a quill and scroll from a nearby desk she got to work.

Dear Princess Celery,

Today I learned that rape is an important part of friendship. Sometimes all a friend really needs is to get raped. Even if they are too scared to ask, a good friend always knows when another friend needs to be raped.

Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle

The end.