Dreams.

They are funny things at times. They are ways to remember. A bridge to the unconscious mind. Inhibitions are lost, the true self revealed. But also, they are terrible nightmares, plaguing a person by their guilt or past failures.

Kratos woke up, looking around. Apparently he’s not tormented by dreams, being caught in a dream state for days on end. In fact, he’s had the best sleep in years. Was that due to the wine? “I lust for flesh,” he mumbled. “Tender and soft flesh,” he mumbled. Twilight’s eyes narrowed into dots, looking at his face. “I would lick it clean, and use my bare hands to tenderize it...”

“Stop talking!” Twilight shouted. “Wake up!”

At the sudden yell, Kratos fell off of the couch he laid on. Smacking his head off of the floor. He held his head in his hands, groaning. “Ugggh...”

“Sorry! Sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry!” Twilight rushed to help him up, but he shooed her away. Clumsily, he got back to his feet, now sitting on the couch.

Who knew that you could get a hangover from wine? Drink responsibly, Kratos.

“What...” Kratos moved to sit up, his left hand moving to rest on his bald head. After looking around and remembering where he was, he looked back down at Twilight. “Were you looking at me sleep?”

“Like I haven’t been doing that in your dreams the last few days...” Twilight rolled her eyes. “You need to wake up. It’s morning, and there is much to do before we can get your new home.”

“Truly? Such as?” Kratos relaxed his eyes and stood up. The sooner he could give Twilight time to search for a spell, the better. And some real food. Spartans rarely ate fruits and vegetables. Already, he could tell his muscle mass had shrunken somewhat.

“As you recall, part of the deal was that you tried some anger reducing techniques. My research indicated that a good way to relieve rage was work.” Twilight found herself calming down, glad Kratos was at least trying to listen to her words.

“I’m not dating you.”

“That’s not work!”

“It should be...”

“Kratos!”

“What work could I possibly do? I refuse to work under Celestia’s pathetic guards.”

“My brother was a guard!” Twilight pouted, her cheeks puffing out a bit. Kratos wondered what was making Twilight so angry. She already knew his stance on the issue. “I was talking about a job in Ponyville. While we agreed to grant you a resident status and land to live in, you still need a form of income.”

“Then that is even more embarrassing.” He retorted, before remembering last night. Applejack, that worker mare. She told him to come around today for something.

“I got breakfast ready!” Spike called out from the kitchen. “Oh hey, Kratos is up. Hope you like haystacks.”

“I know not what those are. Tell me, am I free to find my own employment?” The Spartan asked. He looked away from the kitchen entrance and back down to Twilight.

“Really? You already thought that far ahead?” Twilight asked. “Where did you have in mind?”

“Some strange pony with a hat told me to come to her farm, if I can recall it correctly.”

“Applejack? Why would she ask for you?” Twilight questioned.

Kratos shrugged. “I doubt I can remember, but it was something important.”

The unicorn looked to the door. “Well maybe you can just... ask her...?”

“What?”

The front door opened, revealing a perky Applejack. “There y’are, Kratos. Ah was lookin’ all over for ‘ya. Now get up off’a your flank, ‘ya got some work ‘ta help me with.” The cowpony said, smiling. Kratos raised an eyebrow at his possible employer. If she was looking for him, why did she look so happy? Reminded him of a predator.

The Spartan sighed. “Well then, I’ll be going...” He said, before standing up and walking out of the door with Applejack. “So. This work,” Kratos started. “Will I be payed for it?” He asked.

Applejack looked to him. “Well, if’n ‘ya work hard enough, Ah can slip ‘ya ah few bits an’ such. Ya only took one apple from what Ah saw. A day’s work for just an apple is barely enough to pay me back.”

“No, I am actually looking for a source of income. You mean to tell me a single apple is equal to one days worth?!”

“Now ‘ya see, ‘ya can handle business...” Applejack smirked. “Now we haggle.”

“For pay?” Kratos begun to growl a bit. “So be it, farm mare. Do I get gold from the amount of work, or the same for a whole day?”

“Huh. ‘Yer actually civilized? You are jus’ confusing me...” Applejack confessed. “Thought ‘ya were just some barbarian.” Applejack chuckled, walking along the road with the Spartan. Ponies were giving them weird looks.

“I ran an army. They were paid. But some soldiers were paid by kills, and others like cooks for the day. To not know how to pay an army would be stupid,” Kratos explained. He wasn’t the God of War for nothing. Kratos turned to study the town as they walked, getting a better view now that the sun was out. Was this really how a land could look without war?

“Is that so?” AJ raised a brow, and Kratos nodded. “Well. Ah hope ‘yer up for some physical labor. ‘Ya look like ‘ya could be ah great help, with all of the muscle ‘yer packin’.” She chuckled.

The Ghost of Sparta merely raised a brow, saying, “It depends on what you mean by physical labor.”

“Buckin’ apple trees.” She replied.

“... What?” Kratos misheard her. “You fornicate with apple trees!? That’s disgusting!”

“Huh?! No! What in th’ name’a Celestia makes ‘ya think that!?” She exclaimed, slightly baffled. She stopped walking, lifting her head to frown at the ‘man’. Sweet Celestia! Was buck a word for rut to this human?

“Well, either I must have misheard you, or you said that you had sex with apple trees.” Kratos argued.

“We do not have sex with apple trees, for the love’a Celestia. We buck the apple trees,” AJ made a demonstration by bucking the air. “So that the apples can come down.”

“Wouldn’t that bruise them?” The Spartan asked.

“Please don’t talk like that around mah family...” The mare requested.

“What? The sex or the bruising?”

“What d’ya think? The sex, ‘ya rascal!”

“Shameful, how they flirt,” Time Turner said. He and Ditzy Doo were walking side by side when they heard the Spartan and the mare. A few other ponies started to look at the two.

“That’s flirting?” Ditzy asked. “They sound like an old married couple...”

“Maybe... maybe we should speak about this at the farm.” Kratos decided.

“Ya think?”

The God of War rolled his eyes, and they continued to walk to the farm.

• - - - Twenty Minutes of Walking Later...

“Now behave yerself, you understand me?” Applejack whispered to Kratos sternly.

“Yes, yes, I understand you...” The Spartan sighed in annoyance. Today was going to be a long day. “Show me to your plentiful orchard, so that I may get started with this... apple-bucking...” He requested.

AJ nodded, and walked into the beautiful orchard. Well, to Kratos, it was nothing more than boring, two-dimensional scenery, but still. The Spartan followed along.

“Alrigh’, here’s yer first test. Just ‘ta see if’n ‘ya can knock down ah few apples.” She smirked, tapping her hoof against a tree. “Ah want y’all ‘ta kick this here tree, and make some apples fall outta it.”

Kratos nodded. “Simple enough,” He then kicked the tree. Nothing happened, just a few leaves shook in place. He furrowed his brow.

“Just ah bit harder, there.”

So Kratos complied. Nothing happened yet again, save for the rattling of the branches.

“Harder.”

Whack. Nothing.

“Harder.”

Crack! Nothing again.

Kratos was starting to get a little bit agitated.

“C’mon there, Kratos. Ah know ‘ya can do better than that, ‘fer pony’s sake! Harder!”

His left eye twitched. “I’ll show you ‘harder’!” He replied angrily, smashing his foot into the tree.

Breaking it in goddamn half! The top of the tree, heavy with fruit, fell down. This in turn made the splintered part of the tree snap and cause even more splintering. Wood chips exploded from the impact, and the sound of the tree falling resembled more of a sickening thud than a tree being chopped down.

Clap... clap... clap... clap. That’s one way to do it, Kratos! Woo! Way to go, you blundering IDIOT!

Applejack just stared at him, absolutely dumbfounded by what just happened. Her face twisted into one of anger as Kratos walked over to another one. “Don’t you even think about--”

‘Twas too late. The tree was already in half, apples and branches and wood chips going everywhere.

“Ah oughta tan ‘yer darn hide! That was Zeus! The mightiest of the trees in the whole orchard! ‘Ya might as well’ve kicked him in the apples!” She rushed over to the fallen tree, inspecting the damage. “Zeus! Talk to me!”

Kratos shot Applejack a look, that could only say; ‘The hell are you talking about?!’.

“‘Yer gonna pay! Believe you me! Suck ‘ya dry! Ya hear me!? Ah’m gonna take all’a ‘yer bits!”

“Oh...” Kratos looked left and right, having misunderstood what suck meant. Ponies had a lot of definitions for one word, that much was for sure. And it was funny, considering he had no bits in the first place. “How am I supposed to pay you back, without having any money in the first place!?” Kratos demanded.

“Well Ah don’t know, git lost’r somethin’! Ah sure as hay can’t have ‘ya wreckin’ mah orchard like y’all jus’ did!” AJ yelled. “Zeus was our pride an’ joy! He was as old as Granny Smith!”

“So how then, shall I be expected to repay this? You are the one that told me harder!”

“AH DIDN’T MEAN THAT HARD!”

• - - - Meanwhile, at the farmhouse...

“Oh mah gosh! Bic Mac, ya hear that? Applejack’s in heat!” Granny Smith said.

“Eeyup.”

“About time Ah get great grandkids!”

• - - - Dear Christ, back to the story.

“If'n Ah didn’t wanna break mah hooves against 'yer thick skull, Ah’d buck 'ya 'inna next week!”

Kratos couldn’t help but laugh, his arms crossed. He hadn’t laughed in a long, long while. It was strange.

“What’s so darn funny!!?” AJ demanded.

“I can’t take you seriously with that damned hat on!” Kratos smacked his knee, bending over as his laughs died down to a chuckle.

A crimson blush shot across Applejack’s face, and she looked away from him. Taking her hat off, she said, “Alright! Can ‘ya take me seriously now!?” She asked, looking back to him.

The Ghost of Sparta stared her dead in the eyes. Applejack stared up at him, refusing to back down. The frown and anger in her face was apparent.

“Kratos!”

“Twilight?” Applejack asked. Both turned to look at the purple unicorn as she called out his name. “Why brings ‘ya by sugarcube?”

“Kratos left without eating, so I brought some lunch! I know it’s early, but I figured better deliver it at least so I can study later,” Twilight trotted up to them with a smile. ‘And to keep Kratos from destroying everypony.’ She thought to herself. “What happened to the tree?”

“Kratos happened to the tree.” Applejack rolled her eyes.

“Applejack, what did you do?” Twilight narrowed her eyes a bit.

“What?! Why is this mah fault?”

“Kratos doesn’t just break stuff without a reason...” Twilight frowned. She knew that much at least.

“Why are ‘ya takin’ his side!?”

“I’m not taking sides! I’m just getting your story side first. You must have done something to egg him on, or else he wouldn’t have... did he really just do that with a buck?”

Kratos sighed. “It was my fault for striking the trees that hard.” He admitted.

Applejack smiled, though she was still upset. “‘Ya see? Ah told ‘ya so.”

“AJ, nopony likes an ‘I told you so’, but I see... I think I have a solution.”

“Truly?”

Twilight nodded. “Kratos can compensate for the damage by taking your shift. Does that not seem fair?”

Applejack grew a devilish smirk on her face. “That seems more than jus’ fair, sugarcube.” She chuckled. “He’ll take my shift for washin’ Granny Smith!”

“Gross...”

“She has hot flashes, Ah should warn ‘ya!” AJ chuckled.

“Fine. I shall do this,” Kratos walked off, not caring it seems. Though they didn’t know, Kratos had taken care of animals before. Many times in fact, in war he had ridden horses.

“That Kratos sure has ah long way to go, sugarcube...”

“At least he’s trying, AJ. So, what do you think?”

“Ah'd let him work here more if he could get some darn anger management.”

“Why?”

“Are ‘ya kidding me? He can kick that hard when he’s sick?"

"How'd you know that he was sick?" Twilight asked.

"Jus' look at 'im." Applejack gestured to the man who was walking away, eyeing him up and down.

"Applejack, he damaged your--"

"Imagine him when he’s healthy!”

“... I can see that...” But Twilight really didn't want to.

“Jus' imagine all'a that muscle an' energy directed at buckin' an apple tree. Ah bet he'd clear the whole dang orchard in ah week!” Both mares shared a laugh. "He'd make ah good farmhand, but until he learns not 'ta... destroy property, Ah'd recommend keepin' him away." Applejack recommended.

"Good idea... I am keeping an eye on him, after all. Fluttershy was a bit too... terrified when I asked her if she'd watch over Kratos, unfortunately." Twilight sighed.

To say Kratos was fine would be a lie. Now, he may have looked as though he was absolutely fine, but think about it. He slept for almost a year without moving- this caused muscle reduction. Stacked up with the lack of protein, he was sick. The lack of exercise, everything.

He walked along the dirt road back to Ponyville. Maybe he should try to get a job away from the crazy mares. This ‘Fluttershy’ sounded like she could be a good fuck.

Kratos had been wondering about things on his walk. How long it would take before he could return to Olympus was one thought. And another was, did he really want to go? Of course he did. He wanted nothing more than to drive his blades through Zeus’s heart. But he wasn’t thinking that at the time. What if it took Twilight a few years to develop the spell? What if he went, and ended up dying? What if he never went back?

Would the relationships he could have built up in Equestria be for naught? Would denying said relations be worth it? If that was so, he would have to guarantee someone - or somepony - that he’d come back alive. And he couldn’t make a promise. He couldn’t.

He let out a sigh. He was thinking about it too much. Kratos would just have to trust Twilight with this. In the meantime, maybe Twilight was right- maybe he should find a way to get rid of his anger.

Once he reached Ponyville, he was followed by this white-coated mare, with a frou-frou mane and tail which were purple in coloration. Kratos looked to the mare. “Is there something bothering you?” He asked in annoyance.

“Oh my, no no no, darling. It’s merely that... piece of dingy cloth you’re wearing.” She seemed to pay more attention to his skirt than the man himself.

“Why not hire an artist to paint you a portrait? It shall last longer, wench.” Kratos spat.

The mare gasped. “How dare you! I was merely going to offer my assistance in refurbishing that dreadful excuse for a piece of clothing, but since you are so rude, you are undeserving of my time!” She walked ahead of him with a humph.

Kratos ignored this, and continued on with his day. What was he doing anyway? What was he going to do? That much, he did not know. With a sigh, he sat down on a chair, which was in front of a small table. Both belonged to a cafe, but Kratos merely wanted to relax.

A stallion with a moustache, a slicked-back mane and a tuxedo walked up to him. “What is your order, sir?” He asked.

“Hmm?” The demigod looked to him. “If the water is free, I will take a glass of it.” He replied.

“Of course sir.” This stallion wasn’t like the other ponies- he was mature, obviously professional. In the sense that he could get over the fact that you were an entirely different race, yet still treat you as a customer. He walked away, and soon came back with Kratos’s requested glass of water. He levitated it onto the table. “There you are.” He said, before walking off.

The Spartan idly sipped from the glass, thinking over what he should do today. Least he could get drunk tonight. This ‘work’ Applejack did not suit him at all. If he did stay, what would be his place in this realm? He briefly considered multiple things, but none really suited him. There were no wars going on, no true outlet for his bloodlust, which he knew would return eventually. All of this thinking was really working him up. He never had to think over and over and over like this.

Well, he could masturbate to relieve some of the stress. Like it’d do much.

That would be like shaving a cube of ice off of the iceberg that sunk the Titanic.

“What if... just maybe.” He mumbled something to himself. What if they turned him into a pony? Or one of their women changed into a human? One trained in oral pleasure?

He didn’t know. The idle thought that it would be interesting dwindled in his head, but he quickly dismissed it as a temporary fit of insanity. Continuing on with drinking his water, he found himself continuing to think. He gripped the glass, harder and harder, until finally, it cracked.

Water spilled all over his skirt and chest, glass shards hitting but not damaging his rough skin. Snapping out of it from the noise, Kratos realized what he had done. He just sighed. What else could go wrong today? What in the name of Tartarus else could go wrong?!

He didn’t know. Oh, he just didn’t know.

• - - - Meanwhile, at ze Castle...

Princess Celestia chuckled a bit, lifting her head up from the crystal ball she used to inspect Kratos’s progress. She had been nervous, this could honestly be called Kratos’s first real day in Equestria as a citizen, and he had yet so much to learn-

“Who’s there?” She called out, looking left and right quickly. She felt as though somepony was watching her. “Hello?” Soon, peace returned. The Princess didn’t need to worry.

For now, at least.

A smile cracked across her face as she returned to her work; writing a letter to Mayor Mare.

‘I hope Kratos likes this gift...’

Author's Note

"All of my stories run on my theories, and my ideas. If you have a problem with them, move on, and have a good day. If you don't like it, don't read it. It's as simple as that.

"If you spot any grammatical problems, tell me. If you spot any punctuation problems, tell me. If you have a problem with the plot, I'll give you this and this only: It's my story. Not yours. If you want to happen, write it yourself, or stop bugging authors to make a story that they enjoy writing, into something that you would enjoy. In other words, your ideas are your ideas, and my ideas are my ideas. Don't try to force anything down my throat, or another's. Write it yourself, or it isn't going to happen."

• ZTB