The Republican Bureau

The Oval Office

America, Equestria(Soon to be America), Pony Earth(Soon to be America)

10:45 AM Communist Time(Soon to be American Standard Time)

"Wow, you like, live here?" wondered Celestia, who'd never seen a house as big and white as this except the palace that she lives in, of course. Her eyes were rolling so fast she was able to see every detail of the room at the speed of light.

"Yeah," Donald said, like it was no big deal, "it's, like, no bid deal," he said like it wasn't a big deal. "This room is called the Oval Office, but, to tell you the truth, I'd much prefer to get into your ova(ry)l office, if you catch my driftwood," he said with a wink.

Celestia's cheeks turned so hot, the walls and furniture began melting, and she averted her gaze. She couldn't lie, this Donald Trump fellow was pretty attractive, and she was hankerin' for a spankerin' if you catch my driftwood. "Well, I guess I wouldn't be completely against that. N-not that I'm desperate or anything, b-baka!" she finished, whipping her twin horse tails around in embarrassment.

But before they could get to that spankerin', Celestia suddenly felt very woozy, and she dizzily stumbled over to a chair. Donald's bird lips twisted into a smile as he knew precisely what was happening. The republinol was finally taking effect. There was a great big flash, everything just changed, her molecules got all rearranged. When she first woke up she realized she had wrinkly white skin, and a republican mind. Within moments, her organs and bones had rearranged themselves into a superior, human arrangement, and the chemicals in her brain rearranged themselves into a superior, republican arrangement. Though, she ended up more as a wrinkly mass than a normal human. She was like two-thousand years-old after all.

"Wow, would you look at that. You turned into a republican," Trump said nonchalantly as he took off his pants. Thankfully, he had a granny fetish, so he really had no problem with this. Of course Celestia didn't hear a word he said as she wasn't wearing her hearing aid today.

Without wasting any more time, Trump moved in and grabbed her arm, lifting it up to expose the even-more-wrinkled flesh of her armpit. Trump absolutely loved armpits. In his personal opinion, they were the most sexy part of a woman's body. He leaned in and sniffed it, savoring the sweet, slightly fowl(it's ironic because he's a bird), smell of sweat that was wafting from her underarm. Poking his tongue out between his teeth, he prodded her bare skin with his meat member.

His eyes widened, and he began salivating, his tongue twisting and expunging all of its saliva at once as it instead absorbed the salty liquid from her armpit. In a moment, he'd sucked the pit dry, and he pulled back, his eyes closing as he savored it like a fine wine. "Daijobu," Trump remarked, feeling his heart going 'doki doki' in his chest.

Wasting no more time, Trump turned around and bent over, exposing his genitals. Most birds don't actually have external genitals, and the same was true for him. His 'penis' was simply a hole just below his anus, and while it may have seemed strange, it was actually an impressive size when compared to that of other birds. Donald's face turned red as he squeezed, almost instantly expelling a thick glob of cum from the hole and onto Celestia's still-exposed armpit.

Of course, by this point, Celestia had already been dead for over a minute, being far older than any human could ever manage, and the force of Trump's big, American cummies caused her withered, decrepit husk of a corpse to practically disintegrate into a fine powdery dust, filling the air and covering all the furniture. Trump coughed a bit as he accidentally breathed some Celestia in, and he ordered a few maids(that weren't Mexican) to come in and clean up the mess.

Donald Trump pressed a button on his desk, which sent out Republican Frequency Waves, summoning his entire  Republican cabinet, save for the Mr.Vice President who probably had a prior engagement, not that Vice Presidents matter anyway.

In a flash, lasting fifteen minutes, mostly containing, wheezing and complaining about a lack of chairs, the Republicans made their way to the Oval Office.

"Gentlemen, I have some stupacular news to share with you vile ingrates," said Bald-Donald Eagle-Trump as he walked behind his desk with his hands folded behind his back just like the presidents in the movies do,"republinol was a rousing success, it turned one of the natives in to a full-grown, living, breathing Republican woman."

Once again the Republicans "ooohed" like a group of impressed Japanese business men.

"So where is this living, breathing Republican woman?" Inquired the lowliest of the Republican cabinet.

"Could somebody more important please ask me that same question? I don't feel comfortable answering such a lowly, sad little man." Requested Trump.

"So where is this living, breathing Republican woman?" Inquired the second least lowly member of the Republican cabinet.

"A fair question, and I shall answer honestly, as all politicians do," said Trump dramatically, "she crumbled into dust shortly after I came on her armpit."

"That's really fucking disgusting." Stated the third least lowly Republican.

"You're missing the point, our plan will work," said Trump as he sat down at his desk with a smirk on his face," we just have to get republinol into the native's food supply. Then we will have our army of right-wing voters all sucking at my generous teats, securing my victory in the next election."

"With so many republicans on our side, we'll finally be able to get rid of those pesky Mexicans once and for all," another republican exclaimed, getting shouts of agreement from the rest of them.

At the mere mention of that inferior race, Trump's brow furrowed, and he began to speak once again. "Yes, those Mexicans can't be trusted. What can you expect from filthy little heathens? Their whole disgusting race is like a curse. Their skins a shittish brown. They must be taken down. They're vermin as I said, and worse. They're Mexicans! Mexicans! Barely even human. Mexicans! Mexicans! Drive them from our country! They're not like you and me, which means they must be evil. Now we build a wall for sure!"

The Republicans juked and jived like a bunch of rattlesnakes in a dutch oven, and they sang all the way to the air-force base, where the AN-225 was waiting, ready to go. There, Mr. Vice President was waiting, seemingly not having gotten the memo about the meeting, and him and Trump got in the plane.

"So, what's the 4-1-1?" Wondered Mr. Vice President, sure to use all the hip-hoppinist lingo so he can stay cool with the youngins like Anakin Skywalker.

"You'd have known that if you came to the meeting," Trump sulked, annoyed that his very own 2nd in command had blown him off.

"Oh come on, don't be like that," Mr. Vice President tried to console, patting the president on the back.

"It sets a bad example for all the underlings if not everyone shows up," he said, refusing to make eye contact with his Vice.

"I know what will cheer you up," Donald immediately turned, eyes wide and excited as Mr. Vice President pulled out a red, white, and blue bomb pop.

"Wowzer mister, is that for me?!" Trump gushed, barely able to contain his excitement and immediately forgetting why he was even upset in the first place.

"You know Donald," started Mr. Vice President as he handed the president his treat, while also handing him some important advice, "you can build walls around people all you want, but never build a wall around your heart. If you ever have anything on your mind, you can always count on me."

"Thanks Turbo man, I mean Mr. Vice President," Trump exclaimed between licks. He was so glad he could at least always count on his vice president to be there for him. He was such a swell guy, and definitely the most loyal person in the entire republican cabinet. "How long until we get to that dumb horse country?"

"We've already been there for like 10 minutes," explained Mr. Vice President, "our glorious American airplane is able to fly at the speed of free."

Sure enough, they had already landed in the middle of one of the pony's towns, and the crew had already begun unloading the cargo. "Alright then, time to go make some republicans."