Twilight Plays Card Games Not On Motorcycles

by DarkAura

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Twilight Sparkle, Random
Length: 2992

Twilight's here to kick some flank and play card games, and she's all out of flank.

Twilight, simply put, loves Duel Monsters. Just the strategy of it that actually makes her think is what kindled her enjoyment for it. Watch Twilight play a children's card game against a "holographic" (holographic meaning it can touch cards, plays cards, etc. for the entire duration of the duel, then it disappears) AI she successfully made appear using magic.

Just a simple card game, is what it is.

Also: If anyone can find a good cover picture of Twilight playing Duel Monsters, it'd be greatly appreciated. Seriously, Google Images is no help right now.

Published 2013-05-18 07:00:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-05-18 23:43:00 UTC

It's Time to Duel

An impatient hoof tapped the ground repeatedly, which was connected to an impatient pony, awaiting for her friend to be done already. This pony was Twilight Sparkle.

Growing antsier and antsier by the minute, she threw her head up and moaned for a good three seconds. Can't she go any faster? Twilight thought. I actually have somewhere to be. The truth was, it wasn't anything important Twilight might've been late for. In fact, it was just a simple game. A filly's card game, to be precise. But this game was a game she felt slightly embarrassed to tell her friends about, not because of its reputation to have a directed demograph of fillies when in reality many grown mares and stallions are ever so obsessed with it. No, it was because she felt she didn't know enough about Duel Monsters yet. She only started playing a week ago, and she preferred to wait until she had enough expertise so she'd be able to explain the concept to her friends, to make them understand it better.

She shook her head. Now was not the time to be thinking about the game until she actually got back to the library. A glance at the clock on one of the walls told her it had been fifteen minutes since Pinkie started up on the batch. Too long for a pony like Pinkie, she decided, so she finally yelled out. "Pinkie, come on already!"

"Coming~" Just like that, Pinkie came through the door and threw the cupcakes in the air. Before Twilight could scream out, the cupcakes landed ever so neatly on the counter in front of her, and Pinkie rang the bell. "Whoo! A baker's dozen cupcakes made in record time! That's how Sugarcube Corner represents!"

Twilight quickly surveyed the cupcakes. "Pinkie, there's only eleven. A baker's dozen has thirteen."

"I know!" Pinkie licked her lips. "So Twilight, what do you need these cupcakes for anyway?" With a gasp, she said, "Oh! Don't tell me you made me make them so you could share them with us! Oh Twilight, you shouldn't have!" She reached for a(nother) cupcake, but Twilight immediately shot a small magic zap at her, making Pinkie reel her hoof back.

"No Pinkie," she said with a sigh. "These aren't for you." She levitated the cupcakes into a box and sealed it.

"Then why'd you make me make them?"

Twilight was taken aback by the question. It would seem peculiar to everyone that she had Pinkie bake thirteen cupcakes if Twilight was the only one who was actually there to be able to eat food. Then again, it seemed weird to her too. She became lost in thought at the concept of her getting food for the sake of keeping up a little facade about doing something other than playing a filly's card game. Pinkie waved a hoof in her face.

"Hello!" said Pinkie, her hooves still waving long after Twilight had snapped out of her thoughts. "Didn't you hear me? What's the super duper biggy wiggy occasion for cupcakes? A wedding? A birthday? A divorce- oh, wait, that's not something to make cupcakes about. Maybe more like brownies!"

Fortunately, Twilight had a lie all planned out. Unfortunately, she was a horrible liar, not to mention how she wasn't actually used to lying to her friends, nor did she like doing so. "It's because... um..." Her mind went blank. She had completely forgotten her lie. Her eyes surveyed the area, trying to find something to make a different excuse out of. "Uh..." Her eyes landed on a flower pot. "Flooower... Jones, yeah, Flower Jones from my, uh, book club is coming, and I need the cupcakes for a snack of sorts! Yeah, that's it!"

Pinkie gave a long gasp as she jumped in the air. "Ooh, a book club? Can I join? CanICanICanI?!"

"Nope, no, sorry, can't!" Twilight said frantically. "We have too many members already." She turned her horn to the box of cupcakes, levitating it up in the air. "I'll see you tomorrow Pinkie. And thanks for the cookies!"

"Cupcakes."

"Yeah, that," she said, walking out of Sugarcube Corner and heading to the library, her pace quickening as she got closer.

"Spi-ike!" Twilight yelled upon entering the library.

"Yeah Twilight?" Spike said as he entered from the upstairs, stretching his arms. It was obvious he had just awoken from a nap, or was about to fall asleep. With a yawn, he said, "What'dya need?"

"I need you to go to Canterlot and retrieve a scroll for me," she said as she set the box of cupcakes down on a table.

Spike was about to protest asking why she couldn't do it, but he thought better of himself. After all, he was Twilight's faithful assistant, and it wouldn't be very faithful to decline a simple request like that, now would it. He saluted and said, "Roger! But uh... What does the scroll look like?"

"Oh believe me," she chuckled, "You'll know when you see it."

With a nod, Spike left the library. Twilight stood there for a full minute, just to make sure he was gone. When she was absolutely sure that he had left, she closed the door and locked it, sighing afterwards. She didn't like lying to her number one assistant, but she was absolutely sure Spike just wouldn't understand how Twilight could love playing a card game, despite there being situations where, time and time again, Spike would always be by her side. Spike was never a dragon to belittled anypony, but Twilight's paranoia got the best of her.

She pushed those thoughts to the back of her head. Using her magic on the box of cupcakes yet again, she walked with it to the basement, where she set the box down briefly and shot a fleck of magic at a seemingly random spot in the dark room.

Instantly, the room burst with light and a door appeared. Through the door, there was a large room, littered with boxes. What those boxes contained, only Twilight knew. She approached the middle of the room, where a mat was placed, one side being red, the other blue. Little rectangular markings were on each side, as if it was a mini playing field.

Twilight stomped her hooves twice on the ground, which turned on the lights. The mat was indeed a playing field. She set the cupcakes down as she sat down on the blue side. Using more of her magic, she levitated one of the boxes to her. Opening the box revealed a deck of brown cards. She levitated those up and separated them in half. She set the two halves on each side of the playing field.

Twilight took a deep breath. "Alright... If I recall this spell correctly, this should work." She pointed her horn at the empty player spot on the other side of the mat and concentrated. For weeks, she had been trying to perfect a spell that would allow intellectual artificial intelligence to be her opponent. The AI would've been able to make strategic moves that'd give Twilight a challenge. Oh, how she loved a good challenge.

More concentration. Her face twisted with the strain as sweat started to appear from her forehead. Suddenly, an icy feeling appeared on her tail, gradually travelling up her body. This was to be expected, and she most certainly couldn't stop now. She withstood the freezing cold that her body was experiencing and continued concentrating on the empty spot.

Then, as fast as it came, the icy feeling shattered, leaving Twilight feeling warm and fuzzy. She knew she had done it, and then relaxed. Her fuzzy feeling turned into giddy excitement when she saw the holographic image form of a translucent pony with no mane nor tail. The hologram then seemed to have shatter, but what was left was the same translucent pony. Except it wasn't a hologram any more. For the duration of the duel, it would be able to play real cards and have real intelligence. The AI turned to the worn out mare and asked her, in a monotonous and somewhat computerized tone, "Shall we begin?"

She nodded and drew five cards, just as her opponent did. She turned to the AI, fire fueling her determination. Drawing much confidence, she said, "It's time to duel."

Author's Note

If you've noticed at the beginning, Twilight wondered how weird it was for her to get a full box of cupcakes when she was the only one eating. For anyone even slightly familiar with Duel Monsters, they'd know that to play a game of it requires to people. But at the end, there's an AI, so yes, Twilight's the only one eating. Ha, I know my continuity errors, don't I?

Next chapter should start the duel, provided I can actually write it. I'll try my best to not let this die like the others!

A Rocky Start

Both duelists started with 4000 life points. Each of them studied their "hand" thoroughly, though Twilight's opponent more so. The AI gazed at its cards with much intent, its expression neutral. I'm up against a duelist with an amazing poker face. Should bring a much more interesting duel, Twilight noted.

Twilight took a look at her own cards. Tribe-Infecting Virus, 7 Colored Fish, Trap Hole, Mystic Box, and Jar of Greed... Not bad, though it'd be more useful to get more than one monster card on the first draw. In Duel Monsters, a duelist could never attack on the first turn, which is why going second was more preferable. Still, Twilight needed a shield to protect herself from her opponent's when/if it attacked. She set down the 7 Colored Fish card on her mat. "I play 7 Colored Fish in defense mode!"

Using her magic, she created a small holographic image of the 7 Colored Fish on top of the card. The hologram of the fish snarled, its beady eyes sending death threats all around. It used its tail to signify that it was in defense mode. A sign appeared next to the fish, with the numbers 1800 and 800 on top and on bottom respectively. These numbers told both duelists what the attack and defense points were of that monster.

"I end my..." Twilight faltered. She looked at the four other cards she was levitating and started to debate whether to put Trap Hole on the field face down or not, and to decide whether she should use Jar of Greed to get a potential monster card. In the end, she decided it wasn't worth it. "I end my turn."

The opponent drew a card and took a good long look at it. It put the card on the field where the trap and spell cards are played. "I play one card face down, and I end my turn."

Strange, thought Twilight. 7 Colored Fish has only 800 measly defense points. Most monsters could defeat that, and that left Twilight wondering why the opponent didn't send out a monster. Because it doesn't have one, she deduced, and that brought forth a smirk on her face. Super intelligent AI or not, no pony could attack when they had nothing to attack with.

Twilight drew a card from her deck. It was a card called Yami, with a picture of what seemed to be a black hole accompanying it. Not useful for now, she thought. Yami's effect was to boost the attack and defense of Fiend- and Spellcaster- type monsters by 200, while it would decrease that same amount with Fairy type monsters. 7 Colored Fish's type was Fish, obviously different that the types mentioned in the Yami card.

She took a look at the playing field, specifically her opponent's face down card. Was it a trap or a spell? It had to have been a trap, otherwise her opponent would've left itself wide open to an attack should Twilight choose to switch 7 Colored Fish to attack mode. But this was an AI with the IQ of a super computer, so maybe it knew Twilight would avoid attacking thinking it was a trap card and actually played a spell card instead. But if Twilight could figure that out, who's to say it wasn't really a trap card?

The confused mare shook her head. She really had no definite way of deciding what the face down card was. She returned her focus to her cards. Maybe she could use her Jar of Greed? She'd hate to end her turn doing nothing. "I play Jar of Greed! With it, I can draw another card from my deck!"

She set the Jar of Greed in her graveyard and drew a card from her deck. Please let it be good, please let it be good...! The card was... Pot of Greed. Twilight nearly moaned, but didn't, as she didn't want her opponent to know she drew a bad card. Well, not exactly bad, per se, but that was exactly like Jar of Greed except that it let her draw two cards instead of one.

"I end my turn," she said simply.

The AI drew a card from its deck, its expression still of that of an amazing poker face. "I place one card face down and end my turn," it send, putting the card it just drew face down next to the other card.

Great. Now I've got two potential trap cards to worry about, thought Twilight as she drew a card. Trap Master! Alright!

"Say your prayers, because I'm playing Trap Master in attack mode!" Twilight yelled as she set the card down next to her 7 Colored Fish. The holographic image of a clown-like creature appeared, its lower half of its body, being mechanical, whirred and buzzed in anticipation. The marker that tells its attack and defense points appeared, with 500 on top and 1100 on bottom.

"With this card, I can destroy a trap card of yours! And I pick that one!" She pointed her hoof to the first face down card her opponent played. "Of course, I don't know if that's a trap or not. But Trap Master can flip up the card, and if it's a trap, I can destroy it. If it's just a spell card, well, it'll go back to being face down, but I'd still know what the card is! Go, Trap Master!"

The clown downright flew to the card, readying its chainsaw lower half. The opponent's card went face up, revealing the trap card Robbin' Goblin. A malicious grin grew on the clown as it brought down its chainsaw.

"I activate Fake Trap!" The AI yelled. A little hobbit that looked as if it was burned popped up in front of the Robbin' Goblin. It held up a scroll with the single word 'False'. The poor thing took the full brunt of the attack and shattered.

The AI put the Fake Trap trap card in its graveyard as Twilight studied it. When it activated Fake Trap, it seemed to have had... determination in its voice. But that was absurd. It was just an AI; it had no feelings or aspirations of the duel. Or... did it? And what was with that Robbin' Goblin card? She wasn't far enough in her knowledge of the game to know the effects of all the cards; Just that she knew the iconic cards by heart. If she wasn't careful, the card could spell death for her and her cards.

Lost in thought again, Twilight got back to reality when her opponent piped up. "Well?" it asked, a hint of irritation in its voice.

I'll need to keep an even closer eye on it. Then again, an opponent with a full resolve of winning would be much more fun! she thought. "I end my turn."

The AI drew a card, studied it for a moment, then put it in its hand. It placed a card (One that was in its hand to begin with, Twilight noted) next to the Robbin' Goblin card. "I play Change of Heart."

The image of an angel with a heart in its hands appeared on top of the card, half of it being dark with bat wings while the other half was light with angel wings. Twilight decided that it was used to signify two opponents of a duel, how both would usually have different ideals than the other.

"With it, I can take control of a monster from your field for one turn, and I choose 7 Colored Fish."

The angel, quick as light, glided towards the fish. Once it made contact, it simply... disappeared. Or so it would seem. In reality, it had taken control of the monster, and it brought it to the AI's side.

"Seeing as how Change of Heart doesn't say anything about changing positions or anything of the sort, I switch 7 Colored Fish to attack mode!" The fish brought its tail back and bared its tusks. Its razor sharp tusks. Tusks that could probably fatally wound a pony. Thankfully it wasn't real. "7 Colored Fish, attack that Trap Master!"

The fish dived towards the clown and sunk its fangs in it. The clown opened its mouth as to scream, but nothing came out, and the clown promptly shattered. Twilight reluctantly put its card in the Graveyard.

"I end my turn," it said, and the 7 Colored Fish returned to Twilight's side of the field. The AI put the Change of Heart card in the Graveyard.

This isn't good, though Twilight. I'm only at the beginning of the game, and I'm already down to 2700 Life Points! I need a miracle soon, or I might not make it through...!

Author's Note

Every time 'hand' is said, it means the cards that they're levitating in front of them. Just didn't want you guys getting confused, since ponies don't have hands and all.