Maid Just for the Readers Two: Royal Treatment

(Note: Sorry if there are any noticeable grammar or spelling mistakes in this chapter. I wrote most of it at six in the morning.)

Three hours have passed since your second group of unwelcome guests' arrival. In the time between their sudden appearance, and the current moment, a train of events that is certainly worth discussing has transpired. For one, you had spent about an hour and a half introducing Celestia and Luna to several pieces of conventional human technology. Computers, televisions, telephones, video games, et cetera. You had initially hoped that you could have excluded Luna from the introduction to the latter piece of tech. However, it turns out that she isn't a gamer. She doesn't even know what a video game is. The "Gamer Luna" section of the Brony fandom kind of fed you a spoon full of bullshit on that stand point.

Another task that you found yourself obligated to carry out was to introduce the two to human cuisine. In simple terms, Celestia was less than pleased to find out that hacked-up animals are a regular human dietary piece. However, her hostility seemed to fade upon you informing her that humans are omnivores. She thanked you for elaborating. You then asked the two of them in either of them were hungry, to which you received a unanimous "yes". You whipped up a quick meal of three small salads, and set them at opposing ends of your kitchen table. One salad on one side, and two on another. You, then, seated yourself for a late-night meal. A late-night meal with two anthropomorphic horses. Indubitably, yes.

(I'd like to note that, for this section, the story will persist in past-tense. It will shift back to present-tense after this momentary recap of events is over)

You, Luna, and Celestia spent slightly over 30 minutes enjoying the salads that you had put together (Which were, in truth, nothing more than cherry tomatoes, shredded cheese, and lettuce mixed together.). After being asked if you had any drinks available, you presented the two of them with carbonated soda. Celestia seemed to take a swift liking to it, where as Luna did not seem to particularly enjoy it's mouth-burning levels of carbonation. Because of this, you simply gave her a glass of refrigerated orange juice.

The meal carried out pleasantly, with you being able to get passed who it was that you were eating with. The three of you conversed about several different subjects. Mainly human culture, Equestrian culture, and the situation at hand. The latter conversation subject led in to one of the notable points of the meal. You had (jokingly) questioned Celestia on whether or not she would follow through on her threats of persistent seduction attempts.

"Oh, I will, human." She said. "However, it's a bit too late, right now. Apparently, human and Equestrian time zones are different. It was only two in the afternoon when me and Luna had teleported here, and it's passed six AM, right now."

You gave a chuckle at the almost reassuring nature of her comment, and turned to Luna. You proceeded to ask her just what she thought of the human world, at the time.

"It certainly isn't as I had anticipated." She answered. "Mainly your species' usage of animals, as well as your baffling levels of technology. At least, baffling in comparison to my own world's technology."

You give an interested nod in response.

"Human..." Celestia said, lifting her can of soda away from her muzzle. "May I ask you an honest question?"

You gave her an okay.

"Would you..." She hesitated. "Have any interest in... Keeping on touch... after this ordeal is over?"

Puzzled by this inquiry, you asked her what it is that she meant.

"Well... I'm sure that the entirety of this situation has harbored many changes in the lives of every party involved... And it would be terrible to see it just... Finish."

You gave a sarcastic chuckle, assuring yourself that her statement was not said in a serious way. She replied to this by flashing you a broad look of disapproval. A kind of "What the fuck are you laughing at?" look. By this, you were able to gather that she was, in fact, not joking. You wiped your face clean of any sort of whimsey. You then tried your damnedest to formulate a quick, reasonable response. The best response that you could come up with was that "you'd think about it".

"Yeah... Okay..." Celestia replied, her face carrying a false smile.

The three of you then proceeded to carry out your meal. The remainder of the meal session went without conversation and socializing. The three of you simply carried out an uncomfortable, silent meal.

"H-Human?" Luna eventually came to say. "If it's not too much trouble, could I please take a brief shower in your bathroom?"

You gave a puzzled okay, before asking for clarification on why she needed a shower.

"Oh, it is quite simple." She replied. "Despite our absence from Equestria, I would still wish to keep up on at least a shred of my royal schedule. A nightly bathing, usually occurring at a much earlier hour than this, is a vital part of that schedule."

Not feeling any more need to question her, you gave her the okay. She thanked you, and took her leave. This is where you are, now. This story is back in present tense. Deal with it. Luna's absence seems to set off a light bulb in Celestia's head, as she cracks a sinister grin upon Luna's exit.

"Human, could you please... Take a brief exit from the kitchen?"

This question obviously spurs your suspicion. Without exiting eye-contact with her, you question Celestia on her motives.

"Oh well, I was just hoping that I would be able to make an attempt at preparing you a meal. A bit of a 'thank you' for your hospitality."

Not wanting to lower your guard, you ask her exactly what it is that she intends to "cook".

"I was planning on baking a cake. You do have the necessary ingredients, right?"

You inform her that a lack of cake ingredients is not the reasoning for you being hesitant to leave her alone in your kitchen. It's a combination of two aspects. One is that she'll most likely use this as an opportunity to attempt something vulgar, and the other is that she'll probably get herself killed in your kitchen.

"Human, how far back do you think Equestrians are? We know what ovens and refrigerators are! Plus, I've lived through countless wars in Equestria! I'm fairly certain that I can handle using a butter knife and an egg beater. You have to remember that I am immortal."

You have to give her that one. You decide to give her the benefit of the doubt. You give her the okay to use your utensils. You show her the appropriate drawers and cupboards to find whatever it is that she will need in, and you tell her to stay away from the microwave.

"Understood. Now, please, exit."

With this, you nod your head, and reluctantly exit the kitchen. Both Celestia and Luna are off partaking in their own activities, so you have a bit of time to do practically anything that you could usually do. You could watch television, or play a video game. You would go out and do something productive, but there are two anthropomorphic horses in your house. You're not going to leave them alone. You decide that the best thing to do is to get a bit more sleep. That way, if one of them does end up doing something cataclysmic, at least you'll be woken up by it. You lay yourself down on your living room sofa, and allow yourself to drift into sleep... Again.

"Human! Can you come to the kitchen for a second? I finished your cake!"

You are shocked into consciousness by this shout. You nearly roll off of your couch upon waking up, but you manage to catch yourself before you roll too far. You grumble under your breath. Why would Celestia need to wake you up to tell you that she finished your cake? Why couldn't she just put it on the counter until you wake up. You look at your cable box's built-in clock. It indicates that the time is only about 40 minutes after you had initially fallen asleep. How would she have been able to bake a cake in that time? You manage to dismiss this thought upon realizing that she holds the power of 1,000 suns in an appendage that protrudes from her forehead. You set out for the kitchen.

As you walk to the kitchen, you find yourself wondering what kind of cake Celestia has prepared for you. It's most likely just a white cake with vanilla frosting, as that is the only type of cake that your on-hand ingredients would allow to be baked. As you near your kitchen, you find your stomach grumbling. Maybe a bit of unhealthy chocolate is just what you needed after ingesting a plate of lettuce, cherry tomatoes, and shredded cheese. However, after you turn the corner to the kitchen, you find yourself being faced with something far from your initial expectations.

Celestia sits on one of your kitchen counters, her legs hanging lazily over the side. What is most surprising about this situation is, couldn't you guess? She is completely stripped naked. This must have been what she was talking talking about when had informed you that her attempts at seduction would be more vulgar that Twilight and Rarity's. Upon closer inspection, you're able to piece together that she has vanilla cake frosting covering her breasts' areolae, as well as her "sensitive spot." Before you can react to this horrifying scene, she speaks up.

"...But I've made a bit of a mess." She says, in continuation of the statement that had awoken you. Her tone of voice is extremely sultry. "If only someone could... Lick me clean."

You press your hand to your face, before swiftly pulling it away. You give a loud groan of frustration. You tell her to get off of your counter, to put her dress back on, and to get out of your kitchen.

"Human, I don't see why you're so annoyed. I warned you of my goals, as well as the measures that I was willing to go to to accomplish them." She says, her voice returning to it's normal tone.

You shout that what she is doing is not what you had imagined. What she is doing breaks all rules that could be broken. Your frustration with the situation overcoming you, you flash her the middle finger, and walk away.

"H-Human! Wait!" She shouts.

You ignore her, continuing to walk forward. As you walk passed your downstairs bathroom, you can hear what vaguely sounds like running water inside. By this, you're able to piece together that Luna is still inside. You wonder how she could possibly take a 45 minute long shower. You give a brief glace to the doorknob. Before you can look away, or continue walking, you're given an unpleasant surprise. The doorknob begins glowing a noticeably bright shade of yellow. By this, you are able to piece together that Celestia has placed her magic grip over it. You look back to see her poking her head around the corner. You shout at her to tell you just what she is doing. Before she responds, the bathroom door swings open.

Inside of the bathroom, Luna stands in the shower. Her mane is matted and waterlogged, and her fur drips water plentifully. Not wanting a repeat of your experience with Twilight Sparkle, you avert your eyes. Before you can walk away, you hear Luna shout.

"H-HUMAN! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING!!?"

You look back at her. You see her scrambling to cover herself, throwing one arm over her breasts, and the other over her nether regions. Before you can explain the situation, she lobs a bottle of soap at your head.

"G-GET OUT!!"

Now feeling frustrated with the both of them, you shout the first rebuttal insult that you can come up with. You shout that she should have used the shower curtain.

"IT IS NOT HUNG UP!!"

"WELL, GOOD!"

With this, you slam the door, and exit. You look back at Celestia, who seems to be shying away. You ask her a simple question: Just what exactly did she wish to accomplish with that?

"I was... Hoping that I could get Luna involved in this?"

You inform her that she did, before walking away. If Celestia plans to continue trying to seduce you, then she will have a hefty task on her hands. Until the three of you reconcile, you can rake your brain over just what you should say to Luna to explain why the bathroom door had opened while she was showering. For a bit, though, you'll continue finding yourself being angry at her. Not because she hit you with a bottle of liquid soap. Not because she didn't give you a chance to explain yourself.

It's because the bitch got your bathroom floor wet.