The Road to Romance

Angel liked to think of himself as a very important bunny—or VIB, as he liked to refer to himself—with very important needs. Specifically, at 6:30 every Friday night (or every night, for that matter), he expected a large salad prepared especially for him, complete with a cherry tomato on top.

Unfortunately for him, even VIBs don't always get their way.

Rather than preparing his dinner, his owner/personal chef was busy darting around her cottage, trying her hardest to get ready for her upcoming date. Mascara bottles were thrown everywhere, a couple pictures were knocked off the walls, and there was a thin cloud of face powder fogging up the air. To call it a chaotic scene would be a vast understatement.

Not content with the level of attention his stomach was receiving (i.e. none), Angel decided to take matters into his own paws. Grabbing his favorite bowl, he hopped over to his owner—who was currently checking her dress in the mirror—and shoved it into her side.

Fluttershy didn't so much as blink. "Sorry, Angel, but I can't fix you your salad tonight. There are some carrots in the pantry, though." She leaned toward the mirror and applied a touch more blush. "Will that be alright?"

Angel made a loud whining noise, but gave up on his quest for salad nonetheless. Starting toward the kitchen, he paused when he saw movement outside the window, and moved closer to examine the source of said movement. A rainbow-maned pegasus was standing at the doorway with her hoof raised, as if she were debating whether to knock or not. Angel decided it wasn't his concern—even as a VIB, he rarely got visitors—and made toward the kitchen again.

* * * * * * * * * *

Although she would never admit it to anypony, Rainbow Dash—the greatest, coolest, awesome-est mare in all of Equestria—had never been in a real relationship. She hadn't even really given a thought to romance before Fluttershy had asked her out on a date. After all, why would someone as busy as Rainbow give even a passing thought to something as time-consuming as romance?

The two days she had used to think about her answer had mostly been spent fretting over what the hay she was supposed to do. On the one hoof, a relationship would probably cut into her practice time (not to mention her nap time). Additionally, if she messed it up, she'd risk losing one of her oldest and closest friends.

On the other hoof, though, Fluttershy was probably her best friend. They'd known each other since they were fillies, been through the good and the bad together, and practically knew each other like the back of their hooves. After all, she figured, she couldn't think of anypony better to help her ease into the world of dating than her best friend.

In the end, she decided to give it a shot based on two factors: that she would probably appear significantly cooler with a romantic partner, and that Fluttershy was such a good friend. All Rainbow knew about love was what she read from that one romantic novel she borrowed from Twilight (she'd finished the Daring Do series and decided to pick out a new book using the age-old method of closing her eyes and grabbing a book, a method she would never use again after that day), which wasn't much. From what she could tell, lovers were really sappy and significantly uncool, so she accordingly viewed awesome-ing—a verb only found in the Dash Dictionary, between "awesome" and "awesomeness"—up relationships as a challenge. And if there was one thing Rainbow loved besides napping, it was a challenge.

Despite her excitement at the opportunity to face a new challenge, Rainbow was quite nervous about facing something as daunting as a relationship, which was why she stood frozen at Fluttershy's door, trying to build up the courage to knock. After about five minutes of standing around awkwardly, Rainbow finally raised her hoof to knock...

...Only for it to meet Fluttershy's mane. Fluttershy stood in the now-open doorway, blinking in confusion as to why Rainbow was greeting her with a knock on the head.  Rainbow quickly pulled her hoof back and blushed from embarrassment.

Fluttershy blinked in confusion. "Um, you're here earlier than I expected. I was going to go water my plants one last time."

"Yeah, I had nothing better to do." Rainbow gave a weak shrug. "I'll whip up a cloud for your plants later or something."

Fluttershy nodded in appreciation, and the two stood around in silence, not sure of what to do next.

"So, uh..." Rainbow mumbled, trying to relieve the awkward tension in the air. "Wait, was I supposed to dress up?"

Fluttershy hadn't even noticed that Rainbow not only wasn't wearing a dress like herself, but hadn't seemed to have cleaned herself up at all before leaving. Her mane wasn't exactly messy, but it was in its usual shaggy state rather than being brushed. Additionally, her coat was slightly matted as if she'd been laying in bed before she left. "Um, I suppose not. It's fine, I don't think Le Fleur has a dress code."

"Alright, sweet!" Rainbow pumped her hoof in the air a bit. "So are you ready to go?"

Fluttershy looked back one last time to check on her animals. Angel was standing by the wall, chewing on a carrot. He noticed her looking at him and nodded as if to say he'd be fine. "I guess. Shall we?"

"Sure." Once Fluttershy walked out, Rainbow moved over to her side as if courting her. "Quick question, though."

"Yes, Rainbow Dash?"

"What exactly is Le Fleur?"

* * * * * * * * * *

"...Seriously?" The restaurant that the athlete stood in front of was most certainly not what she had been expecting, although to be fair she wasn't sure what she had been expecting. 'Le Fleur' was a giant, modern-looking restaurant with sleek black walls that were were so highly polished, they reflected their surroundings almost as well as mirrors. Small fountains spurted pristine water on either side of the doors, which were being held open by a young stallion with a pencil-thin moustache and a tuxedo. And to top it all off, there was even a fancy red carpet leading up to the entrance. It was elegant, swanky, and so un-Rainbow.

"Is something wrong, Rainbow Dash?" Her shy companion raised a concerned eyebrow.

"Hm? Oh, nothing's wrong. Guess I just didn't expect it to be so..." Rainbow struggled to find the right word. "Fabulous?"

Fluttershy let out a small giggle. "Well, of course it's fabulous. The Le Fleur franchise is owned by Fancy Pants himself."

"Right, of course." Rainbow couldn't recall who this Fancy Pants guy was, but judging from his name, she wasn't really interested in recalling. "So are we gonna go inside? I'm starved!"

"Sure. After you?" As soon as Fluttershy closed her mouth, Rainbow started in a sprint toward the door. "Wait, Rainbow!"

When they finally caught up at the door, the stallion gave them a curt nod. "Good evening, madames. Do you have a reservation?" Fluttershy nodded and relayed the necessary information. Upon checking his reservation book, he pointed over at a lush sofa in the entrance hallway. "Please have a seat and we shall have your table shortly."

Rainbow once again sped ahead, practically diving onto the couch. She let out a nervous cough upon seeing Fluttershy's slightly disapproving look. "What? Sooner we get inside, sooner we eat, right?"

"I... don't think it works like that, Rainbow." Fluttershy looked around to make sure nobody had been watching before sitting beside Rainbow on the couch.

"Eh, whatever." The two mares sat in silence. After a few minutes and still no sign of their promised table, Rainbow Dash let out a rather loud groan of frustration. "Oh, come on! What the hay's taking so long?"

Fluttershy quickly shushed her.. "Try not to be so loud. I'm sure they're just busy."

As if the waiters themselves had heard Rainbow's complaints (and chances are they had), a fancily-dressed unicorn mare approached them with two menus floating in her magical grasp. "I apologize sincerely for the wait, madames. Your table is ready, please follow me."

Rainbow jumped up excitedly. "Alright, finally!" A few disapproving glares from nearby patrons quickly silenced her. "Oops, sorry. Just a bit hungry."

The waitress escorted the two mares to a table toward the back with a perfect view of the entire restaurant, including the string quartet playing off to the side. That'll come in handy later, Fluttershy thought to herself. She made a mental note to ask them to play a song for Rainbow Dash sometime during the night.

As soon as they sat down, the waitress levitated the menus over to them and took out a small notepad. "Now then, may I ask what you two would like to drink?"

Fluttershy looked over her menu. "Oh, um... I'll have a—"

"Do you guys have any cider?" Rainbow put her menu down and looked up. "I really like cider."

"We have a cider that is distilled from the finest apples that Sweet Apple Acres can provide and then aged to perfection."

Rainbow thought for a second. "That means it's got alcohol in it, right?"

"Er, yes. Our cider is indeed alcoholic."

"Great, I'll take one of those." All the better to help calm my nerves.

"Alright, one cider. And for you, madame?" The waitress turned to Fluttershy, who was still looking through the drink menu.

"I... guess I'll have a wine of the chef's choosing." Fluttershy didn't know much about alcohol, but she figured fancy ponies drank wine so she might as well.

"A wine of the chef's choosing, noted. Your drinks will be out shortly." And with that, the waitress turned around and walked out of sight.

When the silence between the two became unbearable, Fluttershy attempted to start a conversation. "So, um... How's work going?"

Rainbow looked up from examining her hooves. "Eh, same old. Boss says there's another snowstorm coming up soon."

"Oh, that's fascinating."

"Yep. And how are the animals?"

"No different than usual, I suppose." At a loss for conversational topics, Fluttershy chose to instead embrace the following awkward silence.

After a couple minutes of twiddling their hooves, a waiter arrived at their table with a tray balanced on his back. He leaned down in front of Fluttershy, as if asking her to take her drink herself. "One glass of chardonnay for the lady..." After she took her glass, he got up and repeated the process for Rainbow. "...And one mug of cider for the other lady."

The two mares started on their drinks, Fluttershy with dainty sips and Rainbow with the ferocity of a hundred thirsty pegasi. Within ten seconds (a new personal record for the pegasus), Rainbow had finished her mug and was now looking around the immediate area for a waiter. Upon finding one, she flagged him over.

"Hey, can I have another cider?"

"Certainly. Would you rather I bring you two, just in case you finish the first one too quickly?"

Rainbow blinked. She hadn't even thought of that. "Sounds good to me!"

* * * * * * * * * *

Twenty-five minutes and six ciders later, Rainbow Dash was smashed, to put it lightly. Fluttershy hadn't known this, but Rainbow was infamous within the weather team clique for being a lightweight when it came to alcohol. In fact, there was a strict do-not-give-Rainbow-alcohol-or-you'll-be-fired rule in place as a result of the Second Great Thunderstorm. It didn't take a genius, though, to figure out that somepony couldn't handle their liquor - or cider, as it were - when said pony was busy reciting the entire history of the Ponyville weather force a few dozen decibels too loud.

"And then he—" Rainbow paused to hiccup for approximately the billionth time that night (she wasn't good at counting while drunk). "And then he said, 'Why not just kick the clouds?' Noooopony had thought of that, so we built a statue in his honor. I think it's... down in the Main Square?"

"Rainbow Dash, the statue in the Main Square is of Princess Celestia."

"Oh. Well, I knew that." Rainbow dazed off for a few seconds, staring into space. "Hey, I wrote a song. Ya wanna hear it?"

Fluttershy braced herself for what was sure to come. "I'd love to, but maybe lat—"

"Fluttershy is a pretty cool pony!" Rainbow got up from her seat and went into what appeared to be a choreographed dance routine, if swaying from side to side and staggering is considered choreographed dancing. "She's like the best pony in the whole wide... something that rhymes with pony!"

"Rainbow, I really don't think that's a good idea." Fluttershy struggled to make her voice heard over Rainbow, who was currently in the middle of an air drum solo. After failing to get a response, she decided to walk over to Rainbow and tap her on the shoulder. "Rainbow, you should probably sit back down. You're making everypony stare." True to her word, every table in the nearby area was sending them looks of pure vitriol. Luckily, there hadn't been any staff nearby, so they didn't have to worry about being kicked out for the time being.

"Huh-zwha? Ohh, sounds like a great idea. You're so smaaart, Fluttershutter." Rainbow leaned in for a big hug, but tripped after failing to realize Fluttershy was actually about a yard away from her. "Fluuutters, will you carry me to my seat?"

Fluttershy sighed and dragged Rainbow to her seat. Obviously the date wasn't going as she'd planned, but she still had the slightest sliver of hope. After all, she still hadn't checked with the string quartet. A bit of calming music might help to keep her from bursting out like that again, Fluttershy thought idly. "Rainbow Dash, you stay right here. I'm going to go take care of something."

"Mmmmkay, I'll miss you!" Rainbow got up and plopped down in her chair before deciding she was tired and practically faceplanting the table.

Well, hopefully she'll stay put. Don't want any more episodes like that happening tonight. Fluttershy made her way over to the string quartet, who were just wrapping up a song. She walked up to the closest member to the front of the stage, a grey earth pony playing what appeared to be a cello. "Oh, um... Excuse me, miss..."

"It's Octavia, ma'am. And yourself?" The mare extended a hoof, which Fluttershy grasped tentatively in something that almost resembled a hoofshake.

"Um, I'm Fluttershy." The pegasus pulled her hoof back and took a short step back for comfort. "I really liked your performance tonight."

"Oh, really? That's quite kind of you, miss Fluttershy." Octavia cocked her head slightly. "I apologize if I come across as rude, but is that all you came over here for? I believe we're starting our next song soon."

"Oh, no. I was going to ask if you could play a song for a friend of mine. She's had a rough day and she really needs some cheering up."

"I believe we could fit a request into our songlist. Might I ask who this friend is?"

Fluttershy pointed off toward her table, where Rainbow was unsuccessfully trying to spin around in her chair. "She's over there. Her name's Rainbow Da—"

"Oh, I see." Without a further word, Octavia got down from the stage, briskly trotted over to Rainbow's table, and sucker-punched her square in the muzzle.