My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

Episode 2: The Best of the Neon Part 1:

Ahhh… Jesus, I’m here again. And I’m still alive aren’t I? Yup, fucking alive still, what a thrill, isn’t it? You’d think I just commit suicide by now in Neon’s world, but nope. He makes sure to keeps us alive.

I think Forrest tried to hang himself, which is a funny yet sad site to see him do. I mean he was in tears man, like you don’t understand, he felt like there was nothing left for him so he went to the closet located somewhere in the god forsaken Part Store and tried to hang himself.

And he was ready to go, got the good rope, cause if you use the bad rope, then you definitely deserve to die. Have some respect for yourself god damn it. But he got the good rope, tied it up in a Pony Knot, and tied it up around a metal coat hanger bar thingy, whatever those things are called, got on a small chair, and tried to hang himself.

I say funny cause even though it’s just us now and it would be wise for all of us to stick together through this Neon Crises that Neon himself made on us, we still treat Forrest as our punching bag. And in terms of order, Jack is the one who uses him the most, I’m somewhere near the bottom, and Arrell is the last since he has a heart for him in some cases, but uhhh… he does push him to the side every now and then.

Anyways, it’s just funny because… you know… look at him go, but truth be told, even for me it’s kind of sad since one, he’s our punching bag, we need him through this time of crises, or else it’s a threat to democracy or something. And two… ehhhhhh you just can’t help but feel bad for the poor little fella.

He’s trying to hang on to whatever he has got left, even us, and even though you’d think it would be us that would send him to the brink of suicide, it was Neon’s cruel world that sent him overboard. He can’t take the world being colorless. Now you’d think he would use his Fireboom to perhaps maybe get us out of this mess, but Neon just doesn’t burn in the flames that easily as you think.

He is truly a monster of this world and of this universe. But whatever, and as Forrest tried to hang himself, well suffice it to say, Neon bust the door open with a smile like usual and brought him down as soon as Forrest tipped that chair.

And all he said to him, “Where you going there buddy!? You can’t leave the party! We’re friends forever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever…”

And I think he said ever like twenty one more times or something. But whatever, I’m just spit balling here, trying to make conversation with you… journal. Why the fuck am I even writing in a journal anyway? It’s pointless. Eh, whatever, maybe someone might come across this and find out what happened to us if anyone manages to get their hands on this.

Perhaps humans will find this, or maybe demons. Or the Jews, the Space Jews. Note to Space Jews, if you can please get us out of this mess with your Jew Space Magic, We promise to be very good goys and maybe even convert. I know we would be treated as the impure bloods, but it’s better than this life. But then again… even I doubt even the Space Jews can defeat Neon in his current state. If anything, that might just be leading sheep to the slaughter. Anyways, let’s continue on and talk what happened today! Today was… great… just fucking great…

So where should I begin now? Hmmm, I know. We start outside… again… I know, a great place to start everything is outside, even a good ol’ fashioned genocide. Why take the showers inside, when you can do it outside? It’s like magic! Anyways, while pretty much everyone was inside the Party Store, just hanging around, wondering when we will we be free from all of this madness and Neon’s grasp and just trying to pass the time while the world is all but finished dying, we had sent Forrest out to see and scout for shit.

We really didn’t know what we had wanted him to find, we just wanted him to go out and face the world and see how he was when he came back, he mostly came back fucked up though. But anyways, he was walking around what used to be the park area of Stalia, in which case not much had changed since the explosion. Sure it used to look a little bit more alive before the explosion, yet I feel not much had changed since then.

Just goes to show you how much Stalia put money into the looks of the town… let alone the stability of it all. Anyways, the trees were either dead or long gone, the grass was lifeless, the benches were broken in half and burned to a crisp. And to top it off, no birds to sing a lovely tune or a flower to blossom to brighten someone’s day.

It was all just dead and lifeless that park was as of now. Not much to say other than it was a sore to the eyes to look at, perhaps even heartbreaking to see nature go away in a flash just like that. But Forrest, with his head hanging low and his eyes shifting around in worry, making sure to keep an eye out for anything… even Neon since you never knew when he would pop up, was walking slowly along what used to be a path through the park. The constant sounds of sirens in the distance were still there from last time as well as a nearby moaning that no one could not pin point.

And as Forrest was walking along the broken path, he said to himself quietly, “Ohhh… why do the guys keep sending me out on missions like this? One of them could at least come with me to make sure I’m alright. Just keep it together Forrest, you can do this. Just one hoof at a time.”

And then Forrest stopped in his tracks as he had just noticed what appeared to have been an aborted, unborn fetus on the ground, and an unborn fetus that was half way burned to be exact.

It was small and shivered up on the ground, just lying there lifeless with darkened holes where it’s eyes should be at and a tiny mouth. As Forrest spotted this, he didn’t have a shocking look on his face, his face got a little bit more sadder as he looked down and stared upon its lifeless corpse. And as he just stood there for a second, the wind picked up just a bit, with the thoughts of the poor little fetus and what it could have been if it had not been for Neon.

After a few seconds had passed, Forrest just said out loud, by himself, “Poor little guy. Wish things weren’t like this way. But they are. Hope you’re somewhere better and far from here at least. I’m sure the parents would have loved you though, as well as the world.”

And then something unexpected happened as the unborn fetus started to move its mouth and talk a bit as it moaned and groaned at the same time, but at a very high pitched, baby kind of way if you could imagine.

It said, “Eeeehhhh Ma…ma… Ma…ma… Ma…ma… where… my… ma… ma… Eeeehhhhh…”

It had said all very slowly too. And as for Forrest, his eyes opened wide and now his face was shocked since he didn’t expect the undead to come back to life.

But since there was some weird type of radiation in the air, the kind that oddly didn’t kill us surprisingly, probably because of Neon, it would make sense that the unborn fetus was alive. Or hell maybe it was Neon’s doing. Either way, Forrest was scared shitless so he immediately used his wings and flew the fuck out of there.

And as he used his wings to fly at high speeds, he went straight back to the Party Store and crashed through the doors of the store. And once he did, he landed perfectly on the ground, very suddenly as it caught all of our attention and we all had our eyes on him with a look of curiosity as well.

And as Forrest had came what felt like him crashing through, he was breathing a bit heavily as well as he said somewhat frantically, “You guys! You won’t believe what I found out there!”

He was saying it in a scarred, yet a tone of urgency as well.

Arrell then asked him, “What, you saw a creepy looking figure out in the distance again?”

Forrest then responded to him with, “No! I saw a baby that was just sitting out there. I thought it was dead, but then it came back to life!”

I then said to Forrest, “So a zombie then? Yeah nothing new Forrest, we’ve came across those already and frankly it’s getting old.”

I had said it with a look of tiredness, but that mellowed out kind of tiredness, where everything is ok, but annoyed.

And then Jack spoke up and said to him, “Pfft… pussy.”

Mac then said with an annoyed look on his face, “Yeah, I thought you had saw some walking talking apples or something! I bet those things know what happened to around these here parts!”

I then looked to Mac and told him, “Yeah you don’t want to meet those apples. In fact I hope those things are dead.”

Mac then asked me, “What?”

I then told Mac, “Forget what I just said.”

I then turned my attention towards Forrest and his little problem as I said to him, “Look Forrest, it was just a zombified unborn fetus, not the boogeyman. Now let’s just move on with life, no one cares about your post first world problems.”

Forrest then came to terms what I had told him and made a little wimping sound with it while hanging his head a little bit low. But then he started to look around the place and noticed someone was missing.

Forrest then asked curiously, “Hey… where’s Neon at?”

And then the speak of the devil came at the right time as Neon busted through the doors behind him, as that then made Forrest jump up as he was startled and screeched a bit. He then of course turned around to see Neon, as well as all of our attention towards him as well.

Neon, with the smile as usual said to Forrest as soon as he busted through the doors, “Hey Forrest, guess what!?”

Forrest then asked him while holding his left hoof up a little bit in the air and nervously asked, “What?”

Neon then pointed towards him with his right hoof and told him, “You’re the Friend of the month!”

Forrest then said to him, “Ohhh… ok then…”

And then there was just silence as the wind passed us by and we just sat there and gave a look of awkwardness towards Neon. And as for Neon, he raised his head a little bit and went crossed eye during the few seconds of awkward silence. As for me, I just raised my right eyebrow, wondering where this was going to.

And then Neon broken his silence as then he went un-cross eyed and asked all of us, “Guess what I found!”

And then Neon twisted his arms to this back of him and somehow stretched it outward enough, Neon I guess, all without turning his body, and then came back and grabbed a somehow still alive adult pony corpse that was pretty much half a zombie and was burned all the way to a black charcoal. He had pulled the corpse, that was still alive and just barely standing, yet you couldn’t tell who it used to be at all, in front of himself.

And from there, Neon stood on his back two legs and proceeded to control the pony corpse’s two front arms with having pony corpse also stand p on its back two legs as Neon continued to say with a smile as he poked his head around its right shoulder, “Its name is Sunburst!”

And Sunburst the practically dead pony corpse just gave out a long, moaning groaning sound, not saying a word. It was as if he sounded like an old guy that was in constant pain.

And then Neon continued to speak for Sunburst as he then said to Forrest, “He says that he wants to challenge you to a competition! Whoever does the worst wins! Now let’s go you guys!”

Forrest was hesitant to speak up, but he then said to neon, “B-But I don’t want to though.”

Neon then said with smile again, “Let’s go you guys!”

Forrest then said, “No.”

He had said it in a very insecure kind of way, almost as if he was unsure of himself.

But then Neon just said to him, “I said let’s go you guys,” all with a smile as always.

Forrest then said, “But I…”

Neon then cut him off as Neon’s eyes went back to being entirely black with a red pupil and his voice changed to that of a demon’s voice as he then said to Forrest, “I said get outside now or else I’m devouring your soul through your eyes tonight!”

Forrest with his eyes being big as he was scared for his life, and a little bit for us as well since we would be involved somehow, then said to him quickly, “Ok, I’m going.”

OUTSIDE, SOMEWHERE IN THE MIDDLE OF STALIA…

So we were all outside, out in the open, as we kept our distances. And of course Wolf was still in the corner chilling as well. He is taking this all too well I’d say. Anyways, Forrest and Neon, while holding his new pet that he named Sunburst by the armpits, were standing out, a few feet apart. There was a can in front of Forrest and Sunburst.

And then Neon said out loud, “Whoever can pick up the can first loses!”

Forrest, who had a worried look up until now, started to smile a bit as he had gotten the thought in his head a little bit it had seemed, really I don’t know, I’m just guessing since I can’t read minds. Yeah, maybe I should explain how I’m getting all of this. While I can’t escape the hands of fate that is also Neon, I got bored and made a up a spell that can basically show the events up to twenty four hours within this world, and a little outward. I can still do that kind of magic, but I do need to keep it a secret since… I’m sure Neon doesn’t like it.

Or maybe he does know, but either way, it’s the best that I’ve got. Magic doesn’t affect Neon after all…

Anyways, back to what was happening, Forrest was thinking to himself probably how it easy this was to him and wasn’t some weird or crazy thing to him as he had a little smile on him. And then he looked slightly over towards Neon for a bit, before looking back down at the unlabeled metal tin can, to which he then used his left hoof and picked it up from the ground.

And as Forrest had done so, he had rolled his eyes, in a nice way and said to Neon, “Oh no, I guess I lose and…”

Forrest was quickly cut off as the can’s top then unexpectedly opened as a bunch of baby spiders started to crawl out of it. And it then of course started to devour Forrest which then prompted Forrest to run around, fly a bit, screaming as the little baby spiders just crawled all over him.

As Forrest went, “AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!,” all over the place, Neon was just staring off into empty space as he had forced Sunburst the Corpse to try and pick up the can without much effort.

He did not.

So Neon just said, while staring off into space, “Looks like Sunburst couldn’t pick it up since it was too heavy for him! That means he loses and wins this challenge! Next!”

BACK AT THE PARTY STORE…

You’d think Neon would just keep it all in one place, but nope. Well what happened next was that we all went up to an empty, white wall in the store with what looked like a bucket of red paint with a paintbrush in it next to Forrest and Sunburst the Corpse.

As for us, we again just stayed the fuck back as much as we could without pissing off Neon. Neon had then said to Forrest, “The next challenge is a fun one! Whoever paints the worst picture on the wall with children’s blood wins!”

Forrest’s eyes just popped again as he looked at disgust at the blood near him on the ground.

He then said to himself, “Children’s blood?”

Forrest didn’t move, he didn’t feel good as his face started to turn green as his mouth was slightly opened.

Arrell then asked Forrest, “Uhh… Forrest, are you alright?”

However Forrest didn’t respond back as he just then abruptly puked up huge chunks all over the wall for a couple of quick seconds. The wall was then covered in green vomit, as the vomit spilled a little bit on his chin and on to his hooves.

Forrest didn’t look too well as he looked a bit dazed and confused. As for Neon however, he made Sunburst the Corpse grab the paint brush and draw a little smiley face with the children’s blood.

In which turn Neon said with a smile, “This picture is the worst with Children’s Blood! That means Sunburst wins this round… again!”

And the strangely Sunburst the Corpse, still moaning and groaning, spoke two little words just barely and said, “Kill me…”

Don’t we all… am I right?