Go F*** Yourself, Twilight Sparkle
Twilight Sparkle was enjoying a nice little wet dream when the moment that would change her entire life occurred.
Twisted up in her sheets, she was furiously rubbing circles around her clit while dreaming the most lurid of dreams. Spike was dressed up in one of Rarity’s best dresses, and Twilight was pouring hot wax all over her dick. You see, in most of her dreams she was not Twilight Sparkle. Instead, she was Futa-Twi, the biggest-dicked mare in Equestria. Perhaps she should’ve seen a psychiatrist about that.
Ramming Spike’s tiny pert asshole, the not-dream Twilight was nearly at her climax. However, the sun was just about to rise, and soon the night would be over. Luna would step down, and Celestia would step up.
Speaking of Sunbutt, Princess Celestia was lurking outside the window. What was she doing there, you ask? Fuck you, I’m not your personal textbook, I don’t have all the answers.
But if you must know, she was snorting crack with the squirrels.
Celestia shimmied up the side of Twilight’s Treehouse and peeked her bloodshot gaze through the window, looking down at her faithful student tussling with her purple pony poontang.
“SUNRISE, MOTHAFUCKA,” Celestia bellowed, and the sun rose in exactly two seconds, sending its harsh ray right into Twilight’s poor eyes.
“AAAAH!” screamed the purple unicorn. “MY UNICORNEAS!”
“Rise and shine, Twilight,” Princess Celestia said in a sing-songy voice that sounded more like a hooker coughing up cum-stained phlegm. “You’ve got some new shit to deal with!”
“Like what?” Twilight asked innocently.
“LIKE THIS NEW GIANT FUCKING DICK!” Celestia screeched, causing several windows to shatter, and giving Spike irreparable ear damage. Twilight waiting for the ringing to leave her head, and then turned to Celestia.
“Princess, are you feeling ok? Normally, you don’t—” Twilight stopped speaking when she felt a tingling in her ta-ta.
Lifting up the covers, Twilight saw that she was now in the possession of a foot long, flaccid purple dick.
“Oh my gosh! It’s a dream come true!” Twilight weeboed everywhere, become flaccid and spaghetti like in consistency, similar to her large penis. She wibbled and wobbled out of bed, sliding all across the floor in excitement of her new genitalia.
“I can finally sex Spike’s butthole properly!” Twilight stole a sexy glance over at the pet bed where she made Spike sleep, since it was too self-esteem building to give him a proper bed. Didn’t want him to stand up for himself or anything, that would crimp her style.
However, like any self-respecting pony, this gave Twilight a raging ~~bender~~ boner. It grew in size quite quickly, and shot straight up due to the massive amount of blood that was being pumped into it. As her penis was quite large, it smacked her right in the face.
“Ow!” Twilight said, rubbing her throbbing eye and trying to ignore her throbbing other part. It’s true what Grandma Sparkle always said: you have to be careful with a giant cock or else you’ll take your eye out.
“Well, now that I’ve got this giant erection, which actually shouldn’t be possible since I didn’t think I had nearly this much blood in my body to support such a boner, I shall have to pound Spike’s tiny tailhole until I cum out of his mouth,” Twilight murmured to herself, coming to the same conclusion any of you would if you were put in her place. Don’t deny it, you know you would.
However, before Twilight could get all freaky with her assistant, another thought crossed her mind. What if she sucked her own dick? It’s not like she was going to get another opportunity like this...
“Yes,” she said, changing her plans to better suit her interests. “I shall suck my own cock! I will face fuck myself, and it will be glorious!”
So, Twilight sat down on her haunches and took her massive dick in her mouth. It tasted rubbery, but also slightly tangy, like an orange that had been left in a ninth grader’s backpack for far too long.
She set to work, slobbering and sucking and using other s words to stimulate her supple sausage so that it would spurt sperm. Twilight didn’t know how she planned on achieving ejaculation since the princess hand’t bestowed her any balls, and her vagina was in the same place it always was, but she figured that she would cross that bridge once she reached it.
Her cock was now prodding the back of her throat, so Twilight bobbed her head outward a bit to take one last gulp of air before returning to sucking on her own shaft. Droplets of her saliva fell onto her chest from her tongue, which was hugging the bottom of her mighty phallus.
Suddenly, a strange sensation began to build inside her. It was not unlike the pressure that came before a normal vaginal orgasm, and yet it was completely different. It makes sense if you think about it.
Then, with a mighty grunt, Twilight came. Her pussy squirted out its fine selection of natural juices, and the same-yet-different pressure that had been building up moments before was suddenly released in a double euphoria. Something coursed up her cock, and it burst into her mouth. Gallons of thick, creamy jizz poured into her mouth, and her expression changed to one of utmost surprise. The cum burst from her mouth as her cheeks were filled. Twilight tried to swallow it all, but it just kept coming, as was the typical porn cliché.
Twilight pulled her dick from her mouth with a muffled pop, and coughed up the penis paste that she hadn’t been able to swallow. Her giant futa-dick have a mighty heave, and a humungous rope of cum shot out from the end, covering her face. Soon, after more heaves and more ejaculation, the poor mare was nearly completely covered with sperm.
Spike groggily opened his eyes. “Twilight? What’s going—” A jet of baby batter hit Spike right in his face. “OH GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH!”
Adam blinked groggily. “Oh man, for a minute there, I lost myself. Gotta stop all that sexy daydreaming I do. Wouldn’t it be cool if Twilight did suck her own dick though?” The young adult smiled to himself, reflecting on the sexy daydream he had just experienced. “Now, what was I doing?”
He looked down to see a gun in his hands, and he looked over to see his destination. “Oh, that’s right!” Adam Lanza then happily skipped his way over to Sandy Hook Elementary School, ready for an exciting day.
