A Shadow From Starlight

Shadow wandered listlessly through dimly lit streets, noting through the brownish fog that all the stores were closed. Since she wasn’t really interested in purchasing any wares, this didn’t faze her. She didn’t even know why she was walking, she just was. She just walked through the continuous fog, the only sound being her hoof impacting the cobblestone-paved road. Having nothing else to do she meandered up to the nearest store, cupping her hooves on the windowpane in order to see into the darkened interior better.

Inside, she saw a gathering of ponies. Sort of. Their shape resembled ponies, but it was in fact hard to narrow down what their exact dimensions were. Most of them appeared to be made up of some sort of black smoke, constantly changing in size and density as the smoke billowed in a wind that was unfelt by Shadow. Some of them had more or less solid bodies with faces she recognized, while others were completely unrecognizable.

The gathering dispersed, with the entities departing either solo or in small groups. Each group went to separate buildings, with Shadow watching on, intrigued. She ended up a group of six whom seemed the most recognizable. Where had she seen them before? They entered a large stone building with a singular pane of glass over the front. Shadow approached it, trying the doorknob. Locked. She was relegated to watching from the outside.

Inside, the group further split up into two groups, one of four and one of two. Shadow watched on, quite curious now. Slowly, she realized there was something wrong. There was a pack of pitch-black animals circling around the group of four. Shadow began shouting at the group inside, unable to gain their attention. The pack of animals closed in, swarming two of the group of four, dragging them into the darkness where their screaming abruptly ceased.

“No! Listen! You have to listen to me! Hey, why can’t you hear me? I can hear you!” Shadow shouted through the window, thrashing it with her hooves, unable to gain the attention of the ponies inside. She dropped back a second, pacing for a few furious moments, trying to think of a way to signal them. She set back into the strongest buck she could give, releasing a savage kick on the window pane. All she got for her trouble was a broken ankle. Shadow collapsed on the ground in pain, pulling herself upright to see into the window once again.

Only one of the original four remained, and the pack roamed all around him, poking and prodding. At the last second, one of the pack lunged forward, catching the victim by the throat and dragging it off into the darkness where the pack got down to its messy work. The two remaining went to investigate. Shadow pounded on the pane, trying one last time to warn them. No luck. Their fate met was met in a similarly grisly fashion as the previous victims. The pack shifted its gaze away from its victims. Shadow could feel their gaze lock on to her. She backed away from the window, noting that they had dropped their heads and begun charging towards her. Silent and swift, the black ponies charged forward, malice in their minds.

Shadow averted her face from flying glass shards as they smashed the pane from the inside, making a flying leap onto the pavement below. The one in the front shook itself off, sending bits of blood and intestine flying every which way. Shadow finally got a good, unobstructed look at it for the first time. It was her. They were all her. Jet black, same body, same facial structure. But yet, they were obviously malevolent. Shadow turned sharply on her hooves, trying to make a dash for an alleyway, but her broken ankle tripped her, causing her to fall flat on her face.

“Heh heh heh, what do we have here?” Said the first Shadow, the only one with red eyes. There were four of her, each one with a different eye color. Though they didn’t seem like eyes at all, more like lights. Each glowed with a fierce intensity that made it hard to look at steadily, as if somepony had kindled the hottest of fires behind the eyes of these shadows of Shadow. They circled her slowly, like wolves closing for the kill, heads lowered slightly in an aggressive posture. She looked at them all, noting a sort of pecking order. Yellow seemed to give way to Orange, who gave way to Red, who gave way to Black.

“Looks like mommy has decided to come and join us for the hunt,” Yellow said jokingly, baring its teeth in a savage smile. It sounded like Shadow, but it had its own distinct quality that was hard for Shadow to distinguish.

“As if. Precious mommy only lets us feed on the rarest of occasions. We’re usually subjugated to giving intermittent suggestions that you always ignore,” Black said with a snarl. Her eyes were different than the others. It was is as if they were simultaneously sucking in all light that went near them and spewing out your worst nightmares. The effect was emphasized by the seeping fog that crept from its eye sockets to taint the floor upon which it walked.

“I’m sorry, have we met?” Shadow said meekly.

“Don’t play with us. You are us. We are you. You know what we want,” Orange said with a growl, breathing heavily on her neck, gnashing its sharpened teeth.

“Wait,” Yellow said with a sniff. “There’s something different with her. Her sleep is aided by something she ate,” Yellow spat. The other ponies straightened up at Yellow’s words, their moods souring even further than their already less-than-amiable level.

“She may actually not remember who we are,” Red murmured to Black. Black responded with a hostile bite in Red’s direction, a reminder to the order of the pack and who told who what to do.

“So you say you don’t remember us. Very well, we shall re-introduce ourselves, just this once.” Black nodded to Yellow.

“I’m Contempt,” it said.

“Since when does contempt turn to violence?” Shadow ventured.

“On those glorious moments you let me run free. Remember fifteen years ago when you let me butcher those stupid fillies who thought they were better than us, but never came close to our grades? I remember. I remember they never found the bodies. But I remember where they are. I think about it every day as the proudest moment of my life.”

“And I’m Control,” said Orange. Seeing Shadow’s confused look, Control continued. “When you feel like you’re starting lose control of the situation, I take over. Like when those fillies made fun of you for not having a cutie mark. I dealt with them. They never insulted you again,” Control said with a sinister smile.

“I’m Rage,” Red seethed.

“No explanation necessary there,” Shadow said to herself. “And you?” she said to Black.

“I’m everything they try to be and fail. You can call on me whenever you want. I’m plentiful wherever you go, and I’m in every situation.” Shadow thought for a second.

“You’re the worst of their traits combined?” Black nodded. “You’re Pure Evil?” Evil nodded again, showing its razor sharp teeth through its sinister grin.

“We are you, we are the voices in your head. We are always there for you, and are in your dreams every night.” Evil nodded to her compatriots, they moved in a little closer than Shadow would have liked. “We’re here for you ever single night. Remember girls, we can’t kill her.” Shadow suddenly became very uneasy. Evil directed her attention back at Shadow. “This is for never using us, even though we are always ready.” A hoof smashed down on her broken ankle, twisting and grinding it into the ground. Shadow howled in pain, arching her back in agony. Rage set in, ripping her stomach wide open. Evil leaned over her head.

“Remember us,” gripping hold and removing an ear. Control lunged forward, tearing at her neck.

*** *** *** *** ***

“Yeaaargh!” Shadow leapt from the sofa, clutching her throat.

Shadow's blood-curdling scream woke up Twilight faster than if Spike had told her Celestia was coming over with a pop quiz. Even Spike sat upright in surprise. Once he deduced there was no immediate danger, he flopped back onto his bed, fast asleep. Twilight stumbled down the stairs, half asleep. Her words were slurred for the first few minutes from sleep.

"Shaduh, whaths wrong?" Shadow squirmed frantically, trying to push away the invisible jowls that clamped down on her throat. Her hooves flailed around before her neck, slapping away her unseen attacker. In an instant, the bite released. All was back to normal, except that she must have appeared epileptic to Twilight.

"Uh, nothing. Just a bad nightmare," She said bashfully, pushing her mane which had been whipped into a mess during her frenzy away from her face.

"You sthure?"

"I am sure," Shadow said. Twilight shook her head vigorously, creating a similarly disarrayed mane, but in the process clearing her mind from its sleepy stupor.

"Well, if you need me to, I can go into your mind with you and help you process some images. I learned that spell a while ago, while browsing the Starswirl the Bearded wing."

"No!" Shadow said, perhaps too harshly. "I mean, it's really not necessary. Just a silly dream." Twilight looked at her askance.

"You can never tell with dreams. Sometimes they mean more than you think."

"Well in this case, I can assure you it was harmless."

"Care to talk about it?"

"Oookay..." Shadow said slowly. She could discuss most of the dream without revealing too much.

"Great! I'll pour us some drinks!" Shadow sat down at the dining room table in the Library/House combination.

"So... why is there a kitchen in a library?" Shadow asked curiously.

"To be frank, I don't really know," Twilight responded. "I was given permission to live here, and all of these rooms and accommodations existed prior to my residence. My only theory is that it was a house converted into a library." Shadow nodded in agreement of her sensible conclusion. "So," Twilight said, sitting down with a pair of mugs with piping hot Chai tea. "Tell me about your dream."

“Well, ok.” Shadow took a sip of her tea before delving into her half-truths. “It started off in a fog. A dark fog. Not black, more of a brownish color I think. Anyways, I was walking down empty streets.”

“Of Ponyville?”

“No, not Ponyville. I don’t remember. It may not even be a real place, it was just a city. Or town. Something with lots of shops.” Twilight nodded, and Shadow continued. “Well, was walking here and there without purpose, just kind of… um…”

“Wandering listlessly?” Twilight suggested.

“Sure,” Shadow shrugged, not really sure what Twilight had said. “Anyways, I decided to walk up to one of the stores, and that’s when it got weird.”

“The fog or empty streets weren’t weird?”

“No… should they be?”

“It’s different for everypony.”

“Well, this wasn’t that bad. At least not yet.”

“So what happened next?”

“Well, then through the store window I saw a snowy place. And six stallions. Guards, maybe.” Why was she telling Twilight all this! Way too much detail! She had to dial it back a bit, hopefully she didn’t give away enough that Twilight would figure it out. She seemed smart enough to be able too.

“Why do you say that they were guards?”

“Well, they seemed to be walking around something. Like they were patrolling. Anyways, while they were patrolling, a pack of animals came and killed them all one by one.”

“How do you know they were killed?”

“Well, they were screaming for a while until a bone snapped, then the screaming stopped. Another time, they ripped out the throat of a guard. You see, they-” Shadow looked up from demonstrating with her hooves to see Twilight’s mortified expression. “The details aren’t important. But the guards were dead, no doubt about it.”

“And that’s your dream?”

“It’s some of it. Should I continue?”

“Yes, please.”

“Well, then they turned towards me. They looked at me through the glass, and started coming after me. They broke the glass and started circling around me. There were four of them, one with red, yellow, orange, and then one with black eyes.”

“They circled you? Did they attack you?”

“Eventually, yeah. For a bit, they talked to me.” Shadow yelled at herself internally. Twilight didn’t need to know that! Way too much detail! She was going to figure it out for sure, unless Shadow somehow fixed the situation! Kill her. Hide the body. Nopony can know. “But for the life of me, I can’t remember what they said. Then they attacked, and that’s when I woke up,” Shadow finished quickly with a strained grin. Twilight narrowed her eyes slightly.

“Are you sure that’s everything?”

“Yup!” Kill her!

“Well if you remember anything else, please let me know. I’ll see if I can do some research and figure out if those are recurring symbols or images that tend to mean something.”

“Oh, you don’t need to do that! It’s just a silly nightmare.”

“That was anything but silly. That would have been terrifying! I’ll see what I can do to help a friend.”

“It’s really not necessary.”

“Nonsense!”

“No seriously, please don’t.” Twilight stopped mid stride, suddenly perplexed and intensely curious.

“Um, ok, I guess...” Twilight said, relenting unwillingly. Shadow sighed.

“I have had a bad past. If you dig into that stuff, it might tell you some stuff you don’t want to know. Or at least I don’t want you… or anypony to know. Please don’t.” Twilight’s eyes narrowed.

“What kind of bad?”

“Lots of… pain?”

“Abuse?”

“What? I… uh…”

“Your Dad abused you!” Twilight exclaimed, before muttering a few choice words under her breath about the ‘kinds of stallions that would do such horrible things.’ Shadow breathed a sigh of relief.

“Look, just don’t tell anypony.”

“Shadow, you should know I would never do such a thing!”

“Twilight, we’ve known each other for less than a day!” Twilight raised a hoof before sighing in defeat.

“Point. But still, I would never do that. In fact, I’ve counseled many ponies with similar problems. She may not show it, but Rainbow Dash had a similar background.”

“I doubt it,” Shadow muttered.

“Well if you ever want to talk about it, I’m always available.”

“Thanks, but no thanks.” Shadow shook her head.

“Well, I’m going to guess you won’t be wanting to sleep again tonight,” Twilight said. Shadow nodded vigorously. “You can make yourself home, make whatever you want to eat. The girls and I are going out today at around 10:00. Do you want to come along?”

“I dunno, I really shouldn’t stay in the same place too long.”

“Shadow, don’t even try to pull that nomad crap on us. We’ll tie you down if it means helping a friend.”

“Well if you put it that way, then I guess I can hang out with you guys, for a few more days I mean.”

“That’s a start,” Twilight said with a yawn. “Well, I’m going to go back to bed until a reasonable hour. Don’t worry about making noises, Spike’s a solid sleeper, and I will be wearing earplugs.”

“Alright, goodnight! Er, morning…” Shadow said, her voice trailing off as she glanced at the clock on the wall, suddenly realizing how early it actually was. She looked at Twilight with grateful eyes for getting up at such an ungodly hour to help out—for all intents and purposes—a complete stranger.

*** *** *** *** ***

Shadow felt immensely out of place in the crowd. The throng of other ponies felt almost claustrophobic to her; immeasurably long solitary confinement had a way of forcing ponies to be less socially graceful. She hurried to keep up with her compatriots who were busy chatting and having a grand ol’ time. Well, to be fair, some were having a better time than others. For instance, Rarity seemed entirely in her element. While the colorful one—was it Rainbow Brash?—whatever her name was, she seemed to be enjoying the time only because she was with her friends and not because she was enjoying the shopping. Shadow bolted around a group standing stock still in one of the aisles, still trying desperately to keep up with the other ponies. Oddly enough, it was Rainbow Brash who noticed that Shadow was lagging behind.

“Hey guys, wait up! We’re leaving Shadow behind.”

“Excuse me, excuse me, pardon me,” Shadow muttered, timidly working her way through the crowd. Sweet Celestia, this was so uncomfortable.

“Oh! Shadow dear, I’m so sorry! I didn’t think that you haven’t been shopping here before!”

“Actually, I don’t remember ever shopping. I’ve kind of been in a…” Shadow looked to Twilight for guidance.

“A coma.”

“A coma,” Shadow copied before continuing, “for the last few years, and I don’t remember much of anything.”

“Never been shopping… ever?” By Rarity’s reaction, you could have sworn that Shadow had just said that genocide was her favorite pastime.

“Erm, yes?”

“What is wrong with me? I simply must show you the best places for everything, how, when, where, and why to shop, and how to get the best deals on the latest fashion. I can’t believe we just let you fall behind, an inexperienced shopper in this crowd would have been certainly eaten alive by the unscrupulous vendors.”

“Well then thank Rainbow Brash for noticing I was falling behind. I doubt I would have caught up to you otherwise.” Dash chuckled.

“It’s ‘Dash.’ Rainbow Dash. The one and only!” Dash struck a heroic pose.

“Oh Ah don’t know, Ah could get used t’ callin’ you Rainbow Brash. Seems t’ fit,” AJ cut in with a snicker.

“Don’t you even dare.”

“Or what? Ah control the cider ‘round here.” Dash opened her mouth but immediately snapped it shut, thinking it wiser not to protest but just suffer in silence lest her precious drink be stolen from her.

“New nickname! Brashie!” Pinkie Pie bounded in from nowhere, with a ridiculously happy grin on her face. New nicknames are always awesome.

“See what you’ve done?” Dash said at Shadow, hanging her head slightly and walking towards the nearest food stand.

“Wait! Dashie! I didn’t mean it!” Pinkie Pie looked crestfallen that she hurt her friend. Good-natured pranks are one thing, but when the other pony starts actually being hurt by it, it isn’t fun anymore.

“Should I…” Shadow asked the remaining four.

“Nah, they’ll be fine,” AJ said confidently.

“Are you sure?” Fluttershy’s soft voice poked into the conversation.

“Positive.” Shadow would have continued on about how she felt bad for what had happened to Rainbow Dash but Rarity had already moved on.

“Shadow, come on! I just found a gown for you that will be fantastic!” She hissed the last word hoping her emphasis would hurry the posse onwards. That essentially set the tone for the next three hours. Rarity dashed from stall to stall looking at various gowns, socks, hats, scarves, jewelry, and everything in between. By the time they were done and safely back at Rarity’s boutique, Shadow felt ready to collapse. But oh no. This was only the beginning. Now they had to try on everything. They had to match the best with the best and discard the rest. Shadow eyed the towering pile of clothes with a twinge of fear. Here we go.

“Shadow dear, I seem to have forgotten ribbon for your mane. Would you go grab it for me?”

“Sure. Where is it?”

“Upstairs closet, third door on the left.” She said rapidly, before returning to the pile of clothing through which she had to sort to find the perfect dress. And if she couldn’t find one, she might have to suffer through making a custom one. Shadow trotted upstairs, head bobbing from left to right counting doors.

“One, two, ah here we go.” She opened the door with a swipe of the hoof, allowing the light from the hallway to illuminate the otherwise unlit interior. She peered in cautiously, half expecting the darkness to come jumping out at her to consumer her. She cautiously stepped inside, careful to step only in the light. Shadow scanned the semi-organized shelves for the ribbon. She immediately cursed at herself for not asking her what color of ribbon to get. She turned to go back downstairs to gather the specifics, when a box caught her eye.

Shadow stopped, turning back towards the shelf, pushing her head a little closer to the box, trying to make out what it said.

“Ribbons,” She mouthed. She readied herself to plunge her head into darkness, but she couldn’t just back down. These ponies were actually being nice to her for a change. It was so weird that ponies were doing that to her. It just felt… normal. She had never been normal. She had never been in a situation where normal had been an option. Had it not been for the voices constantly whispering in her ear, she might have forgotten that she was a serial killer. She took a deep breath, reached her head in, snagging it with her mouth and then pulled it back rapidly. The voices rose to a shouting level, before reducing to whispers as she re-emerged. At least that was over.

The door swung shut with a clack.

Shadows head snapped to where the shut door with dread, her only link to sanity was cut off. The voices built inside her head at an alarming rate, within seconds her mouth began moving of its own accord.

“Yes, freedom. Now, who should we kill first?”

“The blue! She makes me so angry! I just want to rip her throat out and laugh as she gasps for a breath that will never come!”

“No, the purple. She is getting to close! She’ll discover us!” Shadow felt herself shrinking to the recesses of her mind. She spent all of her remaining energy in a desperate attempt.

“What are we doing?” Evil shouted. Shadow spun, sending a crushing blow to the door, breaking the locking mechanism and the upper hinge. One of Shadow’s legs stuck to the door, a black aura surrounding. As the door swung wildly, it pulled her upside down into the brightly lit hall. She lay stock still, fighting to regain her body.

“What’s going on up here?” Twilight bounded up the stairs, closely followed by all the others.

“What happened? Shadow, I asked you to get ribbon, not start a fight with my house! Though, it does appear that you won,” Rarity added.

“Why is your hoof stuck to the door?” Rainbow Dash said bluntly.

“Huh?” Shadow said, finally regaining her ability to talk.

“And did your eyes just change color?” Shadow frantically wiped her eyes.

“I don’t think so, see?” She fervently prayed her eyes were back to their normal blue.

“Weird, I must have imagined it.” Twilight went up to the hoof stuck to the door, covered in a black magical aura. Twilight examined it closely.

“Black, interesting…” she muttered. “Aren’t you going to release the magic?”

“I don’t know how. I never could figure it out before p—before the thing.” She cursed at herself for almost saying ‘before prison.’

“Hey! I was trying to do homework over here! Could you keep it down plea—what the-”

“Sweetie Belle, don’t you dare finish that sentence,” Rarity went from concerned friend to cross, older sister in a heartbeat.

“But seriously! What is going on out here?” Shadow let out a fake smile.

“Heh… hi! I’m Shadow, your sister is trying to help me out with dresses and stuff.”

“And you had to break the closet to do that?”

“Umm… yes?”

“Don’t lie,” chided Applejack.

“Ok, fine. The door closed, and I kind of… don’t like… the dark,” Shadow said, hanging her head. Rainbow Dash cut in, her ever-so-caring center shining brightly.

“Kind of? You broke a door to get out of it! I’m not sure if I should laugh or be impressed.”

“Don’t laugh at her, it’s obviously fairly serious,” said Fluttershy.

“To be scared of the dark? Only fillies are scared of the dark.”

“But Rainbow Dash, from her perspective, she was a filly, woke up, and is who she is now.”

“Oh. I didn’t really think about that.”

“Ya rarely do.”

“Thanks, AJ. Good to know I’m appreciated ‘round here.”

“Anytime.”

“The last thing she remembers is being a filly? Is that why she doesn’t have a cutie mark?” Asked Sweetie Belle.

“Wait, what?” Twilight’s attention was immediately pulled from the black aura to this new piece of information. She stared at Shadow’s flank for a few seconds before making a mental note that she had been remarkably unobservant of late. She might need to read a book on how to be more aware. Honestly, this was a bit much. How could she have not noticed that! “No cutie mark, black aura, possible eye color shift, interesting…” She knows. Kill her now. Shadow felt her hoof twitch toward Twilight’s throat. Shadow exploded off the ground in a burst of scrambling speed.

“Sorry, gotta go, bye!” She shouted over her shoulder, barreling downstairs and out into the streets. She glanced around the streets, trying to figure out which way was the fastest to the nearest sharp stick to impale herself with. She should just off herself now, save the Royal Guard the trouble of tracking her down and executing her for murdering an entire village.

“Shadow, wait!” Twilight hollered at the top of her lungs, sprinting out of the boutique and cutting off the road back into town. Well, time to go the other direction. Shadow took off at top speed, heading overland towards the mountains. Twilight took off in pursuit, quickly outpaced by Rainbow Dash and Applejack. Shadow sped into the hills, catching the faint sound of a river. Hopefully there was something to kill herself with there.

Shadow’s legs were killing her, she had never had the chance to run this far or this hard before in her life, but she somehow managed to keep a lead on the two athletes, but they were closing fast. She pushed herself up the next hill, her legs about to fail. Panting, she noticed a cliff just a little bit further. Giving her last bit of energy into a final sprint, she took off for the edge. Applejack was gaining, still just out of reach of Shadow’s hind legs.

“Shadow! What are ya doin’! Oh no, Shadow don’t!” AJ dove, tripping up her hind legs. Shadow stumbled, collapsing on her side, inches from the edge. AJ stood back up, making another lunge for Shadow as she rolled off the edge. “Drat! Dash! Catch her!”

Shadow had never felt so free. The wind whipped her mane about her face as she plummeted downwards, but the voices were gone. They had accepted their fate, and so had she. She closed her eyes in bliss.

“Got her!” Two strong hooves grab one of her limbs as she fell, halting her plunge.

“No! Let me fall!” She struggled, thrashing about violently. Her horn smacked one of Dash’s hooves, causing her to lose her grip.

“Argh!” Sweet freedom. This was what the voices inside her had always wanted. Freedom. Now that she tasted it, she understood their impassioned cries. Shadow frowned, the sensation of falling suddenly stopped. Was she dead? She hadn’t felt any pain. She opened her eyes. Her whole body was encased in a purple aura, just above the ground.

“No! No no no no no! I wanted this!” She floated to the top of the cliff, struggling in vain to break the aura about her. She reached the top, looking at an irate Twilight.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

“Please kill me!” She sobbed.

“Twi, take her back to the library and put in her magical cell or something, we obviously need to help her,” a tired AJ said.

“No! Not another prison!” Shadow protested.

“Another?” Twilight asked. Shadow hung her head. She had been caught in a lie.