Cheeky Business

by Brother Roga

Cheeky Business

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It was early in the afternoon in Ponyville, a normal day by most standards. Even by Ponyville standards it was awfully normal. Spike was given the day off from his assistant duties as Twilight was going through the process of rearranging the books in alphabetical order, Rainbow Dash was at Cloudsdale to see the Wonderbolts who were starring in a show on the stadium and Rarity had just finished a new dress that she was taking to Fluttershy's place. She had stepped inside through the open door to find nopony greeting her.

'Fluttershy? Darling, are you in here?' Rarity half-yelled, her voice carrying all over the house. As no reply came, the white unicorn strolled around, carrying a dress alongside her, ready to be put on at a moment's notice. As the mare came to the conclusion that her feathered friend was not inside her own house, she must be somewhere on her backyard, as Fluttershy said that she would be busy for the day.
Rarity didn't know why, but she felt jealous in a way. She could almost imagine her own dresses coming to life and loving her back just as much as she had poured her own love into making them. But wishing for the impossible was not her way.

As she stepped outside, Rarity took a small glance at the yard itself. It was nice and spacey, with a simple picnic table and some chairs. As one would imagine, there were animals scuttering about, either minding their own business or getting out of her way. As luck would have it, the unicorn spotted a little piece of pink mane behind a tree.

'Ah, there you are darling! I've been looking all over for you!' The fashionista said, taking steps towards her now-located friend, stepping on a flower as she did so. Unbeknownst to her, a honey bee was very angry at her for she had stepped on the flower it was just about to land on, causing it to go on an uncontrolled course towards the ground, which it hit with an inaudible thud.
The cream-colored mare stepped into the open, surprised to see Rarity in her backyard. The unicorn was usually loathe to be near the wild critters that inhabited the area around Fluttershy's cottage.

'Oh! Hello, Rarity.' She looked at the dress her friend was carrying with her. 'Oh wow, that dress looks wonderful!' She said, her naturally low voice making her sound slightly disinterested, though Rarity knew that she was anything but disinterested.

'Indeed it is darling! Only thing it needs right now is somepony to try it on! I'd do it myself, but it simply doesn't fit me. I don't want to be a bother, but could you please try it on? For me?'

'Of course I'll try it! Oh, I bet I'll look so great on it! Let's go try it right away!' Fluttershy said, rubbing her hooves together as she hovered in the air about half a hoof high.

'Thank you so much! You're really a lifesa-'

*sting*

'OOOWWWWW!!!' The startled mare yelled, dropping the dress as she started galloping at high speeds, having not noticed the bee that had situated itself on her cheek and stung her for when she had stepped on the flower earlier.

'OW OW OW OW OW IT HURTS!' She yelled as she bolted from one end of the yard to the next, zooming like Rainbow Dash after a cup of black coffee.
The timid pegasus was startled at the display but knew that the stinger should be removed. That is, assuming that it was one of her honey-bees.

'Oh my... Umm, Rarity, could you stay still? I mean, you don't have to if you don't want to...' The mare said, her voice unheard as the unicorn kept on running in pain and shock.

'OH MY CELESTIA, THE PAIN! THE HORRIFYING PAIN!' Rarity screamed before she slowed down to a stop, huffing like she had ran a marathon.
Then again, she kinda did.

'Hah... Hah... Oh my stars...' She panted as she was completely out of breath. The unicorn tried to rub the spot she was stung on but quickly recoiled as the pain came back with a vengeance. She looked over to Fluttershy, the little mark on her cheek clearly sporting a ripped off stinger of a honey-bee. It was swelling quickly.

'Oh my! Hold still, Rarity!' Fluttershy said with concern in her voice as she quickly closed the distance between them and carefully took the stinger off, causing the white unicorn to wince in pain as it was extracted.

'I think I got it... Let me get you a mirror.' The pegasus said before quickly going inside the cottage, coming out moments later with a hoof-held mirror.
The moment she laid her eyes on it, she noticed the small reddish bump on her cheek. It was still growing. It made her look like her cheek was an apple ripe for the picking.
Her eye twitched as she held her gaze. Then she fainted.

Rarity heard distant voices and her mind was swimming in some place that seemed to sway like a ship at sea. She wanted to throw up but she controlled herself, nopony would see her commit such an unladylike act!

'Rarity? Rarity? Are you alright, Rarity?' Fluttershy said.
It all came back to her in an instant.
And as soon as it did, she gasped.

'OH NO! I NEED TO FIX THIS QUICKLY! I CAN'T BE SEEN LIKE THIS!'
With that she was out of the couch Fluttershy had taken her to and began rummaging through her belongings, quickly taking the face powder that she had in a cabinet. She hardly used it so it was fair to say that in her haste, she managed to get pretty much all of it on her face. She looked like Slenderpony with a purple mane. A squee could be heard somewhere before she shook her head and looked at the mirror, satisfied that the awful-looking area that was stung was now covered from view. In it's place was a... stinging feeling.

'Oh, I simply cannot concentrate on my work while my cheek burns so much!'
The pegasus had kept quiet about her friend wasting all of her face powder. But she was worried for Rarity. The unicorn was going to start another of her drama queen moments (again) if she didn't do something quickly.

'Umm.. I.. I think I can come up with something. For the cheek I mean.'
She visibly shrunk in size as the fashionista's gaze fell upon her.

'... If y-you want to.'
Rarity was thrilled about, hugging Fluttershy tightly.

'OH THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUFLUTTERSHYDARLING!' She said, almost stumbling upon her words as she spit them out.

'...But it's going to take a while to make.'
Rarity's face fell instantly.

'How long are we talking about?'

'Umm... 4-'

'Minutes!?'

'Hours.'
The unicorn's lower lip started shaking of its own accord before she shook her head.

'...I suppose that will have to do. But please do hurry, I can't stand this sore cheek! It's ruining my complexion!'

'Of course! I can't stand to watch you in pain like that. Not to mention that bee...' Fluttershy said before explaining how the honey-bee's digestive system is attached to the stinger which means that without it the flying bug will die from severe trauma within a couple of hours. As she finished, the pegasus looked at the unicorn who was disgusted by the thorough explanation.

'I... I..' The fashionista stuttered, unable to form a coherent sentence after learning that tidbit of information she could have lived without.

'I'm sorry darling but I must be off now. A really big order to finish. Yes, a big order!' She said, giving a nervous smile as a squee came from somewhere before she was out the door. Before Fluttershy could do anything, her friend zoomed back.

'Oh, and please try to hurry with that cure!' With that, Rarity was once again out of earshot.

As the buildings closed in, Rarity felt a pang of fear gripping her. What if they saw her cheek despite all that she had done to mask it? What if she stumbled into one of the fillies like Scootaloo? What if-
She didn't have time to finish her sentence before a certain wall-eyed mare noticed her and came to greet her.

'Hi, Raritie!' Derpy said, pronouncing the unicorn's name wrong.

'It's Rarity, not Raritie. Still, hello to you too, Derpy! Now, if you'll excuse me, I got places to be and-'

'Hold on a second, you got something on your face.' The pegasus said, almost touching her cheek as Rarity was horrified. Was she referring to her cheek? And if Derpy's eyesight - which was understandably a lot less effective than "regular" ponies - could see through all the effort Rarity had gone through to conceal her cheek, then anypony could!
Derpy proved the unicorn's fears wrong. She reached behind her ear and unexplainably withdrew it only to have a muffin on it. A blueberry muffin.

'Ta-da! Here you go!'
There was a moment of silence as Rarity sighed mentally as Derpy just stood there waiting for the unicorn to take the muffin.

'I'm sorry Derpy, but I can't accept your kind gift. I'm sure you'd love to have that muffin all to yourself, though.'

'Wow! Really!? Thanks Raritie!' With that the pegasus rose to the air and started to float away, crumbs of muffin falling down wherever she went.

'That's Rarity, not Raritie. Urgh, that mare can be so frustrating sometimes.' She groaned. Thankfully her home was just ahead.
Once she was inside the walls of her pride and joy, the Carousel Boutique, Rarity gave a relieved sigh.

'Well, that certainly could have gone better. Still, work with what you have.'
Opal came down the stairs as it heard the door opening and the bell ringing. As soon as it noticed the red mark on it's owner's cheek, it growled a bit before it went back up the stairs.

'Oh come now, Opal. It's not THAT bad! I did cover it up!'
As if eager to get more attention, the cheek sent a burning sensation to Rarity's brain, making her instinctively try to rub it with her hoof before she stopped herself, knowing it would only increase the pain.
The frustration was clear on her features as the fashionista decided to try and breathe slowly like Cadance had shown Twilight during their visit to the Crystal Empire. This went on for a long time, an hour passing by even if Rarity thought that it was only a few minutes.
As she slowly went through the process, the door swung open as a certain purple dragon entered, holding a bouquet of flowers in his claws.

'Hello, my dear Rari-WHOAWHOAWHOA!' Spike didn't finish his sentence as he saw his crush's cheek red as an apple during Applebuck season. Most of the face powder had already disappeared in the slightly windy weather outside, leaving barely anything to cover the stinged area.

'Rarity, what happened to your cheek!? Does it hurt?'
The unicorn was blushing, not in the slightest because of the gentledrake's original intentions.

'Sorry Spike, it's nothing really. I just got stung by a bee, is all.'
The dragon moved closer as his gaze inspected the cheek. One exploratory touch, however, made Spike quiver in fear.

'OUCH!'

'SORRY! I'll just leave you in peace, okay? I'll leave the flowers on the desk. Sorry about that!' Spike quickly said before he bolted out the door, not willing to stay and face the fashionista's anger.

Hours passed as Rarity paced around and about her room before the door opened again, revealing Fluttershy's figure.

'Oh my stars darling! You couldn't have come at a better time! This sting is killing me!'

'Umm.. I'll put it on then. Lay down please. And don't try to move.'
A bottle's wooden cork came off with a pop as Fluttershy hoofed the opened container to the fashionista.

'Okay, now you want to carefully smear your cheek with it and stay still for a few minutes for it to take effect. It'll sting a bit, but it won't last longer than a minute.'

'You certain that this will work, darling?' Rarity said, eyeing the bottle warily.

'Oh yes. I use this a lot when I have to deal with stung bears and the like. Not a single complaint!' The pegasus said, trying to imitate Rainbow Dash's chest-puffing, but failing miserably.

'I'll take your word for it dear.' The unicorn said before an eager splotch of the almost gooey stuff went to her hoof and from there onto her cheek.

'Eww, this is so gross! I'm going to have to visit the spa at least four times before this comes off!' Rarity said, disgusted by the texture and the smell.
Soon enough the room smelt like a bog as the strong smell spread all over the house.
The pain had receded but the mental damage had already been caused as Rarity was forced to let the ointment do it's work. She was not prepared for the door to open, however.
A purple unicorn with a neatly combed mane entered with Spike in tow. They were at first disgusted by the smell before they looked over at Rarity, who had a green blob on her cheek. The said green blob looked like it contained bits and pieces of fruit in it.
Before Twilight could say anything, the white unicorn held a hoof in the pair's direction.

'Don't ask.'


Author's Note

I used the term "hoofed" instead of "handed" because ponies.