Movie Night

by MechaLump

Rating: teen
Tags: DJ P0N-3, Lyra, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Random
Length: 2378

Vinyl and Lyra both love pizza but if there wasn't enough to go around they could be reasonable about it, couldn't they?

It's movie night, Vinyl and Lyra's 13th Movie night to be precise and as the two begin to wind down there's only one thing that could possibly set the two off, but what are the chances of that happening?

Submitted for Chaotic Note's Pre-Summer writing Contest

Published 2013-06-05 03:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-06-05 03:50:01 UTC

Movie Night

It was a dark Saturday morning; Lyra and Vinyl’s 13th weekly action movie marathon had yet again spilled over into the following morning. Empty cans of energy drinks and Poneken laid around what was officially Bon Bon’s basement/home theater (I don’t know how she paid for it either just keep reading). Each of their coat’s was stained with drinks and a few pieces of candy that they were too lazy to pick up, Lyra’s turquoise body only barely helped to hide said stains whereas Vinyl’s white coat did nothing whatsoever to camouflage them.

The two were feeling the siren call of sleep after just finishing Crouching Griffin, Hidden Dragon and were just about to call it a night when they simultaneously reached out of their personal over-sized, fake-leather armchair for a slice of pizza, though they were slightly confused when their hooves touched. Turning quizzically they finally realized that the pizza they had reached for was the very last slice of Pinkie Pie’s semi-famous secret-recipe pizza, said to be so delicious it could calm the wrath of a Goddess...it could, by the way

With a chuckle Vinyl uttered “You know, it’s been a good night, good friends, a good movie, let’s not spoil it with you taking my slice of pizza”

“No, no, no Vinyl” Lyra retorted “You've got it all wrong, this slice is mine” she smiled through near-gritted teeth.

“Actually, you've had one more slice than me” Vinyl reasoned “which means, this one’s mine” neither of them had moved their hooves off the slice since they began reasoning.

“Vinyl, you ate two 12 inch hay bacon and dandelion pizza’s on your own, I think I’m entitled to this one slice” Lyra was starting to get impatient and hungrier by the second. Only the remnants of a smile left on her face

“So what, you had almost all the candy! Which translates to more than a few pizzas” Vinyl was also showing signs of impatience.

“In what country is that?”

“Equestria!”
Both of them had gotten up and had one hoof delicately on the pizza and another almost digging into the table it was placed upon. As tensions rose, both the unicorn’s horns began to glow ever so slightly with that mare’s respective magical colour. Vinyl had ditched her DJ ‘shades’ hours ago so the two were glaring into each other’s eyes, waiting for a weakness to present itself.

After 30 seconds of pure silence, other than the heavy breathing of the two, no such weakness was seen…so at precisely the same time, both of them fired a magical blast from their horns which collided between them, causing a small shock-wave to knock the two back into opposite walls of the fairly large basement (about 25ft across) with an audible ‘whack’
Both of the mares rose to their hooves with a look resembling anger and disbelief, regaining that speechless stare.

“Oh, it’s go-time” The DJ remarked, using her magic to pick up her saddlebags and place them on her back. As the clasp locked the straps around her tightly, the bags began to open and transform into what could only be described as 15 inch sub-woofers from the distant future. They were as white as she was (when she wasn't covered in beer and bonbons) with sleek electric blue glass broke the pure whiteness with straight-line patterns which glowed slightly but allowed a small peek into the inner workings of the mechanical masterpieces. They were perfectly symmetrical, except for their names that were scratched into the sides: BASS on her left and TrebleMOAR BASS on her right.

Lyra's awe only lasted a few seconds as she shook it off to prepare her own arsenal. She clenched her eyes and her teeth putting immense magical force into her horn which glowed as brilliantly as gold fire. Her horn then proceeded to spew forth pure golden magic which glowed only slightly less than her horn did. The magic was like a liquid but it floated almost freely into the air, the golden fluid began to take the form of two giant limbs, which then began to slowly form appendages.

"Those paw-things won't do you any good here, Lyra" Vinyl commented with an amused tone.

"They're called hands Vinyl, and you think a little dub-step's gonna help you here?" she emphasized her point by pointing her new glowing, golden index finger at her DJ opponent

"Through a magically enhanced 94 kilo-watt sub-woofer, powerful enough to focus air particles into a solid force and providing it with enough energy to form an ionized plasma which breaks apart atoms upon contact" Vinyl paused to inhale deeply "and I have two of them"

Lyra stood staring blankly at Vinyl, amazed at how she knew such technical and advanced language, not to mention that many long words. "Since when have you known science-y stuff?"

"I've always been this smart" Vinyl said with a proud smile which earned a deadpan look from the turquoise mare. "Okay, I said 'Bass Cannon' to some engineer pony and he explained it that way. I just memorized what he said" Vinyl admitted with a look of distaste.

"Oh, I get it" Lyra commented "Anyway, how 'bout we-" the Lyrist interrupted herself by lunging forward and throwing a punch with her right golden fist.

Vinyl saw the attack and, thanks to how spacious the room was, was able to jump to her side, away from Lyra's great punch which proceeded to clash with the wood paneled concrete wall, cracking it and sending a shake through the entire house. As Lyra tried to dislodge her fist from the wall, to no avail, she heard the distinct sound of a powerful electric device activating to her left. She jerked her head towards the sound and came face-to-face with exactly what she had feared...that is to say, a rather large sub-woofer beginning to vibrate quite violently a little too close for comfort.

With the extra incentive of impending doom Lyra was just able to rip her hand free of the wooden board and put both palms up to block the incoming attack, and trust me, what was essentially the full power of the lost Element of Raving put into two laser-beams angled so they would both hit the target, hit pretty damn hard. So hard, in fact, that when it hit the golden limbs of Lyra (that's really fun to say) they pushed her back about 3 feet and sent anything light, like magazines, the TV remote, and one of the surround-sound speakers soaring into the air and crashing into a wall or the ceiling. Lyra knew her only chance was to get out of the way but the beams kept her locked in place for fear of getting thrown into Bon Bon's 134 inch, wall mounted, plasma wide-screen, Lyra-if-you-so-much-as-scratch-this-you're-a-dead-pony TV (I'm just as confused as to where one pony gets this much money as you are, at least it's not 3D).

With an extreme push of effort Lyra slid her left golden hand out of the way of the attack and launched it at Vinyl's right cannon. The blow was enough to blast Vinyl's cannon to smithereens, leaving nothing but bolts and gears, and a very lop-sided DJ, but cost Lyra her place on the ground as the second beam had enough force to throw her backwards...with pinpoint accuracy...directly into the center...of Bon Bon's 134 inch, wall mounted, plasma wide-screen, Lyra-if-you-so-much-as-scratch-this-you're-a-dead-pony TV. Utterly obliterating the screen and knocking it off the wall, bringing it crashing down to the ground with her.

Slowly Lyra got up, with pieces of glass still digging into her back, she looked at the TV with the same look of terror as Vinyl had plastered on her face, while looking at her bass cannon. Simultaneously they both shouted:

"Do you have any idea how much these cost? Bon Bon's gonna KILL me!"

"Do you have any idea how much these cost? Tavi's gonna KILL me!"

Forgetting their impending fate they returned to their epic battle, Vinyl began powering up her one remaining cannon while Lyra tried but failed to re-summon her magical left arm, settling for magical hands on either of her fore-hooves. "I thought you'd have realized by now that those mitts you call hands don't work" Vinyl commented as her cannon had nearly finished charging.

"Fine then" Her turquoise adversary replied morphing the hands into jagged claws and leaning back to stand on her back hooves, leaving her claws ready to strike.

The blast of Vinyl's remaining cannon came with next-to-no warning and almost caught Lyra off-guard but as the beam was a fraction of a second away she teleported behind the DJ who, with her advanced DJ hearing, heard the slight 'poof' of the magic and stopped the cannon from digging further into the hole where Bon Bon's TV used to be just in time to dodge an incoming swipe from Lyra's claws and to block a second attack. "Keep in close-quarters so I can't use my cannons, nice strategy, I'm impressed" Vinyl said while the two were locked in place.

"If that impresses you..." Lyra replied with a smirk "This'll blow your mind!" She shouted as she tore her hooves out of the DJ's grasp and began swiping her claws at a speed Rainbow Dash would be threatened by. Though, strangely, not a single serpentine strike of her claws actually hit their target, either being deflected or simply dodged by the DJ. Save for one, the last strike caught Vinyl's cheek as she blocked it, causing a single drop of blood to roll down her cheek. Exhausted the two stayed there, locked in position, until their silence was broken by Vinyl.

"Please don't tell Tavi I'm a ninja"

"Only if you give me the pizza" Lyra negotiated with a devilish smirk

"Not for all the stars in Luna's sky" Vinyl retorted with a glare "I'd sooner see the reaper than give you that pizza" as she finished her sentence Vinyl broke the hold, throwing Lyra about 2 feet backwards and created two blood red daggers of pure magic that stuck out of the side of each of her fore-hooves. Not pausing for a moment, she launched her right fore-hoof at Lyra's head, deliberately missing so the magical blade would target her which was swiftly blocked by Lyra's claws. Sending the two into another round of lighting-fast strikes but this time with more 'clang's of magical steel colliding with magical steel, also leaving many more cuts and scratches on the two from their magical weapons.

Eventually the two broke apart weakened from their long night and this great battle, breathing heavily, weapons held at the ready, Vinyl spoke "This was fun, but all good things must come to an end" as she charged her cannon for the last time. Lyra tried to move but her exhaustion caused her hind-legs to stay exactly where they were. The rising pitch of the cannon only caused her to panic more and more until she found peace with herself, and was calm, then spoke:

"LIKE TARTARUS I'M GOING DOWN NOW!" as the cannon was about to fire, she swung both her fore-hooves forwards and let her claws fly out. A total of 3 claws struck the DJ's remaining cannon, causing it to shake and spark violently. Realizing what had happened, Vinyl tried to jump away from the cannon but as she released the clasps which strapped it to her body the cannon exploded in almost an animated fashion.

The basement was quite literally like a war zone, most of the thick carpet was burned away, the TV was in pieces, any and all furniture looked about as bad as the TV. But as the sun rose, so did the two mares that fought that night. They stood, shakily smiling just because they were alive, though they sustained many wounds.

But before either of them could say anything a large black tear in the fabric of space opened in the concrete wall between them and a pony wearing a large robe, black as Sombra's heart, it's face covered and wielding a large scythe walked through and looked to them both. Then spoke "Your time among the living is over mortals, be at peace and transcend to the afterlife where you shall live eternally with those you have lost" in a great, booming, ethereal voice.

"Wait, I don't understand" Vinyl said breaking the momentary silence. The being pushed back it's hood to reveal a large, bright pink, cotton candy mane and a similarly pink pony, smiling at them.

"Sorry to say it, but you died ya silly willies!"

"PINKIE PIE?" they both shouted in disbelief.

"Yeah, the baking business isn't what it used to be" she said with a sigh "We needed the bits so I took up the job" her explanation only confused the mares more. "Ooh, pizza" Pinkie said, wide-eyed and licking her lips. She sauntered over to the table that was miraculously still standing and in a single 'gulp' swallowed the pizza slice whole. There was a moment of silence when Pinkie's eyes glazed over and the other two mares could only stare in horror and confusion, eventually Pinkie shook off her trance and turned to face the two with her hood up, returning to her ethereal voice she said "After much deliberation the Gods have granted you a second chance at life, use it well" and disappeared in a puff of black smoke.

Lyra and Vinyl could only sit, dumbfounded by what just happened, though their silence was broken by two angry female voices.

"LYRA!"

"VINYL!"

The two mares turned to see a furious Bon Bon and Octavia at the door, glaring daggers (seriously if looks could kill these two could bring about the apocalypse) and suddenly remembered the thousands of bits of damage they had done to Bon Bon's basement and the wounds they both still had covering their bodies.

Vinyl turned to Lyra with terror in her eyes and shouted: GET PINKIE BACK! GET PINKIE BACK! GET PINKIE BACK! GET PINKIE BACK!

Author's Note

If you made it this far I salute you reader

Any and all tips are much appreciated, this is my first fic, go easy on me