Derpy brushed the stick of charcoal across the page, tracing the imagined outline of a glittering lake. She was curled up on the floor of her living room, relishing this brief chance to indulge in her hobbies. A few feet away, Dinky sat in front of the crackling fire, one of her cherished books held in her front hooves. Her lips moved around the words she read, trying each one for size.
The fire cast flickering shadows on the walls of the room, turning the garish orange wallpaper into a window through which figures danced and swayed to the beat of an inaudible song. The shade of the coal scuttle became a boat rocking on choppy seas beneath the crimson lightning storm shining through Derpy's wine glass. A second log caught alight and the scene split in two, painting it on opposite sides of the wall, overlapping in parts.
Derpy swept the charcoal about and the rapidly-vanishing blank space on the paper revealed a sky flecked with bright stars and a tremendous full moon.
Dinky started nodding her head to each syllable she mouthed. Derpy recognised it as a sign that she was having difficulty with a word.
"Spell it out for me, Dinky," she said.
Dinky pulled the book closer to her face and placed a hoof on the page, running it from left to right along the offending word. "B-E-H-A-V-I-O-U-R."
"Behaviour. You know that one, Dinky. 'Be on your best behaviour.'"
"I'm always on my best behaviour," said Dinky.
Derpy smiled and reached out for her wine. Suddenly, her vision doubled and her fumbling hoof knocked against the glass, sending its contents spilling across the cream-coloured carpet. She cursed loudly before she could stop herself. She put both her hooves to her mouth and looked at Dinky, who stared back, wide-eyed, book forgotten.
"I'm sorry, Dinky. I said a bad word. Don't you say things like that, even if I do sometimes."
Dinky still looked scared. "Mommy, your eyes have gone all funny."
Derpy moved a hoof to her right eye, covering it and reducing the number of Dinkies she was seeing to just the one. Her remaining eye focused on the young unicorn, whose face was filled with concern.
"I'm fine, Dinky. Come sit over here for a minute."
She patted the floor in front of her. Dinky obediently closed her book, put it neatly on the bookshelf and knelt down in front of Derpy. She was such a good filly. Derpy hated to see her upset. It was better to explain this to her now than have her worry. She uncovered her eye again, which treacherously scrutinised the curtains while the other watched Dinky.
"It's called 'strabismus' or a 'lazy eye'. It just doesn't look in the right direction sometimes, so I find it hard to know how far away things are. I have problems reading, too. I've been getting it on and off recently but the doctors are treating it and hopefully I'll be all better soon, so don't worry."
"Does it hurt?"
"No," she lied.
Derpy had some free time between the end of her morning shift and the time she had to pick Dinky up from school. She had decided to supplement her income with some part-time work at Boxy Brown's moving company. A mailmare's salary didn't go far for a single mother anymore.
Her friend Raindrops was rattling off a stream of off-colour jokes as they loaded the cart, hovering high in the air. Derpy closed her eyes and laughed wildly. When she opened them again, her vision swam. She had a brief moment of disorientation and dropped her box heavily onto the back of the cart, tilting the whole vehicle backwards. The hauliers strapped to the front cried out as they struggled to bring it level again, but it was too late. Some of the cargo started to slide along the wooden planks towards the back.
Raindrops threw herself at the boxes and beat her wings as hard as she could, but more and more weight slid down against her.
"Derpy!" she cried. "The ramp! Close the ramp!"
Derpy grabbed the ramp and slammed it shut over the back of the cart. She reached for the latch but, without depth perception, she fell short by less than an inch. She didn't get another chance to try it before Raindrops' hindquarters struck the ramp, knocking it open again and wrenching it out of Derpy's grip. The two watched in horror as the cargo spilled out into empty air and tumbled, end over end, to the waiting ground below.
Boxy fixed them with an icy glare and all Derpy could do was grin apologetically.
The insurance had covered the damage and Boxy decided to let the incident go, but Derpy couldn't go back to work for him for fear that it would happen again. She had gone home that evening and cried in frustration, cursing her affliction, her stupidity, her uselessness.
Yes, it hurt sometimes.
"No, it doesn't hurt. It's just a bit of a nuisance."
"How did it happen?" asked Dinky.
"Well, in this case it's hereditary. That means that lots of people in our family get it. My aunt Daisy in Canterlot has it and my grandfather had it. It's possible that you'll get it too, so that's why it's so important that we catch it early. You know when you go for your check-up and Nurse Redheart shines the light in your eyes?"
Dinky nodded.
"That's her checking for a lazy eye."
"I don't like going to the doctor," Dinky said absently.
Derpy stamped her hoof sharply on the floor. "Well, you have to!"
She regretted it immediately as Dinky flinched at the sudden outburst. She shrank back and tried to relax.
"I'm sorry, Dinky. I just don't want you having the same problems I do."
The sun shone from its afternoon peak over Ponyville as Derpy swooped down towards the main street and the brightly-coloured post office. Her morning run had been particularly strenuous today, with nearly double the number of magazines for houses than usual. Their covers had been adorned by a beautiful yellow pegasus with a pink mane who Derpy was sure she recognised but couldn't put her hoof on a name.
Her muscles were tense and sore and she yawned widely. As she did, her right eye refocused on a distant mountain peak while her left remained straight. Derpy reared back from her descent onto the post office roof, unsure how close it could be. Panicking, she banked right into her blind spot and one of her wings clipped the town hall's flagpole, driving it painfully into her flank. Her other barely held her aloft for a moment before she dipped gracelessly onto the busy street below.
She hit the ground hard and tumbled head over heels before slamming face-first into the dirt. Groaning, she raised her head. Through duplicitous sight, she became aware of the crowd that had gathered. A few concerned ponies squatted in front of her, telling her not to move and checking her for injury. A number of onlookers held back, whispering to each other. As they caught sight of her eyes, the whispers intensified and a few pointed hooves at her. Far at the back, some pony she couldn't see laughed out loud...
Derpy was aware of the reputation for clumsiness that stunt had earned her. It was true that she was a bit awkward, but rumour had exaggerated it beyond recognition. Since then, any offers she gave to friends to help with tasks were politely refused as if she was going to break things as soon as she got near them. That wasn't the life she wanted for her daughter.
Derpy held still as Dinky walked around her, looking into her mother's mismatched eyes and tilting her head quizzically when the right eye refused to follow her motions. Eventually, Dinky sat back down.
"Mommy, if I had strubsmuz..."
"Strabismus."
"If I had strabismus, would you still love me?"
Derpy was taken aback. "Of course I'd still love you, Dinky. Nothing could make me stop loving you."
The tiny filly got to all fours again and trotted over to Derpy. She wrapped her front hooves around her mother's neck and hugged her tightly.
"Me too."
Derpy smiled and hugged her back. They held the embrace for a long time before Derpy gently detached the filly's grip on her.
"Go get your book."
Dinky retrieved the book from the shelf and returned to Derpy, who was now lying on her side with a wing extended. Dinky nestled herself under the soft feathers and placed the book in front of her.
"OK," said Derpy. "Let's read this together. I'll help you with any big words and you help me if I lose my place. Deal?"
"Deal."
In the fireplace, a log rolled over and dropped into the heart of the flames. The twin silhouettes became one again, clear and crisp.
