Blueblood's thoughts

And then there's our friend Rarity. There's a reason that she likes to make huge and extravagant dresses: it's to hide the fact that she has two mouths. One she uses when talking to Applejack and the other she uses when talking about Applejack.

Did I say two mouths? Perhaps I meant two faces.

I've been slandered by Rarity as being dishonourable and devious, and yet, I've never been anything but honest about my nature. I wear my heart on my sleeve, as it were. Rarity, on the other hoof, is just like I am, but hides it under fine silks and a pretty smile.

How many times has she hid behind her friends while chastising you on your lack of courage? How many times has she fled, leaving Twilight to protect her as she ran away?

She herself said it best: "I only need one strike." And she only strikes when she's made sure that you have no chance to defend yourself. Not because she's a better pony, but because she talks better than you do.

Rarity is a snotty, limp-hoofed, inbred whelp who needs... no, not needs... who wants a spanking.

The funniest thing about her is how she thinks she serves Celestia. After all, how does dressmaking serve Celestia? Does it serve her... oh, say, greater than the way the Apple Family serves Celestia? Which is more important to Celestia - a couple of cheap dresses, or feeding hundreds of ponies? Digging up a couple of gems or preventing starvation?

A pony's duty is to help other ponies. Just how does dress making and gem finding help other ponies? I'm sure Rarity has a very eloquent answer for us. Tell you what, she can tell her very eloquent answer to the ponies who just starved to death. I'm certain they want to hear all about it.

Oh, yes, Rarity certainly makes Equestria look very pretty, but a pretty coffin is still a coffin, no matter how many sequins and gems you put on it.