A Story To Tell

Of Meteors and Men

"No one was hurt?"

"Not unless you count the plants, in which case, heavy civilian casualties."

One glare from Twilight later, Broadhoof stuttered and said, "Uhhh... I mean, no, no, not even a single injury."

"Thank you."

Right. No one's been hurt. Next...

"Have you determined what it is yet?"

"Uhhh, no, nope, negative. 'Course, I'm assuming it's some sort 'o... Space rock."

Twilight quickly examined the damage and immediately wrote that off.

"No, not possible."

"Huh? How can you tell?"

"It's not possible for a meteor to be this small, the friction from the entry of our atmosphere would have completely incinerated it. It would have had to have been bigger, big enough that we would not be here. And that doesn't include the known elements, how heavy they are, the damage they would've done..."

"Ooookay then. What is it?"

"That's what I intend to find out."

Broadhoof nodded and said, "Well let me escort you then."

"Of course."

Only a few steps later, Captain Broadhoof halted and said, "Hold on a second, Private Black and I tried to approach it earlier, but it was too hot. Like, seriously, we couldn't even get near it. Think it'll be cooled by now?"

"It should be. And if it's not, we do have the means to cool it down."

"Uh, right, of course. Now let's check this out."

On instinct, Captain Broadhoof lowered his spear, a precaution which Twilight quietly scoffed at, as they came closer. It was indeed quite hot, but it wasn't scorching by any means.

Soon enough, the stone came into view. Again, the heat had grown quite a bit, but it was standable.

Twilight turned her head away and coughed. The smoke was smothering!

Twilight heard Broadhoof mumble something under his breath. Curious, she turned over to him and asked, "What was that?"

Not taking his eyes off the stone, he pointed with his hoof and said, "Look."

Twilight frowned and looked for herself. Her jaw dropped and her eyes widened in surprise. It... Was a statue. At least, that's what it seemed like...

Twilight leaned in a bit to examine it, but stopped when she heard a familiar voice call out.

"Twilight! Where are you?"

It was Celestia.

Twilight, despite her insurmountable curiosity toward the unknown object at this point, smiled and turned around just in time to see Celestia hurry over and stop in front of her, her eyes filled with worry.

"Twilight, are you alright? Is everyone alright?"

Twilight silently giggled at the Princesses' concern and answered, "It's alright, Princess; everypony's okay."

Twilight waved a greeting over at Luna who was currently standing behind her elder sister. The path through the hedges was only so wide...

"So... What is it then?" Celestia inquired.

Twilight smiled and her eyes lit up with glee.

"I don't know! It looks like a statue, but one carved in the likeness of a creature I've never even heard of before, and it came from orbit! I have no idea what it is!"

Celestia frowned a bit. Twilight usually hated not knowing things.

"Here, come look for yourself."

All three Princess made room for one another and Twilight shooed away Broadhoof, who had been prodding the statue with his spear. The large stallion snapped to attention and stayed that way.

Celestia widened her eyes and mumbled something along the lines of, "Oh my." Luna only frowned and came in for a better look.

"It... Looks like an ape. Sort of, I mean." She observed.

"Yes. But look at it's face and head. It either was really deformed, or, more likely, it's been covered by protective gear for some reason. Look, a cloth there, some sort of goggle-glasses thing there, what appears to be a helmet..."

Princess Celestia and Luna exchanged amused glances at Twilight's antics.

"Well, yes, but none of that explains what exactly it is. Or... Why it fell from the sky." Luna said, more to herself then to anyone else.

Nonetheless, Twilight heard her and said "Oh I don't know." Twilight half-heartedly said, already peering in closer.

The statue, at this point, was finally almost completely cooled off. It still smoked a bit, and parts of it were still criss-crossed with red fissures, but it was one-hundred-percent approachable.

Suddenly, a deep crack sounded, startling everyone within earshot.

"Did... Did that come from... That?" Luna asked wearily.

"I... I think it did."

Celestia became wary and said, "Luna, Twilight, step back."

"But-"

"Now." She commanded.

Twilight gulped and darted over to join the other two Alicorns.

The crack sounded again, this time clearly coming from the statue.

A massive hiss of steam shot from the cracks, and then the statue exploded.

I re-entered the waking world slowly, casually. I found breathing difficult, and the ability which I had previously possessed to open my eyes seemed to have left me. Come to think of it, moving at all was quickly becoming something that I had obviously taken for granted during my entire thirty-two years of life.

My breathing was slow, labored, and brought shards of pain with every intake. It was hot. Really hot. Very humid and stuffy.

My brain, seeming determined to notice these things one at a time, suddenly realized that it ached. Quite a bit. Oh, and of course, my leg decided that it hurt now too. And the bleeding came back. A lot.

All of this, of course, raises the question: What the freaking hell am I doing here?

Let's see... Death, mortar round, digging, almost death, more digging, rescue, grenade, death, sad, panic, crawl away, shoot-shoot, 'nother grenade, f*ck, light, smothering blackness.

Nope, no reason why I should be here. Wherever here was... And I am quite fond of my ability to move. Eventually I figured out that I could, in fact, move. Just very little. Well then time to make myself move more, eh?

I took a deep breath and strained against whatever it was holding me down. It didn't budge. That, you see, only pissed me off more. So I pressed harder, and, once more, not a single budge. So I pressed harder, and... Well, I think you've got the cycle.

Only, once I pressed hard enough, I heard a pretty loud crack, and a light, coming from somewhere, assaulted my eyes. I promptly screwed them shut and strained again.

I could feel my inanimate oppressor begin to give way, and, in one last surge of strength, as well as a blood-chilling cry of exertion I'm sure, I heard a tiny bit more crumbling and I was free.

"Raaaah!"

The light hurt like hell, and I was tired again. And I still hurt all over. Now that I was finally free, I flopped back and began breathing heavily-God it was hot-and had a lie down.

It was only after an entire minute or so that I became aware of very quiet, tense, and hushed voices. They were speaking a language that I couldn't understand. It wasn't German, so that much was alright, but it wasn't Russian either, so that much was not alright. Sounded a bit like English, but I don't speak that either, so it didn't really matter.

And then I opened my eyes.

Oh, ho, ho, ho have I got a situation here!