Internal Changeling Affairs

Chapter Eleven:  A Scandalous Escape

"hey, Doc help me out here will ya?"  Shining said.

"what do you want now?"  the doctor retorted.

"I dropped this picture of my wife I've been holding on to and I think it's under the bed.  could you please get it for me?  I'll make sure you park anywhere you want and never get a ticket"

"alright fine"  the doctor said as he knelt down to look for the picture.  "but after this I'm on bre-ack!"

It was a set up.  Shining Armor grabbed the doctor and tightly wrapped his fore-leg around his neck and began to choke him until he was unconscious.  As soon as the doctor was out, Shining took his keys, stethoscope, ID card, white jacket and toupee.  It was difficult for the newly awake guard captain to stand from the bed at first as he was stiff from being motionless for several days and had to take a few minutes to loosen up.  He fitted himself with his disguise, pushed the doctor under the bed and made his way to the elevator with the fluid iv still attached to his leg and the bag in his pocket.  When he got to the elevator, he began studying the map of the building that was on the wall.

"hmmm.  I can't just leave without my hardware belt"  Shining said to himself.  "oh good, the file room is on the 3rd floor"

Shining then pressed the button for his destination and within seconds was there.  The floor was not entirely used for files so he had to find his way to the room where they were kept which took but only a few minutes of searching.

"so far so good"  he said to himself as he approached the door.  upon observing the locked door he then discovered a slight problem.

"Damn!  it opens with a card"  Shining said.  "I don't think I can knock it down in the state I'm in"

Shining's luck had quickly turned back as a card fell out of the pocket of his "borrowed" jacket as he lightly punched the door out of frustration.

Unable to bend down to pick it up without taking on more pain he used his magic to levitate it to the slot and unlocked the door.  He found himself in a room full of filing cabinets that were in alphabetical order and searched for the one that would contain his own hospital records.

"now I know how Twiley's friend Rainbow Dash feels"  Shining said in a very excited tone.  "she was right.  it is fun to try out the wrong side of the law once in a while.  that kid's alright!"

Shining was soon flipping through files in the cabinet labeled "S" and pulling his own out of the folder in no time.

"Ok, so my stuff is in locker num- what the...low testosterone?!  who the ~squee~ do they think they're talking about here?!"

Upon reading the folder containing this insult to his stallion-hood, he threw it to the other side of the room and went back to the elevator and called it for basement floor one in search of storage locker number 1073.  So far he had been able to pull off his escape process without a problem but that soon abruptly halted as soon as the elevator door slid open revealing a confused looking hospital security guard on the other side.  Shining was sure he would have to perform another choke hold or risk being brought back to his room until the guard spoke.

"uhh...Doctor Studsward?"  the guard said.  "what are you doing down here?"

Seeing this as a perfect opportunity to drag the rude doctor's name through the mud, Shining went along with it.

"I'll go where I want when I want, punk"  Shining replied trying to sound as much like the doctor as he could.  "you could do that too if you went to college"

"ya know what, doc?"  the now irritated guard replied.  "you've been treating everypony around here like crap ever since you transferred here and I'm getting pretty damn tired of it!"

"Awww, let me call a whaaambulance for you"  Shining said as he walked towards the locker area.

"Up yours, pal!"  the guard yelled back at Shining while directing towards him an obscene gesture with his two forelegs.

With the oblivious guard now getting on the elevator to go up, Shining was now able to search for his belongings that he needed without further interruption.  He began passing by the numerically ordered lockers one by one.

"let's see, 1069, 1070, 1071, 1072...aha!  here's my stuf-awww ~squee~"  Shining Armor's luck had appeared to run out as he noticed that his locker along with all of the others were secured by combination locks and could not be opened with a key.

"dammit!" Shining yelled out of frustration.  "if I'm going to clear my sergeant's name and find out who really tried to off me, I can't very well do it without my gun!"

desperate to come up with a solution to his predicament, the tired and weakened guard captain began pacing back and fourth to think.

"now what!  how am I gonna get my stuff?  how am I gonna prove that Sergeant Goldstripe is innocent?  why did I take this stetha- Hello!"

Meanwhile, on the Streets of Canterlot

"ohhh Rarityyyyyy"  Pinkie Pie sang out over the pedal chopper's PA system.  "check this out"

Pinkie Pie then focused her Spotlight onto a horrified Prince Blueblood who was once again caught attempting to use his tongue to dislodge something from his nose.

"what do you think of your prince now?"  Pinkie blared out.

Rarity, standing only fifty yards or so away and seeing the whole thing reached for her two way mic.

"put me on speaker, darling"  Rarity said to Pinkie.  "I want the whole city hearing what I have to say"

"will you two stay focused?!"  Twilight yelled on the frequency causing Pinkie Pie to get distracted.  "we're looking for a rouge cop to bring him in on treason charges!  and for his sake, you better hope you find him before I do!"

"awww"  Pinkie groaned.  "you made me lose him.  I was going to take a picture and send it to Celestia"

Back at the Hospital

"heyyy Doctor"  said a mare's voice behind Shining as he was just about to walk out the front exit with his belongings.  Shining turned around to see the receptionist giving him a seductive stare.  "are we still on for tonight?"  the mare asked.

Seeing this as another chance to get back at the lousy doctor, Shining trotted to a nearby telephone on the wall, picked it up and pretended to dial a number.  "just a minute" he said to the mare.

"hey, Blueblood!"  Shining said loudly with nopony else on the other end.  "how's my sexy lover?...oh yeah last night was awesome!...haha yeah we were so gay with all our gayness and stuff!...uh huh...yeah I just wanted to let you know how gay I am for you...hey I gotta go now, some mare here is bugging me"  click!

The very second he hung up the phone and turned around to see the mare's reaction to his fake call, Shining was met with a barrage of office supplies flying at him.  Still in his wounded and recovering state he trotted out the door as fast as he could go until he was home free.

shining then stopped and turned to look back at the hospital and to his good fortune was able to dodge a stapler that otherwise would have knocked his horn off.

"How could you lead me on like this?!"  the teary-eyed mare shouted still shooting pencils at him with her unicorn magic.  "I loved you, you bastard!"

As the mare was still ranting and raving, Shining proceeded to hobble his way down the street away from the hospital while laughing hysterically until she was finally out of his sight.  He was quickly growing tired due to his nearly fatal wounds just a few days prior so he paused for a breather and began forming his plan.

"HA HA HAoh damn!"  Shining laughed as he wiped tears from his eyes.  "I needed a good laugh but that ~squee~ hurt!  alright, so I should really get on with saving the day.  phew!  gotta.  huff. catch my puff. breath."

End Chapter Eleven