Chapter 10

Twilight sat in his study uncomfortably bent over stacks upon stacks of paperwork.

“Ugh, why does there have to be so much paperwork?” Twilight asked nopony in particular. Of course the question was rhetorical; Twilight knew exactly why.

Every form that anypony filled out ever had two little check-boxes M or F; regardless if it was a for bank account that contained several million bits or a year-long membership to the spa given as a gift by a certain white unicorn who wasn't half as subtle as she thought she was. And now they all had to be changed.

“Prince Sparkle, there is somepony to see you.” Umbra

“This isn't the most opportune time; I'm busy.”

“She's most insistent.”

“Of course I'm insistent, you half brain-dead waste of a horn, I'm his cousin of house.”

Twilight glared at the grey pegasus that strode in like she owned the place “Hello Storm, I didn't expect to see you in Ponyville.”

“'Onward free Twilight' li'l Sparky.” the pegasus said with an unnerving smile.

Twilight sighed, the house words were never meant as a casual greeting. “Why are you here Storm?”

“Arcane Theory wanted to come to Ponyville, something about Lady Velvet messing with her mojo.”

“I wouldn't expect Theory to ever leave the artifacts behind.”

“Trust me she didn't.”

“You do realize that you outrank her; you're a lady of house Twilight and Theory is a knighted commoner.”

“I ... um ... uh ...”

“What she means to say is that I caught her doing something rather embarrassing and she would rather your mother not find out.” Theory said as she entered the room

“I don't even want to know, Theory. I don't even want to know.”

“Are you sure Sparkle? Your mother could write a trilogy with it.”

“Ugh, no.” Twilight shook his head in dismay “How did you even convince my mother to let you bring priceless artifacts to Ponyville anyways”

“I, didn't.”

Twilight groaned and rolled his eyes. “Ugh, fine. I'll put my neck out for you once. But next time you do something stupid, you're on your own”

“I knew you couldn't the lure of ancient magic relics of centuries gone by.”

Twilight sighed again. Damn Theory knew him too damn well

Rainbow Dash was bored. She sat in a large lecture hall that sat hundreds, if not thousands, listening to an old crotchety professor ramble on about something she already knew. In fact Rainbow had the misfortune to have her name on the paper that had preceded this lecture. Twilight had decided, several weeks ago, to see how the salt content in the air of coastal areas affects the inherent magic of storm development (a measurable increase of power by approximately 20 percent) and Rainbow had been her first choice for assistance. And now she had to endure some old mare talking about how this new discovery would affect her job (which it wouldn't, Ponyville was completely landlocked).

Rainbow Dash was also anxious. Not nervous – being nervous isn't cool – but anxious. The Ponyville weather team was one of the least experienced teams in one of the most dangerous positions. With the exception of Rainbow herself, not a single one of the team had gone through formal weather training. It wasn't that she didn't have faith in her team; it was that it seemed that every time she left Ponyville something was screwed up, be it as small as a missed light shower or as large as an F4 tornado (luckily nopony was seriously hurt in that particular event). After spending a week at the weather convention Rainbow was unsure whether Ponyville would be there when she returned.

And to top it all off Rainbow was very uncomfortable. Four days ago Rainbow had felt the first warning signs of heat, and since then it had only gotten worse. To make things even more uncomfortable, this was the first heat cycle Rainbow had experienced in five years; normally the pegasus would get Twilight to cast her heat suppression spell on her, but she hadn't been allowed to spare the half hour required to make a round trip to Ponyville. Aero Hurricane, the current head weather coordinator, had said that the convention was much too important to miss even one event; although Rainbow knew well enough that such a decision was motivated by spite rather than any kind of goodwill. Aero had only gotten her job because she was the daughter of a very powerful noble house, and been butting heads with Rainbow since her placement two years ago. Aero seems to think that she can use the weather teams as a tool to gain influence, while mistreating the workers; that is something that Rainbow would never stand for.

Luckily this was the last day that Aero could legally hold the pegasi of the weather teams in Cloudsdale before the start of the mandatory spring holiday (or the “get yourself rutted” holiday as many mares put it). Rainbow had never been one to take part in the hedonistic nymphomanial culture that most pegasus mares seemed to be a part of. In fact her relative asexuality had caused the pegasus stallions to believe she was a filly-fooler, an unfortunate fallacy that had followed the chromatic mare through her entire life.

To put it simply, Rainbow was not in a good mood.

“Miss Rainbow Dash” said a small exited voice.

“What?!” Rainbow practically growled.

“Oh, I'm sorry, I'll just go now.”

Rainbow turned around “No, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be angry with you; I've just had a bad day.”

“I just wanted to say how much I admire you” said the young pegasus mare.

'Well I am awesome” came the long conditioned response of the chromatic mare.

The younger pegasus slowly shook her head “Yes you are.”

“Well I have to be going, the weather team in Ponyville needs me.”

“Good bye, Rainbow Dash.”

Rainbow walked into the head weather coordinator's office with a small amount of well concealed dread. “Aero, there is nothing you can legally do to hold me here, so I am going back to Ponyville”

“Hope you had fun” the noblemare replied with a cruel smile “You know; I'm pretty sure one of my brothers would be willing to help you with 'your condition'.”

“I'm not sure any of your brothers could help anypony after their multiple nights with you.”

Aero's face paled with rage “oh, sorry, I forgot. You want to go back to spend some 'special time' with the mares of your weather team. Maybe that blind grey retard or the tongueless yellow waste of wings.”

Rainbow drew extremely close to the other mare “Insult me as much as you want, but never insult my friends” Rainbow turned and walked towards the door. She turned her head back towards Aero “Commander Hurricane would have gelded himself in shame if he had known what his descendents would become.”

Rainbow took one more look at the look of rage and hatred that had consumed Aero's face before exiting.

Rainbow was relieved when she saw that Ponyville was still standing and there was no apparent threat looming in the skies, waiting to thunder down on the town.

Rainbow spotted a couple of familiar pegasi resting on a cloud.

“Flitter, status report.”

Unfortunately it was not Flitter, but rather her sister that was the first to answer “What's up, Boss?”

“Cloudchaser, shut up. Flitter, status report.”

“Boss, why can't I give you a status report?”

“Because, Cloudchaser, the last time I asked you for one, you gave me a painfully in depth description of the last five stallions you bedded, and some kind of alcohol induced rant about how you were 'winning'.”

“But you liked it. I know you did.”

Rainbow groaned in frustration “I, quite literally, couldn't care less about your sex life, Cloudchaser. I just don't want to hear about it.”

“Fine, but Princess Twilight spread word around town that she wanted to show you something when you got back in town.”

Flitter's eyes widened and she started to say something but was cut off by Cloudchaser putting a hoof in her mouth.

“Everything's fine with the weather, you go see your friend.” Cloudchaser put on an innocent smile that filled Rainbow's heart with dread.

“Uh, okay. But I expect a full report on the weather when I come back” Rainbow fell into a nose dive before recovering and flying off towards Ponyville Castle.

Flitter spit out her sister's offending hoof  “You realize that you just sent a mare that is in the worst parts of heat into a castle with a recently mare-turned-stallion alicorn prince? Both of whom have shown signs of significant emotional instability.”

“I'm not stupid, of course I know that. And it will do some good and loosen them up.”

Flitter brought her hoof to her face. “Why do you seem to think that any problem can be solved with sex?”

“Because it always worked for me.” Cloudchaser said with a smile.

“Yes, but not all ponies are a nymphomaniac with a clinical lack of shame and a depth that makes a puddle think it's a mighty ocean.”

“I think I understood half of the words in that sentence. Although I don't know what puddles have anything to do with sex.”

“Arrgh. It's a metaphor, and it doesn't have anything to do with sex.”

“A metal four? Do you take the numbers off the houses owned by the stallions that you have sex with too.”

“Dear, Celestia, Luna and Discord, my sister is an incompetent!”

“Hey, I wonder what a night with Discord would be like.”

Twilight trotted down a narrow hallway, Shadow and Umbra had taken their leave to help Theory and Storm with the unloading of the numerous ancient artifacts that would now make their home at this castle.

As much as Twilight wanted to help catalogue the magical items, his next several hours were scheduled for his own research into cataloguing (and in some cases completing) the spells crafted by Starswirl the Bearded.

Twilight turned a corner only to see a multicoloured blur flying on a collision course with himself ...

*Smash*

“Rainbow Dash, what did I say about flying around in my castle” Twilight said to the mare that was currently atop him.

“Cloudchaser said that you had something to show me, and I think I like it” Rainbow had adopted an amateur version of a seductive voice before placing an inexperienced kiss on the top of Twilight's muzzle.

Twilight's mind was in turmoil. None of his other friends had reacted to his change like this; why would Rainbow, who was by all accounts the least interested in the other sex, be suddenly acting this way towards the former mare.

All of Twilight's questions were answered when he inhaled the frisky mare's scent. Her sweet, glorious musk. It all clicked, Rainbow must have entered her oestrus cycle a couple of weeks early. “By the Styx, Rainbow, you're in heat; get off of me” Twilight said, or rather tried to say; what actually came out of his mouth was more along the lines of “Mmmm, Rainbow you smell good.”

Rainbow responded by placing a sloppy passionate kiss straight on the alicorn's lips.

Twilight felt his own lips parting and giving the cerulean mare passage as the treacherous armies of animal lust conquered the fortress of his mind. The few loyal neurons in his cortex had lost all hope of adverting the imminent catastrophe and instead rallied their efforts towards damage control. And as such, the last conscious act of Twilight Sparkle on that day was to cast two spells.

The first was a powerful contraceptive.

The second teleported them both to Twilight's bedchambers.