Smokey Arrival
Chapter 7:
Royalty talks
Written by: Slayerbrony

As Chad and Twilight walked through the doors, he couldn’t help be have a small feeling of dread. He knew that if he was respectful and kind, he wouldn’t be seen as a threat. The problem was trying to keep himself from blurting out something that might not help, or possibly make him seem like a threat. He went through what he would say, how he would act, and if at all possible, keep himself from blurting out something stupid. As they came into the sight of the Princesses, Chad couldn’t help but blink in awe and slight astonishment.

Celestia and Luna, if Twilight’s twenty minute rundown stuck with him, stood side by side before him, giving him gentle and kind, but commanding and protective looks. To Chad, it looked like they were polar opposites. Celestia’s white coat shone like the sun and irradiated with warmth while her mane of cobalt, purple, pink, and mint green flow like water. It oddly reminded him of standing next to a creek on a summer day.

Luna’s look gave him a cool and welcoming feeling. Her deep blue coat combined with the galaxy in her mane, it gave him the feeling of standing in the night air after a practice game. The combined beauty and calming appearance of the two allowed his mind to ease up slightly, although his breath still came in deep shaky breaths and his mind was going at a million thoughts a minute.

Twilight walked over to the Princesses, giving them each a pleasant smile, and stood by Celestia’s side. It was slightly strange seeing their height differences so bluntly. Reminded him of those russian dolls. The amusing thought helped bring a small smile, albeit a nervous one, to his lips.

“Princess Celestia and Princess Luna,” Twilight began. “I would like to introduce you to Chad the Human. He was part of the source of the magic anomaly that we all experiences two days ago.”

Both of the Princesses looked over Chad for a few minutes, making him shift uncomfortably as he watched their gazes. The way they were looking at him made him feel like he was the frog in science class that always got displayed. It certainly didn’t help his mind ease up at all. The princesses let up and both gave him gentle smiles.

“I see he is much like you have told us about Twilight.” Princess Luna stated as she glanced at Twilight. “He is a very anxious one.” She finished her statement with an amused giggle. That positive response gave Chad a moment for mental peace as his thoughts stopped flopping around like a dying fish.

“Chad.” Celestia began, getting his attention to snap to her. “I assume you know why you are here?”

“I have a firm idea, yeah.” He said, giving a hesitant smile. Celestia nodded approvingly before she began to speak.

“Then you won’t mind if we ask you a few questions.” Chad simply shook his head, his mind starting to pick back up the negative thoughts of screwing up somewhere. “Wonderful. Let’s begin.”

~=~=~=~=~=~=~

They had talked from everything that could be thought of at the moment. From how he arrived, to his kind, to his eating habits, and finally his affinity for clothing.

“So you arrived.... Through dragon vomit?” Luna asked once more to try and make sure she was understanding his rather odd, and rather amusing if not disgusting, entry. Chad only nodded once more as Luna put a hoof to her mouth. She a little conflicted as to whether laugh or evacuate her stomach. She settled for giggling behind her hoof as Celestia simply did something very few ponies saw, if any. She simply facehoofed.

“That is... A rather interesting way to arrive into our world.” Celestia said shaking her head before giving Chad a sympathetic look. He simply waved his hand dismissively in the air before giving a chuckle of his own.

“It was really startling and really, really disgusting, I am not going to lie. But it was better than falling from hundreds of feet in the air to the ground below. At least the way I came through didn’t involve me getting physically hurt.” He said giving another small chuckle. ‘Although I am pretty sure I am mentally scarred from that...’

“I have one final question to ask before we finish with our little meeting.” Celestia began. Chad gave a pleasant smile, feeling much less nervous than he was before. “How has your stay been so far?”

Chad looked back into his memories since arriving here. He had been almost mauled by a pack of rapid roots that had a pack mentality. He had arrived in a most unpleasant way. Had the crap scared out of him more times than one. Finally, those elites that brought him here were complete douchebags to him. The only good memories he had so far was getting a new shirt and playing with the young ponies.

“... Not all that pleasant to be perfectly honest...” He said slightly melancholy. The princesses looked at him quizzically for a moment before he continued. “When I first arrived, I thought I was just being messed with and quickly found myself into a completely new land. Next thing I know, I am being attacked by wolves that apparently are completely made of wood and then saved by the dragon that vomited me up!”

He began to fidget in place as his little rant began. “I passed out after that and then I am waking up to an unfamiliar environment and quickly finding out that I am a alien on some unknown planet! I broke down of course, I mean who wouldn’t?” He soon began to pace as the princesses only listened to his words and watched his spastic movements. “Then, I am taken into a town and I have to sneak around like some sort of spy. I mean yeah, getting to actually bathe and finally sleeping somewhere warm was nice, but then I had the stress of meeting the rulers of the land on my shoulders. I mean don’t get me wrong, you two are awesome and look amazing! But that is some heavy shit, y'know!?”

Luna, Celestia, and Twilight all shared confused looks at the weird expression from the human before he continued. Chad didn’t know it, but as he spoke, his voice was becoming more angered and frustrated. “And maybe I’m overreacting! Maybe, I’m not! But I do know one thing! Those guards of yours, whom you call elites are total dicks!” Chad stated, scowling at the door behind as if he was hoping to set the guards behind it on fire. “I mean they threatened to chop of my dick if I so much as looked at you!? What the hell!”

“Oh dear...” Celestia mumbled, face hoofing. “I knew I should have checked the On-Duty list more cautiously.”

“And!... And!.... I need a cigarette!” Chad said as he stuffed his hand into his pocket and pulled out a small carton before looking at the Princesses, albeit he calmed his mind a little bit. “Is there a openable window I can stand by?”

Luna gave the human a confused nod before pointing to one of the stained glass windows before her horn lit up a small latch opened up a small window. As Chad felt the gentle breeze, he walked over and quickly opened the box and pulled out a cigarette and match. Luna watched him Curiously while Celestia rubbed her temples. Twilight let Chad calm his nerves while she nudged Celestia.

“What’s the matter?” She asked in a hushed tone. Celestia just groaned quietly before looking at her former student.

“I had forgotten about a few of my senior officers and how they tended to be rather overprotective. And I use the word loosely.” Celestia stated. “If I am not mistaken, it was Officer Buttercup.”

As the name left Celestia’s lips, Twilight couldn’t help but mash a hoof into her mouth to prevent the amount of mirth that the name brought her. Celestia picked up on his and gave an almost unnoticeable giggle. While those two discussed Buttercup’s issue and possible punishment for the harsh and unfair treatment he had administered, Luna had taken it upon herself to question Chad a bit more, albeit less important questions and simply more along the lines of chatting.

“What is that you are sucking on?” Luna asked suddenly, making Chad cough a bit as he inhaled a bit too sharply. He turned his head to see Luna giving him a look that much resembled a curious puppy, albeit a puppy couldn’t be this adorable even if they tried. After a small fit of coughing and pounding on his chest with a fist, he gave her a weak smile and showed her the lit cigarette.

“Well... Let me ask you this, do ponies have tabacco here?” He asked curiously. Luna only nodded before saying.

“We do, but most ponies use a pipe. Not a stick of paper.” Luna stated. Chad just chuckled and shook his head.

“Well that is pretty much all this is. It’s just called a cigarette and it’s pretty much what you said. A stick of tobacco rolled up in paper.” Chad said, giving her a small smile. “Think of it like a disposable pipe. And all you have to do is light it instead of packing the tobacco in and then lighting. Plus you can carry around a bunch of them at a time in a convenient little box.”

“Interesting idea. Does you race make many of these strange conveniences?” Luna asked only making Chad grin like a cheshire cat.

Back to Celestia and Twilight, they had finally agreed that Buttercup wasn’t going to be removed from his position, but he was going to be given a long class on standard and acceptable treatment of royal and foreign guests, along with having to foalsit a certain royal pony. Hint, his name beings with a ‘B’ and ends with a ‘lueblood’. With that in mind, they turned to find Chad and Luna chatting quite a bit. Celestia tilted her head a bit in wonder before the two walked over, Chad crushing a cigarette butt out and tossing it into a nearby trash bin.

“Have a nice talk?” Celestia inquired, raising an eyebrow and smiling at both of them. Luna only giggled and nodded while Chad simply mimicked the action, only not giggling. “May I ask as to what you two were talking about?”

“Simply what his world held. I must say, it sounds fascinating!” Luna stated giving Celestia a happy smile. “They have carriages that pull themselves and thousands of books placed inside magical glass!” Chad just chuckled at the childish way Luna described his world’s technology.

“Well then, we must go into detail later.” Celestia said, giving Chad a happy look. He only nodded and let out a relaxed sigh. He was feeling much less tense than before now. He had not only helped calm himself with the cigarette, but the nice simple chat with Princess Luna gave him a much better perspective on her. Celestia walked over to Chad and held out her hoof. “Mister Chad Holden, after this extensive meeting and questioning, you have brought much to light. I would like to thank you for your patience.”

Chad let out a deep and relieved sigh before gently, but quickly, grabbing her hoof and giving her a hearty shake. “Well thank you for not tossing me into a dungeon or something!” He joked getting a small chuckle from Celestia and Luna.

“You are quite welcome. But we would like to ask you to stay here in Canterlot for a few more days.” Celestia said she rested her hoof back against the ground. Chad raised a eyebrow before she began to explain. “It is just a simple safety procedure. It’s to make sure no pathogens from your world can affect my little ponies and vice versa for you. Also if you are ever injured in the future, we can simply give your anatomy information to a doctor to help treat you.”

After she finished, Chad let out a small breath he didn’t know he was holding. He let out a small nervous chuckle before hesitantly nodding. “Seems fine to me, although it is a bit unnerving...” He said.

“Do not worry, Mister Chad.” Luna stated giving him a reassuring smile. “They are not going to dissect you or anything like that. They are merely going to run a few magic scans to get your bone structure, anatomy, and maybe a blood test.”

Again Chad let out one more pent up breath. He didn’t like needles. Or doctors for that matter. Ever since he was a kid, Hospitals freaked him out and due to horror movies, now he had a minor fear of doctors, Not to mention his phobia to needles. He only nodded as he felt his previous nervous feelings slowly returning.

“Are you okay, Chad?” Twilight asked, nudging him his knee with her hoof and snapping him out of his stupor. He looked down at her and gave her a nervous laugh and smile, making Twilight just sigh. “You have a phobia to physicians don’t you?”

“Fear of Doctor’s, yes, quite a bit...” Chad said nodding, slightly shuddering at the thought of doctors. “And Needles.”

“Ooooh boy...” Twilight whispered out under her breath and raised a hoof to rub her temples.

Author's Note

Sorry for the short chapter, but there was literally nothing else I could have added at the moment.
But it does open up the next chapter! You can probably guess what is going to happen next.
Hopefully, I will not take fucking WEEKS to finish the next chapter.
P.S.:This is the unedited version, I will get this to my Editor later.