Chapters Autonomous Mare Prototype
Running is the only thing that dulls the pain. For the briefest moment in time, I can almost forget the jeers and haunting laughter. The clank of my metal hooves against the hard-packed earth, the breeze in my mane, the rhythmic pumping of my neck as I gallop forward; these feelings almost make me feel…alive.
If only the others could see me at these times. The pistons and motors and servos can move just as gracefully and just as precisely as the muscles and tendons they replace. And simply because my mind is a maze of circuits and logic gates does not mean I do not feel ashamed, or embarrassed, or hated.
I did not ask to be created; not anymore than the others asked to be born. Is not birth a kind of creation? Are we not each ripped from some ethereal void and thrust into a life we had no desire to join in the first place? Unlike the rest of the herd, I have a perfect memory of being brought online for the first time…
* * *
Boot ready
Social Skill.exe
Basic Emotion.exe
Advanced Emotion.exe
Cognizance.exe
Imagine opening your eyes in a new world that you recognize. Everything is fresh and familiar, wonderous and old; you see something strange in front of you, and you know exactly what it is and how it works, all without ever having seen it or touched it before.
“A.M.P.?”
Motors whined almost imperceptibly as I turned my head to face the unicorn to my left. A lavender mare alicorn wearing a lab coat and a pair of glasses; she was the first living being I’d ever seen.
She tilted her head and gave me a smile. “Oh good, you know your name.” She paused to write down something on the clipboard that levitated in front of her. “Welcome to the world, A.M.P. I’m Twilight Sparkle; it’s a pleasure to finally meet you!” Her voice was sweet and calming, as any mother’s voice would be to her newborn child.
“Greetings.” I recoiled a bit at the sound of my own voice. It was cold and metallic, almost emotionless. “I…am happy to make your acquaintance.”
* * *
My run today takes me to a cave at the base of the mountain. Twilight says I should stay close to Canterlot, where she can keep an eye out for me. She does not understand my need to be alone, my drive for seclusion. The citizens in the city point and whisper about the strange robotic mare that walks among them. The fillies and colts around town throw rocks against my metallic shell, just to see if I can feel pain. The further away I am from them, the less I can feel the heartache of being feared.
The dark quiet of the cave surrounds me and I feel peaceful for once. The metallic smell of the calcified drippings from the ceiling is somehow comforting, despite the rust hazard it presents to me. I find a dry place to curl up, and wish one more time for tear ducts.
I lie there for hours, watching the shadows grow longer throughout the afternoon. Twilight will begin to worry about me if I don’t return before Moonrise in a few hours. Regretfully, I leave the comfort of the cave for the run back to town.
I enter the first floor laboratory at the Royal Canterlot Observatory just as the sun slips below the horizon. Twilight is waiting patiently for me by my bed along with her assistant Phase Shift. Together, the two of them are the only family I have ever known.
Phase is the first to acknowledge my entrance. The light brown unicorn mare has been studying under Twilight for the past year and a half, and often assists her with research and experiments. Her blue eyes are slightly distorted by the photometrics of her glasses, but I have over heard many colts visiting the Observatory comment on her attractiveness. She likes to keep her soot-black mane pulled back in a pony tail while she’s working in the laboratory. “Good evening, A.M.P.,” she says to me. “Did you enjoy your run today?”
“It was pleasant,” I reply quietly. “I visited a cave at the base of the mountain.”
Twilight frowns at me, as I knew she would. “A.M.P., I’ve told you to stay close to Canterlot. It is much harder for me to protect you if you leave the city.”
I lower my head in apology. “I simply needed a reprieve from the other ponies.”
Twilight nods in understanding, then says “I know, sweetie. But in the city you have the basic rights of any Equestrian citizen. Outside the city walls, though, you are legally considered a machine.”
The word burns in the microphones of my ears, and I can’t suppress a flinch. “Please do not call me that…”
“I’m sorry, A.M.P., I know you don’t like that word.” She levitates her omni-present clipboard. “Would you like to just move on to your nightly systems check?”
“That is fine.” Phase steps forward to connect a series of wires to ports buried deep within my mane. I become vaguely aware of another computer accessing log files deep within my hard drives. The touch is cold and surgical, and I attempt to recollect a nursery rhyme I’d heard that day to push away the discomfort.
Birds of a feather flock together, And so will pigs and swine; Rats and mice will have their choice, And so will I have mine.
“What was that, A.M.P.?” Twilight asks me. “I heard you mumble something.”
“Nothing of importance,” I reply. Twilight and Phase finish their check and disconnect me from the icy touch of the mainframe computer. After saying goodnight, I am left to my own bed, tucked into an innocuous corner of the laboratory.
The “bed” is a nest of cellular memory foam sunk into floor level. This is to cushion my joints in a simulated low-gravity environment so as to relieve undo stress on them overnight, giving my pistons and gears a much-needed break. Twilight has encouraged me to decorate it with “personal flair,” and a hoof-woven blanket lies in a heap in one corner. It is emblazoned with the crest of Equestria. The pegasus mare I bought it from in the marketplace thought I’d been sent on an errand to fetch it for someone.
Also stuffed into the corner of one bed is the stuffed toy I acquired on a different trip into town. The memory it triggered was slightly more pleasant than most I had.
* * *
It was beautifully sunny day, and I decided that I would visit the park that afternoon. Twilight had recommended getting out into town more to meet other ponies, and however much I disagreed with her proposal, I was looking forward to some time out of the Observatory.
At this point in my life, before I was granted citizenship in Canterlot, the Princesses had mandated that a guard escort me on my outings into civilization. This was as much for my protection as the other ponies’; fear and outrage over my creation was widespread in those days.
As we trotted to the park at the center of the city, the guard said nothing. He gave a cautionary glance at a group of adolescent colts who were eyeing me with suspicion, and they quickly hurried on their way.
“Thank you,” I told him. He didn’t reply; they never did. Their job was to be intimidating. Mine was to be careful. But basic programming is not easily overwritten, and I was compelled to be polite even though I knew no answer would come.
The park was filled with ponies enjoying the sunny day. Families laughed and enjoyed picnics, their spread blankets recalling strange patches of geometric patterns on the otherwise untainted field of grass. Poets and musicians lounged under their favorite trees, writing new pieces for their own pleasure. Foals laughed and birds chirped and the atmosphere was light and carefree.
That atmosphere that shattered when I walked onto the mall. Balls fell out of the open mouths of ponies who turned to stare, then were picked up just as quickly when they recognized the armor of the royal guard. The fillies and colts ran back to their geometric safety zones, where their mothers held them tight and their fathers stood to provide a barrier.
The attention was still new me then, and I stopped to look about. The angry stares continued, and I sheepishly tucked my tail to prove I wasn’t a threat, and moved hastily across the open space to the seclusion of a hedge near the edge of the park. I lay down while the guard stood some distance behind me, watching everywhere for any sign of trouble.
With my retreat came the re-animation of the park. Everypony picked right up where they had left off, and the former peacefulness of the park replaced the late hostility.
I was content to observe the everyday interaction of the ponies in the area. It proved to be a useful tool for learning the ins and outs of normal social interaction, and I began formulating new social cognizance algorithms to aid me in my experiences with others.
I became aware of a particular little filly who kept glancing back at me. She carried a stuffed pony figure on her back, a light pink alicorn doll, and seemed to enjoy playing with her instead of with the other foals her age. I suppose that her curiosity eventually got the better of her, and she left the serenity of the mall to approach me.
She was a younger earth pony foal of a light orange color, with fiery red hair. She was too young to have earned her cutie mark, but she was full of energy and smiled as she walked up. “What are you doing over here alone?” she asked me in a squeaky voice.
“I am attempting to study the subconscious patterns that ponies exhibit in their daily social interactions so that I may build new subroutines to facilitate my own exchanges with others,” I replied simply. I was surprised to hear the laughter of the foal.
“You talk funny.” She giggled to herself a moment, then smiled at me. “I’m Pepperdance!” She pulled the doll off of her back and held her proudly in her teeth as she mumbled “And this is Princess Prettypants.”
“I am an Autonomous Mare Prototype, but you may call me A.M.P. as an abbreviated title for the purposes of this conversation.”
The little filly cocked her head at me “Amp? That’s a cool name. Where are you from, Amp?”
“I was constructed by Twilight Sparkle at the Royal Observatory…”
“Oh wow!” Pepperdance interrupted. “You know Princess Twilight? What’s she like? Is she nice? My daddy says she’s mental, but I think a Princess just has to be nice, doesn’t she? Especially since she’s also the Element of Magic and…omigosh, I just can’t believe you really know Twilight!”
The orange filly continued to ask prying questions about Twilight’s personal life, most of which I will admit I answered. She seemed to be beyond the need to breath for long stretches of time as inquiry after inquiry poured from her mouth. Eventually she seemed to calm down, and pulled out the doll again. “Wow, Princess Prettypants! I never thought we’d get to meet a pony who actually knows Princess Twilight.” She paused for a brief moment, apparently listening to the doll say something in return. “I don’t know, that’s a good question! Amp, Princess Prettypants wants to know if Princess Twilight likes cupcakes or muffins better.”
“Twilight tends to prefer muffins in the mornings and cupcakes in the evenings.”
“You’re saying that she likes both equally?”
“I…suppose that is an adequate interpretation.”
“Did you hear that, Princess Prettypants? Twilight likes both! That’s so amazing!” She paused again. “I know, so do you! You both have so much in common!”
The filly’s behavior seemed irrational to me. “Pepperdance, may I ask you a personal question?”
“Sure, anything!” the young foal replied, the smile never leaving her face.
“Do you suffer from schizophrenic delusions? I have been monitoring your doll and can detect no signs of sentience or life.”
Pepperdance looked shocked and gripped the doll close to her chest. “Are you saying Princess Prettypants isn’t real just because you can’t hear her?!” she yelled at me.
“I am merely speculating on why you treat a toy as a living pony.”
“Princess Prettypants is my friend!” she yelled again. “Just because you don’t hear doesn’t mean she’s not real!”
I had apparently crossed some social taboo, and ducked my head. “I apologize if I upset you, Pepperdance. I…I have never had a friend.”
The filly’s expression changed from one of anger to one of horrified pity. “You mean you’ve never ever had a friend?”
“No, I have not.”
“Never ever ever?”
“No, I have not.”
Pepperdance gasped and threw her hooves around my neck. “I’m sorry, Amp! If you want, I’ll be your friend!”
“That would be…nice,” I replied, and somehow I suddenly felt warm and happy.
“And Princess Prettypants will be your friend too! Now you have two friends!” She pushed the doll into my hoof, and I picked it up to examine it. One of its patchwork eyes was beginning to come unstitched and its once pristine blue coat was threadbare in places where the foal had rubbed it too hard, but somehow it was the most touching thing I’d ever seen.
“Thank you, Princess Prettypants,” I whispered to the doll. Pepperdance smiled as I said it.
“PEPPERDANCE!” a voice shrieked from across the field “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!”
“That’s my mommy,” Pepperdance said, pointing at a frantically running mare. “Hi, mommy!” she waved.
“Get away from that!” her mother responded. “You know better than to run off alone and talk to strange...things.”
“But mommy, this is Amp! She’s my friend,” the filly protested.
“Say goodbye to your…‘friend’, sweetie, it’s time to go.” The mother looked panicked as she glanced back and forth between me and the foal. The guard behind me had stirred, and was ready to jump into action.
“You had better take your doll back,” I said and nudged the toy back to Pepperdance.
Her mother shifted nervously on her hooves as the orange filly lingered near me. “No, Amp, you keep her. Princess Prettypants wants to be your friend.”
“Pepperdance, come on! It’s time to go.” The mother scooped up her foal and carried her off without saying a word to me. I saw the fire-maned filly wave at me from her mother’s back. “Take care of Princess Prettypants! She likes tea and cupcakes.” I could barely hear her add “And muffins!”
I looked down at the blue toy in my hoof before placing it on my back and returning to the Observatory.
* * *
I shake off the memory, content to let the past remain buried for now. I turn a few times on my bed and settle down next to the stuffed doll. I pull the blanket over both of us, then nuzzle her gently. “Goodnight, Princess Prettypants,” I whisper quietly. Then I power down for the evening, slipping into an empty unconsciousness.
“A.M.P., you seem upset.” Twilight is running a monthly diagnostic on me, looking for any programming errors that may have crept into my system. I have never cared for the unfeeling tendrils of the lab’s mainframe computer; that is no secret.
“I am growing weary of Canterlot,” I reply. I have not been out of the city since my last venture to the cave some eight weeks ago. Twilight’s royal duties have subsided somewhat, and she has been dedicating her time to me, constantly tweaking my systems to make my operations smoother.
“I’m sorry, sweetie,” Twilight says, distractedly looking at a monitor. “I know how much you like to run. Maybe we can go to the park later?”
“You would accompany me?”
“Of course! I’d love to spend some time in the park with my little girl.” This is a favorite expression of Twilight’s; she prefers to think of herself as a mother to me. I suppose there are similarities in their roles, but there are times I know that Twilight cannot see anything more than a complex computer. Regardless, I smile.
“I would like that very much, Twilight.”
She grins back at me. “Excellent! Just let me finish debugging this line of code and we can be off!” She says it like the updates won’t take another hour to complete.
“I have a question for you, Twilight.”
She pokes her head from around the computer terminal she’s busy behind. “What’s that, A.M.P.?”
“I have within my memory banks letters you have written to Princess Celestia concerning your studies of friendship. Am I to understand that at one time you had no friends?”
She looked thoughtful for a moment. “I suppose that’s true. I liked reading and studying more than I liked going to parties and meeting other ponies. I had Spike, of course, but I always thought of him more of a sidekick than a friend.”
“What changed?”
“Celestia sent me to Ponyville, where I met ponies who cared more about me than about themselves.”
“Is that how you would define your friendships?”
She laughs quietly and turns back to her computer to check the progress of my updates. “A.M.P., there is no one definition for friendship. It’s multilayered, kind of like cake.”
“You would compare your relationships to your friends to a confectionary dessert?”
The lavender alicorn falls over laughing. “Oh, A.M.P., you say the silliest things sometimes!” She continues to laugh for several minutes more.
“I am simply trying to understand your analogy.”
Twilight wipes tears from her eyes as she slowly gets up. “What I mean is that friendship has no set protocols. Like magic, it’s self-perpetuating. It cannot be forced or created, only carefully guided. It ebbs and flows of its own accord. There’s nothing material somepony can point to and say ‘that’s it’. It’s something that has to be felt out.”
“And that is why you built me,” I say quietly. “A…machine…to test that hypothesis. To see if an artificial being has the capacity to make friends. To see if friendship is a force that exists in reality, or merely in concept; a supercomputer capable of delivering unbiased results.”
She bristles at my statement, and chooses her next words more carefully. “That was your original purpose, yes. But you’re something more than that now, A.M.P. Not just an experiment; you’re like a daughter to me. I just want to see you happy.”
I sit quietly after that. Twilight seems perturbed that I phrased my conclusion so bluntly, like she does not want to admit it to herself. For a while, the only sound is the occasional notification ding from the computer.
“It looks like everything is running fine,” Twilight says later when the process is complete. She disconnects the data wires from my mane and stands back to let me get up. “Are you ready to go to the park?”
* * *
Twilight leads me to a smaller park tucked deep within the city. It is picturesque and serene, and this late in the afternoon, there are few ponies lingering about. I walk beside my creator as we stroll along a walking path.
“Twilight, do you ever miss the company of your Ponyville friends?”
“Everyday,” she responds immediately. “I don’t get back to Ponyville nearly as often as I’d like, and my stay there always seems so much shorter than I want.” She has the same wistful look in her eye that she always does when remembering her friends. “But Pinkie always throws the best party when I get into town, and Applejack always has some amazing new dish to try. Rainbow usually gives me some pointers on flying, Rarity has a new outfit for me to try, and Fluttershy is there to listen to any problems I’m having. It’s not so much the amount of time you spend with your friends, it’s the quality. Plus, I exchange letters with them almost daily.”
“What about your former assistant, Spike? You said earlier that you considered him to be a ‘sidekick’ rather than a friend.”
“My relationship with Spike has matured as well, A.M.P. He’s a dear friend to me, as well as a very helpful young dragon. I know I left the library in good hands.”
I ponder the things Twilight said for a while as we continue to walk. Even an introverted mare such as herself was able to make friends; how could it be so hard for me? The question turns in my mind and I am unable to come up with an adequate answer.
A loud bang brings me out of my introspection. A rock that bounced off my flank lies in the dirt where it landed. Behind me there is a group of adolescent unicorn colts, pointing and laughing. Before I can respond, Twilight rounds on the gang and flares her wings. “You leave her alone,” she barks in an angry tone. “Or would you rather deal with me?”
“I-I-I’m sorry,” the biggest one stammers. “It, uh…slipped out of my magic-”
“Enough!” Twilight yells. “Go home before I decide to test out my latest spell!”
“What spell is that, Twilight?” I whisper to her, but she silences me with a kick in the flank. Her distinctive aura forms around her horn, but she’s just holding magic, not actually casting.
The colts run off, yelling something incoherent about not being turned into bugs. Twilight allows the magic to dissipate and folds her wings down to her back. She turns to me and nods her head, motioning me to continue walking again.
“What would you have done to them?” I ask her as we continue down the path.
She giggles contentedly to herself. “Oh, nothing.”
“Nothing at all? Your posture indicated that-”
“A.M.P., I was bluffing.”
“Bluffing? But suppose they had not believed you. What if they had challenged your authority?”
She stops to face me. Her expression is soft. It is the same look I have seen the mothers here give their children. “They were just bullies, sweetie. That’s all. As a rule, bullies are simply insecure ponies who feel like they have to hurt others to make themselves feel better. If you stand up to them, they will usually back down.”
“I fear I may never fully understand pony behavior.”
She laughs again, and unfolds one wing to embrace me. “Don’t worry, A.M.P. That’s what I designed you to do.”
* * *
Back at the Observatory, Phase Shift completes my system check. “Did you have a good time with Twilight today?” she inquires.
“I enjoyed our time, yes,” I answer. “Twilight is often able to explain some of the more complex and irrational relations between ponies.”
“I would hope so,” Phase says as she disconnects me. “She’s spent the better part of ten years studying friendship.”
“She seems perfectly capable of dealing with almost any social interaction with such ease. I feel as though I could study for an indefinite amount of time and still be at a loss for normal conversation.”
She readjusts her glasses as leans up against the wall. “I think the key is just to be confident. If you have confidence in yourself, other ponies will be confident of you.”
“I am fully aware of my own abilities.”
The brown unicorn laughs a little. “That’s not quite what I meant. You have to trust that everything will go okay, and not be preoccupied with how a conversation is going to end. Try to live in the now, instead of freaking out about the future.”
“That is good advice,” I nod. “I will let you be on your way; I do not wish to make you tardy for your date this evening.”
Phase’s eyes grow quite wide. “How did you know I was going out tonight? I didn’t tell you…did I?”
I point a hoof at her mane. “You are not wearing your usual perfunctory mane style and you have applied make-up to your face.”
She blushes, and hides behind her dark hair. “Am I that easy to read?”
“You have adopted a routine, and based on your specific deviations from that routine, I can predict with roughly eighty percent accuracy-”
“Thank you, A.M.P., that will do.” She is slightly put-off by my frank assessment, but she smiles at me again. “I’m glad to see that you’re picking up on more subtle behavioral cues.”
It is a compliment, and one that has special meaning to me. “Thank you. Enjoy your night with Splice Bolt.”
My care-taker’s jaw falls open. “I have to ask how you knew that.”
“Twilight told me,” I say flatly.
She bursts into laughter. “Of course she did. Good night, A.M.P.”
“Good night, Phase.”
The lab falls silent after Phase leaves. Outside, the moon shines quietly, and the cloudless sky presents a perfect opportunity for studying astronomy. I climb the stairs to the eighth floor telescope, and train it on the constellation Orion. For the next several hours, I work my way slowly through the major constellations, then move on to the figures of the zodiac. I've just trained the lens on Virgo when I hear hoofsteps behind me.
Twilight stands behind me, with a stern look on her face. “You should be in bed,” she scolds me.
“As should you,” I counter matter-of-factly.
She cannot hold her authoritative look for long, and soon she breaks into a grin and joins me at the eyepiece. “You seem to like astronomy,” she says thoughtfully. “You know this isn't the first time I've caught you up here after-hours.”
She is right, of course. I often come here before retiring to study planetary motion. “The stars have an ordered movement, and studying those patterns is...relaxing. Did Princess Luna really create each of those stars?”
Twilight shook her head. “No, the stars have been there forever. Luna only organized them, categorized them, and named them. She even built the constellations for navigation and annual cycles.”
It appears to be an intense labor of love. “It would seem she cares deeply for Equestrians.”
“She does.”
“But if so, how then did she-”
“How did I become a dark tyrant whose sole purpose was to destroy the life-giving light of my sister?”
I whip my head around to identify the new speaker; Twilight seems equally surprised. Princess Luna had come into the room silently during our conversation, and stood in the doorway in full regalia. She spreads her wings and glides gently onto the observation deck with us.
“Princess,” I say, bowing to show proper respect.
“Please, rise,” she tells me. Her voice is not harsh or commanding, but neither is it gentle. She has given me an instruction, and she expects me to carry it out. I draw back up to my full height, but remain silent. “That was your question, was it not? You wish to know how somepony who loved her subjects would want to cause pain and suffering.”
Twilight shot me a worried look, not wishing me to incur the Princess’ ire. But she knows as well as I do that I will not lie. “Yes, that is the question I was going to ask.”
My lavender creator jumped into the conversation. “Luna! I don’t think you know A.M.P. She’s an automaton I built to test some of my more advanced theories on friendship.” She smiled nervously, anxious about what Luna’s reaction would be to my reply.
“I am aware of A.M.P.’s nature. She is a frequent character in your dreams, Twilight Sparkle.” Twilight grins sheepishly and takes a step back. The Princess of the Night addresses me once more. “Perhaps this will be a good lesson for you then, A.M.P. Please, join me in a more comfortable environment.”
There is a brilliant flash of light and the odd sensation of being stretched out and squished back into shape again. When I look around, I notice that we are on Princess Luna’s private balcony, set with chairs and tea for the three of us. “Please, sit,” she instructed.
We gather around her table and the Princess tosses her mane before beginning her story. “Just over a thousand years ago, my sister was forced to banish me after I attempted to alter the fundamental forces of the world. I shall not bore you with the details; they are quite widely known. I recall that your question was ‘why.’”
She pauses to take a sip of tea. “The answer is perhaps more simple than you realize; I was jealous.”
“Of Celestia?” I ask. “You were upset that Equestrians slept through the night and were awake all day, never appreciating the aesthetics of the night sky?”
“That was perhaps the superficial veneer that history has recorded, but it was not the true cause. I was envious of the love that they showed for my sister. Foals often complained of the night's arrival, and ponies would rise early to see Celestia raise the sun. Nopony took notice of the movements of the constellations until after my banishment. In my pain, I decided the best course of action to take was to take away what the others loved deeply. I decided that if I was not to be loved than I would be feared; love is dead in a world of slaves. Despair can drive a pony to do many terrible things.
“It is in our nature to want love, A.M.P.; it is in your nature too, I gather. Twilight knows this better than some. She understands that you have been growing despondent, and fears for you.” Twilight nods her confirmation. The princess leans in close to me. “Whatever happens, A.M.P., you must not lose hope. You must not allow grief to control you. You must not give in to despair, for that way lies madness.”
Twilight rests a hoof on my shoulder. “I know things are hard for you,” she says. “But always remember that your friends love you, and we never want to see you in pain.”
For once, I have no questions. I am content to sit quietly and analyze while Twilight and Luna continue discussion of other topics. After approximately an hour, Twilight decides that it is late and time for us to return to the Observatory.
“Goodnight, Luna,” she nods before turning to me.
“Goodnight, Princess,” I bow.
“Good day to both of you,” the Princess responds. “A.M.P., think well upon what I told you.”
“I will, Princess. Thank you for your concern and your advice.”
Twilight’s horn glows bright as she teleports us back to the laboratory. She escorts me to my bed, and after I settle into the memory foam nest, she kisses me lightly on the front of my head.
“What is the significance of this action?” I ask.
She smiles and meets my gaze. “It’s a sign of affection,” she says sweetly. “Goodnight, my little pony.”
Somewhere deep within the circuits and wires of my motherboard, a strange warmth springs up. It is an unfamiliar sensation, but one I find myself enjoying very much. I pull Princess Prettypants in close to my chest, and for the first time in my impeccable memory, I fall asleep smiling.
Countless streams of information pour through my mind; bits of data processed in the form of ones and zeroes. It is like a waterfall, this virtual cascade of information only my mind’s eye can see. It is a soothing experience, to simply observe the data points, rather than constantly trying to analyze them.
Phase Shift is using me as a mobile computer terminal while she conducts some experiments away from the laboratory. She usually likes to work in silence, so I have very little to do aside from observe and record. It is not a tedious task; it feels rather good to not have to continuously rewrite lines of code while trying to move about in everyday life. Instead, I am lying on the grass as Phase collects measurements of solar radiation.
“You certainly seem to be having a good time,” she says absently to me.
I had not noticed the slight smile on my face before now. “Perhaps data collecting is my special talent.”
Phase suddenly spins around from her instrument cluster. “A.M.P.! Was that sarcasm?!” she asks excitedly.
I frown. “No, it was merely speculation. A pony’s special talent is typically something she enjoys, correct?”
Phase laughs and returns her attention to her tools. “Of course, of course.”
Her reaction confuses me, and I tilt my head. “You are implying that I should be more sarcastic,” I say pointedly.
“Well, sarcasm is a fairly advanced kind of communication; to say one thing and mean the exact opposite is…well, it’s tricky, is all. So you can understand why I was surprised you’d be using it.”
“You thought perhaps that I had made a leap forward in my development.”
“Exactly.”
Phase returns to her experiment, leaving my mind thoughts free to wander. I begin to think about special talents and cutie marks. I wonder if I will get one; do cutie marks manifest in organic life only? Or is it a product of sentience? Are they products of a genetic component, or a magical one? It strikes me how little I know of my own nature.
I examine my body and compare it to medical standards for the average pony. At five and half hooves tall, I stand slightly over the average; enough to look a large stallion in the eye, but far from abnormal. Weight: 400 kilos. Significantly above average, but that can be easily attributed to my physical makeup.
My outer chassis itself is slender and fit, a testament to Twilight’s skill in efficient design. The hard white shell is criss-crossed with seams and dotted with rivets, but at a distance it is almost indistinguishable from a uniform coat. Black wires are barely visible where my limbs meet my torso, and the pistons and servos of my neck are covered by a ribbed, flexible, rubber boot. My mane and tail are composed of jet black fibrous electrodes that provide feedback about weather conditions, including wind speed, direction, barometric pressure, temperature, and humidity. By all standards, I appear to be a white earth pony with a black mane and tail, albeit split up by seams in the metal work and a gloss not attributed with normal coats.
I think about the normal fur and manes of regular ponies. Perhaps my physical appearance is what drives others away from me. It seems illogical though; ponies come in thousands of color combinations. I do not know why I would stand out so starkly.
The sun glints off of my side, causing a harsh flare on the lens of one eye. I have considered asking Twilight to provide me with a matte finish, and even briefly for a color other than white, but I doubt she has the time to repaint me with all of her work. Perhaps I can ask for it as a gift for Hearths Warming Eve.
“I’m finished here, A.M.P.,” Phase calls, breaking me out of my thoughts. The comforting flow of data has ceased and I have uploaded the last few bytes by the time I stand.
“Have you collected the information you needed?” I ask her.
“I hope so,” she replies. “But even if not, I have more than enough to sift through on my own.”
I help her pack her instruments into our saddlebags. “Do you believe your study will be enough to convince Princess Celestia to shorten the day?”
“I can’t say for sure right now. And it’s not vitally important; I’m mainly just interested to see if a reduction in daylight hours would be beneficial for the crops. In all likelihood, the change would be very minor. This assignment is more about technique and procedure than anything, but it might yield some interesting results.” She levitates one set of saddlebags onto my back and the other onto her own. Nodding her head in the direction of the city, she asks “Let’s go home, shall we?”
“After you,” I gesture. The brown unicorn sets off a trot, eager to continue her research. She is a dedicated student, and I have no doubt she will do quite well.
On the way trough town, we pass an earth pony dressed as a clown. A cluster of foals at his hooves giggles as he creates childishly simple figurines out of balloons and makes prat-falls. I stop to observe the situation.
“Do a puppy!” one excited filly squeals. The clown laughs good-naturedly, and deftly crafts a crude approximation of a dog out of a blue balloon. He produces it with a flourish, and all the foals clap their hooves together.
“Here ya go!” he exclaims, handing it to her.
“I want a giraffe!” calls one colt.
“I want a gryphon!” yells another.
“What about Princess Celestia?” a smaller filly cries.
The street performer creates simplistic renderings of the foals’ requests almost as quickly as the little ones suggest them. Before long, each of the dozen or so colts and fillies are holding their own balloon figures.
He catches my eye and calls out to me. “What about you?” His voice is high and happy. “What would you like to see?”
“Oh, I’m fine, thank you,” I reply, hoping to avert his gaze.
“Oh come on! Surely there’s something you’d like? I can make anything with these balloons, I can. Here, let me prove it!” He inflates a single balloon, pulls out a marker and scribbles a crude face on it. “See? It’s a snake!” The foals around him collapse in a fit of giggles. “Come on now! What do you want?”
I am about to decline again and back away, but I feel a bump on my flank. I turn to see Phase waving her hoof at me, egging me on. “Go for it! Clowns are so much fun!”
“Um…” At a loss for words, I quickly say the first thing that I come up with. “A sucrose carbon chain.”
He blinks at me for a few moments, apparently thrown by the odd request. “Well, if it’s a sucrose molecule the mare wants, it’s a sucrose molecule she’ll get!” I do not think the foals know what a molecule is, but they stare in rapt attention anyway as he inflates a number of balloons and begins linking them together. Not even thirty seconds later, and he is holding out a perfect atomic model of sucrose for me to take.
“It’s like science!” cries the colt with the gryphon balloon, and the foals around him squeal in delight.
I secure the complex rubber sculpture to my back, then turn back to the clown. “How did you accomplish such a feat?”
He taps his flank and turns so that I can see his cutie mark; a balloon structure of the Eiffel Tower. “Special talent,” he whispers. Then he turns back to the crowd of foals clamoring for more of his creations. “Say colts and fillies, if you liked this, don’t miss the Canterlot Circus next week! There’ll be more clowns, manticore taming, pegasus stunts, and a high wire! Sure to be lots of fun!” He passes out fliers to each of them. “Tell your parents; bring the whole family!”
The foals take the fliers greedily and scatter towards their homes, having bought the sales pitch. The clown gives me a flier as well. “You come out too! Sure to be a good time!” He flashes a smile and disappears down the road, honking his over-sized nose as he walks.
“I didn’t know the circus was in town!” Phase exclaims. “That’ll be so much fun! I hope Splice Bolt is free.”
The flier depicts stylized ponies performing acrobatic stunts and lists of the events. “It appears that the Wonderbolts will be giving a performance as well,” I state.
“You’re going, right?” Phase asks as we resume our walk home. “The circus is just too much fun to pass up.”
“I suppose it would provide an excellent opportunity to study behavioral patterns in large crowds...”
“Oh, wonderful! Let’s get Twilight to go too!” Phase exclaims. She canters briskly towards the observatory, leaving me to catch up.
* * *
“So, Phase tells me you want to go to the circus next week,” Twilight says casually as she disconnects me from the lab computer that night.
“I thought it would provide a good opportunity to observe group behavior in large settings,” I reply, mentally shrugging off the icy tendrils of mainframe.
“Not everything has to be a study, A.M.P.,” Twilight admonishes lightly. “You could just go to have some fun.”
“Social gatherings are rarely ‘fun’ for me, Twilight. Almost ninety percent of the interactions I have had have ended poorly.”
Twilight flutters her wings in frustration, resettling them as she tries to maintain her composure. “Well maybe this one will fall in that lucky ten percent.”
“I am not so optimistic. I would much rather take a run along the cliffs on the south face of the mountain.” It has been roughly fourteen weeks since I visited the cave, and I have not left the city since that time. The added stress of prolonged social contact is causing minor bugs in my coding to pop up; I have lately been experiencing an unusually strong urge for solitude.
“Perhaps you could compete in one of the races at the circus,” Twilight suggests.
“That is not quite what I meant…”
The princess walks me over to my bed and gives me a look that I cannot quite interpret. “Well, the point is that you are branching out from your usual comfort zone, and that’s what’s important.” She motions for me to lie down, and after I do, she pulls my blanket up over me and levitates Princess Prettypants into my forehooves. “Goodnight, my little pony,” she says kissing me on the forehead. She turns out the lights in the lab on her way out, and smiles at me one last time before exiting.
I do not go to sleep right away. Instead, I consider the logical implications of being optimistic and pessimistic about travelling to a circus filled with ponies that might panic at the sight of me at any moment. After chasing every possible outcome and whittling down to the few dozen with a greater than forty percent chance of occurrence, I decide to hope for the best but stay prepared for the worst, and power down for the evening.
I whisper to my doll before I’m offline; “I hope they just ignore me.”
* * *
Hundreds of ponies part around me and reform into a single mass of jumbled pastel colors as I stand just outside the entrance to the Canterlot Fairgrounds. Opening day of the circus has brought out the rich and poor of Canterlot alike; I am awed by the sheer number of other citizens. There is an odd anonymity to large crowds. While people continue to jostle me, they do not seem to notice me, and for once I am not the center of attention.
Twilight nudges my shoulder with a hoof. “A.M.P.? Are you ready to go in?”
“Yes,” I reply and trot up to the ticket booth.
“Five bits,” a clearly bored attendant tells me. I dig the coins out of my gray saddle bag and deposit them on the counter in front of him. He sweeps them into a collection bin and levitates a red “ADMIT ONE” ticket to me. “Have a good time.” I am not sure he means it.
“Go on, sweetie,” Twilight says. “I’ll be there in just a moment.”
The unicorn ticket taker jumps a bit. “P-Princess Twilight! It’s an honor!” An incoherent slough of words continues to issue from his mouth as I move beyond the main gate.
Inside, the fairgrounds almost seem alive. Everything is covered in lights that blink and chase each other, and lively tunes blare from loudspeakers everywhere. I can hear foals squealing on the midway, and the braying of exotic animals from scattered tents all around. And under it all, I can hear the constant incoherent chatter of ponies talking and laughing.
“What do you want to do first?” Twilight calls from behind me.
“I am…unsure. It is all a little overwhelming.” I glance over at the midway. “The foals seem to be having a good time over there.”
Twilight wrinkles her face in disgust. “Ugh, the games at a circus are all rigged.”
“The merchants are dishonest? They seem amiable enough.”
“Trust me, sweetie, you don’t want to waste your bits there.”
I watch a young colt struggle to lift a mallet in his hooves and bring it down on a strike plate; the weight on the scale in front of him rises a few hooves in the air, but falls far short of the large bell at the top. “That one seems straightforward,” I say, pointing.
“The old strength test gimmick? Really, A.M.P.? I don’t think even you could get it up there.”
“You have made it a challenge, one which I will not refuse,” I state, and step towards the squat yellow earth pony currently retrieving the young colt’s consolation prize, a small stuffed lizard.
I deposit the mandated 5 bits in his collection bin. The clinking of the coins catches his attention. “Ah, another competitor, eh?” He freezes when he catches sight of my mechanical body, but recovers quickly when he spots Twilight behind me. “W-well, step right up! Ring the bell and win double your bits back!”
Run: size-masscomp.exe
I raise the mallet over my head and bring it down on the strike plate with pin-point accuracy. The weight rises midway up the eight hoof scale, higher than the colt’s swing brought it, but it falls back to the ground again.
The vendor grins. “Oh, so sorry. You can swing again for two bits.”
Next to me, Twilight shakes her head. “I tried to tell you, A.M.P. Nopony can get the bell to ring.”
“Sure they can! Just gotta hit it a little harder...” The stubby pony seems intent on making a sale; he taps the side of the collection box excitedly.
“Let’s go,” says Twilight.
“One moment,” I reply. I reach down and pluck a small rock from the dirt. After calculating the appropriate trajectory, I fling the pebble at the bell atop the tower. It strikes, ringing out across the fairgrounds. I turn to the stallion. “I believe you owe me ten bits.”
“I don’t think I do.”
I play back the stallions own voice to him. “‘Ring the bell and win double your bits back!’” He stares at me, dumfounded, then turns to Twilight, who is struggling to contain her laughter. “Perhaps you should be more cautious in the wording of your sales pitches.”
I have a feeling he would protest further, but after he glances at Twilight once more, he reaches into the collection box and pulls out a handful of coins. “Congratulations. Now be on your way,” he grumbles.
I turn to Twilight. “May we go now?”
Unable to contain it any longer, Twilight bursts into laughter and unfolds one wing over me. “Come on,” she says. “Let’s go see what else there is.”
We wander through a sea of ponies, looking for anything that might be interesting. Twilight spots a sideshow that showcases various emerging technologies and we make our way to the tent.
Inside, the canvas shelter is overcrowded with various devices and demonstration. A Van de Graaff generator amuses young foals by making their coats stand on end. Plasma globes entertain the young and old alike, everyone seemingly awed by the way the arcs travel to their hooves and follow them around. Towards the back, a large tub has been filled with a non-Newtonian fluid, and ponies take turns jumping across it and, on occasion, sinking in.
Every nook and cranny of the tent attempts to showcase some kind of scientific principle, and the tent reminds me more and more of the lab at the Observatory. I start to relax a little, and start reading every explanation card I stumble across, eager to prove or disprove any theory that may be inaccurate. I am back in familiar territory again, and get lost in the wonders of science and logic.
At some point, I stop to look up and notice that Twilight is no longer next to me. I turn to look for her, but I cannot pick her out of the crowded mass occupying the tent. As I wander off to look for her, one pony bumps into me.
“Watch it!” he grumbles, giving me an annoyed look; when he catches my eye, his expression changes into fear, then to anger. “Oh, it’s you!”
“My apologies,” I say, trying to calm the stallion down. “I am simply looking for-”
“I don’t care what you’re looking for, you freak. You stay away from my family!” He gestures to a mare and a young foal.
I take a step back to try to placate the stallion. “It was not my intention to offend-”
“Yeah, right!” the dark green unicorn spits at me. “You belong as an exhibit in this tent, not wandering the streets of Canterlot.” Other ponies are beginning to form behind the angry father, and they too appear to be aggravated as well.
“Please…” I whisper softly. “I do not wish to cause trouble.”
“Then you shouldn’t have come here!” cries one voice from the growing crowd. “Why can’t you just get out and leave honest pony-folk be?” calls another.
Flushed with the confidence only a mob could grant a pony, the unicorn stallion from before strides over and strikes my face, then pulls it back so that our eyes meet. “Why don’t you just go run along now?” There is malice in his voice that I have never heard before, and it cuts deep into my circuitry.
While momentarily stunned by the hate I am experiencing, a foal in the crowd picks up a small rock from the dirt floor and hurls it at me. I flinch and duck away, but it is followed by a second, and a third. Soon there are rocks hailing down on my powder-coated shell, some of the larger rocks causing sizeable dents.
I turn to run from the angry mob. They are all shouting now, intent on making sure that I am, at the very least, considerably damaged. I break into a gallop and sprint out of the sideshow tent, not stopping when I reach the main gate to the fairgrounds.
I veer to the west, toward some of the highest cliffs on the mountain. The cave today has no appeal; I want to see the sky.
I climb to the highest point I can on the steep cliffs, and look out towards the horizon. I can barely make out a smaller town a few hundred kilometers from the base of the mountain; Twilight tells me that this is Ponyville. The train tracks are almost invisible from this altitude, but I can see the minuscule steam cloud that pours from the locomotive.
I stand near the edge of the cliff for several hours. After the events at the circus today, I feel despondent. I have done nothing to harm the ponies of this city, and yet they still push me away. Every time I set about to discern the answer to this problem, I arrive at the same conclusion: I am the one who is causing the trouble.
It does make sense. As the observer, I cannot rule out my own bias in the matter; it does not consciously occur to me that I myself am the problem. I am an unknown agent in this world. My place is not established, whereas everypony in the city knows their place. I am upsetting the equilibrium; I am causing others pain, by very nature of my existence.
I look down from the edge of the cliff. It is approximately 247.2 meters high. I run a quick few calculations, and determine that the speed I gain from the fall will be sufficient to destroy my body. I will remove the root cause of these ponies’ suffering.
I pause momentarily to consider Twilight and Phase. I cannot help but conclude my termination will be difficult for them. But the needs of the many must outweigh the needs of the few. “I wish I could cry for you, Twilight.”
I leap from the cliff, and feel the false zero gravity of free fall. I wonder what it is like to die. I read several dissertations on the subject in my first days, as well as several hundred poems on the subject. My conclusion: ponies are as ignorant to the nature of death as an ant is to the nature of Luna’s constellations.
The sharp rocks below are rushing up to meet me at a slightly faster rate than anticipated. I may have failed to account for reduced drag at higher altitudes. I consider powering down just before the collision, then realize I have no reason to.
As I connect with the unforgiving ground, my once pristine body shatters. My core processor stays online long enough to be aware of everything going catastrophically wrong, then it too begins to fade as the emergency batteries die. The last thing I am aware of is a sense of relief that ponies will be more satisfied with my absence.
Boot Ready
Social Skill.exe
Basic Emotion.exe
Advanced Emotion.exe
Cognizance.exe
I am back in the observatory. I should be dead. Twilight must have elected to rebuild me. These logical assumptions and inferences are the first thoughts to cross my re-awakened mind.
The second is the observation that Twilight is incredibly upset. She throws her hooves around my neck and buries her face in my mane, unfolding her wings to cover both of us in an intimate moment. “Oh A.M.P.!” Her voice is slightly muffled by the synthetic fibers of my hair. She tucks her wings back against her sides and takes a step back. “What were you thinking?!”
“I…I am sorry, Twilight.” Overridden with a sudden guilt, I cannot meet her eyes. She takes the cue to jump into a long-winded rant
“I just don’t understand what could’ve possessed you to…jump. Barely able to grasp existence, and you make a conscious decision to commit suicide!”
“I-”
“Did you even stop to consider what it would do to me? What it would do to phase? Even Splice Bolt was heartbroken!”
“I-”
“I know you were hurting, A.M.P. But that’s when you come to us.” She is crying now. All of the insults and hate thrown at me over the span of my short life have never made me feel this terrible. I want to hide and power off until she calms down. “We love you, A.M.P. Didn’t that mean anything to you?”
It takes me a moment to process what she has said. Perhaps I did reach an illogical conclusion. I certainly had not expected such a strong emotional reaction from Twilight; I make a mental note to brace myself for my reunion with Phase.
“At least tell me what your rationale was,” Twilight whispers tearfully. “I know you wouldn’t do something that rash without a good explanation.”
“Everypony always seemed to be upset when I was present,” I tell her. “They weren't angry about anything I did specifically; they just resented my existence. It seemed to be in the interest of the common welfare to discontinue that existence.”
Twilight slumps from her previously stiff posture and stares blankly at the floor. “And what about the rest of us? Me, Phase, Splice; even Luna was in tears! Princess Celestia wept for you, A.M.P. Did you ever stop to consider what your death would mean to us?”
“The needs of the many must outweigh the needs of the few,” I echo my previous thoughts. “…If it is any consolation to you, Twilight, my last words were of you.” I step over to the mainframe computer and recall my audio files from that day.
“I wish I could cry for you, Twilight.” The speakers in the lab reverberate off the walls, filling the silence that has settled over the room.
Twilight says nothing for an uncomfortably long time. I am just beginning to wonder what I should say next when she finally stands. I try to look into her eyes, but she keeps her head down, her mane hanging in the way of her face. She pulls me into another tight hug.
I feel the same spark I felt so many weeks ago. Somewhere locked within my circuits, a new emotion begins writing a new and complex code. For the first time, Twilight is more than an ally or a companion; she is a friend, one whom I have wronged dearly.
I squeeze Twilight back tightly. “I…I am so sorry, Twilight. It was never my intention to cause-”
She pulls back and puts a hoof over my mouth. “Shh, it’s okay. But there are other ponies who want to see you.” She presses the ‘call’ button on the intercom, and moments later, the double doors leading into the lab swing open, and all of the ponies Twilight had mentioned previously poured into lab.
“Are you quite well?” Princess Luna was the first to address me. I made to bow, but she quickly swept me into yet another embrace. “We were all so heartbroken when we received Twilight’s letters.” She stepped back to regain an air of royalty, but no sooner than that and I was pulled into yet another hug as Princess Celestia stepped forward.
“Never again, my little pony,” was all she said. I am quite sure it is a command, but it is one I suddenly feel compelled to follow.
The Princess’ responses were significantly more restrained than Phase’s; the tan unicorn bowls me over in a full tackle, crying all the while. “A.M.P.! I missed you so much!” Her voice sounds tinny as it echoes through my head. She has buried her head in my neck, and is sobbing almost hysterically. I stroke her mane to try to calm her.
“It…it is alright,” I whisper gently.
“But it’s not! Why didn’t you come to us!?” she cries.
“I made an error in judgment,” I say.
Celestia steps forward and towers over us. “And one I certainly hope you have learned from. It’s not every pony that gets a chance to learn from their own death,” she says darkly. “Remember well what has happened today.”
“I will.”
“Very good.” She turns to address Twilight. “Thank you for inviting us, my faithful student, but Luna and I must return to our duties…”
The younger alicorn pulls me aside while Celestia and Twilight exchange a few more words. “That was quite a foolish act from you,” she chides. “Twilight loves you more than anything, and you threw it away like it was nothing.”
“It was never my intention to hurt her-”
“But hurt her you did. How is she to trust you if you are so quick to throw away her affection? You are like a daughter to Twilight-”
“Do you think I am unaware of that?” I finally snap. “Are you aware of the guilt I feel for my suicide? I barely have a grasp on the most basic equine emotions and you wish to put me on the defensive about it? I am tired of being told I have to feel sorry for what I did, because I feel such a great regret I do not know how to express it.”
With my rant over, I finally see that Luna has taken a step back, and is staring wide-eyed at me. I turn to look back at the others, and each of them is staring at me with a similar look of shock. Turning back to Luna, I bow. “Apologies, Princess. It has been a very trying day.” Their expressions do not change. “I am going for a run.”
I step out of the lab and into the morning sun. I flex each joint experimentally, testing the range of motion of my new body. As I turn my head to observe my hind legs moving, I notice that Twilight has altered the paint on my skin. Where before it was a glossy white, it was now a matte-finished, off-white color.
I start running at an easy canter, weaving through the streets toward the main gates of the city. The other ponies turn to watch me run past, but they don’t seem to be as hostile as before. A few still glare at me, but the majority of them seem to look after me with something closer to pity or shame.
Outside the city, I break into a full gallop and race down the winding road to the base of the mountain. Every so often I pass a traveler or two, but the road is fairly quiet today. Even at top speed, it takes nearly two hours to reach the cave I had discovered nearly six months ago. I scuff at the ground with a hoof. I am relieved to learn that the cave is undisturbed.
As I pace around the cave, I think back on the other ponies I encountered on my run. I realize that my suicide has had a profound impact on everyone in the city, not just on my friends. Perhaps I have misjudged the true feelings and intentions of the rest of the herd.
Something in my aural processors begins beeping. I search my software files for the source of the noise, and discover a new program that controls a radio signal transmitter and receiver. It dawns on me that Twilight must have wanted to make sure she could contact me whenever she needed to. I activate the program and answer the signal.
“Yes, Twilight?”
The static that comes through is very minor, and I can easily hear my maker’s voice. “A.M.P.! I’m glad the radio works; I’m thinking of developing a hoof-held device for mass use. Where are you?”
“I am currently standing in a cavern at the base of the mountain.”
“Wow…I had no idea you loved running that much! Come on home, I have one more surprise for you.”
“Yes Twilight.” I close the program, and begin the long run back to the lab.
* * *
Twilight greets me as I walk in; it appears as though Phase has gone home for the evening. “You’re home!” she cries happily as she hugs me.
“Yes,” I state. “You asked me to come back.”
“Right, of course. I’m just happy that you’re okay.”
I can tell she is uneasy about leaving me alone since the incident. “I am alright, Twilight. I have learned a valuable lesson today.”
“Which is?”
“Self-worth. I have been overly critical of my own existence up until this point, and I have discovered a new-found respect for life; mine in particular.”
“Good, I’d hoped that’s what you’d have discovered. So…” she gives a soft smile, “you’re probably wondering what your surprise is.”
“It has crossed my mind.”
Twilight levitates a train ticket up in front of me. “Ta-da!”
“A train ticket,” I say.
She gives a sigh that indicates her exasperation. “Yes, A.M.P.”
“To Ponyville-”
“Yes, A.M.P., I’m sending you to Ponyville to continue your development. You’ll be working closely with my friends to learn more about friendship.”
“An interesting idea, Twilight. You propose to send me to a town where every-pony is less familiar with me. You hope that getting away from the city and the citizens’ presuppositions will be more beneficial for learning social skills. ‘A change of scenery’ is the colloquialism, I believe.”
My creator rolls her eyes at me. “Nothing gets past you, does it sweetie?”
“Very little.”
She shakes her head and continues. “You’ll be staying with Applejack, working on her farm to earn your keep.”
“Will you be staying as well, Twilight?”
“No,” she admits sadly. “I’ll keep up with my usual every-third-Tuesday visit, but I can’t stay. This is your adventure, A.M.P. You can do it without me, you’re ready.”
She seems slightly uncomfortable with the idea of sending me off on my own. I step in and give her a hug. “Thank you, Twilight. I will miss you.”
I feel Twilight grip me tighter and start to cry, and I stroke her mane to help her calm down. After approximately two minutes, she backs away and rubs her eyes. “Now off to bed, you silly filly. You’ve got a big day tomorrow.”
* * *
Twilight runs through her final-stage checklist for a third time at the train station. “Tickets: check! Overnight bag for me: check! A.M.P.’s portable solar-charging station: check! Looks like we have everything!”
“Great! Have a good trip, Twi, I’ll see you when you get back.” Phase Shift has accompanied Twilight and me down to the platform. “And you,” she says, addressing me, “You take care of yourself. No more jumping off cliffs.”
“It is my understanding that there is only one cliff in Ponyville, and that it may be avoided by bypassing Third Street,” I reply.
“You know what I mean.”
“I…suppose I do. Goodbye, Phase. Thank you for your companionship.” I give her a brief hug and step onto the train.
Twilight exchanges farewells with Phase and follows me onboard. As we settle into our seats, a few of the other passengers throw me angry glares, but quickly look the other way when they see the Princess next to me. The train begins to pull out of the station.
“Are you excited for this, A.M.P.?”
I look out the window and see Phase begin to shrink into the distance. I am leaving behind everything I knew, starting a new life away from the old prejudices that hurt me in Canterlot. I am leaving behind the only friends I’ve ever had, trusting that I would make new ones on the way. I pull Princess Prettypants out of my saddlebags and examine her momentarily.
“Yes, Twilight. I believe I am…”
I watch out the window of the coach as the train pulls into Ponyville station. Steam billows out of the engine as the conductor issues everyone off the train. I detect an eighteen degree rise in temperature here over Canterlot. A few ponies that have been on the train since Canterlot turn to sneer at me, but most of the local ponies ignore me.
Twilight, however, has a small crowd waiting for her when we get off the train. Lots of parents and their foals are gathered to greet their hometown princess. She greets them warmly and laughs as the foals rush to hug her. The parents stand back with smiles on their faces. I don't notice any of the pomp and circumstance that typically accompanies a visit from Celestia and Luna. Although Twilight may reside in Canterlot, Ponyville will always be her home.
"Everyone, I'd like you to meet a friend of mine," Twilight says, gesturing in my direction. "This is A.M.P."
There is a brief moment of stunned silence as everyone notices that I am not a flesh and blood pony. "Hello. Pleasure to meet all of you."
One particularly concerned mother leans over to Twilight. "Is it safe?" she asks.
Twilight sighs wearily. "Of course. I built her."
The group visibly relaxes, and while a few ponies remain hesitant, most of the group comes up and introduces themselves. They seem friendly and unafraid overall, which is welcome after the shunning of Canterlot ponies. I notice a few of the foals tapping on my alloyed hooves.
"Leaflet! Leave the poor pony alone!" one annoyed father calls. A green unicorn foal winces and runs back to him. The other young ones back up, but still appear to be curious about me. "I hope you like it here," a mother tells me.
As the group begins to congeal again, Twilight steps over to me. "You can go sit down if you want, A.M.P. It'll probably be a few minutes before we get out of here." She nuzzles me lovingly, and walks back over to greet her subjects. I take a seat on a bench under the platform's awning, and wait for Twilight to wrap up.
* * *
I walk beside Twilight as we make our way through Ponyville. "That was a markedly warmer reception over the norm in Canterlot," I say.
Twilight smiles and nods. "I agree. Ponyville is a much more welcoming place to live."
"Where is your friend Pinkie Pie? You had mentioned she is quite fond of welcoming newcomers." I am hesitatant to meet such a gregarious pony
"Don't worry, A.M.P.," Twilight laughs. "I asked Pinkie to wait a day before meeting you, so you have time to get settled."
"She was not disappointed by this?"
Twilight laughs again. "Oh, I wouldn't say that. She drew frowny faces all over her last letter, but she also said that she understands, and she wants you to be in the best mood when she throws you your 'welcome to Ponyville party'."
"I understand." The prospect of a party worries me, but thankfully it will be another day before I have to deal with that. Twilight told me earlier that I must attend, but I maintain my reservations. "So where are we going now?"
"I'm taking you to Sweet Apple Acres; you'll be staying with Applejack while you're here. It's almost time for the harvest, and she'll need the extra help around the farm. Apple Bloom was especially excited to get to meet you. She's developed quite the eye for good engineering."
"You are being a bit conceited with that statement," I point out.
"Not at all!" she smirks. "I am proud of who you are, not the fact that I built you. Besides, there is as much of Phase's work in you as there is mine. That pony's programming skills are phenomenal, as well as some of her theories on the magic of friendship and harmonic resonance."
She has deflected the question, which reinforces my theory. Twilight is indeed proud of her skill, and the adoration of young mare pleases her.
"There it is." Twilight points a hoof as we crest a rise in the road. Nestled into a vast expanse of rolling green orchards stands a large red barn and a sizeable barnyard. The simple farmhouse stood out in the south field, and a chicken coop rounds out the setting. It is very picturesque.
Twilight walks up to the house and has just raised a hoof to knock when it bursts open, and an orange earth pony with blonde hair sweeps her into a hug. “Twilight! Ah’m so glad to see you. Ah hope y'all had a good trip!”
Twilight smiles and returns her friend’s embrace warmly. “It’s good to see you too, Applejack. Our trip was just fine. I’d like you to meet A.M.P.” She gestures toward me, and Applejack turns to me for the first time, readjusting the tilt of her distinctive hat as she does so.
She runs over to me and begins the most vigorous hoof-shake I have ever experienced. “Of course!” she exclaims. “Twilight’s told me so much about you, it’s like we’ve already met. Welcome to Sweet Apple Acres!” As she pulls her hoof back, I make a note to check for burnt-out servos later.
“It is a pleasure, Applejack. Thank you for allowing me to stay with you.”
“Absolutely! Any friend of Twilight’s is a friend of mine.” She shows us inside, where the remaining Apple family waits for us. “This here’s mah big brother, Big Macintosh, and that’s mah little sister Apple Bloom. Kin, this here’s A.M.P. She’ll be stayin’ with us through the harvest.”
“Eeyup,” replies Big Macintosh. He is the most formidable draft pony I have seen, with a deep red coat and unshorn fetlocks. White freckles stand out against the fur on his face, and his brown tail has been cut short in a strictly utilitarian fashion.
Applebloom walks over and shakes my hoof, though in a much more gentle fashion than her sister. “Howdy! Ah’m Applebloom. It’s such an honor to meet you. Twilight’s sent me all of your schematics, and Ah’m just so excited to finally get to actually meet you.” Her mild salivation is uncomfortable, but moderately flattering. The younger sister displays similar phenotypes as the rest of her family, notably her blonde coat and bright red hair. A simple pink bow holds her otherwise discordant mane in check.
“Greetings,” I say calmly. “I am flattered that you think so highly of me.”
“Apple Bloom is going to be your mechanic while you’re staying here,” Twilight elaborates. “She’s been studying the technical plates diligently for about two weeks now.”
“Well, now that we’ve got the introductions out of the way, why don’t Ah show you upstairs to your room?” Applejack offers. “Apple Bloom’s been hard at work settin’ up your chargin’ station. Why, Ah reckon it’ll be just like back home in Can’erlot!”
Applejack leads the procession upstairs, followed by myself, Twilight, Applebloom, and Big Macintosh, respectively. She stops at the first door on the left side of the hallway and nudges it open. Inside is a tall white tower that is noticeably out of place in the rustic farmhouse. A black cable snakes out of the base of the unit and disappears into a bundle of blankets on the floor. A computer terminal dominates one side of the structure, and another cable snakes out the window, presumably to a solar panel on the roof. The rest of the room is simply outfitted. There is a desk against the left wall, and there are few simple paintings to add some color.
"Twilight told us you weren't used to havin' your own room in the lab, but we figured you might appreciate the privacy," Apple Bloom speaks up. "The computer tower is an exact duplicate of the one in Canterlot, so your power-down routine shouldn't be any different than back home. Ah had to install a lightin' rod on the house, but we were overdue for the upgrade anyway."
I am impressed with the quality of work she has shown in assembling the charging station. "Thank you, Apple Bloom. I believe it will fuction as intended." I drop my saddlebags next to the blankets on the floor, content to have found a good spot to set them down.
"Now, what say we finish off the tour of the house?" Applejack calls, and begins a brief presentation of the upper floor.
* * *
Applejack invited me to dinner, an offer I was told to accept despite the fact that I have no need of food. Winona, the family dog, was quite content to consume my share of the meal.
"Twilight told us you were havin' trouble gettin' along in Canterlot. Them big-city ponies can be a bit rough on newcomers."
"You have visited a large city before," I deduce.
She nods. "Ah went to live with my aunt and uncle in Manehattan for a while when Ah was a filly. I tried to fight who Ah really was." She drifts off for a moment and gives a sad smile. I can tell she's thinking about her experiences and give her a moment of quiet contemplation; she eventually comes around again. "Anyway, Ponyville is just the place to leave all that mess behind. The quiet countryside is just the place to find yourself," she smiles.
"Ah think she secretly misses the city," Apple Bloom says.
"You're plumb off yer nut, little sister," Applejack replies testily. "The farm is where Ah belong."
"Eeyup," nods Big Macintosh from his end of the table.
"Aw, c'mon AJ," Apple Bloom prods. "You can't tell me you don't sometimes wish you could go back."
"Manehattan was a nice enough place to visit, but I ain't got no desire to go back and put down roots."
"'Put down roots'... This is not an expression I am familiar with," I say quietly.
"It means she doesn't want to live in Manehattan," Twilight whispers.
Apple Bloom smiles and returns her attention to her plate. "Well, in any case, we're happy you decided to come back home. Right, Big Mac?"
"Eeyup."
The eveing proceeds in much the same way. The family dynamic between the three Apples is an odd one indeed. Applejack and Apple Bloom enjoy teasing each other while Big Macintosh sits quietly by. It is entirely unlike Twilight's relationship with Phase; the Apples are more considerate and loving than Twilight has leave to be with her student.
"Do you have dinner together every night?" I inquire.
"Ever since mom and dad were still around," Applejack answers. "Granny made sure we kept it up even after they passed on."
"It was the one thing that Pa always said made a family." It is the most amount of words I have heard from Big Macintosh since I arrived.
"Granny made sure that we always got together at least once a day. She never stopped talking about how important it was to spend time together every day." Apple Bloom seems sad now. "Even when she was in the hospital, we had...we had..." She is unable to continue.
Applejack puts one hoof around her sister. "We had one meal together everyday. The dinner table is the one place we can take time for each other, no matter what else might be going on."
The mood at the table sombers, and I feel awkward. "Tell me about your family's history in Ponyville."
Applejack wipes at her eyes with a hoof. "Right. Granny was actually one of the first settlers of Ponyville. Princess Celestia granted her folks the land the farm sits on, and the town just kinda sprang up around it."
"It's become one of the most up and coming towns in Equestria," Apple Bloom continues. "It's a proud testament to the Apple name."
"And none too bad of a place to get away from your troubles," Applejack says. She winks at Twilight.
"It was my understanding that Ponyville has been the epicenter of many of Equestria's major disturbances in recent history," I point out.
Applejack gives a hearty laugh. "Well, sure it hasn't been as quiet as it was in years past. But I reckon that's thanks to the arrival of Priness Celestia's protegé here," she says, gesturing to Twilight. "Adventure seems to follow her wherever she goes."
"Applejack is exaggerating," Twilight states defensively. "The history books in the Ponyville library indicate that this town has had its share of troubles long before I set foot here. The incidents seem to be clustered in ten-year cycles, with the average incident rate at the height of each cycle being roughly-"
I lose the rest of her rant in watching Applejack silently mock her friend with exaggerated physical gestures. The other two members of the Apple family supress their laughter with mixed effectiveness. I smile at her antics as well, while Twilight remains unaware as she cites facts and figures with her eyes closed.
"-and thus we can draw no conclusive causal relationship between my arrival in Ponyville and the incident rate of extraordinary and disastrous events."
"Whatever you say, Twilight." Apple Bloom rolls her eyes and picks off the remainder of her dinner.
After supper, everyone takes a share of cleaning up and we retire to the living room soon after. Applejack and Twilight catch up on some of the local events while Apple Bloom asks me about some of my more complicated systems. The young mare seems quite adept at complex mechanical theories. Big Macintosh is content to sit quietly and read the weather schedule for the following week.
The clock over the mantel strikes ten o'clock, though my internal chronometer marked the hour three minutes prior. "Mah goodness, I hadn't realized it was so late. I reckon we best be gettin' to bed. Will you be spendin' the night with us, Twi?" Applejack asks as she stands.
"I'm afraid not, AJ," Twilight replies. "I promised Spike I'd stay at the library. I haven't even been over there yet. We came straight here as soon as we got off the train."
"Golly, I hadn't realized! C'mon, I'll show you the door." The two of them get up and move for the entry way.
"Goodnight, Apple Bloom," Twilight says cheerily.
"Goodnight, Twilight!" she replies.
"And goodnight to you too, Big Mac."
"Eeyup." I note that Big Macintosh, for all his intimidating physical appearance, is very soft-spoken.
"A.M.P., why don't you join us?" Twilight asks, nodding toward the door.
I excuse myself from Apple Bloom's company and follow the others outside. Twilight and Applejack embrace once more.
"Why didn't you tell me you hadn't seen Spike yet? You know your visit's all he's talked about for the past two weeks."
"I made all the arrangements for this visit ahead of time. Spike knew it would be late tonight before he got to see me again." She nods towards me. "I had to make sure A.M.P. was all settled in here before I could leave."
"Thank you, Twilight," I say. "Your presence here this evening was reassuring and welcome."
She leans over and gives me a hug, wrapping both of her wings around me. "I'll be back tomorrow to take you to Pinkie's party."
"Not before we get a full morning of work in!" Applejack interjects. "The harvest is just around the corner and we've gotta gear up for the biggest crop yet! Hope you like getting up early, my little android."
"Automoton," I correct.
"Either way, we've got a full day of work ahead, so let's get some shut eye! G'night, Twilight. Tell Spike we said 'hi.'"
"I will. Goodnight everypony!" Twilight starts off at a gentle walk toward the lights of Ponyville.
"Goodnight, Twilight," I call after her.
After she walks below a rise in the road, Applejack turns to me. "Alright, A.M.P., let's get some sleep."
"Yes, Applejack," I agree.
We walk back inside, where the others are in the midst of cleaning up for the evening. "Alright Apples, let's hit the hay!" Applejack calls, and the four of us walk upstairs to the bedrooms.
Apple Bloom accompanies me to my room and performs the nightly back-up routine usually handled by Twilight or Phase. It is more awkwardly quiet than usual, and the cold grip of the computer seems even more uncomfortable normal. Apple Bloom is quite adept, however, and finishes with good time.
"Quite a wild day, huh A.M.P.?" she comments as I settle into my nest of blankets.
"Yes. There were a lot of unfamiliar situations to accomodate, though they were not entirely unpleasant." All in all, I counted the day a success, and had many things to analyze.
"Well, Ah hope you'll feel at home here. Now if you need anythin', my room is right nextdoor, don't hesitate to knock."
"Thank you, Apple Bloom. Goodnight."
"Goodnight." She turns off the light on her way out the door.
I pull Princess Prettypants out of my saddlebags and hold her close. "An exhausting day, Princess Prettypants," I say quietly. "I hope the Ponyville residents will be more accepting than their Canterlot cousins." The doll is, as usual, silent. "The Apples seem nice enough, though." I give her a quick kiss, and shut down for the night.
A Hard Day's Labor, A Hard Night's Party
My hooves slam into the hard wood of the apple tree. The tree shudders slightly, and approximately half of the apples in the crown fall to the ground, only a third of them landing in the basket sitting at the foot of the tree.
"Kick it harder, girl!" Applejack yells at me. "Get angry with it!"
We have been working in the fields to the south since near dawn. Applejack has been trying all morning to teach me how to, as she terms it, "applebuck." It annoys me that I am not as efficient as she is. "I apologize, Applejack. I was not aware that this would be as difficult as it is proving to be."
"Don't sweat it, A.M.P.," she replies. "You've just got soft hooves. Must be all that time lounging about in the castle."
I examine my foot plates. "My hooves are made of a titanium alloy, with a tensile strength of approximately 65,000 pounds-per-square-inch. It ranks at a 6.2 on the Mohs hardness scale, making it far harder and more durable than any standard pony hoof."
Applejack stares at me for a moment, seemingly dumbfounded, before she finally shakes her head and speaks. "There's no reason to get all defensive, sugar cube. Ah just meant that you're not used to hard work like this." She walks up to the tree I had just been attempting to clear and delivers a swift blow. The tree shudders and the remaining apples drop neatly into the basket. "Applebuckin' is a time-honored, Apple family tradition," she explains. "No one expects ya to get it right on the first try."
"I have been analyzing your technique all morning," I say. "I had believed that I had formulated the appropriate algorithms to replicate the effects."
Applejack chuckles. "It's not the technique, A.M.P. All the fancy mathematics in the world can't replace a genuine heart." She taps at my chest plate, approximately where my heart would be. "Ya can't constantly analyze everything, tryin' to reason out the perfect answer, ‘cause most of the time there ain’t one. Sometimes, ya gotta feel your way through your troubles."
"I am not sure I can do that," I say, not meeting her gaze.
"Well, you'll never get it with that attitude!" She leads me to the next tree. "Now, forget all that stuff about algorithms and technique, and just buck those apples!"
"I do not believe this will-"
"Quit yer blabbin' and buck the tree, girl!"
I raise my hind legs like Applejack had demonstrated earlier. I quit the routine I'd written for this task mid-run in an attempt to follow Applejack's advice. I closed my eyes and lashed out, willing the crop of apples to the ground.
"Atta girl!" I hear Applejack yell. I open my eyes to see all but one apple on the ground, with only a handful having missed the target basket.
I smile at the cheering farm-pony. "I suppose you were right. Perhaps there is more to this than just technique."
* * *
The morning wears on, and we make our way through each of the southern fields, one tree at a time. I am averaging a success rate of close to sixty percent, out of almost one hundred fifty trees. Applejack has yet to miss a single apple.
"Let's take a break, A.M.P.!" the orange earth pony calls. "It's gettin' a might thirsty out here."
I take that to mean that she wants a drink of water, and I join her at the water pump a few yards away. Her hat lies on the ground next to her and her blonde hair flows freely beneath the gushing tap. After a minute of cooling herself, she turns her head to one side and gulps down several mouthfuls of water.
"Ah don't suppose you'd like a turn," she says.
"No, thank you. Being drenched is a state I prefer to avoid."
"Oh, right." She shakes the excess water out of her hair and replaces her hat. "I keep forgettin' you're a robot."
"Automoton," another voice corrects her. We both turn to see Apple Bloom walking down the trail from the farmhouse, carrying her set of saddlebags. "How y'all doin' out here?"
"Just on break, little sis," Applejack replies. "How's Big Mac doin' with the cornfields?"
"Movin' through 'em no problem. How's everything here?"
Applejack wraps a hoof around my neck. "Our little android here is a regular apple bucker. We'll have her up to snuff in no time!"
I make a mental note to look up the etymology of the phrase "up to snuff" when I have the time. "It has been a tedious journey, but I believe I am beginning to acquire the… ‘knack’... for it."
"Well, good! Ah'm glad you're pickin' up on it. Ah just came by to make sure your systems weren't bein' overloaded from all the work." Apple Bloom produces a small display from her saddlebag and walks around me while it boots up. "Y'all haven't been too rough, have ya?"
"No, all work has been within optimal parameters thus far."
Apple Bloom nods and plugs the monitor in, looking rather intently at the screen. The icy tendrils from the display are quite subdued from the full size unit in my room, but it is still uncomfortable. "Your left rear number four servo needs a little adjustment, and you're burning battery life at a slightly accelerated rate, but everything else checks out!" She gives me a smile and puts the display away. "Are you having a good time, A.M.P.?"
"It is not what I define as a 'good time', Apple Bloom, but I do enjoy having a task to accomplish."
"And it's such a pretty day, too! Ah reckon we couldn't ask for a better start to apple buck season!" Applejack shakes the water out of her hair and replaces her hat. "Alright, back to work, y'all!"
* * *
We break for lunch after midday, and the Apple family retires to the farmhouse. While Apple Bloom and Big Macintosh rest on the couches in the living room, Applejack begins lunch preparations in the kitchen. Slightly puzzled by the unspoken allocation of duties, I approach the orange earth pony. "I have a question, Applejack."
She looks up from what appears to be an impressive sandwhich line. "Sure thing, Sugarcube! What can Ah do ya for?"
I file the odd diction away for further analysis. "I am curious as to how it was decided that you would prepare lunch for the others."
Applejack chuckles. "Well, shoot, darlin'. It's 'cause I had help this mornin'. The others didn't."
"So you based you decision on a principle of genaralized reciprocity based on your perceived exertions of labor."
She blinks at me a few times before shaking her head and continuing. "Ah suppose that's one way of lookin' at it. The fact of the matter is we've all been workin' hard this mornin'. But since Ah spent a lot of mah time coachin' you through the work, Ah decided Ah'd fix lunch for everypony. It's not really about who did what, it's about doin' somethin' nice for the ponies you care about."
I nod to her in understanding. "I see your point. Do you require assistance here?"
"Nah, Ah think Ah can handle it," she replies. "Why doncha go take a seat in the family room? It'll be a few minutes before lunch."
* * *
We return to the orchard after lunch to contiue working through the apple trees. We proceed at a pace that Applejack finds adequate, albeit slower than her average, until dusk, when Apple Bloom calls out that Twilight is on her way up the road.
"Quittin' time!" Applejack calls out. She picks up the last couple of baskets and makes her way toward the barn. I follow suit.
"Good evening, Applejack!" Twilight calls from the road.
"Evenin', Twi!" the farm pony responds. "Y'all head on up to the house. We'll be there in a jiffy!"
We deposit the apples in the cellar under the barn, and return to the house to join the others. Big Mac and Apple Bloom have already washed and are talking to Twilight in the living room. As we walk in, Twilight runs over to give me a hug. "There's my girl! How was your first day on the farm?"
"Productive," I reply. "By my calculations, we harvested approximately 40% of the apples on the farm, putting us roughly one hour, twenty-two minutes ahead of schedule."
Twilight gives Applejack a puzzled look, which the farm pony returns with a shrug. "She's a hard worker; we're glad for the extra help."
My creator turns back to me with a gentle smile. "Well, I'm glad you had a good day. Are you ready to meet everyone else? Pinkie was just about to burst with excitement before I left."
"Left where?" I ask
"The library! Pinkie insisted that we throw your 'welcome-to-Ponyville' party in the library. Half the town must be crowded in there by now."
"I see..."
"Everythin' alright, A.M.P.?" Apple Bloom inquires.
"I admit a certain amount of trepidation at the thought of a large social gathering. In past encounters, my prescence has made many ponies uncomfortable."
"This party's for you, sweetie," Twilight says.
"Regardless, has no one considered the possibility that I did not request this party and have no desire to attend it?"
"Ya can't avoid parties forever, A.M.P." Apple Bloom interjects. "At least at this one you'll have ponies you'll know."
I ponder this a moment while everyone waits for my decision. "You present a valid point, Apple Bloom," I finally concede. "Very well. Let us be off."
* * *
Twilight insists on being the first one through the door once we reach the library. "Pinkie has a habit of jumping out to surprise ponies. This way the trap is sprung by someone who is more prepared for it." However, before she can turn the latch, it opens from the inside.
What I believe at first to be a large, pink hairball appears in the door. "Hi, Twilight!" it exclaims rather loudly. "I know you thought I would set a surprise greeting even when you told me not to and would come in first, and I was really tempted to, but then I remembered that you said that A.M.P. was sensitive about parties and big groups and surprises and non-sequitors, so I decided not to! Oh, is this A.M.P.?"
It is quickly apparent that this must be the legendary Pinkie Pie that Twilight has so oft spoken of. She bursts out of the library more rapidly than I thought possible of organic life, stopping inches short of my face. Her smile is easily the largest feature on her face, its intensity only rivaled by that of her massive, curly pink mane.
"Hi! I'm Pinkie Pie! And this is your 'Welcome-to-Ponyville' Party! When Twilight said that she was bringing her automaton to Ponyville to study friendship just like she did, I knew that the best way to get introduced to everypony would be with a party in the library, just like when Twilight was here!" She does not give me time to respond before grabbing my hoof and pulling me around the inside of the tree, milling about with what appears to be the majority of the town's population. She rattles off names and features of the town, and I make a mental note that Pinkie must have an eidetic memory.
Pinkie must also be a master of theatricality, as she saves the remaining three Elements for last. "And finally, we have Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Rarity! Twilight said you'll probably be spending most of your time with them!"
It is Rarity who first steps forward, hugging me lightly but warmly. "It is an absolute pleasure to meet you, darling," she fawns.
"Hi, I'm Rainbow Dash, best flier in all of Equestria!" The boldly colored pegasus holds out a hoof, which I bump tentatively. "What was that?" she asks disappointedly. "Hit it a little harder!" I reach back, and knock my hoof against hers loud enough for an audible smack. "Better. We'll work on it."
The last to step up and welcome me is the quiet yellow one. "Um, hi," she says, barely loud enough for my audio processors to make out over the noise of the party. "I'm Fluttershy." She makes only fleeting eye contact, and trembles slightly. It seems I am not the only one who gets nervous at social functions.
"It is nice to meet all of you," I say. "Twilight tells me you will be my primary contacts in Ponyville. I look forward to getting to know each of you personally."
Pinkie takes that as her cue to call out to the rest of the crowd, from behind a record player, "Let's get this party started!" Loud music begins to play from the gramophone. I make a note that she moves with an uncanny stealth and speed.
For the first part of the party, I stand off to one side of the library. Many of the Ponyville residents make their way to me and ask the same questions, primarily involving my former life in Canterlot, or how I am acclimating to Ponyville. I politely answer their questions, but deflect as many of them as I can.
I find myself incapable of determining whether or not the ponies in this town are trying to be genuine, or are putting on a brave face for the sake of the princess. As such, I decide that staying defensive is the best move, and most everypony picks up on it and moves along rather quickly. Unavoidably, Pinkie comes over to speak with me.
"Whatcha doing standing over here away from the party, silly?" she asks.
"I am not comfortable with large crowds, Pinkie Pie."
She cocks her head at me. "This is hardly a large crowd," she says indignantly. "Not even a third of the town is here! These are just some of Ponyville's more common citizens. Most everypony here runs a shop or a public service; they're the ones you're most likely to bump into on a stroll down main street. Practically none of the foals are here, and most of the day laborers are home sleeping!"
"Still, I find social situations exhausting at best, and stressful at worst."
"You just need to lighten up, silly filly! Get out on the dance floor and shake those hooves!" She jumps behind me, and pushes me toward a group of ponies who are dancing along to the music.
I smile awkwardly and attempt to mimic their movements, but the sudden, unpredicted change of pace threatens to overwhelm my processors. I notice that virtually everyone in the library is looking at me, many of them hiding giggles behind their hooves. I attempt to smile again, but it comes across as more of a grimace, and try to back out of the attention of the crowd.
Their eyes continue to follow me back towards my corner. I break eye contact, and commit myself to staring penitently at the floor. After a moment, one of the ponies approaches me.
"Are you okay?" he asks.
I'm sure that if I had sweat glands, they would be over-producing at the moment. "...Yes." I feel guilty for lying, but I would really just rather avoid the confrontation altogether.
"Are you sure? You don't seem so well." He steps forward and reaches out a hoof.
"Yes, quite sure," I respond quickly. "I just need a moment outside. The heat in the room is causing my cooling system to run in excess of standard operation. Please excuse me."
Without another word, I brush past the stallion and walk outside. There are a few ponies just outside the door cooling down as well, but I make no contact with them. After taking a few paces beyond the light spilling out onto the front lawn, I stop to look back.
I know that Twilight and the others organized this party to try to help me grow, but I think that this is one instance where they made a mistake. It is only outside that I notice how loud it had been inside. I make a decision that I have never made before in my life.
I disobey an instruction from Twilight, and set off for Sweet Apple Acres. And I do so without saying good-bye to anypony.
* * *
At home, I plug myself and perform a quick back-up save. It takes me some time to sort out the emotions that I feel: guilt, for having left the party against Twilight's wishes; stress, as a result of being unable to assemble an accurate, over-arching picture of the whole party; and fear I that unintentionally offended somepony during the evening.
I pull my stuffed doll close to me and snuggle up to it. It would be so much simpler if ponies were as non-judgemental and loving as stuffed animals. The lessons I learned on the farm today will serve me well in the future, but I can't help but think that Twilight's reasoning was flawed while trying to organize the party. "I guess they're not always right about everything, Princess Prettypants."
* * *
Dear Princess Celestia,
I am sure that by now you are aware of the tragedy. I am currently attempting to recover the contents of A.M.P.’s memory drives in an effort to discover what could have possessed her to jump from the West Cliffs.
I have already determined I will rebuild her. Phase has put her own studies on hold to help me fabricate A.M.P.’s new body (against my wishes, but she was persistent). I know A.M.P. was close to an emotional breakthrough. She had recently spoken of a strong desire to make friends, and I will not let her full potential to go unrealized.
It is clear to me now that Canterlot is no place for my filly. With your permission, Princess, I am sending her to Ponyville to spend time with the other Elements. I have already written letters to the girls, and they are all excited and eager to help.
Princess…I love A.M.P. far too much to just let her go. She can be happy, if she can just find ponies who love her.
Your Faithful Student,
Twilight Sparkle