Our story begins in Ponyville, in a room of the house of the mayor. Swiftly yet quietly, the mayor and his fiancee enter the room, along with the Master of the Revels and their attendants.
"Now, dear Derpy," Dr. Whooves, the Mayor of Ponyville said. "Our marriage hour carries on swiftly. Four joyous days bring in nights. Oh, but I believe, how sluggishly the elderly moon decreases! She halts my desires, like to a married mare or widow, extensively thinning out a colt's income."
"Four days will swiftly turn to nights," Derpy replied. "Four nights will sleep the night away. The moon, like a horseshoe, freshly bent in the sky, will shine above us on the night of our vows."
"Go, Spike," the Mayor demanded. "Awaken the Ponyville children to festivities. Wake the fillies and colts to much amusement and joy. Send the distraught to funerals, Spike. The melancholy ponies are not the perfect accompaniment for our ceremony."
Spike the dragon exited quickly and quietly to do as he was told.
"Derpy, I entranced you with my talent and gained your love with my words. However, I will marry you in a different way. I shall marry you with ceremony, glory, and with festivities."
The door opened before Lady Derpy had a chance to respond. Into the room trotted Caramel, Rainbow Dash, Soarin, and Rapidfire.
"Joyous, you seem, Doctor, our beloved Mayor!"
"Of course, good Caramel. What may I assist you with on this surprise visit?"
"Whooves, I come to your house full of frustration and complaint. The complaint is against Rainbow Dash, my daughter. Come forward, Rapidfire."
The stallion stepped forward.
"Beloved Mayor, this stallion has my permission to marry her. Step forward, Soarin."
Caramel hissed the last sentence. The stallion named Soarin timidly stepped forward.
"And, noble Mayor whooves, this stallion has cursed my child. You, you, Soarin, you have given her poems, exchanged love tokens with her. You have serenaded her by moonlight at her window! You sung verses of love, and pretended love at that, with a faked voice to make it worse! You took the vision of her dreams with jewelry made of hairs from your mane, bracelets, trinkets, sweets, messengers telling of your love for her! With much skill and slyness, you have changed her heart. You have changed her attitude from obedience to stubborn rudeness towards me! And, my dear, dear, Dr. Whooves, make it so she will here before you vow to marry Rapidfire. I plead from you the ancient privilege of Equestria, to dispose of her either in death or in marriage to Rapidfire as is stated plainly in our law."
"What do you have to say for yourself, Rainbow? Be warned, dear pony, your father should be held as a god. One that gave you your beauties. You are as a form in foam by him carved and by his control to leave the image or distort it. Rapidfire is a worthy gentlecolt."
"So is Soarin," Rainbow Dash muttered.
"On his own, he is. But, in this circumstance, the other should be held higher."
"I would if my father looked through my eyes."
"More your eyes should look with his judgement."
"I do ask you to pardon me. I do not know what has made me so brash, or how it may involve my modesty. However, in such a meeting here to present my thoughts, I plead you, your grace, that I may hear what the worst punishment will be if I refuse to marry Rapidfire."
Dr. Whooves took a deep breath and shook his head.
"Either you will die or to renounce for eternity the world of stallions. Therefore, Rainbow Dash, question your wants. Know your youth, investigate your blood. If you do not do your father's will, you can endure the life of a priest, to live alone your entire life, chanting songs of old to the moon, blessed three time as priests are, and undergo maiden travels. However, the happiness of Equestria grows, lives, and perishes in a single blessing."
"I will grow, live, and die as you have said, good Mayor," Rainbow Dash replied with passion. "And I will hold up my virgin status. However, unto my father's unwanted harness I will not give authority."
"Take some time to think. by the night Derpy and I are to be married, be prepared to die, or marry Rapidfire. Or, to become a priest of the female variety for a life lived alone."
"Turn, dearest Rainbow Dash!" Rapidfire murmured. "As for you, Soarin, hear my words. Give up your insane title to what is rightfully mine!"
"You have her father's love, Rapidfire," Soarin began. "But I beg of you, allow me to have Rainbow's!"
"Stubborn you are, Soarin! It is true, Rapidfire possesses my love. What is mine my love will give to him Rainbow Dash is mine, therefore I hereby give her to Rapidfire!" Caramel stated.
"I gracious Mayor, am as good as he. My love, however, is more than his, my wealth as great as his in every way, if not with leeway like Rapidfire!"
As Soarin talked, the room stared in awe. Soarin never spoke this loud!
"And, what else, may I add, is greater in significance than the rest of these, Rainbow Dash loves me! Why can I not lay claim to my right? Rapidfire I'll assert it to his mane! He made love with Daring Do's daughter, Lightning Dust, and won her love, and she, gentle, kind mare, is extremely fond, downright fond of him, this inconsistent stallion so named Rapidfire!"
"I must admit that I have heard all of this," the Mayor said with surprise. "And with Rapidfire's record overflowing with self-affairs, my brain undoubtedly lost it. But, come, Rapidfire and Caramel. I have some news for you both. And you, Rainbow Dash, prepare to change your desires to match your father's will, or else the ancient law of Equestria holds you up. Either you must die, or agree to single life. Come with us, Derpy, my love. Come along, Caramel and Rapidfire. I have some business that I must discuss with you."
The Mayor, Derpy, Caramel, and Rapidfire entered the Mayor's private chamber. Rainbow Dash and Soarin were left alone.
"Oh, my love! Why are you so pale? How does the color in your cheeks fade so fast?"
"Most likely from fear or loss which the tears from my eyes will soon bring back, I assure you," Rainbow Dash replied.
