Sidestory: Jumpers take a Beach Break

by DiscordsAdvocate

Rating: teen
Tags: Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Romance, Trixie, Slice of Life, Human, Doctor Whooves, Main 6
Length: 5740

Based on Techogre's Memoirs of a Reality Jumper and KMCA's Jumper, the two dimensional hopping humans take a break at the beach with their Equestrian friends, hilarity ensues

Set in the Memverse in Techogre's Memoirs of a Reality Jumper (starring also is KMCA's Matthew, from Jumper). Alex goes with his Equestrian loved ones and friends to the beach, bringing along Matthew with him. Even on a relaxing coastline facing the ocean blue, does he and Matthew face new experiences, many of them comical, and learn more things about Equestria.

Warning! This chapter contains spoilers of possible future happenings in Techogre's Memverse and KMCA's Jumper.

Thank you Techogre and KMCA for giving me permission to write this.

Published 2013-06-19 03:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-06-19 03:50:02 UTC

Chapter 1

This story takes place in the future...
Includes Techogre’s and KMCA’s story

The train left the Ponyville station once all were aboard. It was going to be an eight hour trip, but for two days of rest and relaxation, it was going to be worth it, Alex thought. He hadn’t had a normal vacation in a long time. Oh sure, his existence here in Equestria has been a vacation compared to past sixty years. But to actually go someplace strictly for fun?

He took a look outside his window to see the theater building’s progress as Ponyville got further and further away, all while the promise of paradise within paradise grew. He grinned. The fact it now stood out in Ponyville was perfect. Many of the upper class ponies he had become friendly with in Canterlot had made special trips to Ponyville to see his vision coming to fruition. It was only natural that the high class attention would draw the curiosity of many reporters. Mayor Mare had said it was an unusual day that didn't include at least one inquiring reporter wanting to know all about this new theater and the unusual owner.

But that was then, and this was now. He got out of his bunk, stretched his slightly cramped muscles and cracked his back. Putting on some comfortable clothes, always sure to cover up the worst of the scars, he strode to the dining car. It was still before lunch, so he joined the rest his friends and family.

Beatrix "Trixie" Lulamoon was doing some magic tricks, of course. All her friends knew she was at her happiest entertaining others, and the happy squeals of the children around her was a sure sign of that. She had a small crowd of kids, adolescents, and a few adults gathered around her at the end of the dining car. She was wowing them with magic tricks of all kinds. We could hear delighted ooh’s and aah’s of the audience.

And Emerald was the newest recruit, seeing the dark green coated, black maned, and emerald-eyed pony sitting with Twilight; both chatting like two scientific prodigies. Both were talking over tea with a slightly annoyed Spike waiting with him, before he snuck off to another table. While Alex was glad Twi had a friend (maybe more) to relate her vast love for knowledge to, he wondered if poor Spike could adjust to their relationship.

Spike waved at the waitress, "Can we get something for them,” he flatly stated as he pointed at Emerald and Twilight, “with peanut butter? Extra sticky." The young dragon added to himself, "Maybe that will shut them up for a while."

Emerald absentmindedly waved his hoof at Twilight, “But without the standard resonance adjusted to the thematic isofield, you will overwork the starswirls. Do you have any idea how ill that will make a pony?”

Twilight gave Emerald an annoyed look. “Oh? Then explain tertiary thematic resonance field to counter the effect.” Shooting a challenging grin at him.

Alex chuckled while passing them and found the table where Dash and Scoots were sitting and enjoying their lunch. “Hello, my princesses.” He sat down, joining them. With both their mouths full they smiled. The picture was kinda funny to see. It was a testimonial that they were meant to be mother and daughter. He let them finish their bite before asking. “So how do ponies have fun at the beach?”

Normally Dash would give him an ‘isn’t it obvious’ look, but seeing Scoots also looking unsure, she kept herself in check. “Well, big guy, probably a lot like you guys do. Swimming, beach games, cookout, stuff like that.” She then looked in the direction of another human sitting with the others and whispered softly. “Is it safe bringing him with us?” She pointed a hoof at Matt, keeping some leg armor on.

The younger human sat cross-armed at another table.“What? I happen to be comfortable in this. Besides if by some chance I feel a jump coming on I’m not going to be away from my armor.” Matt explained to Rarity, who snorted in annoyance. Fluttershy’s ears twitched as she was about to say something, but stayed silent.

“Matthew, I only need you out of it for a minute. Then I can adjust your shorts pants. Trust me darling, you’ll look fabulous.” Rarity finished with a firm nod and tapped a hoof on the table.

Matthew was about to speak in protest until he felt a certain yellow pegasus softly nudge him on the arm, she gave him a look that was both sweet and gentle. Matthew stared into those eyes for a moment, a goofy half grin starting to form, before finally relenting. “Fine, but the boot stays on.”

Rarity threw her hooves up. “Goodness, finally! I don’t mean to be rude darling, but getting you humans out of your clothes is harder than designing a wedding dress!”

Alex returned his attention to the table. “Well, I have no doubt Matt is safe, but if he’s like me when I first got here, he’ll need help getting adjusted. There are things he learned in his experiences he’ll have to unlearn too if he’s to live here.” He considered for a moment.. “I mean, he wears the armor all the time, and if I understand him, that means he doesn’t feel safe, even here.” He mused for a moment and said softly. “I can relate.”

Dash smiled kindly at her husband. “Just like you keep that trusty knife of yours handy, huh?”

“Yep, though I have it for different reasons,” Alex gave a gallic shrug with those little hand and head gestures. “its just a safety measure for Mat.” He smiled. “But I don’t doubt he’s a good guy overall. Just a victim of circumstance, like me.”

“But me and my friends can finally be around him, dad?” Scoots asked.

“Yes, pumpkin. Just don’t get rowdy with him okay? That armor of his isn’t for show. Be polite and respectful and give him his space when he asks for it.” He instructed.

Scoots nodded without comment.

The train continued towards it’s destination into the evening...but on the beach of Hoofolulu, a certain light-aquamarine pony was already present, playing a titanium guitar. Acoustic guitars were not her favorite instrument, but even without hands...she sighed...she could play it well enough. Cubana music was easy for her, anyways. She reminded herself she wasn’t here just to make money...

...one day ago in Ponyville...

“So...this gig of yours, how much are you getting from it?” Bonbon asked while snuggling closer to Lyra.

Lyra nuzzled Bonbon, making sure to keep cool. “Quite a few bits, actually. And best of all, I get to stay three days. And yes,” She smiled. “I made sure they covered your room too.”

Bonbon yawned. “Good. But I can’t be there til the day after your first. And the best part is that our little vacation will be totally human free.”

“Yeah, just us. And don’t worry about me. I’ll have no problem keeping busy.” Lyra grinned, thinking back to her plan. It was all too easy. Another study to see the human behavior in beach settings. Her clients will pay big for this. But even better she managed to sneak into Alex’s house with a teleport spell and finally checked out what was on that amazing device of his. She refrained from the ‘social media.’ But finally used the ‘wikipedia’ of there’s. This time she had some reference. And the pictures she transposed from the display to paper will be easy for the tailor up there to work with. “Very busy.” She said below her breath, hoping this little side-business will give her some additional bits as well.

…back in present time...

The next morning, Alex was gently awoken by the braking of the train and the slightly cracking voice of Rainbow Dash. "Good morning, sleepyhead. Time to rise and shine and pop those clouds."

This was swiftly followed by the very excited voice of Scootaloo, "Morning dad! Miss Rarity and Sweetie Belle stopped by a little while ago said there was a spread waiting for us. Hurry, dad! I'm starving!"

Applejack had been awake for an hour, getting up before sunrise, her body not knowing it wasn’t on the fame. However, the warm form beside her reminded her she was on vacation. So, she spent the hour before the train stopped quietly holding the sleeping form of her handsome lover. At the sun rise, she quietly thanked Celestia for the joy he brought into her life.

As Beatrix awoke she was momentarily startled by the red foreleg over her barrel. She quickly relaxed and a happy smile grew. A deep baritone voice greeted her, "'Morning darlen'." Bea closed her eyes and reviled in the feeling of warmth, love, and stability he represented.

Pinkie looked down from her top bunk to her special friend, Whooves a.k.a. Time Turner. She was surprised to find herself looking directly into his eyes. "Pinkie, we're here! The Kalgoon Confederacy will be declaring war on the surface world unless we can convince them otherwise! We'll have a fortifying breakfast hopefully mercifully free of pears. What kind of civilization grows those things anyway. Once done, we'll be off!"

Fluttershy carefully crept up to Matthew. She could see the human was already awake. “Um...did you sleep well Matthew?” She asked.

Matthew yawned. “Yeah, I slept enough. You?” He turned to the yellow mare with a pleasant demeanor.

Fluttershy nodded as he got out of his bunk. “Um. So. Have you thought about what you would like to do for this vacation yet?”

Matthew thought for a moment. “Play it by ear.” He reached softly rubbed Fluttershy’s left ear, who blushed softly and giggled.

Twilight and Emerald were already up and had their saddlebags on before heading out. Twilight brought out her checklist and began reviewing her plans for the vacation. Spike and Sapphire rode on their respective parents’ backs. “Now Sapphire, remember the water is very salty. So keep your collar to maintain your buoyancy.”

Spike blinked. “What is wrong with Sapphire and water, Emerald?”

“Um...well me and Sapphire have problems with swimming. Less buoyancy in salt water. We can drown easily. Its a uh...rare condition for ponies. We both have to wear enchanted collars to swim. Because Celestia be damned if I don’t get to swim with my friends!” He grinned.

Twilight looked at Emerald with an inquisitive expression, but accepted that explanation for now. ‘Salt water has more buoyancy than freshwater. He would know that.' she thought to herself.

Rarity, with a radiant smile, followed by her little sister, gathered her dear friends on the platform. "I've had the porters take your things to your rooms, now if you'll please join me. I have arranged for a lovely breakfast buffet. And I have a special treat for my dear human friends. I've arranged for a griffin chef to prepare some dishes I'm sure you will appreciate.”

Alex and Matthew liked the sound of that. Upon exiting, the two humans noticed the differences of ponies, as their lighter fur made them more accustomed to sunlight, plus they spoke Cubana-slang English. Still, they also showed similarities to Hawaiian customs and whatnot. Rarity earlier explained it all to everypony about the coastline pony-culture, given her father owned the bungalows they were staying in (for free, on top of that).

Their breakfast was under a large pavilion as everypony dug in. Alex was delighted to see his friends and family were no longer looking away while he ate the meat served to him. It seems they were getting more and more used to these differences. Matt seemed less conscientious about it and simply enjoyed the food. The humans' ears picked up the voices of the CMC as they were already making plans for cutiemarks with a long list. After listening for a minute, Alex pulled Dash, Rarity, and Applejack aside.

Alex leaned in and whispered into her ear. "They're planning surfing, treasure hunting, beach-fishing, sandcastle making, shell collecting, bongos, hula dancing, reggae, sand painting..."

"Shark wrestling." Matt added.

Applejack's eyes went wide. "Oh no ya'll don't!" The mare said trotting over to the CMC with Rarity and Dash in tow.

"You cross that off this instant!" Rarity followed pointing at the life-endangering item on their list.

"But sis!" Both Sweetie Bell and Applebloom said in unison.

Scootaloo frowned. "Mom?" She asked hopefully.

Rainbow Dash replied sternly. "The answer is no, Scoots. No messing with sharks, period. Your dad also says so."

The CMC sighed in defeat, and crossed it off. "Lets replace it with whale-calling." Sweetie Bell followed.

The sun was shining and the sand was warm beneath the feet and hooves of the newcomers. Some shared a room. The fillies got their own room in the extra-large bungalow down the hall from Rarity, Alex & Dash’s, AJ & Elusive’s, Big Mac’s, and Trixie’s rooms. Big Mac got the room closest to Trixie’s. Pinkie & Whooves, Twilight, Emerald, Fluttershy, and Matt had another.

“Where are the books?!?” Twilight asked exited her room, flabbergasted. “I only brought enough for a day!”

Rarity rolled her eyes as she trotted outside. “Darling, we are here to have fun outdoors, not spending hours glued to literature.”

Twilight sighed, though Emerald nudged her with a ‘psst,’ showing her a stash of books he brought with him from his saddlebags. Twilight smiled brightly and gave an appreciative nuzzle to the now-blushing colt.

The rest made plans to drag those two from their books for the next two days.

Alex unpacked his stuff and undressed to get in his short-sleeved, short legged surfing suit. He personally never surfed, but he asked Elusive to commission this for him to cover up his back scars as well as for needing swim trunks. May as well make it a single suit. It was made of the same material wetsuits were made of. After zipping up, he jumped, feeling the soft brushing across his posterior. “Yaow!” He turned and smirked at the culprit. “Caught me off guard there.” He told his wife.

Rainbow Dash chuckled watching him get dressed. “Promise me something?” She asked as she got up on the bed, sitting upward to meet him face-to-face.

“Anything, angel.” He kissed her nose.

“Rarity gave us use of a private lagoon tonight. She says don’t worry about the temperature, it’s special and you’ll see why.” Dash grinned. “I bet that would be pretty comfortable for you...” She grinned running a hoof down to his suit, then stopping just above his groin. “...in your birthday suit.” She winked.

Alex could already see where this was going. “Skinny dipping?”

Dash gave a sultry grin. “Is that what the kids are calling it these days.” She pecked him on the cheek. “Yep, and we’ll have it all to ourselves tonight.” She said in a sultry whisper, audible for only him to hear.

Alex flushed and put his arms around his wife. “As long as we can get someone to babysit Scoots tonight.”

Dash nodded. “Trixie and Big Mac will babysit the kids. But only if they get to use the lagoon tomorrow.” She giggled.

“Mom! Dad! Can we pleeeeeease go to the beach now?” Asked an annoyed Scootaloo.

The little filly’s parents burst out in laughter. “Interrupting our mushy moment, eh squirt?” Dash grinned and readied herself to chase her adopted daughter. “I’m gonna getcha for that.”

Scootaloo squeaked and merrily galloped outside with Dash in tow. Alex got his sandals on and jogged out to meet them outside.

The beach was beautiful. It had been a while since Alex had experienced this. It reminded him about this family. A bittersweet hint of pain hit him thinking about that. A vision in his mind of his kids running down the sand with his soon-to-be ex wife walking with him...and then it was gone as he noticed Scoots joining her friends and Dash already meeting the others. Well, that wasn’t so bad, he thought. It didn’t hurt as much. He sighed and noticed Matt standing in his shorts with the armor over his left leg. Oy.

As he approached everypony, he was suddenly approached by what he had mistaken for a fellow human, but when the sun cleared from his eyes, he noticed obviously it wasn’t. Rather, it was a minotaur. He had seen them in other realities before, but none as humanoid as this! His face was definitely bull-like but a lot more expressive. The horns were a dead giveaway. The male approached him with a speedo on and a pair of exercise bracers as his hooves dug sizable potholes in the dirt.

“You there!” He said in a bellowing, burly, and slightly raspy voice. “So the rumors of a Kong here are true!”

Alex looked from left to right, then pointed to himself. “Me?”

“Yeah, I thought so!” The minotaur nodded folding his arms over his chest. “Definitely those guys. Only you’re shaven...have no tail...and come to think of it your face looks like it was run over by a stampeding Buffalo herd.”

Is there an insult so funny it just makes insulted laugh? Cause this was a good one. Alex snickered before breaking out into a full belly laugh. And before he knew it, the big bull-man laughed with him.

“Good, a guy who can take a little ribbing. I don’t know what you are, to be honest, but you seem alright. You can call me Iron Will!” He took his hand and shook it.

Now, Alex was aware the creatures of this dimension were significantly stronger than him, but dear Celestia in heaven, this came close to crushing his hand. “Woah! Iron! Easy there!” He withdrew his hand.

Matt noticed what had transpired and ran up. “What happened?” He asked as he approached the two.

“Another?!?” Iron Will looked at both humans.

“Yeah,” Alex cradled his hand as it slowly recovered from the near-crushing. “Alex Roberts, human race. Great senses, tool users, apex predators, but couldn’t match a Unicorn in strength and speed without effort.”

Iron Will looked at the two like a deer in the headlights. “WHAT?!?”

Matt looked at Alex. “Do you just go telling everyone your weaknesses here?”

Alex looked back. “Well yeah. Its the only way I can let anybody know to pull their punches with me. Else I’d break.”

Matt rolled his eyes. “Armor dude. Even the odds.” He smiled smugly and tapped his lightly protected leg.

“Hold on there!” Iron Will interjected and brought the two humans to his attention. “Let me look at those arms!” He compared his to the humans. Iron Will was built more than both humans put together. “The proportions don’t make sense!”

“Well we are from...far away. You know, differences and all that jazz.” Alex didn’t go as far as to say his origins, that is a whole bigger pill to swallow.

Iron Will shook his head. “And it just so happens I can make it right!” He said with a confident grin.

Both Matt and Alex stared at the bipedal bull.”...what?”

“You lucky gentlebulls have the fortune of getting a free sample of Iron Will’s patented exercise program! Guaranteed to work your flabby limbs into powerhouses of pure potency!”

Alert! Alert! Matt and Alex’s mental alarms sounded.

“Well, thanks, but no thanks.” Alex tried to save them.

“Yyyyyeah, we’re here with friends so...” Matt added.

“And you don’t want to SHAME your friends, do you?” Iron Will began his hard sell, leaning in.

Stay cool, Matt. You promised to keep this civil. “Not interested, buddy.” Matt replied sternly.

Alex put his hands up. “Hang on Matt. Look I can see you’re trying to sell something here. What if we...demo’d your program for a few minutes so you can attract more customers?”

Matt looked at Alex with an eye twitch. “You have to go around doing favors for everyone?”

Alex replied with a twinkle in his eye. “Make allies wherever you can, Matt.”

“Allies is one thing, setting yourself up for injury, I try to avoid that as much as possible.” Matt replied.

“You see, hamon? This guy knows what he’s talking about!” The minotaur patted Alex on the back, nearly knocking him down. “Whoops. Buddy, you should really consider the long-term program.”

Matt and Alex winced at the mispronunciation, but both silently agreed to not correct him. He was, after all, bigger than both of them combined.

Matt wondered how he got convinced to doing this. They were at the equivalent of the ‘muscle beach’ section. A fence surrounding a series of exercise equipment. Pretty much where stallions and mares of physical perfection were exercising. And, as expected, the rest of the group trotted in to witness the spectacle.

“This is your fault, Al.” Matt grumbled.

Alex chuckled nervously as Iron Will began his speech. “Greetings everypony! Your favorite motivational speaker, good health-instructor, and innovative extraordinaire, is about to demonstrate the best and and awesome exercise program for hurmons! Now you have seen the results of my exercise program with the powerful and lovely SNOWFLAKE!”

“YEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAH!” Shouted the white monster of a muscled pony.

“What are you doing here?” Alex asked the pegasus.

Snowflake winked. “Just supporting my sweetheart.” He said in a gentle tone.

“You mean you and Iron Will are...intimate?” Alex asked.

Snowflake grinned and nodded “Don’t worry, this exercise won’t mess you up. I’ll make sure of it.”

Alex was thankful for that. Though he could see Dash and Scoots cheering him on, with Dash looking a bit mockingly in his direction. Oh yeah, she was enjoying this spectacle.

“It all involves a simple bail flex! Pump those arms straight and stern. Feel those cords rip and burn!” Iron Will instructed as Alex and a very grudging Matt demonstrated the equivalent of a bow-flex that used hay bales for counterweights.

“This is not how I intended to spend my vacation!” Matt growled. Then saw Fluttershy look at him with a smile, Matt sighed.

“Look at it this way.” Alex huffed. “You get a good warm-up from it.”

“And now we begin increasing the weight gradually while the two think thoughts of just how light the weights are!” The minotaur explained.

“Huh?!” The two humans replied.

Emerald raised an eyebrow. “That is absurd. Psychological dissonance doesn’t make you stronger.”

Twilight nodded. “Agreed. But to put these two on the spotlight, they’ll get humiliated otherwise.”

Emerald looked at Twilight with an idea. “Hm...how much do you know about human adrenal glands?”

Twilight grinned. “I read about them. I say a four blanera activation and directed towards the arms, diaphragm, heart, and pain receptors.”

Emerald nodded and the two pointed their horns at the struggling humans.

“Thats right, humans. You may be weaker than Unicorns, but with the power of your minds, you can overcome any trial! Just think, lighter! LIGHTER! Your arms are stronger! STRONGER!” Iron Will coached the two. Matt was doing better than Alex. Sadly, Alex could only think how foolish this idea was, but was glad Snowflake would intervene in case things got worse. Still, with Dash and Scoots watching, he’d at least give them a funny story to tell when they got back.

“More bales!”

Crap...anytime now Snowflake!

Things seemed hopeless as Alex and Matt were about to lose grip (or their arms), with Snowflake about to jump in to stop the shenanigans. But then all the sudden the two could feel a gradual surge in ease of pulling those bales up. Though their vision narrowed and their hearing dulled, they could feel their hearts pumping and their breathing speed increased.

There was a moment of panic before the two noticed they had managed to lift five bales for each arm!

“You see!? Its mind over body!! Even a hummer can do it!!” Iron Will egged his test subjects on. “More-”

Finally, Snowflake intervened before Iron would get carried away. “AWRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!” The muscle-bound pony then nudged Iron Will, which was the cue for the demonstration to end.

“Err...right! So mares and gentlecolts, feel free to pick up my materials at that table over there!” Iron Will led what crowd would follow him.

Finally, the two humans lowered the bales and found their bodies calming down. Shaking, but calming. They felt Snowflake’s wings help keep them up as they walked out of the outdoor gym.

“There was no way,” Matt huffed. “we could do all that at will.”

Alex huffed regaining his breath and feeling homeostasis return him to normal breathing and heart rate. “Agreed. I felt something influencing us.” He then looked to Twilight and Emerald, both waving innocently. “And those somethings have horns.”

“Magic?” Matt asked.

“Eeyyup.” Alex replied.

With the help of their friends, the two finally flopped down at the beach and rested their weary bodies under a large parasol. Flutters was already fanning Matt with one wing and serving him juice. Dash did the same, albeit praising Alex. “Dude, how long have you been holding back on me, huh?!?” Dash exclaimed rubbing his shoulders. “If I knew you could do that, I mean that was cool!”

“Yyyyyeah, Dash, I think our two present scientists may have given us some help.” He smirked at Twilight and Emerald.

Twilight and Emerald both looked innocently momentarily before mutually grinning. “Well, it didn’t seem fair you were put in that position and all, and Iron Will would have been devastated had you guys got hurt. And besides, that adrenaline of yours, I wanted to see it in action.” Twilight replied with proud grin.

“Just don’t do that again without warning us, okay?” Matt put it bluntly. “Adrenaline is great stuff. It can make a human as strong as an earthpony, fast as a pegasus, nerve-dead; but goddamn does it do hell on our bodies.”

Emerald smiled confidently. “Being the leading expert on humans, I can assure you I knew what I was doing.” Upon receiving a hoof tap on a foreleg, he glanced at Twilight, already giving him a stern look. “But of course, I’ll get your permission next time.” He humbly followed.

“Oh dear. You mean it can hurt you?” Flutters asked.

“Let me put it to you this way. On our world, there is a true-story of a middle-aged woman about a fourth as strong as me, who lifted a two ton machine that fell on her son so he could get out from under it. And he did. But she had to be hospitalized for three days after.” Alex informed them. That elicited surprised and concerned looks from everypony.

“You okay big guy?” Dash moved closer, Flutters followed suit with Matt, who was still shaking, even tearing up in his post-adrenaline stupor. “We don’t have to take you to the infirmary again, do we?”

“Naw, that wasn’t bad.” Alex rubbed Dash’s mane playfully. “And by the way, Emerald.” Alex changed the subject. “Iron said he thought we were ‘kong.’ Care to elaborate?”

“Kong? The Wukong? Well, the minotaur tribes aren’t far away from the far west past the Griffon Kingdoms so I guess he would know of them.” Emerald surmised.

“Who are they?” Matt asked.

“Monkeys. As big as you. My kin know of them, but not much else.” Emerald replied.

Alex grew suddenly very interested in what Emerald had just said. “Really. Where did you say your family are from?”

“Near the wasteland.” Emerald replied, cocking his head.

“Buuuut that’s nowhere near the Minotaur or Griffin tribes.” Alex added.

Emerald cleared his throat. “We should focus on your possible relatives.”

“Riiiight, but lets change the old subject, shall we?” Alex offered.

“How about Snowflake? I remember that guy in one episode. Dude was huge.” Matt said.

Alex shrugged, “Yeah, didn’t know Snowflake was gay. Not that it matters, just one more data point.”

Dash looked at both humans quizzically. “Um, guys? Snowflake is a mare.”

Alex was sure both Matt and himself were giving her the same deer-in-the-headlights look. “Seriously? Does she, take steroids or something?”

More quizzical looks. “What’s a steroid?” The rainbow maned pegasus asked.

Matt chuckled. “Now I know what he...she meant saying ‘Iron Will makes me feel like a mare.’” And a mutual chuckle was shared. The two pegasi and Unicorn could only shrug to each other and walked out of earshot to check on the fillies.

“You know, Matt. I’m the first to tell you not to make assumptions.” Alex chuckled and continued, “Wow, I wouldn’t have spotted that in a million years.”

“So, is Dash...?” Matt asked, hesitating.

“Yes, she’s aggressively female. Very much so. And so is Fluttershy. Caught a glimpse by accident.” Alex answered.

“Whoa, seriously. You looked at her dondle?” Matt asked.

“I’m not sure what that word means, but, yes. I couldn’t look in her general direction for two days I was so embarrassed. So does this mean....” Alex inferred.

“Yup, you made a social screw-up before I did. You owe me twenty bits.” Matt shot an evil grin.

“Here.” He pulled out a small coin purse and counted out five coins, ginning good naturedly at his loss. “Four, eight, twelve, sixteen, twenty.”

Matt took his money and put it in his satchel. He then stood up and went to where the rest of the company were, but not far enough out of earshot.

Alex noticed Emerald looking at him. His eyes held the fear of a fugitive about to be caught. Alex knew the expression far too well. Emerald’s cultured tones were jarringly unlike his fearful expression. “You know, you could have outed me back there. In front of everyone. In front of her.” His expression became resigned, “What do you want from me?”

“Nothing.” Alex gave him a look of sympathy. “Just your word you’re on our side, or at least neutral and you’ll stay out of our way.” Emerald’s fear changed to confusion. “It was your coat. It’s is a little off at the neckline and where you’re hiding your wings.” The human pointed out, “No pony would ever see it, not even a Princess.”

“But, how...” Emerald was wide eyed. “No pony could see through a Changeling’s disguise,” he accidentally muttered as he swallowed in fear.

“I’m not a pony, am I?” Alex replied and winked.

After a few heartbeats, “How long?” Emerald’s voice was starting to shake.

“I noticed there was something off when I first meet you at the Library. Like the lines didn’t quite fit. But I had no reason to think ill of you. You’re treating Twilight with a lot of respect. You make her happy, you know. You love your daughter, who, I might add, is cute as a button. I wasn’t sure until now. Anyway, you’ve got nothing to fear from me, one outsider to another.” Alex patted him on his shoulder...or where it would be. Taking note of the strange feeling of a magical warmth touching his hand. He deduced it was whatever power allowed him to disguise himself.

Emerald stared at Alex for a moment before looking away. “Bugger this sand in my eyes.” He sniffed and wiped a hoof across them. “And be careful. The protection on yours and Matt’s D.N.A. is working for the ambient magic and lite spells, like the one we cast on you both, but Changeling magic uses different particles, and the effects are unknown. That could have taken seconds, minutes, hours, or even days off your life.” he scolded, then his expression changed to warm, but humbled. “But thank you, Alex.” He bowed his head humbly...then suddenly his true demeanor kicked in. “Wait...cute as a button? I’ll assume that’s a human term. Positive, based on your tone and facial expression. However, I doubt you would find her as cute in her natural form.”

“Don’t bet on it. Her illusion isn’t as good as yours. I still think she’s a lovely child. And yes, she is quite cute.” Alex replied. “And for the record, a few minutes to comfort a friend is a small price to pay.”

Emerald paused, then lightly smiled. He turned his head and noticed Matt walking back in their direction. “Sorry for keeping everyone. I see Mr. Matthew has stopped shaking. Anything else I can do for you?”

Matt paused for a moment, eying the Changeling like a subtle spider. “Nothing. Excuse me Alex, going to get the rest of my armor.” Matt said stretching.

“...what?” Emerald asked.

Alex looked at Matt. “You promised, Matt.”

“The bodysuit does a good job keeping out magic rads but it’s no fun swimming in the ocean if you can barely feel it...that and it’s very buoyant. If I’m just lounging around I’d like to throw on the plates to compensate for someone dumping magic into my body.” Matt gave Emerald an accusing glance before slipping a smile in to show there were no hard feelings.

Alex stood as well. “Matt, Matt, Matt.” He sighed.

“What, what, what?” Matthew gave Alex a bemused look.

“The rest of your armor is back at Fluttershy’s.” Alex turned and walked towards where the others were, with Emerald in tow.

“...WHAT?!” Matt gritted his teeth and followed, his hands clenched in tight fists. “But I packed it!”

“Flutters thought you packed it by mistake. So she packed you an extra case of clothes and put your armor back in her basement. Don’t worry, Angel is there to guard it.” Alex stated casually, but Matt knew full well he was hiding a smug-grin.

Matt stopped and said nothing, before he followed again, trying hard to keep his cool. Three days. That is it. I can go three days. I am not jumping for a long time, not even by accident. Right? Just think about the vacation...and that Changeling who could turn on us any second, Matt thought to himself.

Alex could see everypony was setting up. Well, first hour of the vacation, he thought; we experienced muscle beach, impressed some onlookers, and demonstrated the amazing power of adrenaline to ponykind. What next?

The old human suddenly experienced the impact of an orange blur right in the chest. His wind and panic were taken away simultaneously as he realized the source of the impact. Pinning him down was his beloved daughter, wings flapping in excitement, and face the very definition of a happy and excited child.

“ThatWasSoAwesomeDadIDidin'tKnowYouCouldDoThatI'mGonnaTellAllMyFriendsAboutHowCoolYouWere!CanYouDoItAgainPleasePleasePleaseAndCanIGetIceCream?” She finally stopped for breath. Alex simply looked up at the sky and sighed happily.