Dimension Travelers X: The Pony Gambit

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David’s POV

If anything were ‘standard’ in Ponyville, I might have applied the term to that particular day. But I knew better, so I didn’t. Sure enough, it was slightly past noon when things took a turn for the stupid.

Somehow, Trixie, Twilight, Spike, and I all ended up alone in the town square outside of Sugar Cube Corner. Spike was worried about zombies. I would’ve smelt their rotting flesh had there been any.

“Pssst, guys, come here! Hurry! Before she gets you!” Pinkie Pie whisper-called from Sugar Cube Corner and we decided to enter in hopes of finding out what the heck was going on. Once inside, we discovered that all of the six were there.

“What are you all doing, hiding in the dark?” Twilight asked

“We’re hidin’ from her!” Applejack replied and pointed out the window. We looked and it turned out to be a zebra wearing a cloak digging in the dirt.

“Didja’ see her? Didja’ see…Zecora?” A young Earth pony filly asked

“Apple Bloom! I told ya to never say that name!” Applejack quickly rebuked and given the apple-themed name, I guessed that Apple Bloom was Applejack’s little sister.

“Well, I saw her glance this way,” Twilight said

“Glanced evilly!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed

“Oh yes, that glance was so evil Celestia herself quakes in fear of it,” Trixie quipped sarcastically

“Anyway, the bunch of you just flipped out for no good reason,” Twilight commented

“No good reason?! Ya call protectin’ your kin ‘no good reason’?!” Applejack protested, “Why, as soon as my sister saw Zecora ridin’ into town, she started shakin’ in her little horseshoes!”

“Did not!” Apple Bloom denied while being shook by her older sister.

“So I swept her up and brought her here,” Applejack said, completely ignoring her Apple Bloom.

“I walked here myself,” Apple Bloom corrected, but all the others were too wrapped up in being afraid of Zecora to pay her any mind. Twilight, Trixie, and I all shared a look. Twilight looked back out the window, Zecora took her hood down, and the others gasped.

“Just look at those stripes; so garish!” Rarity complained

“She’s a zebra,” Twilight pointed out

“A what?” the other five asked

“A zebra. And her stripes aren’t a fashion choice, they’re what she was born with,” Twilight explained and Rarity looked like she was going to be sick right before she fainted in a ridiculously lady-like manner.

“Born where? I’ve never seen a pony like that in these parts; ‘cept her!” Applejack remarked

“Well she’s probably not from here and she’s not a pony. My book says that zebras come from a far away land, but I’ve never seen her in Ponyville,” Twilight remarked, “Where does she live?”

“That’s just it; she lives in…The Everfree Forest!” Applejack exclaimed and then Spike caused a bunch of pans to crash down.

“Spike!” Twilight shouted

“Sorry,” Spike apologized

“The Everfree Forest just ain’t natural! The plants grow…” Applejack started

“And the animals care for themselves…” Fluttershy put in

“And the clouds move…” Rainbow Dash added

“All on their own!” The three mares chorused and I facepalmed.

“In 99% of the worlds I’ve ever been on, that’s usually how it works,” I commented offhandedly and the three boggled at me. I resisted the urge to do another facepalm, but only just. It was only made harder by Rarity fainting again.

“And that wicked enchantress Zecora lives there doing her evil, uh, stuff! She’s so evil; I even wrote a song about her!

“She’s an evil enchantress! She does evil dances and if you look deep in her eyes; she’ll put you in trances! Then what will she do? She’ll mix up an evil brew and she’ll gobble you up in a big tasty stew so WATCH OUT!” Pinkie sang

“The Great and Powerful Trixie is insulted by this mockery of a performance,” Trixie muttered to me and I couldn’t hold in a chuckle. Apple Bloom and Twilight were both similarly unimpressed by Pinkie’s chant/song/thing.

“It’s all just a lot of gossip and rumors. Now tell me, what exactly have you seen Zecora do?” Twilight asked

“Well, every so often she comes into Ponyville,” Rainbow Dash offered

“And then she lurks by the stalls!” Rarity added

“And then she digs at the ground,” Fluttershy put in and all the while Twilight was making overly dramatic comments

“OK, I’m sorry, but how is this bad? Maybe she just comes to town to visit?” Twilight suggested

“Yeah! Maybe she’s just wants to be neighborly!” Apple Bloom remarked

“Well, if she’s hanging around the stalls, then she’s probably trying to do some shopping,” I commented

“Yeah! Everypony needs to shop! You wanna know what I think?-” Apple Bloom would have continued, but she was cut off by Applejack.

“What about digging at the ground?” Rainbow Dash asked, “You’ve gotta admit, that’s weird!”

“Like Ponyville isn’t filled with…eccentric…ponies,” Trixie remarked, “Zecora has every right to prod at the ground to her heart’s content. Just like Pinkie Pie’s free to throw parties for any reason she can conceive or Fluttershy’s free to do goat impressions when she’s scared or any other odd habit any other pony has.”

“If anypony were actually brave enough to go ask, they’d find out the truth!” Twilight agreed

“I’ll go ask. And when I get back, remind me to introduce you all to something called ‘mob psychology’ and also, jumping to conclusions with half-baked ideas,” I commented and went to go to the door, but found my path blocked by five ponies.

“You can’t go out there, it’s too dangerous!” Applejack cried…this might take awhile.
Apple Bloom’s POV

I decided I would be brave, so I snuck out the back door and when to talk to Zecora. I followed her all the way to the Everfree Forest. Unfortunately, I didn’t get far before my big sister and her friends caught up with me.

“Beware! Beware, you pony folk! Those leaves of blue are not a joke!” Zecora suddenly shouted and then walked into the mist. Then Applejack scooped me up.

“You keep your creepy mumbo-jumbo to yourself, ya hear?!” Applejack shouted

“Beware! Beware!” Zecora shouted again and vanished. The others started goin’ on about how Zecora was evil and might have put a curse on me.

“You guys, there’s no such things as curses!” Twilight declared

“Well that’s interesting to hear, coming from Ms. Magic-pants herself!” Rainbow Dash quipped

“Curses are artificial magic, fake. Made with potions, smoke, and mirrors meant to scare. But curses have no real power, they’re just an old pony tale,” Twilight remarked.

“Just you wait Twilight, you’re gonna learn that some pony tales really are true,” Applejack remarked before walkin’ off.

David’s POV

Given Twilight’s comments back in Everfree, I was really looking forward to next week’s lessons on all the different types of magic I’ve encountered. From the psionic magic of the Carrionites to the tricks I picked up at Hogwarts and all the curses they contain in their arsenal. But more pressing matters arose.

The next day, I was about to eat breakfast when Trixie showed up and without a word of explanation, dragged me to Twilight’s library. Once there, I found that all of the six plus Trixie were suffering from something. Twilight’s horn had gone all wobbly, Pinkie’s tongue had swelled up, Rarity’s coat and mane had become very large dreadlocks, Applejack had shrunk, Rainbow Dash was crashing into everything, Trixie’s Cutie Mark had vanished, and Fluttershy’s voice had become a very masculine bass.

All the ponies seemed sure that Zecora had something to do with this, except Trixie.

“She did warn us about the blue plants, didn’t she? It’s our own fault we didn’t listen,” She remarked, “Besides, David wasn’t affected, so it only makes sense that it was that plant and not something of magical origin.” It did make sense, but the others were too wrapped up in their witch hunt to notice. I just hope I can derail this fiasco before it gets worse.

Apple Bloom’s POV

While the others were arguing, I decided to go find Zecora to try and fix everything. It was my fault, after all. I didn’t get far into the Everfree though.

“Stop right there!” I heard, but my ‘big’ sister was too small to stop me, so I placed her on a nearby branch and continued on my way. The last I heard was Applejack threatening to tell Big Macintosh on me.

David’s POV

Since I couldn’t stop the train wreck, I decided to at least make sure they didn’t get themselves killed in the Everfree Forest. Thankfully, the walk to Zecora’s place was uneventful. When we got there, we saw Zecora cooking up something. Pinkie was unable to sing her song, but she begged Fluttershy and the puppy-dog eyes won out.

“She’s an evil enchantress and she does evil dances and if you look deep in her eyes; she’ll put you in trances. Then what will she do? She’ll mix up an evil brew and she’ll gobble you up in a big tasty stew so watch out!”

Anyway, after the rendition of Pinkie’s song, Twilight went over to the stupid side. Just because Zecora was cooking, something while muttering to herself and had some masks hanging around. Because Heaven knows that, nothing says ‘evil’, quite like a person’s décor and cooking habits. Then Zecora took a lick of the brew.

“The perfect temperature for ponies, I presume. Now, where is that little Apple Bloom?” Zecora wondered and Twilight seemed to think this meant that Zecora was going to eat Apple Bloom. Of course, she couldn’t be commenting that the brew was the perfect temperature for serving; no, it must mean that Zecora was planning to put in Apple Bloom.

OK, I’ll admit that it would seem slightly suspicious under the right circumstances, but given that zebras are herbivores, one would think it was pretty obvious that Zecora wasn’t planning on eating Apple Bloom. Before I could point this out, Rainbow Dash crashed into Zecora’s house and completely wrecked the place before knocking over the brew.

“So Trixie, why aren’t you jumping on the bandwagon?” I asked while the others got chewed out by Zecora.

“I’ve met a few zebras in my travels. One taught me the finer points of fireworks,” Trixie explained and that when Apple Bloom showed up. Zecora and Apple Bloom then explained about the Poison Joke and what it does and reminded the others that Zecora had warned them. Zecora also showed Twilight a book, which held the cure: one she had rejected from Spike because of its title.

“Well if that isn’t a ‘don’t judge a book by its cover’ lesson, I don’t know what is,” I remarked

Well, Zecora agreed to mix up the remedy, but to do so; she needed an herb from Ponyville. However, whenever she went into Ponyville, all the shops were ‘mysteriously’ closed. So we all went into town together; with sadly predictable results. Thankfully, we managed to talk some sense into everypony. After that, everyone got cured. Although, I had to cast quietus on Pinkie because of how much and how loudly she was yammering about how great it was to be able to talk again. Well, it could’ve been worse. Also, that Poison Joke is gonna make excellent prank fodder!

Author's Note

I am indeed alive. I just can't figure out how to transition from where I currently am to the endgame in my other story. So I came back to this. Hopefully, having a proper job now will dispel the boredom induced apathy I seem to have fallen into.