The Travelling Argument

"No really! I'm from Canterlot! Perhaps you've heard of me!" said Sky.

"Yes, in the criminal underworld as a thief," said Swift. "I may not have been the one who was paid for it, but I know of the bounty on your head. I will not act on it against my better judgement, and I would recommend not attempting your deceit any further."

"Oh... you heard about that, huh? It's all taken out of context! Conspiracy! Really big cases of slander! I wouldn't steal... I just... there were some accidents," explained Sky.

"Who am I to believe? A single mare proclaiming her innocence, or an entire underbelly that has nothing but praise for the one who stole the crown jewels from right under Shining Armor's muzzle?" asked Swift with a roll of her eyes.

"They started it... being all shiny and stuff. Wasn't my fault, it was an accident... THEY FELL INTO MY HOOVES, OKAY? DON'T LISTEN TO THE GUARDS!"

"You misunderstand. I am actually honored to be talking to a thief such as yourself, as my skills in the art of recovery could not hope to match yours. And listen to the guards? Ha, the only things they're good for are information and practice!"

Sky let her guard down. "Oh... well... it was a pretty cool heist... I mean, you know, it took me weeks to plan everything, but it went pretty well, huh?"

Swift chuckled. "Indeed. I'd say you could steal them right of the princess' heads and they wouldn't know until bedtime."

"Well, that's sort of what happened. Turns out those big wings don't give you good peripherals." Sky began inching slowly towards Swift's saddlebag on the ground a few feet from Swift's location.

'I'm sure that some griffins would say the same... if they were still alive to do so."

"I don't kill ponies or griffins, personally," said Sky with a skeptical look towards Swift, but still inched closer to her bags. "Besides, I liked that weird face Princess Cadance made when she saw her jewelry box was missing!"

"Oh, I'm sure it was hilarious. And if you have a moral compass that I lack, then the world is slightly better for it."

Sky stopped midway looking through Swift's saddlebag. "A moral what?"

"A moral compass. While you and I both make our livings, you would be seen as the better mare. You have not taken a life," explained Swift. She finally noticed her going through her bags. "And get out of my bags before I suffocate you with them."

"I don't have a clue what you're talking about! I was just checking to see if everything was there!" defended Sky.

"And how would you know if anything was missing?" asked Swift.

Sky swiped a book out of Swift's bag as quickly as she could. "Trust me, I'm a professional! See, is anything missing?" She tossed Swift her bag and began looking through her diary while she wasn't looking.

Swift quickly took out a throwing knife and threw it at Sky, it whizzing past her muzzle and embedding itself in a nearby tree.

"A professional in getting yourself into trouble. If you so much as look at that book again, I will have your head. Am I understood?" asked Swift.

Sky jolted backwards and stared at the knife. "Whoa! Point made... I was just looking though, no harm in that, right?"

"There is when it is the private belongings of an assassin. Now I will count to three, and all of my possessions are to be returned to those saddlebags. Your time starts now: One."

"Can we talk about this?" asked Sky sheepishly.

Swift grunted. "No. Two."

"It was only a little peek, honest!"

"I don't care. Three."

Sky bolted out of position and galloped for her life. "Aaaand off I go!"

Swift smirked as she collected her scattered belongings. "You would think she knows not to mess with the bigger fish," she said to herself.

Sky quickly came back with a giggle. "You'd think that YOU'D know to check your saddlebags before thinking you're safe!"

Swift stared coldly at Sky. "I expect those who would try to be dead before they got near them. Do not make me share that fate with you."

"So, hypothetically, if you checked your saddlebag right now and saw that there might be a few bits mysteriously missing... and I stress that this is hypothetical... what would happen?" asked Sky.

"The bottom part of your hooves would go first, followed by your left eye and then your right. Your tongue would be next, and your nasal area soon afterwards," answered Swift.

"But not my ears, right?" Sky was hopeful at best.

"No, your ears would go too," continued Swift.

"Uh huh... then I'd recommend, erm... not looking in your saddle bag... please and thank you."

"Then I suggest you return the items before I follow through with what I have stated," demanded Swift. "Three."

"Could you turn around and look over there while I HYPOTHETICALLY put the hypothetical coins back in the hypothetical bag?" asked Sky as nicely as she could.

"No, I'd prefer to see the hypothetical thievery personally," answered Swift. "Two."

"What's to see? It's all hypothetical, right?"

"You wouldn't have any problem demonstrating this hypothetical situation to me, would you?"

"I can do, but you have to turn around so I don't get hypothetically killed."

Swift stared at her and thought for a few eternal seconds. She gave up with a sigh. "Fine. I will go to gather food. After that, I suggest we make our way back to civilization, re-equip and re-supply. We can plan our next move from there." She turned her back and began walking off.

"Yes! I got away with it!" said Sky. She quickly found Swift giving her another cold glare. "I mean, yeah, sure thing!"

"And my possessions will be returned by the time I get back. Otherwise..." Swift extended the blade in her gauntlet and holds it in a threatening position at Sky.

"Ten second head start. Got it."

Swift trotted off, sharpening her blade along the way in preparation for food gathering.

Sky pulled out the diary again and began reading. "Hehe, now let's find out who she's got a crush on..." She only made past a few words when a throwing knife embedded itself in the page.

"Well fine! It's Shining Armor, isn't it?" asked Sky.

Another knife hit the book with a piece of paper attached with a big 'NO' inscribed on it.  Sky chuckled. "Is it me? It's me, isn't it?"

A third knife hit the book with another piece of paper, it wrote 'You wish your tiny little flank off. The next one goes through the patch of air you call a brain.'

"I'm going to take that as a yes!" said Sky as she ducked behind a tree, snickering like a school filly.

Swift sighed. "Every second of your existence gives me another reason to kill you," she dashed to Sky's position and stood over her. "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't."

"Ah! Heh... heh... hi... you wouldn't hurt a poor crippled little pegasus, would you?" asked Sky.

"Try me, I've done worse," answered Swift.

Sky smiled. "Because I'm cuddly?"

"Hah, not in my book."

Sky backed away slowly. "Because I'm really scared and I don't want to die?"

Swift began moving in on Sky, when suddenly Evening appeared in front of them, almost as if she had teleported.

"What do you think you're doing?! I go to collect water, and you two are at each other's throats?" asked Evening.

"She started it," defended Sky.

"I don't care who started it. I already lost faith in something I held dear my entire life, I don't want to lose a friend in the same day!" said Evening angrily.

Maboo had been idly watching the whole thing. "I'm just enjoying a good show. These actors are amazing! They really look like they want to beat each other up." She took one of the water skins that Evening had recently refilled and took a sip from one of them.

"...Actors? Then Swift wasn't really trying to kill Sky?" asked Evening confusedly.

"Heck if I know, Swift looks really upset. The drama really works with the backdrop we've got going on here."

"If they are acting, they are good, but Swift is giving off murderous intent like I've never seen before. Look at her body language. And for that matter, look at Sky's eyes. She looks like she's really trying to find a way out. I had no idea I was traveling with such good show ponies on top of being great adventurers!"

Willow quickly came stomping towards Sky and Swift angrily. "Again?! If we are going to travel together, we need to learn not to kill each other."

"Well we weren't really having problems with that before Swift Blade showed up. I'm telling you, I don't like her type. They're not to be trusted," said Maboo.

"It's less 'everyone trying to kill each other' and more 'Sky Runner giving me reasons to kill her'," said Swift.

"What did she do this time? Steal something, or give the wrong thing back?" asked Willow.

"Stolen items," answered Swift. "Apparently she feels the need to know information about a mare's private happenings, that which can only be found in a diary. My thoughts are there for a reason, that I do not wish them to fall to the outside world. You can at least attempt to put her on a figurative leash."

"I've tried. Believe me, I've tried," said Willow with an eyeroll. "She gets better, though. Just keep important things on your person, or not let her know how important they are."

Swift sighed. "Fine. I'll try not to kill her. Bear in mind that my restraint in that area is limited, but I will attempt to control my urges. Just make sure she does the same."