Bullet Proof

by Gregmanwit

Rating: teen
Tags: Main 6, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Comedy, Big Macintosh, Adventure, Derpy Hooves, Crossover
Length: 1444

Two different accidents lead to similar fates for two completely different groups of friends.

It all started with a normal day on 2fort, as well as a normal day in Ponyville, but two different accidents will pull two different groups together in a struggle for survival.

Published 2012-02-27 14:44:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-02-27 14:44:01 UTC

Chapter 1-Computers

Bullet Proof

Chapter 1-Computers

It was a normal day in 2Fort. Birds were chirping, the sun was shining, and bodies took to the sky, only to land in a dusty thump. What's this? Are you startled, dear reader? Surely you have heard of this place before? The battlefield in which the "Reliable Excavation and Demolition" and the "Builders League United" teams go to take to their daily feuds? Perhaps you know it as "Tuefort"?

Anyways, in case you didn't know, it's completely normal for these two teams to be at constant bloody warfare over a farm, or a granary. However, this particular day was about to turn out not-so-normal pretty soon. How, then, you ask? Read the story and quit asking so many damn questions.

R.E.D Base: 6:58 A.M.

"AND FURTHERMORE, IF ANY OF YOU SPINELESS WORMS MANAGE TO GET LESS THAN TWENTY KILLS THIS MATCH, I WILL PERSONALLY STRANGLE YOU UNTIL YOUR PUSS-FILLED ORGANS SPEW OUT EVERY.."

Everyone had tuned out of soldier's speech by his second point about crits and were simply waiting anxiously for the round to start. "AND FURTHERMORE, IF-"

Mission begins in ten seconds

"Dah, finally. Everybody ready?"

"Jawohl."

"Yeh hah, let's do this!"

"Splendid."

"Hudda hadda hah."

"Alrighty then."

"Let's get bloody goin'."

"GETTON BELLOWS! *burp*"

"LAST ONE ALIVE, LOCK THE DOOR."

5...

4...

3...

2...

1...!

Let the games begin!

"INCOMIIIIIIING!"

The bridge, as usual, was was aflame with the violent chatter of warfare. Just two teams fighting for briefcases of papers that held information that they didn't know were important or not. It never mattered, though. They were fighting and that's all that matters. As usual, both teams were being assaulted by each of their soldier's banter.

"MAGGOTS, ARE YOU EVEN AIMING?"

"PYRO, SPY CHECK ON THE RIGHT!"

"TAKE OUT THAT SNIPER!"

"TAKE OUT THAT SOLDIER! HE'S TRYING TO CONFUSE US WITH FAKE ORDERS!"

R.E.D. Team Intel

*Alert! The enemy has taken our intelligence!*

*BOOM*

*The enemy has dropped our intelligence.*

*Our intelligence has returned to our base.*

The engineer loved it in the intel room. Not only to enjoy the sheer stupidity of B.L.U. Scout as he always made a dash for the intel, only to be blown into smithereens, but because of the peace and quiet the room provided him. The Engineer was a simple man, he just wanted to make man-sized robots that killed dozens without needing a reload. As he strummed on his guitar to his favorite song, "More Gun", he couldn't help but glance every now and then at the large glass window on the other side of the room. He had never really given it any thought before today. He just came down here to defend the intel with his machines as they slaughtered countless scouts, and occasionally, a Heavy and Medic pair. But his curiosity had been growing by the minute every time he looked at that perfect window. He wondered what secrets the monitors hid below that glass slope. He did love machines, of course, and computers were no exception.

"Incoming!" Engineer had recognized the voice immediately as the drunkard it belonged to charged into the room, a wobble in his walk and a briefcase of papers on his back.

*We have secured the enemy intelligence.*

Demoman let out something between a war cry and drunken babbling and raised his drink, now electrified with crits after the capture. "Cheers, mate!" he said before downing however much booze was left in the flask. Engineer sat there with a confused look on his face. "Now how in the hell did YOU capture the intel? You can barly walk straight, let alone aim that grenade launcher."

The scottsman cracked a wry smile. "What can I say? It's all in me scrumpy." He tried to down his drink once more, but came with a confused look as none of the alcohol met his tongue. He began to investigate his drink with his good eye for a minute before snapping his fingers. "I'm out. Gonna....gonna get s'more," he snapped as he began to wobble away. He was almost at the hall when he stopped and turned to the engineer. "What's gotcha lookin in that face'a yours?" he inquired to his colleague. Engineer suddenly diverted his glare from the glass wall once more to meet faces with the Demo. "Oh, uh, nothin's wrong, pardner," He lied. Demo cracked a grin and gave a chuckle. "Oh, common, Engi. I may be drunk, but I can tell when yer lien."

Engineer silently swore to himself as he spoke, "Ok, fine, you got me. I-" He hesitated. "-I wanted to know what was on all those computers behind that glass wall, ok?" Demo Looked at him with a confused look and walked over to the wall Engineer motioned to, with Engi in tow behind him. Demo gave the computers a thoughtful examination before speaking again. "I don't see what's so important. They don't have anything on them!" Engineer rubbed his temples in annoyance. "That's because they're not turned on. I just wanted to get in to check them."

Demoman seemed to ponder Engineer's interest for a moment. "Step back." Engineer cocked his head. "What?" He replied. Demo turned to his questioneer. "I said step back." Engineer obeyed as he returned to his dispenser, fearing whatever Demo was going to do wasn't going to be pretty. The scottsman stepped back as well and pulled out his stickey launcher and took aim. Engineer realized what his drunken friend was about to do and gave a worried look. "Uh, Demo, I don't think we should do that. We could get into a LOT of trouble with command and-"

*BOOM*

Glass shattered and crashed all over the room as Demo turned to his curious friend. "Ya got ten minutes before Soldier comes down to give a lecture. I'll keep watch."

"Twilight? Twilight? Where are you? I made breakfast!"

Spike had been searching through the library for what had seemed like hours, but in reality had been about five minutes. He noticed something was wrong when he had gone downstairs after waking up for breakfast. He sat down at the kitchen table for a few minutes in half slumber before realizing three things were different this morning. One was that there was no breakfast on the table. He always knew Twilight made breakfast for the two every morning. To see the table bare was what made spike think something was wrong. "Maybe she slept in," He had thought earlier, thinking of ways to explain the predicament. It was then when he caught a brilliant idea. "I'll make her breakfast!"

It took him a while and the pancakes were a little burnt, but they were pancakes none the less. He had a bright smile on his face has he brought them up the staircase for her. I can't wait to see the look on her face when she sees this, he thought as he approached the bedroom. It was then he noticed the second problem. Not only had twilight not made breakfast, but she was awake. He thought she had left to do some business with Rarity or the like and decided to go ask around. He placed the breakfast tray on the table in the living room and headed for the door. It was the he noticed the third problem. The door was locked. The door of the library was only able to be locked from the outside.
Returning to current times, He had already searched the whole house as he started to get tired. He was moments from succumbing to a nap when he heard sudden clanking on mettal in the basement. He hurriedly dashed to the basement door with his tray of pancakes and knocked. "Twilight? You in there? I made pancakes!" The sounds of hard work stopped as he heard hoofsteps approaching the door.
The door swung open to reveal, as Spike had expected, Twilight. The only problem was that it looked like she hadn't gotten any sleep at all. Her mane was a mess, there were bags under her eyes, and she struggled to keep them open. "Woa, Twilight, what happened?" Spike said in a worried tone. Twilight emitted a light chuckle as she replied. "Oh, sorry for worrying you, Spike. I found these REALY tempting plans for some sort of teleporter and I built it last night." Spike blinked. "You what?" Before he could get his response, she slumped to the ground and immediately began snoring. Spike crossed his arms. "Oh brother..."

AN: This is my second try at a crossover. Tell me what you think.