BUCK's Britannia: Give 'em the boot

by Barrobroadcaster

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other, Original Character, Comedy, Random
Length: 937

Britannia is given the sad task of informing three recent recruits to the Royal Guard that they have not lived up to expectation.

My own submission to BUCK's fanfiction contest.
The Royal Guard is an elite organization. They accept only the best into their ranks and not every pony makes the cut. As a high-ranking officer in the Guard, it is Britannia's difficult duty to inform three recent recruits that they have not met the Guard's expectations. But does she really have the heart to simply give them the boot?

Published 2013-08-21 19:30:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-08-21 19:30:02 UTC

Dismissal

Britannia spent a quick moment arranging things in front of her, the three dismissal letters, position of her quill and ink well on the desk. She levitated the first form in front of her. The name Cadet Clepto was written at the top.

She took one last deep breath, reading the name of the pony she was about to discharge from the service.

"All right," she addressed Private Buckler standing at the door. "Send him in."

A yellow unicorn colt entered the office and saluted.

"Cadet Clepto? We need to talk," Britannia said.

"I... I work very hard, ma'am. I haven't been slacking in performance have I?" he asked.

"No, it's not that," Britannia said, looking down at his letter. "Your superiors have been noticing some strange behavior and I'm afraid that it's-" she stopped mid sentence and looked up. The unicorn's horn glowed.

"Cadet Clepto? Are you... casting a spell?"

"Umm... no," he replied.

"Right... well, Officer Brim reported that you seemed to be responsible with some things that may have gone missing recently." She reached over to her quill and realized it was gone. As was her desk lamp.

"Cadet Clepto?" she asked, a little annoyed.

"Yes, ma'am?" he asked.

"Would you mind waiting at in the hall?" she asked, frustrated.

"Of course," the yellow unicorn replied. He walked to the door, his horn still glowing.

"Cadet Clepto?" Britannia asked again. He turned to her. "My lamp and quill please?" The cadet grinned and the items levitated down from the ceiling. He then walked out. She'd deal with him later. Hopefully the other washouts would be easier to let go.

"Send in the next cadet, please," she told the private.

A blue Pegasus colt walked in and saluted. Britannia checked his information. According to the letter in front of her, Cadet Toner was a red Pegasus, not blue.

"Cadet Toner? It says here you're a red Pegasus?"

"Yes, ma'am," he replied.

She looked down and checked again. "It says here you're blue. Must be a typo," she said, looking back up. Britannia raised an eyebrow.

"Cadet Toner? Why are you yellow now?"

The colt looked puzzled. "I'm sorry ma'am, what do you mean?" as he asked the question, he began turning green.

"Hallway, please," Britannia said, putting a hoof to her temple. This was not easy. The colt turned purple as he exited.

"Send in the last contestant please, Private," she said.

A white earth mare walked in and saluted. "CADET SHOUTS REPORTING FOR DUTY, MA'AM!" she yelled. The cadet's voice boomed.

Britannia crouched behind her desk. "Cadet Shouts? Why are you yelling?" she asked softly.

"MY CUTIE MARK IS IN YELLING MA'AM!" the cadet yelled again.

"Hallway, now!" Britannia gestured.

"YES MA'AM!" the pony said. Britannia's lamp cracked at the last remark as the mare exited. Private Buckler adjusted his uniform.

"There has to be an easier way to do this," Britannia said to herself. She turned to the private one more time. "Send them all in together, please."

The three cadets reentered the room. Each saluted. The unicorn's horn glowed, the pegasi's coat changed color and the loud cadet... thankfully kept her mouth shut.

Britannia got up from her desk. "Now, the three of you have been called here today because... I've been ordered to inform you that you've each been dismissed."

Several things, a vase, alarm clock, Britannia's desk lamp all dropped from the ceiling as Cadet Clepto recoiled in shock. Cadet Toner began nervously changing color from red, to yellow to orange.

"WHAT? WHY?!" Cadet Shouts asked.

Britannia looked at each of the cadets as they trembled before her. Yes, they were different even a detriment to the guard. But they had performed their duties well despite their quirks. Could she really do this?

"Cadets, I have made a decision," Britannia announced. "The three of you are going to be joining me on a... special task force."

"REALLY?" Cadet Shouts asked, enthusiastic.

"Yes. I believe each of your unique abilities will be very useful in this new operations group, You're to be transferred to my direct command immediately. Return to the barracks, collect your things and then report to me for new assignment," Britannia ordered.

The three exchanged excited looks. "YES MA'AM!" they responded in unison, each as loud as Cadet Shouts.

"Very good, your dismissed," Britannia said, ripping up the letters in front of her. The three trotted out of the room happily and once again, the captain noticed her quill and a few other items from her desk weren't missing. The door closed behind them and she was left alone in her office with the private.

"Beggin' ya pardon, miss, but weren't you supposed to dismiss the cadets?" Private Buckler asked.

She nodded. "I did, Private Buckler. I dismissed them and reassigned them," she explained.

"I... I see, miss," the private said, somewhat understanding. But really, Britannia understood it best. That one moment, she remembered how she'd been recruited to the Royal Guard. How she had been brought into this very office, stood before a captain. How she was so nervous she turned red, how she was so scared she might've spoken a little too loudly and how she'd forgotten and left with the captain's quill after she'd signed her own service form. She understood all too well.

Author's Note

In order to be in the competition, this story had to be no more than 1,000 words. In order to be on FIMFiction, it had to be no less than 1,000 words. Which is why this story is exactly 1,000 words.
This... was... a challenge.