Regular Ponies

Chapters

Poker Faces and Butt Tattoos
Apple Apple Apple Apple Apple Apple
Horses.

Poker Faces and Butt Tattoos

"Dude, you're horrible!"

"Shut up!"

I glance at Rigby from my spot on the couch. "You didn't even try! You're supposed to jump over the gap."

"I did, I pressed 'jump'!" Rigby throws up his hands before pointing at me. "I keep telling you this controller is busted." To emphasize his point, he lifts the controller and waves it around, although I'm not exactly sure how that backs up what he claimed in the least.

I cross my arms and smirk at him. "Hmm, hmm."

Rigby narrows his eyes at me. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I knew you'd try that lame busted controller excuse again," I reach over and grab his controller. "So I switched them."

"What?"

"That's right, dude. I've been playing with the 'busted' controller." I throw his controller back to him and scoff as it hits him in the chest before falling into his hands. "Just admit you suck at this game."

"No! I don't suck, and I'll prove it to you!" He stands up on the couch so that he's eye-level with me. He stares at me for about half of a second before turning back to the screen. I watch as he starts his turn and his little character moves across the screen. Let's face it, Rigby has never been good at video games. I'd thought about that when I bought this game. I was gonna buy that awesome looking new game, King Fighters. When I opened the case and saw the directions in that little pamphlet thing, I knew there was no way Rigby was gonna be able to keep up. I'm not saying he's stupid, but when it comes to memorizing buttons and maneuvers, he is in no way qualified for it. Besides, I just know that if I'd gotten it he would have whined about how hard it was. This game seemed more his speed. All you have to do is jump over spikes and gaps in the ground. I thought he could easily handle that.

"Crap!"

Or not.

"You'd think that as many times as you've done this level, you'd remember where the spikes pop out." I comment. He doesn't say anything, but he gives me an icy glare, which is enough to shut me up. After knowing someone for as long as we have, you learn about boundaries and how far you can push them.

"Hey, you two!" I know who it is without looking up, but I do anyway.

"Oh, hey Benson. What's up?"

Benson crosses his arms. "Did you finish mowing the football field?"

"Uh..." Shoot, I forgot that was even on the list.

"Yeah, we finished it."

Dang it, Rigby.

"Oh, did you?" I can see Benson's face starting to get a bit pink and I sit up. "Then why is the mower still in the GARAGE?"

"Dude, quit lying!" I smack Rigby on the shoulder and get to my feet. "Sorry Benson," I say, glaring at Rigby. "We'll get it done."

"You better! If I catch you two slacking off again YOU'RE FIRED." With his usual threat, Benson turns and walks through the kitchen. I don't move as I listen for the slam of the back door. When it comes, I cross my arms turn to look at Rigby, who raises an eyebrow.

"What?"

Mowing the football field is hard, boring, and lame. Benson banned Rigby and I from using the gas mower after that time we tried to impress him to get plaques, so we had to use those stupid little push mowers. It took a long time, but if it had just been one of us it would have taken a lot longer.

"You sure you wanna try that video game again, dude?"

"Totally, I just need practice." He grunts as he pushes his mower over a rock in his path.

"You got it?" I reach out to move the mower for him, but stop when I see him dislodge it himself.

"Yeah. Anyway, you don't get good at videogames in an hour. At least normal people don't." He says the last sentence with an envious glare in my direction. I'll admit, he has some reason to be spiteful. I don't mean to brag, but I've got mad gaming skills. I'm used to playing more advanced games, and when I sit down and play a video game as easy as the one we'd been playing earlier, it's hard not be good at it.

I let go of my mower to get the garage door, the creaking of it reminding me that I really need to tell Skips about it. Once the door was open I grab my mower and motion for Rigby to bring his through. After doing so, Rigby wipes his forehead with the back of his hand and sighs. "It sucks that we can't use the gas mower."

"Yeah, well maybe if we hadn't tried to impress Benson we'd still be able to use it." I throw the comment over my shoulder as I close the garage door. I leap back quickly and breathe a sigh of relief as the metal door barely misses my fingers.

"Hey, that was your idea." Rigby crosses his arms.

"So? It's not like I forced you to go along with it."

"Whatever."

"Crap!"

"Just give up."

"No!" I sigh and rest my elbow on the arm of the couch before adding my chin to the palm of my hand. He's been going at it for over any hour and, just ten minutes ago, he finally made it to the first checkpoint in the first level. It was funny at first, but now it was just getting repetitive and boring.

"Why don't you take a break, it might help. You've been staring at the screen for a long time." I suggest as I turn to look at Rigby. He opens his mouth to speak, but whatever look I have on my face makes him reconsider it.

"Ugh, fine." He puts the controller on the coffee table and hops off the couch. "I need food."

Happy to have something else to do, I get up and follow him into the kitchen. When I get to the kitchen doorway, I'm pretty surprised to see Skips sitting at the table with someone I thought he hated. "Death?"

"Why, if it isn't Mordecai!" Death leans back in his chair and links his hands together behind his head. "I forgot that you and Rigby worked here with ol' Skips."

I chuckle and rub the back of my neck awkwardly. "Yeah..."

Skips turns around in his chair and looks at me. "How do you guys know Death?"

Rigby speaks before I can answer the question. "Me and Mordecai babysat his son to save Muscle Man."

"What??" Skips glares at Rigby with a mixture of annoyance and worry on his face. "Do you have any idea just how bad that could have turned out?"

"Relax, Skips. It's not like we failed or anything." Rigby opens up the fridge and peers inside, throwing the last sentence over his shoulder.

"Yeah, Muscle Man's still here, isn't he?" I walk over to the counter beside the fridge and lean against it as I defend ourselves. We hadn't failed, but we'd come pretty dang close. I'm just glad that Death hadn't called us up to babysit his little monster again since.

"You guys still shoulda come to me." Skips grumbles.

"Oye, Skips! Are we playin' cards or aren't we?"

"Whaddaya playin'?" Rigby asks with a sandwich in hand. He makes his way over to Death's side of the table and looks down at his hand. "Aw, what? Death, you-"

Luckily, I'm able to slap my hand over his mouth before he can finish talking. "Rigby, keep your mouth shut!" Even though Rigby's strength is near to being nonexistent, his size makes holding him still a challenge.

"But, dude look at his hand, he could totally bluff right now!"

At that, Death jumps up from his seat and throws his cards on the table. "What is wrong with you? Do you have any idea what I'm playing for here?"

"Sorry, Death! Rigby doesn't understand poker, he doesn't know what he's talking about. Right, dude?" The sentence tumbles out faster than my lips can move, making the sentence seem a bit garbled.

Rigby finally catches on and laughs, but the sweat breaking out on his forehead betrays his uneasiness. "Aha, yeah! No idea! I've never even played poker!"

Death will have none of it, though. His eyes (or where his eyes should be) glows bright and grow to about three times their size. "So, you like ruining things, eh? Let's see how you like it getting your lives ruined!"

"What?" Crap, I hate it when my voice cracks. It takes a lot of the firmness out of whatever I say.

"Death, stop!" Skips gets up from the table quickly, making his chair fall to the ground.

If Death had heard Skips, he didn't show it. His hands glow as he raises them above our heads, and I feel a sick yellow aura wrap around Rigby and I, so tight that I can't move. With a wicked smile, he snaps his fingers and my world went black, and the last thing I see is Skips being too late to save us.

My head and back are killing me. I can hear Rigby groan beside me and I can tell that he's probably experiencing the same thing. Whatever is in front of me is bright; I know that without even opening my eyes. I sigh and open them slowly, only to have them snap open at what I see. Everything looks normal, except that it doesn't. The trees are too green. The sky is too clear. "What the heck..." I groan as I look around through a narrowed gaze. Everything looks... really bright and cheerful. I sit up and close my eyes, resting my forehead into my hooves and...

Wait... hooves?

I open my eyes and look at where my arms were supposed to be, only to see two black hooves, which were attached to long blue legs. "Wha... what..." I hear Rigby struggling to sit up and turn to look at him. He has a patch of curly brown hair on his head that travels down the back of his neck. His muzzle, neck, and chest are a lighter shade of brown, his tail is ringed. He looks the same.

Except for the fact that he has a weird looking tattoo on his back leg and that he's a horse now.

Rigby looks back at me and opens his mouth, but whatever he's about to say stops when he looks at me. I have no idea what I look like, but if Rigby still looks mostly the same, then I guess I do too. His mouth moves to form words. No sound comes out, so I figure I should help him out by stating the obvious.

"We're horses, dude."

Rigby looks down at his hooves and stares at them, mouth agape. He slowly turns to look back at me before sucking in a breath. "WHY ARE WE HORSES?"

"I don't know!" I put a han-hoof to my forehead. "I guess this is our punishment from Death."

"Ugh, this sucks! I dunwanna be a horse!"

"Well, neither do I! This never would have happened if you had shut up when I told you to!"

"How was I supposed to know that Death took poker so seriously?"

I glare at him for a second longer before sighing and shaking my head. "Let's just try and see where we are." I stand up shakily and swallow as I look back to see as much of me as I can. It looks like Rigby isn't the only one with a new tattoo. While his tattoo is a game controller with a red aura, mine is a game controller with a dark blue aura. This might sound weird, but it looks really natural on my new body. I also have wings. Well, okay, I've always had wings but they were my arms. Now my arms are legs and my wings are wings. They're blue with black stripes going across each feather, just like how my hands had looked. My legs are black about half way up, and went to being blue the rest of the way up. I still look the same, mostly. I just have a different body structure.

I look back at Rigby, only to see him staring at me with a dumbfounded look on his face. "What?"

"I didn't know your eyes were blue."

"Yeah, well I didn't know your's were brown."

Walking on hooves is really hard. They're heavy, clunky, and the sounds they make when walking is really distracting. I don't recognize the place that we're in at all, then again it was just a grassy plain with a few trees and some flowers.

"Any idea where we are?" Rigby asks from behind me.

I sigh and shake my head. "No, all I can see is grass, grass, and more grass."

"Why don't you fly up and see if you can see anything else?"

That actually isn't a bad idea; I forgot I had wings now. How do I use them, though? I take a deep breath and unfurl my wings for the first time. I don't really get how, but unfurling them feels really natural. I mean, it feels weird having two extra limbs, but I guess my instincts read the manual on them before my mind had. Unfurling them is easy, but the actual getting off the ground is gonna be hard.

"How do I use these things?" I murmur to myself.

"You don't know how to use wings?!"

I look up at a new voice. It's kinda scratchy, and it definitely belongs to a girl. "Who said that? Where are you?" I frown and look around, but I don't see anyone.

"Up there!" Rigby shouts, pointing a hoof toward the sky. I follow the direction of his hoof to see a blue pony sitting on a cloud, staring at me with a condescending magenta gaze.

She smirks as she flips her prismatic mane. "Sup?"

"'Sup'? What do you mean 'sup'?" Rigby raises an eyebrow at her

"By 'sup', I mean 'sup'. Not very quick at catchin' on, huh?"

"Who are you?" I repeat my previous question.

With a confident smile, the pony unfurls her own wings and drifts down to us. "Name's Rainbow Dash."

Rainbow Dash? Well, the name definitely fits her. Both parts of her mane have the colors of a rainbow, while her tail is decked out in every color. Even her butt tattoo has rainbow colors in it.

I'm so busy thinking about her name that I don't notice the impatient tapping of her hoof and her narrowed eyes. "Oh, uh. Did you say something?"

"Yeah, I asked for your names."

"Oh, well I'm Mordecai." I point at Rigby. "That's Rigby."

"Cool," Her warm gaze turns critical as she stares at me. "So, I heard you say you didn't know how to use your wings?"

"How did you hear me, I barely even whispered it!"

"Pegasi have keen hearing; surely you understand that?"

I guess I can see the logic in that. Flying around with wind going through your ears must make it hard to listen for other things.

"Anyway, why don't you know how to use your wings?" Rainbow Dash presses on, leaning forward to where our muzzles are only an inch apart.

Aw, crap. What can I tell her? I exchange a glance with Rigby, who sucks in enough breath for a quick lie. "He's afraid of heights!"

Yeah, Rigby. She'll totally believe that a Pegasus will be afraid of heights. I'm about to contradict my numskull friend, but to my surprise, Rainbow Dash is nodding.

"Yeah, one of my best friends are too. I didn't think it was possible for a Pegasus to be scared of heights, but I guess both of you proved me wrong." She grins.

"Ye-yeah." I stutter. That one had been close. If I tell her I that I come from another world, she'll probably just leave us here to wander around this field.

"Where are you from?" Rigby asks. "I mean, you would have had to fly really fast to get way out here; unless wherever you came from isn't far."

"Hey," Rainbow interjects, her voice cracking. That makes me feel better about my own voice cracks, it's good to know that I'm not the only one it happens to. "I'm the greatest flyer in Equestria!" She flicks her tail and rolls her eyes. "But yeah, Ponyville isn't even a mile from here. That where you guys are heading?"

Ponyville and Equestria. Clever. "Uh, yeah." It's not The Park, but any civilization is better than aimlessly wandering this field.

"Well, we could walk there but it'd be faster if I pushed you on this cloud." She flaps her wings and flies back up to the cloud. As she brings it down, she darts her eyes between Rigby and I. "You're gonna have to carry him on your back or something."

"What, why?" Rigby asks, his eyes wide.

"Um, hello?" Rainbow rolls her eyes again. "Only Pegasi can stay on clouds. Were you two sheltered growing up or something?"

That gets some embarrassment from me. "C'mon, dude. Let's just get this over with." I'm still considerably taller than him, so to make things easier, I bend down. I hear him sigh as he makes his way toward me and I finally feel his weight on my back. Usually he's never this heavy, but his new horse body must have really given him some extra weight. I take a deep breath and shakily straighten up.

I hear Rainbow Dash chuckle from behind me. "Yeah, sorry about that. Earth Ponies are pretty heavy; even the fittest looking one can give you some sore muscles."

Well, since Rigby is already out of shape, it practically guarantees me some sore muscles. I make my way to the cloud and stand on it. Rainbow immediately begins lifting the cloud, making me wobble a bit. Next thing I know, we're speeding through the air, and soon enough I can see buildings ahead of us. I grunt as Rigby shifts around on my back. "Dude, what are you doing up there?"

"Your wings are in the way!"

"Deal with it!"

"Can you guys shut up?"

Okay, I'll admit: being pushed around on a cloud in the sky is really fun. Rainbow Dash must be stronger than she looks since she was able to push both me and Rigby around at the kind of speed she was doing. I feel kind of bad, though, because when we got Ponyville I saw that she looked kind of tired.

Speaking of Ponyville, the town looks really nice. There's a lot of pink, yeah, but in general it just looks really cheerful and welcoming. Every horse that walks by Rigby and I gives us warm looks and nods, some even shout a greeting our way.

"Wow, everyone's so nice here." Rigby echos my thoughts out loud.

"Ha, you think they're nice, wait til you meet another pony I've got in mind." Rainbow Dash chuckles as she gives the cloud a quick buck and it disappears before my eyes. On our way here, I'd see Rainbow looking up at the sky and talking about how good her team had done with the clouds. From what little context that gave me, I'm gonna guess that somehow Pegasi can manipulate weather. I mean, no other type of ponies can fly up there, so it has to be Pegasi, right?

"Hey, Mordecai, see that pink pony over there?" Rainbow Dash interrupts my thoughts. She points near a really, really pink building. At first I can't see what pony she's referring to, but I'm able to see it when it detaches itself from the building. The pony is a really light bubblegum pink with a darker pink mane and really bright blue eyes. "That's Pinkie Pie, she's the pony I was telling you about."

I guess Pinkie Pie must have heard her name, because when Rainbow says it, her head immediately turns toward us. I see her over by the building and next thing I know, Rigby and I are getting the life squeezed out of us by her.

"Ohmygoshnewponies!" She says in quick breath. I'm beginning to run out of oxygen, and I can see Rigby trying to pull away.

"Relax, Pinks! They need to breathe." Rainbow laughs as she pulls the pink pony off of us.

"Sorry, Dashie! You know how I get around new ponies! I know everypony in town and when I saw them I knew that they were new, I mean I think I would recognize a super tall blue and black pony and super short brown one!"

This pony is talking so fast I can barely keep up with her, Rainbow and Rigby seem to be a bit lost too. When Rainbow had said that this pony was gonna be even nicer than the rest, she hadn't been lying. She even looks like a ball of energy. Her mane is curly and full of bounce, and her eyes are bright.

"What're your names, huh huh huh?" Pinkie bounces in front of Rigby and I.

"Uh, Mordecai and Rigby." I answer, pointing to ourselves in turn.

"Woah, those are some strange names. I've never heard of those kinds of names, a lot of names here have two parts, but a lot of ponies just have one part to their names, like my friend Rarity! But then again..."

I give up on trying to keep up with her. I don't know what kind of medicine she's on (or should be on), but she'd obviously forgotten to take it. Rainbow exchanges an amused glance with me and rolls her eyes good-naturedly.

Pinkie Pie brings me back to reality by letting out a huge gasp, like she'd just been horribly injured. I back up and look her over, trying to see where she was hurt.

Rigby takes a step back, too. "What's wrong?"

"If I've never seen you guys before then it must mean you're both new! Like really, really new! Which means that the only ponies you know in town so far are me and Dashie, which means that you don't have any other friends! You know what this calls for?"

Before I can answer, she springs upward and hangs in the air for way longer than gravity should allow. "A PARTY!" When she finally lands, she reaches behind her a pulls out a blue and pink cannon, which I swear wasn't there before. "Dashie! You, Mordecai, and Rigby need to come to Sugarcube Corner later tonight, okay?" Without waiting for an answer, she and her cannon race off, leaving only a dust outline of them hanging in the air.

"What is she on?" Rigby asks, scratching his head.

"She's not on anything," Rainbow Dash glares at Rigby. "She's just really happy and energetic."

"If you ask me, I'd say she's more than energetic."

Rainbow Dash looks as if she's gonna blow her top, so I quickly change the subject. "So, what do these butt tattoos mean?"

Rainbow Dash goes from being angry to being genuinely dumbfounded in a time span of two seconds. "'Butt tattoos'? You mean 'cutie marks'?"

Cutie marks? Aw man, this world is getting girlier and girlier by the second. "Um, yeah those."

"Wow, you really must have been sheltered." She shakes her head before answering. "Cutie marks represent a pony's special talent. Did you see Pinkie's..." she snickers before continuing. "...butt tattoo?" Rigby snorts as he holds in his laughter.

"Ow! Dude, what was that for?" He glares at me, rubbing the back of his neck.

I love having wings; it's so much easier to reach back and slap him every time he does or says something stupid.

Rainbow Dash smirks. "Anyway, I'm gonna take off."

"What? Why?" I ask. I don't like the idea of walking around this town with nowhere to go.

"Don't worry, I've got four other friends in this town you'll most likely run into. You probably won't see Pinkie, since she's setting up your party. Anyway over there," She points her hoof at what looks like a farm in the distance. "Is where my friend Applejack lives. If you feel hungry before the party, go there. She and her family will stuff you so full you won't be able to move. Then over there," She points in the opposite direction at a treehouse. "Is where my friend Twilight lives. I wouldn't hang around there long though, unless you speak egghead. And if you wanna be dressed up against your will, head on over there," I follow her gaze as she stared at fancy-looking blue building. "Then again, once Rarity pulls some of her 'pony charm' on you, you'll probably be dying to do it for her. Oh, and remember my friend I told you about? The one scared of heights? Yeah, she's that-a way." She points her wing near a forest. "The only building out there, ya can't miss it." She smirks and gives us a salute before dashing into the sky.

Heh, "dashing".

Rigby takes a few steps forward and looks around before looking back at me. "I dunno about you, dude, but I'm starving. I'm off to that farm."

"That place is like, two miles away!"

"Yeah, well maybe we could get there fast if you could fly."

"Just shut up."

"Seriously, dude. We don't know how long we're gonna be here, so you might as well learn how to use them. Maybe Rainbow Dash can teach you or something."

I guess that isn't a bad idea, and Rigby has a good point. We could be here forever, and being able to fly would definitely come in handy. Asking Rainbow Dash to teach me, though, doesn't appeal to me. Don't get me wrong, she's cool and funny, but she doesn't seem very patient or sympathetic.

"Nah, I don't think having Rainbow Dash teach me would be a very good idea."

Rigby seems to ponder that for a moment, the focused look looks out of place; it's often I see him do some actual thinking. He looks up at me as we continue walking in the direction of the farm. "What about that friend she talked about, the one who's scare of heights?"

"Seriously? What makes you think she can even fly?"

"Well if Rainbow Dash is friends with her, then she's gotta be able to do some flying."

"Yeah, I guess that makes sense. I wonder what she'll- Ah!" I'm interrupted when a cloud of grey and vanilla zooms about an inch away from my face.

"What the heck was that?" Rigby asks as he quickly bounds in the direction it had gone.

It's only about a yard away, and on closer inspection, it turns out to be a pony. A Pegasus, to be more precise. She has a messy, vanilla color mane and tail, a grey coat, and yellow eyes that never seem to agree on which direction they should go in. The owner of the stand she's crashed into is frowning as he noses her to her hooves. "You okay, Ditzy?"

The Pegasus grins sheepishly. "Yeah, I'm okay." Her smile disappears when she looks at the stand, or what's left of it. "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry!"

"Ah, think none of it, Ditzy." The stand owner smiles, but it looks forced.

Ditzy doesn't seem to notice as she smiles and turns away, only to bump into Rigby. "Oops, sorry!"

"Um, it's fine." Rigby looks pretty uncomfortable as the mare looks at him.

She looks between the two of us and puts on smile. "Hi! I've never seen you two before. You must be the two stallions that Pinkie's throwing the party for, right?"

"Uh, ye-yeah. We are." I stutter out.

She smiles at me. "I'm Ditzy Doo, or 'Derpy' as most call me."

Derpy? That sounds kind of mean, but she doesn't seem bothered by it.

"Are you going to the party?"

"Yup! Anyway, Mrs. Cake wanted me to help her bake muffins for the party. See you guys later!" With that, she flaps her wings and flies off in the direction where that pink building had been.

"Well she was..." I honestly don't know how to finish that sentence. She seems alright. A little clutzy, but cool.

Rigby shakes his head. "She just was, dude."

Author's Note

Last Edited: 9/27/12

Apple Apple Apple Apple Apple Apple

Getting to the farm doesn't take nearly as long as I originally think it does. It turns out to be only about five minutes away from that cart we'd seen that mare (I think her name was Ditzy or something?) crash into. Now Rigby and I are standing in front of a large oak gate, and attached to the gate is a sign that says Sweet Apple Acres in big, bold letters. Upon peering over the fence, I can see why it was called that. There are apple trees about as far as I can see. The barn has apples painted on it, I can see apple-shaped wind chimes hanging off the porch of the nearby farmhouse. Apples are everywhere, I guess... Apple are everywhere, would be the fact that I'm trying to get across.

The gate creaks as Rigby pushes it open, and almost immediately after, a blur of brown and white comes after Rigby and knocks him to the ground. I'm about to push it off until I see that it's just a dog. The dog sits on Rigby's chest and stares at him with a happy gleam in her eyes; it sort of reminds me of Pinkie, actually.

"Ugh!" He pushes the dog off of him and stands up. After brushing himself off, he looks at the dog. "Hmm. Hmm. Step off! Step off!" he yells, with the arm movements to match. It doesn't seem to affect the dog much, though. It just stares at him with a blank look and a smile.

"There you are, Winona!" Rigby and I look up when we hear a deep, Southern accent. It doesn't take long to find the owner of it. An orange mare is trotting up to us, a look of annoyance and relief on her face and her green eyes bright. She looks up at me and grins. "Thank ya'll kindly for findin' her."

"Actually, she found us." I chuckle, looking down at Rigby.

"Either way, thanks." She tips her stetson. "I'm Applejack. Welcome to Sweet Apple Acres! Ain't never seen the likes of ya'll around here."

"Um, yeah. We just got here." Rigby grins sheepishly.

"That means you must've already received Pinkie's welcome, huh? I hope she didn't get the confetti and cake canons mixed up again."

"Canon?" Rigby tilts his head and looks up at me, only to have me shrug and look back at Applejack.

Applejack's mouth makes an "o" shape. "Ah, well just, ah... Forget I said anything." She clears her throat before brightening up again. "So! If ya'll are new, you must be hungry! C'mon in, we've got plenty to share!"

She turns and begins a steady trot towards the farmhouse, giving Rigby and I no choice but to follow her. She seems pretty cool so far. She's pretty, but in the sense of being conservative about it. Not to mention that she's strong. If Rainbow Dash is strong, then this mare is... I can't think of a another word for "stronger". Let's just say that Applejack is stronger. Rainbow has an athletic body; lean and chiseled. Applejack is athletic too, but her strength is visible on almost every inch of her body. She works on a farm, I guess that has a lot to do with how strong she is.

When we get to the house, Applejack stops and looks to her left before putting on a smirk. "C'mon, Big Mac! Do ya need your little sister to come out there and show ya how it's done?"

I follow her gaze to see an older, bigger red stallion out in the field with a plow attached to his midsection. I can see why Applejack is teasing him, he looks like he's having a lot of trouble dragging the plow across the field.

The stallion, who's name I'm guessing was Big Mac, lets out a snort and glares at Applejack. "Nope."

Applejack chuckles. "Ya sure?"

"Eyup."

Applejack rolls her eyes and looks back at us with a wink. “That stallion is just ashamed that his little sister can do his work more easily than he can.”

I laugh while Rigby grins on. When Applejack opens the door to the house, the smell of warm apple pie washes over me, the smell making me realize just how hungry I am. I can't even remember when the last time I ate was. The morning we were teleported here? How long had we been lying unconscious in that field anyway? We could have already been here a week and not know it. Aw man. If we have actually been here a week, then Benson must have already made up his mind to fire us. Then again... Skips had witnessed the whole thing. Surely he would have told Benson about what had happened; Surely he wouldn’t have just left us out to dry? He's not like that, right?

Right?

While I had been zoned out and lost in my thinking, Rigby looks to have been having a staring contest with a kid. Despite being yellow and red instead of orange and blonde, the little filly looks like a tiny version of Applejack. She looks strong for her age too, which makes me wonder if muscles run in the family, or if they're results of hard work.

“Dude, what are you doing?”

“I’m totally kicking this kid’s butt in staring!”

The filly frowns without moving her eyes off of my friend’s face. “No I ain’t! My eyes are just fine! ‘Sides,” She smirks before continuing. “I’m used to workin’ outside in the bright Sun, and doin’ night harvestin’.” She shrugz and lifts an eyebrow in the most adorable smug look I have ever seen. “Sorry, but you’re just no match.”

The little filly has a point. I can last a long time without blinking, but that's just from staying up really late and staring at a TV screen back when I was in high school. This kid actually has hard work put into her ability.

While I waited for Rigby to lose, I take a look around the house. It has a warm, welcoming atmosphere about it; it's actually pretty comfortable. There's a fireplace a few feet away from the couch, and on the mantle sits rows upon rows of pictures. I can see a picture of Applejack and Rainbow Dash with unruly manes and grins on their faces as they each held up a ribbon that said “Thanks for competing in the Running of the Leaves! At least you tried!”. Next to the that picture is a picture of Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and a few other mares I haven't met yet. One is a beautiful ivory colored Unicorn with a well-groomed purpleish/blueish mane. Sitting next to her is a yellow Pegasus with a long rose-colored mane and a shy smile. Lastly is the lavender Unicorn in the middle with a carefully cut mane.

I can also see the filly Rigby was competing against squished in the middle of two other fillies; a Unicorn and a Pegasus. None of them had their cutie marks yet, which kind of perplexed me. I thought that you were born with them, but I guess I was wrong.

I look away from the mantle just in time to see Rigby lose. He blinks after letting out a long groan. After opening his eyes he glares at his opponent, who raises her head triumphantly. “Told ya!”

I laugh before looking around the room. Someone is missing. “Where’d Applejack go?”

“Oh, she’s in the kitchen gettin’ ya’ll a couple pieces of pie.”

“Applebloom,” the mare in question pops her head around a doorway and gives the filly an accusatory look. “You ain’t botherin’ our guests, are ya?”

“What? Me?” The filly, who I now had a name for, sticks out her bottom lip, frowns, and stares at the orange mare with an offended look on her face. I have to say, she looks really convincing.

Applejack rolls her eyes and looks back at Rigby and I. “Don’t ya’ll mind my little sister. She can be a pain in the flank at times.” She gives a playful smile at Applebloom, who scoffed in response, before ducking back into the kitchen.

“Like she’s any different.” she mutters.

I have to say that Applejack and her little sister are pretty cool. They're obviously hard workers, which is practically shouted from their physiques, but they're also really laid back. You don’t meet a lot of people like that. Benson is okay, I guess. He has a really bad temper, though.

“Eat up, ya’ll!” I look up to see Applejack walk in, three plates of pie expertly balanced on her nose.

Applebloom beams and leaps at the older mare, snatching the top plate in her teeth as she glided past. “Thankth for tha pie, thith!” she mumbles around the plate.”

“You’re welcome, Sugarcube.” She smiles at Rigby and I. “Well, eat up fellas.” She sets the remaining plates on the small coffee table in the middle of the room.

“Thanks, Applejack.” I thank the mare as I sit next to Rigby. I raise my hoof to start eating before I realize something. I don't know how to eat with hooves. I look expectantly at Rigby, but he seems just as lost as I feel. I catch a glimpse of Applejack frowning.

“Is somethin’ wrong with it? Are ya’ll allergic to apples or cinnamon?”

“No! No, that’s not it.” Shoot. Like I said, Applejack is obviously a hard worker, and hard workers take pride in what they do. Applejack must have put a lot of effort into the pie since she was looking a bit crestfallen at the fact that we aren't digging in. Agh! The pie looks and smells delicious, I don't want her to think I don't like it, but... what can I tell her? ‘Sorry Applejack, but I dunno how to use my hooves’. How weird would that sound? I look over at Applebloom and sit up straight as I study what she's doing with her pie. She has the piece carefully balanced on her hoof as she takes small bites, most likely savoring the deliciousness that I'm being separated from by anatomy.

My thought are interrupted when I hear Applejack. “If ya’ll don’t like apple pie, I don’t mind makin’ something else. I could whip up a sandwich or somethin’.”

“No, Applejack it’s fine! It smells awesome, it’s just... er...”

“How do we eat this thing?” Rigby blurts out the question.

Applejack looks startled at the question. “Uh, pardon? Are you askin’ me how to eat the pie?”

Aw crap, she probably thinks we're idiots!

Applebloom shakes a hoof. “Applejack, it ain’t that weird if ya think about it! Maybe where they’re from they eat pie differently and they’re just wonderin’ how to eat it without offendin’ anypony!”

Aw man. Applebloom's adorable and all, but that explanation made absolutely no sense. Still, it makes better sense than saying that Rigby and I were sent here by an Australian (English?) skeleton.

Applejack looks at us expectantly. “S’at so?”

“Uh... yeah. Where we come from we eat pie... um differently.”

Rigby seems to finally catch on and throw in his two cents. “Yeah! We didn’t want to offend anyone here in Horseville--”

No! “Ponyville.”

“Ponyville,” Rigby shoots me a glare.

“Well... ya’ll can eat the pie however ya like!” Applejack still looks a bit confused, but back to her chipper self.

I still don't know to eat it with hooves, but now at least we don't have to look like idiots. Okay, we’d probably still look like idiots, but at least we don't have to worry about Applejack calling us out on it. Rigby sighs in relief and into into his pie face first. Needless to say, pie got all over him; he actually looks like he did back when he was a raccoon.

While his plan isn't all that bad, the execution certainly is. I hesitantly open my mouth, but instead of getting it on my face I bite off a large portion of the corner, and let me tell you I am not disappointed. I'd even say it was worth the wait. Cinnamon, apples, sugar, every flavor of the pie seemed to seep out of it. And it was awesome.

Applejack meets my look with a nervous smile. “Well?”

Rigby raises his head and beams. “This is awesome!”

I can't hold back my laughter when I get an eyeful of his face. Pie was friggin’ everywhere! Applejack put a hoof to her mouth and snorted as she stifled a guffaw. Applebloom stood on her hind legs and put her front hoof on the table. She points her hoof at Rigby and grins “I like him!” She barely gets the claim out of her mouth before she pushes her own face into the pie, making some of the contents spew out from the sides.

“Applebloom!” I can tell Applejack is trying to be stern, but the smile on her face and giggle in her voice makes it impossible for anyone to take her seriously..

“Dude! At least have some manners!” I'm mad at him, but he's embarrassing me. I'm grinning, though, so even if he’d heard me he wouldn’t have listened anyway.

After the fiasco with the pie, Applejack sent Applebloom to the bathroom to wash up while I sent Rigby into the kitchen. I watch as Applejack grabs an old towel out of a small cupboard and gets to work wiping the pie off of the table. I feel kinda bad and look around for something I could do to help. After all, it had been my friend who started everything. It was difficult, but after using what felt like every muscle in my wings, I'm able to balance the three plates on them and take them into the kitchen. Applejack shoots me an uneasy look as I pass her.

“You don’t have to do that, sugarcube.” She says as she walks over to me and swiftly snatches the plates off of my wings.

“What? C’mon, Applejack. Let me do something to help, especially after you made us pie and Rigby got it all over the place.”

“Think nothin’ of it. Ya’ll are my guests, and Imma do everything I can to make you feel that way. This ain’t your home,” she pauses and looks at me as she puts the dishes into the sink. “These ain’t your chores.” She smiles as she walks back to the living room. “I appreciate the offer, I really do, but I ain’t gonna accept it.”

I’ll admit, that offended me a little. I'm just trying to help, but I could see that arguing wouldn’t get the stubborn mare to change her mind; if not irritate her. I shrug and roll my eyes. “Fine.”

A few moments of awkward silence pass before I feel Rigby push his way to stand next to me in the kitchen doorway. “Where to now?”

“What about that mare that Rainbow Dash mentioned, the one who lived in that fancy looking building?”

“Ya’ll mean Rarity?” Applejack grins as she turns to look at us. “I was about to head on down there myself. Applebloom’s got a dance comin’ up at school and she probably wants to look extra pretty for somepony who’s gonna be there...”

“I don’t wanna go to that thing!” Applebloom’s voice comes from the top of the stairs. “And whaddaya mean ‘somepony who’s gonna be there’?”

Applejack smirks without looking in the direction her sister’s voice had come from. “Why in the world not? Were you not talking with Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo yesterday about how,” She puts her hoof over her forehead in a dramatic pose. “‘Absolutely handome’ that colt at school was and how you ‘wish wish wish’ he would ask you to the dance?” She mimicked Applebloom’s voice with almost perfect accuracy.

“WHAT?” Applebloom’s voice booms and the sound of rushed hoofsteps flood my ears before a flustered looking Appleblom finds her way to the hand(hoof?)rail. She glares down at Applejack. “I don’t know what you’re talkin’ about.”

“Ain’t his name ‘Pipsqueak’ or somethin’?”

“N-no!”

“You’re a dirty liar.”

I gotta admit, holding in laughter at the back-and-forth jabs between the two siblings is really hard, and eventually the dam broke for both Rigby and I. After exchanging a quick glance with each other, the two of us erupt into fits of laughter. If everyone in town is like Applejack and Rainbow Dash, then I'm really looking forward to the party later.

Applejack chuckles as her sister races out of sight and turns to us. “Anyway, I can walk ya’ll to Rarity’s if ya like. Knowin’ her, though, that Unicorn’ll be neck deep in work.”

“Unicorn?” Rigby and I ask in unison. We’ve had some bad experiences with Unicorns, more than I’d like to admit. So far, everyone seems really nice, but I don't remember seeing any Unicorns around. Ugh, I could just see them now with their bad haircuts and scratchy voices.

“Um, yeah.” Applejack raises an eyebrow. “She’s a Unicorn.” She must have seen the look on our faces because she gives us an assuring smile before pointing to the picture I’d been looking at earlier. “Ya see the white Unicorn in that picture? That’s her.” She puts her hoof down. “She doesn’t look so bad, does she?”

“Well, no.” Rigby admits..

“Exactly. She’s a bit picky and can get on your nerves, but she means well. She’s always tryin’ to do stuff for everypony she meets. Then again, she ain’t the Element of Generosity for nothin’.”

The what of what? Before I can ask what she meant, she throws open her door, tips her hat to us, and walks out. “Ya’ll comin’ or not?”

“Yeah, we’re coming!” I call back to her. Rigby and I rush to the door before closing it behind us and following the orange mare down the winding path that lead to the town.

Author's Note

A big thanks to CometTail for proofreading!

Horses.

To say that Rarity’s house is beautiful would be an understatement, and I’m just talking about the outside. The many windows, the satin curtains that lay on the inside, and the unique carousel-esque design was just the cherry on top. Hey, don’t look at me like that. When you go to art school on your own accord, you learn how to appreciate and spot things like the perfectly sculpted marble details that are on the house.

Although Rigby doesn’t have my eye for art, he seems to be pretty impressed. His eyes are wide as he scans over every visible inch of the building. Applejack merely gives the building a glance as she trots up to the door and pushes her way inside, waving a hoof behind her as a signal that we should follow.

“Rares, ya here?” Applejack calls out. Her voice echoes in the beautifully lit studio. Mannequins with amazingly detailed clothes are scattered throughout the room. I can see a dimmed stage, most likely used for fashion shows, to the left. Although the main theme of the room seemed to be pure white with a hint of blue, the pink and yellow of the stage doesn't clash with it at all; if anything it compliments it.

“I’m in my inspiration parlor, darling! Could you come up, I’ve got my hooves full up here.” Rigby and I look toward a staircase that winds gracefully up to a second floor. Without an answer, Applejack looks to us before she begins climbing the stairs with Rigby and I on her heels.

Er… hooves.

We walk for a few moments down a long stretch of white tile. The eggshell blue walls are homes to portraits, one of them showing the little Unicorn fillY that I’d seen in the picture back at Applejack’s house.

“Hey, Rarity.” Applejack grins and announces her arrival with a greeting. Rigby goes in and takes a quick sweep of the room, his eyes wide.

“What’s up, dude?” I walk faster to catch up with him from where I stood looking at the picture. He shakes his head and smirks.

“This room is like the opposite of downstairs.”

I see what he means as I walk into the room. Downstairs was neat and clean, you could even say sterilized. This room? Cluttered, messy, disorganized. Mannequins and fabric are strewn about haphazardly, ribbons are draped over mirrors, gems lay scattered.

I hear a breathy chuckle come from ahead. “That’s because what you saw downstairs was the shop.” I look up and smile when I see her. She’d looked pretty in the pictures at Applejack’s house, but that wasn’t even comparable to how she looks in the flesh. A glossy white coat, a gracefully curled mane and tail, and big blue eyes that are framed by thick black lashes. Her flank is the home of three bright sapphires. On her nose is a small pair of red glasses.

There’s something weird though. Her horn is glowing a light blue color. And there are floating pieces of fabric everywhere. Rigby seems just as dumbfounded as I am.

Rarity, not noticing our blank stares, rolls her eyes. “This is my studio, where I create and inspire myself! One does not just think of the magnificent designs that you saw down in the shop!” She smirks at us over her glasses. “You may think of this room as a mess, but I see it as possible ideas!”

She turns to us, expecting understanding nods, only to see us staring at her. Well, Rigby’s staring at her. I’m staring at the stuff levitating next to her.

“Is something wrong?” She narrows her eyes and stares at Rigby and I.

“Your things are… floating?” I stutter out. This shouldn’t weird me out after all the things I’ve been through since working at the Park, but this one breaks through for some reason. From the looks on Applejack and Rarity’s faces, this seems to be a normal occurrence. Actually, now that I think about it, could the evil Unicorns use magic? That… ugh, slop they’d made me drink was really sparkly, could it have been magic? Did they ever use magic?

Rarity’s eyes dart around awkwardly before she answers. “Er, yes. Unicorns here make stuff… float.”

Crap. I must look like a total idiot. Okay, I’ve gotta remember these things. Unicorns can do magic, use hooves normally, learn to fly, stop being stupid.

Rarity delicately clears her throat before continuing, letting the levitating objects rest on the floor. “So! Applejack, care to introduce me to your friends?”

Applejack grins. “Sure thing. The tall blue one’s name is Mordecai and the little brown one is Rigby.”

“Am I really that tall?’

“Um, yeah dude.” Rigby scoffs and looks up at me. "You’re pretty high up there, you’re even taller than Skips.”

Huh. I always thought he was just really short.

“Well, it’s nice to meet both of you!” Rarity dips her head to us and smiles. “My name is Rarity, and I own this little place; although I assume you’ve already guessed that. What brings you two gentlemen here? I’ve not seen you in town before.”

“Well, the first horse we ran into here was Rainbow Dash, and she--” Rigby’s interrupted as he looks at Rarity.

“Horse?” Rarity’s mouth falls open.

“Oh no.” Applejack’s ears flatten.

“Horse?”

“Here it comes.” Applejack takes a tiny step back, signaling that I should do the same; which I do.

“We are not horses!” Rarity sticks her nose up haughtily. “Horses are tall and bony creatures! We are graceful!” She closes her eyes and puts a hoof to her chest. “We are civilized! We are ponies!”

Craaaaap.

“Honestly, how could you mistake us for horses! Rainbow Dash is no horse, she is a Pegasus! Horses do not have wings, nor do they have horns!”

Craaaaaaaaap.

“Of all of the worst things I could be called…”

Applejack rolls her eyes.

“This is the.”

“Rares, don’t--”

“Worst.”

“Rarity, please--”

“Possible.”

“Why you over-dramatic--”

“THING.”

“Rarity!” Applejack puts a hoof on the Unicorn’s shoulder. “Calm down, sugarcube. Why don’t you go downstairs and get yourself some water?”

“Yes… water… of course.” Rarity takes a breath and walks out of the room, Applejack hot on her trail. “Water…”

When the girls are gone I glare at Rigby and give him a wing smack on the back of the head.

“Ow! What was that for?”

“Horses? Really? HORSES?”

“Oh, don’t give me that!”

“Dude, they’re not horses!”

Rigby scoffs. “Yeah, I know that now.”

“Dude, do you realize how important it is for us to not act weird? What if they found out we aren’t from here? They could lock us up and do tests on us or something!”

“I doubt they’d do that.”

“Do you really?”

“Yeah.”

I know Rigby isn’t the brightest, but come on. Does he not remember all the times we’ve been tricked by seemingly nice people/Unicorns/giant bearded faces? Sure, Applejack and Rainbow were cool, Rarity didn’t seem so bad, Pinkie was…

“Just apologize to Rarity, okay?”

“Ugh. Okay, okay.”

“Are you okay, Rarity?” I ask as I walk into the kitchen. Rarity’s horn is lit, and in the grasp of her magic is a small, half filled glass of water. Applejack stands next to her.

She takes a sip of the water before smiling at me. “Oh, I’m fine. Thank you for asking, darling.” She clears her throat before turning to look at Rigby and I. “I do apologize for my behavior.” She sticks out her lip in a pouty fashion. “It was very unladylike of me.”

I glance down at Rigby before answering. “Not your fault.”

Rigby gives a small roll of his eyes before speaking. “I’m… sorry I called you all horses.”

Rarity grins at him. “Apology accepted!” She giggles a bit before the smile falls off of her face. She looks at me before giving a small jump of glee. “You know… I’ve been working on some stallion outfit ideas. Due to the lack of stallions in town and my not having any male mannequins, I’ve not been able to make any of them happen. Perhaps you two could help me a bit?”

Is she suggesting what I think?

“Of course, Mordecai is a bit tall and Rigby is a bit short, but I could make it work.”

Yes she is.

“What do you think? Could you model a bit for me? Please?” She sticks her lip out again and looks at us desperately.

i can’t say no.

I really should have said no.

What I meant to be just a 20 minute visit ended up turning into a two hour fashion show.

Rarity grunts as she tightens a strap over my body. “My, your wingspan is bigger than average.”

Yeah, it appears as if everything about me bigger than average. And don’t be getting any weird thoughts. That’s just creepy.

To my left, Rigby stands rigid in a completed black tux. I’ve only seen him dress up a few times, and seeing his new body in a tux is really weird. He almost looks civilized.

“Unfurl your wings for me?”

I do as she says and open my wings, grimacing as the fabric pulls against them. “Ow.”

“Oops! Sorry dear, I’m not used to working with large wings.” Rarity apologizes.

“It’s fine. It doesn’t hurt, it’s just really uncomfortable.” I chuckle.

“Well, I’ll fix that right up.” She lights up her horn again and soon enough I can feel the fabric loosen, allowing me to fully extend my wings. Throughout the whole situation, Rarity’s asked me to open and close my wings at least tens times. While it’s good practice for getting used to them, they’re gonna be really sore later.

“Aaand, done!” Rarity steps back and narrows her eyes before beaming at us. “You two look fabulous! Go on, turn around and look!”

I turn tentatively, not wanting to tear the suit. When I finally see myself, I’m pretty surprised. I mean, I can clean up nice and all, but I’ve never looked like this. Then again, I’ve never been a pony in a tuxedo before.

Rigby looks pleased with the results as well. “Wow, these are great!”

“You really think so? Oh, I was so afraid you wouldn’t like them!” I can see her behind me in the mirror. She puts a hoof to her chin before grinning. “Oh! Why don’t you take them?”

What? “Rarity, we can’t take your suits.” I look back at her.

“Yeah. I thought you wanted to keep them for your other customers.” Rigby frowns.

“Oh, pshaw! I needed you for the dimensions, which I wrote down! See?” She levitates a small notepad and smiles as she presents it to us. “Take them, free of charge! I insist!”

“Oh, you don’t have to--”

“I insist! Please!”

Once again, I can’t say no. I just don’t feel comfortable. I mean, she worked so hard to make them and then she’s just gonna let us take them? For free? But, she insists, and something tells me that when Rarity sets her mind to do something, she makes sure that it’s done.
“Okay.”

“Oh, good!” Rarity smiles and looks at Applejack. “Applejack, don’t they look dashing?”

“You did a mighty fine job there, Rares.” Applejack smiles at us.

“Now, I’ll just take these things off of you.” Rarity says as she lights up her horn.

“Wait,” Rigby grimaces. “You’re gonna take them off of us?”

“Well, yes.” Rarity grins.

“But we’ll be…”

I elbow Rigby. “Dude, we don’t normally wear clothes.” Rigby gives me a confused look. “Right?”

Rigby finally catches on. “Oh yeah! Eh heh heh.”

After undressing us, Rarity folds the clothes neatly and puts them in bags, giving each of us one. “I trust you’ll take good care of them?” she asks with a nervous glint in her eyes.

“Of course.” I assure her.

That seems to be enough, since Rarity immediately brightens. “Anyway, you said that you ran into Rainbow Dash?”

I nod. “Yeah, we did.”

“What’d ya think?” Applejack gives me a curious look.

“Well… she seems to be a bit…headstrong?’

Rarity gives a light chuckle. “Yes, that certainly sounds like her. She’s very headstrong. She can also be a bit offensive. If she ever insults you, just remember that she means well.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” I grin.

“We also met Pinkie Pie.” Rigby adds.

Unsurprisingly, both of them look up at this.

Rarity narrows her eyes. “Oh? And what did you think of her?”

“She seems okay. I didn’t get a chance to talk to her.” Rigby laughs. “Not really.”

I nod. “Yeah, she’s throwing us some sort of party.”

“Ah, I suspected.” Rarity says with a smile. “That pony will throw a party at the drop of a hat.”

“She really likes parties, huh?’ Rigby grins at Rarity.

“Yes, but I don’t believe that it’s all about parties. Her special talent is making ponies smile, and she’ll do anything to reach her goal.”

“Really?” I ask. I didn’t know getting someone to smile could be a talent. Then again, clowns and comedians would be kinda useless, so there’s really no reason for me to have said what I just said so I’m gonna shut up now.

“Oh yes! You know, she was once so focused on trying to get us to come to a party that she forgot it was her birthday?”

Applejack scoffs. “Whew boy, I remember that day. The poor girl went crazy trying to figure out why we were bein’ so secretive.”

Wow. This… really changed my perspective on Pinkie Pie. Before, I’d seen her as just a hyperactive pony, but now? After what Rarity and Applejack have been saying, I see her as being selfless and hyperactive.

My thoughts are interrupted when I hear Rarity let out a little sigh. “Applejack, are you sure this is the design you want for Apple Bloom’s dress?”

Rigby and I peek over Rarity’s shoulder to see the paper she’s levitating in front of her. It’s a drawing of a faceless filly, wearing a small dress with apple medallions stamped to it everywhere and ribbons hanging off in all directions. As bad as the fashion is, I have to say that the art itself isn’t bad.

Applejack frowns. “What’s wrong with it?”

“Well, there’s…” Rarity’s eyes scan the paper a thousand times over before she begins to speak. “It’s just so… unorganized and… um.” She looks up at Applejack, whose expression hasn’t changed from being curious.

Applejack’s eyes widen and then she nods. “Oh, I see. You’re right, sugarcube.” She gives a breathy chuckle and waves her hoof dismissively. “You’re the expert here, do what you think is right.”

Oh, okay.” Rarity giggles and sets the paper on a nearby desk. “I’ll get started. And when does she need it by?”

“Next Friday.” Applejack frowns. “Is that enough time for ya?”

“Oh, Applejack! It’s more than enough time!”

As I watch the two talking, I find myself surprised by how well they’re interacting. While Applejack is a rough and tumble farmer, Rarity is dainty and ladylike, however this doesn’t seem to bother them. The way they’re acting towards each other, you’d think they aren’t different at all.

And who knows? Maybe they’re not.

“Dude, where do we go now?” Rigby comes up behind me.

“I don’t know. Isn’t there a treehouse nearby that Rainbow Dash pointed to?”

“Yeah, but she said that some science nerd lives there.”

Applejack, having heard us, looks at Rigby. “Twi’s not a science nerd, she’s just really organized and…” Applejack trails off, as if she’s searching for the right word.

“Studious!” Rarity adds.

“Yeah, that.” Applejack nods.

Ohhhh, she’s one of those kinds of peop--ponies.

“Twilight would definitely welcome a couple of visitors, as long as she isn’t busy with some homework that the Princess gives her.”

Wait, what? Princess? I’m about to ask them about the Princess, but I assume that whoever she is, everyone must know who she is, and asking about her would make me even more peculiar than I already am. So, i keep my mouth shut, silently begging Rigby to do the same. Thankfully, the gears in Rigby’s brain seemed to be chugging hard enough to give him some common sense, because not a word escaped his mouth.

“Just be careful around Spike, he can be very protective over Twilight.” Rarity laughs.

“Spike? Is that a dog?” I didn’t think ponies could have pets, but I’ve been wrong a lot today.

“No-ho-ho.” Applejack shakes her head. “He’s a dragon.”

“A DRAGON?” Rigby yells.

Applejack grimmaces. “Calm down now, Rigby. He’s just little dragon, nothin’ harmful about him. Ya’ll should be okay.”

So ponies can keep dragons as pets. Nice. Just when I think this world is starting to make sense, then BAM.

Oh well. TO TWILIGHT’S TREEHOUSE THINGY!