A Tale of Two Doctors

After returning to the TARDIS, John Smith could be seen waiting inside leaning against one of the coral walls with his arms crossed, wearing a bored expression.

“Still think this was a good idea?” he grumbled.

“They just need time…that attack was less than a year ago, many people nearly lost their loved ones in that attack and for many the pain is still fresh in their minds and Twilight has a VERY strong bond with her brother…can you honestly blame them for having suspicions?” he asked.

“No,” he sighed. “But, how can I get them to trust me?”

“Well…you could probably start by giving a helping hand to those around town and show them your friendly nature-I’m really proud of you for staying calm under pressure, by the way-and the rest is like I said before; let time heal the rest of their wounds.”

“Huh…” he seemed to mull this over for a while before returning his gaze to The Doctor.

“But, then why are YOU so eager to help me?” he asked suspiciously.

“Because I’m The Doctor; helping others is in the job description.” He replied simply.

However, a second glance at the Changeling proved that he found it to be an unsatisfactory answer.

“Fine,” he sighed. “I suppose you deserve to know.”

“Know what?” he prompted.

The Doctor rested his fore hooves on the console before him, pressing down on it with considerable pressure to support himself as he leaned over it.

The console itself groaned in protest at the obscene amount of wait that was being forced onto it.

Watching this, John Smith could imagine that if he had fingers or claws; The Doctor would also be gripping it tightly.

“There was a time in my life…a very dark time.”

He hung his head so that John Smith couldn’t see his facial expression while he spoke.

“A war broke out between my fellow Time Lords and a race called the Daleks; they were beings that encased themselves in metallic shells and had every emotion except hate removed from them they only wanted two things; to expand the Dalek Empire and to exterminate every non-Dalek life form in the universe.”

“And that’s what the war was about?” John Smith asked, intrigued.

“Yes…The ‘Last Great Time War’” The Doctor replied.

“But…you’re alive here now so doesn’t the mean you won?” he asked hesitantly.

“No, we lost…everyone lost; the Daleks, the Time Lords, Gallifrey, and myself.”

“I don’t understand.”

“There was no doubt in anyone’s mind that the Daleks needed to be stopped, but I also began to see how the majority of my fellow Time Lords were becoming just as monstrous…so I locked them into the Time War.” The Doctor explained.

“If you’re here now, then how did you lose?”

“Because while some may have seen it as my greatest victory, for me it will always be my greatest failure; I couldn’t save any of them…I tried everything…”

With that last bit he seemed to be talking to himself rather than the Changeling.

He then seemed to straighten up.

“And that’s why I’m going to do everything in power to help you; I don’t want to see another species ending up the same way and I don’t want ever want anyone to be in that position if I can help it.”

“But, wait…why didn’t you bring any of this up back in the library?”

“Because it’s not just a failure for me…it’s like a broken promise; my real name isn’t ‘The Doctor’ obviously, it’s a moniker I’d chosen because it meant ‘healer’ someone who protects and takes care of those who can’t do it for themselves…that point of my life and everything I did in it disgraced the name and all it stands for…at that point in my life I was ‘The Doctor’ in name only.”

“So you didn’t mention if because it felt like you failed?” John Smith asked quizzically.

“No,” he sighed. “It’s more complicated than that; sometimes I feel like a monster, like I didn’t have the right to do what I did…because no one SHOULD have the right to do something like that…it haunts my every waking moment.”

“So nobody else knows about this?”

“Celestia and Luna know, but that’s about it…they were both very understanding about it…Luna in particular knew what it was like to go through a dark chapter in your life that you’re not particularly proud of and would rather keep buried.”

“So why haven’t you told Twilight and Rainbow Dash or anyone else about this, aren’t they your friends?” John Smith challenged.

“They are,” he replied glumly. “And that’s why I can never tell them.”

“Huh?”

“Because I’m afraid that if I tell them who I really am…they will no longer want to have anything to do with me…that they will see me as the monster I really am and I wouldn’t blame them.”

“But?”

“But, I’ve travelled through time and space for so long picking up companions to travel with and try to ward off my loneliness-even if only for a little while-but, in they end they’d leave or some of them would even die…and it would break my heart.”

“Just how many of these companions have you had?” John Smith asked curiously.

“At least a few dozen, but my point is that my heart has broken so many times…and I am so very, very old…I’m not sure how many more I’ll be able to survive.”

“So you’re afraid.” He concluded.

“Yes, I am very afraid…of being alone again.”

“You still tried to do the right thing and even if it didn’t exactly turn out the way you wanted it-shouldn’t your intentions be what count?”

“And that justifies killing my own people?” The Doctor shot back.

He hung his head again and sighed.

“Maybe I’ll muster up the courage to tell them one day…but, for now I have no idea how I’d break it to them and ponies like Rainbow Dash are only just beginning to trust me-you saw how impulsive she is-how do you think she’d react if I just strolled back in there and dropped a bombshell like that?”

“I see your point.” John Smith conceded.

“So what’s the plan, then?”

“We return to the Changeling hive and speak with Queen Chrysalis.”

“What!?” he shrieked. “Why? Do you have any idea how stubborn she is? She’ll never listen to you!”

“Besides,” he grumbled. “She probably still wants my head…”

“I know.” The Doctor replied. “But, I still have to try…besides, she hates me too…probably even more, but that will be to our benefit; she’ll want to execute us publicly and then we will reveal what she told you after the siege on Canterlot for the rest of the Changelings to hear.”

“And then?”

“If a few of them listen they may turn on Chrysalis for manipulating them.”

“What if none of them listen?” he asked.

“Then we will probably be executed.” The Doctor replied simply.

“Doctor, that’s a terrible plan!” John Smith exclaimed.

“Do you have a better one?”

“No…”

“Well, it’s the only one I’ve got so if you still want to go through with this we have to leave now.”