June 2013 T.W.G. submissions
-Akumokagetsu
-Prompt 5) You have to make a confession to Rarity.
-Title: And It Was Messy
“Look, Rarity, there’s something I’ve got to tell you.”
“Yes, dear?” Rarity replied patiently, sipping at her early morning honeysuckle tea as the light filtered in through the window. “I gathered as much when you began pummeling my front door with big, meaty paws.”
“… What did you say about my hands, horse?”
“Big. Meaty. Paws!”
I waved her off, trying to focus on the task at hand. “Forget it; look, there’s something I’ve got to get off my chest.”
“Yes, dear?” she asked, leaning forward.
I leaned in closely, almost with a whisper. “Well, it’s kind of private.”
“How so, darling?” she asked curiously, cocking an eyebrow.
“I mean, it could cause a lot of trouble if this kind of thing ever leaked out.” Rarity could tell there was something afoot (ahoof?), probably from the mischievous glint in my eyes.
“Well, dear, I promise not to tell anypony about it,” she said, placing a hoof solemnly over her heart.
“Pinkie Promise?” I asked, extending a pinkie.
“Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye.”
“Oh, good,” I said with a sigh of relief, wiping the sweat off my brow. “I kind of killed Spike.”
“What!?” Rarity shrieked in panic, dropping her teacup to the floor with a shatter.
“Chill, chill! Nopony else knows; I just need your help a little.”
“Oh, I am not helping you move any bodies!” she insisted, backing away a little. If her eyebrows went any further up her head, they’d fly right through her violet mane.
“No, no, it’s real simple, see?” I proclaimed, extracting a small flipbook filled with stick figures to demonstrate. “You make a Spike dummy out of fabric and crap, distract the others using your horn-magic-thingy to make him dance like a jackass, and I take care of the body! Easy peasy!”
“Easy peasy?!” Rarity cried, a little understandably upset. “How did you even kill Spike?”
At that moment, Rarity’s front door burst open, revealing a ragged looking Twilight Sparkle.
“Rarity, have you seen Spike?”
She froze, eyes widening in shock. “Er… no, dear. I haven’t seen Spike.” It was technically the truth.
“He’s been missing all morning! He just kept saying something about loaning a chainsaw for some babysitting job he’d gotten!”
Rarity’s stomach nearly dropped out in fear, her mind conjuring up horrid images of what could have possibly transpired. The hairless ape in front of her only gave a wide, toothy grin, which wasn’t helping matters.
“I’m just so worried about him, and I can’t find him anywhere; I’d be devastated if anything happened to him!” Twilight wailed, and I spoke up ‘helpfully’.
“Hey, Twilight, I’ve got something to tell you-“
“No! No, he doesn’t!” Rarity yelped, clapping a hoof over my mouth.
“He – he doesn’t?”
“He doesn’t!”
“Fff ffl fmmf.”
“Hang on, didn’t you say you had something to tell Rarity before you left, too?” Twilight asked me suddenly, glaring at me. Rarity removed her trembling hoof, awaiting the terrible news that she knew was about to come.
“Oh, hey, there you are Twi.” Spike said as he entered, juggling a half-eaten apple. “Wassup, Rarity?”
“Yeah,” I answered Twilight with a wicked grin as I turned to Rarity. “I lied.”
~~~
Emerald Flight
Pinkie is staring at you. Why?
Eatagerbilferbreakfast
You look across the table at her and sigh. "What is it now, Pinkie?"
"Is your nose heterosexual?"
"Twice," you reply, not understanding the question.
Fluttershy materializes on the table, then quietly steps down. "I heard that Pinkie was staring at people again. I had to see it," she explained so quietly you couldn't hear her. But you knew what she meant.
Pinkie continues shooting you daggers with her eyes. It starts to hurt because you think they're made of silver, which you're allergic to because you're Norwegian, and you time-cough. Everything stops around you as atoms lock in place and you can finally take a five-second break.
But before long, the torture starts again. Those disturbingly blue eyes staring into the depths of your soul. You begin to cry. "Pinkie, why are you doing this for and?" you ask, dropping your English on the floor for a second before reaching over to pick it up.
"I'm trying to see your large intestine. I heard it looks like a worm."
Then your flesh begins to dematerialize, and, through the melting patches of your skin, a large earthworm breaks out. Pinkie smiles. "There it is," she said, turning away from you only to stare at Fluttershy, who promptly dematerializes.
It's been three days. Pinkie has taken control of most of Equestria, except for the lucky few who exist in the space between spaces, such as Fluttershy. However, as the cave of space-blinkers shuffles with its daily survival routine, Fluttershy begins to get a few odd looks and angry states. She knows something everypony else does not.
Nopony will ever know, though, because Pinkie breaks the laws of physics like they're Popsicle sticks. She existences into the cave, increases her heat signature to 12000 degrees Fahrenheit, and unexistences to continue her bloody rule.
Hope for ponykind is lost.
~~~
Name: Chrono_Ryono
Prompt: "You have to make a confession to Rarity."
Title: All the good ones are...
Taking one of those deep breaths that were meant to calm a pony down (but never did), I rose a hesitant hoof and rapped on the door a few times. When met with no response, I tried again... and again... before remembering it was a shop and, as a customer, I had every right and privilege to just walk in.
Doing so, my eyes were drawn to the distinctive figure of Rarity - Carousel Boutique's most illustrious owner. She immediately dropped what she was doing - an action I normally wouldn't condone when scissors were involved - to beckon me in.
I did a quick recon, confirming there were no other customers. Excellent.
"Thanks for coming," she said in a voice I'd wager would make most stallions weak in the knees. Whether she knew it or not, her every spoken word had a sultry kind of... I dunno, provocative underline to it? "I'm sorry this is short notice, dear, but I just couldn't keep this to myself any longer."
Wonderful. I rolled my mind's eye. Confessions were bad enough; making them two-way was just a recipe for shenanigans and broken hearts. Still, I'd put this off for too long already; this had to end before it began.
She ushered me to a private room; one I immediately knew wasn't for customers, as it was littered with every manner of magazine from filly's romance novels (not that grown mares would admit that) to stallion's health and diet guides. I smirked both in amusement and bemusement as I noticed the particularly raunchy Colt Cuddler: Issue #7.
I took a seat on the closer couch, and threw back a mouthful of cold vanilla coffee, waving off her suggestion of a heating spell. I had too much on my mind to care about such trivial things. Whatever we were about to exchange would be the true test of our fledgling friendship...
We'd met at the Work Horse - or as many informally called it, the Ponyville Gym. I was there working my badass legs, while I assumed a mare with a figure like hers was there to scope out some sexy stallion flank. We struck up a conversation that left me feeling stupid and more than a little sexist; after all, a figure like hers was also the product of hard work, not a "this mare is out of your league" badge of honor.
"How are you, darling?" she asked, taking a seat opposite me on the other couch. I noticed her fidgeting a little, and like the gentlecolt I am, I decided to let her voice her concerns first.
"I'm good, Rarity. It's always a pleasure to spend time with you. May I ask what's on your mind?"
She looked away, losing her usual facade of refined dignity. "I... well, you see... Hearts and Hooves Day is coming up..."
No. Please, no...
"And I was wondering if..."
No. No. No. Can't hear her, not listening, yadda yadda. Not letting it end this way-
"Would you be my special somepony?"
No! I knew it. I freaking knew it. I should have gotten this off my chest a week ago, but I'd ignored the signs. Of all the worst things that could happen, this was the worst possible... ugh.
"Rarity," I said directly, flashing the best smile I could. Great. What I had to say was hard enough to begin with, and after that... I was going to come across as the world's biggest asshole. "I'm flattered, and I'm sure the stallion that spends his life with you is the luckiest guy alive. But the truth is..."
I took a deep breath, and it didn't calm me down one bit.
"... I'm gay."
~~~
Name: Perception Filter
Prompt: Ditzy Doo gives you a package with no address. What's inside of it?
Title: We need to go deeper
It was me third day in ponyville. Honestly, you’d think that the flashing green lights disappearing objects would’ve been an indicator that things were being teleported, but I didn’t really pay attention. That was, until I wound up here. I honestly didn’t know what happened. Maybe it was some sort of resonance cascade like from Half-Life. It would’ve been cooler if—
“Got a package for you!” came a voice from above, knocking me out of my thinking. I looked up to see Ditzy Doo flying overhead, swooping down towards you holding a large box. I waited until she stopped before I spoke.
“What is it?” I asked, confused. It was only my third day here, why would I have a package.
“It’s a box!” she replied cheerily.
“No, really. I never would’ve guessed,” I deadpanned.
“Yeah, it is! Anyway, here you go!” She handed me the package and flew away. I shook it a bit, but didn’t hear anything. I looked all over, but it was completely unmarked. Shrugging, I pulled out my pocket knife and slit the tape going across it. Opening the flaps, I was confronted.... with another box.
I bit my lip, and stopped to think about the situation.
I got handed a package by Ditzy Doo, a mailmare, after ending up in Equestria after the resonance cascade-eque thing.
Oh, what the hell. Might as well see how deep the rabbit hole goes.
I slit open the next box and opened it to see another box.
“Well this is just counterproductive,” I said, taking both boxes out of their respective larger boxes. I opened the next box, and inside that, was another box. I opened the next one, and another box appeared. By this time, the box was only about a foot big. I opened that one, expecting there to be another box, but instead there was a note.
It read: “And all was Nicholas Cage, and nothing hurt.”
I was about to question what it meant, but then everything was Nicholas Cage. And nothing hurt.
~~~
Name- Dragonfire2lm
Prompt- Pinkie is starring at you, why?
Title- God damn it Pinkie!
I looked up from my bowl of weetbix, having zoned out for a moment. Across from me was Pinkie Pie, her enormous plate of pancakes drowned in syrup had barely been touched and the blasted pony was still staring at me.
She did so the first day I arrived on his god forsaken rock and she’s done so every day since.
“Pinkie…” I deadpanned.
“Yeah Df?” the cheerful pony chirped.
“What in Equestria’s name are you doing?”
“I dunno, what are you doing?”
“God damn it Pinkie…”
I continued eating my breakfast in silence trying my hardest not to look up at the mare staring at me like I’m a zoo exhibit, but I suppose when you’re a hairless ape with a vision impairment in a world of multi-coloured ponies I expected a few curious glances and maybe a foal or two asking that God damned annoying question.
What’s wrong with your eye?
I shrugged the thought off and continued the rest of my morning rituals, finish breakfast, get dressed and figure out what the hell I’d be doing for the rest of the day.
Did I mention Pinkie had followed me and kept staring at me the entire freaking time!
“Pinkie, for the last time what are you doing?”
“What do you mean?”
“You’ve been staring at me even since I first met you….HOW THE HELL HAVE YOU NOT NOTICED!?".
“I have? That’s pretty silly isn’t it?”.
“God damn it Pinkie…”
I tried to brush it off as Pinkie being Pinkie but it was starting to get really creepy, no matter where I went, what I was doing or who I was with the pink party pony would pop up and just stare.
I was starting to lose sleep over it. Of course given the fact that demon-spawn the town called Equestria’s best party pony watched me until the girl fell asleep herself made my life a living hell.
As I headed out the door to head to the library for the latest batch of dragonology books I heard the unmistakable ‘sproing’ of Pinkie’s bouncing as she followed me down the street.
“Don’t you have somewhere else to be?” I asked.
“Nope!” Pinkie replied as enthusiastically as ever.
I sighed and continued walking.
“God damn it Pinkie…” I muttered under my breath.
Reading no longer appealed to me so I tried to walk off my irritation. Since this morning I’d gotten a migraine from the annoying, infuriating sound of the pink mare’s bouncing.
That night was spent the same as all the others; hiding under the blankets until the sound of the pony-from-hell’s snoring filled the room, then sneak out to sleep on the couch.
I looked up from my bowl of weetbix, having zoned out for a moment. Across from me was Pinkie Pie, her enormous plate of pancakes drowned in syrup had barely been touched and the blasted pony was still staring at me.
She did so the first day I arrived on his god forsaken rock and she’s done so every day since.
“Pinkie…” I deadpanned.
“Yeah Df?” the cheerful pony chirped.
“What in Equestria’s name are you doing?”.
“I dunno, what are you doing?”.
“God damn it Pinkie…”
“Hey Dragonfire?”
“What?”
“What’s wrong with your eye?”
“I was born that way…”
God damn it Pinkie….
~~~
Name: TimeLord_Whooves
Prompt: Dittzy Doo gives you a package with no address. What's inside of it?
Title: The Box
Just another summer day, sitting in my living room, reading the morning paper, as usual. I notice an article.
Report reads, ‘Massive Mail Mix Up… Apparently there has been a major fluke with the mail the last couple of days, reports of missing, incorrectly addressed, incorrectly delivered, and opened mail have been coming in. When asked, the CEO of Equestria Shipping and Freight stated, “We have no idea why mail and packages are showing up, or not showing up, in these conditions. We have been unable to locate our mailmare, Dittzy Doo, who has been assigned these deliveries, we don’t even know how she’s getting the most recent assignments as nopony has seen her for the last day or so.”
Missing and wrongly delivered mail huh?... I’m glad I haven’t been sending an-
BOOOOM! CRASH! Thud.
What in the hay was that?
I walked over to my front door to find that I had no front door anymore. Dittzy was standing outside waving at me, holding under her like a surfboard. She shouted, “Special delivery!” before flying off, riding clouds like they were waves.
I picked up the box and examined it carefully, hopefully I could get it to its rightful recipient… No address… Well this is strange then…
I looked at every side of the box, looking for any indication of who it was intended for or who had sent it. The only thing I found however was the deep impression of a hoofmark on one the sides… Apparently she had kicked it into my door to knock it off of its hinges.
“Hey, what was that about?”
I looked up to find Octavia standing in my now empty doorway.
“Couldn’t say… Things have just been crazy today.” I said, shaking my head.
“Well… What’s in the box then?” she asked as she stepped closer to me.
“I don’t know, I don’t even know if it’s really for me, there’s no address…”
“Hmm, well then open it and find out what it is, maybe that will tell you who it’s meant for.”
I raised my eyebrow at her. She responded with an encouraging smile. I sighed and turned the box over to the end marked, “This side up.”
Before I could do anything however, somepony from outside my door suddenly shouted, pulling mine and Tavi’s attention away from the box.
“Hey look everypony. His door’s gone, he can’t stop us from getting inside!”
Suddenly there was a rumbling and a massive surge of ponies made its way into my house,
causing me to be trampled and Tavi to jump out of the way and press herself up against the wall just in time to avoid the waves of ponies now entering and exiting my house. I could hear ponies arguing, yelling and haggling over things but I was stuck to the floor due to the continuous waves of ponies ransacking my house. Needless to say, I was powerless to stop them.
When they all finally left, I got up and looked around. My walls were bare, leaving behind only the clean squares of wall from where I had my pictures hanging, and my rooms completely decimated. They had even taken my carpet and the kitchen sink! I sat there, staring in horror at my house.
“Uh… Well I saved your box…” Tavi said sheepishly.
I looked at it for a second and tore the cardboard apart. Inside was a wooden box with a small piece of paper that read, “Thanks for the door, here’s a box as consolation. :D”
~~~
name: Flaris
prompt: pinkie pie is staring at you (and some more too but that's the main one.)
title: a Human, two Ponies and a Pinkie pie
She was staring at me, I could feel it. why did she have to stare so much? especially there, I mean it can't be that unusual can it? This can't be an isolated event, can it?
“Its so big.” she said. finally something, but why was she still staring, other ponies are staring as well now. why me? why do I have to be the person that things like this happen to? okay keep calm how did this all start anyway? Wait it was at Sofa and Quills wasn't it.
I was putting the quills in the inkwells for quill, fingers are good for that kind of thing, when I heard the chime of the bell. I was the only one here since Quill and Sofa were late, something they had started to do a lot since they had started living together, probably sleeping together too. but it wasn't their usual time of entrance. No this had to be a customer, either that or Derpy. She did drop in a lot. Weather it was to share a muffin or deliver some mail, or maybe it was Colgate coming to force a toothbrush into my mouth for leaving home without brushing twice, even if she was one of my best friends she was too protective of my teeth. Then again maybe its what I deserve for living with a dentist. I went back to the counter suspecting a toothbrush or a muffin. I was half right. Derpy was there and she was holding a package smiling, with what looked like an entire muffin stuffed into her mouth “Package for Quill or Sofa?” I asked.
“You.” She mumbled through her mouth as she handed me the package, As I signed I wondered what it could have been. I was about to ask as Derpy flew out the door letting in a smiling Quill.
“What you got there Magnet? A package for me?” Quill took the package and ripped into it.
“OI Derpy said it was for me.”
“I'll say how would I fit into scuba gear like this?” I quickly took the package off Quill and checked it over. Rarity actually did it.
“I'm gonna go test this out kay Quill? I've done most of the work already so I'm taking a break.”
But why were there sharks in the lake. Why were sharks even in Equestria. Pinkie’s staring didn't make it any easier. I felt sick just looking at me shredded leg. Thankfully Rarity’s scuba gear was thicker than it looked, and sharks were weird here. At least I got a little souvenir for my pain. Maybe i'd get Colgate to brush it before I make a necklace out of it. Pinkie was still staring. “Pinkie can you stop looking its making me uncomfortable.”
“I'm sorry. But i've never seen a shark bite before. And how are you gonna tell Rarity you ruined her gift?”
“Oh crap, wait Pinkie why are you even here?”
“I wanted to look at the bite.”
“Great.” I looked out the window and saw a worried looking Colgate pressed up against the glass. holding a toothbrush. Happy birthday to me.
~~~
Name: destinedjagold
Prompt: “5) You have to make a confession to Rarity.”
Title: “My First Few Days In Equestria”
I am already starting to like this world, despite being the only human here on Equestria. The ponies here are really friendly, and helpful as well! When they first found me — and by ‘they’, I mean the Elements of Harmony — they helped me to fit in, after we found out that I can no longer return to my world.
It saddened me, of course, but these six ponies helped me a lot: Twilight allowing me to stay in her guest bedroom, Rainbow Dash teaching me how to be confident and cool to accept my new life, Fluttershy for teaching me about the animals and plant life, Pinkie Pie for throwing me a welcoming party, Applejack for hiring me so I could earn money.
And Rarity for, uh, providing me some new clothes. As the Element of Generosity, I should be really thankful for her offering me new clothes, but as I sigh for a millionth time while standing here, motionless, as she began designing some clothes, it was probably time for me to confess something to her.
Calling her attention, she stopped working on my seventh new dress and regarded me with a lovely smile. “Yes darling?”
I sigh yet again. I just hope she won't take this personally. “It is really nice of you to give me new clothes, however...” I trail off as my eyes fall on the sparkling-new clothes on the sofa.
“Is something wrong, dear?” Her question carries a tone of worry.
And I sigh again as I nod. “Rarity, please don't take this personally, but uh, I'm a guy—a male specie. I can't, well, I could, but the clothes you made for me are too girly!”
She gave me a blink, and then her head tilts to the side. “You are a male?”
I love to give myself a facepalm right there and then, if only the needles aren't holding the pieces of clothing around my body. I am simply glad that there aren't any other humans around. It'll take ages for this moment to die down...
~~~
Name: Vadram
Prompt: 5) You have a confession to make to Rarity
Title: All mares are crazy
“Shout I tell her? Should I? Maybe I shouldn’t Maybe I should...”
I keep asking myself these questions for the last hour as I walked around Carousel Boutique trying to figure out whether I should, or shouldn’t tell her. It’s been eating at me for almost a week now, I can’t sleep at nights, and when I finally manage to go to sleep I wake up in the middle of the night only thinking about it.
“Shout I tell her? Should I? Maybe I shouldn’t Maybe I should...”
I don’t know how long I will be able to keep on living like this.
I have been living in Ponyville for a few months by now and I had the fortune of getting to know most of the townsfolk, but one mare managed to catch my eye.
She was a white unicorn with a elegant purple mane, and the most gorgeous blue eyes I ever had the pleasure of seeing, and a week ago we finally went to dinner...
It was a lovely late summer night, the autumn cold was still far away, the sky was clear, the tree leaves are shades of golden and reds, Luna’s night sky was as beautiful as ever, and we, Rarity and I, were enjoying a lovely dinner at the finest restaurant in Ponyville. The only restaurant in Ponyville, but I digress...
The dinner was lovely, the company was pleasant, and I enjoyed every moment of it, only one thing could have me it perfect. And even since then I wanted to tell her, I wanted to tell her right there and then, but I couldn’t, and it has been haunting me ever since.
“Shout I tell her? Should I? Maybe I shouldn’t Maybe I should...”
I just didn’t know what to do. I really wanted to tell her. From the bottom of my heart. But... I was afraid of how she would react. I cared too much for her, for us, for me, to tell her that what I wanted to.
“Oh Celestia why does it have to be so hard?!” I unwillingly shouted.
I took a deep breath, and with my heart beating like crazy, I knocked on the door.
“I will!”
“Yes?” Rarity asked making her way to the door.
All my determination, all my willpower ran out when I heard her voice.
She opened the door and saw those two gorgeous eyes looking at me.
“Hello darling,” she greeted me.
My muscles tensed, my heart was beating like crazy, I was sweating, my head was hurting, my mouth was dry, every single part of me screamed “ABORT! ABORT! RUN YOU FOOL, RUN!” But my mind was made up, I was going to go through with it.
“Rarity...” I tried to get it out all at once but struggled with each word.
“Yes?” she asked me.
“Do you remember the day we went to diner?” I asked trying to postpone the inevitable.
“Yes?”
“Since that day there was something I wanted to tell you...”
“Yes?”
“Something that kept me awake every night since then...”
“Yes?”
“Rarity...”
“Yes?”
“The dress you wore that day makes your rump look huge.”
And since that day,
I've walked this way. It hurt to sit down.
~~~
Name: Silent Sir 224
Prompt: You have a Confession to make to Rarity
Title: First comes love, then comes marriage...
Okay, you can do this... probably. I steeled myself enough to knock on the door, how this was going to happen I still can't figure out.
She opened the door, "Oh hello Dusk, what can I do for you today?"
Okay, here goes nothing. "I need to discuss something with you, in private."
"Oh really? Well then by all means please come in." Okay, I got her attention, now how do I say this without her wanting to butcher me? "So what is that you wanted to talk about? Your marriage with Fluttershy?"
"Well, kind of, I have to tell you something. But you have to promise you won't be mad at me."
"Okay, after everything I've done since you've moved here, I think I will understand."
Now or never! "Okay... I stole your measuring tape!" Wait, what did I just say? Screw it, just roll with it.
"You? You were the one who stole it?!"
"Yes, I just wanted to get some measurements for a shelf in the cottage. You were busy, so I just took it. I'm a terrible pony for not telling you!"
"Dusk, get out."
"What?"
"If you're calling yourself a terrible pony, you obviously need to go clear your head."
"But I tool something of yours without permission."
"Dusk, it's measuring tape. Something I started stocking extras of after I had a little drama moment over it some time ago."
"So, you're not mad?"
"No Dusk, I'm not.
"Phew, that's a relief."
"Now, is that all you came to tell me about?"
"Oh right, I think Fluttershy might be pregnant." Whoops, slip of the tongue!
"Wait, WHAT?!"
"Yeah, she's showing a couple signs of it already."
"..."
"Rarity?"
"..."
"You okay?"
"Dusk, you have all of your medical expenses paid off right?"
"Yeah..."
"Good, with a foal on the way, you need to start saving."
"Rarity, what are you doing?"
"Oh, don't worry, this will only hurt for a week!" She's lunging at me! Think, think, think!
ZAP!
"Oh no, oh no. Rarity, are you okay? I didn't mean to shock you I'm sorry! Rarity?" ...Okay, she's still breathing. She's fine, I'll just leave a note. At least, that went slightly better than I expected.
~~~
Name: Dvan56
Prompt: Pinkie Pie is staring at you. Why?
Title: Saving Tom
I was called to this realm to save a rock, odd I know. Now I wish I hadn't.
“Pinkie” I said slowly backing away from the pink pony. Her normally curly mane was now straight. She was staring me down, her eyes full of fire. No seriously they were on fire, the flames level with the tip of her ears.
“You” she said in an evil low voice as she approached.
“Pinkie stop! He didn't mean it!” I heard a pony say, I believe it was Rarity but I could be wrong. All my attention was on the livid mare in front of me.
“Pinkie, I didn't know. I was just trying to get home. Had I known I wou-”
“Zip it!” she yelled raising her hoof.
“Do you know how long, human? Do you have any idea how long I have been looking for him! Well do you!?” She shouted.
“No but..”
“BUT NOTHING!!!!”
The power behind her voice knocked me over. I was now on the ground crawling on my back trying to get away from Pinkie. She however keep approaching in at a steady pace.
“That party was fifteen years in the making. FIFTEEN YEARS!!!” The ground now started to crack with her footsteps.
“Fifteen years I have been looking for that run away rock! I thought I had him after Discord showed up four years ago. But Discord made sure he got away.”
Another ground shattering step was taken towards me.
“Then yesterday, I found him. The party was set. AND THEN YOU SHOWED UP!”
Another step, she was now almost on top of me.
“You show up. Almost out of thin air. And you stole him away from his party.”
One last step she was not on top of me. Her eyes just inches away from mine.
“And all because you wanted to go back home. Not only did you take away my the guest of honor but you insulted me by wanted to leave before your party!”
“Pinkie please don't do this.” I cried.
She was silent but still staring me down.
Then the fire in Pinkies eyes died. Her face was no longer full of anger but now she was trying her hardest not to burst out laughing. It didn't last long before she was on the floor laughing hysterically. Her mane made a puff sound and it became curly again.
“O Discord was right! Scaring a brony &^%$%#@ is funny!”
~~~
Name: piefan
Prompt: 4) Discuss your employment at Sofa and Quill's shop as a Human in Equestria
Title: Sofas and Quills: Never sell them
Three ponies - the ‘Cutie Mark Crusaders’ charged into the shop, breaking the door in the process.
“What the-” I cursed loudly. “I just fixed that from the last time you came! How do you even manage to break wood without using anything?”
The greenish-yellow one, whose name was Apple Blossom or something like that answered.
“I don’t know. We just wanna borrow something!”
“You’ve borrowed 12 things in the last 6 months, and you broke 9 of them!” I said.
The white one spoke. “But it was Rarity who destroyed 3 of those quills!”
“And what about the other 9?”
“While practicing awesome tricks, Rainbow Dash accidentally--” Before the orange one finished her sentence, I interrupted her.
“Why was she using quills for practice?”
The pegasus shrugged. I facepalmed so hard that day.
Davenport, the only pony whose name I had memorized so far, came out of the toilet.
“What took you so long?” I complained. “I’ve been handling the shop alone - fixing things, cleaning, tending to the customers, for 2 hours!”
He laughed. “Well, how long did you think reading a newspaper would take? That newspaper of yours is really interesting! Humans are very fascinating.”
I, once again, facepalmed.
“Why are you slapping yourself?” he asked.
I facepalmed for the third time.
A lavender unicorn - Twilight Shiny, Night Sparkle or something like that - entered the shop, a notebook floating behind her enveloped in a magenta glow.
“Hi, Night Shiny,” I greeted her. These ponies had really weird names.
“Uh... It’s Twilight Sparkle.” She passed me a coin. “May I purchase a quill?”
I nodded and turned around to get her her order. But, of course, genius Davenport had rearranged everything in a way that made it impossible to find anything. I looked through about 1000 sofas... I’m seriously wondering why the shop even keeps these in stock when nobody buys them. Then I spotted the last quill. I passed it to Twilight Sparkle.
“Thanks." She levitated it over her notebook, in position to write something. "Now, Princess Celestia wants to make sure that you’re happy here. How’s work?” she asked. I thought about it. There was one way to summarize it.
“It totally stinks.”
~~~
Name: TheCacophonousMuse
Prompt: 5.) Confessing to Rarity
Title: A SWEETIE DEAL
Sweetie Belle was dragging her hoof back and forth across the plush carpet, wearing a trough beneath the stool she was sitting on. Her face was possessed by a wavering smile, and she kept glancing nervously at her older sister, filling a customer's order.
"There you go, all done; have a nice day!" Rarity told the stallion, pushing him out the door and slamming it behind him. She checked the clock above the mantel. "Thirty five minutes for a routine stitching job! He would not stop bothering me. And I have to get thirty nun's habits sewn by seven for the cows' dress rehearsal for The Sound of Moo-sic..." she rushed into the other room, searching desperately for some tool or another. Sweetie Belle slipped quietly off of the stool she had been sitting on and followed her sister.
“Um... Rarity?” she piped up.
Rarity turned to face her younger sister with an air of impatience. “What do you want? You can't help! I'm desperate to get these orders filled tonight already, and I can't have you botching up my workspace. Now why don't you―”
“―but I need to talk to you.” Sweetie Belle opened her eyes as wide as she could and put on her customary pout. Normally she would be happy to take the free pass and leave, but she knew her sister would only be more angry if she did.
With a dramatic sigh, Rarity flopped down next to her sister. “This sounds serious. What is it?”
Sweetie Belle gulped. “Um... well...” she started haltingly.
“Yes?” her sister encouraged her.
“Well you see, um... there's this... um...”
“Just spit it out!”
“All right, all right!” Sweetie Belle licked her lips nervously, focusing on a spot somewhere above Rarity's head. “You remember that time when I stole your diary and had it printed in the foal free press?”
Rarity's eyes narrowed, but she nodded.
“Well, I, uh, saw something in there about, um, a certain Prince...”
Rarity shifted uncomfortably. She looked at the shop entrance, as though to make sure they were alone.
“Well, I, uh... called up this Prince Blueblood....”
“You WHAT?!?!?!?”
Sweetie Belle cowered against the wall.
“I didn't mean to mess anything up, honest! We just wanted our matchmaking cutie marks, and it was Scootaloo's idea, I swear!”
“What. Have. You. Done?” Rarity's expression grew more menacing with each word.
“We... uh... might have... uh... accidentally told him that... uh... you were Princess Celestia's younger sister, that you were a member of the wonderbolts, that you were a secretly a superhero, and that he should go on a date with you.”
Rarity stared blankly at her sister. After a few seconds, a small moan escaped her lips. “You do realize that I left him at the gala because he was a conceited jerk?”
“Um...” Sweetie Belle smiled sheepishly. “He'll pick you up at seven.”
And with that, she turned and ran out of the Boutique, Rarity's stream of profanity trailing behind her like a cape.
~~~
Name: Overdonefictions
Prompt: Found Twilight's super secret diary.
Title:Privacy
During the past couple of visits to Twilight's house. Rainbow Dash had noticed a small leather book on Twilight's study table. This was no textbook, as was evident by the lack of pages. Rainbow Dash became more and more curious about the purpose of the book. One night, Twilight had asked Rainbow Dash to watch the library for her, while she and Spike ran some errands.
Once Twilight had left, Rainbow Dash saw her opportunity to peek inside the book. Rainbow crept up to the desk quietly, even though Twilight was gone. Rainbow rested her bottom in Twilight's chair and cracked open the book to the first page. She noticed quickly that this was Twilight's diary, and against her better judgement, she read it anyways.
The first page was of her first day in Ponyville. Rainbow read it out loud, expecting something embarrassing.
"Today was a really hectic day. Could you believe, diary, that I had to fight an ancient evil? I did get to make some friends." Rainbow began trailing off as she read "They all had pretty kickin' bodies. I'd tap 'em"
Rainbow Dash reread that last sentence a dozen times. She almost put the book down. Rainbow was very confused, not sure if she should feel proud of her "kickin' body" or creeped out about Twilight objectifying her like that. Rainbow wanted to see whether that was just a one time thing, she wanted to see if that was a joke or something, to keep her friends out of her diary. Rainbow read the next page.
"Princess Celestia sent me tickets to the Grand Galloping Gala. I was excited to meet some hoes there, but I had an extra to bring a 'friend'. I swear, these mares was lined up and on they knees, beggin' me fo' this ticket. I couldn't really decide which to take. A private night with any of them would have been great. For intercourse obviously. Unfortunately, Celestia sent extra tickets, so now there's no private time for Twilight. Horseapples."
Rainbow didn't like where this was going. She began scanning pages for her name. She found one and read it anxiously.
"So my friend Rainbow Dash visited me today, and luckily, Spike was out doing dragon stuff. She crashed through my window, all sweaty and glistening. I had to get my **** in that. She asked for a drink of water, since she had been exercising. There was my chance. I went into the kitchen, got her some water, and roofied her. Once I was sure she was ready, I whipped out my horse **** and shoved it-"
Rainbow threw the book across the room, shocked. She picked it back up again and quickly read the next page.
"Sho' nuff, she don't remember a thing."
Rainbow replaced the book on Twilight's desk and curled up on the floor, whimpering. Twilight was not what she seemed. Rainbow knew the truth now, and had to keep it a secret. Twilight couldn't find out she read her diary, and everyone else couldn't know about Twilight. Surely Twilight was still her friend, but Rainbow realized that she could never look at her the same.
End.
~~~
Name: Duelist96
Prompt: Twilight's Secret Diary
Title: Twinkle Twinkle Little Star
Twilight and I are very close friends. We could talk about anything, and by anything I mean anything. We would share secrets, nervous feelings that one of us might have, and even secret crushes that we had on somepony. At least that is what I thought until I found her diary laying on her desk.
Twilight invited me over to her house because she needed a favor from me. She wanted me to house sit for her while she and Spike went out to help the princess with an urgent errand. I agreed to house sit for her until she came back.
"Don't you usually have an owl though that could also watch your house" I asked?
"I did, but I have no idea where he has been for the past couple of months" replied Twilight.
"Well I am pretty sure he will come back at some point so don't worry too much about" I replied.
By then I should have realized that something was wrong because Owlicious would never be gone for this long. Even if the owl was gone that long Twilight showed no concern or sadness that he was gone.
"I headed out now, don't want to be late with the princess" said Twilight.
"Okay and have a safe trip there and back" wishing the best for Twilight.
So now I am all alone in her house. As a good friend I decide to to keep the place tidy and organized for her return. As I am cleaning through her house I notice a book on her desk. I pick up the book and I notice on the front cover that it says, "Private Twilight Only."
I open the book and begin to skim through the pages. Looking through this book I begin to realize that this is Twilight's diary. Against my better judgement of being a good friend I decided to open up the book and read her private thoughts.
As I read through the book some of the entries contain secrets that we have already talked about. So I decide to skip to a more recent entry and notice that it talks about Owlicious. I begin to skim through the book until I come across something so disturbing that I had to re-read the line again.
"The nightmares are starting to tell me that Owlicious is trying to corrupt me and that he needs to go."
"The restless nights have become so unbearable that I have started contemplating on killing Owlicious."
"Tonight is the night I kill the Owl and stop the voices from driving me over the edge."
As I read through I notice that some of the pages are missing except for the last line that mentions me.
"The owl has finally been taken care of but the nightmares have increased in even more frequency that now I have to kill my closest friend."
As I read that a piece of paper falls out and I pick it up. I open up the piece of paper and notice that it is a plan on how to murder me and apparently I fell right into the trap.
"Hello Twilight." Last words that I ever spoke.
~~~
Name: Kolwynia
Prompt: You have a confession to make to Rarity, you are a human working at Quills & Sofas, Pinkie Pie is staring at you, Ditzy Doo gives you a package with no address, and you find a book in Twilight's library that turns out to be her diary.
Title: The Girl from the Other Side of the Fourth Wall
You are standing in the Ponyville heat, sweat beading on your ivory forehead, dressed in a stuffed sofa costume. It’s your boss’s latest brilliant attempt to bring in the customers and it would annoy you, but you have more important concerns. Like how exactly you are going to tell Rarity your secret…
Besides, Twilight got you this job and you should be grateful for it. Even if it did mean getting stared at by ponies all day. Like that one over there. She’s had her eyes on you for hours. What is her problem?! Wait a second… is that…? It is! It’s Twilight Sparkle’s friend Pinkie! What does she want?
“Excuse me, Miss?” a voice asks from behind you. You turn (not easy dressed as a couch) and there’s the gray mailmare with the bubbles cutie mark. “I have a package for you.”
There is no name and no return address on the package. You sign for it and open it up. In the box is a key, and under it, a folded note. There’s something on it, written in a careless hand. Hoof, you correct yourself. You really have to get used to the lingo here. Then you read the note.
Twilight has been lying to you. If you want the truth, go to the library right now.
You nearly drop the note. Your hand is shaking. Twilight can’t be lying to you. She’s been the one helping you since you got here. She’s your friend. But your heart is racing and you have to know.
Your boss isn’t too happy with you taking off during peak business hours, but he lets you go. You race to the library and find it deserted. The door’s locked. You reach into your skirt pocket and find the key. Could it be? With a click the door is unlocked. You feel self-conscious, like a trespasser. You cast a worried glance around and notice Pinkie across the street, dressed in what she thinks is a disguise, still staring at you. What does she want?
There’s nopony in the library. It’s clean, except for a book lying on the floor. You pick it up. There is no title on the cover so you open it. As you scan the pages you realize that this is Twilight’s journal. You ought to put it back, but instead you read. You find what you were looking for…
I got the alternate Sweetie Belle a job at Quills & Sofas. She still hasn’t gotten the courage to tell Rarity who she is, and I can’t help but wonder how Rarity will take it when she does. This is all my fault. Well, mine and Pinkie’s. But how could we have known that taking somepony from that universe would collapse it?
I don’t know how to tell the human Sweetie Belle. She seems happy here, but will that change when she finds out she can never return to her own world?
When you’ve read the entire entry, you walk outside and stand in the sun.
“Are you okay?” a voice asks. It’s Pinkie.
“You sent me that note,” you say.
Pinkie nods. She is on the verge of tears. You hear her try to explain, to apologize.
“Where’s Rarity?” you ask.
There’s something you need to tell her.
~~~
Name: WWAPD
Prompt: You find a book in Twilight’s Library that turns out to be her diary hidden in plain sight. What do you do with it? More importantly, do you dare look inside?
Title: The Book of Too Many Secrets
I’ve always enjoyed Twilight Sparkle’s book collection. She has so many books on so many different topics, I often wonder whether or not she’s read them all herself. It doesn’t matter that I’m an earthpony, I’ve always liked books about magic. Unfortunately, I am no longer aloud in her library, a sad fact that I deeply wish I could change.
Let me explain: Not too long ago, no more than a month or so, I was in Twilight’s library (upon her permission) looking for a book on love potions. Well, I wasn’t exactly looking for a book on love, I was looking for an output that was something less noble. Something like lust, or seduction. I know I could have gone to Zecora’s, and in hindsight I wish I did, but Twilight has always been so much more approachable.
So anyways, there I was, running my eyes through the rather modest potion section of Twilight’s library. Twilight herself was out, I think buying quills or something else equally as lame. Spike was gone too, so I was left to hold down the fort.
Now on with my story. Not once in coming here have I ever seen a book out of alphabetical order. Except that day. Call it OCD, but the moment I saw that ugly-ass, pink notebook I absolutely had to return it to it’s rightful spot. So I removed it from the shelf.
"Making Magic Work For You: Incantations and Spells for the Modern World" read the cover. The title was rather strange, as almost every spell known to ponies was written over a thousand years ago. There wasn’t a pony in Equestria that could just make up a bunch of brand-new convenient spells, and publish them willy-nilly.
Scribbled across the inside cover was not a table of contents, but a second title: "The Diary of Twilight Sparkle - may it someday enchant those who read it". I looked around the room. Twilight and Spike were still out.
I probably shouldn’t have read it, but temptation got the better of me. After all, who didn’t want to know what Twilight Sparkle thought about when she was alone? What was even more tempting was the title. Who was going to say no to being enchanted by the Twilight Sparkle? Probably most ponies. But not me! I turned to the first page and began to read. The diary was at least four hundred pages long, and to this day I dare not utter a word of it to another soul.
As I finished the last page, both Twilight and Spike came in through the door. One look at me and the book I was reading, and she had me pinned up against the wall. She approached me, her face inches from mine. The look in her eyes told me to keep my mouth shut.
“I’d like you to leave,” she said, and with that she released her grasp on me. I was gone in less than half a second.
Since then, I’ve noticed something’s changed inside me. Something that wasn’t there before. It has to do with Twilight, as I cannot stop thinking about her. Her coat, her mane, her cutie mark, I now realize she’s perfect. I think she did enchant me with that diary. Or rather, she seduced me.
~~~
Lord English 777
2) Derpy/ Ditzy Doo gives you a package with no address on it. What’s inside?
The Question Box
It’s been maybe a hour since I’ve been mysteriously transported to Equestria. In the 60 minutes preceding this one I’ve made out with each one of the mane six, defeated Discord again, and sent Nightmare moon to the moon, twice. Oh, and I broke my watch, so that could have easily been never. God, I hope none of that actually happens.
“If I had a guinea for every bad writing prompt, I’d-- BOOF!?” I sputtered, being cut short by a totally normal, inconspicuous box flying out of the heavens to smash into what previously was a very nice nose.
Seeing gray feathers flutter out of the corner of my vision set my cheesy fanfiction sense on high alert. Whatever’s in this box is probably going to be very, very meta. So meta, in fact, that I’ll probably end up being in a Homestuck fanfic by the end of this.
I can only hope.
Of course, I can always just not open the damn thing, I guess. Maybe if I don’t, all those things I mentioned in the first paragraph will happen...
“Open up, you corrugated brown son of a bitch.” I growled, taking my chances with Andrew Hussie. What kind of figment of some amorphous mound of brony’s imagination would I be if I didn’t take the route of weak situational comedy? Vash the Stampede, maybe. At least he has some character development. I think. Wait, have I ever seen Trigun before, or am I just breaking the fourth wall to pander to the audience?
Get on with it!
Oh, shit. Right. Box. I pulled my ever-present shiv out of that weird hole in my body that I’m pretty sure Link gets his stuff out of too and slashed the tape holding the box shut. Putting the lethally sharpened ruler away as to not get arrested by the no-doubt adorable pony police and be dragged laughing all the way to the nuthouse, I opened the box.
Inside was a calico batting idly at the skeleton of what I’m going to assume was another calico. The bored feline looked up and gave me a solidly unimpressed meow before jumping out of the box and curling around my legs.
“Well, not that it hasn’t always been a dream of mine to own the skeleton of a housepet, but what the fuck.” I said, rattling the box’s contents in a dubious mixture of confusion and anger.
I was so confusedly angry that my massive iron ball-and-chain fell out of the horrifying, all-consuming vortex in my back, crushing the calico.
“Quixote, NO!!” I shouted in anguish, immediately dropping the box in a fit of baseless sentimentality, earning a disgruntled meow.
There was another cat in the box. Rather than take the obvious course of action and immediately murder this one for shits and giggles, I made a beeline for the nearest porta-poop.
The moral of the story is: Montezuma’s revenge is a bitch and I didn’t find a porta-poop so I took a dump in the dumpster behind the library.
~~~
TheRealRainbowDash
Prompt 4: Discuss your employment at Quills and Sofas shop as a Human in Equestria.
Title: Grin and bear it!
There's a family of bears living in the northwest corner of Quills and Sofas. Davenport doesn't know. The shop is so big and has such a ridicoulous number of sofas that I doubt he'd find them if he did believe me. They have a back entrance that they leave through and they've commandered three of the sofa's for themselves. Their's is a grisly tale of lust, betrayal and murder. If you'll listen, then I'll tell you plainly.
It started on a Sunday. It was slow and I was feeling terrible because I had gotten bird flu from the quills. (Go figure.) I took that as the opportunity to take my unauthorized three hour break. I wouldn't miss anything, Twilight is the only one who buys quills and I don't think the butt ugly sofas would be missed if they were stolen.
I followed that maze of chairs of all shapes and sizes until I thought I was a suitable distance away from where Davenport might be and laid down for a nap. I awoke just in time to witness the horrific crime.
A young filly, maybe seven years old sat down in a purple chair several feet away from me. Through half closed eyes glued shut with sleep I saw her jump back up immediately, claiming the chair too hard. Then she sat down on a pink chiar. It was apparently too soft. I think, of course, that you all know how this story goes. At last, in the chair that was just right, she settled down to sleep. I allowed myself to fall back into my slumber. But it wasn't for long.
Wet ripping awoke me. The sound of fabric and skin tearing, bones and sinew grinding away. The world was red. Screaming. 'Someone's been sleeping in my chair and she's still there!". A roar. And then silence. But not for long.
I could hear the heavy pawprints advancing towards me. I opened my eyes and I shouted...
"Hilary, Lloyd and Jimbo, would you shut up! I'm trying to sleep off the bird flu. No, I won't play 'Murder the Innocent Filly' with you. Yes, I'm sure. No, the pouty face won't change my mind. Yes, I know I'm the one who created the story of Goldilocks, but I don't care. Oh, and kid that was good, but you gotta work on looking more innocent, mmkay?"
I heard four sighs and then went back to sleep.
To summarize: I can BEARLY stand the shitty job I have at Quills and Sofas.
~~~
PonyPong
Prompt 3)You find a book in Twilight’s Library that turns out to be her diary hidden in plain sight. What do you do with it? More importantly, do you dare look inside?
Title:Harley The Snoop
I pushed my brown curls back behind my ear. Who knew that waiting in the middle of a library could be so stressful? Twilight was looking for a book on technology for me, leaving me alone in the middle of The Golden Oaks Library. I decided to look around, why is she taking so long? I trotted over near the realistic-fiction section and stare at the book covers. The books were piled up against the walls, it's probably just clean up day. I push Perks Of Being A Wallpony back into it's slot. As I trot back to the same spot as before.
Thump!
"Ow! What wa-" I wince. I had trip over one of the books of the ground and fell flat onto my face.
I push myself back up to my hooves and stare queerly at the hardcover laying on the floor. It had no title or cover, it was just purple.
"What the hay?" I rub my head and pick up the book. Both sides are just solid purple no title, no design, no nothing.
I turn my head to the left over my shoulder, I do the same to the right. What would there be to look inside? I flatten my ears and turn to the first page. My ears fly up and my eyes widen as I begin to read...
June 7, 2013
10:00 AM
Dear Diary,
Today I had to make breakfast without the help of Smarty Pants. I hope she isn't mad at me, but she was so busy doing her homework that I was afraid to ask her to come and cook with me. Also, Spike was asleep so I had to cook for him too. Although, my stove is burnt and almost ruined from all the fire... I can proudly say that my homemade breakfast in bed was a success!
Your Master, Twilight Sparkle
I clamp my hoof over my mouth to hold back a laugh and flip halfway through the diary, this was so wrong.
June 10, 2013
12:00 AM
Dear Diary,
I'm really, really, really tired from reading all day. I know that it's a good thing to do and all but, Princess Celestia thinks too much of me. How does she believe that I can read 12 books from front to back in one day? But, that doesn't matter I'll get that done after I have my first date with Rainbow Dash tonight she's so cute sometimes especially when she gets those wing b-
I heard a faint rustle coming from the back room and I threw the dairy across the room. Twilight emerged with the technology book in her aurora grasp.
"Sorry it took so long Harley, I saw this new book on my desk that Spike got for me. and I had to take a peek. Here you go!" Twilight said and handed me the book.
I grabbed it and threw it onto my back.
"Uh, thanks Twilight... Good luck with Rainbow Dash! Oh wait I mean..." I blushed nervously and flew away slowly.
"Wait how did you? Nah, it's probably nothing..." she said and closed the library door behind her.
~~~
Name: Aethraspex
Prompt: 2) Derpy/ Ditzy Doo gives you a package with no address on it. What’s inside?
Title: What's Inside?
I was walking outside Ponyville, minding my own business when suddenly: Derpy out of nowhere. She, as literally as I can imagine, dropped out of the sky and landed square on my back. It was a predetermined coincidence, a crossing of fate.
“Oh, there you are,” she said. Her carefree casual voice had cutting clarity after the crushing blow begotten by her bubbled behind. “This is for you!” And so she was gone, trotting down the dirt road, looking at two things at once.
It was a package. Plain, unmarked, around the size of two stacked books from Twilight’s library. Awoken and arisen, having turned it over and over in my magic, I discovered six cardboard faces, one opening sealed with tape and naught else. Puzzled, I opened it.
Or rather, I peeled away at the tape. Or rather, I tried. Magic is a fickle substance. Like a winter morning’s misty breath, it is subtle, and though effortlessly produced, to bend it to your will requires skill and finesse. But there is no skill to peeling away tape, nothing requiring a delicate hoof and mind. You simply peel it away and be done with it. I could not.
A second and third try yielded similar outcomes. Magical sparks blinked in and out of existence at one end of the strip, then the other. Rubbing it with my hoof had no effect. Rubbing with my teeth only filled my mouth with cardboard. I focused, pooled my concentration on my horn, and pulled. The aura of my efforts glowed like a line of stars along the tapes’s edge. The light was so bright I thought it might burn through the cardboard instead. Harder I pulled, pouring all my energy into the sole action. Yet I felt nothing. No pull, no give. Nothing... Nothing... Something! Success! A weak point exposed, the rest of the tape crumbled beneath my might in seconds. Surely now, I thought, those mysterious contents would be mine.
I was wrong.
I tried to pull at the box, slide out the tray that contained my prize, but it would not budge, not even slightly. What fiend would create such a box!? Who would see fit to punish me so for seeking my own possessions? I pulled harder, my whole aura engulfing the devilish contraption. Soon, it was between my hooves, my neck straining backwards and my horn about to break. Finally it was on the ground, my whole weight pinning it and all my magic pulling. With a cry of fury and despair I flung the hideous receptacle against a nearby tree...
I was trembling then. Air rasped my throat as I dragged it into my lungs and coughed it back out. The package lay before me, crumpled yet unopened. What was it that I was expending so much effort to obtain? What mysteries were I trying to uncover? A secret missive from a mysterious organisation? A priceless artifact from a lost civlisation? It came down to one question and one alone. What’s inside? WHAT’S INSIDE!?
My final success was but briefly met with maniacal laughter. Sitting among shattered dreams and packing foam I realised the gift, the vase I thought would decorate my mantelpiece, would never sit there now. Instead I watched its cursed container lie below, burning brightly
~~~
Your Name: Authora97
Prompt: You have a confession to make to Rarity
Title of your work: The Worst Possible Thing
I was running as fast as my hooves could take me, I didn’t have much time. I had to see her. Needed to see her. It was like my very life depended on making it to the Boutique and telling it to the unicorn inside. The importance was almost highlighted by the rain pouring over my head.
Finally, I could see the purple horses atop the Carousel Boutique. It was still oh so far away, barely speck in the distance. This only made me push harder.
I ran past random houses, splashing in the puddles that had formed, with the Dress shop getting closer with each gallop.She was just so close, I only had to run a little farther…
Busting down the door (I didn’t have time to knock) I found the place submerged in darkness. The place must’ve been closed. Then I remembered it was Saturday so Rarity must be at the Spa with Fluttershy.
Ditching the house I had just broken into, I began running towards Aloe and Lotus’ spa. In the process I knocked over Candlelight. The town’s Candle Maker.
“NO!” She screamed, giving a quick glance back I saw I had accidentally knocked over the candle she had been holding. It was still aflame despite the rain. It hadn’t just fallen to the ground, it dropped to the ground right next to a building and the rain winds moved the flame. Quickly setting the building a flame
Again, over the pouring rain.
Still wanting to find Rarity and avoid getting arrested for this I continued my journey to the Spa.
Slipping only twice on the muddy ground, the only landmark I saw was Sugarcube Corner. I could hear Pinkie singing a song of cupcakes as I quickly ran by.
“That’s her!” Giving a fearful look back, the orange glow of the burning building appeared in my eyesight as well as the cops that had begun to chase me.
“Horseapples!” I swore before running even faster.
“Stop right there!” One of the policestallions yelled.
Pushing myself a little harder, I ended up making a sharp turn a little too sharply. Bumping into another pony, this one a stallion. He had apparently been holding a lamp and it crashed right onto his horn, knocking it square off.
Seeing this and the cops getting closer, I leaped over the fallen stallion and began to run faster towards the Spa.
Almost too late, I finally saw the pink and yellow building just a little farther ahead. Looking back one last time before running inside, I saw the angry glares of five policestallions turning a corner a heading my way.
Wasting no more time I ran into the spa. Quickly I pushed one couch in front of the door so I had all the time I needed. Turning away from the door and couch I saw the earth pony twins waiting by the front door.
“I need to see Rarity, it’s an emergency!”
They both nodded, guiding me to the mud baths were Rarity and Fluttershy both were.
“Rarity!” I yelled when I ran into the room. Both mares turned to me, Rarity removing the cucumbers slices over her eyes.
“You? Oh dear mare what it is?” Rarity asked.
I stared at Rarity for a moment, focusing on the thing I had to confess. It helped none that there were sounds of the police coming in.
Just as one yelled for me, I told Rarity that thing I had been trying to tell her all day...
“Buck, I completely forgot.”
My sentence was just, I was given 5 years for Arson (would’ve been 10 if it was on purpose) and another 5 for making the stallion’s horn fall off.
The whole time I was in there, the confession I had been trying to tell Rarity haunted me. Never able to remember exactly what I had been trying to tell her. So, it was all for nothing.
Worst. Day. Ever.
~~~
iDash
Prompt: You find Twilight's diary...
Title: Seriously, What Did You Expect?
The feeling of soft leather plays under your hoof as you browse the large collection of books in the oaken library. The sound of footsteps descending the stairs reaches your ears. A voice speaks up as the dragon at the bottom of the stairs addresses you.
“Oh, you’re here. What’s up? Looking for anything in particular?”
“No,” you answer casually. “I just finished that Daring Doo book, so I’m just looking for another read. What about you, Spike?”
Spike, who had made his way over to the couch, falls onto the cushions with an exhausted sigh.
“Twi’s been riding and making me work all week. She’s been working non-stop on another one of her crazy experiments again. This is the first time she’s slept in three days, so it’s probably the only break I get.”
You nod sympathetically as you listen to the young dragon’s harrowing hardship. You, as well as everypony else that knew Twilight, know that the mare can be a little... excessive, to say the least.
Just as you are speculating whether or not it would be a good idea to ask what the ‘crazy experiment’ was,- or if you really cared to know, for that matter- something catches your eye.
It’s a plain, hardcover book with a black cover. You’ve never seen it before, though, as often as you visit the library. You set the book on a small table. It’s completely blank and, oddly enough, it has a lock connected to a strap, so as to keep it shut.
“Hey, what’s this?” you call to Spike.
He looks up and blinks. “What’s what?”
You point at the object in question. “This book. I’ve never seen it here before and it’s completely blank.”
Spike raises a brow, skeptical, but gets up anyways and walks over to you. “What do you think it is?” you ask when he arrives.
He scratches his head as he studies it.
“It seems familiar,” he says. Then, his eyes slowly widen in realization.
“No way. This is... this is Twi’s diary.”
Your eyebrows shoot up in a bewildered expression. “Twilight has a diary?”
Spike nods. “It was a birthday gift from Rarity. I never thought she’d actually use it, though. I mean, c’mon, it’s Twilight.”
You nod in agreement. Hey, it’s mean, but true. Twi doesn’t have much of a... life. Socially, at least. She writes to Celestia or tells you and her other friends about everything she does.
Needless to say, this was surprising.
“What do you think’s in it. Do you really think she has secrets we don’t know about?”
“Only one way to find out,” Spike says. He takes one of his claws and inserts it deftly into the keyhole. He wiggles it around until there’s a soft click and the strap falls to the side. You both then stare at it hesitantly, as if it were a sleeping Ursa Minor.
What unknown enigmas could it hold?
Spike, brave as ever, steps up and places a hand on the diary. “Ready?”
You both gulp and he slowly opens to one of the pages. This is it, the defining moment. You are about to discover the darkest secrets you didn’t even know your sheltered friend had.
It falls to a page as Spike opens it. However, rather than appalling secrets, you find... this:
.... What.
Spike facepalms. Hard. “Of course. She probably doesn’t even know what a diary is.”
You sigh and shake your head, “Poor Twilight. It’s almost sad.”
~~~
Name- Nexosaur
Prompt- 3) You find a book in Twilight’s Library that turns out to be her diary hidden in plain sight. What do you do with it? More importantly, do you dare look inside?
Title: OPEN BOOK
"Should I really do this?" Rainbow Dash asked herself as she slightly lifted the cover of the black-bound journal, sweat pouring down her face. "Should I really snoop into Twilight's personal belongings? What if there's stuff I don't want to know?"
Rainbow Dash was sitting in the middle of the library, where she had been told to stay while Twilight went out to get a shipment of the newest Daring Do.
Rainbow Dash's mind was in turmoil as she opened and closed the diary cover, hyperventilating. She felt her hoof move more than usual and found that she had turned to the first page.
"I- I," she said as she looked at the first few words. "I can't!"
She threw the book down and covered her face with her hooves.
'If I did this, Twilight would get so angry!"
Taking calming breaths, she started to pull herself away from the object.
"I'll just find somewhere else to sit where I don't have to see it."
But she could not move. She was locked in place, her body seemingly magnetically attracted to the secrets of her friend.
"Oh, Celestia, I've got to get away!"
She told herself so many things to get away from the diary, but it did not work, and only left her moving closer to the darkness.
"I'm the Element of Loyalty!" she cried. "Doing this would make me not loyal to Twilight! She'd hate me forever if I did this!"
But yet the urge to pick it up and read was overpowering, like too much alcohol on a Friday night. Her hoof crept across the floor to the diary, which she grabbed and slowly brought to her face.
**** 10
Dear Diary,
Today I found out that Spike's fire can't hurt a pony! I discovered this when he accidentally spat it at me when I surprised him. I singed my fur a bit, but left most of me untouched. Tomorrow, I plan on experimenting with it, learning what objects it can or cannot-
Rainbow Dash slammed the book shut and threw it across the room.
"No!" she screamed. "I am the Element of Loyalty! I should not be doing that!"
She slammed her face on her hooves to try and reawaken her senses, but they remained dull.
"I'm a terrible friend," she told herself, starting to tear up. "If I can't even stay away from my own friend's private diary."
This sadness brought about a new change in Rainbow Dash, and she stood.
"I'll just put the diary away, and I can forget this ever happened."
She went over to the book and picked it up with her mouth. She took it and went to Twilight's bedroom, where she set it on her bed. And with that, she went downstairs to do something that involved less "snooping around in your friend's possessions."
THE END
~~~
Fictionfilly
Prompt 1) pinkie pie is staring at you. Why?
The most embarrassing day of my life.
I was sitting at the table with my friends. I would have usually had an enjoyable lunch. I had my favourite. Summer lollipops and hay bacon strips. But there was one disturbing thing. Pinkie pie kept staring at me. It wasn't just now either. It had been all through English, and maths, and home ec! Finally I gave up and just went over to her. "Well?..." "Well what? She said happily. "Why have you been staring at me all through school?" "Now calm down she said. "Calm down? Calm down!" "Ok..." "No, listen up, I am not just some kind of..." "The whole school is watching..." "Explain yourself!" Pinkie sighed. "Somepony cursed your hair green."
~~~
Name: GWFan (The Softcore Brony)
Prompt: 5) You have a confession to make to Rarity
Title: My Little Soul Mate
Words: 550
had been knocking furiously for about a minute when I heard hooves dashing like mad inside and the door flew open.
“What!? What is it!? Is the Boutique burning down!?” The occupant of the boutique, Rarity, looked haggard despite her still perfect mane with a sleeping mask tangled in it. She appeared frantic at first but stared at me with a strangely quizzical look once she stopped freaking out. “It’s five in the morning. This better be a fashion emergency in the least.”
I had known better I would almost say she looked angry but I knew that couldn’t be true. “Rarity, I’m sorry to disturb you so early but I couldn’t wait any longer. I came to tell you that I think you and I are soul mates.”
If she looked quizzical before, she appeared dumbfounded now. “I think I’m still half asleep. Beg your pardon?”
“I’ve been watching you for a long time now Rarity, and I realized that you and I belong together.”
“Ooooookaaaaay… Why?”
“Think about it Rarity, think about who you and I are. The fashion thing, we’re ponies, we don’t normally wear clothes. And yet here you are toiling day after day proving to the world that we’re more than ponies with your amazing designs. Ponies like us, we understand what others refuse to see anymore. The connection with the legends passed down over the centuries by the greatest of the great about the mysterious of the mysterious. We are meant to know what they were like and you benefit the cause with your desire to make us more like them.”
“Them? I don’t even-”
“And me. I’m doing what I can to spread the word, to make everyone remember these legends just like you do. I study them everyday, trying to be more like them and living as they did.”
“And what are-”
“With clothes. I know I don’t wear clothes in public much but I always do at home. Some ponies think its weird, but I know you don’t. You understand what we’re trying to do. The legend still lives on in our hearts and through our combined efforts, as a team, you and I could bring that legend alive in everyone’s lives. Will you join me Rarity? Will you travel down the road with me on our most glorious quest to bring these legends to life again?”
Though she still wore a look of complete cluelessness on her face, I knew she must have realized our connection long ago and that any moment she would fling her hooves open in an inviting embrace.
Oddly though, Rarity sighed. “It’s way too early in the morning for this. I realize you’ve probably had too much caffeine or something… I hope… but, I think you need some sleep and maybe see a psychiatrist… soon. So if you don’t mind, I’m just going to go back to bed and pretend this never happened for both of our sakes.”
“But Rarity…”
“Really darling, you need help. Good night Lyra.” And the door closed.
I stood there for a moment watching the door to see if she would come back out until the light inside turned off. I walked away and only looked back once with one thing on my mind. “She called me darling.”
~~~
Name: Fresh Cookies
Prompt: 3) You find a book in Twilight’s Library that turns out to be her diary hidden in plain sight. What do you do with it? More importantly, do you dare look inside?
Title: IT'S THREE IN THE F ING MORNING WHAT AM I DOING
____________________________________________________________________________________________
I'm just lazing around the tree when I look on the ground and a medium-sized, leather-bound book is sitting there.
I ignore it, walk up into my room...
...and trip on said book.
I started screaming in pain while hopping on one foot, seeing as how nopony was around, and started caressing my foot.
Some dust had fallen off of the book, and I could now read it.
"Diary..." I opened the book, my disorientation making me feel light-headed and woozy.
"Propert~~y of Twilight~~ Spa~~rkle~~ COLORING BOOK
"Huh... a diary gone mad?"
There, in a very neat font, was a letter to Princess Celestia.
Over the letter was a drawing of a purple blob.
The door opened a few hours later.
"MAESTRO ROBERTO, QUE TIENES MI DIARIO!"
Oh snap, Twilight was in her angry maid mood again. I started running around the tree, and she knocked me flat on my face with a wok.
I blame you, dear reader, for this madness.